Corroded Destiny

[unique patrol]

I still suck at these

[static pecan]

Hm, she looks less like nightmare fuel now, good job!

Also HOLY SHIT SHE'S CASTING FIREBALL GET BACK

[unique patrol]

Even worse. Acidball

[steady whale]

Looks like you’re improving though

[unique patrol]

I guess?

[steady whale]

Tip: don’t fully line the thighs/knees

[unique patrol]

got it

[naive radish]

Low tier Noita Spell really

[unique patrol]

Who you are calling low tier? I am at least a mid tier warrior!

[steady whale]

Try taking away these lines :3

Trust meeee

Oh ignore the bottom right redline that was a mistake lol

[steady whale]

Instantly more scuggy

I would remove the shading where the lines were too :3

[unique patrol]

i refuse

[steady whale]

Haha okay!

Just my suggestion :3c

Your scugs are improving rapidly

[unique patrol]

just a sketch

pissed off radioactive mascot banana is funky to draw

[inner steeple]

The top two: POV: you are Sky

[unique patrol]

Stop slandering best dad Sky

[steady whale]

Truly one of the dads of all time

[unique patrol]

First child he actually cares about and not sends to Gales for trauma treatment. Give him a break

[woven cedar]

he is sending her to Gale for treatment tho, just not for the scug

[unique patrol]

Never change a running system

[static pecan]

No, he is sending her to Gales for trauma

[unique patrol]

Realized his new method of raising was missing the hunted expression in Irradiants face. Gotta fix that with his trademark trauma

[static pecan]

It's more efficient if they get trauma while already headed to their destination

[unique patrol]

10 min frustation sketch.

Some of these calculations are easy as fuck after figuring them out ... but I just can't.
... mechanical process engineering will be a massacre

[naive radish]

cue Sky in a scug costume trying to wawa

[unique patrol]

Found a beginning for chapter 15 of Corroded Destiny

[steady whale]

!!!

[unique patrol]

The chapter won't release before next week Friday, but it is good to have the beginning already

[static pecan]

Any progress is good progress amirite?

[unique patrol]

Yep

Teaser:

We will get to know the current Chieftain this chapter. His name is 'Commanding Ocean Tides'
All Scavengers of that tribe will have water related names

[static pecan]

||But will they fight? ||

[unique patrol]

It is planned, when, that is a different story.
Well, you will see why I won't let them brawl it out immediately

[static pecan]

Oh also I forgot to mention, very ironic naming scheme

[unique patrol]

The wave breaker will change the course

[unique patrol]

quick low quality concept sketch regarding next chapter

does it look good? Ehhhhh...it gets the point across I think

[inner steeple]

Garbage heap beloved

[unique patrol]

The king of nothing

[static pecan]

king of nothing??? Damn, this is just like risk of rain 2

[unique patrol]

Or Jo-Jo

[unique patrol]

A few days of inactiveness and you already vanish from the list, tsk tsk.

There is something small coming soon, but it still takes a small bit. A teaser

[static pecan]

It's write or uhh... be written off? /j

[static pecan]

She looks repulsed by it

[unique patrol]

She is not the one holding it :3

[static pecan]

Breaker's back???

[unique patrol]

That picture has not that much to do with CD I am afraid. Look at the colors

Stay patient

[static pecan]

Uh one sec

Uhh I can't find any iterator with just red and cyan wires so i'm gonna guess it's ||FLU, LttM or some other iterator||

Guess #2 makes little sense but I do recall something with her wires

[unique patrol]

You saw the other character only a bit ago

The character is a cutie

[static pecan]

Latest characters are either irradiant or the other scav, hm

Excuse me as my internet is currently on life support so it might work and then die for a while

[static pecan]

whisper?

Hm, though she does not have such a cloak, which makes me kinda think sky?

[unique patrol]

Patience :3

[unique patrol]

Trauma buds with their glowing solutions.
Featuring Crowns from #1236753481000550554 message

[naive radish]

Pretty!!

[unique patrol]

Experimented a bit with colors here as one can see

[naive radish]

Orange and Blue do go well together 😄 . Soft glows are cozy

[unique patrol]

This scene portraits one ability of the staff I haven't mentioned yet. Given it contains a miniature rarefaction cell, Gales can induce a very temporarily low gravity field in her most immediate surroundings at the cost of her newfound stamina reserves.

[naive radish]

Coool

[sterile briar]

that looks so good!!!

[sterile briar]

yes they do! orange and blue is the best color combination out their, no other one

[steady whale]

It looks really nice

[unique patrol]

Thanks y'all

[inner steeple]

SOULWING...... THIS IS BEAUTIFUL DUDE. The glowing colors. The reflections! The trauma buddies have found a way to meet each other 😌

Thank you

[mental cosmos]

Crossover fic?

[inner steeple]

Not at this point in time, I believe, though the possibility stands

[unique patrol]

A crossover certainly is possible after CD reached a certain point :3

[unique patrol]

I put all my elbow grease into it. Felt inspired ^^

Wonder why

[unique patrol]

Still overjoyed with how good that pic turned out to be :3

Oh, also. Tomorrow morning is my last exam. After that I will continue writing on CD

[static pecan]

[sterile briar]

we're so close to being back

[unique patrol]

the next chapter will be fun :3

[unique patrol]

First 1000 words of the next chapter written

[static pecan]

Yooooo

[harsh abyss]

Sorry if I’ve been neglecting all of this, I’m going through a lot rn.

[unique patrol]

No worries. Take all the time you require to sort it out

[unique patrol]

1800 words now

[static pecan]

We are so back

[steady whale]

CD incoming…

[unique patrol]

Yep

[unique patrol]

2300 words. Time for sleep

[unique patrol]

No clue if that looks even remotely decent

[static pecan]

only a spoonful

That's the drone thingy i assume?

[unique patrol]

yep

essencially that unisghtly blob with a soolid vision skin draped over. Issue.
Solid vision. I want the drone to be visible...

[static pecan]

Make it slightly glitchy or transparent maybe?

[sterile briar]

the drone without the hologram looks as if its getting ready to force feed me some soup on a sick day

[unique patrol]

Hahahaha

[unique patrol]

I tried. The lineart is messing everything up

[static pecan]

Well, this might be an issue, then

[steady whale]

You can make the lineart transparent too? The base lineart(the one under the hologram) stays solid, color and everything, then draw the transparent hologram color and lineart over and make it transparent

[unique patrol]

I have a solution

Traditional to the rescue

Funfact. I am currently stranded here in the train with a sketchbook, a pencil and a dream.
No eraser.
Every line here is a first take

It has its errors, but under these conditions it is decent I guess

[static pecan]

Looking good

[unique patrol]

@steady whale Does this look better?

[steady whale]

Yes!!!

[unique patrol]

Great :3

[unique patrol]

Another sketch for chapter 15, same no eraser conditions hence the strange legs.
Meet the chieftain

[inner steeple]

Drip

The gold string chains will go so well with this guy's blue

[unique patrol]

Blue and gold, never wrong

[unique patrol]

Too tired. 200 more words down, but now I have to sleep.
The chapter is developing nicely. I expect something about 3500 words, probably a bit less

[wet cedar]

keep it up, man. You’re killing it.

[unique patrol]

I hope it will be worth the wait :3

[static pecan]

"After 9 years in development, hopefully it was worth the wait" /j /ref

[unique patrol]

Who had the bright idea again?

Oh right, me

First image for chapter 15 is finished. 1.5 more will follow

You I will finish later

[static pecan]

whisper lookin kinda weird today lmao

[static pecan]

uh are their heights to scale?

[unique patrol]

Yes

Breaker is a giant

Or has at least decent legs :p

[sterile briar]

chieftain is small, for that he needs to be replaced

[unique patrol]

Small but intimidating

[sterile briar]

nahhhh, i bet i could kick that guy with ease

[inner steeple]

Ocean without the mask is even SHORTER - I can't take this guy seriously /j

[static pecan]

Breaker to Ocean must be like "I can't hear you from up here"

[unique patrol]

Hehehe. I think you will enjoy the interactions between Red and blue :3

[unique patrol]

Cooking time. Will finish this up after dinner

[steady whale]

Lookin good

[static pecan]

If they are gonna fight this might be interesting

[sterile briar]

at least someone spent there time drawing something more- actual good
stares at banan

also is it just me or did the guy shrink even more?

[static pecan]

Seems roughly the same

[sterile briar]

im telling you. that guy against me, i wold beat him with ease and no weapons at all

[inner steeple]

Breaker ain't skipping leg day

[unique patrol]

hehe

[static pecan]

But what's your frame of reference for the size of things?

[sterile briar]

that guy is not higher then my waist for sure

one kick and he is in outer space

[steady whale]

It’s not my fault? You asked how you could repent

You’re the patron saint of moon x beans anyway… I don’t see any other fics

[steady whale]

The power of squats

[sterile briar]

what did i even do again, i forgot

[steady whale]

I don’t remember but you sure did it

[sterile briar]

if you dont even remmeber it couldnt have been worthy for repenting

[steady whale]

Your sins are forgiven

[unique patrol]

oh also. Notice Breaker's pearls. In the last image of his all his pearls had the same color :3

[static pecan]

Cause he ||got the colored ones from gales||, ye?

[unique patrol]

Indeed :3

[unique patrol]

Enough for tonight. Tomorrow I will shade Ocean and finish writing the last sections of the chapter

[inner steeple]

(chanting) CD CD CD CD
Me receiving a new game CD ROM as a kid 😂

[unique patrol]

Art for chapter 15 is done :3
Now I only have to write the last lines

[static pecan]

[unique patrol]

I think

Yes, I can end the chapter here.

3500 words

[unique patrol]

https://archiveofourown.org/works/55635643/chapters/146524594

Chapter 15 of Corroded Destiny. We are so back!

[static pecan]

[steady whale]

CD is back!!!

[static pecan]

Chieftan's short build is pointed out in the 2nd paragraph right away

[static pecan]

And testing his resolve?

Must have had something?

Stories of the chieftan?

Why is "To" capitalized?

Ocean Tides' nod? Also, "scrap heap of a throne" I believe

Comma after "included"

I'd put a comma after "deaths"

Another comma after "rookies", I think?

I'd switch "felt" and "Lives" around

I have to go do sth, i'll send the rest later

[unique patrol]

I will review them in one go after you returned.
Thanks ^^

[static pecan]

A comma after "discovery" maybe?

I think you should throw out the "A" at the beggining and keep the rest as is ("Heat that would...") or convert the beggining to "Such heat would be..."

"Which led(?) to Lives' Heart Chamber lit up"

I'd move "all over its body" to after "abilities"

Imo "as well" to after "purpose". "would" to after "screen"

Comma after "Whisper" maybe?

"were" to after "legs"

Maybe move "as we speak" to the end of its sentence?

Isn't it "closed in on"?

"Lives' backlog"?

"they would bestow"

Comma after "with that" maybe?

Gonna spellcheck the note as well

"who's back"

Okay that's about it i think

[inner steeple]

Speaking of, First Whisper still has that pear 😂

[static pecan]

What could be inside the pear? Could it be yummy nutrition?

[inner steeple]

Nutrience... for ||a time when all seems lost... it's all coming together||

[unique patrol]

Pears are the pearls of the gods :3

Ok, time to spellcheck, thanks Piotr

[unique patrol]

Not anymore

[inner steeple]

No more emergency food for Whisper

[static pecan]

Munch on the pearl

[unique patrol]

All errors fixed

I hope you all enjoyed the read ^^

[static pecan]

Yeah

[sterile briar]

soul, noooooo! you cant drop a chapter while im it writers hell, now i have to read it instead of work

[unique patrol]

You see, there is the problem. I can

[sterile briar]

help, im being threatened with good stories, pls someone save me from this cruelty

[unique patrol]

[unique patrol]

This chapter has only one problem

Where to go from here?
I mean the main mini arc is set, ||which will be Breaker's second encounter with Gales||, but I am running out of side stories to set into the second parts. I have however one for that next chapter at least. But from that point .... hmm...

[static pecan]

something with ||suns, or maybe the meeting, or sth?||

[unique patrol]

Hmm

I know already what the next mini arc will be, so I will spare me an ||Irradiant|| focus until then.
Next one has a bit ||Sky research reflections written on it, the one after ... I think I want to give suns and spear a bit more time before the focus.|| after that we will see.
...
The meeting .... ohhhh, yeah, that might be quite interesting! Good idea, Piotr

[woven cedar]

Caught up!
CD is back with a calm, slow breezy pace chapter, but I expect things will become galeful soon

[woven cedar]

Hmm, I do hope we will have more info on SG's certain insidious problem...

[unique patrol]

We will. Given the current arc will include gales sooner or later, this might be the case :3

[unique patrol]

Quick and messy concept sketch of a chapter 16 scenery.

[static pecan]

lizors

[unique patrol]

I just can't draw them

[static pecan]

they look solid

better than the first iterations of irradiant /lh

[unique patrol]

you are living dangerously

[inner steeple]

LIZORS
Green scav looks so worried as if fearing Breaker is going to roast them

[unique patrol]

Pff

Meanwhile no thoughts in green‘s lizor

[inner steeple]

It really just said oWo

[static pecan]

A single glance and his brain will blow up

[unique patrol]

Funny triple number acquired

[unique patrol]

First 400 words of chapter 16 done. I have an idea what I want, now I only need the mind to follow it

[inner steeple]

Soulwing PINK!!

[unique patrol]

Only till the 8th. Nitro trial version :p

[unique patrol]

Slowly but surely.
Am now at 1000 words. Took a break yesterday and drew something small for my own setting.

[unique patrol]

Writing this chapter I do realize that I might will run into a problem in the future.

My forte is writing dialogues or scenes in an enclosed space. Given the second part of CD will follow the pilgrimage of Gales, it will really test my mettle by forcing me to write more mobile scenes … oh boy.

[static pecan]

write scenes while Gales is in a shelter

[unique patrol]

logbook entries :3
Today I encountered x. What a fascinating phenomenon. X could mean in the grand spectrum of the cycle Y, which means theory Z could prove to be not as far-fetched as I initially thought. Have to discuss it with Lives at the next possible chance.

Means a pilgrimage in a retold manner that switches to active storytelling at critical locations and/or at interesting encounters

I like that

[static pecan]

"Personal log, cyle 7
Scavenger :)
End log"

[unique patrol]

Personal log, cycle 268.
Feet hurt.
End log

[unique patrol]

First of the three perspectives of the chapter done. 1300 words. ||Breaker done, now to Gales :3||
But first. Sleep.

[unique patrol]

Quick 600 words broadcast to start the day ;3

[unique patrol]

That’s a shame …

Lost the file. Pc went byebye.

Eh. Was not the most inspired sketch either way

This is what the program restored.
Oh well

[steady whale]

Noooo that sucks so bad

It looked so good!

I’m sure it will that look good again but now more work…

[unique patrol]

I deleted the file.

Wasn't happy with the pose in the first place

[inner steeple]

Gone'd

[steady whale]

It do be like that sometimes

[unique patrol]

I said I would do something after a quick nap.
...
The nap was two hours longer than anticipated.
...
Regardless, I sat down and wrote. From 1900 words to now 2800 words. Now I can sleep, now I was useful.
New chapter tomorrow? Maybe! Depends on my ability to finish a drawing.

[steady whale]

Good job. BED!!

[unique patrol]

Yesyes

[unique patrol]

Chapter is done and as a draft on AO3.

Let's see if I can finish a corresponding picture till y'all wake up to read it.
Will post it later today.

[static pecan]

Yippie

[unique patrol]

https://archiveofourown.org/works/55635643/chapters/146923495

Chapter 16 time! The corrosion is real and melty.
Oh, and more Scav time :3

[static pecan]

when the destiny is corroded

bad time to be gaming

[unique patrol]

I present you the red and the blue pill (...)

[woven cedar]

take both

[unique patrol]

Another loss to overdose

Chapter art. I half assed it, my apologies

[woven cedar]

Consumed! gave some thought, but I have no speculations this time

[unique patrol]

Good thoughts. Thanks for attending

[unique patrol]

Just a quick little sketch

[compact niche]

Lovely!

[unique patrol]

"Everything is failing, especially me"

[static pecan]

||"You can't just blow a hole into the surface of underhang"||

I'd put a comma after "breaker"

Another comma after "cyans"

I'd start a new sentence after "however", and a comma after "time"

Comma after "here"?

Another comma after "wounds"?

This middle sentence is ehhhh? Throw out "that", one of the solutions i see maybe?

Here get rid of either "after" or "later". Also, "Gales' leg"

Comma after "hope"?

Another comma after "be"?

||can't wait for breaker to commit DIY demolition work ||

[unique patrol]

Aight, fixed

Ten hits left to a round 2000

[unique patrol]

https://archiveofourown.org/works/55635643/chapters/146923495

Just to make the most recent the current chapter again.
In case someone missed it :3

[inner steeple]

CONSUMED
||Ahhh so in the pic you showed me, are the warning symbols pointing out the scavs? Would make sense as they're steadily approaching the puppet||
||Also you missed ANOTHER pear oh my god, this never fails to amuse me ||

[unique patrol]

Coloured pears are a delicacy:3

[unique patrol]

Also not quite. ||The warning symbols are pointing out the critical points. Maybe Gales want someone there to ... discretely get rid of the problem ||

Wait...

Blast!

@steady whale Switching log and text around caused a dilemma I just now realized
Gotta exterminate yet another small section and drag it in chapter 17.
||Talking about the walking stick before she knows about it ...||

Or...I just squeeze it inbetween the log ... hmm

[steady whale]

Woops

Stick happens

[static pecan]

Oh right I was thinking about that but then I went "eh, I must be seeing stuff"

[static pecan]

God damn it I missed it again...

||i'm gonna pretend this is a running joke and ignored it on purpose ||

[unique patrol]

Figured out a solution

[unique patrol]

New section to replace the ||staff|| mention

[static pecan]

Gales the pear farmer

[unique patrol]

Expanded the initial section a tiny bit to reference the new section and placed it here.

What do you think?

[unique patrol]

Wha??

You didn't just speedrun that!?

[inner steeple]

[static pecan]

"There are worlds between" btw

[static pecan]

...
||now what about whisper and her pear? ||

[inner steeple]

||HUGS FOR ALL ||

[inner steeple]

CD shitpost eaters are eating good tonight

God you can see it through the spoiler blur

[unique patrol]

You broke the soul

[inner steeple]

Excellent

[static pecan]

Unknown content? It's full of nutrients!

[inner steeple]

Only the finest radiation-

[unique patrol]

"What in the Void Fluid's damnation, Eyes!? First you build me without a mouth and then you gift me something to eat? Am I a joke to you, administrator!?"

[static pecan]

Time to keep it till some slugcat walks by

[unique patrol]

Drymm™️'s origins of the Irradiant

[static pecan]

The bioengineering grid is a pear-feeding machine

THE FIRST PEAR-CENTRIC FIC, LADIES AND GENTLEMEN

[unique patrol]

A pear for your thoughts

[inner steeple]

Probably better fare than the spicy slop Sky gave her

[static pecan]

Slop 🤮
Yummy tasty pear 😋

[unique patrol]

Go easy on Sky.
He is a chef with a limited sense of smell and no sense of taste

And no care in the world

[static pecan]

I'll buff out, mental well-being? What's that?

[unique patrol]

Something Gales is more than happy to fix

(One hit away from 2000 hits!)

[static pecan]

Hmm i wonder if I can just...

[wet cedar]

I still need to read the new chapter, as a matter of fact

[unique patrol]

[static pecan]

Anyway time for me to go cya fellas

[unique patrol]

Have a good sleep

[wet cedar]

Read it! Good chapter. I put my thoughts into a comment on AO3. ||I don’t trust those two scavs traveling with Breaker…||

[unique patrol]

A wonderful sight

[unique patrol]

Don't give me ideas >:3

[sterile briar]

congrats man, well deserved

[mental cosmos]

What is that?

[sterile briar]

alcoholic surviour

[wet cedar]

||It’s a long way up an Iterator and a long, long, way down… if someone wanted to remove a political rival, hard to get more removed than his lizard ‘slipping’ at a very inopportune moment ||

[unique patrol]

You sir have a rotten mind. ||Of course the far better solution is to remove the source of influence. The Scavs are loaded with bombs after all. What is a chosen without a god? ||

[wet cedar]

Disastrously short-sighted. ||I like it.||

[unique patrol]

Decided to give my first image of Shifting Gales a slight upgrade due to reasons

Left is the new version, this time with the neuron brain and better shading

And three phalanges at the staff hand instead of four x.x

[inner steeple]

Reasons :3

[unique patrol]

Reasons!
Thanks so much, Drymm, for piecing the layers together

[wet cedar]

this is sick

[unique patrol]

IKR?

[inner steeple]

Gasp, abusing mod powers for your own gain!!! 😤 😤

/j

[wet cedar]

why did we sign up for these powers if not to abuse them?

[unique patrol]

The sheer power at my fingertips.

Heavy voice: All it takes ... is one press of a finger.

[mental cosmos]

Pull the lever, Kronk!

[unique patrol]

Wrong levaaaaa!

[static pecan]

Hm. Spiky legs.

[unique patrol]

Them useless spikes

[unique patrol]

Wrote a bit on chapter 17. Added 600 new words and am now at 1200. It is gales time. I am so stoked to finally write her again ^^

[compact niche]

[unique patrol]

Hm?

[unique patrol]

another 600 words added. I am on a roll.
Now how to go on from here ...

[unique patrol]

Lil wip about the faaaaaar future. Click at your own risk.

[static pecan]

||uh is sky doing what i think he's doing?||

[steady whale]

[inner steeple]

AAAAA

[steady whale]

Surely not

[unique patrol]

He is not known for finishing a thought

[static pecan]

so just how far into the future are we talking about?

[unique patrol]

It is still an idea. And no, ||What you see here is not him crossing himself out||, it is something else :3
Far enough

[static pecan]

||is he the one to figure it out?||

[unique patrol]

||I will just say it has parallels to the Neuron Brain||

[static pecan]

huh well that's odd

[unique patrol]

||The saga of Daedalus and Icarus but with the change that Icarus listens||

[woven cedar]

||'Ascension' but not Ascension? ||
|| Must be WiFi ||

[unique patrol]

||To feel the pull, to finally know that the direction is right.
But not interested to fully give in.||

||Sky never sought glory in all his life. Heck, his primary function was to work towards the scientists or Iterators, that used his upgradable vicinity to test out theories. He was from the beginning a vessel, a tool. And his personality seeks no fulfilment, only purpose. If someone can use his ideas, he is glad.

He will never show it, but he is very proud of Whisper's neuron brain. Because she used what he prepared.

His loner self and reclusiveness as mentioned in First Whisper originates from that lack of glory seeking. He is used to people approaching him and giving him directions what they want. He will do as such and return with results, no further questions asked. Thats how it was with the Ancients and thats how it now is with the Iterators.||

[woven cedar]

|| in a way that sounds melancholic, but Sky himself might not feel so. if that's what gives him contentment, then it's his right to have that. But hopefully someone does give him a hand first, then it's his choice to what extent he wish to reach back.||
||And I wonder would that make him less attach to karma 5? to have no ambition of his own, to have malleable sense of self. does that make him capable to reach X easier? hmm||

[static pecan]

... yeah I still don't know what's going on

[unique patrol]

||Certainly a possibility. Who knows. Has be a weak grip on survival because he has no deeper goal that pushes him forward. Using his ingenuity only selflessly for the gain of others. Providing ideas and leads but lack the commitment to pull through.

In a sense we can already see that with how he purposes Irradiant. Without the commitment for an end goal given to him by Whisper and Suns he would just go as he always did. Do the bare minimum and hope for someone else to lead his will to pull through. The antisocial needs social aid to be the best he can be. (Kinda like me)

As for the picture. Imagine him finding a way to replicate the triple affirmative, but installing limitations so that he can't pull through. Just to grasp enough to confirm that the lead is the correct one.||

[static pecan]

||so what, he's gonna check it and then what? Just gonna let others do the dirty work? Keep it to himself?||

[unique patrol]

||Present the groundwork for the theory to the sliverists he is after all a part of||

[static pecan]

||lazy bastard /j||

[unique patrol]

Pff

[unique patrol]

I will just say so much. Pairing him up with Suns has its reasons.
... and introducing Suns to Gales is the seasoning factor for what I have planned with Approaching Sky.

[unique patrol]

Spoilers: Text and image.
||A cautious taste of the Triple Affirmative from someone who doesn't want to commit.
Held back by the shackles of his own design, Sky takes a sample of his attempt to mimic SoS' solution.
Just to get an idea if he is on the right path, to hand off the design of salvation to those, who truly require it.||

[unique patrol]

@inner steeple did the beautiful moving edit again. Looks simply perfect 😍

[inner steeple]

And it loops smoothly :3

[unique patrol]

It does :3

And looks perfect, has also a perfect looper :3

[unique patrol]

2800 words.
The chapter is done. Time to edit it :3

[unique patrol]

https://archiveofourown.org/works/55635643/chapters/147130129

Chapter 17 of Corroded Destiny. Time for some Scavenger-assisted medical procedures.

[static pecan]

yoo already?

[unique patrol]

I woke up and chose violence
Speaking of. I have something exciting to draw :3

[static pecan]

oh?

[unique patrol]

you will have an idea what it will be at the ending of the chapter

[static pecan]

welp time to read asap i guess

[unique patrol]

:p

[static pecan]

Damn you for ending on such a moment

Anyways, comma after "older" maybe?

I think comma after "full" as well

Hm, no visual indication of POV shift?

Comma after "well"?

Commas after "then" and "on"? Also, "expression lit up"? Also not sure if it shouldn't be "with slow understanding"?

Okay here i'd put a comma after "them" and then restructure the end into ||"this conversation a lot easier, for you at least"|| (not sure if there also shouldn't be a comma after "for you")

Not sure if you need the comma after "pearl" tbh

I'd redo the middle sentence into sth like ||"At this point in time, my pumpworks (i think it's written together?) have dissolved and flooded my entire lowest layer, in consequence"||

Why is there a space before "in"?

I think maybe a comma after "aware" but i'm not sure

Again no visual POV change indicator?

Confiscated path? Doubt that's the right word. Maybe "obstructed path"? Also the repetition of "path" is kinda annoying but i'm not sure how to replace it. Maybe ||"quickly redirected them through the labirynth..."||?

And another POV change with no visual indication

||can't wait for the Gales vs scavs 1v2||

[unique patrol]

it will be fun

everything fixed. Sheesh, I forgot how many pov changes I had

sketch for chapter 18 in the works

[unique patrol]

https://archiveofourown.org/works/55635643/chapters/147130129

Repost of the link to chapter 17, for more visibility

[inner steeple]

FAST

[unique patrol]

wroom

[inner steeple]

||Angy Sky beeps ||
||I will reiterate I love the sign language ||
||WHAT ARE THOSE TWO PLANNING...||
||... WHISPY WAS RIGHT||

[inner steeple]

||"YOU WANNA GO?? THINK AGAIN"||

[unique patrol]

||At least for some. Ocean chose violence. Did he chose correctly?||
||beep, beeeeep <3||

[static pecan]

||"YOU GUYS ARE SO FUCKED"||

[unique patrol]

please, Gales would never resort to such profane language. That is Whisper's territory

[static pecan]

||"YOU GUYS ARE SO [pooped]"||

[unique patrol]

"The amount of profanity taboos I want to break right now ... IT'S UNBELIEVABLE!"

[static pecan]

Actually, due to her purpose, was she made with more strict profanity restrictions or sth like that?

[unique patrol]

stricter

[mental cosmos]

Can’t have the eye candy servant be impolite.

[unique patrol]

That as well. Also she is after all modelled after a monk, being the guardian of solitude

[mental cosmos]

“Solitude”.

The Ancients’ equivalent of cheat day was a day on her island.

[unique patrol]

True.
Still
Be patient

20 more chapters and you should know more.
If I can get Gales mobile in that amount.

[static pecan]

God now i imagine her being like a ray of sunshine on the outside while she's also like "They don't know the taboos are the only thing stopping me from inventing new insults"

[static pecan]

this might take a while

[unique patrol]

The weak protagonist energy is strong in her. Just how I like my lead protagonists

[static pecan]

She's strong on the inside

[unique patrol]

and with her right and left hooks :P

[woven cedar]

So quick as usual!
consumed.
hmm
||What exactly those two wanted to accomplish there, outright attacking a 'god' like that... either Ocean already gave them this secret order already (maybe they don't respect Gales/ blame her for the acid rain?) or they thought they could 'get rid of' the cause of acid rain? I mean they technically aren't wrong, but it's flabbergasting that they actually thought they could 'kill' a god...||

[unique patrol]

||In their defense. This scavenger tribe is very isolated. The only Iterators around are Gales and Sky. Sky never interacted with any Scavenger, has not let anyone in after setting the intelligence and gene boosted kind go rampart. And Gales actet very dismissively of the Scavengers up until now. Of course they do not know what she truly is, a random goddess.||

[woven cedar]

||very risky, very risky....||

[unique patrol]

you can't imagine. I am currently writing chapter 18 >:3

[static pecan]

||it's not like they have any aces up their sleeves, right? ||

[unique patrol]

I think I am on the roll

Already 1700 words in chapter 18

[static pecan]

holy shit

[unique patrol]

||Writing a fight scene is like a blur. You either write it all in one go, or not at all||

[wet cedar]

New chapter read, comment deployed. I’m glad we got a slugcat scene, I had almost forgotten about them with all this other stuff!

[unique patrol]

It is a first sign :3 Preparing the next focus arc while we are in the final chapters of the current one.
There will be a return to Spearmaster, Irradiant, Suns and Sky very soon :3

[wet cedar]

I’m looking forward to old wise master of the spear teaching this impatient young ball of acid the finer arts of the scug… perhaps through some kind of training montage?

[static pecan]

[Upbeat training music]

[unique patrol]

Skype call Training Montage :p

[steady whale]

aughh!! I can barely keep up with you lmao you're on a rolll

[unique patrol]

You couldn't stop as well if you would write some ||righteous wrath||

I think I will finish this current arc with chapter 19 and return to Sky with 20 :3
Still have some smaller parts to explore in the current scenario

[wet cedar]

Spearmaster hologram beating the Irradiant in five hundred mock battles:
“If you can’t get past this much, you’ll be no match for a red lizard”

[unique patrol]

Irradiant: "I would if my dissolving spit wouldn't phase right through you, doofus!"

[wet cedar]

“The place you’re going to is flooded with acid! You think you’re gonna be the only thing there that’s immune to it?”
Training montage continues

To be clear… I don’t know that you should actually put in an 80s movie style training montage… but it’s fun to think about

[unique patrol]

Initiating 'I'm gonna be the very best, like no one ever was,' as Sky mixes and even stronger acid into Irradiant's genepool.

"Suns, your little friend has no faith in the potency of my prowess. That acid that gales has is nothing against the sheer radiating glory that is 00...Irradiant."

[wet cedar]

I can picture the scene now…

[unique patrol]

Suns will be not pleased

Ohhhhh, finally.
Took a bit but I am now in the top 300 of the most kudossed rainworld fics

[wet cedar]

Well deserved

[unique patrol]

30 more kudos to the top 200

[steady whale]

You'll get there I'm sure!!

especially with how long running this is :3

[unique patrol]

In my current rate can that be translated to chapter 47 :P

[steady whale]

well deserved, indeed

lets see if the end of summer boosts us haha

[unique patrol]

I literally get 1 kudos per chapter

[wet cedar]

I can see this story going a while longer… but that long

[unique patrol]

It hugely depends on a few factors, Cy

I do estimate Gales being able to move not before chapter ... 35?
Depends on how many Cys' add more conflict into it :P

[wet cedar]

People also sort fics by length, apparently, so the longer you get it, the more attention it will get, most likely!

[steady whale]

also more time on the front page

with each update

[static pecan]

feedback loop

[unique patrol]

Already on the same page as banan and Amany, nearly neighbours even

[steady whale]

you're gonna catch up to me in length in no time

at your rate

i can't keep up with you... you're too powerful...

[unique patrol]

HFish: 24th
BS Hell: 27th
CD: 29th longest

[steady whale]

I'm 24th by length?

[unique patrol]

yep

[steady whale]

RW fandom is weak

my piddly 60k would be nowhere near the top in a more active fandom lmao

[unique patrol]

first page is currently 69k

[steady whale]

nice

[unique patrol]

Top 10 is 132k

[steady whale]

I don't think hfish will hit that

based on my plans

100k maybe

[unique patrol]

11 is 100k

get your 11 here

[static pecan]

Huh BTS is sitting at 27th?

[unique patrol]

yes, Amany is after all a madman with 10k chapters

[steady whale]

amany is also insanely productive

[static pecan]

And that's without a new chapter in, what...

[unique patrol]

nearly a month

07.09

[static pecan]

A bit over 3 weeks

Holding up well, I think

[unique patrol]

with nearly 3x my kudos

Curse you Pebbles!

[wet cedar]

I’m never making it to the front page on length…

[steady whale]

never say never

[wet cedar]

It’s the pebbles effect, nothing we can do

[steady whale]

maybe you'll be hit upside the head with a CD-length idea

[wet cedar]

My CD length idea is Spear and that ends in five chapters

[static pecan]

See, if only you added pebbles to the main CD

[wet cedar]

Which obviously isn’t actually CD length…

[static pecan]

Oh and don't forget the ~20k chapter we nearly got

[unique patrol]

I added a pebbles insult to FW and it didn't boost it to hell and back

Well, sooner or later I can add NSH to the character list and then we are gucchi

[wet cedar]

It was insane… they sent me it to proofread and after I was done with the first page I tried to scroll down
And then I was like “wow, the scroll bar didn’t move very much” so I checked the word count…

[unique patrol]

My condolences

[wet cedar]

I’m always amazed when someone writes a chapter that’s 10k or more!

[static pecan]

So, how many words was it?

[static pecan]

Yeah cause it wasn't in the main fic

[wet cedar]

16k and change, and it was only about 2/3rds done

Amany’s workflow is insane

[static pecan]

Yeah so like 24k, a teeny tiny chapter

Funny

[unique patrol]

the main fic would only include a certain Erratic Pulse if even <.<
But I don't think pebbles would be still active among the sliverists after moon's collapse

[wet cedar]

People say I write a lot, I wish I wrote that much… frankly, I wish I wrote as much as Soul’s doing rn!

[unique patrol]

I don't write that much

My chapters are barely above 3000 words long

past me would be amazed

[static pecan]

Yeah but they do get put out fast, that's for sure

[wet cedar]

So are mine, but I feel like you get yours out twice as fast…

[static pecan]

And they convey what needs to be conveyed, I think

[unique patrol]

The chapters of my personal world stories were usually about 1500-2000 words long

[unique patrol]

it depends. I explained it to you.
I require these small intro chapters while finishing up an arc to keep my drive. Hence why 001 returned in chapter 17

[static pecan]

No but like, 2 chapters in 3 days, with another on the horizon?

[unique patrol]

if you just look at those you can see a pattern. The beginning of a new arc features mini stories to wrap up the prior out of the view of others while the end of an arc prepares the next first before wrapping up the current one

[unique patrol]

I am getting back in the groove. No exams to hold me back.
Well, until the end of this month at least, then my practice semester starts. Means working from monday to saturday every week.
These 6-7 months will give you all plenty of time to catch up

[static pecan]

6 day workweek sounds kinda rough tho ngl

[unique patrol]

it is my fault

I keep my weekend job to boost my wallet

[static pecan]

Ah

[unique patrol]

And to stay insured

[static pecan]

Oh shit it's past midnight i better be going now, cya

[wet cedar]

Couldn’t be me

[wet cedar]

real

[static pecan]

I wonder who else is in such a timezone

[unique patrol]

I should be sleeping soon as well.
Hmm
...
Might as well write a few more words before bed.
Make it a round 2000

[wet cedar]

The best writing comes at the edge of sleep deprivation

[static pecan]

Well I ain't the one to stop you, I guess

[unique patrol]

Indeed. I have my best ideas between 0-2am

[static pecan]

Anyways, signing off

[unique patrol]

Stay strong, soldier

[mental cosmos]

I feel this.

[unique patrol]

Have I said I stop at 2000?
I mean of course 2400.
First section done, I will finish the arc in the next chapter.
Now all that is left is to figure out what I want to adress in the second section to prepare the next arc. Hmm...

But first, sleep.
Maybe we will have another chapter tomorrow :3

[unique patrol]

We have now a spot in the forums: #1268451955974340660 message

I am still insure which one I want to continue using, but sooner or later do I plan to move to the forums due to the sheer enhanced visibility alone.

[sterile briar]

nooooo.
rest in peace cd thread, you will be missed

[unique patrol]

It is not yet abandoned, Amany :p
It depends on the willingness of others here to move to it

Also, have you already enjoyed the latest chapter? 👀

[sterile briar]

i will move over if you focus more on the forum, tho i cant say that i like how it looks, visibility is great there, i have to agree, but i hate the layout so much
i also love them tiny threads

[sterile briar]

as for that, i still have to read it. i could do it now, but i almost havent posted anything bs hell wise in over a month so i have to finally get that damn chapter ready.
i will read it later when i have my break at work since i cant write there tho, you will get you answer probably toning

[unique patrol]

I mean the forum thread essentially looks and functions the same with the exception for a more focused intro

[sterile briar]

true

[unique patrol]

The main difference is that the forums are more visible than the hidden threads nobody knows about

[sterile briar]

i guess im just worried that threads will be replaced all togther, we already have two woafs and two story miscs now, if we use both it will end up unfocused but abondinging the ones we used so far seems not much better for newcomers that want to catch up

[static pecan]

Oh hey you can create forums yourselves that's cool

But yeah this could throw off people, if there are two places for a fic, or if a fic is only in one spot out of the two

[unique patrol]

The long term goal is to retire threads altogether. We will see how well that works.

Threads Can still be utilized normally. Once threads has zero activity for a significant amount of time we will disable new thread creation.

[static pecan]

oh the horrors

[sterile briar]

huh???

nooooo

not the threads

[woven cedar]

Inb4 BTS BtShell becomes the last thread active

[sterile briar]

i will not give in to the temptation of the forums,

[static pecan]

The only reason for why you will still be able to make threads

Oh god, forget the fact that some fics now have 2 places for them, there are now 2 stories misc chats

[sterile briar]

my biggest issue so far tbh, sure, forums for stories is one thing since they can serve two different purposes, but what does a second story misc chat do?

[static pecan]

||introduce a split in the community /j||

[sterile briar]

im worried that it might be less of a /j sadly, worst case scenario of course, but a possibility

[static pecan]

Or just to multithread offtopic conversations

[sterile briar]

the mods are going to have a field day

[sterile briar]

also yes, i will try to fight until the bitter end, threads for everyone i say 🗣️ 🔊 📢

[woven cedar]

The problem with the thread system is that a user has to ask mods/helpers to make one, and I'd imagine there are some who feel uncomfortable doing that

[sterile briar]

true, i think the story helper introduction helped with that, but at the end of the day the forums are more accessible for everyone

[woven cedar]

And the funny thing is we have misc2 before general 2 in the forum

[static pecan]

You can ask courier tho, no?

[woven cedar]

Courier = mod?

[static pecan]

I mean it makes it feel like you are not asking a specific mod/helper so maybe that helps?

Idk

[woven cedar]

True... also sorry soulwing we're hijacking the thread again

[unique patrol]

I was asleep regardless. Go nuts

[unique patrol]

Chapter 18 is done and saved as draft. Only have to finish the sketch from yesterday and we are golden.

[static pecan]

speedrunning

[unique patrol]

it was a fun chapter to write. The first where some action was happening

[steady whale]

He’s so fast

He cannot be stopped

[unique patrol]

You still have a 12000 words headstart, Banan, till I catch up with you.
With other words 4 more chapters :3

[steady whale]

I’m not gonna make it!!!

I don’t have your energy

[unique patrol]

you can do it

[unique patrol]

https://archiveofourown.org/works/55635643/chapters/147199654

Chapter 18 of Corroded Destiny. Righteous Wrath!
Tldr: Implied death and the cycle of death and rebirth are a major plot point this chapter.
No gore or graphic descriptions, however. Enjoy ^^

[static pecan]

Oh shit new chapter

[unique patrol]

Indeed

[woven cedar]

Excuse me? Only 28 hrs and a new chapter already? What's this speed

Are you perhaps compensating for hiatus during the exam month

[unique patrol]

You betcha

Also I was burning for this chapter because Cy's suggestion turned this mundane arc in ... this!

[static pecan]

Issue, I can't go through all of this as of now but I do have a few things i have noticed already, you want what I got or you wanna wait till i go through all of it prolly in the next few hours?

[unique patrol]

You can take your time with it. I am needed in the kitchen the next couple hours

[static pecan]

Aye

[steady whale]

Cy’s suggestions are magic

[unique patrol]

I hope you enjoy :3

Been a while since I last wrote an action scene with some suspense

[woven cedar]

Thoughts given

[unique patrol]

And what nice thoughts:3

#1268451955974340660 message
Aight, haven’t mentioned it here yet.
New home, hopefully better organized than the old

[static pecan]

Seeing everything move to the forums makes you feel things

I'll wrap up reading and sweeping, now

[unique patrol]

For now I will only use it as a glorified gallery. I won't change ships from one day to the next, slowly

[static pecan]

Comma after "eternity"?

"Previously untapped locations"? Not sure about untapped, either. Also comma after "superstructure"

Effectiveness? Efficiency? Not effectivity, pretty sure

Missing space after a dot here

I think a comma after "friend"? Uncertain. Also move the "was" to after "gales"

Move "could" to after "outbreak"

Remove either "surely" or "probably", I think you are better off with just one? Also if you're keeping surely then maybe move it to after "had"

Seven Red Suns'

Gales' champion. Maybe a comma after "happened" but i'm unsure?

Maybe comma after "back"? One after "gaze" for sure

I'd move "be" to after "soon" and "for them" to the end of its sentence

I have this screenshotted but I have no clue what was past me thinking

Comma after "breaker"

"Gales' expression"

"Gales' tower", again

Also not sure if it should be "both looked" or "both look" but this is way outside of what I can say with some certainty

[inner steeple]

"both look"

[static pecan]

Commas before and after "according to him"

I'd either switch "learned already" around or move "already" to before the next comma

Sky had granted

Commas after "know" (I think) and "even" (pretty sure)

||yeah Gales, go kick some scav ass wooooo ||

||re-encountering them would be funny||

[unique patrol]

||That is the plan next chapter ||

[static pecan]

||hey bro you recall our lizards acting kinda hostile towards us recently?"||

[unique patrol]

Will correct after dinner

[static pecan]

AH okay there is a repetition of "question", maybe replace the 2nd one with "query" or sth? also comma after "lost" i think

[unique patrol]

Alright, let's go down to business

[unique patrol]

All errors adressed and fixed.

And all comments answered :3

Woo!
84 on CD + 16 on FW

[static pecan]

yippie

[sterile briar]

@unique patrol wtf, already another chapter

how do you do this

HOW

[unique patrol]

I just started on chapter 19 :3

also easy

my chapters are only a fraction in length regarding to yours

[unique patrol]

only 100 words, no worries.

[sterile briar]

not anymore

mine are getting cut like to four times the original size, i have no excuses

[unique patrol]

four times!? You mean they get even longer?
... Or do you mean a quarter of the original size?

[sterile briar]

ugh im so tired, yes its the second

[unique patrol]

Just cut up all existing chapters and you have already more chapters than I have

[unique patrol]

Alright. Enough for tonight. First 700 words of chapter 19 in the bag

[wet cedar]

you're a machine man

[unique patrol]

It's just text, words building sentences, creating a chain of interconnected thoughts.
Nothing mystical.

[wet cedar]

nothing mystical... just damn impressive to get out three chapters in like a week, that's all

[steady whale]

So are you buddy

Idk how either of you have been so productive

Gimme your powers

[unique patrol]

I call it boredom :p

[steady whale]

I call it hoarding the juice

I’m onto you

[unique patrol]

I mean ... I did describe it to Drymm earlier today.

I have too much imagination. My drive of writing and drawing originates from a brain overflowing in very three dimensional ideas and constructs.
I use art and writing to stay sane, to print the good ideas in that cauldron on a canvas

[steady whale]

I’m always imagining stuff too, I’m just not as good at applying those thoughts, probably

My executive dysfunction is stronger than me

Anyway I’m pretty sure you’re just hoarding the juice. You can’t trick me

[wet cedar]

yeah, my juice has been all gone for the last couple days... soul musta took it all

[unique patrol]

I have a ridiculous imagination. The first years of art were torture for me because I never could bring my outstanding mental images to paper.

I am still not there yet, but now art feels good, because I am fairly close to my imagination

[mental cosmos]

My brain is brimming with creative juices.

A less specific and more general kind.

Unfortunately, can’t write yet, so I use it in other ways.

[unique patrol]

The creation of the Neuron Brain

[unique patrol]

#1268451955974340660 message
New home

[unique patrol]

https://archiveofourown.org/works/55635643/chapters/147515611

Chapter 19 of CD is online. Everything is [Redacted]
Have fun :3

[static pecan]

Hm actually i could send the corrections here to not clog up the new forum

I should rollout my new method already

I'd move "should" to after "building"

"Box having recovered enough"?

"Enough his palm was not"

Repetition of "technology", maybe replace the 2nd one with "it"?

Also comma after "music" I think?

I'd put a comma after "intact" and maybe switch "do already" around

Not sure about the sentence with thinking here tbh

In comparasion

Ascent. Also maybe a comma after "topic"?

I'd switch the "in the time" to "at the time" and move "at the time of her overseer's arrival" to after "cyans"

Gales', also i'd move "not soon after" to after "assasins"

I'd maybe move "when it already went dark" to the end of the sentence? Also maybe "got dark", I think?

Remove the "a" before "more". Maybe also add a comma after and before "however"?

"Should have expected that"?

Comma after "tokens". Also i'd move "in there" to the end of its sentence

"All the data is"

Not sure about this, maybe just "intercept them"?

I'd put a comma before and after "Unrelenting Wave Breaker"

Also i'd move "tighter" to the end of its sentence

[unique patrol]

Good idea ^^
And oh boy, much to do

[static pecan]

Commas before and after "however"?

No clue here, with that part about scales

"With coast doing the same"? To avoid repetition of "and"

Comma after "cycles"?

I'd move "in less than a cycle" to the end of the sentence

That's all (i think)

[unique patrol]

Everything fixed ^^
Thank you :3

[static pecan]

behold the new and improved correcting method which i have totally only just started using /j
(lines with some note or correction are marked with [!], just compare them to the original ones you have)

[unique patrol]

Oh my

[static pecan]

(if you prefer what i was doing previously just let know)

[unique patrol]

That is so short, you can use the main forum for that even :3

Oh wait, I should check on it in desktop

[unique patrol]

I can work with that ^^

In fact, I am finished

[heady horizon]

@unique patrol soulwing soulwing I have a question!!!!
i'm planning to put Suns city in as a spearmaster exclusive thing can i name it Sunpeak PLEASSEEEE?

[unique patrol]

Permission oh so granted

You are modding Suns‘ Can into existence?

[heady horizon]

yes!!!

it's going to be a myrmice kinda thing if you know what i mean

[unique patrol]

An anthill?

[heady horizon]

nooo its going to be a series of 3 regions

like chasing wind

[unique patrol]

Ohh

[inner steeple]

SUNPEAK REAL?!?

[heady horizon]

SUNPEAK REAL!!!!!

[unique patrol]

I would be honored ^^

And glad to know that my little fic is getting known in the modding scene

[heady horizon]

I just had the idea

How would you like it to look though?

[unique patrol]

Hmm
I mean I do have an idea how it should look like, but yeah, it is very religious-like with a big central basilica, surrounded by something akin to a cloister forest with some living blocks in the outer layers

Also, this thread is more or less retired.
If you want to stay up to date with my fic, art and everything, feel free to join my forum:

#1268451955974340660 message

[unique patrol]

I should do a small concept map for sunpeak like I did for gales‘ island. 🤔

[heady horizon]

Omw to make this a dlc

[unique patrol]

Someone is motivated ^^

[heady horizon]

Yeahhh also ur pfp is adorable i love it

[unique patrol]

Drawn by the lovely @inner steeple, featuring our both Protagonists

[heady horizon]

Omggg

[inner steeple]

:3

[heady horizon]

You did such a good job!!!

[unique patrol]

My version of the duo :3

[static pecan]

@sterile briar boo

[sterile briar]

ahhhhhh

scary

[static pecan]

Alright, here goes

Comma after first "me", maybe? Thinking about one after "ascension" but doubtful. One after "remained", pretty sure

I'd throw out the period to nail down the fact that spears got interrupted?

Comma after "understood". I'd change it to "you will be stuck with your set of skills at that time" or sth like that

[sterile briar]

ohhh, you werent kidding with old methods

[static pecan]

Yeah, sadly

[sterile briar]

oh god, that bad

[compact niche]

No comma after unsure is correct, should be a : after realized

[static pecan]

"We have already lost..."?

Maybe "luckily, you were a quick learner of my language, regardless"?

Maybe "easier from now on"?

[static pecan]

A bit of a pain to work with, i've tasted the luxury of .txt

[sterile briar]

whats better, .txt or google docs

[static pecan]

Comma after "so" and "although"?

[static pecan]

Docs > txt > this

"... that means, can't you?"

[sterile briar]

got it, you will get the docs version for future posts right away
they are also the easiest for me so perfect

[static pecan]

Comma after "luckily"?

I'd maybe change it a bit to "And, to add to the situation, let me ask you a question, small..." or at least comma after that "and"

"You were made acid- and radiation-proof to such a glowing degree, to survive..." imo

"Imagine having your acidic saliva in your body while not being immune to it" personally

(Why is irradiant radiation-proof? There is radioactivity there?)

"Dirt, and plants"

Comma before "on top of that"?

"I can teach you some aspects of survival this way"

I think you can remove all commas in the last sentence? Not sure

Comma after "orders"? Not sure

I'd remove all commas before "that" I think?

[unique patrol]

much to do

[static pecan]

"... observed the discussion between the two slugcats with forced interest"

Comma after "unbound"? Not sure

[static pecan]

Not done yet, this is going a bit slowly

the merits of the holy .txt

Comma after "coordinator"? Not sure

Commas before and after "of course"? And also one after "meaningful" I believe

With how earlier you've written "centicycles", shouldn't that be "decacycles"?

"... who at that point met daily for their..."

"At one cycle"? Not "during one cycle"? I'd also add a comma after "cycle"

"... once more and, this time, he acted..."

"... though locking his eyes on the projection...", "... while locking..."?

Comma before "if you are"?

Personally, "... Suns would take notice of his moment of uncharacteristic weakness soon after"

"If moon still were around..."?

"How are you holding up"

Comma after "fascinating"?

"Language, behaviour, and beliefs"

"I have been following Breaker's quest for a bit already to..."

I don't get the sentence with the "entangled quantum"

Comma after "dependency"?

Comma before and after "iterators"?

Okay done

[unique patrol]

My mistake. Meant acid proof to such a degree you developed that radiating aura

[static pecan]

Ah

[unique patrol]

Two quants at set coordinates that act exactly the same no matter what the other is doing. If you move 1 up, 2 will move up by itself. They are entangled

[static pecan]

Ah so it sends the information the same distance, always?

[unique patrol]

They always are in their relative space in the same location.

[static pecan]

Ah

[unique patrol]

There is no active information exchange as both depict the same. If A moves it, B will see it moving. Vice versa

Everything taken care of

[static pecan]

So they see their movements and that's how they communicate?

[unique patrol]

yes. Person A arranges the matrix in a specific way to send a message to B. B reads the message or data, extracts it and rearranges the matrix. It is limited in usage but has no latency and doesn't support group calls or multiple users per device. In the version Gales finds it in.

[static pecan]

Oh hm also small observation with how the 2nd to last sentence is formed which i find curious

"It is limited in usage [negative] but [implies further positives] has no latency [positive] and doesn't support group calls or multiple users [negative which kinda makes it sound weird in this config]"

[unique patrol]

true

[mental surge]

someone dared mention this thread in a channel i reside in

[unique patrol]

oh? How so? I hope only in a positive light

[mental surge]

#1268412914671423538 message

it was a channel i had yet to join so i joined it

[static pecan]

Could have sworn i linked the forum...

[unique patrol]

oh yeah :P Whisper x Gales and so on
But you already joined the newer forum

[mental surge]

why not join the old one, it seems yall are using it

[static pecan]

Mostly when somebody remembers it or to avoid trashing the forum with... stuff

[unique patrol]

Mainly only for proofreading of our resident proofreader here ;3

[static pecan]

(Bunch of messages up)