#Recovered Burnt out Senior Eng w ADHD looking for a job

428 messages · Page 1 of 1 (latest)

lusty shadow
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intersting : )
im also ADHD , but i can't quite my job : (
: ))

austere cobalt
austere cobalt
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Gonna work on my resume this morning 😎 finally getting into the groove, just needed 7.5 weeks to recoop from 8+ years of working

austere cobalt
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Already feeling stuck (again) but for now i think i might just focus on building my resume "from scratch"... my old resume feels so 🤢

austere cobalt
upper marsh
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I saved that from someone else, I think vcarl

austere cobalt
austere cobalt
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so smart

sage matrix
austere cobalt
austere cobalt
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Still struggling

sage matrix
austere cobalt
sage matrix
austere cobalt
fathom forge
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Morning sunlight is good

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Unless you live in Vancouver or Seattle sigh but definitely try to get it, it’s proven to boost mood attention etc

austere cobalt
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Got derailed from making any progress today

fathom forge
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Longer is better but at least 20 minutes

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Helps improve sleep quality as well

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One the few things I’ve got going

austere cobalt
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Lemme go outside now @fathom forge

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I'm feeling like absolute balls

fathom forge
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Well done

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For an added boost you can slowly start jogging but best to start small imo

austere cobalt
austere cobalt
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Trying to get back into it

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XD

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Last few weeks have been focused on some other things. (shit happens ig). I think I might have one bullet point of my resume solidified.

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I find it extremely difficult to quantity impact when I've made so much of it I can't quantify it ...

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Like whenever I go to list the projects I've delivered I get knots in my stomach because idk how to summarize

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I want to stick to a one page resume so bad so I feel I must get extremely creative and concise about demonstrating my experience in resume bullets

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Recovered Burnt out Senior Eng w ADHD looking for a job

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Btw 3 months vacation and spiritual reset did the trick and I feel "normal" again

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I do miss writing code...

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🙂

austere cobalt
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Built sign-up, landing, and checkout for internet, insurance, moving, and utility products

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I wrote this because i want to convey the number of products and verticals i was responsible for shipping. but ive rethought it a bit

austere cobalt
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Delivered bid-winning demo for <redacted> alliance contract using NodeJS, Docker, Apollo GraphQL Subscriptions, React and CSS Modules (?)

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Lead fullstack team of 4 engineers to deliver new integration between newly acquired <Redacted> product which realized 1 M In revenue
i am bad at wording things and i remember the highlights but
that was in Docker NodeJS, Apollo, React, CSS Modules as wel

austere cobalt
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@barren chasm thanks for the help in the DMs

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you the real one

austere cobalt
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hi

austere cobalt
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aestheticcute Job Search Progress aestheticcute

Day 1
💛 Calls scheduled: 16
🧡 Calls completed: 1
💙 Interview Rounds Passed: 0
💚 Offers: 0
💔 Rejections: 0

meager heron
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Omg 16 calls scheduled this is so many!

upper marsh
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I highly recommend keeping notes so you can keep track of which company said what

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I only did that this last time, and it helped tremendously. I basically can't keep track if it's more than 3 companies at a time

proud tide
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gl semi

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and i agree defo keep notes, i also interview in batches and by the end of the week i cant remember anything from the first half of the job batch

austere cobalt
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Got you both!!! I took some notes for sure

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Ugh, it's been crazy @upper marsh @proud tide

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It feels like a Friday

austere cobalt
sterile dome
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wow that's a lot flushed_________________

austere cobalt
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I'll post my updates today, crushed a few rounds. Came up with a technique with leetcode that helps me (but mostly because I've done all these problems before whethe it be in college or my last interview loop , and I don't have the patience, time or energy to grind)

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I gotta workout 😅

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Stupid physical body

austere cobalt
austere cobalt
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Alright wow, damn, this is crazy!

I can cover which leetcode questions I got asked so far if anyone is curious.

I did NOT study leetcode really prior to jumping in just because I couldn't will myself to care about leetcode without being in the interview loop during the peak of summer in the north east.

Now, I'm doing grind 75 and it's going well .but honestly... I know this stuff already. I did these algorithms in an upper glad class years ago, like, a decade... I've solved them in other interviews, I've found them while needing to implement an algo at work while googling. I don't feel I really need to redo the act of learning how these algos work. Instead I'm working on admiring and reviewing the typescript submissions and finding one that speaks to me, clean it up, and then I try to see if I can remember it intuitively and put together the problem and solution. If I get stuck, I go back to thinking, and then write some comments. For my 30 year old mush brain..this is awesome., Fun, and not painful

If I do or don't do well in a LC style interview is no consequence to me as I can find a place I love without that practice.

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And yes, I reference the prior written solution and think through it myself as well. This is pretty straight forward to me as it helps me quickly build the ability to pattern match against different variations of the same basic problem

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Might be an unconventional approach to LC but doing them on interviews is hard and stressful enough as it is. I can't also break my brain in my down time. This is fun and even relaxing for me.

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Okay so, onto the interview I was most excited about in this loop so far -

This company is small but growing, already has a career ladder defined (something I sorely missed at my last two companies but it was late) , fits nearly all my preferences, has great funding, great team, I vibe with the interviewer, I LIKED the interview , I like that they hire college grads, I like that they have women on their team.. I don't think the work life balance sounded to crazy and no orange flags like other interviewers..ahhh

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And I looooove and would totally dog food the product

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And one of the engineers, I believe, was a founding engineer at one of my favorite tech service companies ...and built over half of this ginormous product there

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It's really exciting to envision myself at another startup. I just hope they don't work me too hard!!

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The carrot is sooo compelling

sterile dome
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this is all really great to hear though; im hopeful you'll find a company and team that truly values your experience and what you can bring to the table

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that's also a very interesting LC method PES_Think
makes sense considering you've already, well, done them in some capacity lol

sage matrix
austere cobalt
# sterile dome that's also a very interesting LC method <:PES_Think:639363477458255874> makes ...

Having flash backs to this upper graduate class is a nice feeling. I still recall what it was like to learn these things in depth. I learned about how to create linear time functions from n2 algos in my early career days, someone literally taught me how to optimize that in an interview when I was still in college. Then when I did the interview grind in 2018, I encountered a lot of these issues. I did a lot of interviews and I had gotten exposed.

Since my brain can always come up with a brute force solution, I skip that because the brute force is often, ugly, not elegant, not performant, etc. I start trying to think of techniques.

Firstly, it's important to know the basic structures, complexity of some things. I can spend time outlining what those things are, over next few days.

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Secondly, it's important to ask yourself, what does the brute force solution do, what's the complexity of it etc

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Obviously, o(1) is ideal, with o(log n) second and o(n) third. Even o(n log n) is better than o(n2).

Recall that some data structures, you can create or use (and the trade off to using additional space)...most of them have a space complexity of O(n) and a look up or operation time of O(1) depending on the structure. That means you can ask yourself, ok, what type of structure can I use to optimize this algo. If you need a straight up look up, a hashtable is great, but also, don't forget stacks, queue, linked lists, and doubly linked lists. I've been asked to implement LRU cache in two interviews, one in this round and one 4 years ago for data dog, and one didn't ask me to do it but asked me how to optimize a situation where we could use too much in memory space and I picked LRU from memory.

Another great technique, is pointers. If you're being asked to optimize without a hash table or creating non constant space, it's a hint towards using one or more pointers to help. A lot of times, two pointers coming from multiple directions in an array can be used.

Another common thing to know is basic math and how it can be utilized to answer some more obvious questions (like two sum)

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Obviously know your trees, especially binary trees. I did trees up and down college. Know how to write a binary search algo , and when you can use that (if the input is a sorted array and you're being asked to find something, this is one method to use.). Know a few things you can do with trees, like how to check if they're balanced, how to rebalance then, how to logically deduce how fo traverse them if they're being used to represent a structure of data, what the relationship between that data is and how it's represented in the tree so you can write recursive functions that traverse finding things like the lowest common ancestor

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Graph problems is , know DFS and BFS and roughly how to implement them on demand. This is most common in matrix questions.

Another thing is understanding dynamic programming is nothing but caching / memoization. In any algorithm that is recursive you might realize it's possible that many operations would be repeated, you can create a memo, or hash table structure, to store the answers to previous questions , and just pass the memo by reference everywhere

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Right so, that's a good over view so far of what I've noticed especially on the easies.

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There's some stuff I forgot but when I'm doing leet code practice I'll return here

austere cobalt
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I forgot to mention, I also did things backwards this time around. Easies I've done before so I jumped into mediums. Since I couldn't solve them too well by myself, I found YouTube videos. I began to understand in depth what the ideas were behind the thinking through these algos. Often I would look for videos that white board the algo visually. Although I have gotten tripped up on easy in an interview, but mediums are really almost variations of easies with extra twists.

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Then, id try to find a similar leetcode as the one I just watched and solve it without referencing the video, to see if I remember the thinking.

Lastly, I practice trying to write some of the code from memory. Your memory helps when you want to use array prototypes,...if you don't remember the nuances you can be in for a bad time. Taking time to Google in an interview for me can often feel uncomfortable especially if I know I should know it. But the pressure of being watched makes it worse. Frankly I look up .sort every time I use it in work - and I do not store things in my brain memory where it would make more sense to reference docs or ide hints. But definitely understand syntax enough to not need these, as some environments I've been given specifically lack ide context.

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So I know the following by heart:
Map, filter, reduce, forEach, some, every, flat..
Those are good to know for white boarding

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.sort is alphabetical in TS which is an annoying gotcha

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And in place.

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-_-

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But these were minor trip ups for me..but if I didn't solve it in the moment I'd be embarrassed (I did and made it to the next round)

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Remember when you're asked a question that's difficult to answer with practical experience they're testing your mental framework how you deal with unknowns

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The interview I'm referring to had me do a small react program and answer a trick question about API latency

sage matrix
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wow, semi, you unpacked lot a stuff here. I got interview in month or so with google. I m hope I can get up-to speed in month or so.

austere cobalt
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I have their material too

austere cobalt
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@tranquil juniper @lunar patio

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Fyi

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And @odd sail

austere cobalt
sage matrix
tranquil juniper
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👀

austere cobalt
proud tide
austere cobalt
sage matrix
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Ghosted dang.

austere cobalt
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but its okay, like, if i get rejected it might mean it wasnt a good fit for me anyway.

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I definitely docked points for trying to solve a leetcode problem in a leetcode way instead of a practical way.

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either way the convo with the EM was enlightening, and valuable imho

sage matrix
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ahh.. I get so many calls, half the time just goes into talking to recruiters. do you only do one position at a time.

austere cobalt
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By one position at a time?

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Today I'm talking to only 3 companies because I wanted to leave a big gap in mid day to utilize the last summer days for my pool

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But every day I'm talking to upwards of 4-5 companies, today I got some later rounds so they're a big longer and more intense. Scheduling less of those in a single day, and I can usually do a lot of intro calls on a day where I'm not doing lots of tech screens or second rounds

proud tide
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sheesh

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i think i have that energy for 1 week max... enviable

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blobcatsipglare recruiting needs an overhaul

austere cobalt
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But ugh

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I'm tired xD

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I feel not confident about the last interview because the format was super confusing for me

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Like they wanted me to describe a complex problem while they drew what I was explaining

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Like

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???

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I have never had a situation like that even at work. If I'm talking you're listening, trying to understand,and ask questions

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I should be the one drawing if I need to demonstrate something

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-_-

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Which I did, eventually then felt confident while doing that, but then when they asked me if I had any questions I felt really not confident and struggled

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Because in my head I just thought I failed

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So idk

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Anyways it's a bit too early stage for my liking so

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If they pas it's ok. I just hate interviews

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I do the foot in mouth thing when I'm nervous

austere cobalt
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Okay the last interview went really well!

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Yay

austere cobalt
sterile dome
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out of curiosity, what are you using to track them?

austere cobalt
austere cobalt
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Alright so, I got some constructive feedback from one of the interviewers

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Basically this summary hits the nail on the head with regard to my weaknesses

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Overall, I'm glad I was passed, because, I want to work in an environment that wants me

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But I can't help but wish I didn't fail the interview and I didn't have these weaknesses.

sterile dome
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wow that work style thing is very interesting

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that's really good feedback btw, though "leave space and play ball" is a bit ambiguous

austere cobalt
# sterile dome that's really good feedback btw, though "leave space and play ball" is a bit amb...

"TAKES EFFORT
Being able to think about the needs of themselves and others at the same time."

What I'm understanding is the prompt uniquely had me suffering in this way. I was asked to discuss an extremely complex project I worked on while the interviewer drew what I was describing. Truth be told I panicked and just went on rambling while not even looking at the diagram he was drawing because every time I did I got confused. The format was supposed to test my collaboration skills, but I thought it was testing my presentation skills, for some reason, because I was to be going deep on a project from my past.

So instead of hitting the ball, waiting for the response, hitting it back, etc, I just kept swinging my bat hitting ball after ball

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Clearly just a bad time

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I know now more for future interviews and situations to never assume it's one sided presentation. If I'm panicked, I should try to figure out something to do except immediately tackle the problem head on

sterile dome
austere cobalt
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If I had been prepared knowing the goal was for me to actually work with the interviewer to get some naive version of my complex project down on paper

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And not "I talk you draw"

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I think I would have mentally prepped myself to be okay with all that

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I got confused on goals.

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Always align on goals.

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But now I really want to practice my "I talk you draw" skills because that was eye opening

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@cunning spoke would you be willing to practice that with me?

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Maybe after we're both done interviewing in general...I just want more practice "thinking about me and the other person at the same time" practice

cunning spoke
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  • Avoid using pronouns when people ask you a question, you want to draw attention to something. Also dont use a relative indicator either; use a noun.
  • Count to 5 after finishing a thought/communication. People are socially conditioned to respond to different levels of pause.
  • When explaining something have someone parrot back their understanding before moving on.

If people are talking, they arent judging you. Keep that in mind. People like talking.

austere cobalt
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You're not understanding

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This was the interview

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"hey semi, come prepared to talk about a complex project you worked on in detail. Btw, last minute, I am also gonna draw what you're saying."

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...

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So I wasn't aware there was this implicit expectation for me to like, check in with the person who is drawing ?

cunning spoke
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I believe we spoke at length about this yesterday.

austere cobalt
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I don't remember

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Nothing you're saying is making sense to me

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It's not like people asked me a question

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They just said, talk about x

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And I did

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And I thought the goal was for me to describe the whole project

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And they did parrot their understanding back in ways, I saw no problems there

cunning spoke
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I dont want to have to be in the position to defend a jerk.

austere cobalt
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Then why are you?

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I asked you a clear question

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Would you be willing to do an exercise with me while I talk and you draw what I'm talking

cunning spoke
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I care about you, we are friends, and you keep asking me about this so Im responding.

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Sure.

austere cobalt
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That's all I asked

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And he's not a jerk.

cunning spoke
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But seriously, as your friend all that feedback was upseting.

austere cobalt
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That's not the case.

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Well, you're not really understanding

cunning spoke
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I see that.

austere cobalt
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I know logically what my issues are

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I just havent practiced solutions enough

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Key word being practice

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I'm very rarely in a situation where I can practice that

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Like I can do the back and forth thing

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At the same time? It's currently unfathomable

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I know it's just micro context switching

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I need practice

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Having to be attentive to my words and someone else's drawing at the same exact time requires a level of focus, attention, presence, and intention I just have simply no mastery of.

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Not at all.

upper marsh
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(For kicks, I took that and got basically the exact opposite results as you, lol)

austere cobalt
upper marsh
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It seems reasonably ok for something short and free. I've done a much longer paid one before that was better, but not like, that much better

austere cobalt
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Right? It was surprising

upper marsh
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The trick with these is architecting the test so that you don't bias things towards how you view yourself versus what you actually do

austere cobalt
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I answered in the frame of mind after having received some form of objective feedback on my outward behavior I couldn't disagree with.

upper marsh
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The fancy one I took did some magic to return two sets of data, "what your natural set is" and "what you've adapted to in your workplace"

austere cobalt
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Oo nice

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I'm all annoyed because it's like I can't fix myself unless I fuck up first it feels like

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Like I just lack some ability

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To just become this new person

upper marsh
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Anyway, when I read the interview feedback you got, it feels... iffy to me. Like, those things are important, but often it can be thrown off entirely by being in an interview and miscommunication on what's expected. As you said.

austere cobalt
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He's not entirely wrong that it's my weakness.

upper marsh
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If I was seeing that in our hiring committee, I'd argue for a second conversation with someone else, probably

austere cobalt
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However I do agree in another context , I would not struggle with the same exact type of prompt

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Because I can play ball.. I know I can. It's just hard. It's not my native strength. I've put in a ton of practice and reading into switching attention

austere cobalt
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I do want to do better in general. Like when I get panicked, confused, unclear, etc

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I wish I could just become grounded

upper marsh
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Well, adhd certainly doesn't help with the things they had problems with

austere cobalt
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XD that's exactly what went through my head as I pushed down all my pride and smiled through a thank you

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My inner critic was full on "your brain is broken lol"

upper marsh
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It's not broken. It's just different than that person was expecting.

austere cobalt
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Yeah I hear you. I will try to stop wishing I was different and invest some future energy into practicing this kind of thing because unfortunately it does come bite me at work, though it's far less often than whatever I do that makes me shine I guess

sterile dome
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not sure if this is helpful, but i had to explicitly learn and practice controlling ramble as part of CBT *for adhd

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so it's not your fault, but unfortunately something expected of neurotypical people

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at least with this feedback it's clearer that it's something to be practiced and something you can accomplish with practice

austere cobalt
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I did a lot of DBT for emotional regulation, but I thought with this guy it was ok bc he had a rambly style of talking

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Honestly rambling is ok

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The worry is when rambling becomes steamrolling

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That when you lose touch with your audience

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Thinking out loud...can't really get away from that. But I can take more breaks.

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And because of the format I unfortunately remained completely disconnected from the audience

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I became one minded

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On what I was trying to remember about the details of this complex project I worked on like, 6 months ago

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So I know I have vulnerability to become single minded but not like anyone stopped me to say "hey, you're going too fast. Can we slow down" etc

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I've practiced the art of interrupting when I lose connection with the speaker, I think it's more respectful than letting them talk while you can no longer give them your full attention

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I'll Google CBT for rambling too, just to see if there's more there for me to benefit from. But I honestly feel it's an issue with how I get when I'm not grounded if that makes any sense.

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Hard to remain in touch with your audience when you can't see them because they are thumbnails next to a miro board with a picture that was supposed to be representation of what I was saying mind_blown_wow

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All I saw was "okay, so he's hearing and connecting with what I'm saying, but I'm not getting any clarity by looking at what he drew..." <Cue panic>

sterile dome
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i had an interview like that where they were anticipating me to interrupt them, without giving a signal that this was an expectation

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it's entirely possible they were not an optimal interviewer

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but at the same time, the willingness to provide feedback here makes it worth at least considering what their expectations were

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just in case you encounter that sorta thing again

austere cobalt
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I really appreciated it

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Even if it's hard to swallow 😂

austere cobalt
sterile dome
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it can be very frustrating

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cues that we miss

austere cobalt
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Yeah it's why I spent so much time trying to practice mindfulness

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But I still struggle 🙃

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Thanks to you all for supporting me

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If only everyone who had a negative impression of me could inform me of that in a candid, non judgemental, timely, and actionable way. Interviewer had no obligation to do this and I had no obligation to listen, but he saw something in me that was fierce and wanted to continue to striving, the grit, and that was enough for him to want to provide me with this feedback as well. On my side I was so close to just effing off, but I knew that I couldn't waste the opportunity

austere cobalt
sterile dome
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a big part of managing the interjection and oversharing and "always talking about themselves" thing is understanding that a more neurotypical person may not perceive your means of relating with them (sharing or contributing a personal experience or thought that immediately comes to mind) as a means of engagement, but instead a form of competition or absorption of the focus

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my strategy for managing this, when i really need to, is to go out of my way to minimize the amount i share (or do not share) and wait as long as possible until the other party is done

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but this can be rough in interviews where you're expected to interrupt or catch a cue to stop them midway

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works the other way around too—you're prompted to share something and so you do share. you might stop to get some feedback and there is no explicit prompt to stop or change gears or engage in their side, so you begin to feel anxious or worry about whether to continue sharing, until being given a signal that it's their turn

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with this i try to ask whether or not they understand me or if they have any thoughts or questions

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it takes a lot of practice and is not a perfect science. it's really easy to interject or accidentally go over, but i think as long as you make it clear to the other party what your intentions are, it works out ok.

austere cobalt
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@sterile dome dang you have ADHD like me lol but you already got so many great coping strategies that's amazing

proud tide
austere cobalt
austere cobalt
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Idea: If i dont present perfectly in my interview, the likelihood that they will come to understand how i think / work / function will be higher. Thus, reducing the risk if accepting the job if i get an offer, and also, helping filter out companies who might not be okay with my non-strengths

upper marsh
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That is more or less my philosophy with not doing any leetcode (but also, different). I find it makes sense, but also don't advise it to others because I think you have to come to your own decision about it.

austere cobalt
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https://adrianmejia.com/how-to-solve-any-graph-2d-arrays-maze-interview-questions-in-javascript-dfs-vs-bfs/

Adrian Mejia Blog
How to solve any graph/Maze interview questions in JavaScript? DFS ...

Graphs are one of my favorite data structures because you can model many real-life situations with them. Such problems involve finding the shortest paths between 2 or more locations, scheduling courses, finding relationships in family trees, solving mazes, and many more! As a result, it’s ubiquitous in tech interview questions. In this article, ...

austere cobalt
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No offers in hand yet.

But heavily leaning towards a Founding Engineer opportunity.

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Becoming the 4th engineer / employee at a startup seems like a legit situation ngl

upper marsh
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I don't recall, have you done a small company before?

austere cobalt
undone hazel
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semi what are you up to now?

austere cobalt
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I did a few final rounds, I haven't gotten any offers yet but I think I'll get the first two tomorrow.

austere cobalt
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I know all these other companies are gonna be much more competitive on the base pay, but the idea of 0.75% of a company i really believe in, well, i cant help myself

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why should i be the breadwinner in this couple, and not the risk taker? 🙂

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I'll push my hubby to go apply to google when he gets bored enough

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Gonna get ready to hit it out of the park with a huge upside once again, but this time, its mine

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I half wanna accept it right now so i can avoid paying my cobra premium next month but alas

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i wanna get those market-rate offer(s) too so I can have some established base pay for the adjustment after seed funding

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but I feel like I can definitely say i feel like this matches my vibe especially.

austere cobalt
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okay got a second offer!!!

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This one is actually exceeding my expectations for base pay!

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Yay

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Well now idk what to do

sage matrix
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congrats, semi
for me, I feel i need to put breaks on interviewing and get good at doing leetcode first.

proud tide
austere cobalt
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LMAO I really felt like considering it but I want a work life balance not a work work balance

austere cobalt
proud tide
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j2 isnt for working

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strictly an RSU embezzler

sage matrix
austere cobalt
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Ahh makes sense

sage matrix
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I spent so much time for one problem it takes like all day to make sense of it. Feels like i m missing something.

austere cobalt
sage matrix
# austere cobalt What problem was it

trying to revers the linked list, or adding node to end of list.
if you were to do the blind 75, is there an efficient way to do it. or just go one by one. I am doing it by the categories.

austere cobalt
# sage matrix trying to revers the linked list, or adding node to end of list. if you were to...

Reversing a linked list, did that stuff in college, upper grad classes...I haven't had to do that in a leet code yet. I guess with my yoe I didn't have to expend as much time with leetcode. The hardest problem I had to work through was implementing a circular queue in an upper grad algos class, as well as some of the graph and tree problems. Honestly I guess I haven't considered how hard it would be to leet code without a background in it.. so I'd recommend by combining working through problems on your own with setting a time limit and looking at and understanding other solutions out there..

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Like I distinctively don't understand the point of some leetcode besides brute force memorization of countless tricks and techniques.

sage matrix
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hmm.. true, its really hard to come with novel solution. if i were to just look up the solution and understand I can do 3 or 4 problems a day.

austere cobalt
austere cobalt
austere cobalt
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Going to likely accept my asap without further negotiation and when it's all said and done notify the other company that ive accepted.

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I cancelled the remainder of my inflight and unfinished interview processes.

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I'm way too burnt out to care about them when I have my dream offer in hand already

#

There are only two downsides

  • time difference. They're in CA and I'm in NJ. I know it'll be necessary for me to practice self restraint when I need to prioritize my life while work is ongoing
  • super deep frontend problems, which means less ability to work on backend problems. I wanted my next position to let me flex between FE and BE but if I was choosing between Staff Frontend and Senior Fullstack, I knew I would be picking staff
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I do not think I can achieve a staff fullstack at my current level of experience and expertise

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But I do believe I can maybe even progress to principal engineer with the current trajectory, and take as much or as little time as I need to explore all the edges of the stack

sage matrix
austere cobalt
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its already 20k over my target. I'm happy to move forward with it.

#

over 30% increase from my position as a senior engineer in my last, similarly sized, but dissimilarly managed company.

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I just cant conceptualize why I'd negotiate a high ball offer

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Maybe I tend to be complacent but I don't need to negotiate for the sake of it. If I'm happy I'm happy.

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If it was like, lower than target I would

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But I think it's generous and exactly what I desired

undone hazel
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@austere cobalt where did you end up accepting and what location?

austere cobalt
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so I'll be doing that today

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🤞

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but regardless, the offer i want to accept is in California

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the deadline to accept is tomorrow but I'm going to write back today and ask for another offer letter that has my start date bumped up and the deadline pushed to monday so i can confirm more things

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I wanted to start sooner than the 25th and my prospective manager was very ok with that

undone hazel
austere cobalt
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I used notion to track my whole job search

austere cobalt
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Third offer incoming tomorrow

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TOMORROW IS D DAY

austere cobalt
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Where is it

austere cobalt
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Obviously don't wanna doxx myself so I'm tryna not to share all the details but yeah

sage matrix
austere cobalt
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I brushed up on leetcode.

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I have 8-10 yoe so I'm being tested on skills that show I can build products and make them come to life

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You have to be careful because some companies don't want you to parrot back leetcode answers

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The interviews I did best on were intentionally designed to test for my relevant skills only. And that's why I got them offers

sage matrix
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hmm.. I guess at my level (2-3 year exp) thats all they care about

austere cobalt
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It's weird to me tbh

hollow rose
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Good luck on your search buddy

austere cobalt
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Okay final update for all here!!

I got one more offer. The offer was for a smaller startup. 200k base, 30k sign on. They tried to aslo gift me a large tub of cold brew...still haven't decided if I'm going to accept that..haha

I told the other company's recruiter the situation and they bumped up my base and my stock a bit so I accepted. I start on Monday!

hollow rose
austere cobalt
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To complicate the matters my husband and I wanna fly to Florida and crash at our in-laws for the week ...I'm trying to figure out how to do it so it doesn't interfere with my work !! I could have pushed back the start date but I wanna start now ;_;

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I'm thinking a 7 pm fly out on Tuesday and come back on Sunday. And then explain to a lot of people "yeah I'm working from Florida this week! I'll be in my home office next week"

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But idk if that is kewl

hollow rose
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Should be okay as it's mostly induction stuff, best to let them know I reckon

austere cobalt
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We were gonna plan this trip weeks ago but after the hurricane it was unclear

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Yeah , lemme ask

austere cobalt
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Alright email sent

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I feel good about being open and honest about stuff out the gate 😌

upper marsh
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I would normally encourage you to just take that time, but I know how exciting it can be to start a new job, and with a long search like this one. Remember to take care of yourself: it'll be a lot, mentally, to take in as you're getting used to new things, and I personally have a hard time not just burning myself to the ground trying to do everything immediately when I'm excited. Pace yourself 🙂

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And congratulations! I'm happy to see this, and I hope you enjoy it

austere cobalt
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I got the OK to work from Florida!! I don't want to take the extra time because I already signed it with the start on date as Monday xD

I think I'd be too bored and I kinda love the idea of taking my first work week in a location with a beach to go relax at ...

I feel like by default I'ma have to take the first week a little bit easy cuz I'll be traveling and in Florida. It might set me up on a good pace then because I won't be grinding from the start!

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Basically it will set me on the right foot because I think if it wasn't for Florida I'd want to spend my first week working 9-9 out of excitement.

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Glad I have something that will help me divide my attention and then I won't have the inertia of overwork

austere cobalt
proud tide
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gz

proper wyvern
stuck hemlock
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i have adhd too!

glad it worked out

austere cobalt
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I am 2 weeks into my unemployment. I have paperwork i need to do, things i need to figure out, projects i want to work on, studying I need to do. Part of my brain wants to procrastinate forever. I'm not sure if this is relevant to this sub but there is so much emotional onboarding for me to do this...I could use some support!

I'm primarily a Frontend Engineer but I have Fullstack experience as well. I'll be preparing to get an L5/L6 level role. I have 8YOE of FTE experience and 2 full additional years of co-ops. I have not updated my resume...I'm recovering from burnt out and mental health issues. I'm getting cold feet on starting my search.

I have a lot of paperwork I need to do...and once it's done and all my stuff is figured out for unemployment/insurance/payments etc...I'll need to hit this hard i guess?

But i also want to develop a side project (social media site) to build my ideal arhcitecture/stack for fun, and i have a friend's startup im working on too...so i dk how to manage my time.

And it is summer and i want to utilize my pool a ton. Anyway, please join my post if you can relate and help support me in my search! I will post any and all updates I come across here.

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@barren chasm figured i ping u here too

barren chasm
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What are you energized by most right now? There’s no need to immediate hop back into the train, especially if you feel like one of the first things you’d want to do is take vacation anyway. It’s ok to be lazy for a while, it’ll let you unwind, reset, and you’ve earned it

austere cobalt
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people...sigh

static orbit
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I'm now at the end of a more than 1 year long break, similar ideas to yours, though not as much paperwork. Ended up not doing any of the projects, but I don't feel bad for that.

austere cobalt
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oh wow! 1 year break that sounds nice.

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@static orbit im still early, so once i figure out my insurance, getting paid back for various benefits / my FSA, and unemployment im a free woman haha

austere cobalt
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im trying to do what gives me energy as @barren chasm said

austere cobalt
static orbit
austere cobalt
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I'm trying to make it 3 months max for similar reasons

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Day 11...trying to keep myself accountable

static orbit
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do note that even if you have a specific timeline in mind, the job hunting part can take a very random amount of time

austere cobalt
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I'm just going to think positively about landing a job in that timeframe

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But I want to go to big N

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The 3 months is the max amount of time I'd spend before I make looking for a new job my full time job hahaha

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It starts being my part time job this week tho

barren chasm
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Is there a timeline where you want to be in a job? Do you want to go full remote now or back to the city?

austere cobalt
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Full remote with hybrid option / office in NYC (I will eventually be able to do more in person when I want to level up, but I have too much of my own medical stuff going on to give up remote first)

Timeline is by or around Fall because I'll get into seasonal depression if I don't have a job by then likely. I do like working, I just need a break.

austere cobalt
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Today's update

  • Talked to some folks from various companies. The goal is to land a Senior or Staff Frontend role for high TC. Ideally top company for the experience boost but I'm seeing some attractive emails in my inbox for staff roles at startups. It's unlikely for me to be able to get a staff level at a top N company.
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I have to finalize some of my paperwork from my old employer ,..and the next step for me is resume .. hopefully will make progress on the resume tomorrow 🤞

austere cobalt
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Today's update

I found a job posting for Google I want to shoot for & worked on self care

austere cobalt
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Today's update

I started thinking about my resume and found some resources. I'm confused about some of the finer details of how to write my resume.

fathom forge
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Career cup has good resume info

cold ginkgo
austere cobalt
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Gonna make my resume Monday! I have a few job postings I'm interested in applying to from FAANG

distant coral
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How did you get on? Also got ADHD @austere cobalt

austere cobalt
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I decided to put the whole job search on hold to prioritize getting a startup off the ground! I had to get back on medication, frankly. The first 3.5 weeks i couldnt bring myself to do anything useful. But my friend has been pushing himself for months to get this product done and its on the last leg now. Once it's flying, my focus shifts. I also was able to agree with my husband to extend my break through September if i need to. This relieved a lot of pressure as my top priority is recooping and rebuilding a life i can enjoy

austere cobalt
fresh aurora
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Oh wow its u Semi !!! Keep going ur a role model 🙌🏼

austere cobalt
austere cobalt
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I definitely have many recruiters in my inbox I want to start replying to!! Tomorrow I will create my resume and come up with some kind of a plan and timeline for studying

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I screwed up with my insurance sadly so I have to look into that

urban forge
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@austere cobalt I was in similar situation. I am leading a big team of 20 people as a Technical Lead/EM and I was burning out. On top of that I wanted to work on my own side project and other shiny things. I also suspect I have ADHD but not sure yet. The good thing is my job doesn't suck and I'm proud of the things I do at my job. I might quit the job sometime later, but at least I'm not suffocating here.

What helped me:
I took a month long break and went deep into the Himalaya. Staying away from the world gave me some clarity and helped me understand what matters and what doesn't. I started writing a journal and changed my environment to make it easier me to break bad habits. E.g. I use a eInk tablet to write my thoughts and use my computer only to work. I also go to the office to work and disconnect when I'm done at the end of the day. Finally I also told the CTO that I can't manage these many people and they'll find another lead to reduce the load. I'm also planning to join the Tibetan meditation group and I hope it helps.

austere cobalt
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I find this really helpful. I'm too fearful to do a big trip like that and I feel pretty addicted to the internet. It's 10:35 and I have no intention to stop scrolling TikTok hahahah -_-

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I would totally go on a beautiful trip like that with my husband perhaps.

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But how would I keep myself away from my phone

urban forge
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I feel you, the dopamine kick is a terrible addiction. I sometimes hate what we've created. I wish there was a easier way to kick it. One thing I tried was to use an old phone with only iMessages in it so that my spouse can reach me. I would then go for a walk at a lake nearby to clear my thoughts.

austere cobalt
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Why get out of bed when the bed has everything lol so true.

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I have a gorgeous pool, I will go outside and sit beside it and enjoy breakfast and clear my head.

urban forge
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You need to make an effort, you need to take a call on continuing with TikTok and other dopamine sinks.

austere cobalt
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Maybe I could get one of those apps that tracks my time and puts limits on things ?

upper marsh
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Also useful: Kitchen Safe Time Locking Container (Medium), Timed Lock Box for Cell Phones, Snacks, and other unwanted temptations (White Lid + 5.5” Clear Base) https://a.co/4b3JVnD

Kitchen Safe Time Locking Container (Medium), Timed Lock Box for Ce...

The kitchen safe is the time-lock container designed to help us fight temptations. USA today and time magazine call it "brilliant!" here's how it works: 1) place an item in the kitchen safe 2) rotate the button to set the timer (from 1 minute to 10 days) 3) press the button to activate the lock o...

urban forge
austere cobalt
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Unfortunately I'm using an android

urban forge
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There's this great book from Cal Newport called Digital Minimalism. It talks about some strategies on dealing with this

austere cobalt
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Part of me wants to go in the opposite direction and become some kind of productivity steamer lol

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I'm so extroverted -_-

urban forge
austere cobalt
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Mostly just lack of know how and confidence

urban forge
austere cobalt
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True .. hehe I like the ideas 💡

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Today im just coping by journaling

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I made it off TikTok and finally ready to like eat and make a to-do list

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But today's most important task is sorting out cobra why my insurance isn't working

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I'm out of a bunch of meds and I think that's causing my additional stress bc I caused this to myself haha

urban forge
austere cobalt
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Hopefully I can get cobra sorted! Slowly start to make progress on other things too

urban forge
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what's Cobra?

austere cobalt
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It's the health insurance continuation thingy

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I have a lot of medical conditions so I thought it would be best to continue my coverage with cobra

urban forge
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Ah ok

austere cobalt
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Ofc nothing can ever be seamless

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I'm also reading the book @upper marsh recommended on non violent communication bc I sadly have seen myself fall pray to violent communication all too frequently and I'm tired of the toll it's taken on me and my relationships

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I try to read / focus on self development more than the quick dopamine hits

urban forge
austere cobalt
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This one

urban forge
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Ah this one, I got in my library already 🙂

austere cobalt
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unfortunately, i believe im a violent communicator.

fathom forge
austere cobalt
austere cobalt
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OK so all the places i was eyeing are in hiring freezes LOL...

Ima pivot. Good news: That means i can avoid Leetcode! bad news: TC wont be as high. Will aim for similar base (190+)

I am so stressed abt making a resume but the emails rolling in show me the market is still hot. I dk if its worth the headache to shoot for FAANG when they are slowing down their hiring.