DID/OSDD-1 System Chat

[timber gull]

hopefully we can sleep tonight, sleeping has been hard lately. I might take some of my ||cbd|| (🍃) gummies, my doctor gives me them to help me sleep and it helps sm. My family uses them too

[heavy steppe]

A little. Trying to get the littles to nap before fireworks freak us out. But it's raining so not sure if any will happen today. Update grrr after 4 no rain so will see how tonight goes

[hollow orchid]

We've had the worst headache for a few days now and idk what it could be. Also super dissociated

[timber gull]

hope theirs no fireworks then! Get some sleep

Forgetful Nonbinary cat (Sorry) ↩️

[Reply to:](#1151243634876891246 message) A little. Trying to get the littles to nap before fireworks freak us out. But it's raining so not su…

Definitely get some sleep and 100% their is never quietness in the system unless something is up I swear

[⚔] Blake - He/Doc [🥀] ↩️

[Reply to:](#1151243634876891246 message) felt lol 📎

We’ll try thanks! ^^ Insomina + System + Racing thoughts noooottt a good combo LOL

May/Max {🌨} ↩️

[Reply to:](#1151243634876891246 message) Definitely get some sleep and 100% their is never quietness in the system unless something is up I s… 📎

[peak sierra]

Hi I’m, scared to be out. I feel super spacey, shaky and not really in control of my brain. -Renee

I’m not sure what to do other than charge my phone

I’m not sure how to… ground (I think the word was) myself.

I don’t feel safe here.

That and my ear and brain feel like ||electric shocks||.

Tics are active a bit too.

I feel switchy but don’t hear or ‘feel’ anything.

Think motor tic attack. Ears been getting random shocks

[timber gull]

To ground yourself identify things you can see, feel, taste, smell and hear :) What also helps me is feeling textures and air breeze

✨ Chronic Jesus ✨ ↩️

[Reply to:](#1151243634876891246 message) I’m not sure how to… ground (I think the word was) myself.

It will be okay I know its scary

✨ Chronic Jesus ✨ ↩️

[Reply to:](#1151243634876891246 message) I don’t feel safe here.

[peak sierra]

Thank you.

[timber gull]

worst combo ever struggling with that right now. 1:42am no sleep woooo

[⚔] Blake - He/Doc [🥀] ↩️

[Reply to:](#1151243634876891246 message) We’ll try thanks! ^^ Insomina + System + Racing thoughts noooottt a good combo LOL 📎

[peak sierra]

I’m sorry

[timber gull]

thankfully we went to sleep with only a tiny bit of trouble but it was pretty much fine ^^

Eden {🌨} ↩️

[Reply to:](#1151243634876891246 message) worst combo ever struggling with that right now. 1:42am no sleep woooo 📎

[heavy steppe]

Well blacked out last night from fireworks and woke up to a message in my journal where Astrid put the girls in the deepest parts of the inner world in a soundproof room to keep them safe especially for Sandy who is autistic because she has meltdowns from stress

[timber gull]

oh well thats good that she was safe

[fading path]

wow another system talking about how they feel fake !! astonishing behaviour!! /j

i feel so fake for having so many alters and not knowing where most of them even go after the short time they're fronting

like idek what im supposed to do about it either. am i supposed to remove the people i havent seen in ages and consider them just "gone"???

how am i supposed to know if they still exist or not or if they ever even existed in the first place

everything was so much easier when we first discovered we were a system-

obviously not the getting to understand everything and all the confusion about it but like we were such a small system with distinct af personalities and identities and it was so easy to tell who was who 24/7-

now its just like " am i this person? this person? this person? no wait maybe im both- or neither? am i new?!?! actually i think im this person. actually nvm!!!! im just gonna disappear into the void now because i became blurry and will never front again (not on purpose) because of the confusion of knowing who tf i am !! "

[midnight drift]

If it helps I feel that a lot too
I don't speak about it much but denial is a big issue for me & my system and that can come in many forms (such as fake claiming yourself)

Think about it this way:
What would be the "correct" way in your head? Because I guarantee you that whatever you experienced your brain would tell you it's wrong anyway

Too much amnesia
Not enough amnesia
Too much headspace contact
Not enough headspace contact
Too many alters
Not enough alters
Alters are too similar
Alters are too different

It's never enough when denial kicks in. Take a minute to breathe and think

People who worry they are faking probably aren't. And even IF you're not a system, you're not faking, you're just misguided

[fading path]

thank u so much this really helps 😭 ❤️ /gen

[midnight drift]

Ofc :)

[timber gull]

How do you work together to keep your system stable when you don’t have a stable host?
Jay (Host) and Alastor (Persecutor) fused recently to form Harmony, who I think our brain though would be our host, but they ‘got bored in front’ after fronting for 3 days straight and just left front

[fading path]

idk this happens to us all the time 😭

we're kinda just used to it atp but that's probably not helpful at all-

[timber gull]

It’s fine

We’re used to it as well but hate it

Not had a stable host since pre-syscovery (system discovery)

[fading path]

same T_T

we had a host that lasted for like. maybe a month. idk, it was a while ago so i dont remember exactly

greatest moment of all time 😭

[timber gull]

Longest our host survived was 7 years (7-13/14 ish)

But that was pre-syscovery so I don’t know if it counts

Unknown Fronter(s) 🎶🧮 ↩️

[Reply to:](#1151243634876891246 message) Longest our host survived was 7 years (7-13/14 ish)

[fading path]

thats crazyy

[fading path]

fair enough tho

[timber gull]

I think it was stable at least - can’t remember shit

#amnesia

OMG THERE IS A BUS….
(We never see buses near our house xD)

./ot

[fading path]

POG

buses are cool :3

[timber gull]

I love that word 😄
POG

⊹ TCC ⊹ ↩️

[Reply to:](#1151243634876891246 message) :catjam: POG

[fading path]

lmfao ofc you do /lh-t

[timber gull]

Yeah… haha

[fading path]

:3

[timber gull]

But pog is a very poggers word

[fading path]

fr

[timber gull]

That is such a Tommy thing to say 😭

[fading path]

XD

[timber gull]

It’s fineee

Ig that’s why we were struggling with our chest - I’m fem and Tommy is obviously masc.

[fading path]

fair enough

[hollow orchid]

Yea, our host feels like its changing and I think their masc, but we're bodily female-

[timber gull]

Thinking about our host’s journey is pretty interesting. Fem all the way up until 14, then suddenly boom, He/Him. Although he identified as genderfluid because a few of us influenced him into thinking that, unintentionally obviously…

[fading path]

omg same we were definitely just a cis girl until uhh.. 13?

i have no idea what happened ngl

it's kinda scary too cuz like. i know we feel what we feel. i know we're not just some cis girl. but you hear people say things like "you're either trans from birth or not. you can't just "turn" trans" (and i've never said we "turned" trans either cuz like- i mean that just doesn't feel right-) but like. wtf are we then?? what happened 😭 who uncised our gender???

kinda went on a rant sorry

[timber gull]

It’s fine, ig it’s different with systems, because (in our case) the brain may decide that you need a male host in order to stand up to your abuser because being female = being weak

Probably why our sys is male majority, last time we checked at least

[fading path]

yeah makes sense ig

the thing that confuses me most is that we seem to have mostly fem alters

idk, we just didn't expect it 😭

[timber gull]

Yeah, that’s fair

[hollow orchid]

We were entirely cis until I wanna say 14 years old, but we had syscovery at 12 years old

[hollow orchid]

That is the same with our brain, I think.

[hollow orchid]

Feel like a new person is coming to front :c
I suck at explaining things

[timber gull]

If they’re here we could help /nf

help we’ve felt that😭😭

⊹ TCC ⊹ ↩️

[Reply to:](#1151243634876891246 message) now its just like " am i this person? this person? this person? no wait maybe im both- or neither? a…

mhm, our ex-host was a tomboy lesbian and then was like erm nah im trans (hint hint it was problaby just me) and when I took over halfway through highschool (when bella left host when hs started and then the host at that time, Nothing, fronted.) and then she fronted of recent (this year) and was like

😟WHERES OUR HAIR?? (I cut out hair SUPER short)

Unknown Fronter(s) 🎶🧮 ↩️

[Reply to:](#1151243634876891246 message) Thinking about our host’s journey is pretty interesting. Fem all the way up until 14, then suddenly …

mb bro

🙄🤣

[peak sierra]

I feel like system mashed potatoes. Like a bunch of alters inside 1 alter and stuck in front, thinking back and forth to each other with no barriers…. This is odd.

We are individuals inside of a brain suit inside of a meat suit but all feel really conscious of the others.

[timber gull]

That is a good sentence xD

✨ Chronic Jesus ✨ ↩️

[Reply to:](#1151243634876891246 message) We are individuals inside of a brain suit inside of a meat suit but all feel really conscious of the…

[digital abyss]

a friend of ours referred the body as the skinsuit and we just use that phrase now

along with asking whos fronting its just "who's that pokémon"

[steady wolf]

IT'S PIKACHU

[timber gull]

That’s so cool (I don’t know what Pokémon is, but other person here informs me it is good)

¡Void! 🎬 | [SEE BIO] ↩️

[Reply to:](#1151243634876891246 message) a friend of ours referred the body as the skinsuit and we just use that phrase now

along with askin…

[hollow orchid]

Thank you /gen

Update, we found 2 new guys recently. The one that is super close to front and one thats probably an autopilot one

[digital abyss]

ITS insert not pikachu

FUUUU-

/reference

[timber gull]

rats in a trenchcoat

✨ Chronic Jesus ✨ ↩️

[Reply to:](#1151243634876891246 message) We are individuals inside of a brain suit inside of a meat suit but all feel really conscious of the…

[hollow orchid]

Truth

[midnight drift]

This meme was literally us earlier 😭

[peak sierra]

I love this meme a lot. I always laugh at it

[steady wolf]

https://tenor.com/view/pokemon-anime-pikachu-whos-that-pokemon-gif-4107085239852566028

[peak sierra]

Funny enough I picked up Pokémon bandaids from shoppers today 😂

However I feel like us as a system shouldn’t be guessing who we have in our system. Because it feels like we do, cause it’s like we get a subconscious boost of dopamine/serotonin for approval that we do actually have the alter but there’s not any proof they exist.

Like front evidence is null in void

[weak basin]

GG @hybrid skiff, you just advanced to level 10!

[timber gull]

I love sayijt “whos thay pokemon” cause i love pokemon and its a fun way to ask

and even public too, its not suspicious

or I just sign in ASL “who” and then yeah

[midnight drift]

Splitting again only a few months after the last split feels so exhausting. Like we have a pretty high split tolerance and this is the second time in a few months. Is our split tolerance getting lower as we start to communicate more? :/

[peak sierra]

It can happen, especially if others start to front and get used to fronting

Idk though. It happens with some systems for different reasons.

[hollow orchid]

How does one get un-front stuck? I am a nonhuman alter, but stuck in front. I wish to not front for the time being.

Sorry about that, it got frontstuck and we switched

Everythings ok now!

[peak sierra]

Usually you have to ride it out.

I don’t think you can unstick yourself from front.

[timber gull]

this isn’t even all of today. but uhm. woooo-

[peak sierra]

Omg 💀
I don’t think we have ever had a front that full of switches.

I’m sorry it’s been so hectic

[timber gull]

it’s not happened for a while but it was genuinely like. i could not be left alone for more than a minute. and i was doing fine today-

like they’d switch in and out to make sure i was not in front by myself. i know there were triggers but they weren’t exactly day ruining-

i really want a calmer day tomorrow.

Hopefully it will be ^_^

[digital abyss]

i feel u bro

[hollow orchid]

Yea, we definitley did

[digital abyss]

been there indeed

[timber gull]

maybe if i just don’t log the co-con then nobody will be co-con- /hj

[hybrid skiff]

omg😭 I havent seen these two in months and they both showed up at the same time 😭 insane duo (they are both incredibly sweet)

[timber gull]

hii! does anyone have any name suggestions for me? <3
i think i like names starting with P but i'm not entirely sure!

[midnight drift]

Any preference on theme and gendering?

[timber gull]

paige. uhm.

probably fem :D not sure on themes-

word names are cool too

petunia. uhhh.

piper.

[midnight drift]

Poppy
Paisley
Piper/Pip/Pippi
Pheonix
Pheobe
Promise
Pearl
Persephone
Pembroke

[timber gull]

payton. prince/princess. uhm. pandora.

PUCK.

i like that name-

[midnight drift]

Penny
Paris
Petra
Pepper

[timber gull]

penny.

[midnight drift]

Pippa
Pax
Polly
Parx

[timber gull]

presley.

thank u so much both of you !! i'll definitely consider these c:

[midnight drift]

Patton/Pattern
Price

[timber gull]

welcomes.

[midnight drift]

Honestly baby name websites are your friend

[timber gull]

they are.

baby name websites are my besties.

woah-

[peak sierra]

MagicBabyNames is a good site

[hollow orchid]

I hate it when we gotta practice violin and then we switch and the alter doesnt know violin-

[timber gull]

We don’t have that problem… luckily 😭

[hollow orchid]

Yea

[timber gull]

Probably because we’ve done violin since 3 or smth. I don’t know.

We had that problem with Anth and coding though. He would always be fronting during our computing lessons and that never ended well 😭

[midnight drift]

Yeah there's a quote in this server of "me" saying that 'word' is a 4 syllabic word.
Turns out Kai does not know as much about English Lang as I do XD

[hollow orchid]

Lol, I understand

[hybrid skiff]

Its so funny, we love swimming and water but theres one fox alter in our system who HATES water😭😭😂

[timber gull]

i think it’s even worse today somehow-

blurry | 🫧💫 ↩️

[Reply to:](#1151243634876891246 message) this isn’t even all of today. but uhm. woooo- 📎

[digital abyss]

us with piano. and art. and math 😭

theres also a persecutor who drinks milk straight and everyone else hates it

[hollow orchid]

Huh

/lh /g

[digital abyss]

?

like a glass of milk

[hollow orchid]

Im sorry, Im sleepy

[digital abyss]

ur good /gen

off topic but does anyone here make like capcut template memes of system alters

cause we love doin that sm

[timber gull]

Can ya give us an example of what that would be?

¡Void! 🎬 | [SEE BIO] ↩️

[Reply to:](#1151243634876891246 message) off topic but does anyone here make like capcut template memes of system alters

[digital abyss]

cw for yelling ish + 💀 threat

[timber gull]

Haha that’s hilarious xD

[digital abyss]

yee fr we should make more honestly

theyre ridiculously funny

[timber gull]

We don’t have much communication going on within our sys so we don’t know anything about each other to do it 😭

[digital abyss]

valid, its just from noticed interactions and TONS of organization for us

[timber gull]

Yeah

[digital abyss]

another one, cw for loud noises and yelling again + emoji/drawn weapons

[timber gull]

Hehe

Ya know when you think an alter is gone from co-con so you go to remove their SP status and they just go “I’m fucking here ya shithead”… yeah… that was Tommy to us. Dabi was more subtle about still being here 😭

The cons of having so bad communication that you cant tell when people are co-con besides the “I need to wear a binder but I normally like my chest…?”

Should I have said “such bad” or is “so bad” grammatically correct? Ugh. If we have passed our English GCSEs I’ll be so surprised

[hollow orchid]

If you need any english help, Im a part of the school writing center

[timber gull]

Meh, it’s fineee I never have to do it again. Did my exams this year. I should pass them - got an 8 in paper 1 and a U in paper 2 xD (paper 2 was probably a 3 or a 4, just the teacher didn’t wanna give me a grade because she expected better from me 😭)

[hollow orchid]

I get that lol

[timber gull]

I’m so nervous for results day. It’s in 1 month and 14 days. And I have basically nothing to do between now and then

[digital abyss]

felt

[timber gull]

yeah it uhm. was worse.

[steady wolf]

https://tenor.com/view/april-fools-joke-dog-its-fine-this-is-not-gif-16757454

[timber gull]

made some more

¡Void! 🎬 | [SEE BIO] ↩️

[Reply to:](#1151243634876891246 message) off topic but does anyone here make like capcut template memes of system alters

[peak sierra]

It’s a party! Wooo!! /silly-lh

[hybrid skiff]

happens all the time😂

[hybrid skiff]

“So bad” Such bad isnt how its said grammatically ^^ /info

[timber gull]

2 hour long party. pain.

✨ Chronic Jesus ✨ ↩️

[Reply to:](#1151243634876891246 message) It’s a party! Wooo!! /silly-lh

[hybrid skiff]

Oh damn 😬

[hybrid skiff]

holy fuck

[timber gull]

don’t know the trigger for it.

we can guess but like.

can’t pick one out-

[hybrid skiff]

we got like 23 people or something and the MAX people who front is like 5😭

oh damn

[hybrid skiff]

like meaning fronting in one moment, the number of people who would show up would be 5 max

[timber gull]

normally maximum is 3 fronting fronting (not co-con) but we had like. 6 at a time all switching places of control and like. aaaa.

[hybrid skiff]

??? a U?? GCSE? Are you british? /genq /nfta lol

[timber gull]

it was so much.

[hybrid skiff]

Oh jesus christ im sorry

[timber gull]

meh. it’s calm now.

[hybrid skiff]

thats good!

[timber gull]

i’m not gonna remember enough like. to. have any emotional attachment to it. it happened. no idea why. it was painful and stressful and probably caused more issues but it’s fine for now-

i’m really like. happy we had. people like. to talk to during it though. because it made it a lot easier than if it was just us alone in bed or something.

[hybrid skiff]

fair enough

[peak sierra]

I’m sorry. I bet the headache is bad.

[fading path]

HELP i remmeber that 😭

[midnight drift]

Yeah me too it was fucking embarrassing :')

[fading path]

XD

[heady hornet]

I'm back people. I disappeared for weeks but I'm back in business here

Now I gotta rant about tuning this damn guitar

[faint mason]

REAL

[timber gull]

Haha
Been hyperfixating on MHA for 2 months now and have got a Todoroki and a Dabi introject 😭

[peak sierra]

Yep.

Pretty much

[little dew]

story of a good ammount of our alters lol

[steady wolf]

Alex 😭👀

[midnight drift]

What?

[steady wolf]

nothing 😂

who is it? /j

[midnight drift]

I mean I didn't even make the meme I stole it from someone else I just thought people would relate

We don't actually have any fictives, only a couple factives

[hollow orchid]

Im starting to question the validity of our system again, because we cant get diagnosed or tested or anything due to living conditions, and like one of us is co-con all the time, but others take front. We have no amnesia, except for just a tiny bit and im just confused. /nav

[heady hornet]

Same for the front and amnesia stuff but when alters step back they sometimes take memories but other than that I'm always co-con do I know what's happening and that's still totally valid

[weak basin]

GG @heady hornet, you just advanced to level 2!

[heady hornet]

I don't watch movies or play games or anything like that and I don't really hyperfixate soooo

Now excuse me while I cry about this out of tune guitar. I swear its faulty–

[hollow orchid]

Thank you, Im just kinda worried because I can't do anything about our system and I dont even know how to make it functional, especially since we're switching hosts (Im still always co-con...)

[heady hornet]

I'm talking with a psychologist so yea but I still have memory gaps a lot and forget the days before like usual just not much amnesia between switching and stuff like that

[hollow orchid]

I suppose thats the same with me a bit

[digital abyss]

its always the obscure AF stuff for us too like when did my brain decide it would be a good idea to have an introject of a 1999s first person ||shooter|| game mod which was based off of a book called House of Leaves

like maybe three people know it my god

[urban sage]

Helllppp we have been front stuck for like the past 3 months AND THE DOOR TO LEAVE IS LOCKED!!

[peak sierra]

I mean. I am an introject and the main host. So I get the issue. We also have Left4Dead fictives I think. Unless they are gone and merged now. Unsure.

That’s really cool though to have an alter from that kind of game.

[midnight drift]

We have 3 introjects from the same place if I'm correct? All split at different times but I suppose the brain just really latches onto it

[peak sierra]

Hm. I think one of us recalls you talking about that. I don’t have access to that though.

We have a few factives, so far only 1 hasn’t shown.

[timber gull]

TW: Grief, Loss, d**th, Losing A Friend
||So, one of our long term friends has passed on. He was well known within the system and supported us through a lot. We have known him since 2015 so this loss comes as a total and utter shock. He was 24. He was very close to one of our younger system members. Her name is Mouse and she has known him since 2016. However her mental age is between that of a 4-7 year old. How do you explain this subject or this topic to a younger system member whilst keeping sensitivity and taking into account their mental age. She is already asking why he isn't replying when she messages him and calls him.||

[heady hornet]

Simplify

Like saying that the friend is gonna be away for some time or smthn

[dusky solstice]

Dissociation sucksss....

I'm sorry I don't have DID but it does

[timber gull]

Yeah this is what I was thinking of doing, someone else said to be upfront with it but I can't do that at this moment because I don't know what the effects would be on the system?

🌸 Orchestra • System 🎶 ↩️

[Reply to:](#1151243634876891246 message) Like saying that the friend is gonna be away for some time or smthn

[timber gull]

Is there any way to just not be host

…asking for a friend /j

[timber gull]

Just leave front. That’s what I did 😭
Worked for a day and a half then I’ve been here since again (only almost 2 days luckily)

[timber gull]

I miss our long hair :(

[midnight drift]

Hosting for a relatively internal based system is so weird sometimes because rn the system is in absolute chaos, new splits, old memories, broken trust, burn out, inner world changing ect ect and I'm just over here dancing to club music making pasta like

https://tenor.com/view/this-is-fine-gif-24177057

[timber gull]

After a few weeks of being calm, this happens…
Luckily most of us are only co-con

[timber gull]

That doesn’t really work for us unfortunately haha

Harmony || They/She 🎶🧮 ↩️

[Reply to:](#1151243634876891246 message) Just leave front. That’s what I did 😭
Worked for a day and a half then I’ve been here since again (…

[heavy steppe]

Yeah my system mates can't just leave front either there has to be a reason

[timber gull]

lucky for them I’m here instead for some reason lmao

Ari-they/pup/stripe ||BIRDS ↩️

[Reply to:](#1151243634876891246 message) That doesn’t really work for us unfortunately haha 📎

[glass axle]

i have a question: Has anyone dealt with an alter having a crush on another alter before?

[weak basin]

GG @glass axle, you just advanced to level 5!

[peak sierra]

Yes. Intersystem relationships are common. Especially in polyfrag systems

We don’t though

[glass axle]

interesting! We've never heard anyone talk about those

[hollow orchid]

Yup. 2 of the alters in our sys were in a relationship

[royal walrus]

So true :-:

[faint mason]

REAL

they Love to front when we’re needing to do things

the amount of tests i’ve taken through co fronting with a 3 year old is astounding

[timber gull]

it’s so difficult to have littles some days tho I love them

[heavy steppe]

So true I have one co fronting and my husband said she was being very cute during our movie date hugging her teddy and rocking

[heavy steppe]

Yes it can be especially when you have to use your big girl voice and try to get them to co front if possible because it's not always safe for them to be out by themselves

[timber gull]

100%, I love my littles so much their the world to me but it’s so difficult if they come out in public such as school, big hangouts when people don’t understand that a little is fronting, or just going out to eat. Their so sweet but people just don’t see them as their own person sadly

Forgetful Nonbinary cat (Sorry) ↩️

[Reply to:](#1151243634876891246 message) Yes it can be especially when you have to use your big girl voice and try to get them to co front if…

awwwwwww, the littles are just so cute :3

Forgetful Nonbinary cat (Sorry) ↩️

[Reply to:](#1151243634876891246 message) So true I have one co fronting and my husband said she was being very cute during our movie date hug…

[heady hornet]

I think we've always acted childish because our mom doesn't notice and I can step up and talk most of the time and sometimes we just don't talk so people don't notice anhthing

[timber gull]

just spoke to mum and remembered halfway through talking that i should probably tone down how i talk

she didn’t notice anything

to be fair though i don’t talk that different to ryn

[heady hornet]

When we talk to mom Mara get pulled front always

Mother make Mara go out

[timber gull]

People who ask for alter counts infuriate me. Like why’d ya wanna know I have ‘x’ number of alters?

[peak sierra]

I mean I do get it to some degree. Especially if they want to be friends, because then they know what they are dealing with in the sense of how many alters will they have to meet and remember.

[timber gull]

I know. But someone random who just joined a server asking?

[fading path]

ig they might just not know any better.

[timber gull]

Yeah. Just infuriated us so much

It wasn’t even us who was asked

[fading path]

i mean idk your situation but personally i wouldn't really mind if i was asked that

some people are just more curious than others and i personally appreciate any questions as long as they're respectful and don't push for answers if denied

[hybrid skiff]

Valid, I wouldnt say it upsets me but its like “oh uh okay” 😂 I don’t blame them for being curious but I’ve been asked a couple times and I just give a random guess of how many we have 😭💀

[hybrid skiff]

Mhm yeah

how we doing mitosis members (im sorry)

[midnight drift]

I'm uncomfortable with people asking about specifics of my system unless they know me.

Broad questions are fine but I keep my system very heavily guarded for safety so if someone pushes for info it feels violating

[hybrid skiff]

Thats valid

Sometimes I don’t mind the questions but it can get way too much quickly. They don’t understand how intrusive it can be 💀

I had to block this one guy cause he kept referring to alters like they were to be “used” like they were tools, it was fucked😭 I know he was learning but it was just getting too much and he kinda just romanticized DID too 😟👎👎 Me and my friends were like “yeah no you’re getting kicked😭👎”

[midnight drift]

A lot of my system is either vulnerable (making sharing info dangerous) or has a job/purpose/other trait that needs to be kept hidden to still function and keep us safe

[midnight drift]

that's so gross I'm sorry that happened to you.

[fading path]

wtf 😦

[peak sierra]

Yeah uh, that’s dangerous to have around for many reasons

[hollow orchid]

How do you get an alter to front for a surgery recovery??

[peak sierra]

We are starting to realize that other people’s heels don’t hurt constantly when they stand too long. Wearing shoes and wearing gel insoles don’t help.

[heady hornet]

Wait that's not normal?

[peak sierra]

Apparently not

[timber gull]

does anyone know of a DID channel that uploads occassionally? I don't want to watch anyone problematic

[heady hornet]

Cypytid ink? Idk how valid they are just randomly saw them

[heady hornet]

Damn-

[fading path]

I feel like I'm going crazy. I feel like I have the same name and look EXACTLY like a certain character. But I know NOTHING about them??? No idea if i'm just wrong, if i'm not then why am I like this??

[heady hornet]

I think you can be an introject of them but not know anything about them. Correct me if I'm wrong someone

[fading path]

I don't get why I would be though

[peak sierra]

Other than
The Entropy System and The Rings System idk
They aren’t too active though

[digital abyss]

he said that to one of our middles who holds trauma in that realm 💀💀🙏

[hollow orchid]

✨Nobody wants to front ✨

[hollow orchid]

we literally have so many non human alters. this is insane haha.

[coral flint]

We think we might have a trauma holder being hidden from most of us cause someone keeps fronting occasionally in a constant state of panic and responds to a different name than our ‘main’ trauma holder but they also either blend with us a ton or we just can’t hear what they’re thinking

[heavy steppe]

God the pain of my ears is causing me to feel more foggy with my memories due to I can't focus on anything but the stinging in them and it's sending everyone out of wake in my system 😞

[hollow orchid]

hey, so does anyone know how to choose a name, set of pronouns, and gender? i'm new, but im not human so i've never gotten the experience to do those.

[timber gull]

Hi guys. Poor host has a double ear infection and is over stressed and in a lot of pain 😞

[hybrid skiff]

I know it was so incredibly fucked up

[hybrid skiff]

I’d look up a theme you like and find names, pronouns and such to fit that ^_^

[digital abyss]

we got a few of those, one of our sillies uses three names but one of them is just "41" , sometimes non-traditional names work. Another one of our non-human uses it/its pronouns.

[hollow orchid]

ok, thanks! im a doll, so we can start there!

[hollow orchid]

ooh! i will have to check that out!

[hollow orchid]

(and source is a song called dumb dumb by maize)

[digital abyss]

we love that song

[hollow orchid]

we do too

[timber gull]

:O i love that song :D

Duck Lord (pls @ reply) ↩️

[Reply to:](#1151243634876891246 message) (and source is a song called dumb dumb by maize)

[hollow orchid]

: )

[heavy steppe]

Feel like a switch will happen tonight because something extremely stressful is happening right now 😢

[dusky solstice]

Hope it gets better ❤️‍🩹

[heavy steppe]

Thanks me to. We shale see with events

[dusky solstice]

Ofc

[midnight drift]

Boy having my system reduced to simply "voices in my head" was uh.. sure something.

[timber gull]

ew.

Alex [Bug] - @ping me! ↩️

[Reply to:](#1151243634876891246 message) Boy having my system reduced to simply "voices in my head" was uh.. sure something.

[midnight drift]

I mean I get it, it's a mental health assessment, it's just asking about my symptoms

But oh boy was it uncomfortable

[heady hornet]

I just say people in my head and now my psychologist calls them alters but I don't know why I think it was written in our sys journal or something cause it was very random but I refer to them as headmates to him

[peak sierra]

Can Psychiatrists diagnose DID?

I’ve heard many things about psychiatrists gaslighting those with DID.

[heady hornet]

Not sure

I have a psychologist. Can they?

[peak sierra]

Yeah Psychologists are easier than Psychiatrists.

[hollow orchid]

Yup

[hollow orchid]

Is it okay to doubt if I'm a system even though I found proof from when we were a child? (Like I found this notebook from when I was young, and I found a page with 5 different "personalities", listing traits and stuff. And when my friend told us that we may be a system like 4 years ago, our brain felt like it shut down for a week or 2.)

[hollow orchid]

Oh, and the notebook thing was around the time in which body was roughly 7-8 ish. The friend thing was when we were 12.

[heady hornet]

It's okay to doubt but focus on the proof too

[weak basin]

GG @heady hornet, you just advanced to level 4!

[hollow orchid]

alright, thank you

[heady hornet]

That's actually cool you have proof. The only thing I have proof of is anxiety from when I was 11

I meant to say you're welcome ^^

[hollow orchid]

Yea, I honestly dunno if its good enough proof, but it still slays, Ig lol

*It's good enough proof, on my end. You are completely valid ❤️ /p

[heady hornet]

I think it's good!

[hollow orchid]

Thank you

[hollow orchid]

Hi! So, I'm a poet, and I'm starting to bring my experiences to the poems that I write, and I'm making a system series. This is what I have so far.
Difference in One
We all may have the same face on the outside
But as they say, its the inside that counts.
For one may be human, another may not be.
Perhaps another doesn't steer the ship
as well as the former.
But we all are valid in all our different forms,
Despite going against societal norms.

I might make a song eventually about system/ DID/OSDD-1 life but idk

This is not one of my favorite poems btw

[timber gull]

That’s cool!
Emberly (/sys) loved to write poetry but she’s on holiday at the moment so no poetry right now /nav

[dusky solstice]

That's so cool!!

[hollow orchid]

Ahh I gotchu!!

And thank you to both!!

[dusky solstice]

Ofc!!

[timber gull]

Does anyone know how to bring up the possibility of DID to a psychriatrist or psychologist? We've tried inthe past but it's always been denied by them and it makes us feel invalidated

[heady hornet]

Well for us. We just went, talked about trauma and I just randomly started talking about "the people in my head" and let alters write in our journal where there are also intros. When he tries to say anything along the lines of I made them up because I was lonely (not in a rude way I promise he's nice) I disagree he writes something down then ask why I disagree. I explain and yea. He started calling them alters though. Not sure if an alter wrote that in the journal. Haven't had time to check but if not, then he seems to be catching on. He also talked to another alter physically so there's that

[timber gull]

Cool. We're working on a document with alter's introductions on it to show our therapist and hopefully psychologist. Honestly, do you think it would be enough evidence for the psychologist/psychriatrist?

[placid island]

Hi there! Am I able to join this conversation if I’m not diagnosed with this but am very close to someone with it?

I want to better understand

[hollow orchid]

Of course!!

[placid island]

Thank you❣️🥰

It’s interesting to see so far even just the very little I’ve read here so far. So much relatable yet also each so unique.

[hollow orchid]

I'm not diagnosed due to still living within situations, but I feel like as long as your here to help establish good community or for educational reasons, you're chill

[hollow orchid]

I understand! If you want to talk to me about anything, please feel free to DM!

[placid island]

Please lmk if I say something off. I’m still learning and I don’t mean to offend or anything.

[weak basin]

GG @placid island, you just advanced to level 2!

[hollow orchid]

I 100% understand!

[placid island]

Ah. Sorta similar with the person I know. But the therapist believed this was the case so wrote a letter to try to get it covered by insurance for a specialist.

[placid island]

TYSM❣️

[hollow orchid]

Ohh! I understand that!

[hollow orchid]

Of course! : D

[heady hornet]

That's a start they'll need more but that's really good. Apparently a lot need to see a switch too or talk to an alter but not sure

[timber gull]

Does anyone know how to bring up the system to a therapist? We're debating on just flat out saying it, but we are open to other options

[heavy steppe]

I wanted to flat out say it last Friday morning but my psych said who is Sandy aka one of my alters and then I told him about her and the others and he got to meet one. He then said yes they are alters especially since I get amnisia, brain fog, blackouts after my eyes blink and my heart races a bunch causing a switch from situations, I get the feeling of am I in a dream or reality, I also find messages from my alters, food made only they eat and drink, I also find myself in places I didn't even know about and can get out of the state days later and hear all my alters talk in my head. I hear my girls and my girls friend. So we talked about stuff like that and it led to not a diagnosis but definitely that I have alters and symptoms of disorders with alters in them

[timber gull]

I get that. We're looking forward to moments like that too, where alters can be themself in front of our therapist. I think we're worried about the rejection and potentially finding another therapist who is better equiped to handle DID systems

[midnight drift]

Thank you guys for reminding me to text my therapist lol

On the subject I'm between therapists but in the process of being supported to reach out for a diagnosis but the UK is pretty annoying and it's not particularly easy to access these things. Though my current therapists are aware I have done a lot of research into it and put a lot of time into working with my system & fully believe me

Unrelated note;

Anyone have tips for seeing people shit talking the source of your introjects? To be clear the criticism is all fair and true but it still feels pretty awful and feels like being rejected by your wonderful community.

Not quite sure how to deal with that emotionally. I almost want to feel guilty but it's not like we chose our sources? They just are what they are.

[timber gull]

Just remember that you don't have to change yourself to be likeable. People are going to hate regardless of change or not.

[peak sierra]

That may actually help our current host with a lot of stuff.
I’ll let them know about this.

Thank you

[timber gull]

No problem! We used to struggle with the same thing with our introjects and I love to remind them that they are loved by our system, regardless of their source

[peak sierra]

What name comes to mind when people see this?

[faint mason]

i have no reason for this but jasper was my first thought

[peak sierra]

XD what’s it with us and having so many connections with the name Jasper

[peak sierra]

I love it though

Cause Jasper is a favourite stone. One we feel called to a lot.

[faint mason]

nice!!

one of our protectors names is our great great grandmothers favorite flower but we didn’t know that until after and it feels so intentional now

[peak sierra]

That’s cool

[timber gull]

That's so cool!

[heady hornet]

The Denial that hit after reading this-
Knowing we have a lot of amnesia just emotional amnesia mostly and I basically can't leave front as host so I keep memories and it feels like I'm there when other alters are fronting but I'm not controlling the body fully but as I found out in my psychologists office I usually have physical control whole alters control the thoughts at front and the mouth but damn the questions of faking hit different (not blaming anyone here. Just sharing)

[timber gull]

eating an ice lolly while co-con has become a mild challenge because i bite them and fran doesn’t like that because it’s too cold but i don’t like the sound of eating it any other way so i gotta bite it so we’re just going back and forth between what we wanna do. 😭 /lh

[fading path]

woah

first time we've had someone specific front in a dream and have it be obvious

that's weird XD /neu-pos

well- semi obvious 😭

[heavy steppe]

Not weird to me. It's like they were sending you a message of something

Mine do that a lot

Especially now as we're hurting but also hungry and tired

[timber gull]

Fair

[peak sierra]

I always get so jealous when I read BL manga’s because I’m not a ‘real’ boy. I get so jealous a lot.

It’s like why couldn’t I look like a boy? Why couldn’t I have been born one?

The physical dysphoria gets strong sometimes. I don’t usually notice it too much but some days it hits hard. How much I wish I was a girly boy and not a boyish girl.

Not a vent but I figured system friends might understand better than most here.

[fading path]

bro fr tho 😭

wish shapeshifting was a thing

[peak sierra]

Ikr! It’d be so much easier.

Also heya!

[fading path]

hiiiiii

[peak sierra]

Haven’t been active much. Hoping to set a lot of stuff right. Wherever we can really.

Hope you all are doing ok TCC

Sorry we don’t talk much anymore

[fading path]

fair and we're doing good :D

[peak sierra]

That’s good!

[fading path]

don't be sorry for that it's not like we've been talking in the private server either XD /lh /g

[timber gull]

grounding by singing is very fun.

[dusky solstice]

I agree

[timber gull]

it didn’t work very well haha.

probably would have in other circumstances, but not today. /lh /nav

it does work. everyone’s just. also singing with me-

[peak sierra]

Yeah lmfao

[peak sierra]

Yes, it really is!

[timber gull]

it works but not when, like, you require the assistance of others. i’m so insightful.

[faint mason]

i do this all the time

[timber gull]

much chaos rn

:I very confusing

[timber gull]

Are you alright?

[fading path]

\yeah we're fine lol just feel super tired cuz of it but not much else luckily :3

[heady hornet]

It's been quiet again. The communication was good while it lasted

[fading path]

we have an introject based on someone on social medias but they don't really make themselves known because of that fact, how can we help them feel less guilty about it and make them more comfortable? (and is it immoral to use that person as their proxy avatar? they'd like to do that but feel a bit scared of judgement so some feedback might help.)

[midnight drift]

There's always the possible of judgment but it's very important to remember introjects are not their source. Even if they are extremely similar they are not the source itself. You don't choose who you have introjects of, it just happens.

Short answer: use the proxy if you want to. Only moral issue I would say is if someone asked if you're that person that you should fully explain

Which I'm sure you would

[fading path]

thank you for the reply! /gen

[midnight drift]

Ofc! We also have "controversial" introjects so I totally understand the anxiety. If you want to rant or talk about it my dms are open :)

[peak sierra]

Does anyone else dissociate and aren’t able to like think about anything, like your inner monologue and ability to picture things just vanishes?
(Afterwards being like “Oh, I’m still here, what the heck just happened.”)
But yet you have normal bouts of dissociation that has switches and innerworld movements besides that.

I’m having trouble thinking if it’s random bouts of dissociation or if it’s mild Absence Seizures. I already know I seem to get cluster absence seizures on rare occasions with high intense stress.

[timber gull]

I now own the longest straight fronting time of 8.5 days 😭

[rocky zealot]

\ we have the same issue here! it’s been days and we don’t know how to deal with it.
you could try grounding methods, mindfullness, some physical activity and go out taking some fresh air. orr trying to ground each alter when there’s switches, with pos triggers.
hoping this helps and sorry if not ^^’ (-millie)

[digital abyss]

poor gail went 4 months

[coral flint]

Here’s our longest (a gatekeeper lmao)

[tight flax]

Damn

[hollow orchid]

We once had someone front for around 7 months straight ;-;

[heady hornet]

Relatable, we had one year

[hollow orchid]

Oof, I'm sorry /gen

[heady hornet]

It’s alright, 7 months sounds intense too dude

[hollow orchid]

Yeaa

[timber gull]

Harmony cosplayed me and accidentally front triggered me because she got it wrong at first 😭

[peak sierra]

Kinda helps I guess.

[heady hornet]

Feel like that was dramatic and uncalled for. All I said was oh we haven't had a new alter in ages. Thank god we've been okay and not finding people.

Famous last words...

New alter...😭

[timber gull]

idk if im me or not

i feel like me but also not 100%

then again i haven't fronted in forever (idk how long it's actually been) so maybe im just not used to myself

idk why im here tho 😭

(assuming im actually me)

literally just looked at my old msgs and it's become very obvious that i tend to be very confused about myself and doubting my existence/frontingness

plus im kinda ranting rn which is smth i used to do 💀

LMFAO NO WAY "and i feel so confused about myself all the time and everytime i change just slightly or see myself in a different way to how i think the "past" me was like i get confused about all these things like, am i me? am i stealing someone's identity? am i faking??? am i masking so much that i think i'm someone i'm not??"

bruh im literally so me

kinda crazy

anyway rant over (for now)

this feels weird

whatever

i always feel weird

so maybe that makes me not feeling weird

nvm

bruh what if im not me tho

like i kinda sound like how we've been talking the past few days

so what if im not me but im acvtually just really similar

💀 im scared what if im stealing my identity

wtv

i already said this before idk why im overhtinking it again 💀

why do i sound mean tho

oh nvm apparently im just bad at expressing myself 😭

slay ig

lmao maybe this is why im not the host anymore 😭

[heady hornet]

If u need someone to talk to or rant to my DM’s are open dude

[timber gull]

thank uu 💜 i probably wont cuz scary but i appreciate the offer /gen

(not saying ur scary i just meant socializing is scary 😭 and ik im literally ranting to like 3058290568 people rn but uh... its different i swear- /sil)

[hollow orchid]

Anyone have nonhuman alters that are never comfy within the body? If so, how do you make them more comfortable? (I know a little bit on how to help people who are different ages/ gender than the body, but I don't know how to help when they're non-human.)

[timber gull]

We use makeup to recreate subtly what they’re missing effectively.
Like we did a gothic look for Maya, who’s a demonic alter, and it seemed to help her

[midnight drift]

Making any mirrors easy to cover is a pretty simple one that spans across all of them

[heavy steppe]

kinda my little alter Sandy is part cat

[peak sierra]

There’s a few things you can do ofc, dress with accessories that mimic the things they have.

I’m personally nonhuman but I generally forget about it. Sometimes body dysphoria hits hard.

[hollow orchid]

Thank you so much, all, for the tips!!

[rapid plaza]

any tips on how to tell if you can’t remember things because of brain fog or another issue? i’m starting to wonder if i might be a system

[timber gull]

do research on different things and see what you relate to the most. it could be multiple things or just one. i hope you figure it out.

ali ↩️

[Reply to:](#1151243634876891246 message) any tips on how to tell if you can’t remember things because of brain fog or another issue? i’m star…

[rapid plaza]

i want to bring it up with my psychiatrist but she’s already recommended me for like 3 outpatient treatments and i feel like she’s tired of me

[hollow orchid]

I think we just switched hosts-?

[peak sierra]

Honestly a psychiatrist+psychologist/any kind of doctor, are there to serve you, you do not serve them.

[rapid plaza]

i know. i just get really anxious about it now because i had a doctor tell me everything was in my head for years until i switched and my new doctor believed me.

i usually have pretty bad social anxiety too i kinda thought i would never convince myself to talk in this server 💀

[timber gull]

that sucks. /gen

ali ↩️

[Reply to:](#1151243634876891246 message) i know. i just get really anxious about it now because i had a doctor tell me everything was in my h…

[hollow orchid]

I agree with Emery /gen

[rapid plaza]

yeah. it’s been rough. sorry to bother you guys tho? if it was bothering? sorry

[hollow orchid]

It wasn't bothering! Its all good!! /gen

[timber gull]

you aren’t bothering anyone. if you want, there’s a venting chat. you need the role for it, that’s in #🐞pick-your-roles and you can vent in there if you need.

ali ↩️

[Reply to:](#1151243634876891246 message) yeah. it’s been rough. sorry to bother you guys tho? if it was bothering? sorry

[hollow orchid]

I'm sorry if I'm being a bit obnoxious, but I think we just switched hosts and there was a split-

[timber gull]

i saw the message i just don’t really know how to respond to that. /lh

[hollow orchid]

I'm like actually hoping that it wasn't the former(?) host that split because they identified the most with the body /nav

[rapid plaza]

do you know anything about you right now? or how we could help?

[hollow orchid]

Its okay, I didn't expect responses

[hollow orchid]

I'm okay, I just wanna know how to stop the headache that the split is bringing 👍

[rapid plaza]

i have chronic migraines. i think ice water and peppermint usually help?

[weak basin]

GG @rapid plaza, you just advanced to level 1!

[timber gull]

completely ignore it. 👍 /j
(it’s awful advice but that’s what we do. never take our advice, it normally sucks. /lh /hj)

Duck Lord (pls @ reply) ↩️

[Reply to:](#1151243634876891246 message) I'm okay, I just wanna know how to stop the headache that the split is bringing 👍

[hollow orchid]

Lol thanks!! /gen

[timber gull]

simply plural group organising is going well.

i don’t know why i did a peach, i just felt like it, it looks amazing.

[hollow orchid]

It slays! /gen

[timber gull]

it’s funny, because none of the members of that group are entirely comfortable (gender wise) being called bro haha.

[rapid plaza]

making everyone uncomfortable is equally as accessible as making everyone comfortable i guess

[timber gull]

heh.

[peak sierra]

Yeah. I’m sorry you’ve gone through gaslighting about it

Omg 😂

The names are a mood

Instead of “the bros!” I read “The bread”

[timber gull]

it’s the personal section, it’s all the stupid names i give groups lol.

i like that.. might steal it..

✨ Chronic Jesus ✨ ↩️

[Reply to:](#1151243634876891246 message) Instead of “the bros!” I read “The bread”

[peak sierra]

Lmao 😂

[timber gull]

i do worry about emery occasionally. /lh

the bread is just it and adam.

[rapid plaza]

it seems sweet so far

fun to talk to even on rough days type thing (person?)

[timber gull]

i think person is fine. /gen

ali ↩️

[Reply to:](#1151243634876891246 message) fun to talk to even on rough days type thing (person?)

i dunno what’s going on i just. got. here. again.

music. 👍

[rapid plaza]

emery was showing off its group names. carson doesn’t approve i think

but i’m sure emery is still a lovely thing and or person

[timber gull]

I have avoided most times to talk in here as I don’t feel comfortable with my source self. I do like the empire and doing what I do for a living… but seeing what I’d done… scares me sometimes. Imprints in the brain. Like I’m going mad. /nav
I figure I should speak just to let others with a bad source, know they aren’t alone in that… even if you have the same..habits, or not.

[rapid plaza]

youre still a good person and or thing ❤️

[timber gull]

Entirely. Remembering you aren’t entirely your source can help you know better choices can now be made. Even if you are closely tied to something not good.

carson’s disapproval is because of an inside joke within the system i think. /info

ali ↩️

[Reply to:](#1151243634876891246 message) emery was showing off its group names. carson doesn’t approve i think

i don’t know if emery is ok with being called a thing. but i do know that it doesn’t mind being called a person. please just use person. /nm /info

ali ↩️

[Reply to:](#1151243634876891246 message) but i’m sure emery is still a lovely thing and or person

[rapid plaza]

i think carson was the one that called everyone chaos earlier so that makes a pretty good amount of sense

[rapid plaza]

got it. thank you 😜

[timber gull]

i have no idea what that means and i don’t wanna know because it’s probably gonna cause more disruption for me to know. /nm /nav

ali ↩️

[Reply to:](#1151243634876891246 message) i think carson was the one that called everyone chaos earlier so that makes a pretty good amount of …

[rapid plaza]

nm?

[weak basin]

GG @rapid plaza, you just advanced to level 2!

[timber gull]

not mad.

ali ↩️

[Reply to:](#1151243634876891246 message) nm?

[rapid plaza]

oh good. lowkey terrified everyone here is going to hate me but im ignoring that

[timber gull]

there’s a list of tone tags in #🌿how-to if you need to check.

also, can you please pick some roles? #🐞pick-your-roles

ali ↩️

[Reply to:](#1151243634876891246 message) oh good. lowkey terrified everyone here is going to hate me but im ignoring that

Probably not.

ali ↩️

[Reply to:](#1151243634876891246 message) oh good. lowkey terrified everyone here is going to hate me but im ignoring that

[rapid plaza]

i dont really feel like any of the roles fit me right now. i feel like i dont know anything about myself and its almost scary to figure it out?

[timber gull]

At least an age role and what you mostly know would help and what you want to have access to.

[rapid plaza]

yeah

[weak basin]

fishbxtch has been warned

Reason: ignoring rules

fishbxtch has been warned

Reason: ignoring people who say that something you do on purpose makes them uncomfortable

[timber gull]

can someone help me with a name? /nf

i’m not really sure what i want, i just want a name.

[midnight drift]

Masculine, feminine, neutral?

Could try baby name websites for massive lists

[timber gull]

i have a name, i just don’t like it but i don’t really know what to go for otherwise.

i’ll try baby name websites, thank you. /gen

[midnight drift]

Np

[timber gull]

she found one.

[midnight drift]

Aye good job

[hollow orchid]

Hello fellow systems!! How are we doing? -Liv

[timber gull]

uhhhh.. proxy sums it up.

i rule supreme now. ||fuck|| the confusion.

[timber gull]

thank you.

Alex [Bug] - @ping me! ↩️

[Reply to:](#1151243634876891246 message) Aye good job

[midnight drift]

Pretty cool name, we had someone consider it too :)

[timber gull]

she’ll probably change it tomorrow.

[hollow orchid]

Ayo we once had a caretaker named Nova!!

[timber gull]

ran (nickname for nova, don’t ask) isn’t very good at sticking with things. including in front. /t /lh

[hollow orchid]

I understand that

[timber gull]

i feel very 🧍 in this conversation because i have no idea what i’m doing. 😭 /lh

i’m just here.

[heady hornet]

Hiii

[peak sierra]

Alive to say the least. -Val

[timber gull]

carson was wondering if anyone else speaks/whispers to themselves out loud like. when they are in front. because everyone (except me) seems to do it a lot. and he was wondering. and then he left- because i think he forgot but i somehow remember- anyways. not the point. i. can’t think-

if that made no sense then i can clarify what i mean when i can think better-

Well, talking to yourself is normal, however not everyone does.

[peak sierra]

Yes we do way too much

[heavy steppe]

My littles do that more then Astrid she is the quiet behind the seens type

[timber gull]

i have an explanation but i don’t know how to word it

more like we

because it’s not my explanation

or possible explanation

[hollow orchid]

Yup! Its the primary form of communication for us, since our system sucks at communication

[timber gull]

i think it might be a form of communication for us. i’m not sure though, i haven’t spent a lot of time at front.

[timber gull]

Definitely! not just for communication but for like just functioning in general- like we zone out or get distracted a lot so we talk to ourselves to keep us back on track, kind of like narrating what we're doing /info

ryn | ask prns | 🫧💫 ↩️

[Reply to:](#1151243634876891246 message) carson was wondering if anyone else speaks/whispers to themselves out loud like. when they are in fr…

[peak sierra]

Are there any outside activities to do with systemmates that’ll improve the want to communicate?

[cursive blaze]

I have a question! Do alters ever switch in the discord? If so how do I know who I’m talking to? I know about DID but like talking to a system online kinda confuses me because I cant see that something happened. Also how often do different alters come out in a day? Could you go an entire day with only one person in the body? I watch videos and stuff about systems but I've never met one so I don't really understand from experience what happens

[peak sierra]

On Discord we use a think called Pluralkit, to show who is fronting or we tag it like so;
-Seven (as an example)

It varies from system to system who is active.

Yes being an entire day or week or month or year being front is called being frontstuck

[cursive blaze]

Does pluralkit change you profile name or something

[cursive blaze]

What is it like for you? /nf

[peak sierra]

Yeah. Profile name and profile picture. It creates a proxy or a double of it that replaces your messages with the proxy.

[fading path]

it doesn't change the actual account but it does make a seperate profile (not an actual account)

[timber gull]

(as an example, if u click on this proxy's profile nothing really comes up cuz its not an actual "account", also the APP thing next to the name)

[peak sierra]

For us it varies. We have a large system so it’s hard for communication. As well we have our innerworld blocked off visually so we can’t see it but instead feel it there. Most of us have the same experiences believe.

[cursive blaze]

Was that a way of saying you don't know?

[fading path]

no it's their way of saying it varies 😭 /lh

[peak sierra]

We also don’t have much internal communication and we usually don’t hear each other all that much nor communicate. There’s a lot of amnesia barriers but that seems to lessen when a relevant memory is needed to be brought up because of how we cope with our amnesia.

[cursive blaze]

Lmao

[peak sierra]

It’s rough for us but it’s something that we don’t tend to think much about. Though when we do it generally causes minor headaches

[fading path]

it really does depend on the system though

[fading path]

there are systems with no amnesia, lots of amnesia, a few alters, many alters, good communication, bad communication, frequent switches, very rarely switch, etc etc

so you can never really look at systems as a whole in just one way

[peak sierra]

Yep!

That’s a better explanation

[fading path]

:3

[cursive blaze]

Can you use the pluralkit to demo what it looks like when using or is that not allowed?

Also thank you for indulging in my questions it's quite complicated to understand ♥️

[peak sierra]

What do you mean?

[fading path]

i mean i'd say sure, if you wanna be careful about it you can just make your own server and do it in there but obviously just don't use it after that

[peak sierra]

Yeah what TCC said. It’s for system use only cause it’s a safe space. Lots of people use it for characters and roleplaying though 💀

Which is just morally wrong

[cursive blaze]

Oh okay I'm sorry

[fading path]

(personally if it's in a private server specifically for roleplaying i don't think it's a big deal; but in here it's definitely not the use for it)

(i'm not gonna get into that arguement though XD /lh)

[peak sierra]

I agree. But with that it’s different scenarios for sure

I’m not arguing. 😌

[fading path]

heh, just making sure XD

[peak sierra]

Sorry if it seemed like I was. I was agreeing lol

[fading path]

nah it didn't :D

you're good /g

[peak sierra]

Good good 👍🏻😎

[timber gull]

Supp

[heady hornet]

Oh wait that's my proxy

Btw

[timber gull]

It's time to go..
It's 10: 50 pm

[peak sierra]

Mara. You, are really pretty.

[coral flint]

Hey random question what’s your guys stance on people who say they’re an endogenic system
(They piss me off but I’m tryna word the question in a neutral way)

[timber gull]

prettu sure you and i have talked about it but idk what i said so i agree with you that i dont like them

[coral flint]

lol

[hollow orchid]

I don't like them. They also piss me off

[timber gull]

If they’re gonna be a ‘system’ they can’t use DID/OSDD because they didn’t form the dissociative barriers needed as a child

Raven sys (||BIRDS) ↩️

[Reply to:](#1151243634876891246 message) Hey random question what’s your guys stance on people who say they’re an endogenic system
(They piss…

[midnight drift]

I'm not going to get into the biology because we all already know that but there is one perspective that helps me to take it easier:

Amnesia. Some systems will experience amnesia and denial so severe that they are completely unaware of any trauma leading them to believe they are endogenic when they are, in fact, not.

[coral flint]

Yeah that’s my one perspective that makes me focus on just not interacting with them rather than being rude

[midnight drift]

I personally do not have the capacity to interact with them in any way that is not cruel so I choose to block and ignore. It does not help anyone to argue

[coral flint]

Yeah

[tight flax]

Yea fhats fair

[timber gull]

Well it's proven that it's impossible for a system to form without trauma, as well as it cannot form after 6 - 9 years of age (roughly). It's more likely they have MADD and/or a similar disorder often is often misdiagnosed as DID/OSDD, such as OCD, panic disorder, or other dissociative disorders. OR, they're just people pretending to be a system.

Raven sys (||BIRDS) ↩️

[Reply to:](#1151243634876891246 message) Hey random question what’s your guys stance on people who say they’re an endogenic system
(They piss…

[coral flint]

Yeah that’s what I think as well

[tight flax]

Yea that makes sense

[timber gull]

If they got misdiagnosed, I wouldn't be pissed as much as them thinking being a system is "fun" and "unique" after what they saw on social media. /srs

[hollow orchid]

Yeah

[tight flax]

Yea

[hollow orchid]

Imma go eep now! Gn, all! Love you guys!! /p

[tight flax]

Byeeee

[timber gull]

i just want to say that you can’t always see that a switch has happened when talking to someone irl. it can be very quick and very subtle and/or something easily hidden. i get your point but also just keep this in mind. /nm

Cecilia ↩️

[Reply to:](#1151243634876891246 message) I have a question! Do alters ever switch in the discord? If so how do I know who I’m talking to? I k…

[peak sierra]

Endo are not valid
Systems are created by trauma only.

[heady hornet]

Tysm! Not exactly a face claim as I identify with the body but more of my personality

[heady hornet]

Always found it weird and just straight up dumb people go around paying they have a trauma based disorder with no trauma. An ex friend claimed to be one which I tried to convince her that it was a harmful label but I gave up and decided to let it go but then started invalidating trauma so I was like nope and got the he'll outta there. Her argument was that mental health issues caused it and I inquired about possible trauma she was missing but there is nothing other than happiness and then anxiety from the life story she told me bit I still won't judge

Basically they are not valid

[heavy steppe]

Wow so kinda like me with that Ace person I told you about. People really need to not fake disorders it's so messed up

[heady hornet]

Yeah

[peak sierra]

That’s still cool!

[peak sierra]

Wait what?

An Ace person faking being ace?

[heavy steppe]

No that is their name

[heady hornet]

Ig so lol

[peak sierra]

Ohhh XD

[heavy steppe]

Yeah

[heavy steppe]

Very overstimulated on the bus and my littles are screaming let me out. This is one interesting time for us

[heady hornet]

Oof

|| || <--- hug

[timber gull]

we had an interesting experience in a stationary shop today, there were cute pencil holders and notebooks and the younger ones got a little excited.

[heady hornet]

Oop

[heavy steppe]

I got my littles to sleep so it's a bit quieter right now

But someone is yelling on the bus so hoping it doesn't wake them up

[peak sierra]

Having separation anxiety is an interesting experience being an adult. Especially with my mom.

It’s not easy. Flipping between not wanting anything to do with her but also not wanting to leave her side in fear of losing her again.

The life of a Traumagenic system with Quiet BPD is utter chaos.

[heady hornet]

This is so real

I felt that

[dusky solstice]

Hi guys I have a question

What misinformation did DissociaDID spread?

[hollow orchid]

Can you please elaborate?? Sorry, I didn't quite understand!! /nm /lh

[dusky solstice]

DissociaDID is a channel based on educating people about DID, and I sent a video by them in the #📷pics-and-videos channel but someone said she spread misinformation before and I just want to know what it was

[hollow orchid]

Ohh, that makes sense. I personally don't know anything about DissociaDID so I cant help, I'm sorry!

[dusky solstice]

Oh that's fine

[timber gull]

If you know who said she spread misinformation, maybe you can ask them? /nf

ArtisticNerd417 ↩️

[Reply to:](#1151243634876891246 message) Oh that's fine

[dusky solstice]

Good idea

[heady hornet]

Should I use my proxy when I talk here? I feel like I want to but just want other opinions cause why not

[timber gull]

You don’t have to. /g

It’s really just up to personal preference.

[timber gull]

totally unrelated but related to your misunderstanding; i had a friend who said they were ace but then she apparently told my other friend (it was a friend group of three including me, also they were dating at the time i aint gonna get into that mess tho) that she didn't actually think she was and that being ace isnt real 💀

✨ Chronic Jesus ✨ ↩️

[Reply to:](#1151243634876891246 message) An Ace person faking being ace?

wrong proxy

[fading path]

jumpscare 😭

also the other friend in question is ace so 😬

i was like damn out of ALL people 😭

god, i have so many stories about that girl it's honestly insane 🤣

[peak sierra]

Oml I’m sorry

[heady hornet]

I'm Ace lol

[heady hornet]

But the problem is idm either way but also kinda wanna use my proxy but I find it annoying sometimes so I probably just wouldn't use autoproxy but I just wanna hear others opinions. Kinda like a poll

I have the perms to but am I allowed to make a poll?

[rapid plaza]

i vote do it and see if stan yells at you

[heady hornet]

Lol

[heady hornet]

I did it

[peak sierra]

Up to you honestly. No one can force you but we can simply encourage you to do what makes you happy.

[heady hornet]

I honestly don't mind. I'm really really indecisive so I ask for opinions instead because it would take at least a month for me to decide lol

[peak sierra]

As long as it helps you in the long run.
A physical bullet-journal-like pro’s and con’s list may help too

[heady hornet]

Yea bit I'm kinda not home and also just don't have that motivation right now

The poll said yes so imma use it

[timber gull]

This is it

Imma just proxy and not autoproxy

[dusky solstice]

Hi guys

So I'm looking for a YouTube channel that can educate me better on DID

Just wondering if you guys know any good ones

[midnight drift]

Have a look at multiplicity and me

[dusky solstice]

They already fused though

[timber gull]

their videos from before are still there?

[midnight drift]

Doesn't mean the content doesn't exist or is wrong?

[timber gull]

we watched a lot of the rings system too.

[dusky solstice]

It means they aren't a system anymore

[dusky solstice]

Oh ok

[midnight drift]

False. Their content from before is still valid

[dusky solstice]

True

[midnight drift]

Don't come asking for advice and then bicker about a subject when you don't know anything about it

[dusky solstice]

What?

[peak sierra]

I agree with Alex on that one. Multiplicity and Me seems to be good. I don’t mind their/her content.

[timber gull]

they are an OSDD-1b system so it’ll be different from DID.

ArtisticNerd417 ↩️

[Reply to:](#1151243634876891246 message) Oh ok

[dusky solstice]

Oh ok

[weak basin]

GG @dusky solstice, you just advanced to level 21!

[dusky solstice]

Thank you for letting me know that

[timber gull]

you can see it on their youtube channel and they say it kinda frequently (i think) but just before you start assuming DID systems are the same. if you want to do research on DID alone then i wouldn’t watch their videos because it might get confusing.

[peak sierra]

I don’t think we’ve ever said this but helping people figure out they are systems is a healing feeling. It’s like “I can help those who are struggling! Yay!” But I mean prob going to to help more when we finally fulfill the psychologist dream.

Like we’ve helped 4 (maybe 5?) systems figure it out, and that to us is amazing as heck.

[heady hornet]

Nice!

[wintry trellis]

I am non binary so I use they/them pronouns so when I say that I don't get any confusing looks

[civic iron]

What does that have to do with this forum? /gq

[rapid plaza]

that was the original question!

they also have the alters tag. so they may be a host or just a frequent fronter

[civic iron]

Wait wait I'm genuinely confused the original question? /gq

[hollow orchid]

Adding on, DID/OSDD-1 is very individualized. It definitley depends on the person for how it affects them /lh /info

[weak basin]

GG @hollow orchid, you just advanced to level 15!

[rapid plaza]

for this forum. if you scroll all the way to the top it was about using plural pronouns in front of singlets

[civic iron]

OHH okay okay thank you!! Sorry for the confusion

[rapid plaza]

no problem!

thank you for asking instead of getting violent

[wintry trellis]

It's not the easiest thing to talk about. I feel like I will be judged or get in trouble with the others if I do.

[rapid plaza]

this is a safe space and you can share as much or as little are you’re comfortable with 🩷

i’m proud of you and happy you’re here

[peak sierra]

Well I mean, as long as everyone is respectful about each other’s experiences, I see nothing wrong.

It is difficult to know if you’ll be accepted for who you are or not. But it’s not your fault if others are insecure about your experiences. Though there always must be rationality but most new things don’t sound rational anyway.

The only thing that’s not allowed here I think is Endogenic systems (purposefully self-created systems)

But honestly. No one should be afraid to be who they are unless they are dragging others under them to do it.

That being said others opinions only matter when it’s on something that holds you back and doesn’t lift you up.

[midnight drift]

Friend of mine accidentally called Zero (non human alter) a dog (trigger) and he felt so bad he asked to write an apology in the system journal :')

[timber gull]

Awww

That's so sweet

[peak sierra]

XD Oop. As long as he actually feels sorry for things.

[timber gull]

oh shit😭 im glad he apologized.

Alex [Bug] - @ping me! ↩️

[Reply to:](#1151243634876891246 message) Friend of mine accidentally called Zero (non human alter) a dog (trigger) and he felt so bad he aske…

[digital abyss]

Nonhuman alter named Zero gang

[steady wolf]

hey guys I get there is some frustration but let's try to keep everything nice :)

[steady wolf]

(not to anyone specific btw just in general for everyone)

[civic iron]

Were there other messages? I feel like we're missing context /nf

[finite jackal]

Hello :)

[civic iron]

Hey! How are you??

[finite jackal]

Hi there!!^^ I'm okay and you? :)

[peak sierra]

Missed an argument, but it’s fine.

Ooo Lime is a cool name!

[civic iron]

I'm doing pretty good :) just actually effectively communicated with someone instead of shutting down and switching and that was such a huge thing for us

[civic iron]

Oh that is unfortunate, also thank you!

[peak sierra]

Wooo! Lookit you go!
It’s hard to do at first but it gets easier.

[finite jackal]

Oh cool! That's good to hear! We're proud of you! :DD

[civic iron]

Thank you guys! I hope it gets easier because that was actually very very hard 😭

We'll be more stable when we move in with our mom I know that for sure and that's happening this week hopsefully!

[peak sierra]

It does! We used to be extremely shy and mostly nonverbal as a kid, but over time and self reflection and being positively encouraged by others, it’s helped.

[finite jackal]

You're welcome! :) And oh I see! That sounds good at least :)

[finite jackal]

You're doing great! :)

[civic iron]

Ahhh I'm so glad it gets easier because if it's that hard I would almost prefer just shutting down 😭 /nav I'm so proud of the progress you guys have made!!

[peak sierra]

It’s learning to not fear speaking what you feel and being listened to contently and with curiosity instead of being shut down by others.

It does get a lot easier when you build up the courage hiding within you

You’ll get there! I believe in you!

[civic iron]

I think our biggest thing right now is getting over the feeling that we are going to hurt others and they are going to leave us for it, and we understand why we feel that way and that we have to work on it in therapy

[peak sierra]

Thank you both!
It’s taken a lot to be able to advocate and articulate without resorting to overwhelmed shouting or just shutting down and hiding.

[finite jackal]

You're so welcome! ^u^

[finite jackal]

Valid valid, I'm also working on that in therapy as well ^u^

[civic iron]

Oh for sure we completely understand that!! It's so amazing that you've been able to do that!!

[finite jackal]

You're both doing amazing :)

[civic iron]

I wish you luck! I'm proud of you for realizing that is something to work on!! :)

[finite jackal]

Thank you so much!!^u^ I wish you luck as well!

[peak sierra]

Tip for communication!
Using “I feel this way when you [Action/Word]” statements. It helps a lot! Whether in a positive or negative situation.

[civic iron]

Can you give an example? /gq /nf

[peak sierra]

Positive:
“I feel happy when you ask questions in order to understand me, makes me feel understood and appreciated”

Negative:
“I feel overwhelmed when you ask me all these questions all at once, I’d appreciate it if maybe I could have a pause in between so I can process and properly respond. You deserve an answer, but I need time to think as I have a lot on my plate right now.”

[weak basin]

GG @peak sierra, you just advanced to level 39!

[peak sierra]

Pffft I leveled up! Almost to 40.

[finite jackal]

Wooo! :D

[civic iron]

Ohhh thank you so much!! That actually is incredibly helpful

[peak sierra]

No problem! It can be used in many different examples! I just figured it’d help if I gave a neurodiverse example too. :3

[civic iron]

Yes thank you!!

[hollow orchid]

We're about to have a system meeting over food 😅 /neu

[finite jackal]

Oh dear 😅

[hollow orchid]

It went well!! /gen

[timber gull]

yay!

[peak sierra]

Ah, must meet in the round table for the things that matter most, namingly food 😎 :p /silly

Deciding what to eat is hard though ;v;

[hollow orchid]

Yeahh : D

[hybrid skiff]

once someone ate my birthday dinner at a restaurant I wanted to go to but someone else fronted but its okay I got the good leftovers of our dinner😎

someone btw meaning system

in the system

[timber gull]

theres a few of us who hate certain foods while others love it

maisie likes coffee i think. and i think they are the only one who likes the taste coffee.

ketchup was another one, ryn likes ketchup but i (nova) don’t. so when asked if we wanted ketchup today there was a 10 second thinking period of what do we do. (opted for no ketchup.)

[peak sierra]

Meanie sysmate :p XD /silly

At least you got some which is good!

[peak sierra]

We have an alter who in source likes coffee but doesn’t in our sys and instead likes green tea

[hybrid skiff]

Yeah🤣 Tbf he was freshly new but I wouldn’t put it besides the others to either lolol, I get it though its not like they had a choice since they had to mask lol

It*

[timber gull]

they couldn’t figure out why i started fronting

they are literally listening to my playlist

like what do you expect to happen

[timber gull]

we have a protecter who drinks milk by itself and i HATE that stuff 😭😭😭

blurry | 🫧💫 ↩️

[Reply to:](#1151243634876891246 message) maisie likes coffee i think. and i think they are the only one who likes the taste coffee.

[timber gull]

Milk enjoyer W

🗡 — GAIL ! THEY / ANY — 🎬 ⋆ . ↩️

[Reply to:](#1151243634876891246 message) we have a protecter who drinks milk by itself and i HATE that stuff 😭😭😭 📎

[fading path]

oh fluff no 😭 😭 😭 /lh /sil

[timber gull]

her playlist is good, i’ll be stealing some songs for my own if i make one.

skye | she/it? | 🫧💫 ↩️

[Reply to:](#1151243634876891246 message) they are literally listening to my playlist

[peak sierra]

O - O
I just spaced, heard a song at full volume iw.
And then couldn’t remember what I was doing before I got to my mat.

[fading path]

that's crazy

[peak sierra]

Heck I don’t even know who I am or other memories I have.
I know I’m in a shelter that much.
But oopsies. Amnesia go brrrrrr.

[fading path]

was it a good song tho /hj

[peak sierra]

Yeah it’s a song by ghost and pals

[fading path]

OOOO

very good

hope u can figure things out tho /g

[peak sierra]

We hear it a lot apparently?

Who’s we though…….
Hol up.
I think I know but I also have a headache.

[timber gull]

Gotcha ^_%

*^_^

[peak sierra]

Percent signs would be fun iris shapes.

[fading path]

omg

ur right tho

[peak sierra]

A bit interesting but cool

[timber gull]

i just scared myself with my own accent

[fading path]

lmao XD

[timber gull]

i wasn’t expecting my voice to exist so fast apparently

that was so weird

[peak sierra]

That reminds me of the quote “||Boom! orange juice!||” by Bo Burnham

[timber gull]

i have no idea what that means but yes it is that

[peak sierra]

I kinda like the name Killian
Should I?

I’m unsure, what’d go for a blue haired enby boy?

[timber gull]

lmao we agree its so suprising, esp for our alters with “accents” only like two but still

✨Unhinged Undead ✨ ↩️

[Reply to:](#1151243634876891246 message) That reminds me of the quote “||Boom! orange juice!||” by Bo Burnham

hell yeah

✨Unhinged Undead ✨ ↩️

[Reply to:](#1151243634876891246 message) I kinda like the name Killian
Should I?

[hollow orchid]

Yess

[heady hornet]

Hear me out. What if I'm faking and subconsciously made people up in my head?..

[timber gull]

we are half german and our late grandmother was born in germany along with my father so one of our alters formed with a german accent 🤣

[peak sierra]

I like Killian but strangely also like the name Billie 😂 I think it’s cause of Billie Eilish or something else.

[timber gull]

Not possible unless if its another condition then again sounds more a question for a therapist, but you can’t intentionally fake

🌸 Orchestra • System 🎶 ↩️

[Reply to:](#1151243634876891246 message) Hear me out. What if I'm faking and subconsciously made people up in my head?..
(Daily denial)

[heady hornet]

Oh..

[peak sierra]

Makes sense, our great and great great grandparents were Scottish. Well one part of them. Mostly British.
How do I know that..

[timber gull]

You arent faking

🌸 Orchestra • System 🎶 ↩️

[Reply to:](#1151243634876891246 message) Oh..

Lmao

✨Unhinged Undead ✨ ↩️

[Reply to:](#1151243634876891246 message) Makes sense, our great and great great grandparents were Scottish. Well one part of them. Mostly Bri…

[peak sierra]

I agree with Blake I think. Not something you can fake easily.
You generally know fully when you are faking.

[heady hornet]

...

[peak sierra]

I’m glad I know some things about us. 🙂
I hear someone talking to me but it sounds far away.

[heady hornet]

What if...Well my psychologist doesn't seem to be entertaining the idea no matter how much I speak about it but I'm not consciously faking anything

[peak sierra]

That’s not your doing
The psychologist probably thinks systems aren’t real

However I would look into a different psychologist if they still won’t listen.
You can tell them if they won’t tell you what it is then you are finding a new one who can actually help you.

[heady hornet]

He's really good otherwise and he didn't outright dismiss me I think I just need to be more clear. I'll try that and see but I think even if not I'd still keep him cause he's really helpful otherwise and maybe in the future try and find other help

[heavy steppe]

omg I have done that before and it freaks me out

[peak sierra]

Because doctors of any sort work for the patients. Not the patients work for the doctor

[peak sierra]

Ikr!
It seems to have subsided but I feel super weird.

[heavy steppe]

makes me feel like i was yelled at

[peak sierra]

I’m sorry it makes you feel that way.
Hm, maybe that is sort of similar to how I feel.

[heady hornet]

Yea I guess maybe I'm impatient. I'll just wait and see cause so far no diagnosis of anything (which I don't expect so soon). I think I should just be more patient cause he's truly been the best psychologist I've met

[peak sierra]

I feel like I’m not Seven but I just ‘know’ certain bits. Subconscious go brrrr I guess.

[peak sierra]

Maybe. But remember you deserve to be heard. Maybe speak to the psychologist about your concerns though

It’s best to have help with your denial than living in constant stress.

[heady hornet]

I wrote it down in the system journal that I let him read everytime I go so he'll see (I prefer not to talk about certain stuff so i write it)

[peak sierra]

I see. That’ll work hopefully!
I know it’s hard. I believe in you.

[timber gull]

(off topic but kinda on topic) what do people use system journals for?

[heady hornet]

I use mine for intros and I have an emotion wheel so new alters can identify emotions and I have ways to ground in there and also just to write down when dissociating and stuff like that

[peak sierra]

I don’t know, notes to each other, notes on themselves like bio’s etc.

I can only guess. But I think it works that way. Only things that make sense. Dissociation too and venting.
We haven’t used our newer one yet. Though we got self help journals, from what I can recall.

[heady hornet]

I was telling all of this to my best friend (Denial) He's apart of a system too btw. Apparently if I can't make them disappear then I did make them? Interesting

[peak sierra]

…… no?

[hollow orchid]

So uh we found out that we have yet another machine related alter 😭

And its reminding us of a few things /neg /nav

[peak sierra]

Whether you can or can’t. Generally you can’t make your alters, though you can kind of dictate what they become a little, by things you hear or see.

[heady hornet]

That's what was meant by that 🤨

[peak sierra]

Fun….. /sarc
You know you have ||dehumanization|| trauma when….

[peak sierra]

Oh, ok then. Just the way you said it was a little confusing. Sorry.

[heady hornet]

All good I talk weird lol 😭

[hollow orchid]

Yeah, we figured that out the hard way

[peak sierra]

Nah it’s ok should’ve clarified, but all’s good

[peak sierra]

So did we apparently

[heady hornet]

👍

[weak basin]

GG @heady hornet, you just advanced to level 6!

[heady hornet]

Level 6-

Ohhhh new account

[peak sierra]

Woo! Lookit you go! Lol

[hollow orchid]

I don't remember the trauma so I'm going to have to ask the others abt it

*Maybe not. Idk if I wanna know

[heady hornet]

As long as you're safe doing so

[heady hornet]

I learned this the hard way-

[peak sierra]

Nor do I and I feel I shouldn’t go digging.
Pressure headache if I try to think hard.

Yeah do make sure you are safe.

[hollow orchid]

Im probably not going to go digging for it, I will ask the new mechanical alter who they are though, mb what their role is

[peak sierra]

Good luck!
I need to figure that out too.
I feel spacey but not much

[timber gull]

Good luck to both of ya

[peak sierra]

Thank you Mara.

I just did a stupid
I took 2 Tums for acid reflux then opened a mtn dew

[timber gull]

Uh oh

What does that mean?.. 😭

[peak sierra]

Tums are chewables that get rid of high stomach acid by balancing the PH of the acid.
I took 2 then started drinking something acidic.

[hollow orchid]

Oh yikes!! I am so sorry!!

[peak sierra]

Tums and Alke-seltzer’s are bases. When added to acid it counters it.

Ah, don’t be. I did a dumb I shall deal with the consequences. 💀

I would ask why, but sure, why not. 🫂🫂

Hugs are fun.

[hollow orchid]

Hugs are fantastic imo

Also aaaaaaa hi Bunnii!!! /vvvvvpos

[peak sierra]

No no not what I meant. 🥺
I just mean that I’m not in pain atm so I’m ok. I appreciate the comfort though, and I seem to like hugs so I accept hugs. /lh-gen

I’m sorry if that made you feel your effort wasn’t appreciated. That’s not what I meant at all. 😢

I just thought I didn’t need comfort in the moment. Sorry Starrii

[finite jackal]

oh dear, im sorry 🥺 anxiety is kicking my behind today

i didn't mean to upset you

gahhhh

[finite jackal]

also hi duck lord

[peak sierra]

When you have more than two anxious beans in a chat… oopsies.
Anyways it’s ok Bunnii I promise.

[finite jackal]

exactly ;u; hehehe

thankies ;u;

[timber gull]

we forget how many damn of those we have and why until this shows up (too many!!)

✨Unhinged Undead ✨ ↩️

[Reply to:](#1151243634876891246 message) Fun….. /sarc
You know you have ||dehumanization|| trauma when….

[peak sierra]

I mean we have a whole level of animatronic alters I believe. NPC’s mostly, as far as I’ve heard?

[timber gull]

shoutout to the alter whos a mix of species from lab stuff

we all know exactly why they exist 💀

[peak sierra]

Also the body is wired on caffeine
We have had 3 coffee’s, a quarter to about half a DrP and now the mtn dew…. All have caffeine

[timber gull]

oh lord

we found out the hard way we cant have any more coffee or caffeine

under any circumstance

[peak sierra]

Oh hey our host is that.
Though they switch between that and human.
(Not me? Who? What?)

[timber gull]

LOL

✨Unhinged Undead ✨ ↩️

[Reply to:](#1151243634876891246 message) Oh hey our host is that.
Though they switch between that and human.
(Not me? Who? What?)

[peak sierra]

Ah crap. I understand. Must be hard.

[timber gull]

its chill lol

or alot of sugar🤨

🗡 — GAIL ! THEY / ANY — 🎬 ⋆ . ↩️

[Reply to:](#1151243634876891246 message) we found out the hard way we cant have any more coffee or caffeine

[peak sierra]

I’m feeling wide awake. Brain hurts but wide awake.

[timber gull]

i cant hear you my eyes are closed

[⚔] Blake - He/Doc [🥀] ↩️

[Reply to:](#1151243634876891246 message) or alot of sugar🤨 📎

LMAO

the reeses incident

[peak sierra]

I love those emotes! So cute!
Very cool styles

[timber gull]

the what

agreed

✨Unhinged Undead ✨ ↩️

[Reply to:](#1151243634876891246 message) I love those emotes! So cute!
Very cool styles

(this was to blake)

🗡 — GAIL ! THEY / ANY — 🎬 ⋆ . ↩️

[Reply to:](#1151243634876891246 message) the what

[peak sierra]

Oh no. That sounds like chaos haha

[timber gull]

the reeses incident where chaos ated too many and seized on the wrong day /ref

🗡 — GAIL ! THEY / ANY — 🎬 ⋆ . ↩️

[Reply to:](#1151243634876891246 message) the what

lmfaooooo

✨Unhinged Undead ✨ ↩️

[Reply to:](#1151243634876891246 message) Oh no. That sounds like chaos haha

in more ways than one😭

seized the wrong day 💀💀💀💀

[⚔] Blake - He/Doc [🥀] ↩️

[Reply to:](#1151243634876891246 message) the reeses incident where chaos ated too many and seized on the wrong day /ref 📎

I have arrived

For no good reason

[peak sierra]

Best pun I’ve heard on that.

[timber gull]

Im sorry I remembered that and it was so funny 😭 sorry idk if im able to say that joke I just remembered it

🗡 — GAIL ! THEY / ANY — 🎬 ⋆ . ↩️

[Reply to:](#1151243634876891246 message) seized the wrong day 💀💀💀💀 📎

and checks out. i hate that guy (teasingly-- co host unfortunatly)

🗡 — GAIL ! THEY / ANY — 🎬 ⋆ . ↩️

[Reply to:](#1151243634876891246 message) seized the wrong day 💀💀💀💀 📎

its fine lol

[⚔] Blake - He/Doc [🥀] ↩️

[Reply to:](#1151243634876891246 message) Im sorry I remembered that and it was so funny 😭 sorry idk if im able to say that joke I just remem… 📎

okay lol

smartest co host guys (hes not allowed in kitchens)

hulloo

Mara | Any prns 🎶 ↩️

[Reply to:](#1151243634876891246 message) I have arrived

lmao

sup

Mara | Any prns 🎶 ↩️

[Reply to:](#1151243634876891246 message) I have arrived

Supp

🗡 — GAIL ! THEY / ANY — 🎬 ⋆ . ↩️

[Reply to:](#1151243634876891246 message) hulloo 📎

😒

🗡 — GAIL ! THEY / ANY — 🎬 ⋆ . ↩️

[Reply to:](#1151243634876891246 message) smartest co host guys (hes not allowed in kitchens)

giggled

[peak sierra]

We only get what seems to be absent seizures is what they are called I think?

[timber gull]

pnes for us

[peak sierra]

Have yet to bring that up but my doctor seems stressed as is.

[timber gull]

got a service dog for that 🙏

We only have unstable joints

Almost dislocated wrist crawling on the ground

[peak sierra]

Same. Or well weak joints and an unstable shoulder.

[peak sierra]

Oh crap, I’m sorry.

[timber gull]

Nah s all good

✨Unhinged Undead ✨ ↩️

[Reply to:](#1151243634876891246 message) Oh crap, I’m sorry.

We used to the bullshit fr

[peak sierra]

Our wrists hurt when we crawl so we ape-walk it.

[timber gull]

Our shit just be popping outta place

[peak sierra]

I suppose I’m lucky that way that my limbs don’t do that.
I’m so sorry you struggle with that. Must happen at the weirdest times too.

[hollow orchid]

( sorry, we keep leaving convo and come back)

[peak sierra]

That’s ok!
You guys take your time

[hollow orchid]

I'm sorry that everyone struggles with what they're struggling!

[hollow orchid]

we're trying, thank you /gen /lh

[timber gull]

Wouldnt day exactly weird. Just in gym knees and ankles giving out and falling

✨Unhinged Undead ✨ ↩️

[Reply to:](#1151243634876891246 message) I suppose I’m lucky that way that my limbs don’t do that.
I’m so sorry you struggle with that. Must …

[peak sierra]

This.
XD I love how reading that makes my brain feel.

[finite jackal]

We're here for you all /vgen /vpos /p

[peak sierra]

Ouch. I bet.

[hollow orchid]

Yeaa, our brain is lowkey just snoozing

[timber gull]

Thnx

StarriiBunnii 🌌🪐🐰 ↩️

[Reply to:](#1151243634876891246 message) We're here for you all /vgen /vpos /p

[peak sierra]

I can’t speak for the others but I suppose I am here for y’all too : >
Think the others are too, but my sys feels distant to me.

[timber gull]

Ah shit. We gotta get triggered tmr for like 2 hours

[peak sierra]

😴

[timber gull]

Same for all of you

✨Unhinged Undead ✨ ↩️

[Reply to:](#1151243634876891246 message) I can’t speak for the others but I suppose I am here for y’all too : >
Think the others are too, but…

[finite jackal]

You're welcome

[hollow orchid]

We're also here for everyone -blurry (no prns)

[peak sierra]

Oop. That’s not good? (Is that right?)
I’m sorry.

[timber gull]

||Church||
Religion trigger

✨Unhinged Undead ✨ ↩️

[Reply to:](#1151243634876891246 message) Oop. That’s not good? (Is that right?)
I’m sorry.