Am I gay or straight?

[normal barn]

I need help in figuring out my sexuality. The thing is that I can see myself fulfilling all the requirements in a romantic relationship with a man, but on the other hand I feel like I can develop a stronger emotional bond with another woman. What is this supposed to mean? Please help!

[vernal carbon]

you might be bisexual 🩷💜💙 join the club girly

[covert zephyr]

Usually experimenting is the way to go, that's what other ppl have advised me to do. Other good pieces of advice (imo) are that sexuality/gender aren't as rigid as they seem, you can change your labels though time or not use labels at all. Make the labels fit you, not the other way around.

Also you could be bisexual with a preference, that stuff happens too.

[vernal carbon]

i second this, i didn't really know i was bisexual until i had my first boyfriend after having a girlfriend. definitely should try it out

[covert zephyr]

True, literally trying relationships sounds like a big test. I haven't figured my labels yet.

[normal barn]

I don't feel like I am bisexual. It just doesn't sit right with me.

[covert zephyr]

Sometimes i feel like i fall a lot into making myself fit the labels that's why i get stressed out about figuring out my sexuality. Maybe just don't worry about it a lot?

[vernal carbon]

i can actually speak from experience with this too. i'm about 60:40 guys to girls in my preferences

[covert zephyr]

Try being lesbian/straight for a while, maybe that clears up things

[vernal carbon]

just take your time, like i said it doesn't hurt to experiment. maybe start out with a one-off date with another woman or something along those lines just to see how you enjoy it.
it's entirely normal to feel uncomfortable knowing you might side with a certain sexuality.

[covert zephyr]

Sometimes i feel like i don't wanna be straight just because being part of a queer community feels special. The bias is very real.

[vernal carbon]

but aren't you gay? it says so in your roles

[normal barn]

Fortunately I am already part of the queer community because I am a trans woman

[covert zephyr]

i have gay and pan there, i'm still questioning but i feel like i'm between those two

[vernal carbon]

ohhh my thumb was in the way of the pan 🫠 alr

[covert zephyr]

being trans is cool, i've experimented being trans too and tbh it made me feel more comfortable even tho i just came back to cis

[covert zephyr]

LMAO

[normal barn]

A day ago I hanged out alone with another woman that I was thinking of dating, and it wasn't all that great of an experience

[vernal carbon]

this is the way i hold my thumbs on my phone lol (the black circles)

[normal barn]

It was a quasi-date

[vernal carbon]

might have just not been the right type of person. if you're up to it, i would say try again with someone more like yourself

[normal barn]

She knew that I was interested in her btw. We are simply friends at this point.

[covert zephyr]

you can write with two thumbs?? how does that mental gymnastics work?

[normal barn]

She was just not interested in dating atm

[covert zephyr]

i mean... it was an specific person so it could be about the person more than your sexuality

[covert zephyr]

ah yeah agree

[vernal carbon]

pretty simple actually, i average around 90 wpm with just these two fingers
i've always typed like this since i got a phone so ive just been conditioned

[covert zephyr]

i hold my phone like this (ignore my non-existing art skills) so the thumb's never in the way

[normal barn]

@covert zephyr @vernal carbon Is it a sign that I might be gay if every single time I see a woman I find them beautiful?

[normal barn]

That is how I hold my phone too

[vernal carbon]

do you also find men attractive? you could be bi with a female preference

[vernal carbon]

i only type with one hand if the other is occupied for whatever reason but when i do i use swipe texting

also that's better than what i would've made lol

[covert zephyr]

tbh... idk, if i were you i would experiment more, i would call myself a lesbian sometimes and same with bi until something feels right

whatever you end up feeling more comfortable with isn't bad, you don't have to commit to anything

literally it's about you so have fun

[normal barn]

Honestly, those thoughts never really pop up in my head, and if they ever did it was just for fictional men. Men irl never really make me think about how attractive they are.

[covert zephyr]

can i send you a friend request?

[vernal carbon]

ofc

[covert zephyr]

tbh

im in the same place but genders inverted ofc

my advice, don't worry about it as much

from what you describe you sound like 90% gay to me

[normal barn]

Where is the 10% coming from?

[covert zephyr]

benefit of the doubt honestly

i don't feel confident to tell you you're either

[normal barn]

Ah okay

[covert zephyr]

i think that's all the advice i can give you, that's the advice i try to follow

just experiment, be different things and see how that makes you feel

[normal barn]

Alright

[median radish]

maybe berrisexual may be the label you’re looking for?

[normal barn]

@vernal carbon @covert zephyr Hey, I wish to let you know that I was able to figure out my sexuality after all. I was able to determine that I am most likely straight after some reflection. Thank you for helping me figure this all out. I appreciate it.

[vernal carbon]

congrats, i'm happy for you! glad we could help :)