Untitled sound design project. Need ideas and suggestions

[crude sphinx]

Tips on the mixing and sound design? Also, as this is the very early stages of a new project, I need ideas or suggestions for staging.

[crude sphinx]

Little update

[iron bane]

I love this song! Gives me Fox Stevenson vibes in the first half and early Flash game trance/EDM vibes in the second half.
You could probably make some space for some base in the first half, I think. I'm just mostly commenting because I love the song

[crude sphinx]

Thanks!

[stoic inlet]

some sub bass at the start would definitely make the start sound less empty

[crude sphinx]

haven't the bass thing yet, but I tried a DnB pattern for the second half. My ears are kinda shot rn, so I'll be coming back to this later.

[iron bane]

Yo that's really cool! Are those lyrics? They really add some flavor to the second half. What do they say?

[crude sphinx]

Thanks! They are a set of homemade and primarily syllabic vocals. They don't mean much unfortunately, I just wanted as many contrasting syllables as possible lol. "hey! It's been a long day. Wishing you were here right now so we could spend a little bit of time."

Made some more edits

[river cradle]

Some suggestions:
I think the hi-hats, frequency wise, can sound a little "fatter" (I don't really know the best term for it).
They dominate such a high and narrow band of frequency that they almost sound like a mini triangle.

The hi-hat pattern is good, I'd add a touch of humanization by alternating their velocities; this can actually change how it sounds altogether.
You can also make the hi-hats have alternating panning - though I personally think your track is fine without it.

I really like the jungle break, the lyrics are also a chefs kiss.

At 01:38, I'm thinking you can add some sort of "call-response" trope.
In essence, you can make a melody occupy one side of the audio, then have a response melody occupy the other side.
They don't have to be different, so don't take it literally.

For example:

At 01:39 there's a melody that's repeated twice before the vocals.

I'm thinking that for both, the first half is slightly panned to the right (call), then have the second half slightly panned to the left (response).

For the vocals, you can do the same thing:

Right: "Hey! It's been a long day"
Left: "Wishing you were here right now so we could spend a little bit of time"

or something like that.

Imo, this effect should last until the main beat returns at 02:12. It's cool but it shouldn't be overused.

I'm curious to see (or rather listen) how this fits.

[crude sphinx]

Holy wow thanks for all the feedback! I like the call and response idea. I'm thinking for the call and response, I introduce a C melody that can be re-introduced later on. I've got an idea for a third part using the jungle break and some hard kicks. I still have to find a reference, but I think that could help support a 3rd part.

I submitted this song for a feedback stream by a seasoned artist, so I'm gonna wait to see what they say before I make anymore changes

[river cradle]

Good idea

[river cradle]

Who's the artist?

[viscid fog]

@crude sphinx sorry about that. i forgot to fix the spam filter catching twitch links for some reason

[crude sphinx]

That's good lol thanks

Am I able to post it now?

[viscid fog]

no, i can't crack open the bot rn

do the user /

[crude sphinx]

It's all good

[crude sphinx]

FWLRofficial on twitch

[crude sphinx]

Not sure eig you were there for the steam, but I was told to introduce the vocals earlier in the song. Which I kinda agree with. Someone said to try saturating them and bringing up the volume which I think will do.

Little self conscious of course because they are mine which is probably why I mixed them the way I did.

[river cradle]

I didn't catch the part where he reviewed your track. Though I understand his suggestion.

Vocals carry a lot of weight in music. In the context of your track, introducing vocals halfway through your track can be jarring to some listeners. Because before that point, it just sounds like an instrumental; but adding vocals there makes your track sound like it has a 1 minute and 50 second intro.

Being self conscious about using your own voice is too relatable. In your case, the issues pointed out are actually quite minuscule compared to ones that can be a bit soul crushing such as "it's off key/tune" or "Not to be rude or anything, it just sounds awful".

[crude sphinx]

Guess that's true. I think I got the confidence I need to do a bit more with them. I'll work on it tomorrow and fill you in on the progress

[worldly cloud]

ngl i was thinking it was gonna go all "dayvan cowboy" but it went much faster despite the time

still good

[stoic inlet]

it kinda reminds me of this https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=j8GPxrnUn0E&t . it is really good though, good job.

[crude sphinx]

The song is nearing completion. Im gonna add transition effects and fills and shit so dont worry about that. Any last minute requests before I start a master though?

[surreal stream]

c r i s p y hit hats damn i like this a lot

and everything