Grief. | The Art of Poetry | Page 1

winter hemlock Jun 30, 2023, 1:09 AM

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Grieving isn’t easy.
Not when I’m grieving the pieces of me.
Pieces of my skull, splintered. Shattered.
Pieces of my heart, cracked. Tattered.
Pieces of my memories that I simply cannot remember,
Pieces of my skin that crawl with bugs from the embers.
Pieces of my hair that I despise yet lovingly recognize,
Pieces of my mind that I criticize, only to sympathize.

I’ve been told grief doesn’t shrink, the space around it grows,
And I’m waiting for such growth to happen as I slowly decompose.
I will not let her leave without being commemorated,
for her grave within myself will never be left undecorated.

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ruby brook Jun 30, 2023, 1:15 AM

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It's beautiful

livid carbon Jun 30, 2023, 1:37 AM

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i love the rhyme scheme and the flow of this poem, its amazing

formal stirrup Jun 30, 2023, 1:38 AM

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I really love the cadence of the beginning of this poem! It is so cool, and I read it almost as a drum beat or something. I also really love your use of consonance and assonance throughout the poem. It creates a very nice ring in the mind.

If you want to improve, one way I would suggest doing so is by showing instead of telling. Showing is often very metaphor heavy, whereas telling is when you’re describing what is literally visible/felt/sensed. I often find metaphors by looking at something, or scrutinizing it’s feeling, and trying to think of other things that look or feel similar. Happy writing!
:)

formal stirrup Jun 30, 2023, 8:21 AM

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It's a beautiful poem

#Grief.