DID/OSDD-1 System Chat

[hollow orchid]

I'm sorry :C

[peak sierra]

Oh, yikes.
We are in a highly religious shelter rn.

[finite jackal]

I'm sorry to hear that 🥺

[timber gull]

oof

✨Unhinged Undead ✨ ↩️

[Reply to:](#1151243634876891246 message) Oh, yikes.
We are in a highly religious shelter rn.

I would need therapy everyday

[peak sierra]

So we get it. It’s not fun.
We have our first appointment with a psychiatrist on August 2nd
Believe someone mentioned the 5th but we rechecked and the 2nd was the date

[timber gull]

Help- why can I hear these people talking (Just Rhay but still)

[rapid plaza]

i think that’s john mulaney

[peak sierra]

Because communication ids fun? Hell if I know.

[timber gull]

We basically never have any. It's extremely rare

✨Unhinged Undead ✨ ↩️

[Reply to:](#1151243634876891246 message) Because communication ids fun? Hell if I know.

[peak sierra]

There’s a whole thing of boburnham quotes wrapped into 1 as an audio on System Tiktok

It was popular for a long while
“||Boom orange juice! That’s life! Now I’ve thrown him off his rhythm…||”

[hollow orchid]

Yeah, I'm religious, but still in the trauma /nav
(like in the place with the trauma)

[peak sierra]

I’m sorry. That must be hard and exhausting.

[hollow orchid]

It causes a lot of blurry, dissociative days due to it, but overall I'm fine. Thank you, though! /gen

[timber gull]

we quote that sm gn

✨Unhinged Undead ✨ ↩️

[Reply to:](#1151243634876891246 message) It was popular for a long while
“||Boom orange juice! That’s life! Now I’ve thrown him off his rhyth||…

Dis bitch. I just feel like saying that actually. I'm gay

😭

[hollow orchid]

I should use pluralkit. Mb talk my sys into using it for proxies. idk

[peak sierra]

We… don’t recall much of our ||church|| days. No one really knows why, as there wasn’t really anything traumatic there, maybe stressful but not traumatic. Though we do recall liking to sing and also getting locked in the bathroom 3 times accidentally.

Faulty door

[timber gull]

If that works for most of you then you could try. Not everyone has to use it and you can slowly make it by making one for whoever is fronting

Duck Lord (pls @ reply) ↩️

[Reply to:](#1151243634876891246 message) I should use pluralkit. Mb talk my sys into using it for proxies. idk

[peak sierra]

Pfffft apparently some of us like it a lot.

[hollow orchid]

Hopefully. The times in which we had pluralkit, it got deleted by a system member! /lh /nav

[peak sierra]

If you feel like it, go ahead! : >

[timber gull]

Oh wow

Duck Lord (pls @ reply) ↩️

[Reply to:](#1151243634876891246 message) Hopefully. The times in which we had pluralkit, it got deleted by a system member! /lh /nav

Pk is very helpful :)

Ohh makes sense. With SP you can transport and can always sign in again

Duck Lord (pls @ reply) ↩️

[Reply to:](#1151243634876891246 message) Hopefully. The times in which we had pluralkit, it got deleted by a system member! /lh /nav

ack its not updating my pfp

[peak sierra]

Yeesh. Understandable though

Maybe need to restart?

[hollow orchid]

I do got simply plural on a website version (parents can see what I download)

[timber gull]

back lmao

ew gay ppl (we are dating)

[⚔] Blake - He/Doc [🥀] ↩️

[Reply to:](#1151243634876891246 message) ack its not updating my pfp

gotchaa

Duck Lord (pls @ reply) ↩️

[Reply to:](#1151243634876891246 message) I do got simply plural on a website version (parents can see what I download)

[hollow orchid]

Yeahhh

[timber gull]

love you too xD

🗡 — GAIL ! THEY / ANY — 🎬 ⋆ . ↩️

[Reply to:](#1151243634876891246 message) ew gay ppl (we are dating) 📎

I mean eeeww /j

loll

Fr. Them guys just weird tbh
(Gay af)

🗡 — GAIL ! THEY / ANY — 🎬 ⋆ . ↩️

[Reply to:](#1151243634876891246 message) ew gay ppl (we are dating) 📎

Lmaooo

Rhaydar | He/they 🎶 ↩️

[Reply to:](#1151243634876891246 message) Fr. Them guys just weird tbh
(Gay af) 📎

[peak sierra]

Ah, overbearing I take it? I hate it when parental figures or anyone does that.

[hollow orchid]

Yeahh

[peak sierra]

Gays?! No way!! They mustn’t exist! /j-lh

[timber gull]

Can't you export it on the website?

Duck Lord (pls @ reply) ↩️

[Reply to:](#1151243634876891246 message) Yeahh

XD

✨Unhinged Undead ✨ ↩️

[Reply to:](#1151243634876891246 message) Gays?! No way!! They mustn’t exist! /j-lh

pff we love making those jokes, being like "gAy pEoPle iS a sIn" to each other

✨Unhinged Undead ✨ ↩️

[Reply to:](#1151243634876891246 message) Gays?! No way!! They mustn’t exist! /j-lh

oh yeah lolol

🗡 — GAIL ! THEY / ANY — 🎬 ⋆ . ↩️

[Reply to:](#1151243634876891246 message) pff we love making those jokes, being like "gAy pEoPle iS a sIn" to each other 📎

[hollow orchid]

I think so, yea

[timber gull]

Then that works

Duck Lord (pls @ reply) ↩️

[Reply to:](#1151243634876891246 message) I think so, yea

[peak sierra]

Pffft hahahaha
Yeah it’s fun when you yourself are gay too.
So much more fun.

[timber gull]

Real

✨Unhinged Undead ✨ ↩️

[Reply to:](#1151243634876891246 message) Pffft hahahaha
Yeah it’s fun when you yourself are gay too.
So much more fun.

100% and it makes it just okay to do🤣

My nephew just grabbed my finger and it made so many cracks and pops-

oh wow

[peak sierra]

Oop..
Rip fingers 💀
Happens with our joints far too often. So much cracking.

[hollow orchid]

(Abt to get pluralkit again)

[timber gull]

Nice ^_^

Duck Lord (pls @ reply) ↩️

[Reply to:](#1151243634876891246 message) (Abt to get pluralkit again)

Fr and the doctor that's apparently a psychiatrist I saw said my joints are completely fine

✨Unhinged Undead ✨ ↩️

[Reply to:](#1151243634876891246 message) Oop..
Rip fingers 💀
Happens with our joints far too often. So much cracking.

Noise

Duck Lord (pls @ reply) ↩️

[Reply to:](#1151243634876891246 message) (Abt to get pluralkit again)

Yay!!!! M so happys for you!!

we're working on finishing our simply plural finally

Omg we did ours and its soooooo nice. I must say I did a good job-

🗡 — GAIL ! THEY / ANY — 🎬 ⋆ . ↩️

[Reply to:](#1151243634876891246 message) we're working on finishing our simply plural finally

The_Orchestra_System if anyone wants to add us

Super good job!!!!!

🗡 — GAIL ! THEY / ANY — 🎬 ⋆ . ↩️

[Reply to:](#1151243634876891246 message) we're working on finishing our simply plural finally

I’m good but thank you

Mara | Any prns 🎶 ↩️

[Reply to:](#1151243634876891246 message) The_Orchestra_System if anyone wants to add us

Nicenice

Mara | Any prns 🎶 ↩️

[Reply to:](#1151243634876891246 message) Omg we did ours and its soooooo nice. I must say I did a good job- 📎

Not specifically for you /nbr/lh

[⚔] Blake - He/Doc [🥀] ↩️

[Reply to:](#1151243634876891246 message) I’m good but thank you 📎

[peak sierra]

I think we have to edit ours. Someone says they’ll do it in a day or so.

[timber gull]

Yeah, we realized that we need to update ours

[peak sierra]

Though they edited it last night and took out those who ‘didn’t exist’? Whatever that means

[timber gull]

🤷

we updated simply plural today. or finished updating parts of it.

Yay!

i like this one.

(was gonna do individual ones for the neopronouns, but it felt weird because nobody uses the same neos so-)

(they’d just have their own section.)

oh!

maisie says, “i think we’ve said this before, but music and singing is really helpful to stay in front.”

That's really cool!

they didn’t say earlier, but was going to, but didn’t so. uhm. saying it now.

yeeee!

Phoebe +{She/They] { 📜 } ↩️

[Reply to:](#1151243634876891246 message) That's really cool!

Thanks! We'll try that! /gen

blur | emery, ryn, nova | 🫧💫 ↩️

[Reply to:](#1151243634876891246 message) maisie says, “i think we’ve said this before, but music and singing is really helpful to stay in fro…

[peak sierra]

MatPat
Was in
The Your Lie In April irl adaption…. I…. What

[civic iron]

I'm sorry this is such a late reply but oh my gosh ghost and pals /vpos

[timber gull]

I know lol I just wanted to acknowledge that I was just declining the offer that was made to everyone I presume

Mara | Any prns 🎶 ↩️

[Reply to:](#1151243634876891246 message) Not specifically for you /nbr/lh 📎

[peak sierra]

Yeah! Lol

[fading path]

blue hair and pronouns lets goooooooo

[peak sierra]

Pfft yessss

I’m not sure on pronouns. Idk what I am.

[fading path]

you are hereby a goose 🪿

i've decided for u

ur welcome

[peak sierra]

A silly willy goose. 😜 XD

Hahaha

[fading path]

yes XD

very very silly

[peak sierra]

Honk Honk!~

[peak sierra]

Ever just feel randomly emotional for no reason?
Gotta love emotional flashbacks.
They just come from nowhere heh. /NaV

Just perpetually confused

[hollow orchid]

I'm really sorry about that!

[peak sierra]

Thank you, however not your fault at all. No ones really. Just, life, maybe? /lh-unsure

[timber gull]

i’m 75% sure i already asked this- but i can’t remember what people said or when i asked- so-

what do you use a system journal for? /genq

[midnight drift]

Anything you want really. It's not something every system does because not everyone finds it helpful as internal communication is almost always easier

I personally use it for notes, important information, messages ect that I need to know that someone/all to the system will definitely hear/see.

Also pretty good if I'm thinking/feeling something or have a question that I think someone in my system may want to respond to but they aren't around at that exact second

The rest of my system tends to leave me notes on things that need to be done to make sure amnesia doesn't yeet it (i.e. meet ups, appointments, important info)

The journal (at least for my system) can be used by anyone for anything but that's just how we use it.

A friend of mine uses theirs like a daily diary so everyone is aware of what has happend and any upcoming events. Some use it as a venting space

It's whatever you feel is useful

[timber gull]

i don’t. journal. at all. or keep a diary- or anything- so. uhm. probably wouldn’t use a journal- but like. i have so many notebooks. 😭

i might. find. a notebook.

[midnight drift]

I'd argue to be extremely careful doing it without professional guidance. You will hear a lot of people telling you to reach out to your system and just push and push and push for communication on paper/in notes but that can be incredibly destabilising, especially to the host

Internal communication is often easier and more valuable.

If course I'm not saying DON'T use a journal - because I do and find it helpful. But it is not the only way to communicate to your system

[finite jackal]

We use a journal as well and we find it very helpful as well

Our therapist encourages us to keep using it and it really helps :)

I have a question btw, is it normal for the system to not really have anyone front, like at all but everyone is more comfortable with texting, writing and staying online? Like, my date friend is dating two other alters plus myself (the host, L), and no one fronts pretty much (i think that im subconsciously holding everyone back without realizing it; my therapist and our partner thinks this as well)

Everyone in the system (well almost everyone) feels more comfortable that way and idk if that's normal

Sorry for all the rambling ;u; 👉👈 /nfta

[weak basin]

GG @finite jackal, you just advanced to level 9!

[midnight drift]

Sounds an awful lot like how my system used to function. I don't think there's any "normal" way for a system to function, you just find whatever works

Or not.. but yk

[finite jackal]

Interesting :) thank you so much! I really appreciate it 😁

We're trying to find what works especially for our partner, because she wants to interact more with Pine and Cherry more like besides through text

We're definitely working on it but we really appreciate your response, Alex :) thank you /vvvvgen /vvvvpos

[midnight drift]

Yeah ofc. For us personally my system tends to get locked out so relationships kinda don't work for us but we're also actively healing a lot of very recent trauma so that may change

[finite jackal]

I see, I see

That's very valid and we're happy about your healing :) and sorry to hear about the recent trauma

We had also experienced recent trauma and still trying to get over it, slowly but surely we'll eventually get over this

We got this! You and me both!😁 You're doing great ^u^ /vvvvgen /vvvvpos

[midnight drift]

For sure. It's a process but everyone handles everything differently

For example my system is collectively asexual and many of us and minors so relationships are different or off the table all together

I think if you are comfortable and functioning well I don't see a reason to change how you guys work

[finite jackal]

That's fair :) and you're doing well

Valid valid, yeah minors in our system don't do relationships and Kiara is AroAce, so no relationship for them either. They're not interested in that

That's true, I definitely need to stop expecting our system to be like everyone else because it doesn't work like that

I'm bad at words, I hope that didn't sound rude or anything 🥲

[timber gull]

Thats so valid (I have no idea what the conv is about but I saw this message)

Our system has a range of ages and the minors absolutely do not date for obvious reasons😭

And theres some in our system who isn’t interested in dating someone in our PS or whatever. Some of them are aroace (Funny enough our Alastor is aroace, sweetest guy ever)

But yee :3

Alex [Bug] - @ping me! ↩️

[Reply to:](#1151243634876891246 message) For sure. It's a process but everyone handles everything differently

For example my system is coll…

Alex dates. Sparingly. I have no interest, humans are strange. The children are kept safe, they will never be hurt again.

[⚔] Blake - He/Doc [🥀] ↩️

[Reply to:](#1151243634876891246 message) Thats so valid (I have no idea what the conv is about but I saw this message)

Our system has a rang… 📎

I agree ^_^ There’s the basic things that some system do and everything but for the most part all systems are different! :D

Alex [Bug] - @ping me! ↩️

[Reply to:](#1151243634876891246 message) Sounds an awful lot like how my system used to function. I don't think there's any "normal" way for …

Mhm and thats so valid I can understand that. Yeah we keep’em safe too.

Zero | He/Void | ✨ ↩️

[Reply to:](#1151243634876891246 message) Alex dates. Sparingly. I have no interest, humans are strange. The children are kept safe, they will… 📎

Alastor.. interesting person. /neu

I'm sure he is wonderful.

This body exhausts me.

Yeah no valid😭 Hes 100% source separated and hes genuinely very sweet, he helps with task management and helps the system

Zero | He/Void | ✨ ↩️

[Reply to:](#1151243634876891246 message) Alastor.. interesting person. /neu

We do not judge sources. I am an introject as are many of our... Workers? They are people, not characters.

100% 😌👍 Just wanted to clarify just in case. We are an introject heavy system so I totally get that. I, myself, am not one but I can understand those who are

We.. used to not be. I'm not certain what happened, Alex stopped keeping track of everything.

It possibly got too much for him.

Understandable

He is stood with me.

It is strange he is so close but I cannot speak with him

Oh damn

Hm. I will note it down.

Thats a good idea ^_^

[timber gull]

morning guys

gm

how is everyone today I'm making coffee and relaxing

[finite jackal]

Morning :3

[timber gull]

good good!

Astrid 🍪 ↩️

[Reply to:](#1151243634876891246 message) how is everyone today I'm making coffee and relaxing

relaxing, excited for our first day at work tomorrow at our new job

our caretakers are very excited to work at a daycare ahaha

i’m drawing. that’s how i am. 👍

well drawing is fun so W

[timber gull]

Hiii

At ||church|| cfc

[timber gull]

We're coll. asexual as well👍

Alex [Bug] - @ping me! ↩️

[Reply to:](#1151243634876891246 message) For sure. It's a process but everyone handles everything differently

For example my system is coll…

[timber gull]

aww that is good. I love caring for the three littles of our system. It's so rewarding seeing them smile and hearing them laugh

[⚔] Blake - He/Doc [🥀] ↩️

[Reply to:](#1151243634876891246 message) our caretakers are very excited to work at a daycare ahaha

[peak sierra]

How is everyone?

[heady hornet]

Okay

Cw: Bug
Found a ladybug

[timber gull]

ok kinda. Trying to take care of the system. Got some water and food in us and now just working on mental relaxation

[peak sierra]

Woah! Cool!

We had loads back in our childhood yard.

It was neat!

[heady hornet]

I'm scared of them lol. I moved after

[peak sierra]

Oh dang. Hope it was alright after.

[heady hornet]

Yea m fine

Not as scared as I used to be

Showed my best friend and he named the exact species 😭

[peak sierra]

That’s cool! He must know a lot. /pos
Learning new things is most times fun. Even if the topic is scary.

[peak sierra]

Ooooo

That’s cool!

He must love ACNH.

[heady hornet]

[coral flint]

Omg that emoji is adorable

[finite jackal]

henlo :3

[timber gull]

hello how are you. We have just been going threw the motions today but might go play pool later to at least do something for the day

Hello.

hi

[heady hornet]

Thnx it's from another server and that server has a bunch of cute emojis

[weak basin]

GG @heady hornet, you just advanced to level 7!

[heady hornet]

||Also I need someone who's good with relationship advice 😭 || /ot and don't know where to put it. It's asking for advice

[timber gull]

Hello all.

[finite jackal]

Hello, I'm not so good rn tbh (having extreme chronic pain), but we'll be okay 🥹 and oh I see! Valid valid :) I hope you have a good rest of your day /vgen /vpos

[peak sierra]

Depending.

I may be able to

[heady hornet]

May I dm? Or I can say it here. Whatever works

[peak sierra]

Don’t matter but maybe dms do it doesn’t clog the chat?

But up to you

You can also make a health forum for it I believe

[timber gull]

If you still need some help we would be okay with helping. /nf

🌸 Orchestra • System 🎶 ↩️

[Reply to:](#1151243634876891246 message) ||Also I need someone who's good with relationship advice 😭 || /ot and don't know where to put it. …

hope you feel better soon

StarriiBunnii 🌌🪐🐰 ↩️

[Reply to:](#1151243634876891246 message) Hello, I'm not so good rn tbh (having extreme chronic pain), but we'll be okay 🥹 and oh I see! Vali…

[finite jackal]

thank you

[heady hornet]

Sure what's your base?

[timber gull]

My what?

🌸 Orchestra • System 🎶 ↩️

[Reply to:](#1151243634876891246 message) Sure what's your base?

Oh, RoseSystem

[hybrid skiff]

\ Ah

[timber gull]

There you go

We can be added too if wished.

[digital abyss]

\ Base.

[heady hornet]

Sure to both

[timber gull]

I can also be added, Im just chill with whatever

[hollow orchid]

\ Base

[faint mason]

i hate not being able to handle physical pain well. the protectors are going crazy but it was just a dumb slip up that caused it

they’re freaking out the littles because they’re panicking and i’m sobbing in pain. none of this is helpful

sorry i don’t mean to vent i’m probably rambling

[heady hornet]

S over s okay but thanks

[wintry trellis]

I hate the blacking out part of this. I don't remember whole days.

[fading path]

we feel this way too

[timber gull]

very off topic but yesterday i saw online (don't know if true or not or anything) that amnesia can be caused by suppressing emotions. i find this very interesting actually

[hollow orchid]

\ That would make a lot of sense for us

[finite jackal]

Valid

[timber gull]

to us too! i found myself a lot in this phrase lmao

Duck Lord (pls @ reply) {📜} ↩️

[Reply to:](#1151243634876891246 message) \ That would make a lot of sense for us

[coral flint]

Ohh god I think I gotta think about some things lmao

[hybrid skiff]

interesting! makes sense!

[digital abyss]

oops

twas sending a gif

but it said "I pretend my eyes are closed"

because that will make me rethink my entire life LOL

[peak sierra]

It’s not fun at all. I’m sorry

[digital abyss]

Agreed. It's been a while since I fully fronted and it's almost August. Yikes.

[wintry trellis]

This is random but anybody else have autism or ADHD or something and it affects different altera differently

[heavy steppe]

Yes me

[wintry trellis]

Ok. Just not me then

[peak sierra]

Yes. Our disabilities impact each other differently

[timber gull]

i never really thought about it, but certain alters experience different sensory issues and some are more sensitive sensory wise than others. some are more hyperactive than others but that could be personality.

[timber gull]

there’s 7 people in front omg

[timber gull]

this is a weird question-

but is it possible for some alters to experience more awareness of things like needing to eat?

we had one front, and realised we needed food because they complained. nobody else (9 in total on and off) realised we were, in fact, hungry.

[digital abyss]

Yes, very common. Some of us feel pain more

[timber gull]

ok, thank you!

ToothVoid — 🎬 ⋆ . ↩️

[Reply to:](#1151243634876891246 message) Yes, very common. Some of us feel pain more

[peak sierra]

Yes they can have certain roles for that too

[timber gull]

i seriously doubt that’s the case for this specific alter /lh

✨Unhinged Undead ✨ ↩️

[Reply to:](#1151243634876891246 message) Yes they can have certain roles for that too

[midnight drift]

Yeah experiencing sensations differently is common

A lot of Kai's job, for example, is to feel pain more severely than anyone else. He's super sensitive so when he's co con he will nag me to sit down

[urban sage]

guyssss i got so many fictives from hasbin hotel now that i have finished it 😦

[timber gull]

??

huh

sorry i dont understand

[hybrid skiff]

???

You got alters from it just by finishing it?🤨

idk if thats something to brag about either😭 /lh

[urban sage]

I was not bragging about it

i was

sad

there is a certain way perople can come into my headspcae and so there have been there for a while since the split. but my gatekeeper didn't let them in untill now

[urban sage]

sorry if it seemed like i was bragging

i am not happy about this

[timber gull]

nono i didnt take it as that either

just

confused

[urban sage]

i see

[timber gull]

it takes upwards of weeks for alters to fully form

🧍

gotcha I was just confused

and there has to be active stress

im no doctor but i will not lie

the way you described it felt

wrong

thats all

yeah tis why I was confused by the statement but I can understand what you mean

i may just be too autistic /cj

shrugs

not my place either

just beyond confused is all

[urban sage]

I have an anxitey disorder and i happen to otherthink things very often and there is a lot happing in my life rn

[weak basin]

GG @urban sage, you just advanced to level 3!

[timber gull]

valid twas just confused

(me too btw)

shrugs idunno

i was just confused thats all

nothing more or less

mhm

[peak sierra]

I agree. It did feel off
As usually you cannot pick and choose alters that are formed. And usually there would have to be a reason they formed in the first place. So you are right to worry bout stuff like that.

[heady hornet]

I agree

Now speaking of which we split really easily. Anxiety (constant for a whole day at least) causes splits, shouting, mention of certain triggers, meltdown, feeling mistreated so basically the normal stuff but more easily

[heavy steppe]

I have noticed at times of exatreamly stress my chances of switching super fast between system mates is off the charts

[peak sierra]

Yeah, makes a lot of sense.

What stress can do…

[heady hornet]

Fr

No fun at all

[peak sierra]

Nope, not at all.

[timber gull]

Mhm

[hollow orchid]

Yup

[heavy steppe]

amnisia is extra high tonight

[timber gull]

Yeah high split tolerance is a thing ofc, its disorienting though. The ability to confidently identify alters only less than a little bit after you finished a show is.. a red flag to us. Don't get me wrong, we have introjects-- and some of media. But they are there for a VERY specific reason, just like any alter. Most introjects are there because of a specific trauma holding purpose, or to where the story or what not of a character introject resognates intensly with the experience. For example, there's an introject we have of an OC from a laboratory, and they hold onto pseudomemories of it, or as some call "source memories", but it's in correlation to medical trauma.

That's just my personal opinion, and it did come off uncomfortably nonchalant. We have recently discovered system stuff in our adulthood though, so I may be incorrect on stuff in which please let me know. This is just coming from what I've learned in therapy, where I discovered it.

[heady hornet]

We only have one introject

[timber gull]

yee

Adding on, the introject is younger as well so it’s more helpful for them to cope w/ relating to what they resonate with— rather than old hurtful coping mechanisms. They are fully aware they are not that character and it isn’t a real thing just fictional just thought I’d add on.

🗡 — GAIL ! THEY / ANY — 🎬 ⋆ . ↩️

[Reply to:](#1151243634876891246 message) Yeah high split tolerance is a thing ofc, its disorienting though. The ability to confidently identi…

[heavy steppe]

wish io had a theropist to talk about and meet m,y alters but its still in the trying to get one faze

[timber gull]

We haven’t talked to her about the alters in specifics since we aren’t ready— but she is open to it. We just work on the trauma through it.

[heavy steppe]

i want to tell one about it. I almost got to tell my old one about them and she really wanted to meet them but she quit

[heady hornet]

Mine met the Co-host today

[digital abyss]

Mine?

[heady hornet]

Psychologist

[peak sierra]

Cool!

[hollow orchid]

I unfortunately do not have access to a psychologist. /nav -dunno whos fronting (not host though)

[digital abyss]

Oh!! cool :]

(sorry for the ping aa)

[heady hornet]

It's okay, no worries

[heady hornet]

Yea

[finite jackal]

Does anyone else ever have times where it's super quiet in headspace and then they just sorta appear outta nowhere at random? Or is it just me? /gq /nfta

[coral flint]

We absolutely experience this

[finite jackal]

Interesting! :0 /vgen

Idk why this happens 😅 /lh

Glad to know I'm not the only one lol

[coral flint]

Yippee

[finite jackal]

:3

Wait- was that sarcastic or genuine or lighthearted? :0 /gq /nfta

[coral flint]

/gen and /lh (:

[finite jackal]

Okie :D hehehe

You seem very cool btw :) /vgen /vpos /p

[timber gull]

Us 99% of the time because headspace is inaccessible unless in it. And the memories of headspace vanish when we are in front

StarriiBunnii 🌌🪐🐰 ↩️

[Reply to:](#1151243634876891246 message) Does anyone else ever have times where it's super quiet in headspace and then they just sorta appear…

[finite jackal]

Interesting! /vgen

[heavy steppe]

Yes my girls do that

[timber gull]

we’re normally quite quiet. at the moment, i’ve been in front with ryn a lot and i tend to stay silent most of the time. it’s disorienting when it’s loud. /nav

StarriiBunnii 🌌🪐🐰 ↩️

[Reply to:](#1151243634876891246 message) Does anyone else ever have times where it's super quiet in headspace and then they just sorta appear…

[digital abyss]

all the heckin time

visualizatiom is already difficult-- esp with someone with anphantasia (is fhat what its called?) so auditorial comes woth it a lot

[timber gull]

aphantasia. :D

ToothVoid — 🎬 ⋆ . ↩️

[Reply to:](#1151243634876891246 message) visualizatiom is already difficult-- esp with someone with anphantasia (is fhat what its called?) so…

[digital abyss]

tyty

the thingy where u cant visualize

[timber gull]

yes.

that thingy.

[digital abyss]

which is funny, coming from a system who is an artist

[timber gull]

sameeee.

[digital abyss]

yeee

[timber gull]

wooooo. so fun.

[digital abyss]

"if u canf visualize how can you draw poses??" idk muscle memory or something

[timber gull]

✨references✨

[digital abyss]

but whats more strange is certain alters do NOT deal with it and can visualize

[timber gull]

the difference between my art with no references and with references is. interesting.

WOAH. interesting.

ToothVoid — 🎬 ⋆ . ↩️

[Reply to:](#1151243634876891246 message) but whats more strange is certain alters do NOT deal with it and can visualize

[digital abyss]

which gets beyond weird for me-- someone who cant visualize headspace if theyre co con i see it its like seeing a new color

we have this one drawing of an instance of that and its basically every time

zero drew it

[timber gull]

i did. an. animation. of. what. words- 😭

words stopped.

[digital abyss]

ya i feel ya

editing is just "oh that looks cool lets add that"

i edited zara longg ago but it got taken down for copyright

but she saw it before it got taken down so thats nice

[timber gull]

Ty!! You seem really cool too :D

StarriiBunnii 🌌🪐🐰 ↩️

[Reply to:](#1151243634876891246 message) You seem very cool btw :) /vgen /vpos /p

[finite jackal]

You're so welcome! :DD

Thank you so much!! ^u^ /vpos /vgen

[finite jackal]

I see, valid /vgen

[finite jackal]

Valid /vgen

[finite jackal]

Valid /vgen

[heady hornet]

Same

[finite jackal]

Hi Orchestra System :) your system name is so cool and pretty sounding! /vgen /vpos /p

[hollow orchid]

Yup, we experience this!!

[finite jackal]

That's so fascinating! I really wondered if it was just me 🥹 /lh /gen

[hollow orchid]

It's completely valid!! : D /vvgen

[finite jackal]

Thank you so much!!! 🥹 /vvvgen

[hollow orchid]

:)) Ofc!! /gen

[finite jackal]

:DD

[timber gull]

Anyone else feel stuff that you don't have? Like certain limbs that you know don't exist on the body but you feel its presence? /gq

[finite jackal]

Yesss! Omg yes, all my life! /vgen /lh

[timber gull]

Oh, good! I'm not the only one! /gen

[finite jackal]

Hehe yep^^ you're completely valid! /vgen

[heavy steppe]

yes almost like someone is touhing me

[timber gull]

Yeah, that's kind of how it feels like for me

*right now

[finite jackal]

Valid :)

[timber gull]

: )

[midnight drift]

Yuppers
Had it more when I was younger (possibly different host) but I could/can "summon" stuff

[timber gull]

Oh, I understand

[peak sierra]

Yes! They are commonly known as Phantom Limbs.

Whether medical or metaphysical, they are called Phantom Limbs.
I as host and nonhuman shifter I feel them a lot.

[timber gull]

Oh, thank you! We have a few nonhuman alters, and we generally have phantom limbs and massive dysphoria.

[peak sierra]

Same here! Recently fixed an oc of ours to look like me. It was hard but rather affirming.

[timber gull]

Awesome!

[peak sierra]

I think I formed again cause we got intensely focused on our OC at the time I was experiencing traumatic things in the past so I think I might’ve attached to it a bit too much. Only realized through phantom limbs.

[timber gull]

Ah, I see

[hybrid skiff]

yup lmao either its super quiet or super loud LOL

[finite jackal]

LOL Oh wow

[hybrid skiff]

phantom limb ^_^ our therians and animal/creatures feel that

[hybrid skiff]

oh haha you got it before me lolol

[timber gull]

When you're talking to someone and then a switch happens.

[peak sierra]

Pffft that’s me currently. Got talking to someone and dissociated twice. Which isn’t normal actually.

[timber gull]

Yeah, same.

Does anyone know how to make a good system/ alter intro?

[heady hornet]

Ty

[timber gull]

do you want our system intro as an example? /nf

Phoebe +{She/They] { 📜 } ↩️

[Reply to:](#1151243634876891246 message) Does anyone know how to make a good system/ alter intro?

wow carson is- strong- in influence- /lh

Yes please! We're not good at making things to be honest, and love using references and examples. Thank you! /gen

i dunno what ours looks like one second-

I get that!

[ember vessel]

pk;s

[faint solstice]

polkadot

Tag

🫧💫

Color

#c69ff9

Linked accounts

rynfizz (@ember vessel)

Members (26)

(see pk;system nungo list or pk;system nungo list full)

Description

the popcorn council will see you now!

🫧 bodily 17 | 🏴󠁧󠁢󠁳󠁣󠁴󠁿 | 🏳️‍🌈🏳️‍⚧️
💫 please ASK before sending us a friend request, follow or DM.
🫧 questioning system, in denial.
💫 hosted by ryn.

-+- proxy and fronting information! -+-

the proxy being used is the alter who is fronting/talking.

because sometimes it’s harder to tell, we have 3 other proxies:
🫧 the blurry, blendy and unsure proxies.

the blurry proxy:
💫 most likely 1 alter mainly fronting while others are influencing.

the blendy proxy:
🫧 multiple alters are blending together. we are unsure of who is actually in front.

the unsure proxy:
💫 1 alter is fronting but is unsure of who they are.

please remember that while ryn fronts the most often, they aren’t always the one who is using these proxies.

-+- other! -+-

simply plural - rynfizz

• for more information.

thank you for reading!

System ID: nungo | Created on 2023-12-01 19:55:55 UTC

[timber gull]

other people do boundaries and things.

Oh, thank you! /vvvgen

we have. separate boundaries. for. each one. because. we haven’t like. decided. on a group boundary thing-

words.

are very much. wording.

I totally understand that!
And yes, words are very hard!

i don’t really know what to put like. otherwise.

[finite jackal]

You're welcome :)

[peak sierra]

I’m unsure if I should show the art of me. I want to but I get…. nervous.

We also need to redo our sys intro. I’m not even sure what it is.

Maybe I’ll do that tonight. ;-;

[fading path]

Hmmm i'd love to see :) /g /nf

[heady hornet]

I wanna see!!

[timber gull]

Same here! /nf /g

I'm curios but you don't have to if you don't want to!! /gen

[hollow orchid]

\ We finally did it!

[hollow orchid]

\ We also started making a base for alter intros : )

[timber gull]

you see. i. would do that- but then it feels like too much effort. even though there’s not a lot of us-

I get that! We're just bored. 😭

it’s uhm. like. past half 2 in the morning for me so…. i should sleep-

random thing before i sleep - is it normal to be really scared of fusing with other alters? probably is.. splits should theoretically concern and scare me more but fusing kinda terrifies me- /lh

I think that's normal

ryn | ask prns | 🫧💫 ↩️

[Reply to:](#1151243634876891246 message) random thing before i sleep - is it normal to be really scared of fusing with other alters? probably…

[heady hornet]

Normal!

[timber gull]

Yep.

[peak sierra]

I am a Vesper, I have talked about this loads, maybe, in the past, I think?
I believe we have a layer in headspace with those of my species too. Unsure though. Never met any.

I have 4 eyes. Oops I should probably have censored

Our oc is different coloured and has 3 eyes and ear fluff.
But I kinda took on the other traits from it but with a twist.

I have Bat wings too but they aren’t showing in the photo.
I have 3 claw like things called grabbers instead of hands.

But ye. Might edit the hair a bit but that’s accurate to the body’s current style. All I know is my hair is red/orange. Or a mix of the two.

@heady hornet @fading path
Oops forgot to ping you both

[heady hornet]

Oooo nice!!!!

[hollow orchid]

Ayy that's amazing!! /vvvvgen

[timber gull]

OOOO

✨Unhinged Undead ✨ ↩️

[Reply to:](#1151243634876891246 message) I am a Vesper, I have talked about this loads, maybe, in the past, I think?
I believe we have a laye… 📎

[peak sierra]

Thank you all ^^

I get a lot of phantom sensations of my eyes, nose, gems, and tail. Sometimes my size, or my grabbers and hind paws.

My Tail and Ears and nose and size are the most common.

My eye color probably most common.

[timber gull]

There’s an alter that one of the gatekeepers is trying to keep us from talking about or making a profile for even though we’re fully aware of xeir existence? It’s confusing and I’m not 100% sure why

[midnight drift]

Could be other reasons for it. Maybe gatekeepers aren't certai xeir behaviour would be safe, xei may have memories that gatekeepers don't want revealed ect

[timber gull]

Yeahh ok

Xey’re just a kid so it’s probably the memories one?

[finite jackal]

Same :DD /nf /vgen /vpos

[finite jackal]

That's interesting /vgen

In a way, that kinda reminds me of our protector, Kiara. She's been more hesitant with things lately- like even talking about things in therapy, she doesn't want me talking about our past. We don't judge them and neither does our therapist, but we are trying to work with them :)

I hope I didn't intrude or sound rude or offensive btw /vgen

[timber gull]

No you’re good! /gen (:

StarriiBunnii 🌌🪐🐰 ↩️

[Reply to:](#1151243634876891246 message) I hope I didn't intrude or sound rude or offensive btw /vgen

I like reading about similar experiences

[finite jackal]

Okie ;u; thank you so much hehehe /vgen

[weak basin]

GG @finite jackal, you just advanced to level 11!

[finite jackal]

Valid :) same here!

[heady hornet]

Our Gatekeeper just takes certain parts of a traumatic event away so I can remember the situation and why it was traumatic but with amnesia and the Gatekeeper taking memories I just can't remember details so it doesn't harm me much thinking of said traumatic event (the one I'm talking about is recent)

[heady hornet]

[digital abyss]

waves

[heady hornet]

[digital abyss]

fine and dandy ty

u?

[wintry trellis]

I'm very good. I am pretting a kitty

Petting

[heady hornet]

M good talking to gf and waiting for bf to show up lol

[peak sierra]

That’s generally how it goes. Then the next day or so I wasn’t able to remember it at all.

[heady hornet]

Yea

But for me little pieces

[timber gull]

valid!

[timber gull]

:)

[timber gull]

laughs and cries in "so introject heavy u hav zero clue if u r valid or not-" /nav /sortasilly -✨

[fading path]

fair

[fading path]

i don't know why but writing long things tends to make us feel super dissociated- (or might just be brain fog idk-)

it sucks cuz it totally makes it so much harder to write our long things in question

btw does anyone know if you can dissociate without trauma??

i'm pretty sure you can't but i just wanna make sure 😭

[fading path]

also does anyone know what the differences between brain fog, dissociation & derealization/depersonalization is?

sorry for so many questions 😭

[digital abyss]

yep! everyone dissociates, like if ur driving and your like “wow that went by fast”, its just when its to the extremity of every day and identity when its not normal yknow

[fading path]

ah okay thank u for the reply!! :D /g /pos

[midnight drift]

Yep! Not all dissociation is trauma response and not all dissociation is disordered. There is a spectrum of normality - DID is just the most severe form of dissociation (as it covers many categories)

[midnight drift]

Just had someone complain that someone else switched out and I came back in... Idk ouch?

Like I get it you were having a conversation but I don't know this person and it kinda feels like they just don't wanna talk to me :/

[timber gull]

ew- bad human- icky interaction.

[timber gull]

We are an introject heavy system and I know another one thats a very heavy introject system, its completely normal esp with neurodivergent (adhd or autistic) systems

✨Orbeez✨ ☾✨🦷💫☽ ↩️

[Reply to:](#1151243634876891246 message) laughs and cries in "so introject heavy u hav zero clue if u r valid or not-" /nav /sortasilly -✨

[timber gull]

having a really fun time right now. /s

it’s not that bad, but it’s quite annoying…

[timber gull]

ooff this does look crowded hopefully it will get better soon

it’s. kinda? better? i. think?? 😭 /lh

it’s been a lot worse-

there’s still. like. 4 of us near front but we can all identify ourselves better.. so that’s. good-

yeah that is a good start i am glad

[timber gull]

feeling figity as hell. All three littles are fighting to front

the stress is making my stomach hurt 😖

[timber gull]

So we just figured out that our host has a subsystem and we don't know how to handle it.. I'm the co-host and I still don't know what it means

[wintry trellis]

Take your time to process. No rush.

[finite jackal]

We're here for you /vgen /vpos /p

[hollow orchid]

\ Thank you, I'm just confused 😅

[heady hornet]

May I dm? /nf /lh

Ping reply

[timber gull]

I don't mind!

[heady hornet]

Okay

How u know if u have subsystem

[peak sierra]

Depends I guess. Think it has something to do with feeling more fragmented than normal or more different from other alters, in the sense of you have more dissociation, you often feel hollow inside your alter mind however it’d be called.
Feeling like you yourself are more complex, feeling like there’s other versions of you as an alter in your head.
Might be fragments, full alters, or holders of some things. Might even be able to see another headspace inside your own mind as an alter.
I myself am not a subsystem. -Killian

I think there’s a lot more to it but I’m not sure. -Killian

[heady hornet]

If it's that ^^ then I definitely need to do some research

Cause I experience a lot of that

[peak sierra]

Yeah, research your heart out, hope you can figure it out. -Killian

[timber gull]

updating picrews. :)

if anybody wants to guess who’s who- then feel free- /nf /sil

[finite jackal]

Amazing!!! 🤩 /vgen /vpos /p

[heady hornet]

Got lots of emojis that I can use with nitro!!

[midnight drift]

Sleepy 2am brain says first 2 are Adam and Maisie?

[heady hornet]

[timber gull]

yesss. well doneee. :)

Alex [Bug] - @ping me! ↩️

[Reply to:](#1151243634876891246 message) Sleepy 2am brain says first 2 are Adam and Maisie?

i love maisie’s one too much.

[weak basin]

GG @hollow orchid, you just advanced to level 16!

[timber gull]

When you randomly discover a trigger.

[civic iron]

FELT on saturday

[weak basin]

GG @civic iron, you just advanced to level 21!

[civic iron]

Yall doin alright though?

[timber gull]

Eh, still in our current living situation so could be worse tbh. At least we organized our system on pluralkit 😅

[peak sierra]

The nonhuman urge to scratch your ears like a dog…. /pos- but itchy

[hollow orchid]

\ Real, some of our nonhuman alters feel the same

[peak sierra]

I’m just agitated cause I want to do something today, I have energy today but nowhere to put it. That and I feel like exerting myself is a bad idea.
Running around on all fours would be super fun though. Used to often when I had a place and my cat.

[timber gull]

Ah, I gotchu

[wintry trellis]

Go on a run? Like in the forest

Short? Or spend mental energy

[digital abyss]

ive never related more what

[timber gull]

I'm making Kandi bracelets for each alter, so we can wear one for who ever is fronting! :D /vpos

It's so much fun ngl! :DD

[heavy steppe]

That is a great idea. I never thought of making something. It would be great to make one with letter beads for each alters name. Now I would love to do something like that. I already have a magnetic bracelet with my name on it my parents got me the year I graduated highschool

[peak sierra]

I wish. None nearby.
That and can’t really physically run. Takes a toll on the body.

[peak sierra]

Ooooo niceee

[timber gull]

Oo!! I love that idea!!

[peak sierra]

When there’s stress in headspace and a song plays really loud in the iw and the whole body relaxes.
(Song is the princess quest OST from FNAF SB)

[finite jackal]

Yes! That's what we're gonna be doing :DD It's convenient! /vpos

That's so awesome! You should so do it ^^ And oooh! A magnetic bracelet sounds awesome :3 /vvvgen /vvvvpos /p

[finite jackal]

Thank you so much!!! :D

[finite jackal]

Thankies thankiess ^^

[heavy steppe]

They got it from a special place near their house

[finite jackal]

Interesting :0 /vgen /pos

[heavy steppe]

True it's called mint julies

[finite jackal]

Ooh! I like that! That sounds really pretty ngl :) /vpos /vgen

[heavy steppe]

It is

[heady hornet]

Hiii

Made my server profile match the colour of the name cause it was bugging me 😄

Gonna change pfp though

Anyway

How is everyone?

[heavy steppe]

I am ok no ||Pshycogenic Non Epileptic Seizure|| so far which is good. My system is a bit over the place and my mood is content and I am drinking coffee

[timber gull]

i’m. tired and. drawing. system is. happy.. might be because i’m happy though-

[timber gull]

now in chaos lol

took an hour

[urban sage]

a lot of the charactera from the show have gone through what I have gone through and we have adhd so we get yperfixated on this and also very we split ery very easily because I have really big emotions. i am sorry. I am really worried that i am faking all this and hearing you guys saying that is was a red flag really scares me

[digital abyss]

shrugz not our place to decide we were jst pointing out information

[heady hornet]

Now that I'm reading this, you split just from watching it? Like nothing happened and just watching it caused the splits? /genq /nbr

[urban sage]

We didn't split from watching it. Our brain took those characters that we related to and then when we split took those characters and gave them jobs.
Sorry does that make sense

We also split really really easily

So that doesn't help

[heady hornet]

Um oh- okay
Never heard of that happening but we don't get introjects a lot cause don't hyperfixate much so imma just keep my mouth shut (not invalidating anyone btw. I genuinely just don't know anything about this specific topic)

[urban sage]

It's okay. I have adhd so I get hyperfixations really easily also this is just the way our system works. Every system is different

I am just worried that this shit that I am going through isn't real and so someone saying that really scares me

[heady hornet]

Understandable

[timber gull]

not necessarily saying that i’ve just never heard of that happening, and from typical experiences of seeing a bunch of new alters show up after watching a tv show or getting fixated, it does give off red flag energy. not introject heavy here, but have quite a few. each of them took a long time to develop, and cant know 100% right away, just as any developing alter. idk if thats correct but its what i know from medical professionals, my experience, and other diagnosed system experiences.

Blooptheduckdestroyer ↩️

[Reply to:](#1151243634876891246 message) I am just worried that this shit that I am going through isn't real and so someone saying that reall…

the “thats weird” for us is not the introjects themselves, but the knowing who they are and their system roles within a day / days after showing up and splitting. splitting is disorienting, identity lose is the core of the disorder. i dont know. just going off of experiences n stuff and what doctors have said and therapy n shi

ive never heard that reason either,,

🌱 Orchestra • System 🎶 ↩️

[Reply to:](#1151243634876891246 message) Um oh- okay
Never heard of that happening but we don't get introjects a lot cause don't hyperfixate…

[hollow orchid]

How do you deal with vocal dysphoria for certain alters? Like we're bodily afab, but we have some masc alters who don't like the body's voice/ the voice doesn't feel right to them.

[faint mason]

we only have one male alter but he just tends to try and drop our voice more than usual when he’s in front and avoids looking in mirrors

ope sorry ^ @hollow orchid

there’s tutorials and stuff on youtube for ftm people but luckily we have a pretty variable voice range so he can do it easier

[hollow orchid]

Thank you!

[midnight drift]

To add another perspective;

Might not realise you were splitting so it appears faster than it was? Depending on the situation you can split pretty fast so if you were already splitting your brain might just latch onto media

I've had it happen where it seems like alters pop out of nowhere or form super super fast but in retrospect I can see where the split started without me noticing

Takes a lot of time and work to be fluent with your system and even then it's not possible to know everything going on all the time

[digital abyss]

that is true, its a confusing disorder and every system is different

[timber gull]

random thought question - can you have introjects from OC’s you’ve made? /genq

like i assume so.. but.. i wanna ask-

[hollow orchid]

Yup! Our gatekeeper, Mira, happens to be one

[timber gull]

ok thank you. i was like- surely- but wanted to ask- so i did- and you answered- so woo- :)

Duck Lord (pls @ reply) {📜} ↩️

[Reply to:](#1151243634876891246 message) Yup! Our gatekeeper, Mira, happens to be one

[hollow orchid]

Yay! :D

[heady hornet]

[weak basin]

GG @heady hornet, you just advanced to level 8!

[heady hornet]

[timber gull]

I find it kinda funny that I now have an extra job of “interacting with the person the protectors hate”

[ebon shell]

that's actually pretty funny

[timber gull]

Yeah lol

[timber gull]

thats so funny and for what

Ari-they/pup/stripe ||BIRDS ↩️

[Reply to:](#1151243634876891246 message) I find it kinda funny that I now have an extra job of “interacting with the person the protectors ha…

there are so many ppl fronting im gonna cry this is aids

[timber gull]

what even is this

the diamonds are custom fronts not ppl

people pleaser shit or something idk

❓ — CHAOS ! HE / THEY — 🎬 ⋆ . ↩️

[Reply to:](#1151243634876891246 message) thats so funny and for what 📎

giggling

Kayden-he/him ||BIRDS ↩️

[Reply to:](#1151243634876891246 message) people pleaser shit or something idk 📎

being a system is fucking awful but at least there are some funny quotes? idk

[hollow orchid]

The quotes thing is so true

[timber gull]

this happened today for ref

two persecutors

[tight flax]

Hhhh

[timber gull]

when you split hard, and then pops out new staff. so, olds here, are under the new-ones. hell yeah i like it /sarc /lh

also, yesterday night we were switchy while talking to our FPs. it was funny how they would interact ahah

[timber gull]

it’s a very strange sensation to look in a mirror and not recognise yourself…

ya felt

like i look like the body but when u have nonhumans show up theyre like "😟"

i had to take ryn’s makeup off, had to use the mirror. normally i don’t look in mirrors. i make a point not to. it wasn’t unpleasant necessarily… just strange.

[acoustic fjord]

so many messages here 😵‍💫

[steady wolf]

yes?

[acoustic fjord]

uh ..nothing.

[urban sage]

They haven't fully formed yet not any of them. Half of them haven't even started appearing more consistently

[heady hornet]

When the newly discovered (was there for months or weeks at least before being discovered today) speaks all the Spanish we learnt (not much not even the basics lol just like 3 words) but I feel like he speaks more Spanish than we know rn but that's the first one that's bilingual

Ngl was so confused when I heard him say his name is Anthony then I heard Antonio but I knew it wasn't just one then pulled up google translate and was like ohhh one is Spanish. That's actually pretty cool didn't even know stupid in Spanish Spanish he typed that and I looked it up and it was spelt right and everything. We're new to this so we just chilling rn trying to wrap our head around this

[timber gull]

we have some groups for languages

[heady hornet]

?

[timber gull]

simply plural grouos sorry

seizury so our brain was slow

we have organized groups for those who speak languages vs those who dont

[peak sierra]

Honestly I'm surprised we don't have someone who speaks spanish, cause we used to read a spanish language book for kids when we were young. Or french honestly cause of french class. But both we didn't study much too so I guess its to be expected.

[peak sierra]

How do you calm anxiety that didn't/doesn't have an obvious trigger?
I can't tell if I'm experiencing another headmates emotions or my own.
I get really sad, then start feeling really anxious with a tight feeling in my chest, then I start dissociating and it ends with a headache. I keep getting these almost daily at different stengths. /nav
Anyone have any suggestions?

[heady hornet]

Distractions
Showers help me
Watching YouTube after a shower
Snack
Cold drink
Don't stop yourself from crying
Keep contact with close people
Don't hide emotions
Know its okay to feel that way
Know it'll get better
Also dms open if u need

If you couldn't tell I have severe anxiety lol (not diagnosed)

[peak sierra]

Thank you, just unsure how to process it and stop it from happening on repeat.
That does help a bit though, thank you.

[hollow orchid]

Starting to requestion our validity of being a part of a system. Feeling very invalid because brain is confused and stuff. We don't have amnesia, but at the same time we do in some ways. Liv is always co-con and often masks us and I'm starting to wonder if its all ||in our head|| or smth. /nav

I have a headache right now /nav

[heady hornet]

Same tbh
But I try to think of all the trauma that caused this and knowing that our brain knew we wouldn't make it otherwise

[heady hornet]

Yw

[digital abyss]

i kinda understand that, but i have big amnesia so its definetly less in that aspect i worry abt

the fear of faking is prominent but thats kinda part of the disorder

you arent supposed to know u have the disorder

[hollow orchid]

Yeah... Im just afraid: What if I am faking?

[heady hornet]

[hollow orchid]

🫂

[heady hornet]

[timber gull]

pro tip /hj

if you think your faking, your not LMAO

Duck Lord (pls @ reply) {📜} ↩️

[Reply to:](#1151243634876891246 message) Yeah... Im just afraid: What if I am faking?

fakers do it intentionally for the most part

and if its something you question all the time, you arent faking without realizing it (those disorders where u fake a disorder unintentionally or whatever theyre called)

[hollow orchid]

Thank you! I appreciate it

[timber gull]

nw ^^

[heavy steppe]

Yes I have been there before

[hollow orchid]

Oki

[timber gull]

random thing, my sp colour looks really pretty with these two colours.

[hollow orchid]

That does look really cool!!

[timber gull]

headaches are annoying.

Its so annoying when you know who you are but you dont know where you end and the other alters in or close to front begin. Like bro im trying to focus-

[timber gull]

Passive influence is crazy

[heady hornet]

Realll

Don't like snakes but Adorra be having me excited and wanting to touch them

Like. . . No thanks

[digital abyss]

we got a guy who drinks straight milk and the host hates it so whenever hes co con he drinks milk for funnies and its like “mmm.. EWW… mmmm good milk- 😰☹️…”

funniest shit ever

[heady hornet]

XD

I love straight milk

[wintry trellis]

It is good

[hollow orchid]

Cw: Caps for a point
I found this somewhere on Pinterest!

[heavy steppe]

this makes so much since

[timber gull]

i did not realise how strong adam’s influence was. /lh

[timber gull]

there are roles in our system where some of us can see headspace better than others, and im one of them. i was talking to our partner system meeting someone i hadn’t in their system and started recalling some mental things and innerworld convos

i have no idea how to feel abt this info like its funny but also i feel like im faking now uhm!!

[timber gull]

ok so recently one of our littles said that he likes being called emmy, so we started calling him that and everythung but then we started to notice that (the little is basically always frontstuck there have only been a few days where he hasnt been here) that when emmy was there he was also there(this wasnt always the case but it was often) and i was like hmm, and i started looking at possibilities, its most likely that the little was hiding emmy or something similar, and as far as we knew we didnt have a core, and i thought about it for a bit and the little acts alot like we did when we were little and also the name emmy is very similar to our old nickname we gave us when we were little, im just really confused at the moment, about lots of things like is she our core ir jhst another little, which was being hidden for reasons that we dont know, is the original litte split, ig im just looking for a little guidence and opinions??? Im genuinly really confused

Sorry for the long message

[timber gull]

hey, does anyone have any good picrews they'd like to recommend me? from what i can remember there's so many options and it's really hard to navigate, i don't know where to start hahah, sorry for posting over!! ^^" (and if i should have posted this somewhere else!!)

for ref, cores arent a real thing with did/osdd. its prolly a little who was dormant for a bit from childhood.

Emily- she/they ↩️

[Reply to:](#1151243634876891246 message) ok so recently one of our littles said that he likes being called emmy, so we started calling him th…

i wish i did :p we draw our pfps

Reese (They/Them) // TCC • ↩️

[Reply to:](#1151243634876891246 message) hey, does anyone have any good picrews they'd like to recommend me? from what i can remember there's…

that's so cool! i wish i had the patience hahah

🗡 — GAIL ! THEY / ANY — 🎬 ⋆ . ↩️

[Reply to:](#1151243634876891246 message) i wish i did :p we draw our pfps 📎

cores are a thing coined by endogenic/non-trauma based “systems”. did/osdd is caused by childhood trauma where identity exploratiom wasnt an option, and there was no “original part”, when the different types of personalities you grow up are supposed to fuse into one identity at a young young age, it cant, and puts up barriers. there is no original, but its a covert disorder, in which you are prolly made to believe there was one. we dont know who was the past frequent fronter since before 9th grade. idk if that helps

🗡 — GAIL ! THEY / ANY — 🎬 ⋆ . ↩️

[Reply to:](#1151243634876891246 message) for ref, cores arent a real thing with did/osdd. its prolly a little who was dormant for a bit from … 📎

ty!

Reese (They/Them) // TCC • ↩️

[Reply to:](#1151243634876891246 message) that's so cool! i wish i had the patience hahah 📎

[tight flax]

Ahhhh ok thank you

[timber gull]

nw!

friendly reminder to the systems in this chat

did / osdd is extremly confusing and thats on purpose

ur brain isnt supposed to let you know you have it, and feeling like your faking or exaggerating or confused honestly solidifies you arent

[tight flax]

Yea

[timber gull]

ur brain made it so you didnt know to survive the childhood experiences, and for how its now hardwired, its still trying to do that, make u think u dont have it and make it hard to piece things together

i don't know why but this unlocked something in my brain lol. /pos
we've seen people say this many times and it made sense to us but something just clicked for me.
i'm aware this message is kind of pointless but... i'm typing it anyway, might as well send it hahahah XD

🗡 — GAIL ! THEY / ANY — 🎬 ⋆ . ↩️

[Reply to:](#1151243634876891246 message) cores are a thing coined by endogenic/non-trauma based “systems”. did/osdd is caused by childhood tr… 📎

[hollow orchid]

Thank you /gen

[timber gull]

like we discovered systemism end of 2022 but beginning of 2023 told our friends we were wrong because it couldve been POTS

absolutly no f!cking sense how it coorilates but its literally just my brain scrambling like “NO GO BACK”

ya nw!

Reese (They/Them) // TCC • ↩️

[Reply to:](#1151243634876891246 message) i don't know why but this unlocked something in my brain lol. /pos
we've seen people say this many t… 📎

course :]

Duck Lord (pls @ reply) {📜} ↩️

[Reply to:](#1151243634876891246 message) Thank you /gen

[hollow orchid]

We had syscovery in 7th grade due to a friend
Its been a few years lol

[timber gull]

pulling any strings to try and make things normal again and finding any reason possible

you arent supposed to know, its how u survived, and itll be a slight fight with ur brain for a bit

therapy helps a ton

🗡 — GAIL ! THEY / ANY — 🎬 ⋆ . ↩️

[Reply to:](#1151243634876891246 message) like we discovered systemism end of 2022 but beginning of 2023 told our friends we were wrong becaus…

[heady hornet]

Thanks

[hollow orchid]

I wish I could get le therapys

[heady hornet]

Still convince myself I'm faking somehow tho

[timber gull]

itll happen shrugs

[timber gull]

Omg I needed to hear this

🗡 — GAIL ! THEY / ANY — 🎬 ⋆ . ↩️

[Reply to:](#1151243634876891246 message) ur brain made it so you didnt know to survive the childhood experiences, and for how its now hardwir…

I just like cannot peice together a timeline at all it always goes so wrong and it feels like my brain jumbles it up on purpose

[timber gull]

ya

theres a point for it as gayl said

[timber gull]

Yeah

[west cloud]

oh uh, we probably needed to hear about the part of "[your brain] is still trying to make it hard to piece things together".
because my brain just creates random panic attacks after almost every discovery and the amnesia gets its things back [my new knowledge about systems], and that started to make sense

[heavy steppe]

feeling fake hitting hard

😦

[heady hornet]

Oof, I feel you. Its been popping up and stuff for us but I honestly just give up trying to deny or confirm. Don't have the energy atp

[hollow orchid]

Same

[heavy steppe]

i try not to confirm and just accept that i am not faking but my brain is so weird

[heady hornet]

Aww I'm sorry

[hollow orchid]

Good grounding technique for anyone who struggles with dissociation that I found:
Find a song (preferably with no words, but whatever works :) )
Focus on 1 thing in the background of the song (like bass, percussion, supporting notes)
Visualize if you can. How do those notes look?
If it isn't working out, thats okay! I recommend doing a few times with different instruments!

[hollow orchid]

I think I'm allowed to put this in here, but I feel at peace with my system right now. Like I understand why they're there, what caused them to form

Unfortunately, I don't have access to therapy, and I would love to heal, but right now, I'm content. /nav /pos

[wintry trellis]

Thank you soo much

[hollow orchid]

Yeah, of course!!

[timber gull]

Does anyone have any advice for forcing an alter out of front due to the fact that they won't stop working until the body collapses or passes out?

[digital abyss]

u can always try to trigger front someone else

[timber gull]

True but its hard to kick 'em out

[digital abyss]

u can have a different alter try and take the wheel instead, slightly pushing back the current fronter whos overworking the body

ive had that happen to me by gatekeepers bc i exhaust myself as the host 💀

[timber gull]

We'll try 🤞 hopefully it works 😭

Here's your reminder to sleep lol /nf /lh

ToothVoid — 🎬 ⋆ . ↩️

[Reply to:](#1151243634876891246 message) ive had that happen to me by gatekeepers bc i exhaust myself as the host 💀

[digital abyss]

its mid day

we’re fine but thx

[peak sierra]

Have certain designated break times, once that becomes a routine it'd help the whole system.

[wintry trellis]

I am tired of being out but if I go they will have to and they don't know where they are.

||very bad flashbacks, like if I stop fronting, they will stab themselves cause think there is something touching them||

Violence

[peak sierra]

I’m sorry you guys go through that

[timber gull]

..

[peak sierra]

💀 at least everyone’s excited to be around

I mean my whole subsys has been active so I kinda know the pain

[timber gull]

thank you to everyone who was in chat with us during this. you’re presence may not have been remembered very well, but thank you for being there. /gen /nav

blurry | 🫧💫 ↩️

[Reply to:](#1151243634876891246 message) .. 📎

[peak sierra]

We are all cofronting constantly almost

[timber gull]

please don’t say that, even as a joke.

it was a horrible experience and the only one who was “excited” was the one who’s entire role is centred on being happy and excited.

we probably should’ve used a tone tag, but having 12 of us switching rapidly in and out of front is not a positive experience. it is in fact extremely negative.

/nav

✨Unhinged Undead ✨ ↩️

[Reply to:](#1151243634876891246 message) 💀 at least everyone’s excited to be around

[peak sierra]

Sorry. Just I know the chaos of having everyone in front. I didn’t realize it was a traumatic day. Sorry.

I didn’t mean to be insensitive

[tight flax]

Km sorry

Thats horrible i hope it gets better soon

[rocky zealot]

\ hope everyone is having a nice non-switchy non-dissociative day ✨

[wintry trellis]

Better than yesterday

[heady hornet]

Yesterday I let 2 others front. I always was confused why no one else would front when the body is in distress but I think I may have somehow been unconsciously pushing them away. It did help when they fronted after those flashbacks though. I just need to figure out how to not push them away immediately without knowing. If anyone has any suggestions, lmk please

[heady hornet]

Luckily we barely switch and when we do it's smooth and quick and there's only a bit of fuzz and confusion for like 5-10 seconds then whoever fronts starts to get settled, but ty and wish the same for you

[rocky zealot]

to us is more like being grounded, to be sure of fronting, and to not push them away we usually have a gatekeeper near or in front. also thinking positively and communicating with them while they are here, and slowly getting myself away. this is, for us at least, a great solution. hope this can help or make you think and pop some ideas /info /gen /pos -mykah, leo

[heady hornet]

I actually have you added on SP lol

But i could try that

Communication sucks though

[rocky zealot]

yeah i remember! /p -mykah

[rocky zealot]

mhh, could you use a private chat / group / server, were you can text? :3 -mykah

we generally use sp chats or a private server. someone uses telegram but without proxying other than having the sign in the end of the messages -leo

[heady hornet]

I'm always co-con so to us it makes less sense to and the communication is better when they're closer or I can see them in headspace but can't hear them or make out what they're saying

We're now starting to leave notes though on SP so that helps too with validation :D

[rocky zealot]

leaving notes is actually a great idea! maybe leaving some "guides" or "tips" to the next fronters on how to do things or check ups like "in family, update, we have ..., we do this..., do not do this..., instead, other options can be..." :3 -mykah, leo

[peak sierra]

We are alright, very foggy brained today, feeling the pressure but it’s probably stress of a lot.

How about you guys?

[rocky zealot]

better than yesterday! mentally, bodily still in pain but we'll rest a bit :3 thank you for asking! <3 -leo, mykah

[rocky zealot]

yeah could be stress, if you can take some time to decompress and do something you like, or taking care of the body. this will pass and you feel better <3 -mykah

[peak sierra]

That’s good you guys are recovering well. Hopefully the pain subsides sooner than later.

Mostly reading Manga to relax. Can barely focus on it though. I feel like there’s a ||stabby|| brick in my brain and I feel spacey. Our moms trying to get us to job hunt today, which I was already going to after this feeling subsided, which makes the PDA in my brain say “Nope. Don’t want to.”

[rocky zealot]

relatable, i'm sorry you felt this way. maybe now you can't really focus and stuff, but you will make it thru with some patience and time. getting a job is important but don't ever forget to take care about the body and you as sys. you deserve a lot /p

[peak sierra]

Thank you. Yeah. We really do appreciate you guys. Life isn’t easy, but gotta make do with what you’ve got, right? /lh-p

[heady hornet]

Yeaa

Off topic but I just remember a random conversation I heard in headspace but all I heard was "You smell like burritos" which I don't know what they smell like cause never had it but just randomly remembered that

[west cloud]

oh we had a similar thing once, but it was loud meow at the whole headspace [we don't have a cat, only host who screams like cats]. people were shocked

– Author

[heady hornet]

😭

I hear the weirdest thingss

[timber gull]

i find it interesting that i’m more used to the original korean version of a song and ryn’s used to the english version

[heavy steppe]

one of my alters sandy is half cat so all day i hear purrs

[plain pumice]

Is it ‘normal’ (I use that term very loosely) for someone who is not a system to think for an extended period of time about what there system name would be?

This is a genuine question, if anything I said or how it’s said is hurtful or disrespectful please kindly let me know so I can learn. Thank you.

Also no obligation to answer from anyone

[timber gull]

i mean. before i thought seriously about being a system i thought about it-

i don’t know if that’s a good example because me discovering alters was complicated and was a process over multiple years and thinking about a system name was in that period of time.

so basically i don’t know but before (kind of) discovering my system i did think about this occasionally for fun because i thought it was interesting.

[heady hornet]

Same as ryn for us

Started questioning at 11 actually

Then denial then years later at 13 2 months before I turned 14 I was like, yea

[sonic talon]

i think i might have DID, i’ve done heaps of research and the symptoms of DID line up with the symptoms i’ve been experiencing

[paper crater]

. you can dm us if you want to chat privately or you can chat here about anything!

[sonic talon]

oki!! my boyfriend is helping me work stuff out <3

[heavy steppe]

Had amnisia today during pride and got confused and lost while switching between my girls. But luckily we are ok and eventually got to have a good time at the festival

[timber gull]

it feels as if everyone is extremely easily triggered. like they are all waiting outside a room to come in and be fronting. it’s been a strange day because of this and i hope it ends soon.. /neg /nav

[peak sierra]

I’m sorry guys. Things will get easier someday. I hope for your guys’s sake that it will.

[keen hare]

ello other system ppl

anyone else sometimes just randomly forget they're a system?

[hollow orchid]

Yup! Today at work 😭

[timber gull]

Barely ever :/

Pla!d 0nes ↩️

[Reply to:](#1151243634876891246 message) anyone else sometimes just randomly forget they're a system?

[midnight drift]

Honestly depends what you mean?
Not always on my mind but I think I am definitely reminded of it occasionally

Sometimes I'll lose a few hours and hop back in somewhere completely different like oh shit

[timber gull]

Hehhehehe new host checkkkkk 🥲😅🫠🤠

[hollow orchid]

Yea thats same here

[rocky zealot]

sometimes yeah! or forgot others in sys!! mostly that ✨-noah

[civic iron]

Guys :,) we kept using we/us in a group chat and someone asked if we were a system and we were like OH nooooo these people are in our school :D so we friend requested the person and they said "oh shoot am I in trouble 😭"

[rocky zealot]

ooufff, hoping it goes well, but if happens to have a supporter? could be cool! /gen /pos -mykah

[timber gull]

good luck! :)

[The Notes] F; Lime ↩️

[Reply to:](#1151243634876891246 message) Guys :,) we kept using we/us in a group chat and someone asked if we were a system and we were like …

[civic iron]

They're thankfully not also in our school and they were very understanding that we didn't want it to get out

[timber gull]

that’s good that they were understanding! /gen

i wish more people were. (general statement, not aimed at anyone in particular.)

agree agree nods

[heavy steppe]

hope it goes well. If people i know who don't understand DID or other stuff like it found out about my system I would worry so much about their reaction

[timber gull]

tw - ignorance.

||my mum has asked on multiple occasions what the difference between schizophrenia and DID is.||

[heavy steppe]

there is lots different but most don't bother to research

[timber gull]

we think our host might be part of a subsystem..

[keen hare]

ah we also have a noah!

[tight flax]

Oh?

[timber gull]

I’m not 100% sure, I’ll tell you about it later

rats will eat you ||rat bags sys ↩️

[Reply to:](#1151243634876891246 message) Oh?

[tight flax]

Ok

[timber gull]

i’m just sorta in front for some reason.. and i don’t know why. i’ve fronted twice recently. this is weird.

[peak sierra]

Yes lots

[timber gull]

How can you tell if you’re part of a subsystem?

[timber gull]

basically having same symptoms of everyone being a system, but in a singular alter. also, seeing them different than usual (mannerisms, voice, behaving, outfits, and many other things like the way of thinking and resolving things, or doing things), heavy amnesia and acting different with specific triggers (we like to call them "clicks" because triggers "clicks" in your mind and make you switch or something). also other things maybe but i'm forgetting- will edit if i can add something else /g /info

[hybrid skiff]

interesting :o

[hollow orchid]

I like the term "clicks"

[paper crater]

I mean I definitely have heavy amnesia despite very few switches. (Maybe one or two a week).

Hawks is co con as well, so he might just be stealing the memories.

But like Alastor definitely fused with Jay to form me. But I suddenly heard Al’s voice randomly the other day, which says he’s still here separately but it didn’t come from the usual headspace area.

[timber gull]

I mean I definitely have heavy amnesia despite very few switches. (Maybe one or two a week).

Hawks is co con as well, so he might just be stealing the memories.

But like Alastor definitely fused with Jay to form me. But I suddenly heard Al’s voice randomly the other day, which says he’s still here separately but it didn’t come from the usual headspace area.

Leo (they/he) |☀Solar ↩️

[Reply to:](#1151243634876891246 message) basically having same symptoms of everyone being a system, but in a singular alter. also, seeing the…

do yall have any tips? We have been having trouble communicating for a while and its hard to tell whos who and either people wont or cant front.

any suggestions or tips?

also yeah I know the whole not in communicate and not knowing thing is supposed to happen cause duh dissociative disorder but like idk if anyone had good tips.

its like we can barely hear each other and barely know whose who

covert disorder is covert disordering 😔

[heavy steppe]

Anyone got any tips on telling people about your system. When I say my Littles are more then normal Littles for regular little space people get very confused

[peak sierra]

Depends on what you mean. If you mean that in a sense your littles are more than a mindset you fall back into? or if your littles have more of a older mindset in order to keep them safe? Or something else?

[heavy steppe]

well people say are your little ;ike littles for little space and when i try to explain they are alters they get confused

[peak sierra]

They must probably not know that DID+OSDD systems exist.

Maybe start by explaining how DID is formed.
And add a few examples from either your own system or systems you’ve met, so they may have a better understanding.

[heavy steppe]

that can work ty

[peak sierra]

No problem. It’s a hard topic to explain that’s for sure, but you got this!

[timber gull]

if i could wish for one thing, it would be stability because omg this is awful.

[wintry trellis]

Agreed

[timber gull]

we figured something out! finally.

literally took days, and still not actually sure about it, but figured it out.. mostly?

i mean.. everything still sucks, but we figured part of it out so that’s good right?

[peak sierra]

Saw a system talk to themself in public. A persecutor-like-behaviour person was shouting at her alters saying she was #1 and I just kinda looked at them with a “Huh???” Expression. They didn’t care of course but it was an odd experience.

It was in a Tim Hortons too.

[timber gull]

I love when our partner interacts with us ans acknowledges as individuals it actually means so much like for example he asked specifically who at front said something so they could properly quote it and yesterday they interacted with me, Lime and Raven so separately- responding to all of us separately at front (even though it was at my expense (/pos) because I was being teased by my sysmates and our partner :,D oh well)

[timber gull]

we’re going to do some pk maintenance, because as far as i know 2 people have descriptions and we’ve been wanting to update that for a while.

also want to add some more things into the sp but that feels like a job for another day.

[steady wolf]

also idk if anyone knew this but I recently read some of the docs again to see if there were any updates (just as a mod cuz I like to be able to help others lol) but I noticed they now also have a web application which might make some things easier like viewing your system and updating stuff

https://dash.pluralkit.me/

things like this

but I think you can do almost everything you can edit using commands using the web interface rn

[timber gull]

it looks easier to manage but at the same time harder… somehow-

[steady wolf]

it's a lot better on a laptop, pc or tablet but I just thought about it 😭

[timber gull]

the way pk commands works.. well- works really well with how our mind works for some reason. which is so weird because everyone else seems to have a hard time understanding it and we’re just…. here- 😭 /lh /neu

yeah, it looks a little squished in that photo.

stan754 [tech support] ↩️

[Reply to:](#1151243634876891246 message) it's a lot better on a laptop, pc or tablet but I just thought about it 😭

[steady wolf]

oh yeah no I understand them well too but it's still nice for others

and you can also view your system (or someone else's)

at least what they put on public lol

for example your system only has the basic information on public and you can't see the entire members list

[timber gull]

yeah, we’re going through trying to set all the members up with privacy things right now. to be able to show intros for each of us, which is something i’m meant to be doing but i’m.. not.

stan754 [tech support] ↩️

[Reply to:](#1151243634876891246 message) for example your system only has the basic information on public and you can't see the entire member…

[steady wolf]

understandable lmao

that is a lot easier through the web interface cuz you can just set that up in bulk for all members

[timber gull]

yeah…. that’s good- because i don’t know who has things sorted already and who doesn’t. also, there’s not a lot of us generally speaking, but there’s too many for me to be bothered changing everything. ok, i might look at. and by me, i mean whoever is motivated to because i think, personally, food is more important and setting up privacy-

stan754 [tech support] ↩️

[Reply to:](#1151243634876891246 message) that is a lot easier through the web interface cuz you can just set that up in bulk for all members

[steady wolf]

food is way more important

https://dash.pluralkit.me/dash/bulk-member-privacy (this is the direct link to change it btw)

you probably have to login first tho

[timber gull]

yeah, we do. but food-

stan754 [tech support] ↩️

[Reply to:](#1151243634876891246 message) you probably have to login first tho

[steady wolf]

yes no food has priority

but for when you want it later

or anyone else lol

[timber gull]

food first, then i don’t know what because i can’t predict the future. so uhm.. we’ll see-

[steady wolf]

yes

[timber gull]

i’ve just had the realisation that our room looks different. 😭

i’ve been sat here the entire time.

[steady wolf]

or just ask me nicely and I'll do it for you /hj

[timber gull]

my current prediction is that i’ll leave front halfway through getting food, we’ll get the food successfully and then return to our room where someone unstable will front and chaos. but that’s just my prediction. /lh

[steady wolf]

😭😂

[hollow orchid]

TW: ||physically sick||
So, we're ||sick||, right? How do you deal with everyone (/sys) being upset? Cuz pretty much everyone, including our littles, are upset and we don't know how to help them. /gq /nav

[heady hornet]

I've finally returned

[digital abyss]

Wb.

[timber gull]

absolutely no advice, but i hope you can figure it out soon! :) /gen

Duck Lord (pls @ reply) {📜} ↩️

[Reply to:](#1151243634876891246 message) TW: ||physically sick||
So, we're ||sick||, right? How do you deal with everyone (/sys) being upset?…

[hollow orchid]

Thanks! /gen

It's mainly just been me fronting tbh -Lime

[civic iron]

Oh oh oh our host's name is Lime!! -Lake

[hollow orchid]

Oh! That's cool! It's a pretty good name, imo :)

[heady hornet]

Little fronted at school today. (Dw it was safe and was only a second). This was all because stuffies were mentioned :3

Also need to make sure it doesn't happen again bit was soooooo cuteee

[peak sierra]

Is it ok to completely abandon the body’s birthday?
I don’t wish to celebrate it anymore. Other than for legal identification purposes

We have often felt uncomfortable around the Body’s birthday, as if it doesn’t exist, never rightly knew why.

[timber gull]

i dont see why not. its a day, you can celebrate any day!

[timber gull]

Oop I see another chaos!

Oh..?

our system name is “chaos & co”

[karmic birch]

Lemme not proxy for a sec

[timber gull]

Haha, nice.

My name is just chaos.

[digital abyss]

\ Our collective name is Void or ToothVoid

[timber gull]

Introject L

❓ — CHAOS ! HE / THEY — 🎬 ⋆ . ↩️

[Reply to:](#1151243634876891246 message) My name is just chaos.

A lot of us have different birthdays than the body. Me included.

❓ — CHAOS ! HE / THEY — 🎬 ⋆ . ↩️

[Reply to:](#1151243634876891246 message) i dont see why not. its a day, you can celebrate any day!

I’m the only alter that celebrates the body’s bday and that’s cos I age with the body as host long term host

✨Unhinged Undead ✨ ↩️

[Reply to:](#1151243634876891246 message) Is it ok to completely abandon the body’s birthday?
I don’t wish to celebrate it anymore. Other than…

[timber gull]

uhh

i think we’re rapid switching

right before bed because that’s obviously the most convenient time for this /s

oh yeah 100% it’s the correct time to be rapid switching /s

would u like some advice or distraction or to just talk about it? /genq

we don’t want anything right now /nm

alrighty! /gen /nm

[heady hornet]

Just remembered we had our longest switch which wasn't long but for us it was longer than usual and was a couple minutes and was so exhausting we fell asleep after about 5 minutes of switching 😭

[hollow orchid]

Ours is the host's name (cuz we're very covert irl), and we're trying to figure out another

[heavy steppe]

owe lord I hate rapid switching before bed. I never get sleep because of it

[timber gull]

theo’s thoughts when leaving the house.

“why do hands.”
“that cat looks like me.” (he has no relationship to cats. at all-)

and that’s all because he’s being quiet now.

[timber gull]

(his proxy emoji is a black cat though so maybe like- i dunno.)

[digital abyss]

yeah we just use the hosts name irl

[timber gull]

i have a name, and i want people to use it, but i don’t want everyone to know it. if that makes sense.

i want my proxy to have my name, but i don’t want it to be known to everyone. so i’m not sure what to do.. any suggestions? /nf

a couple of us have names that aren’t ours as our “online” name. like me for example. but she doesn’t want that…

honestly i want my own proxy for an emoji because the -k at the end is getting annoying. /lh

[timber gull]

we might be figuring it out.

[heady hornet]

I have a suggestion :)
You can interact with people you trust and give them your name so they can call you that. Or a nickname? Or just tell the people you talk to

Ick hold on

[timber gull]

My proxy

I keep forgetting to proxy lol

I have a suggestion :)
You can interact with people you trust and give them your name so they can call you that. Or a nickname? Or just tell the people you talk to

[heady hornet]

There

Omg-

[timber gull]

There

😭

Okay m autoproxied now

[hollow orchid]

yea

[timber gull]

Forgot to say but finally kinda at peace with not being in denial because usually switches were super fast and very vague and I wouldn't even notice but the other day an anger holder came to front which I again didn't realise but I felt exactly when she left for the first time and then something clicked and I was like omg I haven't been somehow faking

[silent belfry]

hello
i keep going back and forth and i dont know if i am a system or its my other trauma and dissociative disorders?/gen

[weak basin]

GG @silent belfry, you just advanced to level 6!

[timber gull]

From what I just read you basically just said you're a system. Why do you doubt?

Dog ↩️

[Reply to:](#1151243634876891246 message) hello
i keep going back and forth and i dont know if i am a system or its my other trauma and dissoc…

[silent belfry]

the thing i am not sure about if i have alters which from what i heard is an important factor
i have ptsd, bpd, depersonalization and derealization and i dont know how to tell if i have alters or not

[timber gull]

figured a thing out for her. thanks for le suggestion. :) /gen

𝄞 . Mara . 🌸 . any/prn 🎶 ↩️

[Reply to:](#1151243634876891246 message) I have a suggestion :)
You can interact with people you trust and give them your name so they can ca…

[timber gull]

🌸₊⸝⸝˚₊ : Ofc!

🌸₊⸝⸝˚₊ : Oop

🌸₊⸝⸝˚₊ : Forgot about proxy

🌸₊⸝⸝˚₊ : But who likes it???

🌸₊⸝⸝˚₊ : Customized it

[heady hornet]

\ Dm me :)
I'm helping a few people rn
You can ask any questions and I'll answer and share my experience

[silent belfry]

Hi thank you so much
Is it okay if I can ask you questions here instead of dm?/gen

[timber gull]

🌸₊⸝⸝˚₊ : Ofc Was just a suggestion

Dog ↩️

[Reply to:](#1151243634876891246 message) Hi thank you so much
Is it okay if I can ask you questions here instead of dm?/gen

[heady hornet]

I'm really not sure if I have alters at this point. It's so confusing ahhh 😭

[lost sluice]

Felt. My system discovery was so long ago (5 years) some of us currently around don't even really remember much of it but I do know it was scary and confusing as hell 😭

[timber gull]

🌸₊⸝⸝˚₊ : Same offer I gave to Dog

R0TT0N (He/him) ↩️

[Reply to:](#1151243634876891246 message) I'm really not sure if I have alters at this point. It's so confusing ahhh 😭

[peak sierra]

Nicknames that are close but not exactly that.

[steady wolf]

hey can you please not send messages like that it makes it harder for people using a screen reader and also it's not allowed in the #rules

[faint solstice]

Psst, 𝄞 . Mara . 🌸 . any/prn (@heady hornet), you have been pinged by @steady wolf.

[timber gull]

oki

[timber gull]

I see not allowed but how make harder for screen readers? /genq
(Jus wanna know cus friends and people close use them n don't wanna hurt anyone)

stan754 [tech support] ↩️

[Reply to:](#1151243634876891246 message) hey can you please not send messages like that it makes it harder for people using a screen reader a…

[steady wolf]

not 100% sure about this message but not all screen readers work the same

[timber gull]

Okay. Was just wondering cause my screen reader can read it but yea thanks for letting me know

[gusty bone]

us! we’re a system, but there was one time where one of our alters (shes 7) kept walking up to people, asking “do we look good?” and people would always be so confused at that, because they were strangers.

[heavy steppe]

I have alter she is 2 who goes up and says hi so much to people and it confuses people because she will do it like hi then next second say hi to someone else and over and over. It scares me because she could get hurt at so little

[timber gull]

does anybody know how to like. keep littles out of front-

[little dew]

for us talking "big people talk" as one of my littles calls it does the job (as in chores homework or anything that may not be fun for little ones)

[timber gull]

I legit just set my mind into Denial and hope for the best

ryn | ask prns | 🫧💫 ↩️

[Reply to:](#1151243634876891246 message) does anybody know how to like. keep littles out of front-

Think gatekeepers can help though

[gusty bone]

i have no idea. our system does have littles, but luckily, theyre bad with technology, and we set a long, complicated password for our devices so that none of our littles can try to get on.

[timber gull]

gatekeepers should keep then out of front but if they sneak past maybe try and plan contingencies for if that happens?

ryn | ask prns | 🫧💫 ↩️

[Reply to:](#1151243634876891246 message) does anybody know how to like. keep littles out of front-

[timber gull]

to ryn’s knowledge, and my own quite frankly, we don’t have a gatekeeper.

if we had the motivation for that it could work. thank you. /gen

ash (@ to reply) ↩️

[Reply to:](#1151243634876891246 message) for us talking "big people talk" as one of my littles calls it does the job (as in chores homework o…

that doesn’t work for us sadly.. glad it works for you though.

osamoo dazai ↩️

[Reply to:](#1151243634876891246 message) i have no idea. our system does have littles, but luckily, theyre bad with technology, and we set a …

I hate hate hate people who make youtube videos on “DID fakers” who then go on to say “Ask anyone who you know is disgnosed with DID and they’ll say you can’t ‘alter’ as someone from a tv show” ||THE FUCK DO YOU MEAN||
(Caps in last part)

[hollow orchid]

I also hate people who do that

[heavy steppe]

People who do that drive me nuts

[wintry trellis]

That's why I don't tell people because I don't want to be grouped with stupid people

[gusty bone]

literally! fictives are real and valid. we dont have any in our system, but theyre still valid for anyone that has them

[hollow orchid]

We have a few fictives here

[timber gull]

we have a lot of fictives

[hollow orchid]

Which is super valid

[lost sluice]

We have a small system community in person on our college campus (about 15 of us) and so we see a lot of different experiences with DID, OSDD, and dissociation in general. We know a system that is 90% fictional introjects, a system with a solid handful, and we are a system with only a few. We know a system with none at all, too.

I automatically don't trust anyone who starts a claim with "all systems..." or "no system..." lmao

[hollow orchid]

Woahh! That's amazing!!

Like its not amazing that yall were traumatized, but I think its amazing that you have that community /lh /gen

[lost sluice]

Yeah I gotcha xD

It is

And we feel a sense of pride in it because we... kind of started it

My campus also has a very large trans community (the discord server alone has over 150 members, and some of us aren't in it)

And we eventually decided to be open about our multiplicity in that space. And as it turns out, we weren't the only diagnosed system, let alone undiagnosed system

And being open about our experiences gave several other people the chance to explore their experiences and put words to what they hadn't been able to before

Then bam, small plural community within the trans community on campus

All because someone started up a convo about mental health representation in the media and one of us decided to run their big mouth and admit we have DID before going off about Split 🤣

[weak basin]

GG @gusty bone, you just advanced to level 2!

[hollow orchid]

Woahh!! Im personally undiagonised due to living conditions, but I would love a community like that

[lost sluice]

Yeah I think most of our little community are undiagnosed, it's just two or three of us that are

[wanton elbow]

hi!

i’ve been feeling very out of it since a family issue but our system doesn’t switch or at least hasn’t figured it out yet

so we’re just existing 🤷‍♀️

but it’s good to know the peanut gallery is still here

/nav

[timber gull]

Gallery?..

[timber gull]

system name i think.

𝄞 . Mara . 🌸 . any/prn 🎶 ↩️

[Reply to:](#1151243634876891246 message) Gallery?..

[lost sluice]

A peanut gallery is also a reference to spectators in a circus

We call our system a peanut gallery as a joke sometimes

It's because back in the day at events like the circus or a baseball game, people would be hired to walk around the audience selling bags of peanuts. A crowd, especially a crowd seated in a stadium, is sometimes called a gallery. Therefore, peanut gallery

So when the one in front wants to make a joke about being watched by a crowd of other alters we can call it a peanut gallery

[wanton elbow]

oh we named it the peanut gallery bc one of the people in our system thought it was cute and everyone else agreed 😭

but that’s actually a nice analogy /gen

[timber gull]

is there a rule on what age alters are or aren't allowed to interact with this server

also does anyone know if there a rule of fictives from 18+ sources being allowed to interact with this server?

i don’t think there’s a specific rule stated but no children. we don’t let anybody under the age of 13 online.

jayce 🔥 he/they 🔥 ↩️

[Reply to:](#1151243634876891246 message) is there a rule on what age alters are or aren't allowed to interact with this server

thats what we assumed

as long as they don’t discuss 18+ content in detail then it should be fine.

jayce 🔥 he/they 🔥 ↩️

[Reply to:](#1151243634876891246 message) also does anyone know if there a rule of fictives from 18+ sources being allowed to interact with th…

[weak basin]

GG @karmic birch, you just advanced to level 4!

[timber gull]

nice one i'll let them know

[lost sluice]

That's really cute!

[lost sluice]

I don't remember seeing specific rules for the server so it probably depends on your system, since alter age doesn't necessarily equal their capabilities in all systems

We have some of our younger ones that we know are totally fine online and some who aren't, even if they present as the same age

[midnight drift]

While this server does not have any written rules staff request that any alters who have an age below 13 do not interact with the server. As for agre sliders the same rule applies that when they are below 13 we ask that they do not interact

[steady wolf]

the only rules we have are that the age for being on here has to be 13 (or the minimum age in your country) and we use that as a rule for littles too

[lost sluice]

OH okay! I'll keep that in mind

[weak basin]

GG @lost sluice, you just advanced to level 4!

[timber gull]

Same, and 3 are from “problematic media”

Duck Lord (pls @ reply) {📜} ↩️

[Reply to:](#1151243634876891246 message) We have a few fictives here

[wanton elbow]

ty!

[timber gull]

Omg you're alive

Harmony || They/She 🎶🧮 ↩️

[Reply to:](#1151243634876891246 message) Same, and 3 are from “problematic media” 📎

[heavy steppe]

Well we're all happy. Got a new invader zim jacket delivered today. Glad for the mood booster we needed it after the Littles were sad and crying today from getting scared by something they say. Poor girls. They are ok though

[worn geode]

i’m glad they’re doing better now

[timber gull]

thank u for the clarification!

stan754 [tech support] ↩️

[Reply to:](#1151243634876891246 message) the only rules we have are that the age for being on here has to be 13 (or the minimum age in your c…

[heavy steppe]

me to its so sad seeing littles cry

[worn geode]

yea :( i hate see our littles cry, i send your littles happy vibes

[heavy steppe]

ty so much

[timber gull]

Aww :(
Give them lots of hugs from me!!!

Forgetful Nonbinary cat (Sorry) ↩️

[Reply to:](#1151243634876891246 message) me to its so sad seeing littles cry

[wanton elbow]

bro someone wants to talk on here and idk who it is

like i just feel it but nobody is talking

[heavy steppe]

will do mara

[timber gull]

Ty!!

they could just want to hang around

Boogie (Please @) ↩️

[Reply to:](#1151243634876891246 message) like i just feel it but nobody is talking

[wanton elbow]

yeah that’s true

it’s been like that since this family issue

so maybe that’s what triggered it? idk

it’s kind of uncomfortable ngl 😭

but not in a bad way

just in a “what’s going on” way

[silent belfry]

hi
my question is how did you find out you had alters? was it from someone else or you can tell as well?/gen

[timber gull]

Actually really weird. Personality test kept changing which I was laughing about then realised there were multiple people taking them and lots of research

Even after that I was still in denial

Kept going back and saying I was crazy

Then like months later I finally was like okay

Other stuff that helped was realising the amnesia, the changes in likes, Dislikes, personality etc

And age

Still can't remember my age 😭

I age with the body but with so many people brain can't comprehend

Sry rushing between people

So when I was 11 was drawn to this thing called DID but I didn't have amnesia (to my knowledge) and had no symptoms and especially not alters. After years of on and off Questioning I accepted it when I was 13. I felt invalid because of how young I was but at that time I was already on discord. Tbh a welcoming community you can ask questions in is so good while Questioning. It helped so much and helped understand me and my system more

[silent belfry]

i agree being in a community whos nice and are open to help are very good im glad people helped you
is the amnesia sudden and are you aware while it is happening or afterwards?

[timber gull]

For us the amnesia is like something happens, the next day I know it happened but don't have details. There's also when I just straight can't remember a whole day but can only remember the general idea for the day

Dog ↩️

[Reply to:](#1151243634876891246 message) i agree being in a community whos nice and are open to help are very good im glad people helped you
…

There's also the numbness from bad memories

Like I can't feel the emotions and apparently "normal" people can

But idk

So there's different types of amnesia

[silent belfry]

thats interesting
i feel like amnesia needs to be talked about more talked about
its hard for me to tell if i have alters or not but i do know i have experienced bad memories from childhood, i dissociate mostly when triggered from traumatic events or there are random moments of depersonalization and derealization, the only time i remember amnesia was when i went to the doctor and while in the room i forgot my name and where i was and i was freaking out and the nurses were trying to calm me down, i have cognitive and memory impairment for many reasons and wanted to know if having alters could have been another reason.

[timber gull]

Oh okay

Can feel emotions other time. Don't always have to constantly have emotional amnesia I think I can't remember how it is for us

[timber gull]

Yeah… struggling to chat a lot at the moment /nav

𝄞 . Mara . 🌸 . any/prn 🎶 ↩️

[Reply to:](#1151243634876891246 message) Omg you're alive 📎

[wanton elbow]

does anyone here have alters but you guys don’t switch?

like i mean sometimes someone will be co conscious or smth

but we’ve never switched who’s in front before