any autistic people up in here

[idle elm]

Ask them to change it gradually /sug
So like change one thing per day or swap the position of two things per day

Espresso ↩️

[Reply to:](#1176007949034995753 message) My parents wanna change the layout of the lounge and dining room completely and get rid of the couch…

[mellow sphinx]

Is there any jobs for a 14-15 year old with autism? I can’t work in this cafe much longer it’s very draining

[gusty sapphire]

Im lucky enough to work in my theatre at school. I clean (sweep, mop, vacuum) and take out the bins, check lights and sound systems, I fix any small amounts of damage or any adjustments needed on the sound or lighting systems, i run both the sound and lighting systems when needed, i do a lot of backstage work, i build and paint set and props for productions and drama classes. The money flucuates, sometimes i dont get any payment sometimes i can get 60-70 bucks for an afternoon of work (largely because of my experience level and age, on top of all of my responsibilities, knowledge and skills). Another small bonus is that i have keys to that whole building (meaning i technically have one of the 6 master sets of keys, I only get to take one key home of which lets me get the other keys which are labelled for me)

[visual brook]

Ooo I'll try thanks!! :]

[mellow sphinx]

That sounds like a great job

[gusty sapphire]

Yeah, lets me help out, get some money every so often and do one of my special interests in a way that I want

[meager vine]

nice 👍

i don't have a theatre at school sadly i wish i did it would be so cool 😭

[mellow sphinx]

I actually do a LOT of theater, I’m usually at the studio at least once a week but it’s summer rn so I’m trying to avoid it because it’s really hot in there because we don’t have air conditioning. The best way for me to get some work there is to take a drama class for younger kids but all of the open classes already have teachers.

[meager vine]

what is it like in theatre

[mellow sphinx]

It’s really fun, most of the time we play drama games and sing songs. And we do a musical every year! The good thing with my local theatre is that it’s mostly neurodivergent or lgbtq kids and teens so it’s quite friendly

[meager vine]

that's nice

[hoary wind]

that sounds so fun, thats what i do for my school in spare time lol

[modest patrol]

I love tutoring, especially young kids. I feel like that can either be a yes or definitely not for autistic people. I know there’s also a lot of autistic people who have a strong connection to animals, so working in a shelter/farm/… could work?

[narrow granite]

omg just got the loop switch 2s under warranty bc my switch 1s broke - THEY ARE AMAZING!!!! /vpos

[brazen stone]

Currently i work with kids at a sailing club, so i coach them and leep them entertained and stuff, its jot too vad and i gave become very over stimulated which led to a near meltdown but my coach and i now have a thing where i can say i need to use the bathroom or neef a drink and i can walk off and have a break,
Im also getting another job soon and applying ti a bunch if places near me- a couple restraunts and some other places but im hoping ill get hired by the bookstore or the cinema because those will be the least overstimulating

[meager vine]

I'm thinking of working at my local supermarket but i don't like interacting much so I'm kind of thinking as stocking the shelves instead of checkout

[flint widget]

Could you use ear defenders while working?

[mellow sphinx]

I can’t, not even earbuds because I have my hair tied up and I’m worried that people will think that I’m not listening to them or I’m a bad employee. I wish I could

[hoary wind]

yayy, sailing, i sail too!!

[idle elm]

idk if this would work but if they talk to you you could say smt back to them in relation to what they said so that they know u are listening

the4kato ↩️

[Reply to:](#1176007949034995753 message) I can’t, not even earbuds because I have my hair tied up and I’m worried that people will think that…

[brazen stone]

Ooh cool

[hoary wind]

yep, do you sail, if so, what boat?

[brazen stone]

Laser 4.7 (ilca 4)

Wby

[hoary wind]

i sail ilca 6!!!

and sometimes a 7 if theres little wind

[brazen stone]

Ooh cool

I have two friends who sail 6s

[hoary wind]

and funnily enough, a 4.7 if its really windy lol

[brazen stone]

Yea

The tupe of boat is handy like that

[hoary wind]

definetly, i have a friend that races nationally for the ilca class

hes also an international para sailor

[brazen stone]

At states last year (i didnt go i was busy with other stuff) my friends told me alot of 6s and 7s moved down cause the winds were like 30(not sure knots or kilometers)

[brazen stone]

Thats cool

My friend just competed in nationals

[hoary wind]

nice

[brazen stone]

His mum said he was probably tge only one not wearing shoes and wearing gardening gloves for gloves

[hoary wind]

yeah, thats crazy, less power is king there though

[brazen stone]

Yea

[hoary wind]

fr lol, i got a new race watch for xmas

[brazen stone]

They were sailing in our local bay and it can get pretty windy in certain areas

[brazen stone]

Ooh cool

[hoary wind]

yep

[brazen stone]

Currently im sailinv wigtout gloves or shoes cause ive lost my gloves and while i wear my shoes while coaching due to insurance sailing with shoes kinda sucks so i dont

[hoary wind]

yeah, ive got a pair of 5mm GUL wetsuit boots

[brazen stone]

Dang

Mine are just from anaconda

And their practically dead

[hoary wind]

fairs, i got these bc i wore out like 3 pairs of water shoes

[brazen stone]

Ahh yea thats fair

[hoary wind]

dy mind me asking, where in teh world u from, us, uk etc?

[brazen stone]

Australia

[hoary wind]

nice

whos your governing body for sailing?

[brazen stone]

Its interesting tho, cause I believe our nationals are called the oceana nationals but its rarely held outside of australia

[brazen stone]

Australian sailing

[hoary wind]

fair enough

[hoary wind]

fairs, im in the uk, so its the RYA

[brazen stone]

Cool

[hoary wind]

ive got my powerboat endorsement as well

[brazen stone]

Endorsement? Like liscsnce?

[hoary wind]

yep

[brazen stone]

Cool

[hoary wind]

now the only thing is where did i put my wallet...

lol

[brazen stone]

I have to wait about 5 more months to be able to get mine

[hoary wind]

yeah, i can go upto 3 miles off shore with it, u got to be 16 or 18?

[brazen stone]

Cause they moved the ahe up 😭

16

It used it ve 15

[hoary wind]

fair enough

i did it at 15 under special perms from the CI

[brazen stone]

But under 6horse power (it might be 10) you can drive without a liscence here

[brazen stone]

Cool

I also live on a boat and it is moored opposite our club so its super handy

[hoary wind]

thats cool

thats cool, living on a boat must be intersting at times

[brazen stone]

The only time i didnt live on one was when i was 4-5 for a year and i dont remeber it so its the only way i know, but recently i definitly notice that i have habits that other people dont

[hoary wind]

fair enough, do you mind me asking what kind of habits?

[hoary wind]

actually, do you mind if i dm you, so we dont block up this thread?

[brazen stone]

Sure

[mellow sphinx]

My dad and brother sail, I tried it once but I hated it

[meager vine]

I've never tried

[hoary wind]

im incredibly biased here, but everyone should try it once if they can

[limpid talon]

GG @hoary wind, you just advanced to level 4!

[meager vine]

i need to look for some place to go first i want to try

[hoary wind]

fair enough, thats good

[meager vine]

👍

[idle elm]

Valid

GrumpyBrick7050 - M7HNN ↩️

[Reply to:](#1176007949034995753 message) im incredibly biased here, but everyone should try it once if they can

[brazen stone]

\goddam proxy

[hoary wind]

indeed

[hoary wind]

lol

[tacit whale]

I had my autism consultation on Monday and the psychiatrist says she thinks I have autism and adhd, so she has booked me for a screening for both next Monday 😁😁 so happy icll

(My dad messaged my mum when he found out and said I wouldn’t have any trouble if I just tried harder at school, ‘head down ass up’ apparently)

Me when my dad doesn’t believe in autism

[idle elm]

Even if they don't believe it remember the diagnoses you may get especially if its right and not the wrong one doesn't lie at all so yeah that is proof enough even if your dad keeps denying it

[young fossil]

The sims updating 💔

[idle elm]

What about it mine updated recently was it bad

[young fossil]

It looks cool, it does. The change not so much thank you /j

[round field]

I got diagnosed with autism a few days ago, hi!

[young fossil]

How do you feel? /lh

[round field]

I feel really really relieved because ive known for years

[gusty sapphire]

Congrats

[limpid talon]

GG @gusty sapphire, you just advanced to level 6!

[buoyant pecan]

same same :0

i feel nothing at the moment

cause i've known for so long

or maybe it's just the alexithymia lol

[round field]

Thats so real

[round field]

Thanks!

[leaden junco]

hello

[mellow sphinx]

Hi

[meager vine]

hi

[vagrant temple]

Hi

[meager vine]

how u all

[vagrant temple]

I’m good, burnt out but good

[meager vine]

I'm eating breakfast

I'm on holiday rn so I'm going back home today

[mellow sphinx]

I hope you enjoyed your holiday, I’m trying to get the motivation to get out of bed and draw

[gusty sapphire]

Hello 🫣

[leaden junco]

i am feeling so burnt out recently

[rose plaza]

I feel that

[stuck apex]

Same, I've been in and out of autistic burnout for ages

[silent iron]

I hope you feel better soon

[young fossil]

I got diagnosed with GAD (generalized anxiety disorder) a couple of days ago. A therapist (different from the one diagnosing me) said that GAD presents differently in neurodivergent people. Does anyone here has GAD and autism and wants to share what’s it like?

For me it’s having a constant high anxiety level that never seems to spike like therapist says it’s supposed to.

[brazen stone]

I have GAD and am autistic

For me it feels like their really heavily intertwined, like im not sure how to word this but like i will over over over tjink and and get super high anxiety over something and then instead of me having a panic attack (used to think they were panic attacks even when not realtef to anxiety) i might start ti have a meltdown cause ive overstimulated myself so much,
Or i might have like idk a plush toy to help with anxiety in large spaces or smth, but then that kinda backfires and im like what if what if what if,
Idk im not exactly sure how to describe it but they are heavilu intertwined for me, im not sure if i have like a constant high anxiety level but i do feel as tho i experiance anxiety on a daily basis for the most simple things

[stuck apex]

I don't have a GAD diagnosis (technically I don't even have an autism diagnosis, but I'm very sure about me being autistic, I haven't done as much research into GAD compared to being autistic)
But I also have phases where I have constant high anxiety levels for months

[inland solar]

im undiagnosed autistic (i highly believe im autistic) but i have been diagnosed with anxiety though the specifics weren't specified but i do believe i have general anxiety disorder and social anxiety
i think that (in this case, if i am actually autistic) they are connected a lot for me
like for example im already not good at talking to new people and the anxiety makes it worse

[meager vine]

me too my parents just say that I'm very different to my friends and keep comparing me

[young fossil]

Thanks for sharing! I haven’t thought of that autism can make the reactions to anxiety different. For me I think I shut down when the anxiety becomes to much.

[idle elm]

Anxiety definitely increases our overstimulation cause it’s extra thoughts and the feeling of people watching you is worse

[buoyant pecan]

a lot of my anxiety is school and stuff

and relationships

i get really anxious when i don't get work done

and i'm scared people are mad at me or something

[stuck apex]

I think another way my autism and anxiety interact is that sometimes I'll get anxiety about future situations being too much for me bc I'm autistic. So I might get anxious that (CW anxious thought) ||maybe I won't be prepared enough or forget something or a plan changes and then I'd get overstimulated and stressed out||

[idle elm]

Yeah, definitely

[leaden junco]

Today i dropped my ear defenders in my local swimming pool 😞

[rose plaza]

Oh no, were they salvageable?

[flint widget]

Uh oh that’s not good

[brazen stone]

I am really really struggling with school, there is alot of stuff going on outside of school as well but i also feel very very jus tlike i feel like even if those things didnt exist i still would be reslly struggling with overwhelm and overstimulation, does anyone have any ideas or tips? Just to get through each day of school without crying at least?

[crisp bough]

Im Autistic Hope Evreyone is doing well!!

[meager vine]

hi

[crisp bough]

Hey

[meager vine]

how u

[crisp bough]

Im good how about you

[meager vine]

u can pick roles

[meager vine]

making music

[crisp bough]

oh yeah

[mellow sphinx]

Ask to work outside or in a quieter room, engage in a calming activity or special interest when possible and tell someone how you’re feeling so they can help you if you need, listen to music, carry fidgets

[crisp bough]

Thats What I do

[mellow sphinx]

Same

[heady valve]

I scored a 176 on my raads test last night💀

[tawny marsh]

Hey guys so my friend is autistic and I wanted to bring her to the local big shopping centre, I was wondering how will I make it least stressful for her

There is a sensory room in the mall

[brazen stone]

Make sure she brings headphones and music, make sure she brings fidget

[cunning dragon]

Maybe also try to go at a time it’s less busy

[tawny marsh]

Thanks

[cunning dragon]

Oh! And make sure you check in occasionally and have a general idea of a quiet place to go to

[leaden junco]

I have finally bought headphones after 13 years of struggle and i am stimming like crazy over the noise cancelling.

[brazen stone]

Yessssssss

Noise cancelling

[leaden junco]

it is so good

[rose plaza]

It's so nice of you to consider her and ask here ^-^
I definitely also recommend headphones or earplugs and stim toys
It's great that there's a sensory room! Maybe make a signal so you know she needs a break in case she gets overstimulated
And generally ask her what she's comfortable with and be open and nice about breaks and accommodations :3

[brazen stone]

I love aurora

[heady valve]

Omg the singer???

I love her songs

[vagrant temple]

Omg I love Aurora so much

I’m making a bust of her for my art project 😃

[heady valve]

What are your biggest safe food? Mine is almost aby kind of chicken as long as it's not flavorless
or if it's going to be boiled, it's because the chicken will be incorporated into something

Fried chicken is superior tho

[mellow sphinx]

Mine are chips

[meager vine]

guacamole 🥑

[idle elm]

Love the autistic hyperfixation of watching hetalia to feel good

[stuck apex]

Instant oatmeal if it's not too sweet

And recently surprisingly Kimchi (usually my safe foods are quite bland but I just really like the Kimchi they sell at the Asian supermarket in my city)

[heady valve]

Oo

I tried kimchi

Unfortunately my taste buds rejected it hard

But I love hearing the crunch on asmrs

[rose plaza]

Potatoes in all way, shapes and forms (except what we call Knödel in Germany)

[heady valve]

Potatoes are awesome

[rose plaza]

What is hetalia?

[stuck apex]

Knödel are too sticky, I agree

But like fried potatoes or mashed potatoes or potato casserole (is that the right word?) are really nice

[inland solar]

I agree so much I love potatoes

[rose plaza]

Potatoe casserole? What's that?

[brazen stone]

I love perogies(a ukrainian/polish/russian kinda like potato dumpling)

[meager vine]

me too

[stuck apex]

Patato slices in a casserole dish with some sauce and cheese on top

I thino the actual word is gratin

[meager vine]

yea i like making it it always tastes good

[idle elm]

Host favorite anime that in the late 2000's was super super popular

Emma ↩️

[Reply to:](#1176007949034995753 message) What is hetalia?

I have fragments of my origin that I am from that show but the truama behind why I was created from it is not well known to me other then during truama times this show was our host identity exstream comfort show and still is to this day

[rose plaza]

AH, YES, I love that so much, very yummy

[rose plaza]

Ah, cool! Do you know what it is about?

[brazen stone]

Whats yalls fav fidget

Mine is a marble and mesh

And beaded lizard or octopus i have

Prefer marble and mesh tho

[stuck apex]

Mine are infinity cubes, marble mazes/fidgets (but only fabric ones, I don't like how the mesh ones feel) and acupressure rings.

[brazen stone]

Oh i also like my tangle and i used to have a gootubz but it broke

[idle elm]

Personifications of nations, world history, world events and fun antics with nations, each season is diffrent, there is no set plot and its very funny. Please recommendation read the welcoming, Manga or watch the anime before going into the Fandom. It had a bad time in its Fandom but our host identity stays out of the bad parts and enjoys the rest, like the cosplayers, the funny videos, the anime, the Manga which has season 7 still ongoing, the videogames, the merch, the music videos because this anime has tons and tons of character songs and they even have 6 plays in Japan that are not based on the Manga welcoming or anime but are still hetalia with characters from it and the seventh musical called a tender world comes to Japan soon, it's based on us 5 nordics and some axis powers played by their Japanese actors , the red one is England, the one in green is America, the third one is Italy, the fourth one is China, on the bottom is us nordics, the one in white is Iceland, the one in dark blue is his big brother Norway, the middle one is Denmark the 4th one is Sweden and the last one is me Finland

Emma ↩️

[Reply to:](#1176007949034995753 message) Ah, cool! Do you know what it is about?

Owe and we have learned real world history from it and were told our host identity and many others back in the day at their high school passed world history due to this anime really helped them learn in a light hearted fun way

[inland solar]

Anyone know any good lego sets around 30 dollars or less? Or alternative brands that aren't cheap quality? Obsessed with lego and I have a chance to buy a set rn I just need one that sells in Amazon
Thanks :D

[rose plaza]

That's so cool!

[tawny marsh]

Maybe try a camera. I like the old 3in1

[young vessel]

Try some of the flower builds, not only are they "complex" but they're nice for displays.

[flint widget]

I have them on my counter and they look really nice as display things but I will say that some of them are repetitive which i didn’t enjoy too much

[meager vine]

oh i should get some /pos

[brazen stone]

This is my fav brand of sunscreen, the orange version is like the blue version cept thinner- i use that one when im just going out and stuff and the blue one has zinc in it so its thicker and i use that when im in saltwater, goinv to the beach, ect, its not oily at all and i really like it, also even tho its only 90ml it lasts for ages

Its like zinc and sunscreen except without the icky so not sesory issye

[heady valve]

Oo

[placid urchin]

Non-greasy sounds fantastic! I know that sunscreen and lotion and stuff are good for my skin but they just feel so icky sometimes

[brazen stone]

Yea

[young vessel]

the sticky skin after application 🤢 💀 🙏 😭

[idle elm]

When you find materials for one of your special interests and start to color code them to re fill your container

[iron fog]

it seems like you having a blast

[idle elm]

Owe I am. I don't have much string but found just enough that I am making a candy latter stitch braclet with black and green beeds 😊

[idle elm]

Didn't have any stretch string so using this as a test braclet till I get stretch string. But this was easy. I tried with paracord but I didn't have enough so had to use regular string till I get stretch cord. Will be redoing this one day when I have money for the string. But it was fun and I like the colors I chose. Now I need a food and water break got to hyperfocused with this for hours especially since I wanted to do green and black but didn't have enough green beeds lol

[dusk crypt]

Greetings

[cunning dragon]

We love kandi!!

[idle elm]

That looks great

[dusk crypt]

Sharks!

:3

[stuck apex]

Oohh the shark is so cool!

[dusk crypt]

i love sharkies so thats really. cool

[silent iron]

That looks cool

[vagrant temple]

Omg I love kandi too

[placid urchin]

Does anyone have any noise cancelling earbud recommendations? I love my headphones but I think sometimes I need something smaller. I've heard that Loop earbuds are good but I keep seeing Raycons a lot as well. What do you all recommend?

[flint widget]

For music? Or for noise cancelling?

[placid urchin]

Both!

[flint widget]

I use Apple AirPods and I really enjoy them however they are only good if you have an iPhone

[brazen stone]

if your looking for both music and noisecancelling, i wouldnt go for loops because they have no bluetooth- all they do is cancel or soften noise

[placid urchin]

Oh, ok

[cunning dragon]

And they make your voice really loud

[brazen stone]

Yea

I mean most headphones do

Also i made rhis today i loev it smmmmmmmmmm

[sharp swan]

Hii, hope it’s okay for me to ask this here if not i’m sorry my bad. So i’ve heard at some autistic people may copy or imitate a character or person form for example a film or series. And that it could be unconsciously. So i was wondering if that was true for anyone here, and if so how you do it? if you know you do it, that is. Cause a friend took a picture of me while i was waiting for the bus, it was a silly gesture we sometimes do. And with that we were looking at how fancy looking the pose i had was, and after talking about it for like 5 minutes I realised it’s the exact same pose as applejack from mlp equestria girls during the ball from the first movie i think. It got me thinking why it could be that i do that. So um asking to see if it’s something normal or just me being silly

[placid urchin]

I think it's very common for autistic people to imitate others! I know personally, I have copied a lot of gestures and phrases from people in my life or fictional characters.

[brazen stone]

Yea i do it alot

[sharp swan]

Ok ok, thanks. I probably have other examples if i try thinking of them, just not right now. Mostly happy to hear it’s not necessarily me being weird. Guess that checks out on my friends list of examples of things we’re similar in, were he has autism

[brazen stone]

Language, like how i act ect

[sharp swan]

That’s validating, thank you both

[sharp swan]

That’s interesting, meant in an intriguing way

[meager vine]

yea me too i copy poses from arcane lol

[vagrant temple]

Yeah whenever I watch something I’ll be imitating or almost acting like the characters I like for quite a while after

[rose plaza]

Just went to a new psychiatrist (want to switch cause they're closer to my home) and discussed my diagnosis (plural, what's it in plural idk) with him.
Told him I was just diagnosed as autistic, his response: "That surprises me, you don't seem that way to me at all"
Well duh, dude, first off, you don't know me, second off, we've been talking for 2 minutes at most, 3rd, dude I'm high masking why else would I have only now gotten a diagnosis and FOURTH, you're not a professional about autism, wtf

I'm literally here with my plushie, fidgets, a bag with my special interest and my dad drove me because I'm anxious about driving even though I have a license
Sounds pretty autistic to me, but what do I know

[idle elm]

Diagnoses is plural for diagnosis I’m pretty sure /info

He seems icky

[digital quail]

thats autistic too me

[cunning dragon]

Ooh imma grab mine hold up

[digital quail]

Im surprised at how low depression is with mine

are you happy with yours?

[idle elm]

This was ours

Like 2 years ago though so might’ve changed

[brazen stone]

From a couple months aho

Help i just did it again what everything bar abnormal posture went up

[meager vine]

i should redo it too

[young fossil]

Lol I did this and got “mild to moderate autism signs”. Like I’ve got my autism diagnosis after five minutes of talking to my therapist. It was that obvious.

This test doesn’t work if you are extrovert

[sharp swan]

Hey sorry, why do you say/think that?

[young fossil]

I mean that it shows that I don’t have autism when it’s obvious I do.

I think it’s because I showed to much extroverted traits

[sharp swan]

Oh okay, well that checks out

so due to extroverted traits the test thinks you don't have much obvious autism or?

am trying to understand here, but focus i lacking sorry /gen

[radiant oak]

Question I am dyslexic and don’t enjoy reading but I like to read fiction more but I like nonfiction in general(for example using tts or when someone reads to me)

[idle elm]

basically what I'd do is thumbs up = prefer non-fiction
thumbs down = prefer fiction

[radiant oak]

Thanks

[radiant oak]

Bruh

[idle elm]

Thumbs up = i prefer alone time
Thumbs down = i like hanging out with people

[stuck apex]

Test asking about autism symptoms often being partially incomprehensible to people who tend to take things literally, is such a weird phenomenon

[idle elm]

I heard they’re set up that way, especially the actual assessments.
Because apparently they normally have all the info needed for a neurotypical to answer, but if you say “I need more context” or “it depends on the situation” it can add points towards getting autism diagnosis

[inland solar]

Autism assessments are really basing around like what everyone thinks the stereotypical signs of autism are, but I don't think they realize that it's a spectrum which is really frustrating at times

[steel pewter]

Autism assessments suck but also they work sort of

[inland solar]

For example, the party example. As many have said, we need more context. Why are we at the library? Are there friends at the party? How big is the party? What is the party for? Context is really important.

[steel pewter]

True

But also, fuck both places???

I don’t wanna go anywhere

[inland solar]

I would go to both if my friends are there lol
Library more than the party if my friends weren't there

[steel pewter]

I don’t do friends

At all

The human beings who I hang out with are ones who’s marginal benefit exceeds the marginal cost of hanging out with them

( I have very little emotional attachment to these people )

[steel pewter]

So, yea, the questions should definitely be more varied and with context because these are two very different answers

[inland solar]

Which is why an in person assessment is probably better even tho it might also not work out bc sometimes they might also just focus on the stereotypes of autism (eg. "Oh you make perfect eye contact with me and can easily have a conversation with me! Youre not autistic!" Or "oh you dont have literal thinking, youre not autistic!" Or "you can catch social cues! Youre not autistic!")

[steel pewter]

I’m very near the definition of the autistic stereotype ( no eye contact, horrid at conversation ( irl ), very literal, etc ) and even I’m late diagnosed and was dismissed multiple times before I got my assessment

[inland solar]

I think the reason why I'm not diagnosed with literally anything yet is bc I mask. A lot. Maybe it was like my brother (diagnosed adhd) and I understood that his behaviors was not acceptable at a young age so I began to understand I should hide my behavior subconsciously before I actually found out I did them in 3rd grade (when i actually started researching autism)
Also my mom is like
"Youre not autistic bc you wouldnt even be having a conversation with me right now!" Or "you dont have adhd youre not like your brother!"
Bc she researched a lot to get my brother diagnosed but I think she wasn't researching the full extent, only like the worst of autistic ppl (trying not to sound discriminating sorry), and doesn't realize that autism (and adhd for that matter) is a spectrum and it's very frustrating (rlly sorry for the very long msg)

[steel pewter]

No prob, I’m diagnosed cause I can’t actually function day to day ( not to sound ableist, it’s just factual, I go to occupation therapy purely just so the therapist can figure out how to get me doing hygiene, eating, and sleeping on a proper basis )

[inland solar]

Another reason is bc I probably have very very high functioning autism (if i am autistic which im pretty sure i am) and like it's easier to just pass as neurotypical and a lot easier to mask

[steel pewter]

Makes sense, I can’t really mask personally. Also, I’m 80% sure I’m semi-verbal??? ( I have a lot of speech impediments ). And I still get fakeclaimed about my autism somehow???

You can’t win, I guess

Either you’re ‘too stereotypically autistic’ or you ‘don’t look autistic’, I’ve gotten both somehow

[inland solar]

Also for me idk if it's just my (technically undiagnosed) social anxiety but when a therapist (tho. I quit therapy... probably a bad idea but wtv) or my school counselor asks me why I might be autistic or adhd it's just so awkward to tell them like I feel like they're judging me and then I feel like I'm all wrong and then I start to think I'm just doing all of this for attention or something

[steel pewter]

Exactly!

[inland solar]

And then I just forget all the signs and when I actually say them it's rlly rlly rlly uncomfortable and awkward and I sound stupid as if like it's not a sign of autism or adhd like it's just something all neurotypicals do
And like when I say I don't make eye contact while I'm not making eye contact, it's just rlly awkward bc I then notice that I'm not making eye contact and like I think what if she thought I always made eye contact and just didn't when I say it

[steel pewter]

I add all of the signs and stuff as pre-done phrases on my talker the day before I talk to a new therapist ( both mental and physical cause they like to ask about that stuff ). It works cause I don’t have to think much about what I’m saying

[inland solar]

That's a good idea

[steel pewter]

Yep!

[inland solar]

I wish I weren't so awkward
And like
I make it so hard for people to help me
Because one
I act different
In front of different people
Two
I hide all signs of depression
Three
I don't know what my emotions are bc I just feel numb inside when I'm trying to think what in feeling
This is totally off topic for this forum sorry-

[steel pewter]

Idk

[young fossil]

Jup

[lean mason]

YES

omfg yes

i said that during my assessment and my psychiatrist forced me to pick one

she gave up bc i almost had a panic attack lol /nav (its fine its over now)

[mellow sphinx]

This was my one from a while ago

When I was younger I went for an assessment and they deemed me not autistic but when I got reassessed last year they were looking through the old report and they found many autistic traits that were listed by the first people as not Autistic traits

Also at recent my assessment I talked for 30 non stop about a tv show I was really into. Then they gave me a pile of fidgets to rank and I put the loudest ones last, by the end of that the lady working with me just knew that I was autistic

[rose plaza]

Nice, thanks! I knew how it sounds plural but didn't know if it was written different :3

[oak thicket]

I‘m sorry you had to listen to these very unempathetic statements :/

[inland solar]

How do you get this/what's the website?

[idle elm]

Idrlabs I believe

[true willow]

Yes

Btw I took it there today just out of curiosity bc I have already had that test before so I just wanted to check

Because yeah, I'm not very aware of it bc it is my normality

Idk this is mine, I had to redo it because when I took the test for the first time I was masking way too much, and I didn't even knew I had issues with noise even tho I've been having bad sensory overloads LOL

I love how it is different for every person

[true willow]

RIGHT, And then i say I don't take things literally while clearly i'm all confused

[true willow]

Idk if this is dumb but I noticed that I've haved stopped stimming sm with my fidgets, it's so bad tho, i think masking is back

And I feel so bad for it

I should stop with the self ablelism

[inland solar]

Thank you!

[meager vine]

Just did

[idle elm]

Redid it

Really happy to see the depression one so low

[steel pewter]

that tracks

[round field]

This is mine, makes sense

[idle elm]

helloo :D

[trim osprey]

I haven't done this in like 6 months and it's definitely changed since ghen

[rustic coral]

hii

[heady valve]

hi :D

[vagrant temple]

Hiiiiii

[round field]

Are there any other autistic people here that get extremely scared of travelling by public transport, like, i have not other choice but im still almost pissing my pants every time even though ive done it a lot

[steel pewter]

Yep, I don’t do public transport generally

Last time I took public transport I was with folks so it was mildly less stressful

[rose plaza]

Absolutely

[brazen oyster]

Does anyone here ever have meltdowns in their dreams? Is that a thing that can happen? Because I have extremely distressing dreams when I can actually remember them, which almost always conclude with my dream-self in what could be described as a meltdown state, and I don’t always wake up, which is worse. When I do wake up, I feel that same level of distress for a while and like I almost could do that irl because I find it hard to separate my dreams from reality (I dream VERY realistically). Could this be a form of internalized meltdowns? Because it’s what happens in my head whenever I’m in a stressful situation like that irl, I just know I shouldn’t do that in front of people if I can avoid it.

Sorry that doesn’t sound very clear now that I read it

[round field]

I get the exact same, i feel you

[limpid talon]

GG @round field, you just advanced to level 8!

[inland solar]

Anyone know any good weighted blankets (preferablly on amazon)? I'm looking for one (just looking probably not buying) and I'm looking for like cool designs or patterns 🤷‍♂️

[rose plaza]

Can't help there unfortunately, mines just grey, but I put a normal blanket cover on it so I can switch design :3

[inland solar]

Oh wait that's a good idea lol-
What's your blanket? /nfta

[abstract pine]

That's really smart, I would never have thought to do that

But that's a good idea

[inland solar]

I'm getting my ears pierced in a few months, I'm pretty scared that it will hurt, any tips?

[cunning dragon]

Mines grey too!!

[lean mason]

i mean its a piercing so it will hurt /vlh

what exactly would you like tips for?

[round field]

Oooh i have a tip, DONT go with the piercing guns, they are unsanitary, break the tissue instead of pierce through it smoothly and i find thst they hurt more than when a professional piercer does it, with piercing guns it also heals waaaay slower:))

And healing is always an ass because you cant really sleep on it

[inland solar]

Lol that's a good point-
I think I probably need like
Tips for getting like rlly rlly scared when I'm actually there

[heady valve]

Does anyone else here like when their food is flavorful and saucy as opposed to the stereotypical bland foods most autistics perfer?

[steel pewter]

I put hot sauce on everything because that’s one of the few flavours that come off strong to me

[round field]

Yeah with some safe foods yeah! I think its very much sensory seeking behaviour haha

[stuck apex]

Yeah both Kimchi and garlic are safe foods for me, but other safe foods I have are more bland so for me it's both

[young fossil]

Could someone explain how you can be autistic if you are a sensory seeker? /gq /nm I’ve always thought of autistic individuals as people who avoid sensory input due to easily overstimulation.

[inland solar]

Correct me if im wrong but autistic people could also get understimulated (im undiagnosed and i do)

[pulsar mica]

Yes autistic people can fit into 2 different categories usually: sensory seekers and sensory avoiders! Or sometimes a mixture of both ( like me). That is where my love for big conferences and concerts or even big noisy sports games comes into play. I love those things because I can tend to be understimulated a lot as well as overstimulated in situations where multiple people are talking at once or when there are a lot of people in a space not involving my special interests! This is also where stimming really helps me because it gets my body Moving and helps me feel busy when I'm needing that! Hope this helps!

[rose plaza]

I have to go (I'll do it in the next few days) and look for the package, it was a brand from the Netherlands I think

[rose plaza]

Honestly, me neither! It was my mum's idea

[lunar cargo]

in the dsm-5, hypo/hyper reactivity is the 4th thing listed under criterion B. you only need to meet at least 2 of the 4 listed there to be autistic so technically you dont need sensory differences at all to meet the criteria, although it is pretty common and ive never met an autistic person who doesn't meet it lol

[pulsar mica]

Ya

[round field]

Comfort censor
||sometimes i just kinda hate being autistic because of my hyperfixations, i keep trying to start conversations with allistics about things im currently hyperfixating on like a themepark called Efteling, but people keep telling me they dont want to talk about it and then go on with another conversation without me, i dont know what i'm doing wrong, i just want to talk with someone without being shut down, i dont know how they all find such common interests with eachother, i have nothing in common with anyone exept for this one friend but i only see them at school and they barely even come to school anymore ||

[heady valve]

[brazen oyster]

Numbing creams. They take some time to kick in and may not prevent pain but will dull it. Also go with a piercer you trust. Some of them use clamps that further numb the sensation I think

Sorry late reply

[inland solar]

Do piercers usually offer numbing cream?

[inland solar]

Ur good :)

[brazen oyster]

Some might, but to be safe you can get some (I think) over the counter

it's used for some muscle conditions I think? I got mine because my dad works at the hospital and he just took some of their single use packages, but I know other people have done it other ways so it has to be available somewhere

for the record I've never had my ears pierced (the numbing cream was for a different procedure) so I'm not an expert I just happen to know some about the subject because I researched it on a whim when I considered getting piercings

update: I googled it and you can get it OTC

also useful for tattoos!

[inland solar]

I'm getting them pierced at Korea so idrk how it would work there

[brazen oyster]

it might be safer to get your own then

you apply it a little beforehand, usually 30 minutes or so for full effect but it will vary depending on the product. It'll say on the packaging

[inland solar]

Oki thanks :)

[quaint phoenix]

do u guys have any noise canceling headphone recs?

[brazen stone]

Do you want it to have electronic connection? Or just like only noisecancelling- like ear defenders
If eardefenders- proforsho is realky good- 34db, relativeky chrsp for the db cancellation too

[idle elm]

im making an autistic groupchat on discord and i was wondering if any of yall would like to join??

[frank wigeon]

🙋🏻‍♀️

[steel pewter]

Sure, why not

[onyx moth]

um im not sure if its a different arsoncrows but it says that they are not taking any friend requests and theyll need to add meto become friends and the only way to make a groupd chat is to friend request people an then do it i looked it up cuz i didnt know how to make a group chat on discord and thats what is said on the discord website/ gen / info

[onyx moth]

and ive also sent you a friend request is well in order to make the group chat

[steel pewter]

Oh, right, sorry, idk how to fix that setting, I sent you a frq tho

[quaint phoenix]

i’d love to!! :3 /gen

[limpid talon]

GG @quaint phoenix, you just advanced to level 4!

[onyx moth]

im actually in the middle of making a sever cuz it fits more people as the group chat only can fit 9 people so yh /gen

[rose plaza]

I used soundcore noise cancelling headphones from amazon for a good amount of time. They're relatively affordable and good quality for the price! They have three modes of noise cancelling (inside, outside and traffic) and a normal and transparent mode.
A few months ago I switched to bose quiet comfort, sort of as a gift to myself shortly before getting my autism diagnosis.
They have more effective noise cancelling in comparison and fit my head shape more comfortably. They're definitely more expensive so I got them on sale. They have a shorter battery life than the soundcore (pretty sure that's because of the better noise cancelling), but they still last quite a while.
You can also "make" your own music and noise cancelling modes in the bose app, haven't tried that out yet though

[idle elm]

ohhhh okay, thank you!! :D

Emma ↩️

[Reply to:](#1176007949034995753 message) I used soundcore noise cancelling headphones from amazon for a good amount of time. They're relative…

[brazen oyster]

mine are expensive sony ones but my dad got them on sale for christmas and gave them to me when I left for uni. They're pretty sweet and I have them on me literally all the time. I don't know exactly what model but they're all fairly similar. My friend has a pair made by skullcandy that I can't speak for personally but he's had them for years and is very sensitive to noise so they can't be too bad (they're also cheaper, around $150, so he saved up to get them but it was worth it). My advice is to look up reviews and don't be afraid to spend more money on them if that's accessible to you. A good pair will be so worth it

[brazen oyster]

you can make your own balance levels with mine too, in a connected app. it's so fun to play around with

[quaint phoenix]

omg guys i might be getting an autism assessment soon!!!! i get vocational rehabilitation services because i’m visually impaired and hard of hearing as well and they said that apparently they could pay for the assessment

[brazen stone]

Yayyyyyyy

[radiant oak]

🎊🎉🎊

[inland solar]

Random thing that I just want to say-
I love the texture of those soft throw blankets. That's all. :)

[ashen elk]

Sup!

i will say im unoffically diongosed but i have the charctoristics and also have tested very high in the spectrum

[steel pewter]

I found a work around to the evil that is jeans

I found this one local brand that does more sensory friendly clothing — they’re quite expensive though — and they do jeans. I quite like their jeans. I also found linen button downs. Which turns out, is a quite good quality alternative to the usual synthetics

The only con is it’s like 40 usd per button down, which I have no idea if that’s a lot

( My view on pricing is warped because of my need to buy purely natural fabrics and I tend not to go for mixes either so most of my stuff is 100% a certain fabric. I only have a handful of synthetics in my wardrobe overall )

[round field]

I personally thing the price is quite reasonable :))

[steel pewter]

Fair

[onyx moth]

what is the brand called cuz one of my friends are looking for sensory friendly jeans??

[steel pewter]

I don’t think they exist outside the Arabs

Yep, checked, they don’t have any stores in Europe

[idle elm]

Happy my new reusable ear plugs on string are here and one double pare of ear plugs for musicians came with a case. I love having a case to move from all the medical lanyard we wear anywear away from the house

[topaz gazelle]

Can anyone recommend good earplugs? They are sometimes relatively expensive and I don't want to buy some and then regret it

[round field]

Just dont buy any of the fancy ones cool looking ones, theyre just overpriced and dont even eork that well, most of the time the uglier they look, the better they work, at least thats my experience

[stuck apex]

The only big benefit of the expensive fancy loop ones is that they are flat/round on the outside and don't stick outside of the ear like some cheaper ones do

And the fact that they fit like in-ear headphones compared to the foam earplugs that never stay in my ears

So unfortunately for me the overpriced ones are the only ones that really work well

So I'd recommend trying out some cheap ones and if those don't work for you, you can still get more expensive ones that might work better depending on the shape of your ears and your preferences and needs

[idle elm]

Most people anywhere I look say loops aren't really worth it but giving the cheep ones a chance can't hurt. Though I didn't like that the ear covers were like ear phone covers. I never liked those kind because cleaning them can be a pain. Though some like loops I did see with out ear phone cover holes. I just didn't get them this time due to I am really not sure if me and the system will like the ring in the ear. It may be a sensory issue for it touching so I decided to do more research and see if a cheep pare is worth it because it's better to try those eventually and if I like them work my way up to a expensive pair, compare them and know which one keep buying. I hope it's the cheep ones though because there are so many of them and our whole system is super picky when it comes to ear plugs because we used them every time we go anywhere past the driveway when we're not using our ear defenders inside sometimes or on a non hot or rainy/humid day since they can't get wet

I do like the cheep ones have lots of colors we like and ear cover sizes because the body has a normal sized left ear and slightly bigger right side ear hole since we can tell by hearing less in the left ear and more in the right when wearing pretty much any ear plugs of the same size. That is why I really want to try a ear cover with no hole in it version if I find the really nice pale blue one we saw on Amazon that comes with that kinda ear cover because we were drawn to it just not ready yet

[stuck apex]

A lot of silicone tip in-ear earplugs (like the loops, but there are cheaper similar ones I think) come with exchangable tips in 3 different sizes so you could try putting a smaller tip on one side

[abstract pine]

Yeah, I know I was looking on Amazon for loop earplugs and saw a lot of off brands, and one that is only like $8 people were saying were more comfortable than loops and worked better, so I guess it just depends ¯⁠\⁠\_⁠(⁠ツ⁠)⁠_⁠/⁠¯

[idle elm]

That is what were wondering. Just hope they work because we really like the way they look and what they come with though reviews on many sites say loop and loop like ones are bad so we're debating

Alin ↩️

[Reply to:](#1176007949034995753 message) A lot of silicone tip in-ear earplugs (like the loops, but there are cheaper similar ones I think) c…

[stuck apex]

I think it's not that they are bad perse, more that different people have different ears and needs. For me the loops work well and classic foam earplugs don't work at all, for other people it's the other way around, or they need another option.

I hope you can find something that works well for you /sincere

[steel pewter]

I second this statement. I can’t use earplugs at all personally ( I have an issue with my outer ear that makes it extremely sensitive, earplugs just hurt )

We use noise-cancelling headphones personally ( looking into ear defenders but headphones are currently working fine )

[stuck apex]

Yeah exactly, for example I can't use over ear headphones because they give me sensory issues, so our needs are just different but earplugs and headphones/ear defenders are still both good products.

[brazen stone]

I use basically omly over ear headphones- if i do need extra cancellation i have a pair of ear plugs that i think are actually meant for swimming but they work really well to get to that little bit extra i sometimes need wearing my 27db ear defenders- i have 34db headphones now so i dont need to do it very much anymore bht i still carry them around

[frank wigeon]

Does anyone else have a problem with not being able to throw away things (basically hoarding) or have something changed, but mainly from childhood or anything with memories? Like, there's a footstool that used to have one particular fabric, and then suddenly my mum changes the fabric on it to something with a different colour, pattern, texture, everything. I felt like I was about to have a ||panic attack||. And there's a few plastic things that are slightly broken but I want to keep because I feel if I don't then I will forget.

[nimble rapids]

same!! but im not sure if it's caused by the same thing im pretty sure mine's just apart of ocd

[steel pewter]

Hoarding can be part of both ocd ( in ref to what zenny said ) and autism. I would link the articles about it but I can’t and idk if saying the titles would be skirting the rules so just trust that those articles exist

( articles as in medical articles )

Also, resistance to change is also an aspect of autism

[idle elm]

Wow I have ocd but never knew that symptom

ArsonCrows [☀🪶] ↩️

[Reply to:](#1176007949034995753 message) Hoarding can be part of both ocd ( in ref to what zenny said ) and autism. I would link the articles…

[steel pewter]

It’s so much a symptom as an aspect? Like, when you’re going for an ocd assessment, they’re not gonna ask you about hoarding but it’s a thing that’s very common with ocd

[idle elm]

Ah I see

[idle elm]

I am at the end of the month ordering these. And this is a close up of what I am thinking of using on my loops as a strap since mine won't come with one but idk if the plastic part will fit through the hole. Anyone with looks can answer me because I am hoping to know before I order them at the end of the month so I know if the string will be worth buying or not especially since I am allergic to nickle. That is a zoomed in part of the straps I might get

[stuck apex]

You can untie the knot inside the plastic part, pull just the string through the loop and then re-tie the knot
Might be annoying but could work

[idle elm]

Ooo I never thought of that

[rose plaza]

If untieing it doesn't work or you won't to shorten the overall length you can pull the string at the knot side, make a new one at a good length for you and cut the excess off

[limpid talon]

GG @rose plaza, you just advanced to level 15!

[brazen stone]

Whats yalls opinion on microfiber towels, cause i like half love but half hate them, i like scratchung stuff so they sre like nice ti scratch but also like? Idk tbeir weird

[idle elm]

Like how smooth they are. Hate how much they stick to my skin ewww

[round field]

I thought i had no problem with them until i accidentally touched one in a bike shop and i almost cried

[brazen stone]

Oh no

[lean mason]

i dont like. super itchy and rough. i can handle touching them for a few seconds and i dont necessarily get a panic attack (unless im already feeling unwell), but i still dont like them /neu

[brazen stone]

Grah i hate the thing with to be polite and like stuff and respectful you haev ti make eye contact and stuff- at my martial arts its the worst, we are a leadership student and also one of the older teens in the family classes so we are meant ti set a good example but we can barely sit still- often have to bring fidgets into floor, and i cant make eye contact with my coaches and they are always to everhone how can you be respectful and people list things if and eye contact and sittinv still are always on there and some of the worst of it is there is quite a few other neurodiveregent students, especially younger kids and its just like argh, my coaches dont understant. They arent neurodivergent, they arent autistic or adhd and it icks me so much i hate it

Anyway i hate the thjng of making eye contact

Also i lost my favorite and most descreet fidget

[rose plaza]

Same, I kinda like them cause they're smooth, but using them is meh-
I will do it if I have no other option, but it's definitely not my first pick when choosing a towel (I only take them for space saving reasons)

[stuck apex]

I love some of them but dislike others

I have a set of microfiber towels that are basically the only towels I use

But I don't like the microfiber towels my sisters have

[round field]

I have posted a question on health forum and i was wondering if anyone here is interested in reading it and maybe giving advice or sharing life experiences, its about ||meltdowns and nssi|| make sure to read the TW's tho as it might be triggering for some people!!

[young fossil]

I suggest that you tag the channel so that it’s easier to find. /lh

[brazen stone]

Hey what voice apps do people use? I finally ahve the ability to get a better one

[round field]

How do i tag a channel?

[steel pewter]

What’s a voice app in this context?

[brazen stone]

Like an aac device but an app for your phone

[steel pewter]

Ohh. Right. I’ve never heard aac apps called that, anyways!
Symbol-based:

• Cboard
• Weavechat
• TD-snap^
• Proloqou2go*
• Coughdrop*
• Leeloo
  Text-Based:
• Vocable
• Spoken
• Proloqou4text*

[ ^ IPad only, * Cost money ]

Crits for the free symbol-based ones:

• Cboard — creator supports AI art but tbh, it has nothing to do with the app, the app doesn’t contain any AI art or anything
• Weavechat — I find it hard to edit personally, depends on you really
• Leeloo — quite childish

I’ve not used the payed ones cause I have no money so I can’t give any crits for those

[idle elm]

I wish aac apps could do more without paying for it since I don't have that money though I am finding the Winnie the pooh sign language book I am learning from helpful for non verbal autism though Americans who sign get a bit confused when I sign with it sometimes

[young fossil]

You do # (+ the channel name)
Ex. #🍄general

[round field]

Aah okay

Its #1361075468518035719

The censor doesnt work on channels but only found out after

[steel pewter]

Honestly, as long as it functions, I’m fine with it

The real evil is if they lock the voice behind the paywall

What’s the point of having a free version if the most essential part is what’s locked behind the paywall?

[frank wigeon]

Speech assistant AAC. It's text-based and some people I know that have fnd-related speech problems use it

[idle elm]

Considering trying to get an occupational therapist again because I’ve gotten more rigid in my thought processes lately, but last time they wanted to do their own assessment with 3 people to one which- uh no thanks I’ve done an assessment already??
If anyone has any tips or things to look out for lmk!

[brazen stone]

I got one called AAC board(I chose it cause it had the highest rating-4.7 stars, and it's really good so far

[steel pewter]

You mean AAC Cboard aka Cboard or? Cause I swear the app you’re talking about ( AAC board ) doesn’t exist and you’re the second person I know to leave out the second C

[brazen stone]

Oh yea aac cboard- I misread it sorry

[steel pewter]

No problem, I’m not annoyed and as I said you’re not the only person to make this error, it’s kinda a them problem for putting 2 Cs right next to each other

[brazen stone]

Ah

[steel pewter]

I also use it as my main currently, it is very good

Have you discovered the live type feature yet?

[brazen stone]

No?

What is it?

[steel pewter]

It lets you type in Cboard if you want instead of using the buttons — like if you have something long to say or if you don’t have a button for a certain word

You can turn it on in settings

[brazen stone]

Oh cool tbanks

I just did it :)

[flint widget]

ChatterBoards works well for me

[idle elm]

Boost!

Nova/Noah - he/they ||BIRDS ↩️

[Reply to:](#1176007949034995753 message) Considering trying to get an occupational therapist again because I’ve gotten more rigid in my thoug…

[brazen stone]

What are people opinions on aba therapy here, I've never been and I've heard mixed views, I just want to hear others opinions and stuff

[steel pewter]

I think it sucks. I have not seen 1 thing that makes me support aba in any extent because it doesn’t make any sense. Besides the fact it reminds me of dog training; it assumes that the symptoms that arise from our autism are ‘behaviours’ implying we’re doing them on purpose and also encourages all therapists even non-aba therapists to be batshit with autistic people ( case and point; the therapist ( non-aba therapist ) who grabbed me to force me to make eye contact with them because that was a my fault thing apparently )

I say this as a medium support needs autistic. The solution to higher support needs people struggling with something is not aba; it’s occupational therapy, speech therapy, or other similar types of therapy that are actually logical and have basis.
I go to occupational therapy for hygiene issues — trouble showering, brushing teeth, etc — as well as motor issues and proprioceptive issues and I’ve found it extremely helpful on all fronts

[brazen stone]

Oh that's ||shit||

[brazen stone]

Yea

[steel pewter]

Yes. It doesn’t teach autistic people how to cope with things or regulate or anything, it just teaches them “i think this thing is wrong so you’re not allowed to do it”

[brazen stone]

Yea

[steel pewter]

I learn self-regulation in occupational therapy as well because that’s very relevant to being autistic and you know what my occupational therapist advocates for me doing that aba doesn’t want autistic people doing? Stimming. They made me a little keychain with cards sort of thing of stims that I found helpful in therapy so if I was having trouble regulating I could check my little stims keychain for methods

So, yea, aba sucks, there are better therapies out there

[cunning dragon]

That’s so cool!

[steel pewter]

Yea, they’re the coolest OT

[cunning dragon]

I’m hopeful for mine, my mum put in a request with autism [insert state here]

[vagrant temple]

My parents are gonna try to get ndis funding for me, we really aren’t that hopeful tho.

[cunning dragon]

Good luck!!

[vagrant temple]

Thanks! Unfortunately even tho we are going to apply we are fully expecting it to be rejected despite having multiple reports and peoples inputs (school, physio, support staff etc)

[cunning dragon]

I’ve started calling confusing neurotypical social stuff “The Neurotypical Dance” and I’m not sure if I got it from somewhere or not 😭

[frank wigeon]

Going for an ADHD assessment tomorrow. What do I say/do????

[steel pewter]

This is the autism thread, I clarify this cause not every autistic person’s had an ADHD assessment ( cause not every autistic person has adhd, me included ) so would suggest a different one or maybe making a thread cause it looks to me like most of the adhd threads aren’t active

[frank wigeon]

Ok, thanks

[stuck apex]

I'd recommend using an existing thread as they usually become active again once somebody starts asking questions there again

[robust flicker]

My best friend's college is doing a sensory friendly performance and it makes me so happy

I don't have autism but it helps them enjoy the performance which is amazing

[brazen oyster]

Be yourself though. Assessment is the time to let all those beautiful ND traits shine, as much as possible (because some masking is inevitable).

[idle elm]

As someone who has had server ADHD since I was a kid trust me just be your normal self even if you feel like freezing just tell yourself its ok to be yourself because it will help you get the best chances at getting the diagnoses you feel like you need to help better your life and know who you are and why you do things better. Good luck. ADHD and assessments can be scarry but trust me it will be ok and you got this. Trust in who you are, you know yourself best. My host identitys ADHD assesment they have had ever so many years since they were 5 was a weird test in a cold room in front of a pc with a joy stick and they had to be alone and look at a black square and a white square. The point was to see how many times you can click the right square and click the right square in the right box. It was a very weird test for them and they are not sure how in the world it determins ADHD buts that's what they had to do. They wish they could of has a test to asses their symptoms over the years and ask them things because they feel like that works better but instead get that weird test

girlygamer1298 - pls @ ↩️

[Reply to:](#1176007949034995753 message) Going for an ADHD assessment tomorrow. What do I say/do????

[stuck apex]

I got a similar test done when I was 15, I think it was done to measure attention span or something. It was accompanied with questionnaires for me and for my parents tho so it wasn't the only part of the diagnostic process.

[idle elm]

Ah that has always been the only test and it really doesn't di to well to us to measure attention span

[quaint phoenix]

Uhhhh I don’t see a self promo channel so I’m gonna ask here, does anyone wanna see a video I made for my class? I talked about my whole journey with self advocacy and stuff and how no one believed me for years when I told them I’m autistic

[idle elm]

#promotions here’s the promo channel lol. /lh /info

frogspawn - please @! ↩️

[Reply to:](#1176007949034995753 message) Uhhhh I don’t see a self promo channel so I’m gonna ask here, does anyone wanna see a video I made f…

[quaint phoenix]

OH lol thank you! :D

[brazen stone]

Does anyone on here have reduced or similar days for school? School is getting way too much right now and I need advice, I'm gonna see how it goes next week (we only had a three day week today and today was the last day) idk, is it a good idea, especially cause it's the middle of the year for me, idk I can't keep coming home about to cry from how mentally physically and emotionally exhausted I am, but also I don't want to miss stuff in my classes

[young fossil]

I do a math course on 25% online. (25% is roughly 20 weeks)

If it’s possible I recommend you to try and get “study hours” on your schedule. It’s like spare time for doing homework or catch up on everything.

Is it a stressful period right now or do you think that this will last? One thing with reducing a schedule is that it’s really hard to change back. You can’t skip a class for two months and then decide to jump back onto it. It’s also rough because once you start reducing it’s easy to get into a loop reduce more and more which may be what you need, but it will also be a lot to catch up on later.

If you are going to reduce classes I would suggest that you start with classes that doesn’t have follow-ups. For example an English course may build upon an easier course where arts and crafts could be a single course.
That way you’ve got less to catch up on later.

[brazen stone]

Yea, it's not so much courses but high school

[brazen stone]

But thanks though

You have given me some good advice that I do genuinely appreciate

[young fossil]

Glad if I could help you to some degree at least. /lh

[vagrant temple]

Currently feeling like I’m in a really bad case of burn out again. Just had it pointed out to me that (again) I’m being used by someone but I don’t know how to cut things off with them. It’s currently the last week of school holidays for me and I have a few classes with them and I don’t know how to deal with this situation bc I just don’t have the energy. Last time someone was using me I waited until they left the school for y11 and then blocked them on everything but I can’t do that this time.

How would I approach this person about it or should I tell support teachers and people like that when school goes back and get them to deal with it for/with me

The burn out is so bad that I am now constantly feeling lonely despite having a large support system of great friends

[inland solar]

I have state tests next week and I'm kinda nervous bc sometimes I'm able to focus but sometimes I'm not
I'm not diagnosed with anything but I do think I am autistic and adhd so idrk if I can even ask for accommodations
Plus I'm like... extremely scared to ask for accommodations anyway

[idle elm]

Got the loops and a loops strap comming in the mail tomorrow. Got the bubble blue ones with many head sizes and love them and its the perfect time to use them because our host identity is co fronting and has a fear of thunder which is outside right now

[frank wigeon]

I was in pure autistic heaven last night. I went to a concert (loud but I was too excited for it to matter) by "supersonic queen" - basically a tribute band to the absolute legends that are queen. And they were so good. And the guy who was singing and acting as Freddie Mercury was so on point. He even came up the sides of the aisles, and when singing "fat bottom girls" he sat on my mums lap 😱 my heart rate went so high. But then I got a video and he came up again and he saw I was wearing a queen shirt and he waved at me and so I basically melted inside. Then he did a sort of meet and greet afterwards and there was a few people that stayed behind. Normally I'm quite shy but because I was absolutely buzzing I had a proper conversation with him and had photos and a kiss on the cheek!!! I feel like I can ||die|| happy now

[rose plaza]

I didn't have anything big like a concert but I drove through a car wash yesterday (with my dad, but I was driving the car!) and it was so great! I love the car wash, happy stimming in it!!!

[frank wigeon]

No matter how big or small, if it means happy stimming time that's all that matters!!!

[brazen oyster]

Omg you just made me realize that’s why I loved the car wash as a kid

[limpid talon]

GG @brazen oyster, you just advanced to level 5!

[brazen oyster]

Learning that stims can be visual (and other senses that aren’t just flapping your hands or something) changed my entire conception of my childhood. Suddenly I had a word for how I felt

There were so many things I did as a kid that no one could explain (not even me) but knowing now that I was stimming (particularly sights and smells) is so validating

[tacit whale]

I want to share the good news that im finally being put on the list to be assessed by the NHS + im getting accommodations at school 😄 (i have been waiting 4 years)

[inland sedge]

YAY

/gen

[robust flicker]

Do any of y'all live in the US?

TW: mention of politics ||Because what the president is doing with autism fricken pisses me off||

[young fossil]

@robust flicker you may want to censor your message as politics can be triggering for some. /info

[robust flicker]

Sorry, that's understandable

[winter blade]

\ with a trigger warning please. /nm /mod

censoring an entire message doesn’t really help. because then people don’t know why it’s censored. /info

also if there’s any discussion of politics then please don’t get too far into it and be respectful. :) /mod

[late tangle]

I don't think it will get very far. HIPPA is. Thing.

Already getting pushback

[rose plaza]

The next days are going to be pretty hot, any tips/experiences on how to handle the heat better? (Staying inside isn't an option for this weekend, unfortunately)
I especially feel like I overheat sooner when I'm wearing my ear defenders, but in-ear plugs don't work for me for longer periods. It's a battle between bearing the heat and bearing the noise •~•

[lean mason]

i sadly dont have tips other than floor time (sitting/laying down on the floor) and ice packs.

i use ice packs a LOT.

oh and handfans. but ice packs are better bc they don't require movement.

[stuck apex]

Staying hydrated is important too
If I have to spend the whole day outside on a hot day, I like filling a thermos bottle with water (or any other fresh drink like juice or cold tea) and add a few ice cubes. That way the water will stay cool for a few hours even if I have to leave my bag in the sun for a while.

Also wide, flowy clothes in light (both weight and color) fabric. Tbf that is my preferred clothing for sensory reasons anyway, but it's also recommended because it can prevent overheating a bit.

If you have access to water while out and about, and you're about to overheat, holding your hands and/or feet in cool water can help bring your body temperature back to normal. It might be good to bring a small towel so you can pat your hands/feet dry a bit.

[robust flicker]

Fair

[oblique basin]

EE

[brazen oyster]

Did anyone else ever unintentionally mask as a kid by choosing a favourite character to act like? I didn’t do masking in terms of watching other people around me, I did it by changing the way I spoke, acted, dressed, etc. to get it as close to my favourite character as possible 😭

I assumed because I was enamoured by them other people would also be and therefore think I was cool. I was convinced every time this would be the thing to save my friendships

Instead it just led to a bunch of people (uneducated on the subject) asking if I had DID 😭😭

[inland sedge]

i've read about this. like literally why

[robust flicker]

Yeah it's so annoying, like you guys don't deserve to be deprived of your support

[brazen stone]

Thinking abt it from the future, I definitely did, I also copied my friends, and I am also realising that I do it still to an extent

[cunning dragon]

Hey does anyone have any tips for unmasking? Less so autism traits and more so your personality? I feel like it’s flexible to the point my personality feels wrong

[latent citrus]

When it comes to unmasking, especially in school and stuff like that, it’s important that you take everything at your on pace and to have people around you (teachers, friends etc) who make you feel good about yourself. This will allow you to feel more relaxed. And also, if you feel like some people don’t like your authentic self, let it be. Just continue trying to be yourself. If people don’t like you, they shouldn’t be in your life. You will eventually find yourself and accept that that’s the way you are. And that it is okay. Don’t be discouraged!! ❤️

[brazen oyster]

for personality, I've struggled with this a lot. I make lists about what I like about myself (or the kind of person I think I genuinely want to be; this is different from masking because you're not doing it for someone else's benefit. It's just normal self development) and try to do things that help me connect to and foster those traits / interests/ etc

[steel pewter]

Does anyone else’s sensory seeking involve sniffing chemicals?

Like, not dangerous chemicals ( I wouldn’t have ever been allowed in the lab if I was sniffing dangerous chemicals ) but just chemicals

[true willow]

Hi!

[steel pewter]

Hello

[true willow]

Yes! The smell of petrol is amazing for me

[steel pewter]

Fairrr. When I was in the lab, I got to sniff so many solutions/chemicals to the point where other people started doing it just because I was

Like, I was with some folks in the lab and we were doing an experiment or something, I don’t remember. Anyways! I picked up one of the test tubes to sniff and one of the other folks looked at me then picked up one of the other ones and also sniffed it. Which caused a total of 3 teenagers to just start passing around these test tubes to sniff and it was after they did that that they looked back at me and went “was that safe?”

It was but the fact they asked after was hilarious to me

[brazen oyster]

Yes. Guilty of doing this whenever I’m exposed to a chemical that I know won’t kill me. It’s a bad habit. 😭

Our glass cleaner at work smells so good

[vagrant temple]

Yesssss, for me it’s nail polish and nail polish remover

[mellow sphinx]

I love the smell of nail polish, petrol, and sharpies

[vagrant temple]

Omg sharpies I love those too

[brazen stone]

I hate spacing stuff- I am so bad at it, the trying to approximate how big or small I need a letter or a shape to be is so hard 😭
With most writing it's easier cause I have lines but cards are a nightmare, also I'm putting this in here cause I believe this is sometimes a part of autism? I might be wrong, tell me if I am and I can move/delete this message or smth

[mellow sphinx]

Omg I struggle with that too, it’s so harddd

[brazen stone]

Yess

[steel pewter]

You can do it with pencil first then outline over that so you can erase as you go if your letters are weirdly spaced

I’ve never had to do that kinda stuff so idk

[brazen stone]

Yea I sometimes do that but it would just take way too long as I would have ti erase it way to many times( this is speaking from experience lmao) it is handy tho when I ne3d to do a like more neat card

[steel pewter]

Fair

[mellow sphinx]

Does anyone basically live in fight or flight but have almost no sense of danger when crossing roads?

[idle elm]

yup

Flappybird 🪻 ↩️

[Reply to:](#1176007949034995753 message) Does anyone basically live in fight or flight but have almost no sense of danger when crossing roads…

[true willow]

that is an accurate description of me lol

[cosmic orbit]

hey heyyyyy

[round field]

I really wish i would qualify for an autism service dog but where i live you can't train them yourselves and they only train them for people with extremely high support needs, we also can't afford one so that just makes me sad knowing i can probably never really go out in public for longer than 30 minutes alone

[tawny marsh]

Hey guys I was wondering if my Friend was upset about something like say she has her Spanish oral and it went so bad to a point where she was crying and I see her upset after it and she is overstimulated and is upset over the topic should I keep on trying to talk about it positively or not talk about it at all,
I did try a comfort her as I know that she is ok with being touched and I also did say she would put on her headphones and I will walk on which is said was okay that I stay with her
The Question what else can I do to help her and try and not think bad about herself

[round field]

For me personally i think it helps when someone changes the topic so i don't have to think about it for a little while, but that might be different for other people :)

[tawny marsh]

Ya she seem in a better mood today like after school

[round field]

Oh thats good!

[brazen oyster]

It can also help to engage her in things that help her feel regulated. Obviously with her permission. Sometimes people just need to be left alone when they’re that overwhelmed. But you could remind her of things she is good at and likes to do.

For me when I’m that overwhelmed I don’t want to talk about it right away. Unless it’s blowing off steam, which I sometimes do just to get the feelings out. After that I try to reduce anything else stressful in my environment and stay with people who make me feel safe. I try to engage in a calming activity or whatever my current interest is, or I go somewhere quiet with a safe person. It also helps sometimes to just let the emotion run its course for me, and to try not to engage with it after. I plan things I do enjoy, so that I don’t dwell on the negative as much as possible.

Also keep in mind you’re not personally responsible for her mental state. It’s very good that you care for her and want to help her regulate. But if she experiences extreme RSD to the point where a poor performance ruins her self esteem, she should probably talk to someone about that professionally to help manage it. In the meantime, just try to make sure she’s comfortable and that you don’t take it personally if she says she needs space or is a little distressed.

[latent citrus]

Yes yes yes! I absolutely love it. It can be more than chemicals for me tho. My favorite smells are literally petrol/gas, garage, basement/attic, guinea pig fur, new shoes, tyres, cleaning supplies and freshly painted walls

[mellow sphinx]

I love the smell of library’s, but I don’t like reading books

[brazen oyster]

Sorry if this has been asked/answered before but does anyone actually have loop earplugs and are they any good? I feel like I’ve never seen a review that wasn’t sponsored or otherwise from the company itself which is a red flag. But they sound ideal.

[lean mason]

i have loop earplugs but theyre far from enough for me. i need active noise cancellation

https://discord.com/channels/746479068186279966/1212235061458370612

loop forum

[mellow sphinx]

Personally I like them, the ones I have block out background noise but I can still here a person talking to me. They work really well when it’s really loud to make the noise bearable.

[north ledge]

i found that mine were too big for my ears even with the smallest earpiece on, and they didn’t block out enough noise (probably due to this) , i prefer my ear defenders

[cunning dragon]

I really want to either get electronic headphones with noise cancelling or ear defenders that don’t hurt when I wear them with glasses

But also any headphones I wear have to be over ear (like my entire ear fitting inside them)

[north ledge]

i have Bose Quiet Comfort Ultras for bluetooth headphones and Alpine Muffy Kids for ear defenders, i find both of them pretty comfortable with my glasses on ^_^ (the ultras are quite expensive, i got them while they were on offer)

the alpines are around £20 i think

i hope you can find something that works for you tho /gen

[cunning dragon]

Thanks! I’ll look into those, just most of my friends ear defenders squeeze my head so bad

Yeah alpine muffy kids is feasible for us (price-wise) so that’s promising :3

[north ledge]

the alpine kids stretch quite a good amount but they also have adults ones - i haven’t tried the adults ones but the kids ones seem to do fine ^_^ (if you have any questions about either of them i’m happy to try answer /gen /nf)

[cunning dragon]

Thanks!!

[cunning dragon]

For the kids one, what’s the texture of the like padding that’s on your ears?
Is it plasticy, really tough, or something else?

I’m picky with headphones

[north ledge]

i’d say it’s pretty soft, i think it’s a little bit “rubbery” (i don’t think that’s the word to describe it but i can’t find a better word rn) , i took a picture tho if it helps at all /gen

[cunning dragon]

Yeah ok! I can handle rubbery, as long as it squishes a bit

[brazen oyster]

Thank you! I couldn’t find anything in forums when I looked it up

[lean mason]

also forgot to mention that yeah. mine are too big for my ears, i had to buy XXS tips. the XXS tips fit better but theyre still too 'long' if that makes sense.

[brazen oyster]

I have headphones like this and they are nice but there’s places I can’t wear them like at work. I tend to get VERY overwhelmed there and I can’t hear customers which makes me more stressed

Thank you everyone for your help!!

[north ledge]

yeah i was gonna buy the smaller ones but it was like an extra £15 on top of the £30 i already paid and i just didn’t find it to be worth it - i prefer my ear defenders for noise cancelling purposes /neu ^^

[latent citrus]

How did I forget my absolute favorite?! Freshly cut lawn!

[stuck apex]

I got them after some colleagues of mine who also use them recommended them to me. I have both the experience and the quiet once. I mostly use the experience for stuff when I'm in a car/bus/train or around crowds of people to prevent getting overwhelmed in the first place.
I'll use the quiet ones, if I'm already overwhelmed or if I need to block out noise when I sleep (like when my sister had a party downstairs or there was construction work early in the morning).

They work better for me than foam earplugs (those don't stay in my ears) or over-ear headphones (they give me sensory issues) so they are ideal for me. But it really depends on preference, your sensory needs and your earshape.

[limpid talon]

GG @stuck apex, you just advanced to level 9!

[sage vapor]

I had the engage one. They are good but I am too loud to myself when I wear them. I hear everything happening in my body and I have the impression to yell when I speak. So they are good if you don’t need to talk 😅. But I find them nice because they still in the ear they don’t fall. But again a negative point : it can become inconfortable to wear them and sometimes it's not enough and I have to wear my headphone. I don’t know if it was usefull because my opinion is kind of mixed about. But if you are in school and need to block sound go get them they are invisible. (Sorry if there are mistakes I am French 😅)

[limpid talon]

GG @sage vapor, you just advanced to level 1!

[frosty grove]

I looked at Loops a while back but wasn't keen on how they looked. I ended up with a pair of Happy Ears plugs, I've had them for over two years now and they're still going strong! They're also absolutely tiny so they come with me everywhere no bother. Maybe an option for you if the Loops don't work out, but I hope you find something that works for you :)

[brazen oyster]

Thank you for the recommendation! This has been great. Very informative

[frosty grove]

Glad I could help :)

[steel pewter]

Any other autistic people heard “In the year of our Lord; 2025” and thought they meant that ‘our Lord’ was 2025 and not that the year 2025 is the year of our Lord cause that’s what 2025 AD means?

I thought people were worshiping years???

( apparently AD means ‘in the year of our Lord’ basically so I heard “2025 AD” and thought people were worshiping 2025 )

[brazen stone]

Anyone have any advice for like stopping accidentally stealing other people's personalities, behaviour, how they act, ect, ect
Cause i always unintentionally do it and I try to not but I still don't fully know how I act really and stuff and idk I hate when I do it cause it feels so fake

[brazen stone]

Sorry for late response but AD doesn't actually mean 'in the year of our lord', it means after death, anything before 1 AD is BC which means before Christ, as it was before Jesus was born and stuff

It is more common now to hear BCE instead of BC, which stands for before common era, and instead of AD some people use CE which stands for common era, but lots of people still use AD and BC

There is also YBP, which stands for years before present, YBP is less commonly used but it allows for years to be more easily displayed in a chronological order, and its easier to understand how far in the past it is
/info/pos

[steel pewter]

The meaning of AD actually changes depending on where you’re taught the meaning of AD. Example; I was taught it was Anno Domini ( which does mean ‘the year of our Lord’ ). This changes depending on the area you were taught the acronyms

[brazen stone]

I think I heard anno domini before but didn't know what it meant, thank you for that infomation :)

[steel pewter]

Anno Domini is also the meaning the Cambridge Dictionary uses for AD

I’ve also heard ‘After David’ for some reason

People tend to be really iffy on what AD means

[brazen stone]

Thank you for telling me/gen

I was taught both abt ad/bc and bce/ce and that they changed it cause of religeos stuff? I think at some point I was taught anno domini, but I mightvw just assumed it meant after death in Latin or something similar, as I had been taught it as after death?? Anyway thanks for the info it was interesting

[steel pewter]

Latin for after death is just Post Mortem

The medical field still uses a lot of just literal Latin and that’s an example of it

[brazen stone]

Yea, I didn't think it was exactly after death, just some variation of it, and english was like oh well we can just make it this and then it has same initials and makes it easy

[steel pewter]

Fair

[tacit whale]

Hey chat. Im struggling to understand how one is actually able to unmask. I feel like i have been masking for so long i actually dont know who i am anymore

[idle elm]

we started with stimming when people couldn’t see. we stimmed before then (pacing, fidgeting with fingers) but we’d come home from school, be home alone, and run around and yell. then we started to stim at school subtly (face twitching, toe wiggling, letting our body tense and relax) and eventually have built it up to be comfortable with stimming more obviously in public (jumping, hand flapping, running around a bit) but not in every setting. like we mask more at uni than we do in a shopping centre. also depending on who we’re with we stim more (with our parents we’re more comfortable than with friends (sounds a bit backwards honestly but-)).

masking facial expressions (being more expressive and being less expressive) stopped existing as much when we started stimming more. we still manage our facial expressions a lot but it definitely feels like they are more real more of the time.

i think everything got better when we started stimming more. we felt more comfortable not speaking, not making eye contact, talking about our interests.. i think it also helps that as we got older we stopped caring what other people think as much and less socially anxious alters took over front. still very socially anxious but if we’re never going to see a random stranger again then why care what they think? also, if we don’t care how other people act unless it’s actively annoying (loud, right next to me, blah blah) then why should other people care. if they’re thinking about their day then they aren’t gonna think of us jumping up and down in excitement unless that’s the highlight of their day.

other things are not to rush it, take your time, be comfortable with it and remember there’s no time limit on when you have to unmask by. we’re aware that we’ll probably always mask in multiple different ways but having the freedom to stim and talk (and not talk) and just kinda exist has been nice. i wish you luck and hope this was somewhat helpful- :)

Rocky ↩️

[Reply to:](#1176007949034995753 message) Hey chat. Im struggling to understand how one is actually able to unmask. I feel like i have been ma…

[young fossil]

@languid scroll

[languid scroll]

Hi, I have a question. I have a lot of stress/anxiety (for no reason) which I think might be because of autism? The problem is that because of my stress, my neck gets so strained to the point I can't sleep and then it gets worse. Can anyone relate? Do you guys know any other solutions that fidget toys to get rid of the stress/anxiety? Physiotherapist and all other things don't help sadly.

Oh and does anyone have any tips on how to stop picking/biting my lips? I am scared that if I use a bite toy that I will never unlearn the habit of biting sth and when I don't have it with me, It'll be even worse than before.

[young fossil]

Autistic people experience a lot of anxiety in everyday life due to changes and unpredictable situations. Even if the anxiety feels like it comes out of nowhere, there’s often an explanation for it. I suppose that you’ve tried making schedules and reduce stimulation, if not that may reduce some of the stress and anxiety.

Preparing stuff like using Google maps to view the place in beforehand or use an egg clock to show how much time you’ve before you have to leave (if you’re like me and have no idea of time.) If you’re able to go by car instead of public transport I def recommend that to reduce input and make it more predictable.

[languid scroll]

The clock is a good idea! I often get stressed when I have a big to do list. For the rest I do everything. I still don't know what causes my stress and I have had it for YEARS on end. Do you think i'd help if I were to go to a autism psychologist?

Also what could be seen as an autistic burn-out? I always thought it was a school burn-out but now I'm not so sure anymore. Gosh, I've got so many questions I don't know where to start haha.

[limpid talon]

GG @languid scroll, you just advanced to level 1!

[young fossil]

It’s totally fine to have questions! I’m happy to try and explain it to you.

[young fossil]

From my experience, the psychiatrist wasn’t to much help. (I think they are more helpful if you have specific situations that you know triggers your anxiety such as speaking in-front of people.) I’m diagnosed with autism, GAD among other conditions and what they found to be causing my anxiety was a combination of multiple burnouts and not having any accommodations.

[languid scroll]

I just feel like no one can help me. I have tried every single thing.

[young fossil]

Jup. It’s hard to have disabilities within a society not built around it. It will most likely be a life long fight, however with time and practice you may be able to develop strategies and become more confident to accommodate for yourself.

Two more things:

1. It’s very common to have both autism and ADHD. If you show any signs of ADHD I suggest that you get an evaluation for that since having both changes a lot when it comes to strategies. (You’re also able to try out medication for ADHD which may help).
2. A lot of people on the spectrum are on antidepressants. (I’ve also heard about autistic individuals for which medication doesn’t work.) A doctor or psychiatrist might be able to help you with that if you ask them.

[brazen oyster]

It will get better! I felt like this for a number of years and just now (two years after the majority of my treatment for GAD and major depression) I’m learning more about my needs and unmasking and the difference is literally life changing. I promise you will get there, one way or another. My advice is to accommodate for a wide range of neurodivergent needs, even if you don’t think you have them. You might be surprised what masking has made you suppress. When I started experimenting with what worked for me I started feeling so much better and understanding myself more. You’ve got this!! <3

[winged lichen]

Hi

[wind vector]

Whos summoning us

[languid scroll]

I am indeed on antidepressants bc of the stress. I don't think I have ADHD, but I'll look into that more.

Thank you guys <3

[cosmic orbit]

any suggestions on what to do when my teachers yell at me or similar things (||physically assaulting me, ex.: a teacher got irritated bc I wasn't making eye contact with her||, etc.) for things related to ASD? It's been happening a lot in the past school years and I just don't know what to do about it anymore. I've tried telling my parents but they didn't seem to care much. Any suggestions?

[naive pendant]

Do your teachers know about your ASD ? I feel like their reaction showcases a need of educating themselves on the matter 🫡
Maybe try to speak about it with someone higher up in your school (headmaster, social council, ...) ? Do you have the support of any healthcare professionals that know your case ? Maybe a letter from a doctor or therapist would help strengthen your claim or explain your situation?

[cosmic orbit]

Yea, they know. I do feel like they need to be educated about these things though. A lot of them do the same thing with ppl with only ADHD too. I could probably email someone about it in the district when next school year starts if it happens again.

[brazen oyster]

also dude if teachers are ||assaulting you|| that's a HUGE legal issue. That definitely needs to be reported to someone, ASD or not. I'm so sorry you've had that experience

[idle elm]

Omg tonight's sensory issues are so bad. Can't stop pushing hair behind our left ear because its bothering us but that isn't working and we have no hair clips but really need to buy some for when we have to wait a while for a haircut that would help so much

[inland solar]

I've been suspecting I'm autistic since I was in 3rd grade, but currently no one is believing me or helping me except for my friends at school. Sometimes i convince myself I'm not because I don't have all the signs if autism and maybe I'm just doing this for attention or something. And it's also confusing because I also think I have adhd and the signs for both overlap and contrdict each other. I wish there was a test for audhd. Im 80% sure im autistic and 90-95% sure i have adhd, but its frusturating because i dont remember if i had childhood signs or not. (If i need to censor anything, please tell me) idek ig I want someone to reply to this to help me, but on the other hand I don't think there is like a topic to help me on... so if anyone is willing to reply and you need more information/have questions you can ask either in here or dms :)

[young fossil]

Curious what you mean with “not all signs?” /lh

[cunning dragon]

I think she means they don’t present with every symptom of autism?

[sage drum]

You don’t have to have “all the signs” to be autistic, it’s a spectrum and it’s different for everyone!

[young fossil]

This is what I thought as well. The symptoms presents differently in everyone. For example we stim differently or have different sensitivity to different things.

[sage drum]

Yess

[inland solar]

@young fossil yep this

[round field]

I completele agree! I think its a different story when you don't meet the criteria in the dsm 5 ofcourse but we're all different, just like allistic people :D

[young fossil]

Yes it is, however that’s not how I read the message. /lh

[idle elm]

Anyone know how to help with sleep deprived meltdowns. With no bed and landlord saying they can't help us when we need their help were having to sleep on the hardwood floor and were in pain and keep having meltdowns while scared. Were not able to get more then give tose and turn in major pain hours of sleep 😢

[rose plaza]

That's sound really awful, I'm sorry you have such rough conditions right now. /gen
Is there any way to get your sleeping place a bit more comfortable? Stacking cushions, blankets, clothes, towels, anything soft you can find, or maybe a temporary blow up mattress or a light yoga mat, anything to make you more comfortable and help with sleeping?

[round field]

Does anyone here have any tips for going to themeparks with extreme noise sensitivity? I have gone to quite a lot of themeparks in my life but have had shutdowns everytime and so i was wondering if anyone has any tips and tricks besides noise canceling headphones

[idle elm]

We deconstructed the back couch coushins and moved there. Also blowup mat would be nice but our host identity husband didn't relize when moving it he put it in a box with screws and it got ruined

Emma ↩️

[Reply to:](#1176007949034995753 message) That's sound really awful, I'm sorry you have such rough conditions right now. /gen
Is there any way…

We look at the upside, we have somewhere to sleep now. Our cat can sleep with us and er can take advantage of the 4 k 65 inch smart tv

I mean it was interrupted sleep but first only 1 interrupted sleep 5 hours with interruption and 5 more hours of sleep night in days. We didn't wake till 6 pm EST😔

Owe and I do plan on us or others buying when we can save for it a 3 square, folding mat like our host identity mom has that can be moved from room to room and stored in closet

[rose plaza]

How do I politely tell my class teacher that he doesn't know what he's talking about and that I'm already aware of it?
Context: I'm in therapy, I also take medication, so from time to time I'm excused from class to go to the needed appointments. I already schedule them to be as non disruptive to my time table as possible because I don't want to miss important subjects. This doesn't always work though, because I'm in (/on my way to and from) school from 7am to 4pm every weekday and you don't always get the appointment times you want. I'm aware that this makes me miss class more than the other students, but it's not every week, it's maybe once a month and in rare cases (like when I had my autism diagnosis appointments) multiple days in one month.
I missed class yesterday because my mum has been in the hospital from Friday to yesterday evening and my brain was fried. I asked for an emergency therapy appointment which I got 11:30 today. (Going to school before wasn't really doable, but I will be coming to my last 2 subjects afterwards).
I let my teacher know and the only response I got was "Hi [my name], please bring a note from your therapist. Maybe you can make appointments late or early and not the middle of the day. Then you wouldn't miss as much class. Best wishes, [teacher's name]"
Now i know I miss class more than others, but he doesn't know how many appointments I DO schedule outside of class, because I obviously don't need to tell him. I don't want to be mentally ill and miss class either and I'm doing the best I can under these circumstances.
I don't know how to answer to his message in a polite way while also letting him know I'm already doing the best I can. He didn't even ask if my mum was okay or wished her a fast recovery or anything, which probably makes me feel more mad than the appointment thing.

TLDR: I miss class once a month or so because of therapy and psychiatrist appointments, I schedule them as best I can outside of class, but because of their opening times and my long school hours it doesn't always work. My teacher sent me a message telling/asking me to schedule them in a way that make me miss less class and I don't know how to politely tell him I'm already doing that and it's not my decision to be mentally ill.

[frank wigeon]

In high school I missed a lot of school due to appointments (at one point I think it was once a week). I told the teachers I had to go to them, but some of them were not great about it. I had my mu turn round and basically go "you don't get to say whether she does/doesn't go to a hospital appointment, [my name] is going to them, end of". Admittedly she can get a little fiesty when it comes to my health, but nobody questioned it afterwards!

[steel pewter]

In high school I had so many missed days in school cause of appointments that I was at risk of being expelled, ( I was not, I made it through high school just fine, I just had to talk to one of the sirs so he could the absences removed from my record ) once a month is perfectly fine as long as it’s not effecting your grades/ability to graduate. If you can then please inform said teacher that there is no way to have these not overlap and that also that the time you schedule your appointments is none of his business ( in nicer words, of course )

[young fossil]

Yesterday a health care professional asked me “what’s the worst that could happen if you don’t follow your schedule or don’t have anything scheduled”. They said it with a voice as if I was having catastrophic thoughts and that it really isn’t that bad to not have a structure.

They also said “you can think about it”, when I couldn’t come up with an answer because I got so chocked by the question.

sigh

I don’t know what to say, however it made me quite angry as they are fully aware of that I’ve got autism and just exposing myself to some unstructured “free time” wouldn’t cure it.

[steel pewter]

That question is so nonsensical???

It would make a bit of sense if you’d communicated in the past that you think something bad is gonna happen if you don’t follow the schedule but that’s not really how autism need for structure works???

[idle elm]

Yeah, for me personally the need for structure means structure is a nice thing to have but if it changes, I just need a few minutes to process then I get on with it.

[steel pewter]

For us we stop being able to think because our brain cannot process the situation anymore

It becomes just a little complete shutdown until we can get back to the schedule

[idle elm]

Yeah - I think for me because it was so demanded of me to get onto stuff again quickly I learnt to be able to adapt quickly, but can feel like crap on the inside even if I don’t show it

[steel pewter]

Makes sense

[steel pewter]

This includes if we get to a task and we have no instructions as well

[idle elm]

I hate no instructions

[steel pewter]

( the defintion of ‘task’ there includes actions like clapping, our brain processes that as a task )

( this does mean we can’t clap, we were never given instructions for it so we can’t do it and trying makes us shutdown )

[steel pewter]

No instructions is evil

[idle elm]

Yeah

[steel pewter]

Who came up with just tossing people into tasks with no idea how to do it?

[idle elm]

Exactly

[steel pewter]

Even with neurotypicals; do they not need instructions???

[idle elm]

Like if you at least give me the starting instruction I can typically figure it out. But even then it’s like trying to build a cat out of lego when you have the instructions for a car

[steel pewter]

Exactly!

Except for me it also feels like I don’t know what legos even are

“What are these cube things? Oh, you can make a car out of them. What do you mean you want me to make a cat? Out of the cubes???”

[young fossil]

Right??

[violet orbit]

Hey hey!!

I had a question and was wondering if anyone else does this as well.

So when my friends tell me I’m a certain character or they have an interest I’m slightly interested in, I always talk about it to them.

And with the characters I obsess over them, and I watch all the shows and movies with them in it.

To me it seemed like interest sharing but I’d look into their interest and try to get into it because it seem cool.

Is this a common thing??

Also, if I hang around certain friends for too long I adapt how they talk and laugh. Not sure if it’s common

[young fossil]

Trying to engage in others interests is a way to get friends, really common especially when you don’t know them that well. They might think that you are a bit to obsessed and get tired when you don’t share the same engagement in the interest.

[limpid talon]

GG @young fossil, you just advanced to level 20!

[young fossil]

With autism and ADHD it’s common to have special interest where you get super obsessed and it’s all you can talk about, think about etc. neurotypical (without autism or ADHD) do also have interests and passions but they aren’t that often that strong.

[stuck apex]

Adapting talking or body language mannerisms from people you spend a lot of time with also seems to be pretty common for autistic people, as far as I've heard.

[young fossil]

A way of trying to fit in? Masking?

[stuck apex]

At least some of it might be due to masking I guess

[violet orbit]

Well all of my friends are also autistic. It could just be that what they are into is interesting, but I’m not so sure

[stuck apex]

Yeah that's another factor

Some things might also be related to something like echolalia or palilalia

At least those three things would be my hypotheses, but I haven't studied it or looked into whether somebody tried to study it yet

[true willow]

Hello

[stuck apex]

Hi there

[topaz gazelle]

Can autism give you tics? I started researching about it and a lot of websites seem to list tics as a possible symptom of autism

[steel pewter]

No but autism is comorbid with a lot of ||tic|| disorders

[topaz gazelle]

Interesting, thank you. I'm 99% sure I'm autistic (I'm in the process of getting a diagnosis; I'll receive my report next session but the doctors have already confirmed I meet all the criteria). I started getting tics recently, which is a new symptom for me, but I was curious because they started happening at my age (21), and not when I was a child (only regular stimming)

[steel pewter]

Yea, you can get temp ||tics|| or things like that ( that’s a ||tic|| disorder )

[topaz gazelle]

Thank you! I'll research more about it and ask the doctor about that

[young fossil]

How do you stop comparing yourself to neurotypical? I feel like a child in comparison to a lot of neurotypical people.

[vagrant temple]

I totally understand how you feel. I find myself doing this all the time and it feels horrible, the main things I focus on are reminding myself that my brain works differently to my mum when she comments on stuff or says something I find very annoying about me. She doesn’t understand how I work or how I feel, and that’s ok, vice versa. Altho it’s hard, I try to refocus my brain back into my lane or at least back into my circle of friends (who are all neurodivergent) to remind myself that I’m not alone or wrong or weird, I’m just me, and some people will understand that and others won’t

[stuck apex]

For me, having neurodivergent and disabled or chronically ill friends also helps a lot. Because it's a constant reminder that we all have different skill and challenges and we're all okay the way we are. I can do some things my friends struggle with and vice versa.

[mellow sphinx]

I agree, I’m have many close neurodivergent and disabled friends and it really helps to be around them and supported by them. When I’m working or at school without them I just feel less than my peers and there are many more misunderstandings.

[topaz gazelle]

This is honestly so relatable. I think one of the things that helps is talking to people that get it. For example, the fact that you asked means I'm not alone in this feeling. Guess we have to remember that everyone is different and is not separate journeys and faces different challenges

[steel pewter]

Why are gastrointestinal issues comorbid with autism?

Like, super super comorbid

I’ve seen some studies that pen us as being 4 times more likely to have gastrointestinal issues than allistic people. What is with that? What’s the connection?

[young fossil]

I don’t know the answer but here’s my thoughts:

1. People with autism can be very strict in what they eat, perhaps having less fiber etc. which can lead to constipation.
2. People with autism experience a lot more anxiety and stress due to the condition. Those things can affect the time it takes to process food and so on.
3. Some people have trouble drinking water which may also affect this.
   I guess that there also may be some genetic thing with this but since there isn’t much research about genetics and autism, from what I know, I can’t say anything about that.

[steel pewter]

That’s all really interesting but also gastrointestinal issues in autism seem to transcend logic in my experience

My theory ( and one I’ve seen in some studies ) is it has to do with Dysautonomia which many folks will know as the category of conditions POTS falls under

[young fossil]

Something to do with the nervous system then, right?

[steel pewter]

Yes! The theory is that there is a high comorbidity between Dysautonomias in the digestive system and autism

EDS is really comorbid with Dysautonomias and also autism so it’s not like it’s not possible that they’d be comorbid and it accounts for differences in behaviour between autistic people but it’s probably multi-factorial honestly

( can y’all tell I put this question here and then spent 2 hours researching the topic? )

[young fossil]

HAHA

I need to research this more, but it’s a really interesting theory! Before I got my diagnosis, I knew nothing of the nervous system. Amazing, and a bit scary, that it can have such a big impact.

[steel pewter]

The nervous system impacts basically every part of body so of course it has a really big impact. The nervous system is how you think and digest and move and how your heart beats and how you know you’re in pain and all that jazz

[lean mason]

EDS as in ehlers danlos syndrome? it is not a dysautonomia, it is a group of genetic connective tissue disorders?? /gen /nm

[tawny marsh]

Getting a assessment for autism over the summer

[steel pewter]

Oh, yea, I’m gonna quickly correct that but my brain crossed ‘very comorbid with dysautonomias’ and ‘is one’

Fixed it

I need to start beta reading my own sentences again at some point actually. Though, I think this is the first time where it genuinely happened from me mixing info up and not missing words or putting them in the wrong order

( I do usually catch these things so if you ever see a ramble of mine and every message is edited; that’s why )

( also sorry for not responding earlier, I was having issues with my vision )

[round field]

I have a little problem, the last days were REALLY busy (themepark, work, school) and tonight i have a big company event that i am going to (because i want to myself) with my friend and dad but i already had a minor meltdown this morning and am so overstimulated, so now i am trying to figure out how to handle all of this and maybe make tonight a bit less overwhelming. Tips and advice are very welcome

[rose plaza]

I'd suggest dressing according to your sensory needs, taking ear plugs with you (small ones if you need to be discreet) and also taking something small but soothing with you (a small plushie, fidget toy, stim toy...)
Also if your friend and dad know about your struggles I'd suggest telling them that you might not make it the whole evening, so they know that you might have to leave early or take breaks somewhere quiet and could bring you there/back home if needed

[abstract pine]

I'm pretty sure posture might be part of it, because if you toe walk it affects your posture and can impact digestion and things. (Correct me if I'm wrong, I saw a video about this a WHILE ago so I can't remember properly)

[steel pewter]

That can affect it??? It might? I have to research that cause I know walking helps digestion but I don’t know if posture matters to that

[brazen oyster]

My chewy necklaces arrived and they are a way better texture than I was expecting I am so happy

This may finally stop me from chewing on myself and all my belongings

[rose plaza]

Sending big happy stims! What does it look like? :3

[cunning dragon]

Thought this was interesting (I prefer this version of the acronym as well)

This was at my OT appt

[rose plaza]

They look really cool, I especially like the leaf!

• - • - • - •
Just had an appointment with my (relatively new) GP where I disclosed my autism diagnosis so that they could hopefully understand and accommodate.
I was positively surprised, the doctor knew what it was and things about being late diagnosed. I had a list of questions and she was really great, asking me if I wanted to read them all or get answers one after another. She explained what she needed to do, what she can accommodate for my next appointment ||blood draw, I'm very afraid of needles and often come close to fainting or do faint||
Very very relieved, maybe I won't avoid going to the doctor (regular check ups aswell as when ill) as much now

[lean mason]

theyre so pretty!!

especially the leaf one :D

[round field]

Ooh i really like that one actually

[stuck apex]

Ohh the leaf looks cool!
I also want to buy a new chewy necklace so would it be okay for you if I asked a few questions about yours? /non-demanding/not forced to answer

[tawny marsh]

Got the dates for my assessment

[limpid talon]

GG @tawny marsh, you just advanced to level 11!

[brazen oyster]

Go for it!

[stuck apex]

What kind of texture did you expect and how is it different/better than what you imagined?
How thick is the leaf? (if it's not too much of a hassle could you measure it or take a photo from the side?)
And where did you buy it?

[brazen oyster]

I wasn’t sure what I was expecting in terms of texture but this is much better than I hoped! It’s soft, but still provides the perfect amount of resistance and doesn’t dent easily. It’s kind of gummy, like if you ever chewed on erasers in school (I did).

The leaf is about 1cm thick at its thickest point, but it doesn’t feel like it’s going to break or get chewed through. I will attach a photo in a second.

I bought both from a shop on Etsy called sensorycreationsbyRN. They had good reviews and free shipping from where I live, but if you’re in the UK or somewhere other than Canada, lots of Etsy sellers have similar options. I’ve seen other listings with the same beads, as creators seem to buy them in bulk. About $15CAD each. They also had lots of styles because they’re geared more toward adults

I hope that helps

Okay it’s not letting my link the shop which is okay but you should be able to find it if you search in Etsy

[stuck apex]

Thank you!!

1cm is a bit thicker than I would like, I think
I found I prefer thinner chewing pendants which are kinda hard to find

[brazen oyster]

That shop has lots that have thin charms! I needed thicker because I was scared to bite through them. But the coin shaped one is about half the thickness and I’m not in much danger of biting through it

[inland solar]

I'm trying to find signs of autism in myself from when I was younger bc I have horrible memory and I don't remember if I did show signs of autism in childhood (baby-toddler) and my mom isn't helpful lol

Is it worth mentioning when/if I'm getting a diagnosis that I used to suck two specific fingers when I was a baby/toddler? According to my relatives it was basically 24/7, idk if I should mention it when/if I'm going to get a diagnosis (idk when im gonna get it hence the when/if, probably later in life)

[round field]

Hi everyone! Because this heat has been overstimulating me a lot (getting sweaty and stuff like that) i am looking for good wipes that do no leave any sticky residue and i was wondering if anyone here has reccomendations, if so please share as i am desperate!! Pings ok for this

[brazen stone]

Is there a word that's like Alexthemia cause I can identify emotions and stuff within myself, but other people I have no clue, and when someone says I'm scared or angry or sad whatever, I don't know whay it feels like, but at the same time when/if I start to understand basically blasts me in the face and I have like over emotions of that emotion
Like I can tell very easily when im sad or smth but

Idk

It's mainly the first

[fathom veldt]

im not autistic but i do sweat a lot, i honestly recommend either makeup wipes or baby wipes but it can be differeny for everyone

[tawny marsh]

Hey guys i was wondering what do people do in the assessment

I have it coming up in a week

[brazen stone]

In exams I have accomodations so I'm in a different room, and I believe I have extra time though I have never used it, I'm also allowed to wear headphones/eardefenders

[cunning dragon]

Mine was more accommodating than others I’ve heard of, but it’s mostly conversation and asking questions, and you should be able to ask for less vague questions as you go

They’ll also likely make you do some questionnaires either during or after

And they might ask to meet with your parents, or even a school teacher which they did with mine

[vagrant temple]

I have extra time, scaffolding on assessments (I think), separate room/small group setting, I’m allowed to wear my headphones for noise cancelling 👍

[cunning dragon]

Autism assessment or like an exam??

[tawny marsh]

Assessment

[cunning dragon]

Like.. for autism? /gen /nttbr

[steel pewter]

IQ test, shitty frog book, and a bunch of childish things

[tawny marsh]

Ya

[steel pewter]

Genuinely, they made me feel stupid the entire time and part of the assessment was to play pretend like a child and I was just like “I don’t know how to do this, I had no childhood, I don’t understand this at all” and they just trying convince me to do it until I halfassed it

[tawny marsh]

Ya i am so worried about it like what will they make me do

[steel pewter]

Most likely an IQ test, developmental history, and the ADOS-2

IQ test is whatever, I forget even taking it; developmental history is an interview with someone you know as a kid, you are minimally involved; and the ADOS-2 is most of the memorable bits, it is where the frog book thing comes from and the miming brushing teeth and all that

[tawny marsh]

Guys if you are looking for comfortable shoes, buy crocs. Omg they are amazing

[brazen stone]

Yea I love crocs but jn the summer they are awful

[round field]

Yesss they become so sweaty and yucky and then you can feel every grain of sand

[tawny marsh]

I just wear them with socks but wore them to the beach and omg was hell

[abstract pine]

I thought you were talking about socks themselves and was so confused 😭 (that you wore socks, and just socks to the beach)

[tawny marsh]

No 🤣

[limpid talon]

GG @tawny marsh, you just advanced to level 12!

[cunning dragon]

I broke my tangle :(((

[round field]

Oh no, how exactly did it break?

[rose plaza]

Several of mine have broken some pieces, it's really unfortunately :/

[abstract pine]

I know the one I had gotten before broke in my backpack, so I hope it my new one doesn't break as well

[ripe ore]

Hi

[tawny marsh]

Hi

[brazen stone]

Wdym when you say you broke a tangle? Like a peice broke off? Could you not just connect it and have it be a little bit smaller? /gen q /lh

[cunning dragon]

One of the little knobs broke off, but it barely was out under any pressure like my last one, so I don’t get why it really broke :/

[frosty grove]

Mine was more like Raven's, just a conversation/interview, and my parents were asked a few things, too.

[cunning dragon]

I think it can definitely depend on country, and the people assessing you

I mean my family tried to apply for a service for asd and they said they wanted to do their own assessment with three people in the room assessing me at once which sounded horrible

[frosty grove]

Ouch, three people at once doesn't sound fun :(

[limpid talon]

GG @frosty grove, you just advanced to level 2!

[round field]

CW: vent

Im at a sleepover with a lot of people but i feel so left out, i stayed in my tent and they didnt even notice, autism is so isolating and lonely sometimes

[idle elm]

Anyone got any ideas for feeling overwhelmed and kinda shut down but needing to clean the house after a professional spray for ||bugs|| I feel very overwhelmed yet my cat is getting into stuff she shouldn't so have to get this done tonight

[fervent timber]

I will sort things in piles first by where it goes or what it is etc because for me it looks more ordered and manageable for my autism

[frosty grove]

When you clean do you have music on? I know of an excellent playlist that helps my brain calm down and focus if that would be useful to you?

[tawny marsh]

Guys how do I know if I am in burnout stages

[young fossil]

How would you describe autism in simple terms?

[tawny marsh]

Autism is a different way some people's brains are wired. It means they may see, hear, feel and think about the world in a unique way

[idle elm]

Ooo yes we love that

TheSoundCollector ↩️

[Reply to:](#1176007949034995753 message) When you clean do you have music on? I know of an excellent playlist that helps my brain calm down a…

Good idea

Seri💖💖 ↩️

[Reply to:](#1176007949034995753 message) I will sort things in piles first by where it goes or what it is etc because for me it looks more or…

[frosty grove]

It's on YouTube, called music to make your brain shut up, by a channel called nobody (I can't link it I'm afraid). Hope it helps :)

[idle elm]

Thanks and the name is funny and fitting

TheSoundCollector ↩️

[Reply to:](#1176007949034995753 message) It's on YouTube, called music to make your brain shut up, by a channel called nobody (I can't li…

[rose plaza]

There are also videos on YouTube for body double cleaning, where other people clean and you can follow along

[tawny marsh]

Assessment is in two days
So nervous

[mellow sphinx]

Good luck

[tawny marsh]

I am like wondering what will I talk to them about

[topaz gazelle]

Received my official autism diagnosis!!

[tawny marsh]

Cool

[tawny marsh]

Assessment tomorrow

My voice is gone after a concert , how am I going to answer all the questions

[tawny marsh]

Is it normal to have a dream about the assessment and it might not be like it at all

[tawny marsh]

Going in now

[sage vapor]

I hope you it will go well 😁

[tawny marsh]

Never again I had a bit of a meltdown because I think I am going through burnout

[sage vapor]

Oh sorry to hear that

[tawny marsh]

Any one have any noise cancelling headphones ideas

Needed them for school and listening to music

[lean mason]

i have bose qc45 and i like them :)

however the cushion pads tend to rip off on mine but its probably because of my piercings

[north ledge]

bose are great ^_^! i have the qc ultras and they’re awesome (although quite pricey - i got them on a sale)

[tawny marsh]

Ok

[steel pewter]

I use a Jabra Elite 85h. They discontinued it according to their website though? Also, their headsets are kinda expensive

[frosty grove]

If you're looking for something cheaper, I picked up some Goji GTCNCPM21s at the end of 2022. I was looking for ones that were cheaper but still had good sound, and these at £50ish fitted the bill. They have their quirks, but I like them and they are still holding up just fine today! One thing to watch out for is that the headband isn't great for my pointy head shape so they do get sore for me after a few hours. But a possible option :)

[rose plaza]

I had the soundcore noise cancelling headphones before i treated nyself to the bose quiet comfort.
The soundcore were really good for the price!
I bought the bose ones before my autism assesment when they were on sale and im really happy with then aswell! Theyre more expensive of course, but with how much i use them it's definitely worth it for me personally :3

[abstract pine]

I have soundcore headphones and they are nice for the price, but if I'm being honest I would save up for nicer ones because it'll be better in the long run and you won't have to buy new ones because they'll block out more sound, as well as be better quality

[round field]

I have soundcore aswel! They were a bit more expensive (€100 i think) but i got them as a gift and they are really really nice and filter unwanted noise really well

[tawny marsh]

Has anyone tried loops

[north ledge]

i have, my personal experience was that they do not fit in my ears even with the smallest ear caps, and i found that they really hurt my ears and didn’t block enough out (which again is probably because they were too big) - there’s an option to purchase even smaller ear caps but it wasn’t feasible as they were an extra £15 on top of the £30 i had already paid for the earplugs themselves

[tawny marsh]

Ya

[lean mason]

https://discord.com/channels/746479068186279966/1212235061458370612 used to be pretty active

[idle elm]

i don’t believe they fit our ears very well (small ears), but they can be very helpful. we wore them walking around before a concert yesterday and they helped block out noise so we could hear people speaking to us. we couldn’t keep them in during the actual concert though because they kept falling out (again, small ears) and it was distracting. we generally use loops for loud environments where our headphones can’t function or when it’s easier (socially or sensory wise) to have something smaller than headphones.

[topaz gazelle]

I am also looking for noise cancelling headphones and earplugs... anyone know of some were you don't hear yourself talking? Like weird, in your ears

[north ledge]

i use alpine ear defenders those are pretty good, for bluetooth i like my bose quietcomfort ultras

[topaz gazelle]

Thank you! And yes, has anyone else used loops?

[sage vapor]

I have the engage one (I think it's the name).

They don’t fall very often but are not verry comfy. I can't wear them for a long period of time because it start to hurt (sometimes very badly)

They block the sound but not enough some situations and if you have to talk you hear your voice in your head so it's very uncomfortable. Now I use them when I have an exam and that's all. By the past I used them in class but had to remove them to talk. And when I was allowed to use my noise cancelling headphone it was way better : to talk and about the noise cancelling.

I recommend them for a short period of time (or longer if you have the possibility to remove them a little bit), when you don’t have to talk and when it's not too too noisy.
Finally if you have to be very discret it's better than nothing but personaly I prefer the headphones

[topaz gazelle]

Has anyone tried the "Vibe" earplugs?

[cunning dragon]

We have really small ears and when we had them they fit pretty well

[abstract pine]

I bought the loop off brand earplugs and they seem to be quite nice, I have very small ear canals and the smallest size seems to work for me and they're only $10, so maybe they're a better option than loops?

I'ma send the Amazon link

https://www.amazon.com/JUSTRVN-Reduction-Connection-Protection-25dB-30db/dp/B0D65QQ6PW/ref=mp_s_a_1_1?crid=O6TZ3UIBCQE3&dib=eyJ2IjoiMSJ9.S5UIUULJQDwphebXj9MeIALAJ1Ys0tHNUTByCDaYMyHWjE5FYeLIaN_TgXsTqvUU2PC3Nc0Y1OQEUxJNcIMluSPEcbv1ZoWVovenpuc3yNe8TN-NwjQUFEj5ZGl-WtSrYinIs84FCsJZsOiVA79BaduAcn4MEypX2cR7dT01dAUP374WDUz2WcS2Svdt2211V00QYrAQpBhlz3maA_Pkog.uQA4aw0LKL3OSPUjp83YygRdm0pKzgBGOg8KVM2cm1E&dib_tag=se&keywords=justrvn&qid=1752968726&sprefix=justrvn%2Caps%2C258&sr=8-1&th=1&psc=1

[idle elm]

I have these but they are loops. One thing I like better then these is the loop version same color and everything has no holes in them but other then that and these ones you show are identical. I just hate stuff with holes like that because of ear wax build up. So the fact that loops have no holes makes it easier to clean. Main reason I hate ear phones is because of ear wax build up from the middle hole. I don't have the loop string though but I have a 3 pack of cheep long rubber strap that fits on loops between the ear cover and the loop ring. They work very well and even have a folding case. The loop strap is expensive

🪶🌲Forrest🏞🦌 ↩️

[Reply to:](#1176007949034995753 message) [(very long link removed, click to see original message)](#1176007949034995753 message) … 📎

[tribal hedge]

I didn’t do an IQ test, I had one four hour appointment where I went with one person and I did the basic assessment, there was the frog book, I was asked to do things like make up a story or brush my teeth, and I was asked questions about school and friends and such. My mom was in another room for maybe three hours, where they went through my whole life and asked questions about things I did and traits I had or didn’t have. On the day I was told I had autism, but that was because it was easy to tell, I was told beforehand that they probably wouldn’t get it to me on the day and this generally only happens if you have symptoms that are very easy to tell if they’re autism. A month after that, I did a basic medical assessment. They just asked for my height and my weight, it only took 10 minutes. A month after that, I got my formal diagnosis, but because this diagnosis was done in Ireland as opposed to England it may be different to how yours will be done. Along with that, different assessors may do different tests or how they test it may be different depending on who you go to.

[tawny marsh]

I did mine in Ireland and it was pretty much the same but I haven't gotten my diagnosis yet

[sage vapor]

Do you have an idea how long you will have to wait to get it?

[tawny marsh]

They said like a month

They have to call my mom quick i dont know if she will tell me about tho

[sage vapor]

Just to be sure : because your mother wouldn't tell you if she had the call about your diagnosis ?

[tawny marsh]

Ya she probably won't so I might not ever find out

[sage vapor]

Why would she do that? (You don’t have to answer if you don’t want, it's just that I find it weird). You won't have an appointment for the results ? Just the call ?

[tawny marsh]

Because she doesn't think i should be autistic and it's just a phone call I think

[sage vapor]

I wish you luck and I hope that you will manage to have the answer that you want

[tawny marsh]

Ya

[tawny marsh]

@tribal hedge is it OK if I send you a friend request just to talk more about the assessment

[tribal hedge]

Often it can come back late. Mine was supposed to be back nearly as soon as the medical assessment was finished, but it took about a month and two weeks.

[tribal hedge]

No problem

[tribal hedge]

Usually, they will send you a full report. They will call if they say they will, but it may take time. The full report is often used to gain access to accommodations within schools, DARE or disability benefits

You are entitled to know your condition, especially if you’re 17-18. It is your life and it is your diagnosis. As somebody who knows of other people whose parents have hidden the information from them it is not just wrong, but for most of my friends that this has happened to they haven’t been able to gain access to life changing accommodations because of this.

[mellow sphinx]

I’m in New Zealand so my experience is probably way different but I’ve had two assessments, both very different, the first was how the others are describing it, I was sat down to read books and play with toys, my other one (the one I actually got a diagnosis from) I talked to someone for an hour or two. She let me talk about my interest for half an hour before stopping me, she laid out some fidgets and told me to put them in order of most to least liked, and I had to talk about school, home, friends, hobbies etc. They also sent out forms to people like my teachers and parents to fill out about me. A few weeks after the talking appointment I was brought back in person to get told about the diagnosis and what’s next. The first one was done publicly and took about a year with wait times and everything and I was misdiagnosed, the second one was private and took a few months.

[sonic patrol]

Does anyone have experience of being diagnosed as an adult where information about your childhood is very limited? I'm wondering how much this will affect the standard assessment process. I understand the importance of information on/evidence of early symptoms, but in situations where this isn't available, are any different types of tests done?

Asking as my partner is getting assessed next week and I have been asked to attend the assessment with him to help with his interviews. I didn't know him as a child, he has very limited memory of his childhood and his parents are not able to support with this

[rose plaza]

I got my diagnosis in December last year and got it done without my parents knowledge (complicated story, they know and understand (mostly) now)
They didn't need anyone to talk about my childhood as a reference, I was worried about that before aswell.
For them it was enough to talk to me about primary school and childhood after that, which I have memories from.
They focused a lot more on now, why I suspected autism and since when, how it's impacting me and I had to fill out multiple questionnaires.

I can't say how it's done in other countries, would you mind sharing where you're from, so people can answer more specifically?

[sonic patrol]

Ah sorry, should have mentioned we're in the UK!

Thank you for the info as well! If it's okay to ask, was it okay for you to just talk about your childhood difficulties or were you expected to bring evidence like school reports etc.? I don't believe he has been explicitly asked to bring these but not sure if it's expected, as when he went to an ADHD assessment in Germany it was required to bring these

[brazen stone]

I just learnt about rsd(rejection sensitivity dysphoria) and it makes alot of sense too me(as in like for me, if that makes sense)

[vagrant temple]

Gotta say that I relate to this a lot too, I know that it’s a common thing with adhd (which I don’t have as far as I know), but I am autistic, so I think it might be a thing that’s more common in neurodivergent people in general with maybe better understanding of it within the adhd community

[topaz gazelle]

This is so real!! It happens to me a lot, esp. in academic and academic-like settings

[tidal night]

So true moon.

[topaz gazelle]

Anyone here in the arts? How do you handle RSD as an artist?

[frank wigeon]

Cam someone help - I just had an autistic meltdown in my flat because my mum was tying to move and sort things out and I want to do it in my time. She told me "stop being so childish, you're an adult now, behave like one" and "stop this temper tantrum right now". I tried calming down but it was so difficult. I tried telling her it's an autistic meltdown, but all she said could say was that it "isn't an excuse" and then kept going on abojt how ungrateful I am (I'm not, I'm just upset and angry about one thing that she full-on knows is a trigger - it happens every time but she doesn't care). I don't know how to get through to her that it's genuinely something I am struggling with and what she does really isn't helping

Sorry the message is so long and if it doesnt belong here, please let me know where I can put it. Thanks 🙂

[young fossil]

Does she knows what autism is? That it’s a condition/disability that is consistent throughout life?

It’s not your job to educate her. However, if you honestly think that she’s worthy of your time and effort, you could try sending her some information about autistic meltdowns and why it differs from tantrums.

If you feel like there’s even a small chance that she won’t even try to listen or understand, I would look around and see if there’s other people that you could lean on.

Autism is a huge part of your life and if she isn’t willing to understand, respect or try to help you out as your mum I think it’s a waste of time to try and educate her.

Excuse my bluntness.

[frank wigeon]

Firstly, thankyou for the bluntness, it made easy to understand. I think she's of that generation that doesnt understand conditions like this. When I told her I was going for the assessment, she was like "are you sure? Is it not going to ruin your career? I don't think you are". And once I told her about the result, she was in denial, saying I never showed it in childhood (I did, she can't recognise it) and that i never used to act like 'this' before (yeah, because I'm now beginning to finally unmask). I want to believe she'd understand and be willing to read it, but I'm scared. I don't want to push her away because I don't have anyone, there's only my brother and he's got his own lot of problems and he might take her side anyway...

[young fossil]

If it makes you feel any better my family was also in denial when I received my diagnosis. It took them about two years to accept and start accommodating for me.

It’s a life changing experience for everyone involved and it’s confusing and messy. However, you can be confused and messy and respectful at the same time.

I really hope that your mother is willing to read the information you send her. If not, would it be possible for you to see if the country you live in offers any help for people in your situation?

@frank wigeon

[tawny marsh]

Im going to france on Sunday for ten days does anyone have advice for the airport and the holiday as its going to be hot and I cant deal with the heat

[sage vapor]

Where are you going in france because the heat depends on where you are in the country

[tawny marsh]

Biarritz

[sage vapor]

Ouch yes it's the south south. The only advice I could tell you are the classical : not go outside around 12-16pm. Drink a lot, if possible a fan or an AC. A hat etc.. everytime you go outside. And maybe buying a water spray and a small fan. If you are sensitive to the sun avoid it the most that you can because the sunburns come really fast in this region

[tawny marsh]

Ya

My comfort item doesn't have the best time in france because the last time i went there he got left there

[sage vapor]

Oh

[vagrant temple]

Does anyone else feel like they kinda start grieving when they finish watching a show or movie, especially when it’s become so important to you? Just finished watching TOH and I’ve found that this is happening to me (again), but this is the worst I’ve had it before, any tips are welcome

[sonic patrol]

Hey, off the back off this appointment I mentioned, my partner has now been diagnosed! He's struggling a bit with being diagnosed later in life and feeling pretty confused, does anyone know any resources I could look at to better support him with this?

[cunning dragon]

Engaging in fandom content helps for me

[brazen stone]

Yea definitely, I was in tears when I finished toh, I often just rematch the show to somewhat delay having to 'leave it' even though i don't leave it cause I'm very much in fandoms of stuff i love- engaging in random is def good like raven said

[brazen stone]

It's fine too wear earfefenders to bed right? I have no clue why it wouldn't be but I'm just wondering(imma also go google)

Yea its fine

[young fossil]

Jup. I like to recreate characters from my favorite shows in the sims :)

[steel pewter]

Anyone else's ability to do things take a noise dive in new enviorments?

I don't mean a little, i mean to the degree where you need assistance to change clothing because you suddenly can't do zippers or need step by step prompting to wash your face

I don't know if this is a me thing or no

[restive hornet]

Hi

[tawny marsh]

Hey

[idle elm]

Well one of my hyperfixations I got with my uncle denmark for our host identitys birthday was a big waste of money. It has so many glitches and not even support cares to help fix. I am very sad now because its un playable and our host identity won't have a birthday present now 😢

We had to stop playing it because it was overwhelming us and our stims were becoming the ||head hitting kind which we didn't mean to do we were just stressed so much with the glitches and emotions from the birthday present being ruined||

[humble veldt]

Hey

[rose plaza]

I have a list of podcasts, yt channels and co of people I found helpful. I could send it to you if you want. It's partly German and partly English, just let me know if you want both or just English and if it's okay to dm you for this.

[sonic patrol]

This would be super helpful thank you! He speaks both languages so happy for you to dm both to me :)

[gusty shore]

Hello !!! ^^

[sage drum]

Hii!!

[tawny marsh]

Has anyone tried listening to guided meditation on Spotify for kids omg it is so good like I fall asleep so quick

[gusty shore]

Personally I really like Calmly, their music always manages to get me to sleep

[tawny marsh]

Ya

I used it tonight and fall so fast

[tawny marsh]

This diagnosed thing is so annoying because all I can think is about it like I am having dream like the people that did the assessment telling me that I dont have so I dont know
I just need my mom to get the call and hope she tells me.

[brazen stone]

that might b interesting to look at, i used to fall asleep to what was basically guided meditation mixed with fairytales and i loved it

[rose plaza]

Any spontaneous short advice for managing a GP appointment?

TW medical procedure
||I have to get a blood draw tomorrow morning, I'm super afraid of needles and very prone to fainting after these kind of procedures||

My mum will be going with me as a safety measure and reassurance

Edit: Managed it safe and sound, I was very stressed but it's over now

[round field]

I had the same when i had to get blood drawn, and my only tip is cry as much as you need because it really releases those stress hormones. Might be an awful tip bit it worked for me haha

Ohh i just read you already got it done, i hope it went okay and you feel better now :)

[topaz gazelle]

Why does homework take so much time with autism?? I feel like everything takes ageeesssss, and the people around me just tell me to try and not make everything so perfect but 1) I don't know if that's the problem and 2) I don't know how to do that anyway

Why does everything take so much time and energy? Also, any tips?

[steel pewter]

1. I don’t know if that’s an autism thing or not cause I get my homework done really fast and idk which of us is weird
2. Depends on the type of homework, if it’s maths homework then you gotta approach it different from English homework for example

Also, the people around you have a point with the perfectionism, it probably isn’t helping with your whole ‘taking too long’ thing

[young fossil]

I believe that this has a lot to do with executive functions (which you have trouble with when having autism/adhd). It affects:

• Planning which makes it hard to know when to do stuff, in which order.
• Prioritize what’s most important which may cause you to do stuff that may not be important to the course. Or do everything in extreme detail cause you don’t want to miss out on anything important.
• Start/stop an action. (Don’t know the fancy name for this one) It can also be a challenge to transition from an activity to another when you’ve got autism.

There’s a lot of tips online, some more helpful than others 🙂

[idle elm]

Ugh the autism is making us struggle to get words out and were feeling so upset because of it

[azure bolt]

Homework takes forever for me bc if I KNOW I have to do it, I can't do it. I love learning when its on my own time and terms, but schoolwork is just so painful

[limpid talon]

GG @azure bolt, you just advanced to level 2!

[azure bolt]

I believe the start/stop thing is called "Autistic inertia"

[round field]

I think if things like homework and other tasks often feel impossible or even like an attack on your autonomy it might be PDA. (not a medical professional, take everything i say with a grain of salt)

[tawny marsh]

The wait for the results are killing me from the assessment

[tawny marsh]

I used to hate doing homework took forever because my mom won't help and my parents are my worse triggers

[topaz gazelle]

Thank you, that's really helpful and validating

[young fossil]

Many people with these diagnoses are sensitive to demands without it being PDA. It’s especially common with ADHD. /lh

[young fossil]

Thanks for educating me! I didn’t know that. /lh

[young fossil]

Glad I could help out :)

[tawny marsh]

How do you get tested for PDA like will it come up in my results of my assessment

[tawny marsh]

Mom is after triggering a episode of my PDA and my mom has a call on Monday

She just kept on giving up about doing a summer camp in my school

But this holiday has been so annoying because I am not even in a routine and I don't know about waking up at like 9 without having one

[young fossil]

First of all: you shouldn’t be self diagnosing with PDA, as it sounds like you do. /info PDA isn’t just “demand avoidance” it’s so much more and it’s a really hard to live with. As I said before demand avoidance, to some degree, can be found in both autism and adhd.
Second: In some countries they screen for PDA when doing autism assessments as it’s most common occurring with ASD. However in many countries the knowledge of this condition is really low. It depends a lot on where you live.

Just a heads up that I don’t have PDA myself and this is from what I’ve read online and heard of.

You should check out atpeaceparents on Instagram if you want to learn more about PDA.

[steel pewter]

PDA isn’t a diagnosis

It’s neither in the ICD-11 nor the DSM-5

It’s basically just a set of behaviours that’s commonly exhibited together in a lot of autistic people

There is no way to get assessed for PDA

Wherever you got the idea that psychiatrist screen for PDA or that they have a diagnosis of PDA either misunderstood what actually goes on the papers or was plain misinformation

Also, atpeaceparents is not a medical organisation. It is point and simple most likely a scam organisation. The founder puts ‘PHD’ in their title despite the fact her PHD is neither medical nor child related and not a single person on their site calls themselves counsellors nor psychiatrists, they call themselves coaches. Life coaches need minimal qualifications to operate and those qualifications do not include a psychiatry degree. These people do not count as a trusted source

[young fossil]

Okay I didn’t know that. I’ve read that PDA is a profile of autism though, so you’re right about it not being a diagnosis.