Its a 2 car garage with a wall going down the middle separating where the car goes and where the shop is. Right now a lot of space in the shop is occupied by a lawn mower, the garbage/recycling bins, a lot of yardwork and other tools, and a large generator. Ideally we would put some of these things in a shed, but ours had to be demolished a while back and we haven't had the time or money to make a foundation for a proper shed that won't fall apart. There is no space to move, to work, to think.
This is more than a shop lay out problem. Its my life. I struggle establishing boundaries, half of the space is basically used by my mom for storing things in the least space efficient way possible. I don't know what's really important. It feels like all of the projects I've invested a lot of time and money into end up going nowhere or being abandoned. I don't have proper dust collection, I have never even attempted to turn on the planer I bought. I don't remember the sense of wonder or joy of making anything.
Even the decision and the action of writing this post asking for help is now an obstacle in my mind, I need to share pictures, give dimensions, say what I'm trying to make in the shop, etc etc, But the shop problems are really just an example of my greater dysfunction in life. I need to get my drivers license, I need to get a new learners permit, I need to get a new therapist, I need to get new health insurance, I need to find a job that doesn't wear away my soul. I feel like there was never really room for happiness in life, and upon this realization we still find no agency--there's nothing we can do but revel in disgust and hatred for the world we were born into. Fuck.