civic obsidian
Trigger warning for a nice helping of internalized bigotry (homophobia, ableism, body shaming), suicidal ideation, mental garbage that’s hard to describe but is basically schizophrenia “lite” edition.
I hate myself I do nothing but procrastinate and waste time. I have a mountain of missing schoolwork to do, and I won’t do it. I constantly threaten self-harm or imply it if something doesn’t go my way. Any form of empathy I have is cancelled out by just how fast I can flip a switch and crack out slurs for people. I am practically a psychopath and given the number of voices in my head I wouldn’t be surprised if I was. And then I constantly force myself to problems onto others by harassing moderation teams of other servers. Just earlier today I cracked a pair of particularly dark jokes about tackle football, babies, and a 50 cal. I am a fat worthless fuck who does nothing but bitch and moan. I refuse to eat healthy. I am an autistic waste of space who does nothing helpful and just stresses my mid forties parents. I am a complete waste. I I had a gun loaded with one bullet and all my personalities in a room I’d shoot the asshole who does nothing but tell me to kill my self every day. I am stupid and immature.
analog heart