little lantern
Hi, friends. First, thank you for building such a beautiful and addictive game. I’ve enjoyed it enough to have given you hundreds of dollars, with no regrets.
However, I think I’m going to stop playing now, and I like you enough to explain why: the English translations are odd throughout the game, but by the time we get to Teneebria, they are sometimes so bad that they make no sense. The text is about equal to what an average 11-year-old American child might write as a first draft.
In addition, by that point we are only referred to using male words, like he, him, lord, sir, etc. I am female. My character is female. So I personally find this long and consistent series of gender mistakes unpleasant.
If I may suggest, you need to hire two experienced professional writers who are native English speakers, who are also skilled in localization: one who speaks American English and the other UK English, one to rewrite all the text to be clean and the other to edit their work. My guess would be that this will take two full-time months for the writer and one month for the editor, or much longer if you require a screenshot showing the current text for every correction.
I could do the American role (not for free), or I’d be happy to help you screen other people if you want to find someone whose American English is strong. I have almost 30 years of experience in writing, editing, localization, and software QA. I want to help somehow, but the text is far too broken to post every example in this forum.
On the positive side, I have found only one bug that wasn’t text-related, and I’m not sure even that one is a real bug. It could be a poorly-worded explanation.
This is a great game. It could be a masterpiece. To see it failing on something so easily fixed as the text, when the gameplay is so strong, makes me sad. I hope you’re able to fix it quickly enough to keep most people engaged.
All the best of luck.
small bone
forest light