#Only 33% of viewers remain after 12 seconds

3 messages · Page 1 of 1 (latest)

queen bluff
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Just made my 2nd video on my new channel and I put a lot of work into the editing of both audio and visual elements and tried to be consice in the intro giving a short story in the beginning relating to the topic of the video before getting into the first game in the ranking about 20 seconds in. I don't know what causes this huge dropoff in just a handful of seconds. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7JLCbw-DWGA&t=41s

#mariorpg #papermario #marioandluigi
I first got introduced to Mario RPGs back in the 2000s with Mario & Luigi: Superstar Saga and since then I have played every game from Super Mario RPG, the entire Paper Mario series, the rest of the Mario & Luigi games, Mario + Rabbids and even Puzzles and Dragons: Mario Edition.

With the Nintendo Switch 2...

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torpid snow
# queen bluff Just made my 2nd video on my new channel and I put a lot of work into the editin...

Some quick feedback for you @queen bluff - I like the style of video you're going for and can tell you've put a lot of work into it, but I think your hook needs work.

The story you tell is fine, but it's not particularly exciting or funny. This isn't to say that the first five / ten seconds of your video has to be wild or anything, but there's gotta be something that grabs people or gives them a compelling reason to stay.

Here's your current script:

*"Back in 2007, when I was just four years old, I got a cartridge to use on my DS that was a little bit different. It wasn't the typical DS card, but instead was a GBA pack. I didn't know it at the time, but I was about to experience my first RPG ..." *

Some potential problems: the audience doesn't really know who you are (yet), they don't know what the games mean to you, why they're special, why they should care, etc.

Imagine the same opening, just twenty percent spicier / more raw:

"The Mario RPG series changed my freakin' life. I'm not exaggerating—I've been playing these games since I was four. They taught me how to read. Now let's rank em' and see which ones stand the test of time ..."

(You can obviously adjust to suit your speaking voice / style, but the point is to give people something to connect with right away—tell them what the series means to you, why it's special, and why they should stick around, etc.)

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As always, these are just my personal thoughts and others may feel differently. I hope this feedback gave you some food for thought. Keep up the great work! 🫡