:3

[chilly kestrel]

I'm one of the cool kids

[trail jungle]

Press 1 if you are queer

[chilly kestrel]

1

111111111111

[real cairn]

https://tenor.com/view/lizard-lizard-lizard-button-lizard-tom-the-lizard-pixar-gif-17194109322617058326

[chilly kestrel]

https://tenor.com/view/lets-go-gambling-gif-3937562841362806777

cant believe that when i joined this server for the first time in 2020 i was a "cishet" 16 year old

And now i'm neither of those

[trail jungle]

1

[trail jungle]

Which cis, heterosexual, 16 or in the year 2020

[chilly kestrel]

Uhhhhhhhhhhhh

Pass

[restive sinew]

:3

[trail jungle]

Well according to your bio you are not 16 and I am pretty confident it is not the year 2020

[chilly kestrel]

You get my damn point

:3

[trail jungle]

I am just messing with you

[chilly kestrel]

True

[quasi pike]

:3c

[spark beacon]

@dire junco

[dire junco]

[spark beacon]

I counted 16 people in this thread that I know are queer

I counted 23 people in total

that means that the estimated queer rate of this thread is ~69.6%

nice

[magic condor]

mrr did you include me

[prisma roost]

all of em end in g for me

[prisma roost]

I'm obviously straight, I am afab and with a cis guy, so there's no way I could be queer

the funny circles in my bio are just a rouse

I definitely did not look up how to spell ruse/rouse

I did not think it was spelled rouge

[arctic surge]

Any of y'all remember those turn into a mermaid/werewolf/vampire videos on YouTube?

I have a theory about those videos and being trans

[crisp crater]

Where did I fall on this

[prisma roost]

I miss cuddles so much :(

i just been sobbing and sobbing :/

[trail jungle]

And you definitely didn’t react 1 to my previous message

[prisma roost]

definitely

[chilly kestrel]

Good morning :3

[trail jungle]

Hello

[chilly kestrel]

haiiiiii

[slow prism]

:3

[trail jungle]

Hey @chilly kestrel do you have any plans for Valentines day, just out of curiosity

[chilly kestrel]

https://tenor.com/view/hotel-mario-mario-cdi-no-refusal-gif-3231775313720996150

Like I ever do

[trail jungle]

Dang

I mean you could still do something with friends, assuming you have those

[chilly kestrel]

https://tenor.com/view/bahaha-lol-hd-gif-minion-minion-laugh-gif-2154867417577880306

[trail jungle]

You have a cat probably, right

Whatever you could just treat yourself, heck most of us are probably going to do that anyway for Valentines day

[chilly kestrel]

I dont even have a cat

Just a dog

He's very soft :3

[trail jungle]

Oo what kind of dog

[chilly kestrel]

idk

[spark beacon]

I think I put you in “don’t know”

[trail jungle]

That dog is very cute, I also have dogs, specifically three huskies

[spark beacon]

I love huskies

[trail jungle]

Here I’ll see if I can find a picture of them

Here is some recent ones of them in the snow

[chilly kestrel]

Ripping this out of subs main

No need to hyperventilate about it

[trail jungle]

Good luck

[chilly kestrel]

Ehheh

I'm gonna hide it as long as possible probably

But if mom asks then well. Cross that bridge when we come to it

And thankfully I got a lot of friends (some of them here) I can go to for advice

[trail jungle]

You know what they say, you shouldn't cross a bridge without stability

[chilly kestrel]

I know mom has some trans friends but like thats different than your actual child

So thats whats so weird about it to me

Again, been dropping hints. Dropped a couple more yesterday like talking with a slightly higher pitch or saying some vague shit that i dont remember exactly

[trail jungle]

Oh, then if that is the case I would doubt she would see that as unacceptable for her child, but it make sense to still be uneasy about it

[chilly kestrel]

Yeah maybe

I mean, if I really think about it, she's practically covered in tats, so. One permanent body thing to another

Dad has a good amount but not as many. I have none and still don't plan to get one but thats ok

We all do our own shit

[trail jungle]

And sometimes we are full of it

[trail jungle]

What is that flag in the bottom left corner in the first 4

Actually looking at it, it looks to be trans but it is hard to tell

[quasi pike]

yes

[trail jungle]

ok thank you

What would the other pride flags look like though

I mean for the intense text

Pansexuallity would probably be "NOT ATTRACTED TO KITCHENWARE"

[prisma roost]

somebody for whatever reason took the top right seriously

[prisma roost]

questionable choice but I'll take it I guess

[trail jungle]

How is everyone doing so far

[chilly kestrel]

Sleepy

Its been a big day despite the fact that I've barely done anything

[prisma roost]

not well and I can't help it :'

[trail jungle]

I'm sorry, is there a reason for you feelings of unwellness

[prisma roost]

seemingly not

[trail jungle]

Would you enjoy the representation of a hug through a emoji on Discord

[prisma roost]

yeah sure

[prisma roost]

sorry for the bad vibes I been bringing

[trail jungle]

Hey, you’re fine, sometimes the bad vibes happen

[trail jungle]

And sometimes telling someone about them is good for you, especially when it is someone you trust, like presumably us

[trail jungle]

https://tenor.com/view/anime-anime-love-anime-girl-anime-girl-shy-gif-17462286460221095988

[chilly kestrel]

I like this chat

https://tenor.com/view/sprigatito-cat-sleep-gif-9659299830670091871

[trail jungle]

:3

[dire junco]

:3

[slow prism]

:3

[chilly kestrel]

:33333333

[spark beacon]

:3

[arctic surge]

:3

[magic condor]

:3c

[quasi pike]

:3c

[dire junco]

:3

[trail jungle]

:3

[trail jungle]

How is everyone’s day so far

[chilly kestrel]

Work

Mom noticed i went to bed early last night cause i was overwhelmed with (positive) emotions and just fell asleep at 7:30

"Haha just tired" yep

I think this is just the unofficial lgbt+ chat of the server at this point (i like that)

Cant believe i didnt know about this chat until recently

[trail jungle]

Wait so why did you go to bed early

[chilly kestrel]

Cause i was tired but actually just overwhelmed with emotions yesterday

It"s complicated i guess :3

But I was realizing at work today that I kinda started defaulting to using a more feminine voice lately. Cool. Might record myself later to see the progress. :3

Noticed a huge difference between that and my rough sounding boyvoice so thats cooooooooool

[trail jungle]

Oh sick

[chilly kestrel]

Still got a ways to go

Watching youtube videos tends to help get an idea

Still cis tho

[trail jungle]

YEP

These are the things a cis person would definitely say and do

[chilly kestrel]

https://tenor.com/view/sprigatito-pokemon-pokemon-scarlet-pokemon-violet-sprigatito-pokemon-plush-gif-16277160717753244877

Absolutely!

[spark beacon]

I am proud to be op of this chat lol

lol

https://tenor.com/view/riddler-paul-dano-new-rockstars-thumbnail-does-he-know-he-doesnt-know-gif-27552850

[trail jungle]

Balls

[spark beacon]

smash balls even

[trail jungle]

Woah

[chilly kestrel]

https://tenor.com/view/get-real-cat-cat-on-skateboard-funny-cat-gif-3092305321523848077

[chilly kestrel]

o7 we salute your service

pffffff i got one too

https://tenor.com/view/bahaha-lol-hd-gif-minion-minion-laugh-gif-2154867417577880306

No the fuuuuuuuuck you aren't lmao

https://tenor.com/view/time-gif-5911010216158566067

[trail jungle]

This image represents the Testosterone you don’t want to have, right Spriga, that is why the man has his hands in the shape of a T

[chilly kestrel]

Sure fuck it why not

[slow prism]

I can’t even check my old account’s messages to see if I said I’m straight

How long has Coby had an alt?

[trail jungle]

That is a good question

Also I have checked and I have never said I was straight

So uh

[chilly kestrel]

Let's all be silly together

[slow prism]

https://tenor.com/view/cat-cute-happy-jumping-gif-26555219

[trail jungle]

https://tenor.com/view/cheese-challenge-cat-fall-off-table-taking-a-tumble-cheese-on-head-gif-1757873524679935804

[trail jungle]

:3

[spark beacon]

https://tenor.com/view/ralsei-deltarune-pet-valeria-fills-pet-the-goat-boi-gif-3395337838494213000

[spark beacon]

tried to put on eyeliner but the eyeliner I had was too old to work and it was a weird brown color that didn’t show up at all

I’m gonna have to drive in my car and buy some

[chilly kestrel]

Yeah ive tried that before

I realize ive been using my higher voice around everyone more even my parents

It's just my default now 😭

[chilly kestrel]

Tried to steal some from my mom's shelf once but it was also old. She doesnt really wear makeup anyways

They haven't said anything or commented on it or anything but I secretly recorded myself talking to them when I got home cause I wanted to hear how my voice sounded on a recording. Dear lord. It's actually not that bad, I sound a LOT more fem than like, 75% of the trans-related youtube rabbit hole videos I've gone down the past few months

So. That's good, huh

[restive sinew]

I need to work on this and figure out how to actually do this...I am so fucking masc sounding and I hate it so bad

[chilly kestrel]

I've only been at this for a few weeks 😭

Maybe I should trim the recordings down and send the clips of my voice over

Just to see

[restive sinew]

I also have a large number of messages confidently talking about being cis with my friends for upwards of 6 years after I started doubting whether or not I'm cis before I finally accepted being trans :3

[chilly kestrel]

Real

When did you accept it or start doubting

(I like seeing everyone's journeys :3)

I'm just gonna say this is kinda super recent for me, ive been sorta questioning it for a couple years yeah but everything only just kinda fell apart like 2 months ago and it all just kinda hit me

[restive sinew]

started doubting in like late 2018/early 2019 I don't remember exactly, and finally accepted it late 2024, and was like, im making up for lost time and immediately started looking for ways for me to get hrt

[chilly kestrel]

I just made my appointment yesterday that was what i was going through emotionwise yesterday

I gotta start, just. Get into it so that i dont lose that time

Its not until May 1st tho cause i'm dumb and scheduled it too far out (its fine)

[restive sinew]

it took nearly a full year(about 9 months) from there to actually start on estrogen, and then almost immediately following that I lost access to the E cause of some issues with availability, and so I was only on E for like 2 months, then 3 months off, and now im starting again with an easier way to get it, and I've been on that coming up on 3 weeks now

[chilly kestrel]

Well sorry you had to get off of it

I hope i can stay on it as long as possible

[restive sinew]

I have a number of things that made doctors hesitant to prescribe E to me(one of which is already having a genetic condition which makes me have a higher disposition to clot) and so I had to do some weird shit to actually finally get it, hopefully you have an easier time

[chilly kestrel]

If i get to start in a couple months

[restive sinew]

just

[chilly kestrel]

Sounds really cool

Alright i can send a short clip of my voice from having my phone in my pocket when i got home from work and was walking into my parentd watching the superbowl

Maybe

Theres a LOT of background noise

guh

[restive sinew]

if they try to get you on patches...if you're not in like the far north, it's not worth it, they suck to keep on your body, they're really hard to get(reason why I wasn't on E for nearly 3 months), and they're just cringe

[chilly kestrel]

Pills are good right

[restive sinew]

pills are fine

[chilly kestrel]

Or injections but needles are weird

And what if i miss lol

[restive sinew]

injections are op

you can't miss

it's like not possible

[chilly kestrel]

Oh i thought u had to like put it into a specific part

[restive sinew]

no it's just like stab yourself with a needle in the thigh

and put the estrogen in

injections have been so nice for me, it's once a week so it's kind of set and forget, and you get a really consistent amount of estrogen that supposedly simulates how estrogen production and stuff works in women's bodies

if you don't have issues with needles I would highly recommend, but pills are definitely fine as well

just whichever is easier for you to get/you can afford, any E is better than no E afterall

[chilly kestrel]

Lotta background noise and i edited out my parents talking but this is what i sound like from when i was chatting with them when i got home (theyre watching the super bowl)

My phone was in my pocket when i recorded this secretly

My voice sounds so different to some old youtube videos i made in 2023 that i talked in

[spark beacon]

I know next to nothing about voice training but I have a high pitched voice naturally

[chilly kestrel]

Like, i ALMOST sound like a totally different person

But theres still parts of 2023 me in there

[chilly kestrel]

Is that untrained???

[spark beacon]

yes

[chilly kestrel]

😭

You're gonna pass so well

[spark beacon]

idk I just never really got a high pitched voice

[chilly kestrel]

I sound like, fine. Better than a decent chunk of trans videos ive watched lately but not all

[chilly kestrel]

Like

[spark beacon]

I hope I don’t tho im worried my voice is gonna get a lot deeper in a few years

[chilly kestrel]

Have some of those videos even tried voice training

Arent you like 18

[spark beacon]

ya I turn 18 in 2 months

[chilly kestrel]

😭

unc status here

[spark beacon]

I look a lot younger than I am tho a lot of people think im 15

[chilly kestrel]

Well 18s kinda late to have your voice change, one of the kids i used to play with when i was a kid who was a few years older than me still sounds kinda high pitched well into his 20s

(And he's like the last one left that still lives here)

[spark beacon]

I hope that my love for cheese and milk and ice cream provided me enough natural estrogen and that’s why I look and sound feminine

[chilly kestrel]

Oh is that why i like milk?

https://tenor.com/view/shocked-computer-smile-yellow-smile-surprised-gif-26981337

Anyways yeah your voice sounds good

Mine is a little worse but im also 21. And thats only with like, barely a month of actively trying to sound feminine

But, i think i actually sound not that terrible on a recording for the first time in my life. Maybe i'll do more of that when noone else is home

Doin good, doin good

I had a strawberry milk and a third of a 52oz cold coffee today

Really into that stuff

[arctic surge]

Meow :3

[chilly kestrel]

haiiii

Cause thats how we say it

[arctic surge]

Hewwowo

[chilly kestrel]

Woa

[quasi pike]

[chilly kestrel]

Yayyyyy

[dire junco]

You sound so cute

[quasi pike]

:3

[slow prism]

:3

[dire junco]

:3

[chilly kestrel]

:3

We all just get to be like. So silly here.

And that's cool

[spark beacon]

thank you for some reason this is a really good compliment

[prisma roost]

last exam today!

let's hope i don't fuck up

[trail jungle]

I am sure you will do great

[prisma roost]

tbh this one went surprisingly well

feel kinda good

[chilly kestrel]

[prisma roost]

I'm also really excited for tomorrow cause in finally gonna get a tattoo again

[chilly kestrel]

https://tenor.com/view/mggaow-cat-mggaow-cat-doorbell-camera-gif-27705989

Last night i was chatting with mom while she was doing yarn stuff like usual, i asked what one thing was and mom said "it's a headband. Like, girls accessories."
Without thinking or even a second thought i put the yarn headband on my head and just kinda went like "hmm" and took it off

We're going to the mall on Thursday just the two of us. Guess we'll figure that out more later (but that was planned a while ago)

[trail jungle]

What are you going to get

[trail jungle]

Ooh nice

[prisma roost]

a second little guy

[trail jungle]

What is the first little guy

[prisma roost]

a fox

[trail jungle]

Nice

[spark beacon]

noodle kitten

I love noodle kittens

[prisma roost]

wait lemme see if I can find a pic of the lil guy

[chilly kestrel]

Wahhhhhh i want my appointment to hurry UPPPP

81 days to go!!! And every day I know I want it more and more

[trail jungle]

That looks sick

[chilly kestrel]

Why is it so FAR AWAY

[trail jungle]

Don’t worry, Mario Maker 3 will probably be longer

[chilly kestrel]

At least I'll be pretty when GTA 6 comes out

https://tenor.com/view/bahaha-lol-hd-gif-minion-minion-laugh-gif-2154867417577880306

and i absolutely WILL be counting down every single day

[trail jungle]

Well E takes a little bit before you start noticing changes

[chilly kestrel]

Yeah I know that

And thats why I wanna start it like, now

Instead of in almost 3 months

Ghhhhhhhh fuck

[trail jungle]

What are you expecting the most out of E

[trail jungle]

Huh, I don’t feel any different

But anyway, how was everyone’s day

[chilly kestrel]

Being happy :D

Or like, all of it. Even the bad. Less strength? Less cold tolerance? Fuck it, gimme

[prisma roost]

crying all the time and having to piss all the time

[prisma roost]

I wish there was a way for this for me

[arctic surge]

Crying all the time>emotionally numb all the time

[chilly kestrel]

PLEASE IM SICK OF BEING EMOTIONALLY NUMB

I GET TO FEEL SOMETHING???

[trail jungle]

What about any body part adjustments

[chilly kestrel]

https://tenor.com/view/sponge-bob-mmhmm-fish-yes-gif-23728894

I've done the research. If I gotta hide shit I'll hide it

[trail jungle]

Yeah you got to hide the booba

[chilly kestrel]

Waow

[trail jungle]

Also E gives you less tolerance to cold? How come, more or less what does T do to tolerate cold

[chilly kestrel]

Idk it was what I read

Or heard. (yt videos)

[prisma roost]

I mean I don't take take, but in comparison to my bf I'm cold more often

[chilly kestrel]

I really like my higher voice :3
I think I've been more talkative than ever this week...I still have room for improvement cause there's still some rough spots but like....woooaoaahhie it's the best it's sounded in years

[prisma roost]

I guess that's the case for some people

I don't enjoy it, I tend to feel so bad I almost need to throw up but ykniw

[chilly kestrel]

Fucking thanks euphoria

/pos

Glad I can finally start feeling free

[trail jungle]

Wait ohh, cold as the temperature, I thought we were talking about the sickness

That makes more sense

[chilly kestrel]

Yeah like when it's cold out in the winters

[spark beacon]

I already cry a lot that is part of my concern idk how much more I can cry

[trail jungle]

Press 1 if you would want headpats

[slow prism]

1

[real cairn]

1

Not a great mentals day for me.

[trail jungle]

Oh, I am sorry Fera

[real cairn]

It happens

[trail jungle]

Yeah, doesn’t mean I can’t feel sorry for you

[dire junco]

1 :3

[chilly kestrel]

1 :333

[trail jungle]

1

[spark beacon]

111111111111111111111111111111

[dire junco]

[chilly kestrel]

80 now!

https://tenor.com/view/happy-catto-cats-gif-2693509101423175460

It'll come up before I know it

[chilly kestrel]

Yo chat, quick question

I got an email about my appointment on May 1st today with like price estimates

[real cairn]

That's a statement not a question

[chilly kestrel]

It says it's gonna be like $500, no way it's that much right? It does say "estimate" but I was expecting like. Lower

Maybe cause I'm not using insurance cause I wanted to hide it

[real cairn]

Is this for HRT?

[chilly kestrel]

Yeah

[real cairn]

I would gamble it would be about that much

[chilly kestrel]

I can afford it, but. Holy shit. I hope that's only so expensive cause it's my first time

And future visits will be cheaper

[real cairn]

Speaking from my own experience you will talk with an expert. It'll be a pretty indepth conversation and of course you will need blood work which is always super expensive.

[chilly kestrel]

Oh yeah, I've only had my blood drawn one time before and that was when I was a kid

[real cairn]

The actually meds aren't that bad. Especially with GoodRX. The initial cost is pricey.

[chilly kestrel]

Shit yeah I need to look at goodrx

I've heard of it

[real cairn]

Its good

You'll probably also be getting bloodwork done about every six months. Maybe even 3 at the start to see where your hormone levels are.

[chilly kestrel]

One of the fees says "assay of testosterone" that just means they're checking my initial levels right? I don't want to get on those pills, wrong way lol

So wait yeah, future visits will be cheaper? I don't wanna pay $500 every three months

[real cairn]

Haha!

No you won't have to worry about getting on the wrong pills.

[real cairn]

Should be. It'll be more a checkup on progress.

[chilly kestrel]

Check goodrx when I'm on lunch break. Or any point in the next two months

Got plenty of time

[real cairn]

That's just for the meds mind you

It won't cover the cost of seeing the Dr

[chilly kestrel]

Waowwwie it's officialllll...even if it's not happening yet

Oh yeah. I can pay the $500 like, once, that's fine (it's actually 566), just I don't want to do that over and over

Def would be losing money at that point

So yeah, good advice. I guess that's just cause I'm new :3
Should be fine

[real cairn]

Its new and exciting and scary all the same

[chilly kestrel]

True! :D

I'm thinking about it constantly now

I think I want this

[real cairn]

I'm happy for you :3

[chilly kestrel]

https://tenor.com/view/silly-dog-silly-dog-propeller-hat-propeller-hat-dog-gif-4764495627579170054

I'm happy for you too cause you've been finding yourself too :3

And I can learn from others who have done this before me

Just wondering about prices

I'm still doing this all behind my parent's backs, but I may tell mom eventually after I drop enough hints so then she can say "oh yeah I knew already"

...which is why I clicked no insurance

[trail jungle]

I am also happy for you Spriga

That definitely seems exciting

[chilly kestrel]

And hopefully not expensive

Or, as expensive as it could be

[trail jungle]

Soon you’ll be drinking that E

[chilly kestrel]

Just gotta remember after looking at myself in the mirror. It gets better. Probably.

[trail jungle]

It will get better

Trust the other people on E or T

Like Fera, I think

[chilly kestrel]

Trueeeeee

[chilly kestrel]

https://tenor.com/view/kirby-rick-kirby-rick-kirby-susie-susie-gif-11857791706069137736

[trail jungle]

https://youtube.com/shorts/6jKEg7m4NzQ?si=tcfF0SVwEIlJgjqz

Guys I think this might be true

[arctic surge]

If you're not using insurance, they should have a self pay discount, at least at planned parenthood

[spark beacon]

is that ralsei sonic

[trail jungle]

Yes, but that is probably unrelated

[spark beacon]

https://tenor.com/view/deltarune-ch-chapter-ralsei-susie-gif-16941390331905780833

they should’ve made his running animation this

[chilly kestrel]

got called sir again..

:(

[arctic surge]

:((

[chilly kestrel]

long hair is cool (ive had it my whole life)

sometimes it aint enough

oh well LIKE I SAID IT GETS BETTER

https://tenor.com/view/peter-griffin-but-i-want-it-now-gif-26307521

I'll be fine ya know

:3

Just gotta keep posting :3

[arctic surge]

I'm gonna lose my ||FUCKING|| MIND

[chilly kestrel]

TRUE!!!

[trail jungle]

Well Mrs. Spriga, I hope you start to look more like your gender

[chilly kestrel]

Who said that

(I don't, really)

(But thanks ig)

Still new/warming up to this, so obviously I'm not gonna look the part yet. But time will do its thing

Ik its hard to tell cause all i am is words on a screen

[trail jungle]

Yeah

You could also try and style your hair differently or wear different clothes to accommodate the gender

[chilly kestrel]

Too bad i have such a big forehead 🥀

And i'm gonna try to clothes shop soon, i'm willing to work up the courage for it

[trail jungle]

And thats going to stop you because

[prisma roost]

can get a pony

no wait that's not the word un English

uhhh

bangs!

yes, in German the word for bangs is der Pony whereas a small horse (pony) is das Pony

[trail jungle]

I mean owning a pony would be pretty cool and could help

But yeah, bangs should help in that aspect

[real cairn]

Nevermind the mess. I'll scrub them clean later.

But brought out a rare colour for me :3

[restive sinew]

im still super new(again only like 5-6 weeks total on E) but just knowing that you're taking steps to try and make it better and all of the professionals say it will get better has helped me a lot staying committed

[restive sinew]

clothes shopping is a really big thing, it helped me soooo much having fem clothes, I was blessed with a mom that was ok with going with me shopping the first time, hoping that your mom is also accommodating but you can also do it yourself, be sure to experiment, don't just settle on one thing, try out a bunch of different stuff, and keep trying as your body goes through the changes cause some stuff will look weird now but look great later

[chilly kestrel]

Yeah bangs are cool, umm unfortunately my hair is like, physically unable to make bangs work

So

Well. I'm going to the mall on Thursday, and Mom's going along with me (she wanted to go to dave and busters, lol). I was gonna plan on it being a secret clothes shopping day by myself, but...idk if I'm gonna have the courage to actually say something

She already suggested that she could leave after the arcade and I go do stuff on my own, which I could do? But. Idk. I figure Thursday's the best day in the near future to finally say something (I probably won't)

[trail jungle]

Have we thought about buying a pony though

[chilly kestrel]

https://tenor.com/view/peter-griffin-peter-horse-family-guy-lois-griffin-gif-27498457

[trail jungle]

https://tenor.com/view/kiska-sempai-art-animation-cartoon-kemonomimi-gif-6192007916799438457

[spark beacon]

chat I’m so worried because I need to wait until I go to college to decide whether or not to transition and I need time in college to think about it but what if my voice deepens by then and it’s too late

Like I definitely need more time to decide but I don’t know how long I can wait

right now my body is about as good as it can be to transition I already have a lot of the early effects of estrogen but I know that will change at some point and idk when that would be

[spark beacon]

also this

like these could both be me and they are both awesome

(idk who’s art this is)

[dire junco]

You could start puberty blockers until you decide for sure maybe

[spark beacon]

idk if I want to look 5 years younger than I am tho

[dire junco]

I’m not an expert but I don’t think that’s how they work

I don’t think they reverse any changes

[spark beacon]

ok I might do that for like 6 months or a year once I go to college

I guess that the pride center at my school could help me with this

that’s still in like 8 months tho

[restive sinew]

yeah puberty blockers just stop future changes, they don't reverse changes that have happened

[prisma roost]

smh getting made fun of because English is my second language

nah jk

proper prain fart

[prisma roost]

can I have headpats? an idol group I've come to really love is disbanding on Monday and I can't quite cope with it :(

[chilly kestrel]

Morning chat!

https://tenor.com/view/happy-catto-cats-gif-2693509101423175460

[trail jungle]

Good afternoon

[trail jungle]

How is everyone’s day

[chilly kestrel]

[trail jungle]

You know, I have thought about what I am going to do on Valentines day

I am going to get my nails painted in the colors: purple, white, and black. For no specific reason definitely

[real cairn]

Taco Bell and rom coms for me

[trail jungle]

Nice

Rays is probably going to have Taco Bell for dinner on Valentines day too

[chilly kestrel]

I want to be not fat :(

I checked my weight today, I'm 228 for being a little over 6 foot (also too tall for my liking)

But losing it is hard

I've been at this weight range for years

[trail jungle]

I believe that you can lose it

[chilly kestrel]

Working out suuuucks and not eating a lot doesnt help too much

[trail jungle]

You could always just drink and eat healthier

Or find someone or something to motivate you

[quasi pike]

I got a lot of weight to lose too

[trail jungle]

I also believe in you

[trail jungle]

I mean for you, your goal could be to cosplay as meowscarada

[chilly kestrel]

Is it easier or harder to lose weight before or after starting E

[real cairn]

Easier before.

T girls tend to gain weight on E

[chilly kestrel]

Shit

I'm already kind of overweight

Well, I got two and a half months to grind. If I want to.

[chilly kestrel]

.

[trail jungle]

TBF, the weight will be distributed differently so if could be more to your liking

[chilly kestrel]

I dont wanna suddenly be like 250 lol

[trail jungle]

Like in the chest area, if you know what I mean

[chilly kestrel]

https://tenor.com/view/lois-griffin-heartz4mikey-family-guy-skeleton-running-skeleton-gif-10663378571084762037

I lifted some kettlebells for like 5 minutes, it wasnt fun :(

Ah well, eating healthier is a start. I'll give myself one last day to eat bullshit tomorrow cause I'm going to the mall (and calling off work lmao)

[trail jungle]

Plus with E you will also lose muscle which in of itself is weight

So it probably balances itself out

But I am not the E expert so

[trail jungle]

Hey, did you know that you are a cutie

[spark beacon]

anyone ever worry something you say online will get you cancelled someday?

I haven’t done anything wrong but someone might think I did

like what if I somehow get cancelled for using the !lick command

[dire junco]

Not really but I understand being anxious

[spark beacon]

I don’t think I’ve done anything wrong but what if someone else does

[dire junco]

You shouldn’t care what other people think of you cutie

[spark beacon]

I want to be the world’s first trans astronaut so I want to set a positive example

[trail jungle]

Oh, I didn’t know you were interested in space exploration

[spark beacon]

(assuming I change my gender)

[spark beacon]

ya I will be an aerospace engineering major

[dire junco]

That would be so cool O:

[trail jungle]

But honestly I wouldn’t be to worried about it, I mean yeah people make take stuff out of context but you know your intent

[spark beacon]

I’ve never tried to hurt someone, I’ve never intentionally used a slur (not even as a joke irl) and I’ve never even dated someone

[trail jungle]

Exactly

Well I mean not dating someone isn’t bad

That could always change and leave a positive outcome

[spark beacon]

but like most people aren’t familiar with 2020s non-mainstream internet culture

[spark beacon]

ik I hope for it to change

like I want to call people cute and stuff but I don’t usually because im scared that someone someday won’t know that’s common for trans girls and femboys to do

ik that for most people this is not a big deal but if I want to leave a positive impact I worry that I need to be almost perfect

[dire junco]

Queen everyone makes mistakes and if you have even a bit of notoriety people will interpret them for the worse. That doesn’t mean you can’t do great things but there certainly will be people who hate n stuff
-# is any of this even helpful?

[trail jungle]

Its like when you try to open a pull door by pushing

Sure you might look like an idiot for a couple seconds but that doesn’t make you completely stupid

[spark beacon]

this is helpful

I guess toby fox’s first game had the f slur in it and he is still highly popular (as he should be he is great)

not that I think I will ever say a slur that’s not my kind of thing

but I guess it can’t be that easy to get canceled

I think im just overly anxious

I already have a 1/1000 chance of becoming an astronaut if I apply and if I do decide to change my gender that will be even harder I don’t want anything else to lower my odds

[trail jungle]

Don’t worry Dallor

[chilly kestrel]

:3

And I'll be the 194859283749291636th digital artist :3. We are an unoriginal kind

Random thought of the day: hopefully my hair will get better soon. Genuinely, I've already been on minoxidil+finasteride tablets for 1 month and ik that's not a long time, hopefully that and hrt being in my future will help with that. I can't wait to look better :3

Random thought 2: what if my appointment comes but I fumble the many questions they're gonna ask me and I end up not getting the prescription I want. Intrusive thoughts go away

[quasi pike]

:3

[trail jungle]

:3

[spark beacon]

:3

[slow prism]

:3

[restive sinew]

:3

[restive sinew]

if you're just honest with them and talk about the stuff you've talked about in here it'll be like impossible for you to fumble it

[dire junco]

https://cdn.discordapp.com/attachments/1402505168943321108/1471364803644883106/IMG_9027.gif

[quasi pike]

https://cdn.discordapp.com/attachments/1402505168943321108/1471364803644883106/IMG_9027.gif

[trail jungle]

https://cdn.discordapp.com/attachments/1402505168943321108/1471364803644883106/IMG_9027.gif

[arctic surge]

https://cdn.discordapp.com/attachments/1402505168943321108/1471364803644883106/IMG_9027.gif

[prisma roost]

you're taller than me and weigh less than me lol

professional fat fuck checking in

depression has been kicking my butt so hard I couldn't really do much lately

[chilly kestrel]

The curses of being tall

[real cairn]

:3

[chilly kestrel]

Then I get to post the Sprigatito video again

Cause that's my thing

[chilly kestrel]

At the mall with Mom rn wandering around. We got here an hour early on accident so nothings open

Passing by a makeup store
Mom, jokingly, unknowingly: "you should get your makeup done lol"
Me: hmm
Mom: "you'd look so pretty"
Me: "yeah maybe I would"

I have my nails painted rn and I brushed my hair pretty good

So

[chilly kestrel]

Womens clothes are nice, just walking past them

[prisma roost]

in my experience they're infuriating ro shop for

[trail jungle]

How is everyone’s day going

[real cairn]

I had an 18 yo swipe on my dating profile. So... That was cringe

[trail jungle]

That sucks

But you probably dealed with that quickly right?

[real cairn]

[prisma roost]

I'm together with someone who's 16 years older, so jdk if I cab say anything at all lol

[chilly kestrel]

Oh my god mom take a hiiiiint 😭 I don't wanna say it myself

"That's the women's section"
"Haha whoops"

"I wanna look at earrings today" (something ive been saying for six months)

[real cairn]

Are you 30 like me? Lmao

[chilly kestrel]

Thank you Panda, I'm trying to prepare for that opportunity pleaaaaase lift this weight off of me

"I'm excited to go on this journey with you" mom says when she's referring to the earring store

Oh my god you can say it already

She's totally gonna hit me with the

at any point and I'm just waiting

[trail jungle]

I honestly thought you were a bit younger than 30

[chilly kestrel]

"I support any decision you make" holy shitttt just say it

Sorry ive repeated myself enough its just funny atp

[trail jungle]

There might be a small chance that maybe potentially she might know

Crazy idea I know

[chilly kestrel]

Mom was tired and went home so now I'm here by myself to whatever. She noticed I was worried about something

I like being alone but I also don't, it's a dangerous world, ya know. Idk. Motivate me to go buy new clothes or something

Cause that's 90% of why I'm even here

I need to not melt the fuck down it's okay to buy fucking clothes

Fuck my stupid chud life

[prisma roost]

nah

in 20

[real cairn]

Oh dear

[prisma roost]

yknow it always sounds very sus

but it's the best relationship I've ever been in and better than I could've imagined

[chilly kestrel]

I'm going home

I hate myself

[prisma roost]

whys that?

[chilly kestrel]

Having a meltdown wanting to shop for fem clothes at the mall, mom was with me and she left and i was gonna buy some behind her back and i just dont have the courage to and im just a goddamn mess

[trail jungle]

Don’t worry, sometimes things take time

[prisma roost]

ooo yeah I get that

I appear female and I used to mostly get my pants from the mens section and somebody gave me a bombastic side eye

but at the end, nobody really cares and if they really do, they're an asshole and don't deserve any attention in this way anyway

[restive sinew]

it's fine to not have the courage rn, it's really hard solo...I still can't do it personally

[trail jungle]

Online shopping might be an option, but it might not 100% work

[real cairn]

Rome wasn't built in a day.

These things take time 💗

[chilly kestrel]

I'm home whatever

https://tenor.com/view/sprigatito-fuecoco-sleeping-gif-6581678432089642110

[prisma roost]

yeah, happens, it's not always easy, don't beat yourself up over it

[trail jungle]

Press 1 if you would enjoy the repeated motion of someone’s hand pressing on the top of your head, simulated through a emote on Discord

[slow prism]

1

[dire junco]

1

[real cairn]

https://tenor.com/view/lizard-lizard-lizard-button-lizard-tom-the-lizard-pixar-gif-17194109322617058326

[young knoll]

One

[trail jungle]

1

[spark beacon]

1

https://tenor.com/view/red-button-spam-press-button-click-gif-17367381

[chilly kestrel]

Do you think it's worth trying again tomorrow? Mom's going back to return a thing that didn't fit

Or will I just have another panic attack

Maybe it's not worth it rn

I'm a total mess and cause I told her that I freaked out and left I'm like 70% sure mom knows my secret but hasn't said anything

I'm tired

[trail jungle]

If you believe you are ready to, then yeah, but don’t force yourself if you are still uneasy about it

[chilly kestrel]

Idk if I'll ever not be uneasy about it

I'm extremely easy to stress

[trail jungle]

Thats fair, but you could always try and go when you less nervous even if it isn’t 100% gone

[chilly kestrel]

Wonder if taking E boosts confidence lmao

Or if I try to do all this before (like now) then it just doesn't work out

[restive sinew]

in my experience it gets a bit easier each time you try, but if you think it's too early to try again you shouldn't force yourself to

[chilly kestrel]

It'll keep getting better, despite my internal struggling I refuse to cancel that appointment I made

https://tenor.com/view/kirby-kirby-and-the-forgotten-land-sleep-kirby-kirby-sleeping-gif-25356780

[restive sinew]

[chilly kestrel]

Neither of us actually said it so I can't say for sure yet, I may still be in the closet, but I dropped a large number of hints today. Mom was very supportive

It was entirely on me that I didn't do what I wanted

Oh well

[prisma roost]

Good mood today, finally seeing my bf again :3

can't wait to bawl my eyes out again

[trail jungle]

Thats great

[chilly kestrel]

Should I get earrings today
Been thinkin about it for months
Wondering about it

Yehh

I'm not as worried about the piercing itself, moreso the weirdness of the few days after

[chilly kestrel]

Back at the mall. Try try again

Earring store is a bust cause the line's too long. I guess there's a Friday the 13th so I'll look for clothes again

Mom's trying on a dress rn. "Please buy it I can wear it when you're not home"

We were in the bed bath and beyond earlier and mom corraled me to the men's section tho. I want something flowery :(

[trail jungle]

No you must smell like Sharks and Guns

[trail jungle]

Where do you think you would get them

[real cairn]

Have you tried maybe telling your mother directly you are interested in this?

She might not quite be getting the hints.

[prisma roost]

yeah it's difficult sometimes

First happy day for me in two weeks

we are back

[chilly kestrel]

Home again

That was better than yesterday, I got some stuff, but I'm not totally satisfied. I never got a chance to break away and be alone

Didn't get earrings today but I'll probably get em done in a few weeks. Mom bought that dress tho

Guh

I went back into that fragrance store right before we left and Mom tried to throw me into the men's corner again and I deadass audibly just said "No!" and went to the rest of the store and got some rose scented thing

[trail jungle]

Congrats?

[chilly kestrel]

We shall return

...in a few weeks

[spark beacon]

do any of you know a safe to use girl filter?

I imagine a lot of them will save your picture

[dire junco]

A what?

[spark beacon]

like one of those things where you take a picture of yourself and a bot makes you look like the opposite gender

[chilly kestrel]

I remember using the snapchat girl filter when they added that back in like 2018
Hahhhhhhh~

Good times

Only time I ever used snapchat btw

#relatable

[spark beacon]

snapchat’s worked fine

I sure hope I don’t ever look like that tho (it looked like a face filter)

[restive sinew]

same LMAO

[chilly kestrel]

https://tenor.com/view/egg-frank-can-i-offer-you-a-nice-egg-in-this-trying-time-gif-13802522

Mom bought those dresses you know DAMN well what I'm doing next time I'm home alone

[restive sinew]

how close are you in terms of build to your mom?

[chilly kestrel]

uhhhhhhhhhhh

i'm a decent bit taller than her

about 50 pounds heavier (also cause i have like 8 inches on her height. ugh)

[restive sinew]

as a heads up, because 8 inches is quite a bit taller, the dresses will very likely look a bit weird with where the waist is supposed to be if you were to try them on, they have some wiggle room usually on this, but not typically 8 inches worth of it. Personally, I would say that it's still worthwhile to see what you look like in them, but keep in mind that it might be tighter than you expect and it might look a bit strange because of the height difference.

[chilly kestrel]

Yeah for sure. I saw some skirts at hot topic that i really kinda wanted to get but mom was there so i settled on a belt with a star pattern instead. I was holding the feelings in so much 😭

[restive sinew]

hot topic skirts go hard af

[chilly kestrel]

Still says shit like "i support any decision you make" but still wont outright like, say it

And again every time I looked at the womens section she pointed out that this was in fact the womens section and by the 5th time i told her that she doesnt need to keep telling me that

Heh (i bought the purple one today. the pink one i got out of a gacha machine once. it has kirby on it)

[trail jungle]

Nice

Thats definitely a deep purple nail polish

[trail jungle]

Who is ready for the time of Valence or Valentine’s Day

[spark beacon]

thank you burger

I figured out that for me this feeling is caused by caffeine

if I don’t have caffeine every day it’s ok tho

I also can’t have a full coffee’s worth of caffeine in a day

[prisma roost]

I feel bad with or without caffeine so I might as well drink three monsters a day

[chilly kestrel]

Its black, thats the lighting in my room

[trail jungle]

Oh

I suppose you were referring to the bracelet then

[chilly kestrel]

Yeh

[crisp crater]

Tbh I don't either, but usually just say straight although I'm pretty sure I'm ace leaning

[young knoll]

[trail jungle]

Good afternoon everyone

[spark beacon]

my transness charted as a function of time

every day I have rated my gender from 0-10 with 0 being 100% male and 10 being 100% female

highest value is 8

this makes me wonder if I could find the area under my gender

[trail jungle]

Nails have been painted in the colors of the Ace flag

[chilly kestrel]

Shit, I shoulda done that

Also, ik I've been ace for a few years now :3

That still hasn't changed

[chilly kestrel]

Apparently this game's abbreviation is goated

[trail jungle]

MTF 🏳️‍⚧️

[chilly kestrel]

waow,,,

[dire junco]

[real cairn]

[slow prism]

Close enough

[spark beacon]

I just bought eyeliner for the first time

[chilly kestrel]

How do you get the courage to do that 😔

[spark beacon]

I was by myself

[chilly kestrel]

Ah, classic

I'll get there soon too >:3

I thought about getting some light makeup like some concealer or foundation and wearing only that in public. Just a bit subtle for now

But I still haven't had the courage to do it. The store I work at has a cosmetic section with makeup I've looked at before but I don't wanna buy any of the stuff at work cause that would be obvious

[trail jungle]

Would anyone like some headpats for Valentine’s Day

[magic condor]

mreow!!

w<

[spark beacon]

https://tenor.com/view/yes-gif-26071495

[trail jungle]

I would also like to make a request in headpats for Valentine’s Day

Well I guess technically it is the day after Valentine’s Day, but whatever

[chilly kestrel]

75 days to go chat :3

[chilly kestrel]

Back going to work again today but, nail polish, bracelets, new belt (the star pattern one, forgot to take a pic) and i sprayed that rose thing one time, damn that shits kinda strong. Maybe i'll know how to use it better next time

:3333333

I feel like my face is still kind of boy-looking, but only so much you can do at this stage

[chilly kestrel]

Saw some kind of transphobic comments on twitter getting a very concerningly large number of likes and its making me kinda worry about actually going through with all this. (And i would worry about looking ugly cause thats a good reason for all the hate i saw)

I can still turn back now (or not)

(i kinda dont want to but i also want to be safe)

[trail jungle]

Spriga, do what is best for you, not what best for the people

[chilly kestrel]

Yeah, too bad some internet spaces are complete shitholes

[real cairn]

You can avoid those internet spaces

[chilly kestrel]

What if they appear on my twitter

Idk nvm, maybe since I've started finding myself out the world has started feeling a bit less safe. Maybe thats just me

[real cairn]

No one is forcing you to have a twitter

Trust me

[chilly kestrel]

its a good timewaster

[real cairn]

The world feels safer when you can be your real self

[chilly kestrel]

Maybe yeah, I got called the wrong thing again like ten minutes after that first message and I keep thinking yeah it would be cool to be a girl huh
I just dont want to end up being an ugly one that everyone makes fun of, or something

[real cairn]

Girl you're always going to be gorgeous

[restive sinew]

if you think it will make you happier to do it, you should do it. There is the unfortunate reality of the current US government, and some others, being incredibly anti trans(trans people just not being allowed in the military, forcing people to have their AGAB on their passports instead of their chosen one)

[chilly kestrel]

Even if I don't feel like one yet

[restive sinew]

also this is v true :3

[chilly kestrel]

Its nice but at the same time it still doesnt quite feel right yet. (But thats getting a bit closer every day)

Idk today didnt feel right. I felt awkward about my appearance again

[real cairn]

Either way its your journey and we're here to support you through it. No matter what :3

[chilly kestrel]

Trueeeee i love this chat

I tried on that rose scented spray today, that shit is STRONG
One single spray and i was still smelling it like 8 hours later

Anyways, I wonder if all that weird mental shit will go away when I get to start on E
I hear it clears up a lot on that first day

[trail jungle]

It probably will, can’t speak from experience, but trust me

Also out of curiosity what characters from media do you all gave you gender envy before

[chilly kestrel]

yes :)

[trail jungle]

Thats not very descriptive, any specifics

[quasi pike]

:3

[spark beacon]

one of my not-friends-anymore just spread a ton of rumors about me doing bad stuff

[restive sinew]

oh

why are people like that

[chilly kestrel]

thats not very good

[prisma roost]

I've noticed I can't be separated from.my bf or ill be sad

just completely dependent

[trail jungle]

That sucks, is there any specific things that person said you did, if you are ok with sharing

[trail jungle]

You might have a separation anxiety issue or something similar

[prisma roost]

it used to not be that bad

[prisma roost]

I've always enjoyed spending time with him, even when we were just friends, but I've been feeling awful, but suddenly fine when I was with my bf, feels kinda frustrating?

[spark beacon]

said that I did some inappropriate stuff that I didn’t do

[trail jungle]

Yeah that definitely sucks, hopefully you can get that resolved

[chilly kestrel]

Best chat in the whole server, fr

I wonder if I should boost my appointment up a few weeks while I'm still able to do that. I'm tempted but it's also fine to wait it out...been thinking about it but idk

I'd probably have to request the date change but I just see it's an option 👉 👈

[restive sinew]

if it doesn't cost anything to get it to be earlier, I don't see why changing it would be an issue uwu

besides actually getting on the phone

[chilly kestrel]

Ive been doing it all online

Idk, feels like i want to speed it up a little so that i can actually "earn" those pronouns but at the same time its good to do everything i need to do before i start

Ive been wanting to switch to she/they on the rest of my socials but i know i still dont look like that would fit me, like i have to earn the right or something

[trail jungle]

Ah yes, you have to earn the pronouns, like the seven Chaos Emeralds

[chilly kestrel]

Well I don't knowwwww

[trail jungle]

If you collect all seven pronouns you turn into Super Spriga

“He, him, she, her, they, them, and other”

https://tenor.com/view/sonic-frontiers-super-sonic-super-sonic-frontiers-chaos-emeralds-ssj-sonic-gif-26994694

[chilly kestrel]

I just wanna change em everywhere but also feel good about it :(

I still want it to feel right

[trail jungle]

Yeah, I understand that

You wouldn’t want people to think you’re a fraud or something

Just change them whenever you feel like you are comfortable enough to do so

Besides we know you aren’t faking anything, we trust you

[chilly kestrel]

:D?

Yeah me and my already scheduled appointment going brrrr
And all the other stuff I've said

Imagine that, a pre-hrt person not passing. It fuckin happens
I do feel like every time I look in the mirror I feel a bit better about myself. Too bad my forehead is big and I still have a mustache shadow and oh my head is shaped weird and-

Whatev. Still probably getting earrings in a few weeks (I want makeup too lowkey)

[trail jungle]

I don’t think forehead sizes have anything to do with this but alright

Also where do you plan on getting your earrings

[chilly kestrel]

Professional place at the mall (specifying professional cause some mall places suck)

[trail jungle]

I meant what part of the ear were you going to get stabbed with a needle for the earring

[chilly kestrel]

Oh, the bottom part

Lobe i think

[trail jungle]

Cool

Me personally I wouldn’t really want earrings, but just curious on what other people do with them

[chilly kestrel]

If theyre a more feminine thing, then

[trail jungle]

You would want to get them?

I mean, its not that I don’t want earrings because they are more associated with femininity, I just don’t care for them. Its the same way with tattoos

[chilly kestrel]

Yeh, and im not looking into getting any of those anyways

And thats okay

[trail jungle]

But Tattoos usually look good on other people, my parents have a lot of tattoos, and Fera also has a couple and they look good on her

[chilly kestrel]

My mom has a lot. (Probably too many)

You can look good with em but you can also look good without :3

[quasi pike]

[chilly kestrel]

A good idea I saw a while back was taking pics of yourself during the process, so that you can look back and see all the progress you made
I took a pic of myself a few days ago that I kinda like, (and ik I'll look even better as the months go on)
Maybe I wanna share it if I scribble out my face or something

[trail jungle]

Oh god, taking pictures of yourself, that is pretty scary

[restive sinew]

ive been tempted to do this, but I dislike how I look so much already I don't want to see myself like this again

[quasi pike]

[restive sinew]

it's part of the reason why I have makeup, but still don't use it as often as I should

[real cairn]

I found a pic of myself from 10 years ago and I don't even look like the same person lmao

[chilly kestrel]

Yeah I'm getting used to it

I have pics of myself from 10 years ago

Genuinely I looked super feminine at age 11-12

My hair was so goooood. Now its not as good but i'm working on improving it!

[restive sinew]

there definitely are pictures of me from before I started to transition, I just don't have them personally

my hair is something im super thankful for, I have like cheater hair

[quasi pike]

[real cairn]

I've had so much new growth hair on E its insane.

I found a whole new patch just last night

[restive sinew]

[trail jungle]

[chilly kestrel]

I need E

Wait, forgot to do my daily countdown

74 days to go

🎉

Imagine me already being on finasteride+starting HRT
Imagine how much better my hairs gonna look a year from now

[trail jungle]

What is finasteride

[chilly kestrel]

Hair regrowing stuff, ive been taking a chewy tablet every morning

Oh yeah theres minoxidil in there too (another hair regrowing thing)

[trail jungle]

That makes sense

Do you think you will ever dye your hair in the future

[restive sinew]

I really want to dye my hair, but it takes a really long time to grow out, so im thinking of just getting highlights instead of full dying, cause I like the length I have

[chilly kestrel]

Um, I want to lowkey, maybe eventually

Since its temporary

I haven't yet, but not opposed to the idea

[chilly kestrel]

Alright anyways here I wanted to do this but I scribbled out my face for like, safety ig
Left pic is 2017, back when I was in middle school, right pic is 2026
My hair's not quite as nice as it used to be but it's still good and I'm hoping it'll get better as I start working towards these new goals :D

Uh, as you can see I've never been super masculine lmao

And before you ask I forgot what the trophy was for. Probably band class, cause I used to do that. Don't think I got to take it home.

[real cairn]

Ooh

Comparison pics time!

[chilly kestrel]

Holy shit, glowup

I wonder what I'll look like 10 years from now

[slow prism]

What a huge transformation

[chilly kestrel]

I can't wait for mine to start (unless it already has)
I need this positivity in my life

https://tenor.com/view/dog-dog-with-butterfly-on-nose-dog-with-butterfly-butterfly-gif-13282441872748349107

[trail jungle]

More like a transfemation

[trail jungle]

The image on the right kinda looks like Justin Beaver

[chilly kestrel]

Hrt can save me

[trail jungle]

I mean from the photos you don’t necessarily look super masculine, granted you can’t see the face

[real cairn]

LMAO!

I've been called that

Harry Styles too.

[trail jungle]

Not surprised

Actually I have been said I looked like Justin Beaber by a friend of mine

[chilly kestrel]

:D

Can't wait to start

[trail jungle]

Wait May 1st is on a Friday, that doesn’t have a E in it

[chilly kestrel]

Well it will now

:3

[quasi pike]

wish I had hair like that

[trail jungle]

I thought you were obtaining the E not Friday

[trail jungle]

I wish I had hair, just kidding I have hair

[chilly kestrel]

Well idk how it works

(It's already long but I want my hair to be even longer :3)

[trail jungle]

I am not Bald like Raysfire

[trail jungle]

How long would you want it to be

[real cairn]

Rawr XD

[chilly kestrel]

True

[chilly kestrel]

Idk, longer ig

[trail jungle]

Agreed

I didn’t know if you had a general idea like down to your chest or something

[quasi pike]

longer :3

[trail jungle]

Down to your stomach?

[quasi pike]

[dire junco]

My hair use to go down to my butt, however it kinda sucked to take care of

[trail jungle]

Honestly I want that for myself too

[trail jungle]

Yeah thats fair, toilets would also probably be an issue

[restive sinew]

mine is about this length rn uwu

[quasi pike]

[trail jungle]

Thats awesome

[restive sinew]

Im not late you guys were early :3

(totally not like 2 weeks later)

[chilly kestrel]

I want that (actually, do i? idk now)

My hair wont go any longer than it currently is (a bit past my shoulder)

[crisp crater]

i just pull it back and put it over my shoulder

[restive sinew]

really long hair is a bit of a pain to take care of, but it's worth it if you like the length

[chilly kestrel]

I seriously seriously hope the hair tablets i've been on+hrt soon will help getting me even longer hair than it already is

[crisp crater]

honestly the long hair is more of an issue at work

(for me anyway)

[chilly kestrel]

https://tenor.com/view/silly-dog-silly-dog-propeller-hat-propeller-hat-dog-gif-4764495627579170054

[spark beacon]

here is the fbi 3ds qr code for pokemon firered

not sure why I have this on my camera roll or why I felt the need to post it here

[restive sinew]

the fbi qr code?

[quasi pike]

[prisma roost]

I am incredibly tired, saw tattoos and that was my neuron activation moment
one of them is in the process of healing and my ass is sitting here thinking about getting another one as soon as I can

[prisma roost]

it's usually to download software over the fbi menu on modded 3ds systems

[trail jungle]

Your fingers are long

God imagine flipping someone off with that middle fingers

[restive sinew]

Are they?

My hands are super tiny

[trail jungle]

I mean they look long to me

Maybe the hand is small and the fingers are long

[trail jungle]

How is everyone doing today

[chilly kestrel]

Clicked the silly buttons on the website and I moved my appointment up from May 1st to April 10th. Weeeeeeeeee I just really wanna start it sooner rather than later cause I know the changes start super gradual so it's not that big of a deal, BUT I'll feel better about it sooner

So, 52 days to go now. Sorry chat, I skipped 67

Week after the Galaxy movie, week before Tomodachi Life, shit's gonna be stacked and y'all best believe it's gonna be great

I don't think I even had to confirm anything, like just a couple clicks and yep okay there you go now (one of the things on the price estimate still has the old date, buf maybe it'll update lol)

It goes through, right :D

[trail jungle]

Congrats

Although April 10th is still on a Friday which doesn’t have the letter E in it so

[chilly kestrel]

Yeah I wanted it to be on a Friday

Its the one day of the week I'm off but both my parents work

[trail jungle]

You know, that makes sense

But that whole month will be a lot of events happening for you

[chilly kestrel]

The 17th is also Mom's birthday

[trail jungle]

Nice

A couple of my friends’s birthdays are in April

Joose’s birthday is also in April

[trail jungle]

Did anyone do anything fun today

[real cairn]

Gonna be warm tomorrow.

Haven't worn this shirt in probably 8-9 years now.

I'm going to slay

[trail jungle]

You are going to slay, with this knife

:3

[real cairn]

:3

[magic condor]

:33

[dire junco]

:3 :3

[chilly kestrel]

Will it still fit?

[chilly kestrel]

Work, and everything else I've mentioned here

[real cairn]

Yeah. Probably be big on me

I other random news I was proposed to lmao

[trail jungle]

Is that good

[real cairn]

[trail jungle]

How do you not know

I feel like you should know

[restive sinew]

that's usually good

[prisma roost]

we went to eat at a restaurant with my bf and his colleague

[prisma roost]

it looks like one of the Graffitti taken straight from the Berlin Wall lol

[real cairn]

It is 😹

[trail jungle]

I just wanted to make sure

[real cairn]

Oh I meant about the wall lmao

[trail jungle]

I wanted to make sure the Graffiti was from the Berlin Wall then

I can change my answer no one would notice

[crisp crater]

Same my hands are small but I have long fingers... Toes too, I always say they can almost be fingers

[trail jungle]

How is everyone doing today

[crisp crater]

Eepy

[slow prism]

Relatable the eepiness consumes me

[real cairn]

Complicated

[dire junco]

I am doing amazing :3

[trail jungle]

Thats good

[trail jungle]

Oh, thats well I mean complicated

@dire junco is there a reason to your feelings of amazingness

[dire junco]

My girlfriend is being adorable

[trail jungle]

Oh, when did you obtain a girlfriend

[chilly kestrel]

waow

[trail jungle]

Don’t question why I compared your girlfriend to a obtainable item like in Zelda

[dire junco]

A little over a week ago :3

[trail jungle]

Honestly, hell yeah

Just in time for Valentine’s Day too

[trail jungle]

Where is that even from

[arctic surge]

i think its from runescape

[real cairn]

So my date tomorrow is trans

And holy FUCKING SHIT my mind has been blown in the best possible ways

Today is way too dank lmao

[quasi pike]

[trail jungle]

[trail jungle]

Trans in which form?

But either way that is awesome

[real cairn]

Human

[quasi pike]

[trail jungle]

You know what I meant

Like are they a MTF or a FTM

I mean you don’t have to tell me if you don’t want to, not trying to pry or anything

[chilly kestrel]

Transformers
Robots in disguise

[restive sinew]

I thought transformers were those things that explode in movies when a car runs into them

[chilly kestrel]

How does one get dates (in a platonic way, I want platonic friends)

[real cairn]

Lots of dating apps have "friends" mode or the like.

Specifically for finding friends.

[chilly kestrel]

https://tenor.com/view/drake-yachty-censored-not-drake-tech-support-gif-8658410013845332703

Imagine using apps lmao

I should try to actually pursue that stuff (proceeds to not do that at all)

[arctic surge]

ive tried but it all just feels so fake/forced. idk not my vibe i feel

[chilly kestrel]

[real cairn]

Bars are always good places.

I've been around the world and found bars for all types of people.

[trail jungle]

I think you can buy dates at the grocery store

[prisma roost]

I used a band server for a Japanese all woman band

rather indirectly

not with the intention of dating

but it somehow happened

[trail jungle]

:3

[real cairn]

:3

[prisma roost]

:3

[arctic surge]

:3c

[prisma roost]

[restive sinew]

:3

[chilly kestrel]

50 days to go until my new appointment time that I set in! :D
Although I do still kinda wonder about going in with no insurance. Idk

Also I guess blood clots are a thing to worry about? My mom's had some history with those :/

At least I don't smoke and I very rarely drink. Like, one drink every few months

[arctic surge]

It comes with an increased risk but I don't think it's a huge one, just kinda, know what to look for, yk?

[chilly kestrel]

Yeah just kinda spontaneously thought of it again

[deft tapir]

:3

[slow prism]

:3

[spark beacon]

I’m really happy for arti and fera!! I didn’t check discord last night for some reason

[real cairn]

What I do?