#emi's safe space

1 messages · Page 2 of 1

split veldt Jul 27, 2025, 3:33 PM

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And the only fucking dress that could help is no where to be found

unkempt ravine Jul 27, 2025, 3:34 PM

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maybe you could get some arm warmers to cover them with

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?

split veldt Jul 27, 2025, 3:34 PM

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My family wouldn't let me

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They'd either call me weird or cringe

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Or that I should be ashamed of myself looking like that

unkempt ravine Jul 27, 2025, 3:35 PM

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and you would let that stop you?

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like arm warmers would be really good if you want to cover anything you're insecure about

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on your arms

split veldt Jul 27, 2025, 3:35 PM

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I don't want to feel weird the whole time tho

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And

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I'm pretty sure mom threw them away

unkempt ravine Jul 27, 2025, 3:36 PM

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oh i didnt know you already had a pair

unkempt ravine Jul 27, 2025, 3:36 PM

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split veldt I don't want to feel weird the whole time tho

but still why would you feel weird

split veldt Jul 27, 2025, 3:36 PM

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More like embarrassed

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From the way they'd look at me

unkempt ravine Jul 27, 2025, 3:37 PM

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wouldn't you feel more mebarrassed if you didn't having anything covering them though?

split veldt Jul 27, 2025, 3:37 PM

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I'm trying to find something to cover it tho

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And it's different here

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My family would mention it for ages

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Not to mention my cousins are here

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I'd be digging my own grave

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And like I said

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My mom probably threw them away bc they're no where to be found

unkempt ravine Jul 27, 2025, 3:44 PM

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bless

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but still i think you'd be happier with them

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don't worry about what your family says as much

split veldt Jul 27, 2025, 3:55 PM

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I hate this so much

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I found so many things to cover up

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Yet I look like a fucking cow

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I hate myself

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God how I wish I was dead right now

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Everyone is going to mention how fat I look

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Because I do

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I hate this so fucking bad

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I wish I was dead

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I don't want this

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I don't want to be here

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I hate myself

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I hate how I look

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Why can't I just be beautiful like everyone else

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Or normal

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Or happy

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Or at least fucking dead

split veldt Jul 27, 2025, 6:19 PM

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I found the dress..

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It's still visible

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Mom keeps telling me to wear it anyway because no one would even think it's ||self harm||

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But I don't believe that

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I put bandages over them I still look like shit

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I haven't told mom yet but fuck no I'm not wearing that

split veldt Jul 28, 2025, 3:37 PM

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My bday was nice so far

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I wore a white t-shirt and shorts

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It wasn't so bad

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Until mom started saying I'm not speaking right

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(I said thank you)

unkempt ravine Jul 28, 2025, 3:39 PM

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split veldt (I said thank you)

bless SOB SOB

split veldt Jul 28, 2025, 3:39 PM

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Then she started comparing me to my cousin

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She kept saying "oh you've lost weight! Unlike her"

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(ab me)

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I'm gonna pretend it didn't bother me

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Although

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I kind of didn't eat all day

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Lol no one notices

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That's my power ig

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It's still 5 tho

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I might have to eat when dad comes

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My friend came over but she had to leave pretty quickly

split veldt Jul 28, 2025, 3:41 PM

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split veldt I might have to eat when dad comes

I'll probably ||throw up|| tho ngl

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I liked most of tdy

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Ig

unkempt ravine Jul 28, 2025, 3:42 PM

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split veldt My friend came over but she had to leave pretty quickly

at least she still came over teto_heart

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also maybe just try not too eat too much at once

split veldt Jul 28, 2025, 3:43 PM

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I'll try not to at all ngl

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I wanna cry so bad

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I just might

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I'll just touch up my makeup later

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No one would notice anyway

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It's more like it's my cousins bday

unkempt ravine Jul 28, 2025, 3:47 PM

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sadness

split veldt Jul 28, 2025, 3:50 PM

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I feel invisible..

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The only person who's been close tdy was my brother

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I hate tdy

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Sm

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I wish I could hide forever

split veldt Jul 28, 2025, 4:12 PM

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Mom left

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She went to work although it's my bday

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She could have said no

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She didn't.

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Wish this bday never came ngl

split veldt Jul 29, 2025, 7:33 AM

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Sometimes I wonder if I'll ever make it out alive from this house

fresh oracle Jul 29, 2025, 10:49 AM

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This too!

split veldt Jul 30, 2025, 2:52 PM

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I quit this online life I faked, it's not real. I can never be this happy person I dreamed of being. Everyone here has helped a lot, but I'm not made for this. I'm sorry, goodbye.

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I do not know what might happen with my life. But I'm sorry if I do smth dumb

split veldt Jul 30, 2025, 4:22 PM

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split veldt I do not know what might happen with my life. But I'm sorry if I do smth dumb

Please. Emi I beg, you genuinely light up my life.

split veldt Jul 30, 2025, 5:28 PM

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I'm sorry

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I wasn't rlly

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Thinking straight maybe

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Idk

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I'm sorry

split veldt Jul 31, 2025, 4:17 AM

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I woke up again.

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This whole night has been like a nightmare

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I went to sleep at like 2

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Woke up at 3 something

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Almost 4

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And got very very sick

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And now.

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I slept again and woke up again

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At fucking 6

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I've been getting 1-2 hs of sleep then getting up again

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Which is really messing up w my head

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And all this time I've woken up js to ||throw up||

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My throat hurts very bad

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All I ||throw up|| is acid

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Which is badly hurting my neck for now

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I hate thissss

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I'm gonna go sleep again ig

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But I hope I don't randomly wake up and ||puke|| again

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And I kept having this nightmare every time

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Just with different details, same theme

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The theme was me getting ||buried alive|| 😭

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Fml

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Oh I forgot to sponsor that mb

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I'ma go now ig

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My bf isn't awake so I'd be bored if I stayed up

unkempt ravine Jul 31, 2025, 8:34 AM

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split veldt And all this time I've woken up js to ||throw up||

bless

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can you not get any medications to help with it?

split veldt Jul 31, 2025, 11:28 AM

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unkempt ravine can you not get any medications to help with it?

My mom is one of those mom's who never gives medicine without prescription

unkempt ravine Jul 31, 2025, 11:42 AM

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sadness

split veldt Jul 31, 2025, 1:14 PM

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I do feel better now

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Not emotionally tho

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Discord is a seriously big secret I'm keeping from my family

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And it feels so wrong

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I wish I could quit but I've gotten so attached to a person

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I don't want to leave him but I don't want this secret either

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I feel like a terrible person

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No matter how bad they get sometimes

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They're still my family

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And I feel so bad about my brother

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He's always been a shoulder I could lean on

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But this feels wrong..

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Very very wrong

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I keep overthinking this

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And it's taking a toll on me

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I'm the type of person to run from my problems

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But this time there's no where to run

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I can't help but feel like I'm lying to myself

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Like what I have online will never get irl

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I feel extremely guilty

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Like seriously bad

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I honestly started discord js for friends

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I never expected to become smth more

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Getting an app on secret was one thing

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But having a secret relationship..

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It's really really bad

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I feel terrible

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I wish I didn't feel so guilty

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I don't want to leave him...

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But I don't want to live a lie either..

split veldt Jul 31, 2025, 4:49 PM

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split veldt But having a secret relationship..

Tbh emi. I’m the same way, keeping Discord away from my family and the relationship even farther.

split veldt Jul 31, 2025, 6:35 PM

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I'm leaving discord. I really hope I meet you guys again, especially you Bo. Goodbye everyone. Stay safe.

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I won't delete this account or leave this server

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We might meet again in the far future

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Goodbye

unkempt ravine Jul 31, 2025, 6:46 PM

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split veldt I'm leaving discord. I really hope I meet you guys again, especially you Bo. Goo...

i will totally miss your poems and i'm sure a lot of other people will too but nontheless i wish the best for you in the future teto_heart

summer goblet Jul 31, 2025, 6:46 PM

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split veldt I'm leaving discord. I really hope I meet you guys again, especially you Bo. Goo...

I wish you luck, from here on out we cant assist your journey any longer. I hope that you find a way out, and live a life that you've dreamed of

low tartan Jul 31, 2025, 7:18 PM

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Byebye emi

fierce bolt Jul 31, 2025, 10:37 PM

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its good that you are taking a break but dont do anything stupid while you are not on discord anymore

summer goblet Aug 1, 2025, 12:06 AM

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^

split veldt Aug 1, 2025, 10:57 PM

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I wish I was free

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I see all these people who get to do what they want

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And they don't even know how privileged they are

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I wish discord didn't have to be a secret

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Maybe then I wouldn't have to quit

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Maybe then I wouldn't have to leave so much behind while feeling like this

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I hate this

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I hate me

low tartan Aug 1, 2025, 11:22 PM

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split veldt I wish I was free

Ur back?

split veldt Aug 1, 2025, 11:24 PM

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I dunno

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I'm scared

low tartan Aug 1, 2025, 11:25 PM

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split veldt I'm scared

It's your choice whether to continue or not

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but im in a long distance relationship im hiding from my family as well

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on my 10th month with my love rn and we only got to be together irl for a few hours everyday for a month

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Weigh the positives and the negatives

split veldt Aug 1, 2025, 11:26 PM

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Well, you're a 60yo man. /jk sorry

low tartan Aug 1, 2025, 11:27 PM

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split veldt Well, you're a 60yo man. /jk sorry

Ur fine dummy

unkempt ravine Aug 1, 2025, 11:56 PM

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split veldt I see all these people who get to do what they want

it's not as easy as they make it look

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it's beyond just luck because people work hard for the things they want

split veldt Aug 1, 2025, 11:57 PM

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I get that. But most of the people Im talking about are overly privileged

unkempt ravine Aug 1, 2025, 11:57 PM

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those are the ones you shouldn't be comparing yourself to

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because everything they have that you don't is far out of your control

split veldt Aug 1, 2025, 11:58 PM

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Ig, I can't help but feel so controlled by others tho. although I do try

unkempt ravine Aug 1, 2025, 11:58 PM

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bless but that's the most important part

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as long as you're still trying one way or another you're still getting closer heh

split veldt Aug 2, 2025, 9:48 PM

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Mom is mad

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She's veryad

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I'm drink

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She's mad

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It's ktngodd

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It's very bad

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When she's mad

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Shetepls dad

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When she tells dad

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Dad is had

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And I'd dad is mad

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He driksu

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When dad drinksu

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Hensayss

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Hs says he kill us

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I do wanna die

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But I do wanna die

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Mom isad

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Mad

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I'm scafed

unkempt ravine Aug 2, 2025, 9:49 PM

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emi r u okay WAH

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what's happening twin

split veldt Aug 2, 2025, 9:49 PM

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I might be drink hit

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But

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Mom mad

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If she's mad

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Me scared

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Attack

unkempt ravine Aug 2, 2025, 9:51 PM

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you're drunk ??

split veldt Aug 2, 2025, 10:01 PM

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No I'm just

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Realistic

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I'm ecraed

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Mom thinkse.beinv drunk I semnerrasong

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If she thinks m being emberrasing

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That's nad

unkempt ravine Aug 2, 2025, 10:03 PM

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try to calm down a lil emi sadness

split veldt Aug 2, 2025, 10:03 PM

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Il actard

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Im

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She vared

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Scared

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If mom mad

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She don't speak to me

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And she rant to dad

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If she rant to dad

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Dad drink

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If dad drink

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Dad kill us

unkempt ravine Aug 2, 2025, 10:05 PM

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you're going to be fine i promise

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can you not go to sleep ??

split veldt Aug 2, 2025, 10:05 PM

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I can hut

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I need to vent

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Nc

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Bc

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If I don't vent

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Tjen

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Bo won't know I die if I die

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I want me to be me

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I wante to be me free

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But me be scared

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I'm scared

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I

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Me wish was dead

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I wanna be drad

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If me had gun

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Me wouydhoot mhseld

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Right koe

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Me would shoot museld

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Because memis nad

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Me is ekbarrsing

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Mom be mad at me when I wake up

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Me scared

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Me wan die

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Me not good enough

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Me don't deserve life

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I wish me was dead

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I want me a gun

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I want me drunk.more

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Okay

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I'm scate

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Svate

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Bc

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I say mom goodnight

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She don't respond

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No one care

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No one care me

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World move slow

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I want me move fast

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Of I had choife

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Me die

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I want die

unkempt ravine Aug 2, 2025, 10:11 PM

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bless sadness

unkempt ravine Aug 2, 2025, 10:11 PM

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split veldt I want me drunk.more

so you are??

split veldt Aug 2, 2025, 10:11 PM

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Yesh

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I'm emberrased

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I emberras me motjer

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She's d

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Mad

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I don't want mom mad

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Mom nad me cry

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Me crying

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unkempt ravine Aug 2, 2025, 10:13 PM

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please try to sleep soon emi it'll do you good sadness

split veldt Aug 2, 2025, 10:13 PM

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Noooo

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I want me sleep forever

unkempt ravine Aug 2, 2025, 10:14 PM

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you'll feel much better in the morning i promise WAH

split veldt Aug 2, 2025, 10:14 PM

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I want to die

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I want me to die

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Me emberrasing mom

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Mom mad

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I don't what mom mad

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If mom mad she speak me no

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Me bead spink

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I want pill

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Pills me die

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I wnt me die

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Because

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Mom hate me

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Everyone hate me

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I hate me

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I want die

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Please me die

unkempt ravine Aug 2, 2025, 10:16 PM

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split veldt Everyone hate me

we don't.

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have you tried to sleep yet ??

split veldt Aug 2, 2025, 10:16 PM

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I want slepo dorever

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If I sleep forever

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Mom is happy

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If I die

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Mom is happy

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Everyone is happy

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If me die

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Every one happy

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Please

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Please

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Anything

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Anyone

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Kipm me

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I want me deas

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Me don't deserve love

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Live

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Or

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Laih

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Memdeeseve feaug

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Me deserve death

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Me is weak

unkempt ravine Aug 2, 2025, 10:19 PM

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split veldt Me don't deserve love

nobody is undeserving of love emi please just get some rest WAH

split veldt Aug 2, 2025, 10:19 PM

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Me should take pill

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Me should die

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Hats what ppl say

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EMI should die

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That what ppl say

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Emi is no smart

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Wmi no smart wnoug

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Emi die

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Smi cry baby

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EMI fat

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Ppl mad

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Me cry

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I told bro mom mad

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He said he don't fa4

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He don't care ab me

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No one care me

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Me bad

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Me far

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Me not good enoug

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Me not smart enugh

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Me is smart but not me genouso

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Me bother epple

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Please

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Okay

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Li

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Pley

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Pleay

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Please

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Kil me

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Me no want live

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Me want feath

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I want death

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I want me death

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Ppl aga

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When dehnk

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You're gou

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If I'm me

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Me want me dwad

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Me want pilla

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Mom mad

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Me scared

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If mom mad she upset

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Mom mad she curse

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Mom mad she hate me

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Everyone hate ms

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I hate me

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I kill me

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I hate me

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Psase

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Please

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Kil me

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God

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Hod take me

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God please

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Please

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God bless teka me

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No bless

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Me don't deserve bless

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Me deserve death

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No one care

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No one care if me die

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If me die

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People happy

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If me have gun

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Me shoot jysles

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Me shoot museum

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Nyself

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Myself

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Because

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Boden

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Boden deserve happhbemi

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Boden deserve happh emi

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Me not happy emi

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Me dumb emi

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Me feel bad for boden

unkempt ravine Aug 2, 2025, 10:28 PM

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emi sadness

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boden is perfectly happy with you nd you dont realise that

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he feels the same way you do abt him

split veldt Aug 2, 2025, 10:29 PM

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Bi

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No

unkempt ravine Aug 2, 2025, 10:29 PM

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yes!

split veldt Aug 2, 2025, 10:29 PM

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Me

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Me not good enoug

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Me bad

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Me very mad

unkempt ravine Aug 2, 2025, 10:29 PM

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what makes you think you're not good enough?

split veldt Aug 2, 2025, 10:30 PM

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Because

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Me only happy when me not navious

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When me not have anxiety

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But.me never not have anciety

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Me only kot have anxiety when me drunk

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Me I'm drunk

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Because when me drunk me not have macrietu

unkempt ravine Aug 2, 2025, 10:31 PM

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you think you're undeserving of love just because of how you act sometimes?

split veldt Aug 2, 2025, 10:31 PM

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Yehs

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Me want die

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If me had gun

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Me shoot muself

unkempt ravine Aug 2, 2025, 10:31 PM

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split veldt Yehs

love isn't always about loving someone for the good things

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it can be still loving someone the same way despite their flaws and imperfections

split veldt Aug 2, 2025, 10:32 PM

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But

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Mom mad me

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Mom is mad at me

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I say goodnight at mom

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Mom don't say

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Anything

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Because me di

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Disaaponimtemnt

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Because me mad

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I want me dead

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Pyo

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Oleay

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Please

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Me beg yuy

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I beg you

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Kill me

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Me don't deserve live

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Because

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Me nad

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Me not good ejoug

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Everyoone

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Say I'm bad girl

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Very bad girl

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Not good neoug

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Everyone who knows me

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Evetone hate me

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Become bad

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Because

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Because me very bad

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Me

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Me actually want death

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Me not good

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I want me dead

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Stop

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Stop me life

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Me don't deserve kice

unkempt ravine Aug 2, 2025, 10:36 PM

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split veldt Disaaponimtemnt

you're not emi i'm sure everyone's just having a hard time right now

split veldt Aug 2, 2025, 10:37 PM

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Nooo

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I told kom goodnight

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Mom glare at me

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I want me dead

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I don't want me

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Me cry

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Please

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Please kil me

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Me no more me

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Please

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I want me kill mysey

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Me sorry

unkempt ravine Aug 2, 2025, 10:38 PM

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you shouldn't be sorry for anything

split veldt Aug 2, 2025, 10:39 PM

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Me sorry because

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Because me try dead

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Me what me dead

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Because everyone want medead

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So I what me dead

unkempt ravine Aug 2, 2025, 10:39 PM

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not a single person here wants that

split veldt Aug 2, 2025, 10:40 PM

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I don't know

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Evetone hate me

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Family ahfe ms

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I hate me

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I wnT me ded

unkempt ravine Aug 2, 2025, 10:40 PM

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they don't.

split veldt Aug 2, 2025, 10:41 PM

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No

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Mom

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Mom hate

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Me

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Mom galre

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I say 👍

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Goodnight

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Mom yalre

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I say brother mom glare

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Brother say he don't fare

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Cate

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Care

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I wnG kms

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I don't want live

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People say when u drunk

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U be yourself

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Myself

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Me myself no luve

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Live

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No more

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Me want help hut

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But

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Me don't deserve help

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I hate me

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I don't want me

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Kil me

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Please

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Me no.live

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Me want sua goodbye

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Me goodnight

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Me hope no wake up

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Goodnight evetuone

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I hope me don't wake up

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Wber

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Byeee

split veldt Aug 2, 2025, 11:53 PM

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I don't sleep

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I'm a very bad person

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I'm sorry everyone

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I'm sorry tracher

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Im sorry I provoked you

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I'm sorry I exist

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I wish I could stop that but I cant

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I'm sorry

fierce bolt Aug 2, 2025, 11:55 PM

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emi whats going on?

split veldt Aug 2, 2025, 11:59 PM

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fierce bolt emi whats going on?

I'm good

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I'm very good

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I'm always good

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Haha

fierce bolt Aug 3, 2025, 12:02 AM

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then lets just talk

split veldt Aug 3, 2025, 12:03 AM

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fierce bolt then lets just talk

Wboyr what

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Oboit what

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About wjat

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What

fierce bolt Aug 3, 2025, 12:03 AM

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anything you like

split veldt Aug 3, 2025, 12:03 AM

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I don't know

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I don't like anything

fierce bolt Aug 3, 2025, 12:03 AM

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what you up to now then

split veldt Aug 3, 2025, 12:03 AM

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Except boden

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I'm laying down haha

fierce bolt Aug 3, 2025, 12:04 AM

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isnt it night for you?

split veldt Aug 3, 2025, 12:04 AM

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It's 2am

fierce bolt Aug 3, 2025, 12:04 AM

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damn

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you drank?

split veldt Aug 3, 2025, 12:05 AM

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Wone

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Wine yes

fierce bolt Aug 3, 2025, 12:05 AM

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you found some?

split veldt Aug 3, 2025, 12:05 AM

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fierce bolt you found some?

Ref

fierce bolt Aug 3, 2025, 12:06 AM

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whats that

split veldt Aug 3, 2025, 12:06 AM

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Red

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Wine

fierce bolt Aug 3, 2025, 12:06 AM

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how much you had

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you are like, really drunk

split veldt Aug 3, 2025, 12:07 AM

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I'm mot

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I took only 8

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Hlasss

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Hlaesses

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Glasses

fierce bolt Aug 3, 2025, 12:07 AM

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8 is alot

split veldt Aug 3, 2025, 12:07 AM

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I'm fine

fierce bolt Aug 3, 2025, 12:08 AM

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you not tired?

split veldt Aug 3, 2025, 12:08 AM

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Wirh what

fierce bolt Aug 3, 2025, 12:09 AM

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cause its late

split veldt Aug 3, 2025, 12:09 AM

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It's kit

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Nor

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Not

#

Sorry

fierce bolt Aug 3, 2025, 12:09 AM

#

split veldt Sorry

for what?

split veldt Aug 3, 2025, 12:09 AM

#

I'm acting weird

#

Sorry I'll stop

low tartan Aug 3, 2025, 12:10 AM

#

Emi

fierce bolt Aug 3, 2025, 12:10 AM

#

split veldt I'm acting weird

not really, i just want to talk

split veldt Aug 3, 2025, 12:10 AM

#

Hiiiiii

split veldt Aug 3, 2025, 12:10 AM

#

fierce bolt not really, i just want to talk

Wjats up

fierce bolt Aug 3, 2025, 12:10 AM

#

split veldt Wjats up

just woke up ngl

split veldt Aug 3, 2025, 12:11 AM

#

fierce bolt just woke up ngl

Thats nice

#

U oh hsould sleep morei

#

Wtf

fierce bolt Aug 3, 2025, 12:11 AM

#

i slept 9 hrs

split veldt Aug 3, 2025, 12:11 AM

#

You should sleep more

#

I should tirn my autocoreeict on

fierce bolt Aug 3, 2025, 12:12 AM

#

Lmao

#

is your vision blurry?

split veldt Aug 3, 2025, 12:13 AM

#

I cant find the setyongs tjing but wtv

#

I don't know

#

Isnblurry the thing with dots

#

Black dots

#

Is black a color

#

Peple say its a shadi

#

Sjade

#

Shade

#

Yea it's a shaded

#

Shade

#

Wyf

fierce bolt Aug 3, 2025, 12:14 AM

#

black might just be a new colour ngl

split veldt Aug 3, 2025, 12:14 AM

#

Wtf

#

Black is the.mew stuel

fierce bolt Aug 3, 2025, 12:14 AM

#

cause colours we cant perceive are black

split veldt Aug 3, 2025, 12:14 AM

#

Style

fierce bolt Aug 3, 2025, 12:14 AM

#

true

split veldt Aug 3, 2025, 12:14 AM

#

Waw hour smart

fierce bolt Aug 3, 2025, 12:14 AM

#

probably idk

#

i might just be dumb and it is black

split veldt Aug 3, 2025, 12:14 AM

#

Waw

#

Im always dumb

fierce bolt Aug 3, 2025, 12:15 AM

#

smarter than me though

split veldt Aug 3, 2025, 12:15 AM

#

Slmeouc very wise siad fhF

#

He said. I need to leatn moee

#

Yau

#

Yay

fierce bolt Aug 3, 2025, 12:15 AM

#

who said?

split veldt Aug 3, 2025, 12:15 AM

#

My old teacher

#

Amd

#

Old therapiy

#

Therapists

#

Therapist

fierce bolt Aug 3, 2025, 12:16 AM

#

meh, i prefer to just be dumb, aint no need to get smart

split veldt Aug 3, 2025, 12:17 AM

#

I dunno

#

Hn.was a very smart men

fierce bolt Aug 3, 2025, 12:17 AM

#

he wasnt a good man now was he?

split veldt Aug 3, 2025, 12:17 AM

#

Noo

#

J was

#

He was

#

I swear

#

He was

#

Berry good peeson

fierce bolt Aug 3, 2025, 12:18 AM

#

really?

#

if you say so, maybe he was

split veldt Aug 3, 2025, 12:18 AM

#

He was

#

I promishe

fierce bolt Aug 3, 2025, 12:19 AM

#

where is he now then

split veldt Aug 3, 2025, 12:19 AM

#

I dunno

#

I see him tho

#

I saw him near the his station once

low tartan Aug 3, 2025, 12:19 AM

#

reread our conversation

split veldt Aug 3, 2025, 12:19 AM

#

low tartan reread our conversation

Thatwfast

#

Rnt u on a walk

#

I rered

low tartan Aug 3, 2025, 12:22 AM

#

split veldt Rnt u on a walk

Finished

low tartan Aug 3, 2025, 12:22 AM

#

split veldt I rered

It's thinkin time

fierce bolt Aug 3, 2025, 12:22 AM

#

low tartan Finished

damn morning walk?

low tartan Aug 3, 2025, 12:22 AM

#

It's 1 AM

#

😭

split veldt Aug 3, 2025, 12:22 AM

#

low tartan It's thinkin time

Noooo

fierce bolt Aug 3, 2025, 12:22 AM

#

bruh

low tartan Aug 3, 2025, 12:23 AM

#

walk by the beach

split veldt Aug 3, 2025, 12:23 AM

#

I live beches

#

Love

#

fierce bolt Aug 3, 2025, 12:24 AM

#

same

#

ocean kinda scary though

split veldt Aug 3, 2025, 12:24 AM

#

I drosn in showeirs

fierce bolt Aug 3, 2025, 12:25 AM

#

what??

split veldt Aug 3, 2025, 12:25 AM

#

I drosn in showers

#

Droen

#

Drown

#

Sorry

fierce bolt Aug 3, 2025, 12:25 AM

#

like you bask in the water?

split veldt Aug 3, 2025, 12:26 AM

#

No

#

I jut cant bretahe so

#

Sometilumes i apss ot

#

Out

#

Wtf

fierce bolt Aug 3, 2025, 12:26 AM

#

damn

split veldt Aug 3, 2025, 12:26 AM

#

Anyway

fierce bolt Aug 3, 2025, 12:26 AM

#

you gonna have a headache tmr

split veldt Aug 3, 2025, 12:27 AM

#

Why

#

I don't

fierce bolt Aug 3, 2025, 12:27 AM

#

cause if you drink, you gonna have a hangover

split veldt Aug 3, 2025, 12:27 AM

#

I realize you mod

#

Waw

#

Hi kad

#

Mad

#

Mod

fierce bolt Aug 3, 2025, 12:27 AM

#

eh?

split veldt Aug 3, 2025, 12:28 AM

#

Sorry

low tartan Aug 3, 2025, 12:28 AM

#

😭

fierce bolt Aug 3, 2025, 12:28 AM

#

split veldt Sorry

nah dont worry

split veldt Aug 3, 2025, 12:29 AM

#

low tartan 😭

Ekats wronggg

fierce bolt Aug 3, 2025, 12:36 AM

#

sweet dreams emi

split veldt Aug 3, 2025, 12:38 AM

#

Yes

#

I read the can u walks

#

I'm not that dynki

fierce bolt Aug 3, 2025, 12:38 AM

#

yea you didnt reply so i thought you slept

split veldt Aug 3, 2025, 12:39 AM

#

Naur

#

I feel weodd

#

But i

#

Not good

fierce bolt Aug 3, 2025, 12:39 AM

#

doesnt feel good?

split veldt Aug 3, 2025, 12:39 AM

#

I feel lfike I'ms in the past

fierce bolt Aug 3, 2025, 12:40 AM

#

how so?

split veldt Aug 3, 2025, 12:45 AM

#

Flashabck

#

I'm back

#

Fuck

fierce bolt Aug 3, 2025, 12:46 AM

#

you had a flashback?

split veldt Aug 3, 2025, 12:57 AM

#

Sorry

#

I'm

#

Probably just drink

#

I'm sorry

#

I should fo

#

I'ms orry everyone

#

Thank you

#

Bye

#

Sorry

fierce bolt Aug 3, 2025, 12:59 AM

#

no its fine, really, if you want to talk lets just talk

split veldt Aug 3, 2025, 1:01 AM

#

It's fine

#

I'm fine

fierce bolt Aug 3, 2025, 1:02 AM

#

you dont wanna talk?

split veldt Aug 3, 2025, 1:02 AM

#

I'm just

#

Being weird rn

#

I'm drink

#

Drank

#

Drunk***

#

Wtf

#

Anyway

#

Sorry

fierce bolt Aug 3, 2025, 1:02 AM

#

i dont really care if you are drunk

#

i just wanna talk to you

split veldt Aug 3, 2025, 1:03 AM

#

I dunno

#

It's not even the 4th so idk why I'm acting like fhis

fierce bolt Aug 3, 2025, 1:05 AM

#

i dont see a problem with how you are acting

#

dont worry about it

split veldt Aug 3, 2025, 1:05 AM

#

Oh

#

Sorry

#

I just realized it is the 4th tomorrow

fierce bolt Aug 3, 2025, 1:06 AM

#

is something coming up for the 4th?

split veldt Aug 3, 2025, 1:07 AM

#

No

#

Just

#

Am annverssary? Idk what to call it

#

Yay autocorrect is wlrminggg

#

Qoeking

#

Oh nvm

fierce bolt Aug 3, 2025, 1:09 AM

#

split veldt Am annverssary? Idk what to call it

ohh, what anniversary?

split veldt Aug 3, 2025, 1:09 AM

#

It's a weird date for em

#

Me

#

#

Clean streak date

#

Last attempt date

#

Sa date

#

All on the 4th

#

Oh right

#

Getting kicked out of the dorm date

#

Very ba dtjing happemss to me on gje 4rh

#

That's kuce

#

Nice

#

#

Oh

#

Um obersharing

#

I'll regret tjs. Wjen I'm sober

fierce bolt Aug 3, 2025, 1:12 AM

#

well atleast it does tell you that you have endured a year and going strong

#

bruh my messages wont load

#

i think my wifi is fried

split veldt Aug 3, 2025, 1:13 AM

#

It okay

#

I might lass out mayway

#

Pass

#

Anywya

#

Brug

#

Brih

#

Fuck this shyt

fierce bolt Aug 3, 2025, 1:13 AM

#

its fine i get what you are saying

#

dont think about it too much, i'll ask if i dont know what it means

split veldt Aug 3, 2025, 1:14 AM

#

Okiii

#

I think mom is mad t mw

#

I told hergidnight and sne hladed

#

Glarif

#

Glarid

fierce bolt Aug 3, 2025, 1:15 AM

#

glared

#

i know

split veldt Aug 3, 2025, 1:15 AM

#

Sorri

fierce bolt Aug 3, 2025, 1:15 AM

#

dont worry about it, like i said, just type what you want, i'll ask what it is if i dont know

split veldt Aug 3, 2025, 1:15 AM

#

I ocan't balme her ifsjes mad

fierce bolt Aug 3, 2025, 1:16 AM

#

why not?

split veldt Aug 3, 2025, 1:16 AM

#

I di get drink in fromt of her

fierce bolt Aug 3, 2025, 1:16 AM

#

you dont really deserve that

split veldt Aug 3, 2025, 1:16 AM

#

Wjich is bad

#

I actually do

fierce bolt Aug 3, 2025, 1:16 AM

#

she doesnt like people getting drunk?

split veldt Aug 3, 2025, 1:16 AM

#

She syas I emberresed her

#

I probabli did

#

I actuallu wish I waz ded

#

And see if shid cate

#

Care

fierce bolt Aug 3, 2025, 1:17 AM

#

split veldt I probabli did

you dont even know the reason

split veldt Aug 3, 2025, 1:18 AM

#

fierce bolt you dont even know the reason

But shes Lways right ao

#

So*

fierce bolt Aug 3, 2025, 1:18 AM

#

split veldt And see if shid cate

you have so many people here who would actually care about you if you were gone

fierce bolt Aug 3, 2025, 1:18 AM

#

split veldt But shes Lways right ao

nah, not everyone is always right

split veldt Aug 3, 2025, 1:18 AM

#

fierce bolt you have so many people here who would actually care about you if you were gone

I kniw but im a replacible person sl

#

So

#

split veldt Aug 3, 2025, 1:19 AM

#

fierce bolt nah, not everyone is always right

She and ardit are eight tho

fierce bolt Aug 3, 2025, 1:19 AM

#

split veldt I kniw but im a replacible person sl

you cant really replace someone

split veldt Aug 3, 2025, 1:19 AM

#

You're eightttt

#

You can ja find someone bettar

fierce bolt Aug 3, 2025, 1:20 AM

#

no it doesnt work like that

split veldt Aug 3, 2025, 1:20 AM

#

Sorri thats toksik

fierce bolt Aug 3, 2025, 1:20 AM

#

memories arent something you can erase

fierce bolt Aug 3, 2025, 1:20 AM

#

split veldt Sorri thats toksik

its how you feel, you can express it

split veldt Aug 3, 2025, 1:20 AM

#

Peple can build new omes

fierce bolt Aug 3, 2025, 1:21 AM

#

but they cant forgo the old ones

split veldt Aug 3, 2025, 1:21 AM

#

fierce bolt its how you feel, you can express it

It's not gud tho

fierce bolt Aug 3, 2025, 1:21 AM

#

if its lets you vent i reckon its good

split veldt Aug 3, 2025, 1:21 AM

#

fierce bolt but they cant forgo the old ones

Tjey van ffusn on new ons

split veldt Aug 3, 2025, 1:21 AM

#

fierce bolt if its lets you vent i reckon its good

I'm js overreactink

fierce bolt Aug 3, 2025, 1:21 AM

#

even if they find new ones

#

you cant forget the old ones

split veldt Aug 3, 2025, 1:22 AM

#

Slowli the will 💯🔥

fierce bolt Aug 3, 2025, 1:22 AM

#

split veldt I'm js overreactink

nah, how you feel isnt overreacting

split veldt Aug 3, 2025, 1:23 AM

#

fierce bolt nah, how you feel isnt overreacting

Haha it onda is

fierce bolt Aug 3, 2025, 1:23 AM

#

split veldt Slowli the will 💯🔥

yea, you can move on but you wont forget

fierce bolt Aug 3, 2025, 1:23 AM

#

split veldt Haha it onda is

how so?

split veldt Aug 3, 2025, 1:23 AM

#

fierce bolt how so?

I miean it's been 3 years I ahold atop thinking about it

fierce bolt Aug 3, 2025, 1:24 AM

#

split veldt I miean it's been 3 years I ahold atop thinking about it

its because its unresolved

#

you never really had the chance to vent nor cope with it

#

thats why you still couldnt move on

split veldt Aug 3, 2025, 1:25 AM

#

I acn I'm js

#

Overreactink

fierce bolt Aug 3, 2025, 1:25 AM

#

even if you were, it comes from a source, it comes from you, you are hurt, you arent overreacting

split veldt Aug 3, 2025, 1:26 AM

#

I'm findeeee

#

Tyyyyyy

fierce bolt Aug 3, 2025, 1:27 AM

#

well you do need to know that you dont always need to be happy, for someone else, when you are sad you can just be sad, you dont have to force yourself to be happy because of someone or because you dont want others to see you sad

split veldt Aug 3, 2025, 1:28 AM

#

I mean

#

What would atlkin anoit it solve

#

All I've gotten is "peple vahe it worse"

fierce bolt Aug 3, 2025, 1:29 AM

#

people getting having it worse doesnt undermine what you have gone through

#

in fact i could say that you have it worse than a lot of people

#

so why can people who hurt a little get help but you cant

split veldt Aug 3, 2025, 5:19 AM

#

Sober emi here

#

Last night I was fucked up

#

Sorry

jagged urchin Aug 3, 2025, 5:20 AM

#

Dont apologize are you okay?

split veldt Aug 3, 2025, 5:22 AM

#

Yeah

fierce bolt Aug 3, 2025, 5:27 AM

#

welcome back emi huddleheartshape

split veldt Aug 3, 2025, 6:01 AM

#

fierce bolt welcome back emi <:huddleheartshape:854758759770750978>

Tyty

split veldt Aug 3, 2025, 7:02 PM

#

Um.

#

I just told mom about what used to happen at my dorm

#

And now she hates everyone there

#

So

#

Yeah

#

It was a pretty messed up place

summer goblet Aug 3, 2025, 7:03 PM

#

well she wants to protect you

#

she loves you

#

a lot

split veldt Aug 3, 2025, 7:03 PM

#

Bro spawned

#

Yeah I get that

#

Her anger gets the best of her

summer goblet Aug 3, 2025, 7:03 PM

#

i havent been here in a while

#

i didnt know if i was helping or not

#

yeah

#

same thing with my mom

#

all parents do thatr

#

becuase

#

when

#

they feel like

#

they are losing their grip on their child

#

it feels hard for them

#

and they feel anger

#

that anger

#

takes over

#

the fear

#

the fear is whats underneath

#

they are scared for you

#

because the scariest thing possible for them

#

is to lose you

#

im sorry if me talking in unfinished sentences is annoying

#

i just developed a sorta twith for thatr

#

/:

#

my point is

#

its scary

#

for everyone here

#

and we dont want to lose you

split veldt Aug 3, 2025, 7:07 PM

#

summer goblet im sorry if me talking in unfinished sentences is annoying

Nah you're good

summer goblet Aug 3, 2025, 7:08 PM

#

okay

#

well

#

i have to go

#

im glad you're feeling better

#

i was really scared last night. sorry i didnt say anything

split veldt Aug 3, 2025, 7:09 PM

#

You don't have to yk

#

Well

#

Baiii

#

Ty

summer goblet Aug 3, 2025, 7:10 PM

#

👋

split veldt Aug 5, 2025, 11:33 AM

#

Crazy work

#

Screenshot_2025-08-05-02-32-04-538_com.openai.chatgpt.jpg

unkempt ravine Aug 5, 2025, 12:21 PM

#

I hope things turn around for you soon enough emi sadness

split veldt Aug 5, 2025, 2:28 PM

#

I'm gonna write more poems fs

unkempt ravine Aug 5, 2025, 4:50 PM

#

writing them made me feel sm better so I feel like the same should go for you

split veldt Aug 5, 2025, 9:09 PM

#

“Fourteen Candles”

She was quiet at three, with big, wondering eyes,
A girl full of questions, but never “whys.”
She learned not to ask, to smile and obey,
To shrink when the world pushed her out of the way.

At five, she was praised for being so good,
For sitting up straight and doing what she should.
Her shoes were kept clean, her hair always neat,
She learned being perfect meant biting her seat.

At seven, the noise in the house got too loud,
So she learned to be silence inside of a crowd.
When dishes got thrown and the door slammed shut,
She’d hide with her toys and keep her mouth shut.

At nine, she made friends who would laugh then ignore,
They liked her in whispers but nothing more.
She gave them her crayons, her snacks, and her time,
They gave her back silence, as cold as a crime.

At ten, she wrote poems in lined-up notebooks,
Of monsters and rainclouds and sideways looks.
But no one would read them, no one would see
The fire she buried beneath lock and key.

At twelve, she was shrinking inside of her skin,
Too tall, too wide, not pretty or thin.
She skipped out on lunch and she counted her bones,
Pretending the hunger was hers alone.

At thirteen, she bled in the bath just to feel
A moment of something that might have been real.
But no one had noticed, and no one had guessed
The ache in her chest or the weight on her breast.

At fourteen, the candles burned slow on her cake,
But nobody saw how her hands would shake.
They clapped and they smiled and told her to blow,
But the wish in her throat was a quiet, “No.”

That night she wrote just a sentence and folded it tight:
"I tried to hold on. But nothing felt right."
She closed her eyes before morning could come—
And the world just moved on, as if nothing was done.

split veldt Aug 5, 2025, 9:36 PM

#

Wow.

#

My brother

#

The one person who's always been the only one to stay close to m

#

Just called me fat

#

How can people say what I'm doing is dangerous when look at what they say

#

Not everyone is wrong

#

If everyone comments on something how can it be wrong?

#

Fuck ts I'll just drown in music and poems again.

split veldt Aug 5, 2025, 11:25 PM

#

Oh no

#

Oh no

#

Wtf

#

I feel a panic attack

#

Huh

#

Why

#

What

#

Fuck

split veldt Aug 5, 2025, 11:43 PM

#

I'm fine.

#

Something feels off tho

#

I'm not upset at something or someone

#

But I feel off

split veldt Aug 6, 2025, 12:20 AM

#

“The Room with No Door”

There’s a room I once built in the back of my mind,
With walls made of whispers I tried to unwind.
The floorboards would creak with each step of regret,
And the ceiling would drip with the things I forget.

I hung up some laughter to make it feel bright,
Taped memories on windows to filter the light.
I painted the silence a welcoming hue,
Pretended the cracks never let sorrow through.

I planted fake flowers that never would wilt,
Covered the bloodstains in layers of guilt.
I smiled through the hole where the mirror once hung,
The glass long since shattered by words left unsung.

No clocks in this place — time never dared pass,
Just echoes of questions I never could ask.
A heartbeat on loop like a ghost’s lullaby,
A breath held so long it forgot how to sigh.

People would knock, I’d say, “Nothing’s wrong.”
And sing them my pain in a different song.
But behind all the verses, beneath every rhyme,
Lurked moments that broke me, one sliver at a time.

And I? I stayed sitting in dust and decay,
Convincing myself I still wanted to stay.
‘Til the day that the room grew too small for the ache,
And the walls folded in with each lie I would fake.

No door ever built, no path to escape,
Just a girl made of silence, dissolving in shape.
So the room took her whole, like it always had planned—
Now just ashes remain, and a flickering hand.

They’ll say, She was quiet, but always seemed fine.
While erasing her name from the edge of the line.
But that room still stands, in the corners of minds,
Where the hurting ones go when the world feels unkind.

split veldt Aug 6, 2025, 7:32 PM

#

Moms angry mumbles scare me

#

She's pretty mad

#

I'm scared

#

Very scared

#

My heart

#

Hurts

#

I hate this

#

I hate her

#

I hate me

#

I just want to

#

Breathe

#

I didn't even do anything

#

I never did anything

#

But

#

She hates me

#

She hates me very badly

#

What am I supposed to do

#

I don't know

#

I don't know

#

I'm scared

#

When she's mad she stays mad for days

#

I feel like its over

#

My chance is over

#

She'll always hate me

#

I was so right

#

She left

#

She didn't say goodnight

#

She doesn't care at all

#

She never did

#

I can't stop crying

#

I want to stop

#

I wish I could just stop

#

Not just the tears

#

I wish I could stop everything

#

"The Lullaby Stayed"

She was just five when she first heard the song,
A soft little tune that hummed all night long.
Her mother would sing it, low and slow,
As shadows crept in and the moonlight would glow.

“Close your eyes, don’t make a sound,
Dreams are soft where peace is found.
Let the dark be kind tonight,
Sleep until the morning light.”

She slept with that voice wrapped tight like a thread,
It followed her even when mom wasn't there.
At twelve, she’d hum it with tears in her bed,
When no one noticed, or no one cared.

“Close your eyes, don’t make a sound,
Dreams are soft where peace is found…”
But peace was a ghost in her cluttered mind,
And dreams were the only escape she could find.

At sixteen, the song grew strangely loud,
A whisper that echoed above every crowd.
She’d press her palms tight over her ears,
But still, it would crawl through all of her fears.

She tried to forget it, pushed it away,
But the lullaby clung like the end of a day.
It wrapped round her ribs, it coiled her spine,
And sang to her even when she was fine.

At twenty, she stood on a rooftop alone,
The wind in her hair like a chiseled stone.
No one below ever looked up to see
The girl with a song and a silent plea.

“Close your eyes, don’t make a sound…”
She mouthed the words, without a sound.
The wind did not beg her to stay.
The stars did not light up her way.

She stepped.

And for once—
The lullaby stopped.

split veldt Aug 7, 2025, 4:45 PM

#

I'm scared

#

I'm really scared

#

Mom is mad again

#

She started cursing me again

#

She says I'm her enemy not her daughter

#

She says I don't deserve to be her daughter

#

Maybe she's right

#

She's always right

#

She said she'll tell dad

#

And that when dad comes back home next week

#

She'll tell him

#

And that she's going to ask for help from him

#

And that dad will deal with me

#

I'm scared

#

I'm really scared

#

What if he does something bad

#

What if he also gets mad at me

#

It gets scary when he's mad

#

Very scary

#

I don't want to breathe anymore

#

I don't want to deal with this

#

I just want to have peace

#

I just want to be okay

#

And

#

Happy

#

But she got mad at me

#

Because I didn't do one thing

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After I cleaned the whole house

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She's mad I didn't pass the mop

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She got really mad

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She says she wants to take me back to my old village

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I'm scared

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Idk what dad will do

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I'm really scared

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My heart hurts again

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My whole body is numb

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I'm scared