#epic-battles | Terraria | Page 179

gleaming groveBOT Mar 26, 2026, 4:24 AM

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@fiery belfry, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

slate fulcrum Mar 26, 2026, 4:26 AM

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bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 26, 2026, 4:26 AM

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@slate fulcrum, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

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@livid shuttle, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

hexed notch Mar 26, 2026, 4:28 AM

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bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 26, 2026, 4:28 AM

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@hexed notch, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

rare gust Mar 26, 2026, 4:29 AM

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bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 26, 2026, 4:29 AM

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@rare gust, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

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Registration will be closing in about 30 seconds.

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Registration is now closed!

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Let the battle begin!

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The fighting has begun to die down...

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The fighting has stopped!

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There are 16 players remaining.
@glacial totem, @empty ocean, @carmine cairn, @undone notch, @slender quarry, @hexed notch, @soft lark, @next hemlock, @fiery belfry, @slate fulcrum, @rare gust, @long vine, @oblique lantern, @livid shuttle, @strong sierra, and @cerulean mauve
Send me a private message to register for the final battle.
We will continue the battle in 2-4 minutes.

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The fighting begins again!

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@soft lark had fun breaking a lake of thin ice by falling on it repeatedly and using a Cloud in a Bottle at the last second.

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@fiery belfry began T-posing menacingly. They were so intimidating that no one dared to attack.

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The Headless Horseman wanted to experience the feeling of having a head, so they borrowed @glacial totem's. @glacial totem died.

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@cerulean mauve was fired from their job after the manager caught them with their hands in the cookie jar and their feet in a plastic bin of lettuce.

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@empty ocean angered the squirrel gods and was flattened under a mountain of acorns. @empty ocean died.

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@undone notch woke up to ash and dust. Then they breathed in the chemicals. @undone notch died.

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@slender quarry forgot to equip their Lucky Horseshoe before going down a Hellevator. @slender quarry died.

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@hexed notch made a painting of the Wall of Flesh. Now they can be Horrified whenever they want. Hooray!

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@oblique lantern took a break from the battle to travel to Sweden with the Party Girl.

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@slate fulcrum got stomped on the head and eventually squashed flat by a desk lamp. @slate fulcrum died.

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@livid shuttle started barking like a dog while chasing @rare gust.

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@oblique lantern found themselves trapped inside an escape room and got stuck there forever, even though the solution was supposed to be really simple. @oblique lantern died.

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@livid shuttle panicked during a fight and drank out of the first red-colored potion bottle they could get out of their bag. It wasn't a healing potion. @livid shuttle died.

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@soft lark wouldn't stop complaining about the wrong person dying in epic battle scenes. It was getting annoying, so @cerulean mauve killed them. @cerulean mauve died.

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@hexed notch read their Countercurse Mantra but mispronounced all the words, accidentally ushering in a thousand years of darkness upon Terraria.

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@next hemlock touched a colorful mushroom and was transported to a fantasy world filled with mushroom-headed people ruled by a magical princess.

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@carmine cairn visited the Louvre Museum to view the Mona Lisa. People always talked about Mona Lisa's smile, but @carmine cairn thought her hands were more interesting.

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.siht ekil dekool txet eht lla erehw ,noisnemid rorrim a ni deppart tog wohemos @rare gust

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@strong sierra and @rare gust were yelled at by the neighbors for screaming too loudly while trying to murder each other.

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@hexed notch spent the entire day standing in front of a bank booth, cutting logs into unstrung longbows.

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@long vine claimed to be a real superhero, and immediately was on the run after getting chased by the world's number one villain.

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@soft lark dove into lava while wearing a Lava Charm to escape from @next hemlock, but @next hemlock simply dumped some water over the lava's surface. @soft lark died.

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@hexed notch programmed a machine to remove their brain and put it in a robotic body, effectively making them immortal. Unfortunately, the machine only completed the first step. @hexed notch died.

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@fiery belfry wanted to order a cool headset with cat ears, but Amazon didn't recognize Terraria as a valid mailing address.

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@long vine broke open a Shadow Orb and received a Musket. However, this Musket seemed a bit elongated compared to the average Musket.

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@rare gust found a big red button that would give them a million dollars, but would also kill a random person somewhere in the world. They pushed the button and got a million dollars. @strong sierra died.

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@fiery belfry smashed three Shadow Orbs for loot and skedaddled out of there with a Recall Potion.

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@carmine cairn crafted a Pearlwood Sword. @next hemlock laughed at them, not knowing that @carmine cairn was just a completionist.

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@rare gust became so famous that people started writing fanfictions about them. Out of curiosity, they read one and immediately died of embarrassment. @rare gust died.

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@next hemlock started riding a Unicorn. @fiery belfry chased @next hemlock while knocking two coconut halves together.

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@carmine cairn was cornered by @next hemlock, but survived by bribing them with 3 platinum coins.

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@fiery belfry found a mysterious doll and popped its head off. @next hemlock died.

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@fiery belfry started clapping to add emphasis to their sentences, but :clap: it :clap: just :clap: made :clap: it :clap: harder :clap: to :clap: read.

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@fiery belfry gently opened the door, and was jumpscared so hard that they glitched out of existence. @fiery belfry died.

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@carmine cairn decided to try Minecraft after Terraria told them, "Also try Minecraft!" They ended up returning to Terraria after Minecraft told them, "Also try Terraria!"

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@carmine cairn overclocked a Spear Trap, creating a surprisingly good mining tool.

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@long vine tried to hide from a school of sharks, but they had forgotten to take off their Jellyfish Necklace. @long vine died.

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The battle is over!

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The Winner is @carmine cairn!

Prize Time!

1000 points go to 1st place: @carmine cairn
500 points go to 2nd place: @long vine
250 points go to 3rd place: @fiery belfry
150 points go to 4th place: @next hemlock
150 points go to 5th place: @rare gust
150 points go to 6th place: @strong sierra
100 points go to 7th place: @hexed notch
100 points go to 8th place: @soft lark
100 points go to 9th place: @cerulean mauve
100 points go to 10th place: @livid shuttle

Thanks for Playing Everyone!

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Registration is open!
Type bb!register to join the next battle!
The battle will start at the next 30 minute mark (e.g. 1:30, 2:30, 3:30).

long vine Mar 26, 2026, 4:39 AM

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bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 26, 2026, 4:39 AM

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@long vine, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

next hemlock Mar 26, 2026, 4:41 AM

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bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 26, 2026, 4:41 AM

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@next hemlock, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

soft lark Mar 26, 2026, 4:43 AM

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bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 26, 2026, 4:43 AM

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@soft lark, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

empty ocean Mar 26, 2026, 4:49 AM

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bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 26, 2026, 4:49 AM

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@empty ocean, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

strong sierra Mar 26, 2026, 4:53 AM

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bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 26, 2026, 4:53 AM

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@strong sierra, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

undone notch Mar 26, 2026, 5:10 AM

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bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 26, 2026, 5:10 AM

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@undone notch, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

mossy jolt Mar 26, 2026, 5:18 AM

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bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 26, 2026, 5:18 AM

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@mossy jolt, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

fiery belfry Mar 26, 2026, 5:19 AM

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bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 26, 2026, 5:19 AM

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@fiery belfry, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

carmine cairn Mar 26, 2026, 5:25 AM

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bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 26, 2026, 5:25 AM

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@carmine cairn, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

tidal bane Mar 26, 2026, 5:28 AM

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bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 26, 2026, 5:28 AM

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@tidal bane, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

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Registration will be closing in about 30 seconds.

brave shore Mar 26, 2026, 5:30 AM

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bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 26, 2026, 5:30 AM

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@brave shore, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

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Registration is now closed!

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Let the battle begin!

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The fighting has begun to die down...

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The fighting has stopped!

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There are 11 players remaining.
@empty ocean, @tidal bane, @carmine cairn, @undone notch, @soft lark, @fiery belfry, @next hemlock, @long vine, @mossy jolt, @strong sierra, and @brave shore
Send me a private message to register for the final battle.
We will continue the battle in 2-4 minutes.

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The fighting begins again!

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@undone notch drank a Teleportation Potion and ended up in a desolate place full of coarse, rough, irritating sand that gets everywhere.

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@empty ocean had an idea on how to defeat Moon Lord! Unfortunately, the lightbulb that appeared above their head popped, sending glass shards into @empty ocean's skull. @empty ocean died.

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@undone notch was vehicularly manslaughtered by @next hemlock's minecart. @undone notch died.

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@brave shore, inspired by their recent fight with the Eye of Cthulhu, became the founder of a new cell phone company called Eye-Phone.

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@long vine wrote a book about the history of Terraria. Everyone loved it, except for the Mechanic.

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@fiery belfry thought it would be funny to fight Mourning Wood with their Golden Shower. They ended up dying due to their lack of DPS. @fiery belfry died.

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During a Goblin Invasion, a Goblin Peon smashed @carmine cairn's door to bits, rather than simply turning the doorknob. Will these goblins ever learn?

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@strong sierra tried to talk to the Witch Doctor but both of them just sat awkwardly for 10 minutes.

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@carmine cairn drank a few mugs of Ale and forgot how to walk.

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@next hemlock failed to properly hydrate. @next hemlock died.

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@mossy jolt and the Party Girl were no longer on speaking terms after she found out about @mossy jolt's stash of Happy Grenades that she definitely didn't remember selling.

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While streaming a fitness game, @long vine accidentally leaked their body weight to the entire Internet.

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@long vine somehow angered the sun itself, so it flew down and roasted them to a cinder. @long vine died.

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@soft lark used the Rod of Discord and found themselves naked, bald, and trapped inside a Bee Hive.

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@strong sierra and @brave shore farmed the Wall of Flesh for free Demonite Bricks with their leftover Guide Voodoo Dolls.

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@mossy jolt tried using a Pocket Mirror to sneak up on a Medusa, but objects in the mirror are closer than they appear. @mossy jolt died.

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@tidal bane contemplated a life in which they were unable to die.

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@soft lark's pet rock was tragically killed by an arrow. @soft lark sobbed while holding its lifeless body.

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While it was raining, a goldfish started spinning infinitely while clipped inside a block. @tidal bane was relieved to see that everything in Terraria was as it should be and always has been.

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@soft lark's friends decided to host a surprise birthday party for @soft lark! They were genuinely surprised, because that day wasn't their birthday.

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@tidal bane broke the server rules and was squashed under a giant hammer. @tidal bane died.

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@brave shore did the Merchant's job for a day. They ended up with piles upon piles of Grilled Squirrels, Jellyfish Necklaces, and Night Vision Helmets, and no idea what to do with them.

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@soft lark accidentally pressed a key between F1 and F12, which obscured their screen with numbers. As they scrambled to figure out which key it was, an Eater of Souls pushed them into a chasm. @soft lark died.

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@strong sierra tried to steal a gun from the Traveling Merchant, and got turned into julienne fries. @strong sierra died.

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@carmine cairn took the term "farming" too literally, and tried watering @brave shore's Rod of Discord.

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@brave shore's night is going to be terrible, with vibrations from deep below and the air getting colder around them... @brave shore died.

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The battle is over!

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The Winner is @carmine cairn!

Prize Time!

1000 points go to 1st place: @carmine cairn
500 points go to 2nd place: @brave shore
250 points go to 3rd place: @strong sierra
150 points go to 4th place: @soft lark
150 points go to 5th place: @tidal bane
150 points go to 6th place: @mossy jolt
100 points go to 7th place: @long vine
100 points go to 8th place: @next hemlock
100 points go to 9th place: @fiery belfry
100 points go to 10th place: @undone notch

Thanks for Playing Everyone!

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Registration is open!
Type bb!register to join the next battle!
The battle will start at the next 30 minute mark (e.g. 1:30, 2:30, 3:30).

tidal bane Mar 26, 2026, 5:37 AM

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bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 26, 2026, 5:37 AM

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@tidal bane, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

fiery belfry Mar 26, 2026, 5:38 AM

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bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 26, 2026, 5:38 AM

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@fiery belfry, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

small sphinx Mar 26, 2026, 5:39 AM

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bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 26, 2026, 5:39 AM

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@small sphinx, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

waxen marlin Mar 26, 2026, 5:58 AM

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bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 26, 2026, 5:58 AM

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@waxen marlin, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

soft lark Mar 26, 2026, 6:01 AM

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bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 26, 2026, 6:01 AM

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@soft lark, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

undone notch Mar 26, 2026, 6:02 AM

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bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 26, 2026, 6:02 AM

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@undone notch, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

main ridge Mar 26, 2026, 6:03 AM

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bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 26, 2026, 6:04 AM

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@main ridge, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

strong sierra Mar 26, 2026, 6:06 AM

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bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 26, 2026, 6:06 AM

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@strong sierra, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

dull arrow Mar 26, 2026, 6:25 AM

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bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 26, 2026, 6:25 AM

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@dull arrow, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

upper palm Mar 26, 2026, 6:26 AM

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bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 26, 2026, 6:26 AM

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@upper palm, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

hexed notch Mar 26, 2026, 6:29 AM

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bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 26, 2026, 6:29 AM

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@hexed notch, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

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Registration will be closing in about 30 seconds.

proper wedge Mar 26, 2026, 6:30 AM

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bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 26, 2026, 6:30 AM

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@proper wedge, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

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Registration is now closed!

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Let the battle begin!

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The fighting has begun to die down...

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The fighting has stopped!

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There are 12 players remaining.
@tidal bane, @undone notch, @hexed notch, @soft lark, @fiery belfry, @upper palm, @proper wedge, @dull arrow, @small sphinx, @waxen marlin, @main ridge, and @strong sierra
Send me a private message to register for the final battle.
We will continue the battle in 2-4 minutes.

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The fighting begins again!

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@tidal bane placed a chest on some Active Stone Blocks. They placed some items in the chest and deactivated the blocks, and got immediately crushed by the neverending torrent of chests. @tidal bane died.

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@small sphinx accidentally sent a server invite, causing the ancient spirits of GalacticTest and Zeppelin to mute @small sphinx.

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@undone notch unlocked the ability to use 100% of their brain! Unfortunately, they quickly learned that this was exactly the same as having a seizure. @undone notch died.

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@fiery belfry read an article about spiders that said that they were harmless little creatures. @fiery belfry then decided to jump into a Spider Nest to find out if this was real. @fiery belfry died.

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@main ridge shot a sand block at @hexed notch with a Sandgun, but @hexed notch managed to mine it while it was still in the air.

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@soft lark laughed madly while throwing Stink Potions all over the map.

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@dull arrow was fighting Duke Fishron, but got interrupted by a FaceTime call at the worst possible time. @dull arrow died.

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@waxen marlin lulled @small sphinx into a false sense of security by typing "lul" over and over, and then stabbed them in the kidney. @small sphinx died.

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@waxen marlin wanted to jump as high as possible with their Bundle of Balloons, but forgot to bring a Lucky Horseshoe. @waxen marlin died.

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Celestial creatures started invading! @proper wedge knew they couldn't deal with these creatures, so they just packed up and left.

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@main ridge was driving towards the battle when their car suddenly transformed into a humanoid robot while they were still inside. @main ridge died.

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@hexed notch tried to kill @strong sierra with a Nebula Arcanum, forgetting that it doesn't follow players.

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@proper wedge hopped on their Flying Carpet and rode to a whole new world! Sadly, this was a whole new world where griefers had surrounded the spawn point with Lihzahrd Bricks and filled it with lava. @proper wedge died.

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@upper palm tied up @soft lark and programmed a machine to slowly cut them in half with a laser. Then they left, expecting @soft lark to die. However, @soft lark managed to escape from their bonds.

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@strong sierra asked @upper palm if they "knew the way". @upper palm didn't chuckle. Instead, they flexed their knuckles. Oh no.

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@soft lark was minding their own business when they were suddenly punctured from the inside by a blunt-headed alien thing. @soft lark died.

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@upper palm emerged from a tree stump and scolded @hexed notch for chopping down too many trees. However, they forgot to consider that @hexed notch was still holding an axe. @upper palm died.

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@strong sierra asked @hexed notch to give them a hand, so @hexed notch chopped one off from a nearby zombie and gave it to them.

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@hexed notch found a strange letter in their mailbox with an unfamiliar-looking wax seal, and threw it away because it was probably junk mail.

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@strong sierra declared war against @hexed notch because they didn't like something @hexed notch said in their AMA.

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@hexed notch was building some cramped wooden boxes for their NPCs when they noticed a swarm of locusts and frogs approaching in the distance.

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@strong sierra started making kitchen knives out of various strange materials.

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@hexed notch was slowly and insidiously killed by overconfidence while exploring a dark dungeon. @hexed notch died.

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The battle is over!

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The Winner is @strong sierra!

Prize Time!

1000 points go to 1st place: @strong sierra
500 points go to 2nd place: @hexed notch
250 points go to 3rd place: @upper palm
150 points go to 4th place: @soft lark
150 points go to 5th place: @proper wedge
150 points go to 6th place: @main ridge
100 points go to 7th place: @waxen marlin
100 points go to 8th place: @small sphinx
100 points go to 9th place: @dull arrow
100 points go to 10th place: @fiery belfry

Thanks for Playing Everyone!

#

Registration is open!
Type bb!register to join the next battle!
The battle will start at the next 30 minute mark (e.g. 1:30, 2:30, 3:30).

small sphinx Mar 26, 2026, 6:38 AM

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bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 26, 2026, 6:38 AM

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@small sphinx, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

soft lark Mar 26, 2026, 6:59 AM

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bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 26, 2026, 6:59 AM

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@soft lark, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

long vine Mar 26, 2026, 7:02 AM

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bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 26, 2026, 7:02 AM

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@long vine, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

uneven grove Mar 26, 2026, 7:07 AM

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bb!register

gray sky Mar 26, 2026, 7:07 AM

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bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 26, 2026, 7:07 AM

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@uneven grove, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

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@gray sky, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

hardy patio Mar 26, 2026, 7:13 AM

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bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 26, 2026, 7:13 AM

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@hardy patio, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

mossy jolt Mar 26, 2026, 7:22 AM

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bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 26, 2026, 7:22 AM

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@mossy jolt, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

raw moss Mar 26, 2026, 7:24 AM

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bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 26, 2026, 7:24 AM

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@raw moss, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

ashen spire Mar 26, 2026, 7:27 AM

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bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 26, 2026, 7:27 AM

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@ashen spire, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

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Registration will be closing in about 30 seconds.

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There are not enough players! A minimum of 10 players are needed to start the battle. We will keep registration open for another hour and then try again.

main ridge Mar 26, 2026, 7:30 AM

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bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 26, 2026, 7:30 AM

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@main ridge, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

uneven grove Mar 26, 2026, 7:40 AM

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bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 26, 2026, 7:40 AM

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@uneven grove, you are already registered for the upcoming battle.

formal badge Mar 26, 2026, 7:46 AM

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bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 26, 2026, 7:46 AM

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@formal badge, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

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@livid shuttle, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

amber ermine Mar 26, 2026, 7:50 AM

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bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 26, 2026, 7:50 AM

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@amber ermine, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

arctic temple Mar 26, 2026, 7:57 AM

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bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 26, 2026, 7:57 AM

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@arctic temple, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

soft lark Mar 26, 2026, 8:11 AM

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bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 26, 2026, 8:11 AM

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@soft lark, you are already registered for the upcoming battle.

analog rapids Mar 26, 2026, 8:12 AM

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bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 26, 2026, 8:12 AM

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@analog rapids, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

fiery belfry Mar 26, 2026, 8:19 AM

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bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 26, 2026, 8:19 AM

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@fiery belfry, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

waxen marlin Mar 26, 2026, 8:21 AM

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bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 26, 2026, 8:21 AM

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@waxen marlin, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

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Registration will be closing in about 30 seconds.

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Registration is now closed!

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Let the battle begin!

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The fighting has begun to die down...

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The fighting has stopped!

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There are 17 players remaining.
@raw moss, @soft lark, @fiery belfry, @long vine, @amber ermine, @small sphinx, @ashen spire, @hardy patio, @waxen marlin, @gray sky, @formal badge, @livid shuttle, @mossy jolt, @main ridge, @arctic temple, @uneven grove, and @analog rapids
Send me a private message to register for the final battle.
We will continue the battle in 2-4 minutes.

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The fighting begins again!

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@raw moss got impaled by Mourning Wood. @raw moss died.

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@main ridge took a French lesson. Afterwards, all they could say were "oui" and "omelette du fromage".

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@gray sky wanted to be a humanitarian, but didn't know what the word meant, so they barbecued @long vine on a spit. @long vine died.

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@amber ermine joined the Old One's Army, in the only way a human could: as a skeleton. @amber ermine died.

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@ashen spire and @mossy jolt had a practice fight with novelty weapons.

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@uneven grove gazed at clouds with @soft lark. One cloud looked like a bunny, one looked like a dragon, and one looked like a floating island with treasure on it. But that was just their imagination, probably.

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@formal badge explored several cave systems, not realizing that they were just exploring same cave system because their memory was poor.

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@analog rapids tried hunting butterflies with a Sniper Rifle.

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@small sphinx dug deep underground and found a weird skeleton who was selling toys for some reason.

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@waxen marlin didn't have a Temple Key, so they decided to Kool-Aid Man their way through the door. Oh, yeahhh! Then they were met with a mob of Lihzahrds. Oh, nooo! @waxen marlin died.

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@hardy patio looked through all the battle scenes thus far, trying to make sure that they didn't accidentally miss a pun or a reference.

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@gray sky ate ten million bananas and got radiation poisoning. @gray sky died.

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@formal badge accelerated on a minecart so fast that they managed to travel back in time. Then they spoiled the ending to a TV series that @main ridge was watching. @formal badge died.

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@analog rapids tried to memorize the Guide to Plant Fiber Cordage, but had a rough time because it was full of weird words like "gibberellin" and "sclerenchyma".

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@livid shuttle tried to explore the Snow biome, but accidentally fell into an ice-cold pool of water and froze into a solid ice sculpture. @livid shuttle died.

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@arctic temple wondered why Rain Cloud blocks never run out of water.

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@mossy jolt hid in a grave. They looked exactly like a corpse. They even turned pale and stopped their breathing and heartbeat, too. What a talented actor! @mossy jolt died.

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@main ridge challenged the Eater of Worlds to an eating contest. They lost, in more ways than one. @main ridge died.

#

@arctic temple put a toilet paper roll into the toilet paper holder the wrong way and was sentenced to death by toilet swirly. @arctic temple died.

#

@ashen spire cut through @analog rapids with a glowing 1000 degree knife. @analog rapids died.

#

After partying all night, @ashen spire was shot by @small sphinx in a swimming pool. @ashen spire died.

#

@uneven grove befriended a pink slime that they found in a lunch tray in the school cafeteria.

#

A monkey dramatically raised @uneven grove up on a cliff and crowned them the king of Africa. Unfortunately, the monkey accidentally yeeted @uneven grove off said cliff. @uneven grove died.

#

@hardy patio found a strange weapon called a Person Staff, and used it to summon @small sphinx, @fiery belfry, and @soft lark. Then their Summoning Potion buff expired. @soft lark died.

#

@hardy patio found a small, shadowy orb that floated around them. They named it Wilson.

#

@fiery belfry found a copper coin on the ground! Oh... it was glued in place.

#

@small sphinx was stomped flat while trying to steal the secret Krabby Patty recipe. @small sphinx died.

#

@fiery belfry was kidnapped and forced to correct hundreds of people's grammatical mistakes.

#

@hardy patio summoned the Destroyer a bit too close to their base with all the NPCs inside. Meanwhile, @fiery belfry felt a great disturbance in the Force, as if twenty-two voices cried out and were suddenly silenced.

#

@fiery belfry learned several useful fashion tips from a stylish giraffe.

#

@hardy patio made up their own language and used it to threaten @fiery belfry, who simply scratched their head.

#

@fiery belfry tried to attack @hardy patio with a Spectre Staff, but the shots homed in on a nearby Wraith instead.

#

@fiery belfry overwhelmed @hardy patio with a storm of flying bananas. @hardy patio died.

#

The battle is over!

#

The Winner is @fiery belfry!

Prize Time!

1000 points go to 1st place: @fiery belfry
500 points go to 2nd place: @hardy patio
250 points go to 3rd place: @small sphinx
150 points go to 4th place: @soft lark
150 points go to 5th place: @uneven grove
150 points go to 6th place: @ashen spire
100 points go to 7th place: @analog rapids
100 points go to 8th place: @arctic temple
100 points go to 9th place: @main ridge
100 points go to 10th place: @mossy jolt

Thanks for Playing Everyone!

#

Registration is open!
Type bb!register to join the next battle!
The battle will start at the next 30 minute mark (e.g. 1:30, 2:30, 3:30).

long vine Mar 26, 2026, 8:40 AM

#

bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 26, 2026, 8:40 AM

#

@long vine, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

amber ermine Mar 26, 2026, 8:40 AM

#

bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 26, 2026, 8:40 AM

#

@amber ermine, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

#

@livid shuttle, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

analog rapids Mar 26, 2026, 8:43 AM

#

bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 26, 2026, 8:43 AM

#

@analog rapids, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

soft lark Mar 26, 2026, 8:44 AM

#

bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 26, 2026, 8:44 AM

#

@soft lark, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

gray sky Mar 26, 2026, 8:47 AM

#

bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 26, 2026, 8:47 AM

#

@gray sky, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

fiery belfry Mar 26, 2026, 8:51 AM

#

bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 26, 2026, 8:51 AM

#

@fiery belfry, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

uneven grove Mar 26, 2026, 8:55 AM

#

bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 26, 2026, 8:55 AM

#

@uneven grove, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

hardy patio Mar 26, 2026, 8:55 AM

#

bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 26, 2026, 8:55 AM

#

@hardy patio, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

tranquil wyvern Mar 26, 2026, 9:13 AM

#

bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 26, 2026, 9:13 AM

#

@tranquil wyvern, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

formal badge Mar 26, 2026, 9:14 AM

#

bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 26, 2026, 9:14 AM

#

@formal badge, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

small sphinx Mar 26, 2026, 9:17 AM

#

bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 26, 2026, 9:17 AM

#

@small sphinx, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

raw moss Mar 26, 2026, 9:26 AM

#

bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 26, 2026, 9:26 AM

#

@raw moss, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

#

Registration will be closing in about 30 seconds.

brave shore Mar 26, 2026, 9:30 AM

#

bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 26, 2026, 9:30 AM

#

@brave shore, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

chrome dagger Mar 26, 2026, 9:30 AM

#

bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 26, 2026, 9:30 AM

#

@chrome dagger, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

#

Registration is now closed!

#

Let the battle begin!

#

The fighting has begun to die down...

#

The fighting has stopped!

#

There are 15 players remaining.
@raw moss, @chrome dagger, @soft lark, @fiery belfry, @tranquil wyvern, @long vine, @amber ermine, @small sphinx, @hardy patio, @gray sky, @livid shuttle, @formal badge, @brave shore, @uneven grove, and @analog rapids
Send me a private message to register for the final battle.
We will continue the battle in 2-4 minutes.

#

The fighting begins again!

#

@soft lark tried to save @formal badge's life by pushing them out of the way of an oncoming truck. However, it was actually just a slow-moving tractor, and @soft lark died of shock, believing that they had been run over. @soft lark died.

#

@long vine was conveniently flattened by a falling tombstone that had their name engraved on it. @long vine died.

#

@amber ermine wished for the ability to fly. @livid shuttle granted their wish by turning them into a Hardcore ghost. @amber ermine died.

#

@uneven grove started chugging Ale and showed no signs of stopping.

#

@analog rapids was taken by surprise by a zombie while walking outside, but the zombie simply ignored them and kept walking while moaning "Braaaains".

#

Tired of eating plain toast, @small sphinx started trying to extract butter from butterflies.

#

While riding on minecart rails, @small sphinx accelerated to the point of creating a singularity. @small sphinx died.

#

@raw moss invented a weird drink that they called "cough-E". Everyone became addicted to it.

#

@fiery belfry explored a Living Tree only to find nothing useful, but after they left, they noticed a small Finch was resting on their head.

#

@chrome dagger tried farming for a Slime Staff by placing a Slime Statue near a naturally generated trap and jumping on the pressure plate over and over.

#

@hardy patio saw the light at the end of the tunnel. Unfortunately, it was actually a lifeform disintegration rainbow. @hardy patio died.

#

@fiery belfry made a low quality meme, which blew up overnight and made @fiery belfry rich and famous.

#

@livid shuttle activated an Enchanted Sundial to see if it really accelerated time in real life by a day. It technically worked, as their local time was 11:59 pm.

#

@livid shuttle was attacked by a goblin army, and couldn't fend them off because they partied too hard the previous night. @livid shuttle died.

#

@analog rapids tried to eat a Fruitcake Chakram, but stopped because it didn't taste all that great.

#

@formal badge was impaled by a stream of frozen urine that had leaked out of a passing jet plane. @formal badge died.

#

@tranquil wyvern watched as the Nurse repeatedly injected herself with needles to avoid drowning. They would try to help, but something about it was kind of mesmerizing.

#

@brave shore took their safety for granite while falling down a hellevator, and got crushed by a Granite Elemental. @brave shore died.

#

@gray sky used a calculator to determine their exact odds of winning, and didn't like what they saw. At least they didn't die in this scene.

#

Through the mighty winds of the desert, @gray sky saw an anonymous figure rising from the sand dunes. When they looked closer, they saw it had no face! They tried to get closer, but @uneven grove stabbed them in the back. @gray sky died.

#

@analog rapids was dismayed to discover that there was no toilet paper in the toilet paper holder.

#

@analog rapids defeated Duke Fishron without taking a single hit, but got their head bitten off by a Sharkron after winning the fight. @analog rapids died.

#

@tranquil wyvern received an injection of unicorn magic from a unicorn. @tranquil wyvern died.

#

@chrome dagger reeled in a huge fish while out on a fishing trip, but it turned out to be @raw moss in a Fish costume.

#

@uneven grove descended into the Dungeon only to discover a mysterious dead end. They left, thinking the entire Dungeon forgot to generate.

#

@fiery belfry shot @chrome dagger in the back of the head after reassuring them that they would live peacefully on a farm together and raise rabbits. @chrome dagger died.

#

@raw moss invented a shrinking machine! They tested it on @uneven grove, who shrunk until they were smaller than atoms, and then got squashed by an air molecule. @uneven grove died.

#

@raw moss was exploring the dungeon when they found the Mechanic, Goblin Tinkerer, and Wizard all tied up in the same place. It looked like they were having fun, so @raw moss let them be.

#

@fiery belfry tried developing a technique called "respawning", but was silenced permanently before they could finish. Such powers are too dangerous to exist in this world. @fiery belfry died.

#

The battle is over!

#

The Winner is @raw moss!

Prize Time!

1000 points go to 1st place: @raw moss
500 points go to 2nd place: @fiery belfry
250 points go to 3rd place: @uneven grove
150 points go to 4th place: @chrome dagger
150 points go to 5th place: @tranquil wyvern
150 points go to 6th place: @analog rapids
100 points go to 7th place: @gray sky
100 points go to 8th place: @brave shore
100 points go to 9th place: @formal badge
100 points go to 10th place: @livid shuttle

Thanks for Playing Everyone!

#

Registration is open!
Type bb!register to join the next battle!
The battle will start at the next 30 minute mark (e.g. 1:30, 2:30, 3:30).

raw moss Mar 26, 2026, 9:39 AM

#

bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 26, 2026, 9:39 AM

#

@raw moss, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

long vine Mar 26, 2026, 9:52 AM

#

brave shore bb!register

bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 26, 2026, 9:52 AM

#

@long vine, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

brave shore Mar 26, 2026, 9:53 AM

#

bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 26, 2026, 9:53 AM

#

@brave shore, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

amber ermine Mar 26, 2026, 9:53 AM

#

bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 26, 2026, 9:53 AM

#

@amber ermine, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

soft lark Mar 26, 2026, 9:53 AM

#

bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 26, 2026, 9:53 AM

#

@soft lark, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

mossy jolt Mar 26, 2026, 9:56 AM

#

bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 26, 2026, 9:56 AM

#

@mossy jolt, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

tranquil wyvern Mar 26, 2026, 10:04 AM

#

bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 26, 2026, 10:04 AM

#

@tranquil wyvern, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

fiery belfry Mar 26, 2026, 10:06 AM

#

soft lark bb!register

bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 26, 2026, 10:06 AM

#

@fiery belfry, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

hardy patio Mar 26, 2026, 10:07 AM

#

bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 26, 2026, 10:07 AM

#

@hardy patio, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

gray sky Mar 26, 2026, 10:09 AM

#

bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 26, 2026, 10:09 AM

#

@gray sky, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

steel sentinel Mar 26, 2026, 10:11 AM

#

bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 26, 2026, 10:11 AM

#

@steel sentinel, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

waxen marlin Mar 26, 2026, 10:16 AM

#

bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 26, 2026, 10:16 AM

#

@waxen marlin, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

proper wedge Mar 26, 2026, 10:23 AM

#

bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 26, 2026, 10:23 AM

#

@proper wedge, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

formal badge Mar 26, 2026, 10:25 AM

#

bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 26, 2026, 10:25 AM

#

@formal badge, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

hexed notch Mar 26, 2026, 10:25 AM

#

bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 26, 2026, 10:25 AM

#

@hexed notch, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

#

@livid shuttle, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

honest pine Mar 26, 2026, 10:28 AM

#

bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 26, 2026, 10:28 AM

#

@honest pine, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

chrome dagger Mar 26, 2026, 10:29 AM

#

bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 26, 2026, 10:29 AM

#

@chrome dagger, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

#

Registration will be closing in about 30 seconds.

brave shore Mar 26, 2026, 10:30 AM

#

bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 26, 2026, 10:30 AM

#

@brave shore, you are already registered for the upcoming battle.

#

Registration is now closed!

#

Let the battle begin!

#

The fighting has begun to die down...

#

The fighting has stopped!

#

There are 18 players remaining.
@honest pine, @raw moss, @hexed notch, @chrome dagger, @soft lark, @fiery belfry, @proper wedge, @long vine, @tranquil wyvern, @amber ermine, @steel sentinel, @hardy patio, @waxen marlin, @gray sky, @formal badge, @livid shuttle, @mossy jolt, and @brave shore
Send me a private message to register for the final battle.
We will continue the battle in 2-4 minutes.

#

The fighting begins again!

#

@hexed notch got a dartboard pattern tattooed on the back of their head. @honest pine got a Dart Rifle from a Corrupt Mimic and started looking for something to test it on. @hexed notch died.

#

@chrome dagger stepped on a Pressure Plate while exploring the Lihzahrd Temple and was burnt to a crisp. @chrome dagger died.

#

@fiery belfry saw the fattest cat ever, and was unable to escape from its crushing gravitational pull. @fiery belfry died.

#

@proper wedge used a Recall Potion while fighting Wall of Flesh. @proper wedge died.

#

@long vine was ordered by @formal badge to sing a song or be killed. @long vine tried to sing the parody song "Revenge" and got killed immediately. @long vine died.

#

@amber ermine tried to ride on the Eye of Cthulhu. The Eye of Cthulhu didn't like that very much. @amber ermine died.

#

@raw moss decided to count the total number of blocks in their world. Good luck!

#

@waxen marlin thought it would be funny to put a fish in the Nurse's dresser. The Nurse thought it would be funny to replace all of @waxen marlin's potions with Red Potions. @waxen marlin died.

#

@hardy patio used the word "whom" in a grammatically appropriate context, and instantly gained several IQ points.

#

@brave shore climbed a tree without using their arms.

#

@soft lark wanted to start a band, and recruited @steel sentinel as their keyboard player. @steel sentinel showed up to their first practice session with a QWERTY keyboard.

#

@formal badge was hired as a bodyguard by the Nurse to defend her from the Arms Dealer's unwelcome approaches.

#

@gray sky tried to escape from their pursuer by playing dead. Unfortunately for them, their pursuer was a boulder. @gray sky died.

#

@raw moss tried to take the square root of their previous answer on a scientific calculator, and somehow summoned a shoe.

#

@formal badge learned that they had an iodine deficiency, so they tried to make up for it by eating a few containers of iodized salt. @formal badge died.

#

@livid shuttle and @brave shore played Russian roulette. Well, not exactly. They were just playing roulette in Russia. No one was harmed.

#

@livid shuttle took refuge underneath a large Christmas tree. Or at least, it looked like a Christmas tree at first. @livid shuttle died.

#

A zombie snuck up on @mossy jolt and gave them a big hug! Unfortunately for them, zombies deal contact damage. @mossy jolt died.

#

@hardy patio's homework attempted to eat their Dog. Fortunately, they were able to free the dog from the homework. Homework died.

#

@raw moss threw a block of cheese at an invading Martian Saucer.

#

@brave shore pointed a Shotgun at @honest pine and pulled the trigger, but nothing happened. Confused, @brave shore looked into the barrel and pulled the trigger again. @brave shore died.

#

@soft lark found a Life Fruit and carefully broke it. It fell into a pit full of Angry Trappers.

#

@honest pine was carried away by an army of Cheerios and thrown into a milk volcano. @honest pine died.

#

@tranquil wyvern dipped their toes into a lake. Sadly the lake froze, so @tranquil wyvern is going to be stuck there for a while.

#

In a bizarre turn of events, @tranquil wyvern was flattened by a road roller. @tranquil wyvern died.

#

@steel sentinel blew @soft lark to bits using an exploding bed. @soft lark died.

#

@hardy patio called @steel sentinel a stinky butt, but forgot that they still had PvP turned on. @hardy patio died.

#

@steel sentinel accidentally fell off a sky island and tried to use their Rod of Discord to avoid death. It didn't stop the momentum. @steel sentinel died.

#

The battle is over!

#

The Winner is @raw moss!

Prize Time!

1000 points go to 1st place: @raw moss
500 points go to 2nd place: @steel sentinel
250 points go to 3rd place: @hardy patio
150 points go to 4th place: @soft lark
150 points go to 5th place: @tranquil wyvern
150 points go to 6th place: @honest pine
100 points go to 7th place: @brave shore
100 points go to 8th place: @mossy jolt
100 points go to 9th place: @livid shuttle
100 points go to 10th place: @formal badge

Thanks for Playing Everyone!

#

Registration is open!
Type bb!register to join the next battle!
The battle will start at the next 30 minute mark (e.g. 1:30, 2:30, 3:30).

brave shore Mar 26, 2026, 10:38 AM

#

bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 26, 2026, 10:38 AM

#

@brave shore, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

soft lark Mar 26, 2026, 10:40 AM

#

bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 26, 2026, 10:40 AM

#

@soft lark, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

raw moss Mar 26, 2026, 10:41 AM

#

bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 26, 2026, 10:41 AM

#

@raw moss, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

waxen marlin Mar 26, 2026, 10:45 AM

#

bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 26, 2026, 10:45 AM

#

@waxen marlin, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

gray sky Mar 26, 2026, 10:46 AM

#

bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 26, 2026, 10:46 AM

#

@gray sky, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

steel sentinel Mar 26, 2026, 10:47 AM

#

bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 26, 2026, 10:47 AM

#

@steel sentinel, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

mossy jolt Mar 26, 2026, 10:48 AM

#

bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 26, 2026, 10:48 AM

#

@mossy jolt, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

long vine Mar 26, 2026, 10:49 AM

#

bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 26, 2026, 10:49 AM

#

@long vine, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

arctic temple Mar 26, 2026, 10:51 AM

#

bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 26, 2026, 10:51 AM

#

@arctic temple, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

hardy patio Mar 26, 2026, 10:53 AM

#

bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 26, 2026, 10:53 AM

#

@hardy patio, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

brave shore Mar 26, 2026, 10:54 AM

#

bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 26, 2026, 10:54 AM

#

@brave shore, you are already registered for the upcoming battle.

empty ocean Mar 26, 2026, 10:55 AM

#

bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 26, 2026, 10:55 AM

#

@empty ocean, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

hexed notch Mar 26, 2026, 11:02 AM

#

bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 26, 2026, 11:02 AM

#

@hexed notch, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

tranquil wyvern Mar 26, 2026, 11:08 AM

#

bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 26, 2026, 11:08 AM

#

@tranquil wyvern, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

undone notch Mar 26, 2026, 11:13 AM

#

bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 26, 2026, 11:13 AM

#

@undone notch, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

rare gust Mar 26, 2026, 11:14 AM

#

bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 26, 2026, 11:14 AM

#

@rare gust, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

fiery belfry Mar 26, 2026, 11:23 AM

#

bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 26, 2026, 11:23 AM

#

@fiery belfry, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

formal badge Mar 26, 2026, 11:24 AM

#

bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 26, 2026, 11:24 AM

#

@formal badge, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

unkempt osprey Mar 26, 2026, 11:25 AM

#

bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 26, 2026, 11:25 AM

#

@unkempt osprey, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

#

Registration will be closing in about 30 seconds.

#

Registration is now closed!

#

Let the battle begin!

#

The fighting has begun to die down...

#

The fighting has stopped!

#

There are 18 players remaining.
@empty ocean, @undone notch, @hexed notch, @raw moss, @unkempt osprey, @soft lark, @fiery belfry, @long vine, @rare gust, @tranquil wyvern, @steel sentinel, @hardy patio, @waxen marlin, @gray sky, @formal badge, @mossy jolt, @brave shore, and @arctic temple
Send me a private message to register for the final battle.
We will continue the battle in 2-4 minutes.

#

The fighting begins again!

#

@raw moss talked with @tranquil wyvern about their evil plans while noisily eating a box of fried chicken.

#

@empty ocean found the Last Prism. Then @rare gust found another one, meaning that @empty ocean's weapon was actually the Second-to-Last Prism.

#

@fiery belfry went on vacation to a place that was said to be a "green land", but it was actually an empty wasteland full of ice.

#

@steel sentinel accidentally let a zombie in, but it happily left after @steel sentinel allowed it to eat the Guide's brains.

#

@soft lark tried to kill @gray sky by hitting them on the head with a TV, but only ended up giving them a free Video Visage vanity helmet.

#

@hardy patio and @unkempt osprey built a Chinese restaurant together in an effort to pay off their reforging debts.

#

@empty ocean made a loading icon spin so fast that it became a circle, flying off their screen like a frisbee and smacking them in the face! @empty ocean died.

#

@formal badge woke up in an unknown forest. At first they panicked, but then they remembered that this happens every time you spawn in Terraria.

#

@undone notch went outside during a storm, hoping to find the world's largest hailstone. Their body was found in a small, water-filled crater a few days later. @undone notch died.

#

@raw moss tripped over their shoelace and fell into the sky. @raw moss died.

#

@soft lark accidentally dropped a stick of Dynamite near Plantera's Bulb before they were finished excavating their arena. @soft lark died.

#

@waxen marlin tried to fly, but forgot that their wings were in the vanity slot. @waxen marlin died.

#

@arctic temple couldn't count and accidentally ordered 87 watermelons. On the bright side, they were featured in a math textbook.

#

@gray sky stuck their face into a pool of lava to see if it was really as hot as everyone said. Yes, it was. @gray sky died.

#

@long vine suddenly realized that "hitherto" is pronounced "hither-two" and not "hit-her-toe". The way they were pronouncing it in their head had been hitherto incorrect.

#

@mossy jolt hid a Water Candle and some Lihzahrd Bricks underneath @brave shore's house. @brave shore started wondering why all the monsters wouldn't leave them alone.

#

@rare gust tried to sing at the same pitch as Freddie Mercury and ended up shattering all the windows.

#

@hexed notch told @formal badge a joke so funny that they died of laughter. @formal badge died.

#

@arctic temple asked a scarecrow if it wished it had a brain. The scarecrow did not respond.

#

@unkempt osprey decided to give up their violent ways and start a pacifist run, which ended almost immediately after they accidentally used their Shield of Cthulhu dash against a squirrel.

#

@steel sentinel's town was attacked by giant insectoid creatures, but just as they were about to give up hope, a bunch of mechs dropped out of the sky, froze the creatures in ice, and left.

#

@fiery belfry had work to do, but apparently they thought that flying circles around Skeletron was a better use of their time.

#

@steel sentinel tried to assemble an Ankh Shield, but something went wrong and they ended up smashing hundreds upon hundreds of eggs instead.

#

@mossy jolt was checking the books in their bookcase and found they were all blank.

#

@rare gust put a ribbon on their pet's head to make it look cuter. It still looked like a tarantula, though.

#

@hexed notch purchased some Green Paint and painted themselves green. It turned out that they were trying to camouflage themselves in the grass.

#

@mossy jolt was sliced into burger patties by a Martian Saucer. @mossy jolt died.

#

@unkempt osprey drank a Teleportation Potion, but was only teleported ten blocks away.

#

@hardy patio invented a "bulletproof bullet", and started trying to think of situations in which it might be useful.

#

@arctic temple's booty was plundered by pirates. @arctic temple died.

#

Out of boredom, @long vine used a Gravity Globe to repeatedly flip up and down while spinning around in a swivel chair.

#

@rare gust accidentally killed a Voodoo Demon above lava before they were finished with their hellbridge. @rare gust died.

#

@fiery belfry found a Slime Staff and now has a slimy new friend!

#

@tranquil wyvern tried to use forbidden magic to erase @hardy patio from existence. However, they also erased the part of the code that was supposed to make @hardy patio die, so nothing actually happened.

#

@hexed notch jumped higher than their house, but no one was impressed. Houses can't jump, silly.

#

@fiery belfry tried to kill @steel sentinel, but failed to ask for consent.

#

One bat, two bats, Hellbat, Cave Bat. @hexed notch was surrounded on every side! Sure, it was a fun riddle, but it wasn't the greatest situation @hexed notch had ever been in. @hexed notch died.

#

@brave shore ran around catching fireflies and accidentally fell off a cliff. Fortunately for @brave shore, @unkempt osprey broke their fall with their own body. @unkempt osprey died.

#

Several players decided to form a band. @brave shore was the trumpet, @hardy patio was the clarinetist, @tranquil wyvern was the drummer, and @fiery belfry was the drum. @fiery belfry died.

#

@steel sentinel was about to test the theory that goblins "could start a war over cloth", but @long vine stopped them in time.

#

@tranquil wyvern was shot by a Golden Bullet and found out that they have a heart of gold. @tranquil wyvern died.

#

Instead of spending 6 minutes washing the dishes manually, @hardy patio spent 6 hours failing to automate the process.

#

@brave shore found some Diamond Ore. @long vine quickly stole it, but they then realized they were playing the wrong game.

#

@steel sentinel started wondering if the Marrow could be used by vegetarians.

#

@hardy patio took too much time while looting a Water Chest. @hardy patio died.

#

@long vine wrote @brave shore's name in a suspicious-looking notebook. @brave shore died.

#

@long vine ordered lunch at a restaurant. The waitress handed them the plate and said, "enjoy your meal." @long vine said "thanks, you too." @long vine died.

#

The battle is over!

#

The Winner is @steel sentinel!

Prize Time!

1000 points go to 1st place: @steel sentinel
500 points go to 2nd place: @long vine
250 points go to 3rd place: @brave shore
150 points go to 4th place: @hardy patio
150 points go to 5th place: @tranquil wyvern
150 points go to 6th place: @fiery belfry
100 points go to 7th place: @unkempt osprey
100 points go to 8th place: @hexed notch
100 points go to 9th place: @rare gust
100 points go to 10th place: @arctic temple

Thanks for Playing Everyone!

#

Registration is open!
Type bb!register to join the next battle!
The battle will start at the next 30 minute mark (e.g. 1:30, 2:30, 3:30).

#

@waxen marlin, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

#

@fiery belfry, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

#

@hardy patio, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

#

@long vine, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

brave shore Mar 26, 2026, 11:43 AM

#

bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 26, 2026, 11:43 AM

#

@brave shore, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

raw moss Mar 26, 2026, 11:43 AM

#

bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 26, 2026, 11:43 AM

#

@raw moss, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

proud lava Mar 26, 2026, 11:45 AM

#

bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 26, 2026, 11:45 AM

#

@proud lava, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

tranquil wyvern Mar 26, 2026, 11:46 AM

#

bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 26, 2026, 11:46 AM

#

@tranquil wyvern, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

undone notch Mar 26, 2026, 11:48 AM

#

bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 26, 2026, 11:48 AM

#

@undone notch, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

oak lantern Mar 26, 2026, 11:50 AM

#

bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 26, 2026, 11:50 AM

#

@oak lantern, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

formal badge Mar 26, 2026, 12:08 PM

#

bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 26, 2026, 12:08 PM

#

@formal badge, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

steel sentinel Mar 26, 2026, 12:21 PM

#

bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 26, 2026, 12:21 PM

#

@steel sentinel, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

small sphinx Mar 26, 2026, 12:28 PM

#

bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 26, 2026, 12:28 PM

#

@small sphinx, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

unkempt osprey Mar 26, 2026, 12:29 PM

#

bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 26, 2026, 12:29 PM

#

@unkempt osprey, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

hexed notch Mar 26, 2026, 12:29 PM

#

bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 26, 2026, 12:29 PM

#

@hexed notch, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

#

Registration will be closing in about 30 seconds.

#

Registration is now closed!

#

Let the battle begin!

#

The fighting has begun to die down...

#

The fighting has stopped!

#

There are 15 players remaining.
@undone notch, @hexed notch, @raw moss, @unkempt osprey, @fiery belfry, @oak lantern, @long vine, @tranquil wyvern, @small sphinx, @proud lava, @steel sentinel, @hardy patio, @waxen marlin, @formal badge, and @brave shore
Send me a private message to register for the final battle.
We will continue the battle in 2-4 minutes.

#

The fighting begins again!

#

@undone notch practiced swallowing swords, but eventually tried swallowing a Breaker Blade. @undone notch died.

#

@small sphinx played piano to a tree, hoping that it would make it grow faster.

#

Within the deepest depths of the Dungeon, @waxen marlin randomly found a baby cradle that contained a fancy pair of rainbow-coloured boots.

#

@oak lantern died. Wait, isn't that supposed to go at the end of the scene? Sorry, let me fix that. There we go. @oak lantern died.

#

@formal badge tried solving the global warming crisis by using dark magic to store carbon dioxide in water. This had little impact on the crisis, but it made @formal badge extremely rich.

#

@hexed notch started stressing out while trying to perfectly sort their chests.

#

@brave shore tried to smash a watermelon with a stick while blindfolded, but missed and ended up smashing @proud lava's head instead. @proud lava died.

#

@tranquil wyvern baited their fishing pole with a carrot, hoping to catch a Bunnyfish. Instead, they caught a Balloon Pufferfish.

#

@hardy patio challenged @long vine to a duel. Unfortunately for them, Mom said that it was @long vine's turn to win. @hardy patio died.

#

@waxen marlin ate some pufferfish sashimi because they heard that it was to die for. @waxen marlin died.

#

@brave shore saved the world from a meteor by commanding their Stardust Dragon to destroy it.

#

@raw moss built a village for some elves, not realizing that those elves were actually taller than humans. It was a little awkward.

#

@formal badge fought an unknown anomaly, but as soon as they struck their sword inside it, they mysteriously disappeared. Must be some sort of a glitch. @formal badge died.

#

@long vine had a strange dream about three mysterious ghosts, and after waking up, they decided to be generous and kind to everyone! Meanwhile, the Tax Collector was his usual grumpy self that day.

#

@small sphinx tried to hook onto a Martian Walker to use it as a mount, and was taken for a wild ride before they were eventually thrown off.

#

@unkempt osprey filled in a form to enter a spelling bee, but accidentally misspelled their own name.

#

@tranquil wyvern promised @brave shore that their hellevator had water at the bottom. @brave shore died.

#

@steel sentinel and @hexed notch found what appeared to be a magical cursed board game. They decided not to play. Not because it was scary, but because board games are boring.

#

@long vine found a special chest containing a powerful, legendary magic item! It was the... To unlock the remainder of this scene, please purchase a premium subscription for $7.99.

#

@raw moss accidentally smashed a Truffle Worm with the Shield of Cthulhu.

#

@small sphinx felt an unbearable itch on their back while they were mining, so they scratched it with their Shroomite Digging Claws. @small sphinx died.

#

@unkempt osprey spent some time watching a Zombie kick its own head around.

#

@hexed notch playfully poked @unkempt osprey and laughed. @unkempt osprey playfully poked them back with a Cobalt Naginata. @hexed notch died.

#

@fiery belfry thought the battle was too boring because not enough stuff was on fire, so they equipped Molten Armor and started spraying flames everywhere with a Flamethrower.

#

@unkempt osprey was looking kind of dumb after @long vine's rifle shot punched a hole in the shape of an L on their forehead. @unkempt osprey died.

#

@fiery belfry activated their souped-up Jetpack, and their upper torso blasted off at maximum speed, leaving the rest of their body behind. @fiery belfry died.

#

Ocram is now available on the PC version of Terraria! @steel sentinel excitedly headed down to fight Ocram in hell, only to discover that it had become a frozen wasteland.

#

@raw moss started approaching the end of the underworld, and the Wall of Flesh was closing in quickly. Fortunately, the scene ended before it caught up to them.

#

@tranquil wyvern realized that they had forgotten their favorite teddy bear at home, and they couldn't go on without it. @tranquil wyvern died.

#

@long vine iwwegawy owoed to @steel sentinel and waw cauwught by the pwolice. Ono! @long vine died.

#

@steel sentinel was yelled at by the head chef for preparing a steak that was so raw, it ran away and impaled @raw moss with its horns. @raw moss died.

#

The battle is over!

#

The Winner is @steel sentinel!

Prize Time!

1000 points go to 1st place: @steel sentinel
500 points go to 2nd place: @raw moss
250 points go to 3rd place: @long vine
150 points go to 4th place: @tranquil wyvern
150 points go to 5th place: @fiery belfry
150 points go to 6th place: @unkempt osprey
100 points go to 7th place: @hexed notch
100 points go to 8th place: @small sphinx
100 points go to 9th place: @brave shore
100 points go to 10th place: @formal badge

Thanks for Playing Everyone!

#

Registration is open!
Type bb!register to join the next battle!
The battle will start at the next 30 minute mark (e.g. 1:30, 2:30, 3:30).

long vine Mar 26, 2026, 12:45 PM

#

bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 26, 2026, 12:45 PM

#

@long vine, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

near mortar Mar 26, 2026, 12:45 PM

#

bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 26, 2026, 12:45 PM

#

@near mortar, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

small sphinx Mar 26, 2026, 12:46 PM

#

bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 26, 2026, 12:46 PM

#

@small sphinx, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

undone notch Mar 26, 2026, 12:58 PM

#

bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 26, 2026, 12:58 PM

#

@undone notch, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

fiery belfry Mar 26, 2026, 12:59 PM

#

bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 26, 2026, 12:59 PM

#

@fiery belfry, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

steel sentinel Mar 26, 2026, 1:02 PM

#

bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 26, 2026, 1:02 PM

#

@steel sentinel, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

vernal fox Mar 26, 2026, 1:03 PM

#

bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 26, 2026, 1:03 PM

#

@vernal fox, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

oak lantern Mar 26, 2026, 1:08 PM

#

bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 26, 2026, 1:08 PM

#

@oak lantern, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

mossy jolt Mar 26, 2026, 1:13 PM

#

bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 26, 2026, 1:13 PM

#

@mossy jolt, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

gleaming groveBOT Mar 26, 2026, 1:30 PM

#

Registration will be closing in about 30 seconds.

#

There are not enough players! A minimum of 10 players are needed to start the battle. We will keep registration open for another hour and then try again.

amber ermine Mar 26, 2026, 1:35 PM

#

bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 26, 2026, 1:35 PM

#

@amber ermine, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

gray sky Mar 26, 2026, 1:43 PM

#

bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 26, 2026, 1:43 PM

#

@gray sky, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

main ridge Mar 26, 2026, 1:45 PM

#

bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 26, 2026, 1:45 PM

#

@main ridge, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

uneven grove Mar 26, 2026, 2:10 PM

#

bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 26, 2026, 2:10 PM

#

@uneven grove, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

raw moss Mar 26, 2026, 2:13 PM

#

bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 26, 2026, 2:13 PM

#

@raw moss, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

carmine cairn Mar 26, 2026, 2:24 PM

#

bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 26, 2026, 2:24 PM

#

@carmine cairn, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

#

Registration will be closing in about 30 seconds.

waxen marlin Mar 26, 2026, 2:30 PM

#

bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 26, 2026, 2:30 PM

#

@waxen marlin, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

#

Registration is now closed!

#

Let the battle begin!

#

The fighting has begun to die down...

#

The fighting has stopped!

#

There are 16 players remaining.
@carmine cairn, @undone notch, @raw moss, @fiery belfry, @long vine, @oak lantern, @amber ermine, @small sphinx, @steel sentinel, @vernal fox, @waxen marlin, @gray sky, @main ridge, @mossy jolt, @uneven grove, and @near mortar
Send me a private message to register for the final battle.
We will continue the battle in 2-4 minutes.

#

The fighting begins again!

#

@amber ermine constructed an igloo out of ice blocks and glue.

#

@undone notch invented a weapon that could launch black holes! They fired it once and immediately got spaghettified. @undone notch died.

#

@uneven grove encountered a Diabolist that could apparently only cast one spell before passing out on the floor. @uneven grove decided not to kill it because they felt sorry for it.

#

@steel sentinel created a bold and brash masterpiece of a painting. Sadly, no one seemed to recognize @steel sentinel's artistic genius.

#

@long vine was struck by a falling star. Such incredible luck! @long vine died.

#

@gray sky painted the Snow biome yellow.

#

@mossy jolt found a Strange Brew and decided that it was too strange to drink.

#

@main ridge stole @vernal fox's lunch money and used a Gravitation Potion to fly up and out of reach. @vernal fox was hurt, but only emotionally.

#

@oak lantern relaezid taht slpel-ckehcers are orevaretd bceusae the hmuan mnid can uesdtannrd msot wdors as lnog as the frsit and lsat ltteer are in the rhgit pclae.

#

@small sphinx wanted to make dinner, but there was nothing in the fridge.

#

@near mortar was forced to work for a raccoon in order to pay off their housing debts.

#

@oak lantern mistook @fiery belfry's Leaf Blower for a novelty weapon. @oak lantern died.

#

@carmine cairn snacked on some delicious glue and can no longer speak.

#

@near mortar built a luxurious bathroom for the Guide to live in.

#

@steel sentinel wondered why players sink in lava, despite the fact that lava is liquid rock and therefore several times denser than water.

#

@amber ermine started spamming the chat with boss summoning messages, until King Slime squashed them. @amber ermine died.

#

@vernal fox was expelled from their friend group because they wouldn't stop playing as annoying characters in fighting games.

#

@small sphinx asked @raw moss to make them a sandwich, so they put together some rye bread, Marmite, swiss cheese, toaster strudels, kimchi, and Carolina Reapers. @small sphinx died.

#

@steel sentinel breathed in too much silt and was diagnosed with mesothelioma. Their loved ones may be entitled to financial compensation. @steel sentinel died.

#

@mossy jolt donned a Martian costume and chased @vernal fox in a UFO while firing lasers and pretending not to understand their screams for mercy. @vernal fox died.

#

@main ridge started wondering why they were still here. Just to suffer?

#

@uneven grove lured @waxen marlin into a dangerous trap. The trap consisted of a dusty room that triggered @waxen marlin's dust allergy! @waxen marlin died.

#

@mossy jolt tried renting out an epic battle scene to say whatever they wanted, but sadly, opinions aren't allowed on the internet.

#

@gray sky didn't know whether to take out Spazmatism or Retinazer first, so they compromised by trying to spread the damage evenly between both of them. As a result, @gray sky died.

#

@main ridge tried going up, up, down, down, left, right, left, and right, hoping that something cool would happen. They stepped on a pressure plate and got caught in a fiery explosion, which I guess was pretty cool. @main ridge died.

#

@raw moss discovered that an Autohammer could be used to turn platinum coins into platinum bars. They somewhat regretted making this discovery.

#

@fiery belfry summoned and killed the Eye of Cthulhu over and over. Just how many eyes does Cthulhu even have?

#

@carmine cairn flexed so hard on @mossy jolt that they squeezed them to death with pure muscle. @mossy jolt died.

#

@near mortar tried eating an onion ring while they were still wearing a Spider-Man costume.

#

Hey @near mortar, are you worried that you'll die in this scene? You're right! @near mortar died.

#

@uneven grove ate too much Grub Soup, and their lifeless body was later discovered slouched over on the toilet. @uneven grove died.

#

@fiery belfry tried to make a portal using obsidian but nothing happened.

#

@carmine cairn found a buffalo that couldn't fly because it didn't have wings, and they felt sorry for it.

#

@raw moss offered to add a gold trim to @fiery belfry's armour, but it was a scam and they ended up stealing it.

#

There once was a @fiery belfry who swallowed a fly. They swallowed a spider to catch the fly. They swallowed a bird to catch the spider. They swallowed a cat to catch the bird. They swallowed... oh. It looks like the cat scratched @fiery belfry's insides, and all the animals were freed. @fiery belfry died.

#

@raw moss was climbing a rope, but the rope snapped from their weight. @raw moss barely had any time to feel offended before getting pasted against the rocks below. @raw moss died.

#

The battle is over!

#

The Winner is @carmine cairn!

Prize Time!

1000 points go to 1st place: @carmine cairn
500 points go to 2nd place: @raw moss
250 points go to 3rd place: @fiery belfry
150 points go to 4th place: @uneven grove
150 points go to 5th place: @near mortar
150 points go to 6th place: @mossy jolt
100 points go to 7th place: @main ridge
100 points go to 8th place: @gray sky
100 points go to 9th place: @waxen marlin
100 points go to 10th place: @vernal fox

Thanks for Playing Everyone!

#

Registration is open!
Type bb!register to join the next battle!
The battle will start at the next 30 minute mark (e.g. 1:30, 2:30, 3:30).

oak lantern Mar 26, 2026, 2:41 PM

#

bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 26, 2026, 2:41 PM

#

@oak lantern, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

patent dew Mar 26, 2026, 2:42 PM

#

bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 26, 2026, 2:42 PM

#

@patent dew, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

steel sentinel Mar 26, 2026, 2:42 PM

#

bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 26, 2026, 2:42 PM

#

@steel sentinel, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

uneven grove Mar 26, 2026, 2:43 PM

#

bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 26, 2026, 2:43 PM

#

@uneven grove, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

soft lark Mar 26, 2026, 2:43 PM

#

bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 26, 2026, 2:43 PM

#

@soft lark, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

undone notch Mar 26, 2026, 2:44 PM

#

bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 26, 2026, 2:44 PM

#

@undone notch, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

gray sky Mar 26, 2026, 2:47 PM

#

bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 26, 2026, 2:47 PM

#

@gray sky, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

ionic willow Mar 26, 2026, 2:48 PM

#

bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 26, 2026, 2:48 PM

#

@ionic willow, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

waxen marlin Mar 26, 2026, 2:56 PM

#

bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 26, 2026, 2:56 PM

#

@waxen marlin, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

mossy jolt Mar 26, 2026, 3:01 PM

#

bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 26, 2026, 3:01 PM

#

@mossy jolt, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

formal badge Mar 26, 2026, 3:05 PM

#

bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 26, 2026, 3:05 PM

#

@formal badge, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

jolly swift Mar 26, 2026, 3:21 PM

#

bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 26, 2026, 3:21 PM

#

@jolly swift, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

fiery belfry Mar 26, 2026, 3:25 PM

#

bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 26, 2026, 3:25 PM

#

@fiery belfry, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

carmine cairn Mar 26, 2026, 3:26 PM

#

bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 26, 2026, 3:26 PM

#

@carmine cairn, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

raw moss Mar 26, 2026, 3:26 PM

#

bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 26, 2026, 3:26 PM

#

@raw moss, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

vernal fox Mar 26, 2026, 3:29 PM

#

bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 26, 2026, 3:29 PM

#

@vernal fox, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

#

Registration will be closing in about 30 seconds.

#

Registration is now closed!

#

Let the battle begin!

#

The fighting has begun to die down...

#

The fighting has stopped!

#

There are 16 players remaining.
@carmine cairn, @jolly swift, @undone notch, @raw moss, @soft lark, @fiery belfry, @oak lantern, @patent dew, @steel sentinel, @vernal fox, @waxen marlin, @gray sky, @formal badge, @mossy jolt, @uneven grove, and @ionic willow
Send me a private message to register for the final battle.
We will continue the battle in 2-4 minutes.

#

The fighting begins again!

#

@oak lantern started making lame jokes and spreading them over the internet for fake internet points.

#

@fiery belfry tricked @undone notch into wearing a Bottomless Water Bucket on their head, and barely managed to escape the resulting flood themselves. @undone notch died.

#

@soft lark wrote a poem. "Fireblossom is red, moonglow is blue, I wonder what pressing this button will." That doesn't even rhyme! @soft lark died.

#

@jolly swift accidentally dropped their Terra Blade in a puddle of lava. The weapon was perfectly unharmed, so they just scooped it back out.

#

@uneven grove faintly heard screams echoing from the Dungeon, though it was hard to hear over the sound of buzzing hornets.

#

@oak lantern was running low on health while fighting the Moon Lord, but they were barely able to teleport to the Nurse's house on time. Except the Nurse was actually the Arms Dealer dressed up in the Nurse's clothes. April Fools! @oak lantern died.

#

@patent dew discovered firsthand that they couldn't beat the Twins in a staring contest. @patent dew died.

#

@gray sky and @waxen marlin were laughing together as they headed towards the Dungeon. Their laughter stopped after they stepped into the ocean and realized that they went the wrong way.

#

@carmine cairn pumped @ionic willow full of lead. No one was hurt, but @ionic willow's inventory was filled with Lead Ore.

#

@mossy jolt pranked @steel sentinel by giving them a piece of hair and telling them that they could eat it to gain superpowers.

#

@waxen marlin thought that they bought a Minishark from the Arms Dealer. They had actually bought a live shark from the Angler, which proceeded to eat every limb of their body. @waxen marlin died.

#

@ionic willow wondered which was more complicated: the crafting tree of the Zenith, or Imperial units?

#

@gray sky was jumpscared by the Moon Lord and broke their computer out of surprise. @gray sky died.

#

@steel sentinel knocked on wood. No one was home, so they moved on to the next tree.

#

Queen Bee was minding her own beeswax when she was abruptly impaled by @fiery belfry. Queen Bee died.

#

@formal badge tried to become a stylist. After several clients got their ears cut off, @formal badge quickly abandoned their line of work and fled the country.

#

@formal badge was eaten by a tree. @formal badge died.

#

@vernal fox had a nutty idea, and tried to fire acorns out of a Tactical Shotgun. Obviously, this failed.

#

@jolly swift complained that they had no life, so @vernal fox used a Life Drain to take @mossy jolt's life and give it to @jolly swift. @mossy jolt died.

#

@fiery belfry watched a love story unfold between two bunnies. Several scenes later, both bunnies were dead: one from poison, and the other from a self-inflicted dagger wound.

#

@raw moss underwent a strict training regimen of 100 push-ups, 100 sit-ups, 100 squats, and a 10 kilometer run every day. This training was so intense that all of their hair fell out.

#

After getting pinged by the Epic Battle Dryad Bot, @ionic willow was so badly startled that their soul left their body. @ionic willow died.

#

@carmine cairn got a weird threat over voice chat from someone who claimed to be the "god of thunder".

#

@uneven grove used a Teleportation Potion which teleported them to a Boulder trap, and they didn't realize it until it was too late. @uneven grove died.

#

@vernal fox flirted with the Nurse. The Nurse seemed to be flirting back. Sadly, it turns out that the Nurse was the Moon Lord in disguise, and it proceeded to rip @vernal fox's face off with its bare hands. @vernal fox died.

#

@jolly swift fell asleep in a metronome factory and when they woke up they had completely lost their sense of rhythm.

#

@raw moss and @carmine cairn spotted a Lunar Flare on the floor. They played tug-of-war with it. Nobody won, and the book was ruined.

#

@steel sentinel summoned the Old One's Army while @fiery belfry was building a skybridge, disabling their building abilities and causing them to accidentally walk off the edge. @fiery belfry died.

#

@steel sentinel decided to boldly dive straight into the eye of a hurricane! The winds were calm, the skies were clear, and they were disappointed by how easy it was.

#

A Martian Probe spotted @jolly swift, and called out for a Martian invasion. However, no invasion happened, because the Martians thought @jolly swift was too boring.

#

@raw moss captured a Green Jellyfish, and discovered a substance in its cells that could be useful for future science experiments.

#

@carmine cairn ate a Honey Clock. It was a very time-consuming process.

#

@jolly swift always wanted to be a giraffe, so they tried to make their neck longer. Sadly it didn't go too well, judging by how their head is now rolling on the floor. @jolly swift died.

#

@raw moss tried fighting Plantera with a Lawnmower, thinking that it would deal extra damage. It would have made logical sense if it worked that way, but a Lawnmower is still a Lawnmower. @raw moss died.

#

@steel sentinel was buried under an avalanche that @carmine cairn had triggered using a Firework Rocket. @steel sentinel died.

#

The battle is over!

#

The Winner is @carmine cairn!

Prize Time!

1000 points go to 1st place: @carmine cairn
500 points go to 2nd place: @steel sentinel
250 points go to 3rd place: @raw moss
150 points go to 4th place: @jolly swift
150 points go to 5th place: @fiery belfry
150 points go to 6th place: @vernal fox
100 points go to 7th place: @uneven grove
100 points go to 8th place: @ionic willow
100 points go to 9th place: @mossy jolt
100 points go to 10th place: @formal badge

Thanks for Playing Everyone!

#

Registration is open!
Type bb!register to join the next battle!
The battle will start at the next 30 minute mark (e.g. 1:30, 2:30, 3:30).

waxen marlin Mar 26, 2026, 3:40 PM

#

bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 26, 2026, 3:40 PM

#

@waxen marlin, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

jolly swift Mar 26, 2026, 3:40 PM

#

bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 26, 2026, 3:40 PM

#

@jolly swift, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

steel sentinel Mar 26, 2026, 3:41 PM

#

bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 26, 2026, 3:41 PM

#

@steel sentinel, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

gray sky Mar 26, 2026, 3:42 PM

#

bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 26, 2026, 3:42 PM

#

@gray sky, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

soft lark Mar 26, 2026, 3:45 PM

#

bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 26, 2026, 3:45 PM

#

@soft lark, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

ionic willow Mar 26, 2026, 4:00 PM

#

bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 26, 2026, 4:00 PM

#

@ionic willow, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

tranquil wyvern Mar 26, 2026, 4:08 PM

#

bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 26, 2026, 4:08 PM

#

@tranquil wyvern, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

maiden walrus Mar 26, 2026, 4:19 PM

#

bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 26, 2026, 4:19 PM

#

@maiden walrus, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

carmine cairn Mar 26, 2026, 4:25 PM

#

bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 26, 2026, 4:25 PM

#

@carmine cairn, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

hexed notch Mar 26, 2026, 4:27 PM

#

bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 26, 2026, 4:27 PM

#

@hexed notch, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

#

Registration will be closing in about 30 seconds.

#

Registration is now closed!

#

Let the battle begin!

#

The fighting has begun to die down...

#

The fighting has stopped!

#

There are 10 players remaining.
@carmine cairn, @jolly swift, @hexed notch, @soft lark, @tranquil wyvern, @maiden walrus, @steel sentinel, @waxen marlin, @gray sky, and @ionic willow
Send me a private message to register for the final battle.
We will continue the battle in 2-4 minutes.

#

The fighting begins again!

#

@soft lark smashed a Gravity Globe and fell upward toward space, never to be seen or heard from again. @soft lark died.

#

@maiden walrus was "erased" after accidentally witnessing one of the Arms Dealer's shadier dealings. @maiden walrus died.

#

@steel sentinel crafted @waxen marlin into Flesh Blocks using a Meat Grinder. @waxen marlin died.

#

@gray sky's AC stopped working, and they drowned in their own sweat. @gray sky died.

#

@jolly swift screamed "Believe it!" and ran off into the distance with their arms sticking out backwards. What a weirdo.

#

@ionic willow ate an extra gummy vitamin, and became far too strong. The cops couldn't get them. They were too powerful.

#

@hexed notch was hit by a spell that caused them to read everything backwards! However, they were relieved to see that the Nurse was still named "Hannah" and the Steampunker was still named "Ada".

#

@ionic willow found some soup in their fly.

#

@jolly swift constructed a crab engine and motivated the crabs to keep jumping by playing them their favorite song.

#

@ionic willow cast their spell wrong, accidentally turning themselves into a powerful vampire. The stakes have never been higher! In fact, a couple stakes came flying through the sky and straight into @ionic willow's heart! @ionic willow died.

#

@carmine cairn began screaming, thinking it would increase their power level. It did not.

#

@hexed notch was sawed in half by Skeletron Prime. @tranquil wyvern tried putting @hexed notch back together with Flex Tape, but it didn't work. @hexed notch died.

#

@tranquil wyvern accidentally pressed "Send" before they were finished typing their message, whi

#

@carmine cairn was overcome with both figurative and literal bloodthirst after waking up from a nap with seven mosquito bites.

#

@jolly swift begged for money from the Tax Collector, and received one copper coin.

#

@steel sentinel found a Truffle Worm but couldn't catch it in time.

#

@tranquil wyvern "borrowed" @carmine cairn's bike to escape from a flock of angry sparrows. Much to @carmine cairn's annoyance, the bike was destroyed by lightning before @tranquil wyvern could return it.

#

@jolly swift tried to prove that the world was a sphere, and not a pancake in space. The world is actually a 2D box, but @jolly swift didn't know that.

#

@steel sentinel walked around the shore trying to salvage items from wrecked ships, but only managed to find a slightly sticky bottle of motion sickness pills.

#

@tranquil wyvern went mining hoping to find diamonds, but was only able to find some kind of glowing plant material.

#

@jolly swift brought all of their buffs, but forgot to bring weapons. They couldn't really threaten anyone, but they couldn't really die either.

#

@steel sentinel wasn't taking any chances, and descended their hellevator without letting go of their Umbrella. On the way down, they grew a majestic beard.

#

@jolly swift didn't care to look at their Obsidian Skin buff duration. @jolly swift died.

#

@tranquil wyvern was searching for buried treasure in the wilderness when they were suddenly frozen with ice magic and stabbed to death by a team of 20 people who wanted their spade. @tranquil wyvern died.

#

@carmine cairn launched themselves halfway across the world by repeatedly jumping backwards on a flight of stairs.

#

@carmine cairn rescued @steel sentinel from drowning, but in reverse. @steel sentinel died.

#

The battle is over!

#

The Winner is @carmine cairn!

Prize Time!

1000 points go to 1st place: @carmine cairn
500 points go to 2nd place: @steel sentinel
250 points go to 3rd place: @tranquil wyvern
150 points go to 4th place: @jolly swift
150 points go to 5th place: @hexed notch
150 points go to 6th place: @ionic willow
100 points go to 7th place: @gray sky
100 points go to 8th place: @waxen marlin
100 points go to 9th place: @maiden walrus
100 points go to 10th place: @soft lark

Thanks for Playing Everyone!

#

Registration is open!
Type bb!register to join the next battle!
The battle will start at the next 30 minute mark (e.g. 1:30, 2:30, 3:30).

raw moss Mar 26, 2026, 4:39 PM

#

bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 26, 2026, 4:39 PM

#

@raw moss, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

waxen marlin Mar 26, 2026, 4:41 PM

#

BB!REGISTER

#

bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 26, 2026, 4:41 PM

#

@waxen marlin, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

jolly swift Mar 26, 2026, 4:44 PM

#

bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 26, 2026, 4:44 PM

#

@jolly swift, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

mossy jolt Mar 26, 2026, 4:47 PM

#

bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 26, 2026, 4:47 PM

#

@mossy jolt, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

#

@livid shuttle, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

#

@undone notch, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

tranquil wyvern Mar 26, 2026, 5:04 PM

#

bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 26, 2026, 5:04 PM

#

@tranquil wyvern, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

steel sentinel Mar 26, 2026, 5:06 PM

#

bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 26, 2026, 5:06 PM

#

@steel sentinel, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

carmine cairn Mar 26, 2026, 5:14 PM

#

bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 26, 2026, 5:14 PM

#

@carmine cairn, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

glacial totem Mar 26, 2026, 5:18 PM

#

bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 26, 2026, 5:18 PM

#

@glacial totem, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

strong sierra Mar 26, 2026, 5:26 PM

#

bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 26, 2026, 5:26 PM

#

@strong sierra, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

#

Registration will be closing in about 30 seconds.

#

Registration is now closed!

#

Let the battle begin!

#

The fighting has begun to die down...

#

The fighting has stopped!

#

There are 11 players remaining.
@glacial totem, @carmine cairn, @jolly swift, @undone notch, @raw moss, @tranquil wyvern, @steel sentinel, @waxen marlin, @livid shuttle, @mossy jolt, and @strong sierra
Send me a private message to register for the final battle.
We will continue the battle in 2-4 minutes.

#

The fighting begins again!

#

@glacial totem went outside to marvel at a solar eclipse, forgetting that this is Terraria. @glacial totem died.

#

@undone notch tried to shoot @livid shuttle using Rocket IVs as ammo, but missed every single shot. @steel sentinel's newly built house is now a pile of rubble.

#

@jolly swift teamed up with a Possessed Armor on a quest to find the Philosopher's Stone.

#

@raw moss ate some Cheetos and warded off enemies with their cheesy fingers.

#

@waxen marlin attended a Star Wars convention, and was booted out because they wouldn't stop telling people to "live long and prosper".

#

@tranquil wyvern found a cool plush doll that looked just like the Clothier. @tranquil wyvern pinned the doll to the wall, but the Clothier started screaming in pain, and no one knew why.

#

@carmine cairn heard several Whoopie Cushions, but couldn't locate the source.

#

@undone notch was shot in the heart by an arrow, but instead of falling over dead, they fell in love with a nearby Werewolf, which basically amounts to the same thing. @undone notch died.

#

@waxen marlin dressed up as a Traveling Merchant. Sadly, they were killed by someone who wanted their hat. @waxen marlin died.

#

@mossy jolt was sick of all the fighters just memeing around and readied their flamethrower with malicious intent.

#

@livid shuttle and @carmine cairn were turned into stone statues by Medusa. Don't worry, they got better eventually.

#

The sun burnt @strong sierra into a crisp. They somehow didn't die, but now they have to live out the rest of their life as a crisp.

#

@raw moss started developing a new video game. It's a 2D sandbox adventure game with retro-style graphics, and it shows a lot of promise.

#

@steel sentinel grabbed their Web Slinger and leapt from building to building, delivering pizza.

#

@livid shuttle accepted the fact that they had no free will, and that their actions were completely controlled by the Epic Battle Dryad Bot. Okay, @livid shuttle, go jump off that cliff. @livid shuttle died.

#

@strong sierra hid an actuator in @mossy jolt's lunch. Later that day, @mossy jolt stepped on a pressure plate and popped out of existence. @mossy jolt died.

#

@strong sierra saw a stick of dynamite on the ground and naively tried to pick it up. @strong sierra died.

#

@jolly swift got so drunk that they couldn't find their way home, and had to build another home just so they could say that they got home drunk.

#

@carmine cairn went on a slime killing spree, but realized too late that it was Halloween, and all the "slimes" were bunnies in disguise.

#

The Angler accidentally inhaled some of @tranquil wyvern's Vile Powder! However, nothing appears to have changed.

#

@jolly swift told bee puns while wearing Bee armor and riding a Bee mount. They were then beeset by a swarm of unbeelievably beelligerent bees. @jolly swift died.

#

@tranquil wyvern jumped into a strange rectangular portal made of obsidian, and was never seen again. @tranquil wyvern died.

#

@carmine cairn discovered a red lever with a sign above it saying "DO NOT PULL". But that sign didn't stop them, because they can't read. @carmine cairn died.

#

@raw moss was stomped on by a warlock and sent to the shadow realm. @raw moss died.

#

The battle is over!

#

The Winner is @steel sentinel!

Prize Time!

1000 points go to 1st place: @steel sentinel
500 points go to 2nd place: @raw moss
250 points go to 3rd place: @carmine cairn
150 points go to 4th place: @tranquil wyvern
150 points go to 5th place: @jolly swift
150 points go to 6th place: @strong sierra
100 points go to 7th place: @mossy jolt
100 points go to 8th place: @livid shuttle
100 points go to 9th place: @waxen marlin
100 points go to 10th place: @undone notch

Thanks for Playing Everyone!

#

Registration is open!
Type bb!register to join the next battle!
The battle will start at the next 30 minute mark (e.g. 1:30, 2:30, 3:30).

jolly swift Mar 26, 2026, 5:38 PM

#

bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 26, 2026, 5:38 PM

#

@jolly swift, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

mossy jolt Mar 26, 2026, 5:41 PM

#

bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 26, 2026, 5:41 PM

#

@mossy jolt, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

strong sierra Mar 26, 2026, 5:42 PM

#

bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 26, 2026, 5:42 PM

#

@strong sierra, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

undone notch Mar 26, 2026, 5:43 PM

#

bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 26, 2026, 5:43 PM

#

@undone notch, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

slender quarry Mar 26, 2026, 5:46 PM

#

bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 26, 2026, 5:46 PM

#

@slender quarry, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

exotic saddle Mar 26, 2026, 5:49 PM

#

bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 26, 2026, 5:49 PM

#

@exotic saddle, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

tranquil wyvern Mar 26, 2026, 5:58 PM

#

bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 26, 2026, 5:58 PM

#

@tranquil wyvern, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

waxen marlin Mar 26, 2026, 5:59 PM

#

bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 26, 2026, 5:59 PM

#

@waxen marlin, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

steel sentinel Mar 26, 2026, 6:01 PM

#

bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 26, 2026, 6:01 PM

#

@steel sentinel, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

carmine cairn Mar 26, 2026, 6:25 PM

#

bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 26, 2026, 6:25 PM

#

@carmine cairn, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

#

Registration will be closing in about 30 seconds.

#

Registration is now closed!

#

Let the battle begin!

#

The fighting has begun to die down...

#

The fighting has stopped!

#

There are 10 players remaining.
@carmine cairn, @jolly swift, @slender quarry, @undone notch, @tranquil wyvern, @exotic saddle, @steel sentinel, @waxen marlin, @mossy jolt, and @strong sierra
Send me a private message to register for the final battle.
We will continue the battle in 2-4 minutes.

#

The fighting begins again!

#

@strong sierra managed to break through the fourth wall and started trying to kill the writers to ensure that they wouldn't die in a scene. Hah, as if that coulddddddddd

#

@slender quarry neglected to read the fine print on a user agreement and ended up losing their soul. @slender quarry died.

#

@undone notch's Lucky Lucky Horseshoe wasn't lucky enough. @undone notch died.

#

@exotic saddle thought they could safely walk through a spiky ball after it stopped bouncing. @exotic saddle died.

#

@waxen marlin fired their hook, but was a millisecond too late. @waxen marlin died.

#

@tranquil wyvern made some Synonym Rolls for @mossy jolt and @steel sentinel. Just like Grammar used to make!

#

@mossy jolt equipped Green Dye and hid in a tree. @carmine cairn chopped the tree down and received 36 wood, 2 acorns, and @mossy jolt's shattered corpse. @mossy jolt died.

#

@jolly swift looked at the moon with their Sextant and realized that they were all about to meet with a terrible fate.

#

@strong sierra held their breath for as long as they could. They managed to hold it for almost seventy seconds. Nice!

#

@strong sierra loves @jolly swift to the moon and back, but unfortunately there's no oxygen up there. @strong sierra died.

#

@jolly swift used a Cosmic Car Key to try to summon a UFO mount, but summoned a Martian Saucer instead. @jolly swift died.

#

@steel sentinel discovered the correct way to pronounce "gif". Apparently, it's pronounced "gif".

#

@tranquil wyvern was smited by the Epic Battle Dryad Bot after breaking the fourth wall too many times. @tranquil wyvern died.

#

@carmine cairn tried to defeat the Old One's Army, but accidentally unleashed it upon the rest of the world. Oops.

#

@steel sentinel tried to attack @carmine cairn by spamming the Rod of Discord at them, thinking it was a weapon. @steel sentinel died.

#

The battle is over!

#

The Winner is @carmine cairn!

Prize Time!

1000 points go to 1st place: @carmine cairn
500 points go to 2nd place: @steel sentinel
250 points go to 3rd place: @tranquil wyvern
150 points go to 4th place: @jolly swift
150 points go to 5th place: @strong sierra
150 points go to 6th place: @mossy jolt
100 points go to 7th place: @waxen marlin
100 points go to 8th place: @exotic saddle
100 points go to 9th place: @undone notch
100 points go to 10th place: @slender quarry

Thanks for Playing Everyone!

#

Registration is open!
Type bb!register to join the next battle!
The battle will start at the next 30 minute mark (e.g. 1:30, 2:30, 3:30).

jolly swift Mar 26, 2026, 6:37 PM

#

bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 26, 2026, 6:37 PM

#

@jolly swift, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

strong sierra Mar 26, 2026, 6:37 PM

#

bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 26, 2026, 6:37 PM

#

@strong sierra, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

undone notch Mar 26, 2026, 6:38 PM

#

bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 26, 2026, 6:38 PM

#

@undone notch, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

exotic saddle Mar 26, 2026, 6:43 PM

#

bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 26, 2026, 6:43 PM

#

@exotic saddle, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

slender quarry Mar 26, 2026, 6:48 PM

#

bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 26, 2026, 6:48 PM

#

@slender quarry, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

muted fern Mar 26, 2026, 6:55 PM

#

bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 26, 2026, 6:55 PM

#

@muted fern, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

tranquil wyvern Mar 26, 2026, 6:58 PM

#

bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 26, 2026, 6:58 PM

#

@tranquil wyvern, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

steel sentinel Mar 26, 2026, 7:04 PM

#

bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 26, 2026, 7:05 PM

#

@steel sentinel, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

carmine cairn Mar 26, 2026, 7:05 PM

#

bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 26, 2026, 7:05 PM

#

@carmine cairn, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

proper wedge Mar 26, 2026, 7:10 PM

#

bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 26, 2026, 7:10 PM

#

@proper wedge, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

steel sentinel Mar 26, 2026, 7:18 PM

#

bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 26, 2026, 7:18 PM

#

@steel sentinel, you are already registered for the upcoming battle.

pale plaza Mar 26, 2026, 7:20 PM

#

bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 26, 2026, 7:20 PM

#

@pale plaza, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

mossy jolt Mar 26, 2026, 7:20 PM

#

bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 26, 2026, 7:20 PM

#

@mossy jolt, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

#

Registration will be closing in about 30 seconds.

#

Registration is now closed!

#

Let the battle begin!

#

The fighting has begun to die down...

#

The fighting has stopped!

#

There are 12 players remaining.
@muted fern, @carmine cairn, @jolly swift, @undone notch, @slender quarry, @pale plaza, @proper wedge, @tranquil wyvern, @exotic saddle, @steel sentinel, @mossy jolt, and @strong sierra
Send me a private message to register for the final battle.
We will continue the battle in 2-4 minutes.

#

The fighting begins again!

#

@carmine cairn was mining in the jungle and came across a Lihzahrd Temple, but the door was locked. They considered glitching their way inside, but didn't want to get arrested.

#

@muted fern fired their Wasp Gun, but it was pointed the wrong way, and they ended up swallowing a bunch of Wasps. @muted fern died.

#

@pale plaza dyed themselves yellow and buried themselves in the sand, but not before applying plenty of sunscreen first.

#

@tranquil wyvern started building a snowman, but it was blown up by a random missile that came from out of nowhere.

#

@slender quarry crafted the Grand Design and started stealing all the wiring they could find.

#

@jolly swift tried to run away from a Sand Elemental, but the wind was so strong that all they could do was run in place. @jolly swift died.

#

@proper wedge started checking for hidden cameras. They found one, and another, and another, another. Panic set into @proper wedge - were they living in a dystopian reality where they were always being watched? @proper wedge then checked the date, and their worst fears were confirmed. The year was 1984.

#

@steel sentinel flew around with a Gravitation Potion, but was so used to the old mechanics that they threw up all over @undone notch when the world was flipped.

#

@strong sierra tried boiling a pot of water to make it safe to drink, but accidentally burned it.

#

@pale plaza let a lobster crawl on them, but quickly pushed it off after remembering that lobsters taste with their feet.

#

@carmine cairn wished the scenes would go by a bit faster.

#

@undone notch started remorselessly killing bunnies, but started to feel their sins crawling on their back.

#

@exotic saddle had @undone notch lie down in a box, and then sawed the box in half. Unfortunately for @undone notch, this wasn't a magic show. @undone notch died.

#

@tranquil wyvern and @strong sierra had a petty dispute, in which they stole each other's cake and planted thorny bushes in front of each other's houses.

#

@proper wedge trapped @slender quarry in a Portal Gun loop between the roof and the floor. It was harmless, but very annoying.

#

@mossy jolt performed an interpretive dance for @exotic saddle and @steel sentinel as a way to gain their trust and friendship.

#

@slender quarry was pleasantly surprised to find a potato in Terraria, buried in the ground. However, upon noticing a blinking red light sticking out of it, they realized it was definitely not from Terraria. @slender quarry died.

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The Solar Pillar dropped a fireball on @pale plaza's noggin right as they finally killed the 100th Solar Pillar enemy. @pale plaza died.

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@proper wedge asked if there was anyone who could give them free stuff. @carmine cairn, who was using Lava Waders to stand on top of a pool of lava, told @proper wedge to teleport to their location using a Wormhole Potion. @proper wedge died.

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@tranquil wyvern pulled out their Bee Keeper and started madly swinging it at ghosts. It didn't have any effect, so @tranquil wyvern pulled out a vacuum instead.

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@strong sierra tried to feed an anaconda with hot dog buns, but it wanted none.

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Pirates are approaching from the west! @exotic saddle wondered why they never came from the north, though.

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@exotic saddle was screwed over by the mobile version controls while trying to jump over a chasm. @exotic saddle died.

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@steel sentinel broke the laws of physics and teleported using Google Maps.

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@carmine cairn tried to summon the Golem, but all they had were some cheap triple A batteries.

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@tranquil wyvern sacrificed @mossy jolt by throwing them off a cliff, and received a yellow stone in return. @mossy jolt died.

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@steel sentinel spiced up @strong sierra's soup with a Red Potion, sending them on a one-way trip to Flavortown. @strong sierra died.

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A Clown tossed a Happy Bomb right behind @tranquil wyvern. They should have been alerted by the sound of the hissing fuse, but they were wearing AirPods and couldn't hear it. @tranquil wyvern died.

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@steel sentinel used a Slimy Saddle to bounce on the Eye of Cthulhu over and over, and eventually reached space. Unfortunately, @steel sentinel didn't have a plan for safely getting back down. @steel sentinel died.

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The battle is over!

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The Winner is @carmine cairn!

Prize Time!

1000 points go to 1st place: @carmine cairn
500 points go to 2nd place: @steel sentinel
250 points go to 3rd place: @tranquil wyvern
150 points go to 4th place: @strong sierra
150 points go to 5th place: @mossy jolt
150 points go to 6th place: @exotic saddle
100 points go to 7th place: @proper wedge
100 points go to 8th place: @pale plaza
100 points go to 9th place: @slender quarry
100 points go to 10th place: @undone notch

Thanks for Playing Everyone!

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Registration is open!
Type bb!register to join the next battle!
The battle will start at the next 30 minute mark (e.g. 1:30, 2:30, 3:30).

strong sierra Mar 26, 2026, 7:38 PM

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bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 26, 2026, 7:38 PM

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@strong sierra, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

slender quarry Mar 26, 2026, 7:43 PM

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bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 26, 2026, 7:43 PM

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@slender quarry, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

raw moss Mar 26, 2026, 7:43 PM

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bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 26, 2026, 7:43 PM

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@raw moss, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

muted fern Mar 26, 2026, 7:50 PM

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bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 26, 2026, 7:50 PM

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@muted fern, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

soft lark Mar 26, 2026, 7:52 PM

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bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 26, 2026, 7:52 PM

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@soft lark, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

tranquil wyvern Mar 26, 2026, 7:53 PM

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bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 26, 2026, 7:53 PM

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@tranquil wyvern, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

pale plaza Mar 26, 2026, 7:54 PM

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bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 26, 2026, 7:54 PM

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@pale plaza, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

brave shore Mar 26, 2026, 7:59 PM

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bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 26, 2026, 7:59 PM

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@brave shore, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

proper wedge Mar 26, 2026, 8:10 PM

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bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 26, 2026, 8:10 PM

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@proper wedge, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

steel sentinel Mar 26, 2026, 8:16 PM

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bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 26, 2026, 8:16 PM

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@steel sentinel, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

steel sentinel Mar 26, 2026, 8:18 PM

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bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 26, 2026, 8:18 PM

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@steel sentinel, you are already registered for the upcoming battle.

waxen marlin Mar 26, 2026, 8:19 PM

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bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 26, 2026, 8:19 PM

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@waxen marlin, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

coarse light Mar 26, 2026, 8:25 PM

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bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 26, 2026, 8:25 PM

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@coarse light, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

carmine cairn Mar 26, 2026, 8:28 PM

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bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 26, 2026, 8:29 PM

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@carmine cairn, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

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Registration will be closing in about 30 seconds.

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Registration is now closed!

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Let the battle begin!

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The fighting has begun to die down...

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The fighting has stopped!

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There are 13 players remaining.
@carmine cairn, @muted fern, @slender quarry, @pale plaza, @raw moss, @soft lark, @proper wedge, @tranquil wyvern, @steel sentinel, @waxen marlin, @brave shore, @strong sierra, and @coarse light
Send me a private message to register for the final battle.
We will continue the battle in 2-4 minutes.

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The fighting begins again!

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@steel sentinel got lost in the desert, but found a genie who offered them a single wish. @steel sentinel wished for unlimited wealth. The genie magically deposited 9999 Platinum Coins into their Piggy Bank, smiled, and disappeared. @steel sentinel was overjoyed for a moment, but then remembered that they were still lost.

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While sitting on a bench together with @strong sierra, @brave shore leaned away and farted.

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@muted fern went noodling for catfish, but only found piranhas. @muted fern died.

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@tranquil wyvern lost their wallet. About a minute later, the Traveling Merchant arrived, offering a Companion Cube for sale.

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@slender quarry passed by a restaurant, and heard the screams of vegetables being grated and steamed with no mercy.

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@slender quarry was impaled by the Arms Dealer's nose after he told them about his amazing date with the Nurse. @slender quarry died.

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Roses are red, violets are blue. Martians are mean, @soft lark is now goo. @soft lark died.

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@coarse light ate five dozen eggs and became roughly the size of a barge.

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@raw moss recalled their middle school days, and was overwhelmed with pain.

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@carmine cairn wondered why everyone's birthday was this year... Is it some kind of cosmic coincidence?

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@carmine cairn appeared to be taking a group picture of @proper wedge, @pale plaza, and @brave shore. @carmine cairn's selfie turned out great!

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@waxen marlin was lasered to death by a psychic carrot. @waxen marlin died.

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@coarse light decided that they were spending too much time indoors, so they went outside to touch grass. The grass that they touched turned out to be a Snatcher. @coarse light died.

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@pale plaza got their first pair of wings! Which were also their last pair after they crashed into a brick wall. @pale plaza died.

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@strong sierra fired their bow at @steel sentinel, but a bird flew in the way. They tried again, but this time a bunny jumped in the way. They tried one last time, but the Moon Lord got in the way. @strong sierra gave up.

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@brave shore found out the secrets of life, the universe, and everything. They were disappointed.

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@raw moss headed off to pick some Daybloom for their potions, but @tranquil wyvern had already harvested them all and didn't replant any. How rude...

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@carmine cairn found an ugly pink fish-shaped abomination with freakishly large lips. They tried to purge it with a flamethrower, but it was not very effective.

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@strong sierra tried to swing an epic flail, but their arms were too frail and they epically failed. @strong sierra died.

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@brave shore used the Fandom website instead of wiki.gg, and wasted several hours looking for a weapon that didn't exist.

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@proper wedge gazed with wonderment at a meteor as it fell closer and closer. Wait, that's too close! @proper wedge died.

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@steel sentinel told @tranquil wyvern to step off their carpet, which they did. @steel sentinel proceeded to murder @tranquil wyvern, now that their carpet was safe from blood stains. @tranquil wyvern died.

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@steel sentinel beat @raw moss into a pulp with a stale baguette. @raw moss died.

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@brave shore recieved some BBQ Ribs from the Dungeon and wondered if they were made out of beef or pork.

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@carmine cairn felt an evil presence watching them, and prepared for trouble. Meanwhile, @brave shore took out a Mechanical Eye, intending to make it double.

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@steel sentinel was playing in a rye field and almost fell off a cliff, but luckily @carmine cairn caught them in time.

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@brave shore started feeling as if they were a celestial creature. It turns out they were just sick.

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@brave shore found an island populated entirely by bunnies, and decided that they never wanted to leave.

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@carmine cairn was about to eat some banana chips, but changed their mind after noticing that they smelled like sweaty feet.

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@steel sentinel threw several cans of blue paint into lava to make it look like water, hoping that @brave shore would fall into their trap. It worked, somehow. @brave shore died.