Oh! - How I embraced my beating heart
My shattered-glass psyche persists
I present to thee a bloody token
Bloody token drenched in fire
And let thy emotional flame expand
In the crimson sky, a sign of faith, which unravels
Release me from this mortal coil
And forever I shall sleep
Should I sleep in autumn ashes
#Red Grave Soil
bright wedge
lean cobalt
I like your poem, but I think you should keep some things in mind:
- "Thou" corresponds with "you" in the nominative case.
-"Thee," which you used properly, corresponds with "you" in the objective case.
-"Thy" goes before consonant sounds.
-"Thine" goes before vowel sounds. I noticed that you used "thy" in the fifth line, rather than "thine."