First thing , sorry dear whoever random person who might read this , my english and grammar are terrible and im also a lazy writer .
Second thing , I realized I forget how I used to feel about people after a while it would be nice for me to look back at these and see how I used to view different people .
Third thing , it is going to be a pretty light hearted journal with nothing extreme or triggering also its going to be pretty boring too and yea thats it
#Just Rand0m
still igloo
Day 0:
how I feel about people?
I love my fam which includes my mom , dad , aunties , granny and uncles(not my fathers brothers tho lol im pretty indifferent toward them)
Im cool with my classmates and professors and I dont mind them , altho I whole heartedly hate a classmate which lets refer to him as "J"
I dont know anything about my neighbours I dont know any of them
what I did today?
I did some very light workout , watched some youtube , played some online games , did some studies , It felt like an average day
anything else?
hmmm I used to have a crush on a person lets refer to them as "M" yet I decided Im too cool(note to my future kids: big ego is very bad kids) to confess to them and I kinda regret that choice , last night I had a dream that I actually confessed this time and when I woke up I regretted that choice even more I hope I can move on
still igloo
Day 1:
how I feel about people?
nothing has really changed about my feelings I didnt had any social interactions today
what I did today?
did my workouts , studied , played some online games , listened to music , just boring stuff
anything else?
I did some researches and projects about aquifers which I feel proud of I felt brilliant
still igloo
Day 2:
how I feel about people?
nothing atm
what I did today?
did my workouts , studied but less than usual , I realized geologists have never agreed on a thing with eachother ever thats why this branch of science never evolved enough
anything else?
I just find it weird that as an extrovert I actually enjoy silence and loneliness
still igloo
Day 3:
how I feel about people?
nothing atm
what I did today?
did some studies played some online games
anything else?
Im taking a break from games they got boring
still igloo
Day 4:
how I feel about people?
I feel like Ive finally moved on and I dont hate the people I used to hate altho it may also be the reason that I havent seen them for sometime my hatred would probably return when I see those people again specially that J guy
what I did today?
Im not even sure I was super inefficient today I need to get back to my routine
anything else?
yea I think I need to spend some time on shopping , socializing and enjoying things outside of my house also I have to shave my beard
still igloo
day5:
Im just super bored and Im doing nothing so nothing to share for today
still igloo
day6:
I played tons of video games but it felt good I just kept winning
still igloo
Dear non-existent readers and the future me , I'm on vacation so no updates for a couple of weeks
still igloo
Day 1.1:
So Ive been planning on a new routine with tons of self improvements and I'm planning to make my 1st video game by the end of this year
I've created a single sprite rn lol
still igloo
Day 2.1:
Some days just keep getting worse and worse today was a terrible day just in general
I shouted at an old woman
still igloo
Day 3.1 and 4.1:
Ok so I did a decent job at university today , I recently came up with a theory that my mental health and the amount of money I have are directly connected and I think it's true lol
still igloo
Day 5.1:
So I played way too much video game too much , I recently started to have a crush on someone from our class but I decided to forget it since I'm too busy for a relationship
still igloo
Day 6.1:
I was looking at my life , I lost my girlfriend, my friends , my happiness, physical health and mental health , I lost everything because of just playing too much video games ... Feels depressing thinking about it
still igloo
Just deleted 300gb of video games on my PC I'm a free soul now ready for self improvement
still igloo
Day 8.1: back to the boxing gym , I'm pretty nervous ... For my nose!!!
Also , yesterday I was going to the elevator and that J guy that I hate actually kept the door open for me so I can use it too
While I still can't forgive him I might give him a phone call and talk about the drama between us
still igloo
Day 9.1 had a good day at university
My mom uncle has died today and well rip to him we won't miss him tho
still igloo
Day 10.1 : Just had an argument with an ex-friend
I also decided I would never forgive that J dude
My ego gets hurt everytime people try to remind me my failures in my relationships so I raged and punched them :/
still igloo
Day 12.1:
Im tirelessly studying im proud of me
still igloo
Side note: my journals are getting shorter and shorter everytime I write , it either means I'm getting more depressed everyday or maybe I'm getting busier idk which one
still igloo
Sorry for the late update alright this is going to be a long one
I realized I can not make new friends or get into a serious relationship because I simply don't want to , I feel a bit too good to be good with people but it actually comes from the fact that my previous friends hurt me deep
I'm fine with who I am and I'm actually enjoying being myself by myself
still igloo
I feel like my mental is going back to an unhealthy spot
I don't have the discipline and concentration I used to have
I keep having nightmares
I feel like I'm isolating myself from people because I'm afraid to get hurt
still igloo
I'm getting better , I have better discipline, I talk to people and hold my ground in arguments easily
I've been feeling self improvement again which is nice 🙂
still igloo
Today I decided to let go off my demons and start a better day and it actually worked out
I got offered an opportunity of lifetime by one of my professors
still igloo
I have a pretty hardcore exam today hoping I would do well
still igloo
So next exam on the way and I can't freaking(lol language) sleep
still igloo
Omg exams were terrific time to chill for a while
still igloo
My skin feels like a baby I'm glad my skincare routines worked out
still igloo
Sometimes I like to take a break from life then return with much stronger will power
still igloo
Ok tomorrow is the last exam
I'm not into religion but any type of prayers and positive energy is appreciated 🙏
still igloo
I just realized I feel sad sometimes I bottle up my emotions a lot but I never show that to anyone I always stand strong and I'm proud of the person I become
still igloo
I should start going back to grinding I've been lazy lately
still igloo
I had yet another not productive enough day
The problem is everytime I do something good i get cocky and become lazy
still igloo
Almost a year ago it was my birthday , me and my friends were hanging out in our favourite spot and it was a lovely day.
We had a group picture , now that I look at that picture I can't find a single friend in that
Funny how people's relationship can change so fast in less than a year