Rhapsodious Storm

[odd totem]

Whene'er there's a problem you can't find,
Communicate thy heart and harken my bind.
No matter if you shall envision as blind,
I'll forever regard thy name, thy kind.

Even if you given thy graceful box of gold,
To a laddie that worry about thy soften mold.
Dinnae talk, I'll accolade thy road you've told,
And forever praise thy goodwilled fold.

Despite e'erything that is happening now,
E'eryone sings "Tibok", "Blue", "Take a Bow".
The Abra river is soaking in bloods by plow,
I wish I'd talk though thy meekly vow.

However, no single thought is spoken,
E'ery thought that is given is written.
Frightly afraid for boxes of gold to listen,
The tongue to express had been taken.

I do question thy mind, liefly bonnie,
If thy box of gold has a thought to free.
Well, who am I kidding to be a sweety,
Thy box of gold is not mine to be.

[vestal star]

this poem is very interesting, i find the old-timey, faux-Shakespearean language fun, The mix of “thy” and “laddie” and “liefly bonnie” gives it this kinda romantic, archaic tone, which can be charming, but sometimes it feels a bit clunky at times. What i get from it, is that you’re trying to talk about unspoken feelings, missed chances, and maybe jealousy or regret over someone giving their affection to someone else, but it gets buried. By clunky i mean lines like “Frightly afraid for boxes of gold to listen”. The emotion is there though