transdome

[final heart]

I sometimes compare myself to a ravenous creature

But you seem to compare the visuals…. Hmmm….

[dull raft]

its more than just visuals! /nm /info

i also tend to act like a dog

[candid ore]

that lady was so right because in all ways except physical i am a chihuahua

[winter comet]

i still follow wolf girl
she was in a documentary thing recently called furry detectives

[dull raft]

me too! im friends with her on tiktok lol

[dull raft]

very real very me

[jagged quiver]

might be a strange question to ask in a fkn discord server but uhhhhh

do any of y'all have ways youd reccomend going abt getting hrt if u have no real way of getting to an (in-person) doctor/psychiatrist? i do have insurance but nowhere near my university takes it and i do not have a car!

Ive heard theres online options for psychiatrists but idk how reliable they are, and a good amount of the hrt-focused online services are too pricy for my full-time student part-time working arse.

[elder saffron]

@jagged quiver I dont know where you live, but if youre in the US there is Plume and Flox. I personally use Plume. Although you would need a way to get labs done since its absolutely required so I dont know how much that will be an issue since youve mentioned that you dont have a car.

With Plume you dont need to deal with any psychiatrist (dont know about Flox Id assume its the same)

[misty harness]

plume takes some insurance depending on your state. you can check with a planned parenthood near you, but idk pricing with them and they tend to book super fast

[elder saffron]

^^^^

[winter comet]

yeah planned parenthood tends to be a better option for in person but i did struggle with them never taking new patients for hrt so i never got to get on it
you mileage will vary though that was just my experience

i think pp has sliding scale if you dont use insurance

[misty harness]

planned parenthood in my area had a specific day where they'd open booking for the next month, so youd have to call like the minute they opened. idk if its like that everywhere

[jagged quiver]

if its just for one thing there's a chance id be able to get a friend to take me lol

it doesnt look like plume takes my insurance in ohio i fear 😔

and folx does not take mine either

i cld look into getting my work hours up i suppose

[jagged quiver]

closest pp is a good distance away from my campus too

agh

american healthcare system shall be the death of me

seems like my options are getting more hours and thus more money or begging one of my friends to take me to places LOL

[winter comet]

mine were like super vague all the time about when they'd take new people

i get on my husbands insurance on the first next month so hopefully i can finally get on hrt but i have other pressing health issues to look at first
i think what im gonna do when i get on t is not tell any of my online friends and then join vc after a while

[jagged quiver]

once in a lifetime bit

you shld do it

[elder saffron]

Thankfully it's not to expensive in the long run. $99 a month and it includes them covering lab costs so long as you go through their partnered ones. And then your meds should get covered by insurance too

If not they should cover a large portion of the cost

[magic verge]

adding onto this kind of late but yeah with folx i didn't have to talk to a psych, just had an APRN/nurse prescribe my meds, initial appointment goes by faster if you've previously been prescribed hrt with a diff provider but i think the process is the same either way. i ended my subscription not too long ago though bc my practitioner could not fill out the prior auth correctly for the life of them and when they finally did they sent a prescription for an amount that was different from what was authorized so the script didn't get filled and i had to contact the pharmacy

i assume ymmv and this isn't a problem exclusive to telehealth but it was a huge pain in the fucking ass

i'm lucky enough to be able to get my rx prescribed by my primary care instead but if your only viable options are gonna be telehealth then it's worth a shot

you may be able to use goodrx to get your scripts cheaper or can request a superbill from folx to submit to your insurance for reimbursement if you have out-of-network coverage

[fresh lichen]

haiiiiii >_<

[elder saffron]

Hello

[sudden zephyr]

For what

;-;

[magic verge]

tucking or binding

don't use duct tape for that

[sudden zephyr]

OOHH

That is painful

I don't fuck

Tuck

[winter comet]

i was just talking about this meme not long ago

[next harbor]

Duct tape is for ducts, which unfortunately doesn't include most places of your body

[magic verge]

unfortunate reminder that i am in fact made of flesh and blood and not electrical wire

just starts using heat shrink tubing on myself to bind. really big tube that you step into and hit with a heat gun

[winter comet]

i was mildly culture shocked that so many people in the comments didnt know what tucking was for context

also i witnessed that some people no longer know what the hell mtf and ftm mean
we are losing the recipes 💔 i'm not saying people have to be queer historians but i think a cursory knowledge is important for safety and shit

[magic verge]

yeah and also because there are trans people in the world who still describe themselves in that way

[winter comet]

yes. the amount of younger or newer people going "um did you mean transgender" at people who id as transsexual makes me grit my jaw

[magic verge]

i understand the aversion to mtf/ftm as a descriptor because it inherently involves making a direct reference to your asab but it was the most prolific terminology up until we started normalizing "trans"/"transfem"/"transmasc"

[winter comet]

there are people who categorically (instead of individually) separate nonbinary from trans when it's under the umbrella

i know there are a few people who id as nb and not trans but categorically it's trans

[winter comet]

right and people who prefer this aren't wrong or inherently transmed for it

[magic verge]

this is my motivation to ID as transsexual in the first place lol like i have all the respect for trans folks who don't plan on medical transition but it's really grating when (SOME) non-transitioning trans people act like the arbiters of gender or something

[winter comet]

oh i should add its bc they genuinely are just
ignorant

[magic verge]

dawg we deal with entirely different issues

[winter comet]

ignorance is something that is not always malicious but you need to fix it anyway because it does cause harm

[winter comet]

yeah. like you dont want to medically transition? cool! you still should advocate for access for your community though. it still benefits you

and even if it didnt benefit you you should still care about people in your community that face different challenges than you coughcoughwhitetransfolkscough

[grand hearth]

we went to Jupiter 💔

[digital geyser]

going to a local free trans swim event :D

gonna be just wearing my swimmign costume i think but its a trans friendly space so i dont think that'll be too bad

[jagged quiver]

do they even make a binder equivalent for transfems i feel like ive never heard of that before

which is weird bc it totally seems like the type of thing to exist

like it most certainly does i feel

[winter comet]

tucking panties

there are also probably padded bras that keep inserts in better than just stuffing a bra

im sure some transfems also use waist trainers
so basically if anything transfems could potentially have more compression garments than transmascs lol

[jagged quiver]

LOL thats kinda funny to think abt

[winter comet]

what is

[golden plover]

Also, transfems can get some UNIQLO bras that hold their shape without anything inside, these are usually labeled "comfort bras" or something like that.

[winter comet]

sports bras or bralettes

usually what they're called

[jagged quiver]

idk i just normally think of transmascs as the ones who wear binders and such in my head its a little funny to think that transfems wld have more stuff like that available

ig

[golden plover]

Ohh, not that, it's called "Ultra Relax Wireless Bra" at UNIQLO, and it's a full unpadded bra.

So you don't get as hot in them

[winter comet]

those are basically the same

either that or thats just a normal bra

a lot of them dont have underwire

[winter comet]

feminine beauty standards are a prison 💔
not saying people who like to waist train or tuck are bad im just saying presenting traditionally feminine takes So Much

[jagged quiver]

being transfem is straight up walking into the gates of beauty hell

[winter comet]

even some people who are afab and present very feminine use waist trainers and bra padding because we can't just let fems be

i should also add some nuance to that i'm not trying to make all fem presenting people out to be helpless victims or that people only do dysphoria alleviating things for societal gaze but i do not think its a coincidence that theres a ton of accoutrements for looking "traditionally feminine" if that makes sense

like i would probably still get top surgery even if everyone on earth gendered me correctly and i know that would be the same for someone who tucks for example

[magic verge]

i think this makes sense yeah. it's why i hate people who rag on transfems who want to get certain procedures or present in traditionally feminine ways for "conforming to gender roles" (which isn't the way you were coming off but topical nevertheless). oftentimes it's a question of safety, precisely because the standard set for what a woman should look like is so high

get upset at the system that enforces these standards, not the individuals who choose to conform to them for personal reasons or safety or what have you

[winter comet]

real
we are all products of our culture but because we have these resources why shit on those who access them and not those who make it unsafe NOT to

(but also god forbid a woman have hobbies and likes to have a certain look etc etc)

[west anchor]

Romeo would be a hard tboy name

[winter comet]

true

my actual name is kind of a hard tboy name if i do say so myself

[feral wind]

my trans name tuff

ven

[candid ore]

so is mine

Robert

[winter comet]

i dont use my actual name online so it's just a trust me type deal

[candid ore]

i use my actual name online because. it's not my legal name so nobody can find me

i'll be cooked in 2 years when it IS my legal name but for now idgaf

[feral wind]

same

[ripe burrow]

my name is matthew but thats only the English version, i like the russian version of my name more which is matvey

its just a neater version imo

[candid ore]

the only unfortunate part about my chosen name is that i accidentally picked my dad's middle name and it's been so long i cant change it now

i picked james in 2020 and it's the only part that's stayed so it's gonna stay

[winter comet]

i go by my middle name at work and stuff and it pisses me off when people compare it to another person with that name

[fresh lichen]

HAIIIIII

[elder saffron]

HIIIIII

[carmine cobalt]

i know one of these and it is a hard name

[mossy thicket]

Oh hello machineboys girls and theys

[left rivet]

Hello

[ripe burrow]

hallooo

[mossy thicket]

I finally got a referral to a gender clinic not long ago. I'm far away from my goal but it's nice to finally take the initiative and get things going

[winter comet]

once my insurance kicks in tomorrow and i get some exams for some health concerns ive been having im gonna gun for T asap

[mossy thicket]

I'm so getting a tattoo to symbolise the journey

[mossy thicket]

Get that T bro 💪

[winter comet]

cant wait to get chest acne even worse !!!!!!!!

actually i have a question for the medically transitioning tmascs in chat
does anyone have pcos and is on t

i might ask about pcos

unfortunately i know some guys with pcos have shit endos who want to treat them with E and think if they get "the correct afab hormones" they will simply just stop being trans lmao
so i was curious about the medical experiences around that

[mossy thicket]

Oh I was also wondering something, does it matter if you get top surgery first or going on T first?

Or do you have to be on T first before getting the chesticle chop

[winter comet]

i have seen some people get top surgery without t because some people don't want to be on t at all
but i think for some tmascs it can be easier due to how t affects the chest tissue. but im not a doc and they remove most of it anyway so it could just not really matter it depends on what results you want

[mossy thicket]

Ig I'll consult with the experts

Definitely want to go on T

[winter comet]

most people do happen to go on t first just because it's usually easier to access sooner unlike top surgery

also im sure some areas require hrt before other procedures bc there are still places in the world that make you "prove" you're trans lol

[mossy thicket]

Eek

Okay, then my idea for a tattoo will actually make sense LOL

[winter comet]

reading up a bit it seems like some surgeons prefer patients to have been on hrt but it's not a universal requirement

i do know a trans dude that has gotten top surgery but he's a singer and likes his natural range so he hasn't been on t

[mossy thicket]

I'm not sure how it works in my country

Getting the referral was as easy as two doctor visits

[winter comet]

are you comfortable disclosing which country

[mossy thicket]

Yes

Netherlands

[winter comet]

i'm not familiar with how trans medicine works over there but generally if they work more on informed consent it should be easier

[mossy thicket]

I did hear they would do like an analysis and stuff, to see if I have dysphoria

Will be a piece of cake, I passed the autism assessment with flying colours/j

[winter comet]

it's kinda crazy thinking about the state of trans medicine here in the united states where i am because my husband transitioned as a teenager and back then they made him go through psych evaluations and a lot of other hoops to get hrt, as well as name changing and gender markers on ID cards and stuff
and now that we're adults it's way easier to get shit done here in washington state, like when i renewed my license they asked what i identified as for my driver's license without any need of proof

but i picked female just because i renewed my license shortly before trump took over and i had a feeling it would be safer to keep everything matching my original birth certificate -_-

[mossy thicket]

Man I hope it's that easy here, I heard rumors they're gonna make it impossible to change yiur gender on your ID

Doesn't make any sense they would do that tho so I hope it's just a rumor

[winter comet]

right now because of the trump admin they're definitely trying to make it more difficult to transition, first by making it illegal for minors and then to make it hard for trans adults since they've been harassing people for having "mismatched" genders on documents

passports have been a huge point of contention here in the states

and driver's licenses as well

[mossy thicket]

Oh boy

Here they're more lenient, the doctors let me change my name and stuff on their documents

Will be called as Mr. Last name from now on

[winter comet]

a lot of doctors here in the states have a section where you can choose what gender you identify as and what name you want to use but back when i lived in texas either the doctors are ignorant as hell or the way the forms work just doesn't care to show them that info because i always get misgendered and called my legal name

i also was able to choose what gender and name i identified with at work but there's been a huge mixup about that too

[mossy thicket]

Eughhhj

I wish I could just, make them all explode with my mind

https://tenor.com/view/explosion-cat-gif-5858640239144030160

Man I am kinda dreading "The conversation" with my parents tho

My parents are accepting and all but the fjrst time I said anything about not being a girl my dad cried

[winter comet]

sometimes parents project a little too much onto their kids and perceive transition as some sort of "loss" but many parents if they are truly supportive get over this stage of grief eventually once they see how happy you are being your authentic self. my husband's mom is very supportive but initially years ago she did feel like she was losing some part of him even though his "girlhood" really wasn't a huge defining trait of his and he's the same person just more open about it

also luckily for her she didn't "lose" a daughter at all because my husband's sister came out as a trans woman eventually

[mossy thicket]

Wow okay you're a mind reader

[winter comet]

it will take some time for your parents but if they really are accepting they will learn in time

[mossy thicket]

You're right tho, they will come around

[winter comet]

my mom still sometimes calls me the wrong pronouns but she's never been unsupportive, just stuck in her habits

[mossy thicket]

I've been dressing like a dude and acting like a dude for years, it's not like anything will change LOL

[winter comet]

i think with a lot of parents who aren't purposely transphobic it's just a matter of habits they have to break

[mossy thicket]

Yeah

The only real problem (That I frankly fo not give a flying fuck about) is my sister. She's transphobic

Never liked her in the first place do it's not like I'm losing a loved one

[winter comet]

yeah she has no power over you and if you have the support of people you care for that's all that matters

[mossy thicket]

Who knows maybe she will come around too

Least likely tho

[winter comet]

that's true too, people can definitely change especially when they actually see past the propaganda and they see the real happiness that transition brings
good luck taking these further steps man

[mossy thicket]

Thank you ‼️

Hope your journey goes nicely too

[winter comet]

🤝

[mossy thicket]

It was nice to talk to someone about gender things

Anyway gonna hit the sack,

[elder saffron]

It genuinely makes me happy how accepting this community is of trans people. Idk just I've been through a few discords in the past and there is always someone or a group of people out to cause problems regardless if the server states they're welcoming. Just another reason why I love MG.

[final heart]

MACHINE GIRL DOESNT DO HOMOPHOBIC CLIQES

[left rivet]

Yeah real as a lurker

[winter comet]

i've been around long enough to know that the best way forward is to walk together and not to overpolice your own communities so to speak, there are a ton of communities online with a lot of trans people but aren't as chill because there are bad faith actors
i appreciate the mix of perspectives here

[final heart]

I wish I could head bang with you all while listening to cloud 99

[digital geyser]

oh absolutely. i love my uni trans discord server but sometimes they can get a bit language policey

[final heart]

Language policey sounds shitty

[digital geyser]

likd you word smth slightly wrong and get 60 paragraphs on how you are perpetuating cis ppl, and it often targeted me specifically since i can kinda throw words about without thinking fully about what im writing when i’m not in essay mode

ppl actually noticed how much it targeted me :((

it seems to have calmed down tho recently

[final heart]

I word things wrong all the time which Is why I left the Zelda fan fiction server I was once in

[digital geyser]

i never left but some ppl ik did bc of the toxiciity

but its been generally ok recently

[final heart]

And this a Uni trans server, so, for like your college?

[hallow bronze]

I thought it was for the funny internet cat (joking)

https://tenor.com/view/uni-unico-uniuni-unicouniuni-unicouniuni3-gif-12798344145506295943

[digital geyser]

yeee, university

sorry i’m british lol

[digital geyser]

i dont think the number of trans ppl who appreciate that cat and wiuld be in a discord for them is 0

i know i love that cat

[hallow bronze]

There's definetly a niche for trans uni fans yeah

[digital geyser]

a sentence i should utter on a daily basis

[digital geyser]

i mean they’re a cat on the internet. trans ppl love cats and the internet. and they’re a goober :p

[winter comet]

i hate the internet

alas

despite all my rage i am still just a rat in a cage

[digital geyser]

i love the internet in that it has kept me going for many years. i hate the internet for all of the cesspools it has enabled

[winter comet]

genuinely would love to not have to be online for everything including shit like movie tickets

[tall pawn]

⚠️ Caution: Online ticket scams are common. Always use PayPal Business for protection—this allows you to request a refund if scammed.
More info: #1365896617462599750 message

[winter comet]

thank u carl

sorry evil carl

[digital geyser]

and i think it evens out to i love the internet like i love a friend who sometimes can suck but overall their friendship is worth the bad moments

[digital geyser]

thats fair

for me it makes existing more accessible

phone calls are hard and sometkmes it is hard for me to physically leave my house bc of my fatigue issues

[winter comet]

i remember the internet when it was a door you opened and closed and that was fine but now the door has been taken off the hinges and i cannot put it back

[digital geyser]

i find text based communication easier and less draining while fulfilling my social needs

[digital geyser]

i get u

its nuanced and i think if i was less nerfed by energy issues and the like i’d feel more negatively about how much it is in our lives

and i also thijk it has brought a lot of evil into this world

but also if it wasn’t for the internet i wouldn’t be trans

[winter comet]

when i was a teen i found the internet a lot easier for me to communicate through but at my age i feel like it's way more draining

[digital geyser]

its becoming a little more draining for me now than it was for me as a teen but not by enough to rlly impact me, and i think its more i’ve become more easily drained

these past few years is when my fatigue issues have started up and it corresponds lol

(cant wait to go to the doctor next week and get told its normal and fine lol)

also regardless of these opinions on the internet altho this is rlly interesting /gen, i think looking at cats on the internet is something we can agree is a good thing it allows

i’m not allowed pets in my university house so it allows me to vicariously enjoy cats when i’m not at my parents’ place, which is most of the time

i’m in sleepy yap mode apologies for the ramble, i think i’m gonna sleep

[next harbor]

Essay mode is so relatable though like ffs not everyone is ON all the time

[digital geyser]

yeahh

[sudden zephyr]

I am never on 😔

I just don't bother with it like there's this thing in my head to tell me "say something c'mon just something" but I just stfu and let it happen cuz wtf is me saying anything gonna do

[digital geyser]

like i think my main exception would be "hey that thing you said soudns like a dogwhistle" or smth similarly like this could be actively harmful. if its just like oh ur wording was a bit mid but i get ur point i dont think its an issue

[winter comet]

i think if i know someone is simply ignorant i teach them alternatives but if i know someone is already knowledgeable i just leave it be
ive never really gone high horse about it tho bc its either: someone is saying things in bad faith and wants to waste your time before the argument even starts, someone means well but isn't very educated on the topic, and someone already knows but is using shorthand

cant stand internet leftists whose motivation is to dunk on people and be combative constantly

[digital geyser]

frfr

[digital geyser]

exactly

like if i say "female doctor" i'm not ignorant of the complexities and nuances of using that term, if a cishet dude goes "all these females" i'm suspect

[winter comet]

if i care enough to suggest something to someone its bc i care about them as a person and want them to know better and then do with that what they will bc id want someone to do that for me

[digital geyser]

exactly. and the thing is in these scenarios it was ppl i didnt know that well lol. one of them has literally been ghosting me

[winter comet]

sometimes people egos are too fragile tho and anything is an attack and that's when i just go ok bud

keep that lettuce stuck in ur teeth

[digital geyser]

that is not a phrase ive heard before

what does it mean lol

[digital geyser]

so much needless discourse would be avoided in this scenario

[winter comet]

its like if someone has lettuce stuck in their teeth and you tell them about it and they take it personally

and its like okay if you'd rather walk around like that then sure

[digital geyser]

like a recent tiktok thing where a cis man stiched a trans man talking about transphobia trans men get from being men and pretended the trans man was doing a "not all men" and then everyone got cauhgt up on the trans man using the term misandry and not the fact that the stitcher and a cis woman who also stitched him proved his point by completely erasing his transness to just focus on him beingn a man

(i realise that might not make full sense i hope it does)

[digital geyser]

icic

idk why my brain thought it was smth to do with rabbits lmao

the rabbits are not one for leftist discourse ig

[winter comet]

watership down

[digital geyser]

fr

my brain is going to this stupid damn ai video of rabbits that tricked a good number of ppl

i'm so chronically online holy shit

[winter comet]

but yeah to expand on it its like the person is making that lettuce a reflection of the totality of their personhood and not just something attached to them they can pluck out

[digital geyser]

yeah

[winter comet]

sidenote i fucking hate the rabbit vids where rabbits are sitting on their backs in an unnatural position eating way too much fruit and if anyone who doesnt know much about rabbits sees those they dont realize how bad it is

[digital geyser]

are those ai videos?

[winter comet]

not all of em

[digital geyser]

i'm thinkingn of the trampoline one

[digital geyser]

ngl thats worse

:( <- me @ ppl making animal abuse funny on the internet

[winter comet]

rabbits for some reason are so esoteric to people so mistreatment of them online is extremely widespread
but thats another can of worms

[digital geyser]

ive never owned rabbits so i'm not familiar with said rabbit hole

(that was not intentional wordplay)

i got myself on feeling sad about "chonker" cats today, but i did get to see a wholesome video of a lady who adopted a 30lbs cat and got him from being unable to walk more than a couple of steps to jumping onto things and being generally an active cat againn (he's now like 20lbs, still chunky but so much progress)

so there's some wholesomeness for the chat

[dull raft]

god i fucking hate ppl who think fat animals are cute

[digital geyser]

and i bet u half the time if they saw a fat person they'd be like "ewwww"

but when its an animal that can't control its diet bc its yk an animal its like awww chonker

like some animals like humans bc we're also aimals are gonna naturaly be a bit chunky, my friend's cat is a healthy weight for the cat according to their vet despite being chunkier (but not like HORRRIBLY chunky). but the morbidly obese cats are not ok

i think i saw a stat once that i cant remember the specifics but its like a good proportion of american cats are obese

compared to other countries

[dull raft]

YEAH

my other halfs kitty is a slightly big boy but hes not in any pain at all. he still plays and runs like a normal kitty

but the cats who are the size of a melon or some shyt bro 💔

[digital geyser]

when i was a kid one of our cats got to be chunky and she was put on a diet and became a healthy weight again. and she was nowhere near some of these cats

i think some ppl purely view their pets as playthigns or as monetary tools, like family influencers and their kids

i miss my cat now she’s my family cat so she lives with my parents :((

and my lease doesnt allow pets :((((

but the girl i’ve been seeing has four cats (and a bearded dragon) so like my rizz and polyamoury has won me smth

im yet to meet the pets :(

[dull raft]

:((((

[final heart]

“Hecking chonker”
I’m gonna hecking CHOKE you if you give your cat diabetus

[dull raft]

SEHRNCX

REALL

ill make sure u get to the human equivalent of that poor kittys weight so u can feel the shit they go through daily 🙏

[winter comet]

anyone who unironically says "chonker" log off forever

[dull raft]

RELELDKVKKC

[final heart]

Look I have a cat and she’s like

A little bit fat

She’s not obese like a lot of cats can get

When just fed constantly

Look at her

[dull raft]

kittyyy :33

that's about the same size my other halfs kitty is

[digital geyser]

cat!!!

[candid ore]

my cat is very heavy but hes just incredibly large... also a lil fat but mostly just of a large physique

hes like 10 lb but he plays and eats the same as the rest of our cats (5-6 lb) so it's definitely just how he be

[winter comet]

primordial pouch

some cats are just heavyset
as long as the vets don't see an issue then there is none
a lot of the time it's muscle and skin making them look fat too

[candid ore]

it swings when he runs 😔

[digital geyser]

aldo some cats are just large not in a chonky way

i’ve had a few big guys

we have a small dog, bigger than a chihuahua but not that big, and a few of our cats we’ve had were larger in length/general size

he’s about the same size as my current cat who is pretty standard cat sized

n like one of those cats was pretty heavy, but in terms of weight he was a good weight (he had other health issues bc he was an elderly boy)

[tropic zenith]

ya this is most common i have one on right now lmao

they can hold forms in place so they don’t slip out and shit

[final heart]

It’s a cushion to prevent slash damage from hitting any organs

That’s why they attack you if you rub their belly

[digital geyser]

i didnt put two and two together on nthat

but makes sense

[digital geyser]

its so iterestingn how dog and cat behaviour can be so different in that regard

like my dog will roll over for a bellyrub half the time you go to pet him, i'm afaik the only person my cat lets touch her belly and that is not a common occurance. wagging/flicking tails and ears to some extent are also completely different signals

and you can sometimes tell when a cat or a dog was raised by the other species, our dog definitely had some mild cat traits going on when he was little since he grew up with three cats from around 4 months old

can't say the same for the cat, the shelter said she was dog friendly which she is not and while she has gotten less pissy towards him over time she still is not a fan

(tbf he does steal her food if he gets the chance, we keep them separate)

[final heart]

Different evolution chains

[digital geyser]

i wonder at what point in cat dog evolution the desire for bellyrub diverged

did LUCA want bellyrubs...

this is an important question science must answer

i love this graph on the wikipedia for abiogenesis (i said i was going to bed i'm on a rabbit hole now)

ok thats insane

[digital geyser]

i was talkingn about lobster/crab evolution with this person whose currently crashing at mine and ended up with a new gender binary:
so basically crustaceons in the crab/lobster gang, the closer they get evolutionarily to true crabs, the more likely they are to somehow evolve into crabs. so in that gang there's basically those that stick to lobster and those that go for crab
so there are two options: crab or lobster. which are you

i think i'm lobster bc they're fucking sicc

and aint no evolution gonna tell me what i'm gonna do

[grand hearth]

can i be mantis shrimp

[digital geyser]

smh not allowed, you can be one or the other

[grand hearth]

https://tenor.com/view/crying-emoji-gif-21922016

[digital geyser]

(yes)

[grand hearth]

FINE. lobster

[digital geyser]

(shrimp it up)

[grand hearth]

https://tenor.com/view/shrimp-miku-shrimple-shrimp-miku-justan-oval-gif-2537052396925426598

[hallow bronze]

I'll be a rock lobster

[candid ore]

im a crab because they taste better

[winter comet]

DID YOU EAT CRABS? CRAB?
i ate. tooooooo /ref

[elder saffron]

Mantis shrimps are so badass tho

[mossy thicket]

I lobe lobster

[next harbor]

lobster lobes you :)

[elder saffron]

Had my appointment with my new endo, and omg is she the best

Like, she actually knows what shes doing among other things I was seriously surprised

I brought up how my previous endo acted and even she was taken aback

[jagged quiver]

https://tenor.com/view/pinkpantheress-even-she-was-weirded-tf-out-weirded-out-vamportega-gif-16897126701864291813

[elder saffron]

Fr

[dull raft]

WHY IS HE RED IN SHINIGAMI EYES DID I MISS SOMETHING

IDK HIM VERY WELL BUT I DIDNT THINK HE WAS TRANSPHOBIC ☹️

[candid ore]

i wish shinigami eyes had a way to figure out why someone is marked that way

[feral wind]

whats shinigami eyes?

[candid ore]

seems from searching it's a false marking

[candid ore]

browser extention that marks anti-trans links red and pro-trans links green

[feral wind]

ah ok

[candid ore]

so like jk rowling's wikipedia page for example is red

[feral wind]

yea

[winter comet]

didn't mutahar misgender christine weston chandler like repeatedly in tweets when she went to jail
genuine question

[dull raft]

that's awful if its true what the fweak man

[candid ore]

tbh probably because like everyone does

[winter comet]

watching a video and he is only using they/them pronouns or avoiding pronouns
i never had a freakish obsession w cwc so i don't know if christine uses multiple pronouns or not but this does smell like transmisogyny to me

[candid ore]

i have an ex friend who is like unhealthjily strangely obsessed with chris chan and you'll never believe it but he is transphobic too

[dull raft]

chris chan is what happens when all the wrong things happen at the right time

[winter comet]

doesn't surprise me, people who fixate on "lolcows" are usually all encompassingly misanthropic

[dull raft]

she just so happens to also be trans

[winter comet]

people let their asses show when it comes to predatory trans people because "they're such a shitty person it doesn't matter if i'm transphobic to them"

[dull raft]

YEAH

[winter comet]

like make no mistake im not defending chris chan on any front it's about the sentiment of misgendering someone just because they're harmful

[dull raft]

meanwhile when theyre talking about hitler for example theyll use the correct pronouns

[winter comet]

i personally think the cwc stuff is why mutahar is in red but i can't find the tweets bc im not on twitter
the video of him avoiding using she is enough for me tho

i personally dont bother using shinigami eyes bc of the fallibility of the flagging system but different stuff works for different people

i think it's a noble effort if nothing else

[candid ore]

negl i really only use it so if i see a name in red in a comment section or something i can look and see if their videos are stupid

i once found a lady who posts about how she detransitioned and stopped being autistic because she started the carnivore diet

[winter comet]

the brainworms she got from only eating meat rewired her neurological makeup 😇

on the other hand i come across detransitioners who aren't transphobic and don't take their issues out on the community they used to belong to

[candid ore]

i think shinigami eyes is mostly useful on tumblr because they have a horrendous terf population

[winter comet]

this is true

i havent been on tumblr in almost 10 years i forgot about how terfy it is

[digital geyser]

i got some very lovely /s comments once on twitter in a debate abt not misgendering bad trans ppl focussed on cwc

there was this fairly long exchange with some person where they slowly over the course of it revealed they did in fact not see trans ppl as the gender they are and only respect pronouns out of respect/kindness which rlly is the crux of this debate

same sorta things been happening with lily tino recently

if i have to hear her fucking name again istg i wish people could normalise blocking ragebaiters!!! but shes got the transphobic crowd hooked

[digital geyser]

and the one i just detailed was the nice one, i got some bad transphobia from another person and then some old ass dude asked cw SA ||who groomed you into being trans|| so that was fun to deal with /s

i usually ghost ppl in internet arguments nowadays. if i feel i need to say smth i will, but if they get pissy i do dip

and most of the time i just cant be bothered lol

and tbh i’m getting better at just going “i know this video is going to have a bad comment section i’m not even going to read it”

anyway shoutout to the block button it makes tiktok so much more usuable

[digital geyser]

also i just find its nicer to just comment nice or informative things. i like complimenting video creators :D

why get into a fight i can’t win when that time can be used to make someone’s day better

[winter comet]

i barely know who lily tino is bc i dont bother logging on to get mad but ive seen even trans women misgender her it's wild

trans grifters who betray their own community for some illusion of security in cishet patriarchy are not new

[dull raft]

from what i know she had inappropriate convos with kids at a disneyland or something

[digital geyser]

idk if it was with kids but defo made innapropriate content there

idk anythign else again ive just seen the transphobia and the response to the trasnphboia

like there was some cis gay guy who fully called her the t slur

[digital geyser]

i feel like part of that might be part of the resurgence of pickme lgbtq+ culture especially in trans circles as of late. a lot of transmed stuff has been popping up it feels. idk how much in trans women spaces but certainly has been happening in trans men

like ur always gonna have blair whites and kalvin garraghs but it does feel like theres more folks like that atm

i'm so glad i'm not 15 anymore

anyway embrace being a lil weirdo with ur gender and fuck those gatekeepers they suck!

(i'm sure pick me nonbinanry people exist too, ik some did exist in the kalvin garragh era, but tif you're ninbinary you are getting to the point where you know there is no way to appeal to conservatives at all. binary folks think they can if they try hard enough to pass. spoiler alert: you can't)

its honestly so sad to me. the majority of the trans community imo is so accepting and a lot of these people have been led to believe that it isn't, i think partly bc of the toxic circle this kinda bs creates where you fear if u step out of those rules you'll be rejected by other trans ppl (especialy for kids who gets sucked into it like i was whenn ni was 14-15). and you end up in a double bind of convincing yourself if you stop hating yourself for not passign and other trans ppl for not trying to pass you will be rejected by both communities, while actively hurtig and damaging your mental health and self perception in ways that can often take years to work through (againn from experience)

(and i'm not excusing ppl who do go into it bc it is a dangerous rabbit hole both in how it leads to bullying and so on and also bc it leads quite easily into other bigoted ideologies. you need to hold yourself accountable if you do perpetuate these ideologies, especially if you're an adult)

[winter comet]

i have absolutely seen pick me nonbinary people

[digital geyser]

oh god what do they even say

[winter comet]

usually ones who medically transition

[digital geyser]

obviously hating on like neos and tboy lesbians and the like

[winter comet]

the same shit binary transmeds say tbh
just with a different end goal

[digital geyser]

like i'm sorry but they aren't gonna pick you

[winter comet]

real
baby they will not love you they cant even use singular they in a sentence deliberately

[digital geyser]

frfr

[winter comet]

i remember the transmed gender cop circles being huuuuge with trans guys on tumblr in like 2013-2016 ish
i quit tumblr in 2016 so i only end it there bc i have no reference beyond that
it just keeps recycling on different platforms

[digital geyser]

i really hope these ppl find other trans ppl who aren't in these ideologies and the discover the important lesson: if its not hurting anyone, someone else's identity is none of your business

(and like the argument is it's hurting our reputation but again a conservative will hate you regardless of if you're a tgirl whose on hormones and talks about being a biological male or a catgender nonbinnary person who will never medically trannsition. they hate us all)

and i'd frankly much rather be freidns with the latter person

[winter comet]

i'm someone who intends on transitioning medically and think that medical transition is extremely important to make as accessible as possible and that people who do not wish to do so should still support those who do (because i do the vice versa and advocate for those who don't want to/can't)
and i have pretty much never been full on transmed
i did have a bit of a gender cop phase at like 17-18ish because i thought microlabels were stupid but i was at a very low point at that time in my life like the correlation between my self hatred and my frustration with the trans community was very very clear

[digital geyser]

it only rlly died down in 2020-21 whenn a bunch of ppl cancelled kalvin garragh, brennan beckwith, his first harrassment victim, made a bunnch of videos about the subject and that rlly killed his channel. but 2017-19 was the peak kalvin era

also around the same time blair white got mainsntream pushback from ppl like djangelo wallace

[digital geyser]

yeah i get you on both points. as i previously mentioned i was a transmed when i was 14-15 bc i had just realised i was trans and was getting invalidated a lot and i felt if i pushed that i was super dysphoric and wanted to be a massive dude and thought all that other stuff was cringe i'd be valid. i didnt rlly attack or harrass anyone, i just internally hated myself and even after i legit just one day had the realisation of "damn i'm beinng a dick" the self hatred and denial about being trans persisted for years

i do want to medically transition but its not my entire life's goal now and i'm ok not passing most days. i get the odd rlly bad day but like as long as the ppl i care about don't misgender me i can deal with some she/hers from randos

(its also bc just waiitng lets me delay coming out to my terfy parents which means i get their money)

(i'm on the waiting list on the nhs for context, like i am actively seekign it)

[winter comet]

i always felt nonbinary people were valid (because to no one's surprise it turns out i am one + autism makes gender just some blurry staticky inconvenience to me) but i would be like "why do you need to call yourself akoiromantic why do i need a wiki page to understand your sexuality bla bla bla"
i was basically like a gender centrist LMAO
both tucutes and truscum were stupid to me
now i dont care be "annoying" about being trans just dont be ignorant about other marginalized identities

[digital geyser]

exactly

[winter comet]

i used to be a pick me ace for sure tho

[digital geyser]

like racism et in the trans community is such a bigger issue

[winter comet]

and now you cannot pay me to give a shit because i am no longer self hating lmao

[digital geyser]

i'm glad i realised i was ace long after my pickme/centrist phase

i'm a big labeller but ace is the one area where i rlly struggle to find one

[winter comet]

i think it was easy for me to be shitty about ace activism and place in the wider lgbt umbrella because i was already queer by way of gender and romantic orientation
but now i'm wiser and i think to understand the plight of the ace community is to have an even more enriched understanding of patriarchal harm

[digital geyser]

i sorta just say somewhere in the mush of grey/demi/whatever

[digital geyser]

fck yeah

[winter comet]

yeah im greyromantic and sexual but i'm married so i dont talk a lot about being onnthe aro spec i just kinda say i'm demi or greyace bc it doesnt really come up in convo a lot

also the ace flag is the best one

so

[digital geyser]

i was also a bit of a pan exclusionist but that was mostly bc a friend was and they were a bit shitty abt me identifyingn as pan (and also as queer bc they were persoally uncomfortable with the label which like cool but it is my label at the time). anyway in the slay now i do id as pan

[digital geyser]

true

i like aro more purely bc i love green

but ace is a good ass flag

[winter comet]

i dont like the demisexual flag either i pretty much just use the ace flag

[digital geyser]

yeah its so mid

i own like one grey ace pin

[winter comet]

i liken it to nonbinary people that prefer the trans flag

[digital geyser]

yeah

[winter comet]

like yeah i have a specific flag but i prefer the broader one

[digital geyser]

or ppl who id as bi or pan bc they prefer the flag of one over the other

i used to think damn wish i wasn't attracted to women bc i loved the gay man flag so much and didnt rlly like achillean

(i very much love being attracted to women 👈 man who got a gf yesterday)

[winter comet]

i enjoy the history of the term bisexual which is why i id with it the flag is sorta eh to me shade wise
but also i dont feel that pan is accurate to me

[digital geyser]

i like using pan partly out of nostalgia as its the first queer label i clicked with and partly bc i do think it fits most (n also i love the colours imo)

[winter comet]

im too goth for most pride flags i fear
the trans flag is objectively cute but i dont like pastels

[digital geyser]

for me personally being bi (again this is entirely just for myself, i am not saying it is an exclusionary label bc its not) was the label i used when i was at my most exclusioary and toxic. so to me if i use it its too like attached to all that. pan is a reclamation of me beign cringe and free

i wish i had a green pride flag sfdjdfskljdf

[winter comet]

the only flag i explicitly wear is the ace flag and its not even my most centered identity

[digital geyser]

fair

i think i generally go for nonbinarty the most if i'm addign a pin. it goes the most with my fashion i think (which is like black with pops of colour most of the time)

but agai my mainn colour is green

so

doesnt go that well

damn why couldn't i be agender /j

(sometimes i am agender a bit bc of my genderfluidity bullshit)

[winter comet]

my ye old pronouns page has t4t flag on it

[digital geyser]

ive never seen that 👀

mine has an alternate transmasc flag bc i dotn rlly like the most popular ones

this version

its so nice

[winter comet]

https://en.pronouns.page/@halfdeadhare

my husband has a couple cool custom flags on his

i once jokingly asked him to make a count chocula vampiregender flag

and he did

[hallow bronze]

achillean? more like argentinian

[digital geyser]

i canot fidn mine

not sure if i deleted or renamed it

[hallow bronze]

🇦🇷🇦🇷🇦🇷🇦🇷

[winter comet]

TRUE

[digital geyser]

i figured out what email i used lets gooo

ah i forgor it has my real name on it but

i'd say this is pretty accurate

you can tell this has come from smth

if you use gender neutral girl for me i will explode you with my mind

[dull raft]

yoo i just made one earlier

[mossy thicket]

Oh my god I remember making one a really long time ago. I wonder what it looks like 😭

Oh it's surprisingly empty, I used to get obsessed over labels

I should update ut

[digital geyser]

i updated mine last year bc 16 year old me decided i needed every noun and adjective someone could us for me

lkke if its not smth someone will realistically use in common conversation it doesn’t need to be there

(so like mine has queen for example bc it makes me uncomfortable and that can come up in casual convo, someone got pissy on a discord seever once when i told them not to use it for me)

or again girl in both gendered and gender neutral bc thats a thing ppl say if they use the latter for a trans guy that “oh i use it for everyone” well can u not for me

(and ive seen vice versa for tgirls who don’t like dude or bro, i try to ask transfems i know if they are ok with those)

like obviously if someone or i use it accidentalyl its like ok cool apologise and move on but i do think it shows respect for a person to consider their boundaries

(i realise i’m a massive yapper sorry)

also on topic of shitty nouns, does anyone else find it harder/more dysphoric to be called the adult version of your assigned gender at birth than kid? like if someone calls me a woman its worse, i think bc i got used to being a girl bc i went to all girls schools and the like

and bc even tho again gender meutral girl makes me dysphoric it does still loke kinda exist

[west anchor]

Nah there was a thing a while ago

[final heart]

Shinigami eyes?

Oh

[dull raft]

YEAH

[final heart]

There should be better words to represent people

[grand hearth]

recently he got outed as a fraud so maybe people voted him transphobic because they were (understandably) mad

though with the CWC thing it makes sense that he's red

[digital geyser]

he what now

[grand hearth]

yeah he kept claiming he's "an engineer" when he never even got certification past a 2 year degree

and his response to getting called out about is boils down to "sorry you feel offended about it"

[digital geyser]

icic

[grand hearth]

and it's especially a problem in Canada because calling yourself An Engineer holds a lot more gravity than it might in US culture
we're used to people throwing the word engineer around but in Canada is pretty much on the same level of calling yourself a doctor

[final heart]

Wait he’s involved with Chris Chan?

[grand hearth]

no it was just the early discussion of how he would keep misgendering her in a video or something like that

[final heart]

Oh

Yeah that was a whole argument I had with some friends about that cause she really went for being trans initially because she was into lesbians

But we have to respect the pronouns in general because it shouldn’t be morally correlated

[grand hearth]

well honestly, in things she's said and early writings before she came out it read to me as very real gender dysphoria

I think it's pretty shitty that some people seem to think it's ok to be transphobic to her because she herself is a shitty person

[digital geyser]

yeah a bunch of ppl are convinced she openly said she was only being trans for some nefarious reason i cant remmeber what

i think smth to do with lesbianism but i might be wrong

[grand hearth]

it perpetuates fearmongering about trans women imo

[digital geyser]

yeah

same with lily tino and all the conspiracies abt her faking being trans

(and here id your daily reminder trans ppl can be bad ppl without it somehow making them cis)

if it worked thqt you change gender if you suck as a person there would be so many more trans ppl

[final heart]

Shitty people in the community tarnish its reputation.
Regardless we should respect others as much as possible

[digital geyser]

shitty trans ppl are gonna exist as long as trans ppl exist bc all people have the capacity to be shitty. its more that the shitty folks are hypervisible because for those that hate us they prove their bigotry right

[final heart]

This is very true

The loud minority of those who are bad make everyone else been seen as similar to them

It sucks

[elder saffron]

He also was shitting on DIY HRT as a whole. Not understanding anything about it or why people would even go that route too

(in regards to Muta)

[winter comet]

with diy hrt its usually because people are in an ultimatum caused by an inaccessible society
either get hurt from dysphoria or (possibly) get hurt from hormones
if you know literally anything about the trans struggle it's obvious which many would choose

but when you're cis and either in community with no trans people on the regular or with particularly privileged trans people, that apparently goes in one ear and out the other

[elder saffron]

Yup!

I believe it was the video about keffles? where he said all that, but yeah you can tell he didnt talk to anyone that was trans while making that video

[winter comet]

thinking about blaire white moving back to california from texas
she claims its because she wants to run for office in california and turn it more red essentially
and as a trans person who is from texas i can't help but wonder if it's because even as a conventionally attractive, feminine white conservative woman she will be forced to change her gender markers to m and be treated like shit

like when you renew that license it's over

besides clerical things i'd argue on whole even if you live in austin (which is quite liberal for texas. Interesting) there are more chances for people to harass and attack you if they clock you

cis women are being "clocked" now too so apparently the goalpost has moved yet again and being as conservative as possible isn't letting you get a grip on it

[elder saffron]

Off topic, but I recently have made the decision to work towards getting a breast augmentation done. My big thing is having the money to make it happen, but I think my insurance can over most of it, but if so it seems like Im gonna need a lot of paper work just so they will. If not I hopefully can fund it through crowdfunding or finding a good credit card lol

[winter comet]

get those boobs 🆙 sister

[elder saffron]

I'll finally get to be the big tittie goth gf lmao

But in all seriousness I hope I can navigate all this smoothly

[elder saffron]

Soooo found out my insurance will cover most of the cost, but I have to get a letter of support from a therapist. My insurance is gonna look into seeing if a local place will accept my insurance under gender affirming care cause I guess some surgeons will not bill insurance like that. But over all for now its a waiting game until I hear back from my insurance

[elder saffron]

If anyone here happens to have any advice or anything I'm all ears btw

[winter comet]

good luck i hope you can get everything sorted easily

[carmine cobalt]

good luck! navigating insurance is such a pain

just started T yippeeee

[winter comet]

hell yeah
i now have insurance so i hope i get on it soon too
ive been waiting 11 years

[digital geyser]

congrats!!!

i’m waiitng to get it on the nhs, can see myself waiting a while. if i get financially independent from my parents in that time i’ll prolly go private

honestly if i got a job when i graduate i could probably do that but i want to do a masters

[grand hearth]

I hate getting brain farts for
Things I otherwise could do in my sleep I wasted a perfectly good needle just now 🤧

[elder saffron]

God its the worst feeling ever

[pulsar mortar]

hey trans people are banned from the military yeah? my partner (who is trans) has been discussing wanting to join the the military mainly for the benefits for college, housing, money, etc (which who knows if those are even still existent considering who’s currently president) but i was questioning if it would even be worth it for him

i brought up the fact that joining the military for the benefits doesn’t seem worth it if he has to hide his identity in the process

but yeah just wanted to know

[jagged quiver]

im a military dependent and and yes, being in the military does still get you college and housing benefits, military will house you and cover a certain # of months of college thru something called the Post-911 G.I. bill

it wldnt make sense for trump to touch military benefits since they're one of the biggest things feeding americas military machine lol

so its probably a stable choice financially

i cant speak on whether the potential psychological drawbacks would be worth it tho bc idk his situation

i will say now is a VERY bad time to join the military given current global political tensions caused by That Guy™ and That Country™

Id highly recommend your partner to aim for something like IT or a similar position that wouldn't see combat

thats what my brother did

@pulsar mortar

[pulsar mortar]

thank you so much!!! ill keep this all in mind :))

[misty harness]

lol yeah don't join the military unless it's absolutely last fucking choice

[jagged quiver]

its not even an option for me personally bc of my autism diagnosis let alone me being trans :P

they straight up would turn me away

at least i think, i remember they were rlly onto my brother for that shit bc he used to have a diagnosis but ig shows little enough symptoms that they j like consider him cured? even tho that straight up isnt a thing

[golden plover]

I also reacted on that.

You can't "cure" autism.

That's like trying to cure someone not being caucasian or straight (not perfect analogy I know)

[digital geyser]

whats more likely is your brother has just learned to mask well enough, which ironically is both a listed autism trait in the dsm and very unhealthy

or he was misdiagnosed

[golden plover]

I don't believe my military (Sweden's) does horrible things, but I'm not joining still.

I'm not signing up to die if a politician decides to start beef with someone.

.

Neither could I kill people.

As an atheist I find killing anyone for any reason extremely cruel.

Because I don't believe in a afterlife, you are dooming people to non-existence.

[golden plover]

So you have to properly be the worst person ever many times with no remorse or willingness to change for me to consider that valid.

[digital geyser]

the military prays on young ppl to turn them into propagandised weapons of the state by promising them a way out of poverty, an issue many countries could fix if they stopped funding the military so hard

[bronze ocean]

they prey on people like that because they can be quite naive and will work extra hard when given the right motivation and will usually be capable of jobs that require high specialization

undiagnosed adhd kids will become boot boys and "low support" autistic kids will design the next generation of drone targetting systems :')

[winter comet]

in the usa military recruitment is extremely insidious and predatory and they harvest poor kids with little academic prospects right out of high school (they genuinely set up tables and shit and we have JROTC in schools, junior reserve officer training corps)
one of my friends that lived in kentucky got harassed by recruitment texts for a long time while they were living in poverty

my cousin joined the military because she lived in louisiana and the TWO full time jobs between her husband and her weren't cutting it and they wanted to plan for a family and the military moved her and her husband to a place they face more racism as an interracial couple

my dad was a teen dad and had basically nowhere else he would have a career

all this to say the military gave them "benefits" but only after they were backed into a corner financially pretty much
my dad got medically discharged after a mental breakdown

the sexual harassment and general mistreatment in the military is rampant, the privileged protect their own
their training tactics and culture of strict routine are similar to what high control religious groups/cults use

it will never be worth it to try and improve your life financially to become part of the imperial regime of our failing country and have your humanity stifled

also as a former military kid that was quite literally born from the sheer fact that the us military is still sticking their grubby fingers into south korea, i hate the military
these are my two cents

[misty harness]

they totally let you in the military with an autism diagnosis if the recruiter thinks you're "normal" these days. trans? under trump not anymore

[misty harness]

Sweden's modern military has participated in way fewer conflicts (usually as part of un peacekeeping lik in bosnia and several african conflicts) but they joined NATO in the libyan war to overthrow Gaddafi, the us's war in afghanistan, and some others. so they def have participated in some awful shit, even if its way less than a lot of its allies

[jagged quiver]

i think it depends on the recruitment agency, my brother had to show a shit ton of proof that he no longer had the autism diagnosis lol

[winter comet]

they retconned his autism

[misty harness]

yeah probably, a coworker of mine was talking about his son who wanted to enter the navy despite having an autism diagnosis and the recruiter was like "oh whatever we dont care as long as you can do the job"

[jagged quiver]

deadass

[pulsar mortar]

my partner is in jrotc

[dull raft]

💔

[dull raft]

LMFAO???

"so what do u guys do"
"ur a wee bit annoying dont join pls"

LMFAOO

[pulsar mortar]

luckily so far he’s said it’s been good

but i brought up whether he plans to enlist after high school and it seems he’s changed his mind (he said that it’s more like a last resort choice and that it’s unlikely they would let him in)

[dull raft]

mine does (to the uniform thing)

[pulsar mortar]

plus he is planning to try and fulfill a career that pays well so

im not sure exactly what you mean, but he said they got uniforms today though

true!!

you’re real for that…

i actuallt didnr know that was a sticker too

[digital geyser]

we did have some military ppl at our careers fairs too. i went back to my high school last spring to promo englit degrees/the arts during one since i remmeber feeling so sad we had no rep and they were there

its just icky to me idk

idk how strong iti s in the uk compared to america but i do get adverts to join the military every so often, i used to get them a lot on spotify tbh before i got premium

(i had my spotify age set to being born in 2000 for a while so i was getting those and get into teaching adverts quite a bit)

actually pretty sure ive seen them before films at the cinema before which is a bit concerning considering ive never seen a film rated 18+ in the cinema

(as in i’ve never been to see one, its not a curse actually to rate smth 18 here)

[bronze ocean]

the high school to military pipeline is real

[chrome snow]

Every single commentary slop tuber should be marked red.

[dull raft]

fair enough tbh

[grand hearth]

Oh ya I added that one a couple years ago. It’s not particularly popular tho

Maybe I’ll redo it one of these days

[west anchor]

Slop live would never be transphobic

https://tenor.com/view/fall-guys-gamer-ps4-game-time-victory-gif-18429480

https://tenor.com/view/pyrocynical-dolan-darkest-slop-live-dolan-dark-pyrolive-gif-18236606778212377371

[elder saffron]

Anyone have some good make up alternatives to ELF? I don't wanna use any of their products anymore given that they wanna give Matt Rife a platform

Mainly just need a good eyeliner, sticky primer, and concealer alternative

[winter comet]

man i haven't truly worn makeup besides eye stuff in a hot minute (since i was 14) so i can't help with the complexion products i remember most drugstore eyeliners being perfectly fine tho, depends on what kind you use but most liquids are ok, some non waterproof pencils will just disappear immediately without eye primer

nyx might have some equivalents even tho they're not that cheap anymore but neither is elf

[elder saffron]

I used to use NYX for primer, but I've honestly been thinking of switching back to them for everything, but yeah their prices are up there 😬

[winter comet]

colourpop is also kind around the same price range-quality ratio but they're mostly online

i hate ordering makeup online but i like stuff like rituel de fille or i can't find a single matte black shadow in person without buying a whole palette or even a duo

[timid grail]

i like nyx and colourpop personally

colourpop palettes are relatively inexpensive and have good pigment imo

[winter comet]

yeah ive had some good luck w colourpop, they have a lot of different colors in singles too

i dont know anything about their complexion makeup but their eye makeup is definitely serviceable
i had good results w their shadow primer but ive also seen people hate it

as someone with hooded oily lids the eye primer has saved my life

[elder saffron]

I shall check out some of Colourpops stuff then

[smoky kelp]

sorry this is an OLD ass message but adelaide????? teenager???? cool person spotted?????

[smoky kelp]

mutahar is a whole bag of worms not fond of the dude

[dull raft]

oh damn

[smoky kelp]

THIIIIIS!! australian cadet recruitment is already pretty predatory bro i can not imagine what another 1.3trillion dollars of military budget and a culture thats heavily engaged in manifest destiny type conservatism would be like it sounds like a nightmare

do you wanna join the army 😇 you should totally join the army 😇 you definitely wanna join the army 😇

this is on point

then they make black metal and or kill somebody

and then die.

strange strange stuff

[strong heath]

hello??? yes?? 😭

[jagged quiver]

bruh male pattern baldness is truly like a horrifying concept

i CONSTANTLY check my hairline and am anxious about potentially j developing mpb one day bc like i cant rlly get hrt rn my hair is all i got in terms of gender presentation 😭 if the mpb demon comes for me i am FUCKED and that thought lowkey keeps me up at night

sigh

[winter comet]

if it hasnt started for you yet there is still time

[ripe burrow]

🙏 if you are afraid you can get minoxidil for hair growth, people say it works great for hair regrowth, and i’ll manifest you to have the most luscious and thick head of hair

[winter comet]

iirc it can reverse early stages of mpb as well in case you have to wait to get on it

one of my tgirl friends is on minoxidil after her hair was thinning and maybe a year or half a year later she has a head full of curls

for further context she's not yet on E

[ripe burrow]

booyaaahhhh

[ripe burrow]

guhhh chat i lowkey hate the awkward phase in my cut 💔💔💔 do i thug it out and let my hair grow out peacefully or do i pull up to the barbers

[dull raft]

the barbers mighttt be able to do something anout it

if ur that bothered by it (/nm(

[ripe burrow]

its just that my gender has been put into a blender recently and nobody can tell if im a guy or a girl even if i try to present myself more masc, its not a massive bother but its been making me feel like

[molten kite]

Realizing I was going bald was really the tipping point for me in figuring out I was trans

[jagged quiver]

i dont think have terribly bad genetics with mpb like my dads hair was rlly good and so was my grandfathers

but like what if there's an evil bald at 21 gene lurking somewhere in my dna like

scary stuff bro.

[jagged quiver]

ok ive been up like all night stressing over this bc i seriously cannot tell whether im starting to bald or if im tweaking or smth goddamn

like i think my hairline is sorta starting to recede on the left but at the same time im also not totally sure? it def looks and feels like theres slightly less volume but like i cant fully be sure aghhh

i might pick up that medicine danny mentioned just in case lol im not trying to take ANY chances w my hair

if i lose my hair that is my mental health straight up!!

most of my femininity comes from my hair highkey!

and estrogen isnt guaranteed to reverse it

[inland schooner]

my cousin works in engineering in military and she said that theyre struggling ALOT to get people to join the military these days

i think theres this horrible thing that is job searching fresh out of highschool if you dont want to do a trade or go to university or work hospitality your only other choice is military and i know alot of people who think like that its really sad

[next harbor]

Is this still the case? It seems that several new sources want me to believe that there's been a "recent patriotic surge" of enlistment but I can smell bullshit when I see it. If this were the case, it could also be a reflection of how desperate people are right now. I have a friend who's lost a limb from their time spent stepping on a mine so they wouldn't go homeless and I'm just sorta stunned the mainstream doesn't see slavery here

[ripe burrow]

methinks you should have some rest, the more you worry the more things may seem off when thats not the case whatsoever!!! try to distract yourself from these thoughts cuz your mind can play some serious tricks when youre locked in and micro analysing yourself!!! take care!!

[jagged quiver]

ur right... 😓 i do have a tendency to freak myself out

[golden plover]

Sis peaked at my screen looking at this channel and exclaimed "Transformers!"

[jagged quiver]

LOLL

https://tenor.com/view/transformers-gif-8392860725193183314

us:

[next harbor]

nothing more trans than the fascimile of life gathered in intertwined, screeching metal

[misty harness]

gundam >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>

[elder saffron]

I fucking love Gundam lol

[misty harness]

#1043300368240623696 join us

[bronze ocean]

PATLABOR 🗣️🔥🔥

[misty harness]

didnt realize you fuck with cops like that 😥

[bronze ocean]

crazy coming from a gundam fan

[misty harness]

lmao

hey now amuro didnt choose to become a soldier, he was forced into it (sorta

wing and 00's protagonists are all terrorists, IBO's are a bunch of child soldiers who killed their slavemasters, gwitch features a bunch of high school lesbians

its not all bootlicking

||i say as a ghost in the shell fan||

[bronze ocean]

gits is fine cause its uhhhhhhhhhh uhh

cool lights

[elder saffron]

My transition goals is to look half as good as Major

Actually used to have my hair sorta cut like hers my first year being out

[balmy pond]

I have a friend who recently had hers cut like major lol

[winter comet]

ive been in the goth subculture since my early teens and for most of that time i could not be assed to dress notably gothic, i mostly wear really practical clothes in all black and add some accessories or a jacket that might look more deliberately gothic
but now that im a little older and actually go places i kind of want to dress a little more goth and it vexes me to no end that masc "goth" clothes honestly kinda suck in comparison to feminine selections

now, hear me out, ive been around long enough to know the beauty of goth fashion is that you can diy things and use any black garment in a goth outfit

but sometimes i wanna treat myself
and a lot of masc goth styles are just like. metalhead lite, over the top victoriana cosplay, or just overall not as well designed
and i personally do not feel comfortable wearing dresses and slim fit things with low necklines just because i find those things more fashionable but shout out to transmascs who do

im also trying to figure out what silhouettes i want and what overall Look i like bc for home decor i do really like victorian gothic but again a lot of the selections for clothes look costumey for mascs
i don't really believe in categorizing aesthetics super pedantically either

tldr i'm just trying to figure out my lens of fashion where it doesn't make me uncomfy and dysphoric but it's also not boring

[dull raft]

shitting myself so hard over the fact that people headcanon ralsei as transmasc and susie as transfem "for the vibes" (its sexism disguised as diversity)

[winter comet]

transmascs are pushable into lockers /j

[elder saffron]

Id have to agree that when it comes to Gothic fashion men do get the short end of the stick. I remember a few years ago a friend of mine bring this exact same thing up with me. Really I feel like your options are: look like Robert Smith, or Voltaire. Goth Dad from Vision Video is also an option lol

[winter comet]

honestly i would love to evolve into a voltaire like figure when i hit my 30s

robert smith when i get even older lol

i love jfashion's take on goth including for mascs but it's pricey to get it to the states (tariffs and postal service suspension notwithstanding) + not always sized + hard to emulate that look when a lot of those garments are super specifically cut
time to learn to sew even tho fabric is also expensive as hell in this economy and will prob get worse w tariffs LOL

my husband said his favorite flavor of gothic fashion is definitely voltaire's current look and i agree that he has a really nice take on masculine gothic where i dont feel like it looks like cosplay or over the top (nothing wrong w that just not my taste)

and back to jfashion, tbh if i didn't feel like it'd get me confused for an underage girl even more than i already do i'd love to do some toned down ouji fashion, but i think elegant gothic aristocrat is my final form

now that i think about it i think i can kind of swing an EGA look using pieces not sent over from japan

this blabbing just makes me realize i should just open pinterest again (dodging AI as i always do) and make a board. luckily my recs barely dredge up AI bc the pics i pin are so old

[digital geyser]

honestly a lot of men’s fashion sucks. you kinda have to dress at least a little fem if you don’t want to look like shit. esp bc some cis men will gender anything as feminine that isn’t a grey shirt and jeans

[winter comet]

real

it pisses me off that a lot of fashion revolves around creative ways to show off the titties bc its correct but cis men are cowards

also im a coward bc i dont have the correct shape of titty but i have an excuse /j

[magic verge]

i usually buy all my jfashion secondhand, lacemarket is mostly lolita but if you're if you're lucky you can find secondhand ouji, i've seen some pieces on there

as well as more general EGA type garments

[candid ore]

truly noelle is transfem and berdly is transmasc

[dull raft]

the only real answer

[winter comet]

this is true, there is a really robust secondhand market for jfashion i always forget about
i used to be so deep in the egl sauce as a kid it was my special interest but to this day i haven't made many actual strides in wearing it bc sizing

being tallish means everything is mini

[left rivet]

I dont understand, why? /gen

[dull raft]

because usually when someone says "for the vibes" its because they dont have an actual reason to give, they just feel like the character should be trans. its really harmful because it pushes the ideas that cis men cant be gentle, or that cis women cant be strong

its a huge issue in the omori community, too (at least it WAS in 2022)

[left rivet]

Ohh i see, so like depending on the context?

[dull raft]

people kept saying basil WAS canonically transmasc simply based on the fact that he was emotional

[dull raft]

yeah!

[left rivet]

Ok ty

I did see a lot of headcanons of basil being trans but i never thoight of it in that way

[dull raft]

yeahh 💔💔

[winter comet]

your transmasc headcanons are based off of soft boi uwu
my transmasc headcanons are based off if the dude is pathetic and despicable in the ways traced upon the clay tablets in days of yore
we are not the same

[left rivet]

If you guys know black sapphire cookie from crk i headcanon him as being transmasc

[winter comet]

also im a transmasc who is not that conventionally emotional and most of the male characters i tend to relate to are similarly emotionally constipated or have trouble reading between the lines socially lol

im sure some transmascs are conversely very emotional and like to headcanon characters as transmasc bc of that but i know there are people who aren't that just enforce implicit biases

[magic verge]

lol yeah sizing is a big thing, i'm not really sure of any ouji/EGA brands off the top of my head that accommodate taller heights but if i do find something i can let you know. i'm very short but bottom heavy so dresses are fine but anything that involves pants or shorts or something is a crapshoot

i mostly wear ryousangata/jirai kei and thankfully i've been able to find sets that don't have that issue but if it's offered in only one size/free sizing that probably means i can't wear it

[winter comet]

free size my behated

[magic verge]

free size to someone else perhaps

to me it is a prison

[winter comet]

real

[golden plover]

So real.

So much "fashion" stuff is designing clothes that are legal to wear but tries to make you look as nude as possible.

As someone with ahem TACTICAL (EXTREME) DEPLOYABLE [breasts] I hate those clothes, because it breaks the goddamn illusion.

I tend to stick with adrogynous or slightly older femme styles.

[digital geyser]

also passing tips are all just

be boring

and i’m like no

(and also i’m pre T with boobs, a green modern mullet, and the biggest fucking birthing hips you’ve ever seen i’ve got no chance)

[golden plover]

I got snapchat to talk with a few friends and look at their stories.

But holy shit the public "stories" section under the private one.

It's all grotesque shit or straight up softcore shit (from all sexes).

Like how are those clothes covering enough for a platform that a lot of KIDS use.

[winter comet]

im not complaining about clothes being showy i just hate that society has quartered it off as solely a feminine thing lmao

i largely think bodies are nonsexual and showy clothes don't inherently communicate sexual intent, i think puritanism is a huge problem our generation is perpetuating
but it does also suck that femininity is conflated w performing sexuality so modest dress is considered boring or unfeminine

[candid ore]

im pre t with fat honkers, an hour glass figure, and mid-back length hair that i refuse to cut idrc about passing anymore

but im close (ish) to t so thats the main reason i dont care

[winter comet]

there are tmascs aplenty for those with the blessed sight

[dull raft]

so just to make sure i wont accidentally fuck my skin up

trans tape is the same thing as medical tape right?

im looking for a more affordable alternative that works the same and is equally as safe

[winter comet]

u gotta make sure it stretches and is fairly broad

but yeah if it's medical grade it should be fine BUT always patch test a small bit on your skin in case you have a reaction to the adhesive

[digital geyser]

ppl also use sports tape

[ripe burrow]

its either skinny jeans and baggy top or baggy jeans with the most basic hoodie you’ve seen, no inbetween

[digital geyser]

and then the like proper formal stuff is just suites

galore

while women’s wear is like dresses with the funkiest shapes and designs

[ripe burrow]

im finna dress like a victorian city boy

i’d also like to complain about the fact that trans mascs gey called twinks all the time whether they like it or not. i think if i had a penny for every time i got called a twink i’d be a millionaire

🤬🤬🤬

[digital geyser]

so true

[digital geyser]

literally this video core

all the hairy trans mlm men stitched like lol no

[ripe burrow]

fuck that person honestly

once im on T then jts all over tor everyone

i want a moustache

[digital geyser]

i would say that but there’s a good chance i’ll go bald instead of being sexy fruity mullet man with all my thick ass hair as well as facial and body hair

[ripe burrow]

bald can still be fruity and sexy, never doubt yourself

[digital geyser]

true i do know an enby who is bald and while i wouldnt call them sexy they do serve

[ripe burrow]

exactly!

[digital geyser]

but its not my kind of vibe

idk its hard to do bald without giving dad

[ripe burrow]

my fear of starting t is that my hair will become curly/ even more wavy because that just runs on the mens side of the family that they all have curly hair

[digital geyser]

prolly biased bc my dad is close to bald and my uncle is bald

[digital geyser]

oh no i would love that

i have wavy hair but its like wavy im that it goes flat with bits sticking up if i brush it while its wet

[ripe burrow]

my hairs like predominantly straight but the ends can curl in and out and it sometimes annoys me chz i can never tame it to be all uniform

i am growing it out tho so maybe ocne its down to my like tummy then it wont be too bad

i currently have an outgrown mullet thing going on and i havent had a haircut since getting my shit buzzed off and i feel blessed that its original thickness has returned hip hip hurray

[winter comet]

"fetishized" people just shart words now

if a trans guy wants to look like an anime character that's not fetishizing that's just having gender envy or aspiration lol
i mean like i do think there needs to be more body positive, body neutral and honest depictions of the effects of T but god forbid a teen boy wants to look like an anime dude for a bit and will grow out of it

[winter comet]

people also love to call teen boys both cis and trans twinks and im like

[ripe burrow]

https://tenor.com/view/anime-guy-chokes-himself-choking-myself-choking-to-death-anime-choke-gif-25057141

[winter comet]

real
im like
is he a ""twink"" or is he just. a child

the word twink should be revoked from everyone for two years and then we see how it goes

also when im on t i want to remove my facial hair and its not bc i want to "look like an anime man and am delusional about what t does" its bc, just like cis men who like to be clean shaved, i do too

i can already grow a mustache but i don't like it

and im gonna get on my soapbox here for a sec but the double standard for tmascs by cis women and mostly other tmascs is really annoying because yes, everyone should be informed about what hrt can change on your body and how it can change your body, i see a lot of younger tmascs thinking they can cherrypick hrt, but there are plenty of cis dudes who like to shave smooth, speak softer and have long hair and wear makeup and aspire to look like a BL character but apparently if an afab guy wants to do it it's a problem and fetishization and frivolous space being taken up in our oh so tiny trans community (/s) 🤨 simply because bioessentialism

its genuinely bioessentialism

we live in a time where lines are blurred or dissolving, categorizing people with easy to apply terms doesn't cut it anymore and truly never had

[candid ore]

it pisses me off ESPECIALLY because my hairy ass boyfriend gets called a twink all the damn time and it's like. are you just calling him that because hes a f slur

or when i get called a twink when i am fat as hell

[magic verge]

i'm on T and still a twink i take DHT blockers at the same time and i'm just predisposed to having that sort of build lol. i get the whole "you can't cherrypick" thing because you can't exactly predict how hrt will affect you but to act like there's only one way to ever transition is ignorant at best

[candid ore]

i just want to be a big fat bear but im predisposed to just looking weird because im 5'

[magic verge]

my transmasc best friend is 5' and rocking the cub look

if he got back on T he'd probably head towards full bear

but yeah i don't get this attitude towards transmascs who want to transition towards an androgynous/fem guy look who gives a shit cis men do it all the damn time

my transition goal is to become a visual kei band member

i'm getting an at-home salon grade laser hair removal device and it's gonna be for my transfem partner AND me. everybody should do whatever they want with their bodies

[winter comet]

something something "real men" rhetoric repackaged by queers who havent really undone their cishetnormative biases something something

[magic verge]

they're lowkey looping back into tucute/truscum type discourse

time is a flat circle

[winter comet]

also sharing a hair removal device. the true t4t experience tbh

[winter comet]

also yeah so true some people lose weight, some people gain, some people grow a fuck ton of hair, others not a ton etc. not EVERYONE turns into a younger version of their dad or into a bear lol

i love a bear tho and i like all the pro-bear positivity ive also been seeing by tmascs
every time a transmasc reaches their bear potential an angel gains wings

[magic verge]

absolutely

joining the war on transmasc bears on the side of the transmasc bears

[winter comet]

people nitpicking how trans people wanna transition meanwhile theres a bunch of people who dgaf and are happy with themselves

for all the stupid infighting and potshots taken at each other its always good to remember the positive things

[magic verge]

if your immediate reaction to the way somebody expresses their gender or describes their transition goals is to put them down or say it's impossible you should get punched in the face as hard as possible by every trans person

i love being an effete gay trans guy and one of my closest friends is a butch trans woman. peace and love on planet earth

[candid ore]

this is also my future in my relationship lol (i would call it t4c but my boyfriend isnt cis or trans hes just Alex)

[elder saffron]

Came across this since the topic of men's goth fashion came up a few days ago

[winter comet]

i already do all these things they do not elevate my soul to joy

[elder saffron]

[winter comet]

i honestly wish i could dress like kazu from devil's candy but more grown up + a little more gothed up bc i don't really think i can do the little lad shorts on the reg lol

i mean his clothes are largely inspired by ouji fashion but with a more diverse silhouette

i need to learn to sew better
sewing is adhd hell tho bc for me it doesnt feel like a sequence of short satisfying tasks so i never get it done

i should probably follow some oujis on ig
i have to tread carefully tho bc online lolitas are insufferable and oujis are usually also in that venn diagram

[cursive python]

Just made an appointment to get my T 💪🏾

[mossy thicket]

I got gender affirmed in the toilets today

Woman who was collecting payments for toilet questioned why I headed into the women's bathroom

Good I'm passing enough to go onto the men's toilets, but still don't have the balls to do it

Pun not intended

[winter comet]

honestly as someone who was able to pass in my teens, the men's bathroom is wild sometimes

[grand hearth]

i honestly avoid using the men's restroom if i can help it
if there's a single stall room I usually use it at school

i just like the areas where I'd more likely be left alone lol

hate that men's restrooms don't have many sit-down stalls

[golden plover]

You're lucky if you don't get the piss troths on the wall.

Any last privacy that urinals offered, revoked.

[hallow bronze]

back in school, assholes used to go around slapping stall doors and shouting "SOMEONE'S SHITTING HERE", so it wasn't great

[winter comet]

gender neutral or single person bathrooms are the goat

i still use the women's bc i don't pass and i may as well
my sister in law also uses the women's and usually she has no issues but some fuckwad at disney accosted her so i told her to go with me next time

and yes both my husband and my sister in law are trans so when i moved in the ratio of trans to cis in this household shifted higher lmao

[mossy thicket]

Men in my country also have this problem of not being fucking hygienic

Men's restrooms are DISGUSTING most of the times

[jagged quiver]

i still use the mens room bc i think im feminine passing enough that someone could see me and not think anything but if i ever have to interact with somebody for whatever reason my voice is so deep id be cooked LOL

also j bathrooms as a trans person being scary in general

[mossy thicket]

I piss and shit at my own house as much as possible

My school had gender neutral bathrooms and I was in bathroom heaven for 3 years

[golden plover]

Oh that's universal

[mossy thicket]

But yeah I'm glad I'm passing enough to head into the men's bathroom

When I start T I'd definitely won't be able to head into the women's bathroom anymore

[golden plover]

That seems to be the standard in a lot of places in Sweden and I love it.

Traveling to a different country I miss how normal gender neutral bathrooms were.

[mossy thicket]

If only we lived in a society where we don't need to divide the bathrooms for whatever reaskn

Everyone should be able to piss and shit together

[next harbor]

Yeah plus like there's a billion more efficient ways of organizing it. Why not by sit or stand

[golden plover]

Convert to circular bathrooms where we got small holes that only show our faces so that we can socially have eye contact.

-# /j

(I got what you meant, I'm just being ridicilous)

[golden plover]

One is a hall of small gender-neutral restrooms (like nicer stalls that also are more private that way, like they're just small rooms).

The other are urinals.

Was that kinda the idea?

[mossy thicket]

There's only two genders!!!!

Urinals and toilets

[next harbor]

Yes!!

[subtle oracle]

Trans gal here bleh

[winter comet]

many such cases

(hi)

[elder saffron]

Who out here transing they gender

[dull raft]

meeee

[winter comet]

i'm transing my mission

[inland schooner]

I use the men's at high school. Floor constantly covered in piss. gross

[mossy thicket]

Transing my gender so hard rn, so much I have to draw about it

[golden plover]

Me, including the blood stains, I got a bit angry :3c

[winter comet]

honestly there's piss on the women's bathroom floor too but with less incidence usually

there's atrocities in every public bathroom but everybody has those days i guess

[winter comet]

https://tenor.com/view/castlevania-soma-cruz-aria-of-sorrow-estrogen-valkyrie-gif-6354014158971498764

there are at least 2 souls soma has dominion over that turn him into a powerful woman

[candid ore]

so im cooked

[winter comet]

how tall are u

i've known cis men who were 5'3, 5'4, even shorter

i've walked past grown cis men who were up to my shoulder

[candid ore]

i'm 5'0 💔

[winter comet]

there are definitely dudes ur height
i feel like height standards can be fairly ethnocentric

[candid ore]

true but i am very white and white dudes are typically taller especially in america

[winter comet]

patrick stump is a short king

i know plenty of short white cis guys

[candid ore]

true yeah

im only super insecure about my height because i plan to be a high school teacher and i hate the idea of having to deal with that 💔

[grand hearth]

depending on the website this is probably all based on self-reported data

[candid ore]

it was based off average heights of countries

i think so at least

i would assume so because it had a bunch of stuff with average heights

[grand hearth]

idk determining height or general features of a population can be hard to make accurate esp if it's self reported by questionnaire

in any case like. own it
you don't need to be tall to be masculine
i think culture can get too caught up in how tall men are

[left rivet]

Im thinking of telling my teachers this year to use my chosen name, does anyone here have suggestions on how to tell them?

Also im not sure if its worth the risk though since i dont want my parents to know

But im really considering trying

Since i have friends who are also out at school but specifically dont let their parents know

[candid ore]

tbh just email them and say "hey can you call me [preferred name] instead of [deadname] and use [preferred pronouns] and also dont do it with my parents" with whatever grandeurs you wish

[left rivet]

Ok i might just copy what you said lol

Ty

[jagged quiver]

imn literally j say what u j told us

tell them youd rather them refer to you by your chosen name but refer to you as your deadname around your parents

i had something like that in highschool

[left rivet]

Ahh ok

Just need to work up the courage

[jagged quiver]

gl!! :)

[elder saffron]

If youre in the states I would make sure that your state doesnt have some bullshit laws forcing teachers to out students to their parents.

[left rivet]

Yeah dw i just checked my state doesnt have that law but thanks for reminding

[elder saffron]

wishing you the best of luck

[elder saffron]

https://tenor.com/view/comically-large-spoon-estrogen-trans-spoon-king-bach-gif-17910832

[fervent grove]

Everyday I get closer to going full baller and DIYing

[jagged quiver]

real shit

doing it thru the medical system is a pain in the ass and next to impossible for me rn

whats the worst that can even happen

https://tenor.com/view/clueless-gif-24395495

[fervent grove]

When I get my money right we diving in to the T pool yo

[runic fable]

I know someone who’s DIYing with amazon estrogen while living with their transphobic parents

[fervent grove]

I would say baller but genuinely concerned

[runic fable]

I don’t even like the gal but it sounds scary as hell

[fervent grove]

I personally wouldn’t get Amazon E, there’s a lot safer, tested ways of getting it tbh

[runic fable]

Idk I don’t think medically transitioning has to be the end all be all for being trans

Maybe that’s copium from living in a state where you can’t get medical transition stuff until you’re 18

[winter comet]

i mean often times transition is a matter of life vs survival for people, not all dysphoria is solely social
that being said there are currently safer ways to transition even diy
but people can turn to very unsafe measures due to further crackdowns or unsupportive family
it's a symptom of a sick society for sure

[elder saffron]

A lot of those "estrogen" pills on Amazon are well known scams

[winter comet]

yep

not really related to this btw
i vaguely remember on tumblr groups of transmed dudes trying to diy transition by avoiding soy

[elder saffron]

Lmao I remember a girl I used to work with telling me that I can drink a bunch of soy products to develop breast

Like I'm sure their heart was in the right place but that's not how this works

[winter comet]

if we could all transition by simply eating i would be on too much girl juice with all the soy products i consume as an asian lmao

[elder saffron]

It just goes to show how under educated cis folx are when it comes to this stuff

Like those alpha males that freak out over touching receipts lmao

[winter comet]

yeah fr
and transmeds who subscribe too much to cisnormative "biology"

[elder saffron]

Transmeds legit piss me off lol

"omg your dysphoria has to be as bad if not worse than mine or else you're not really trans"

[winter comet]

see actually gender and sex is like a bad drawing tutorial where the women are built like pom bottles and men are all built like refrigerators /s

and male and female brains are so fundamentally different it's like we're all a different species 😇

[elder saffron]

I mean shit I am a bunny girl so maybe they're on to something

[winter comet]

the parallels between bioessentialism with gemder and sex and scientific racist rhetoric is basically one line

[winter comet]

dysphoria is a very easy to categorize linear sliding scale ofc

with objective metrics

[golden plover]

I'm so making something in GIMP tomorow.

[left rivet]

Does anyone else get/felt nervous being called your chosen name cause like my friends have been calling me marin for a year, its been fine, but random people at school calling me marin now makes me feel so nervous suddenly

With my friends i feel cool as heck but with strangers explaining i have pronouns makes me feel like such a loser

Im glad im almost done with hs though cause it feels like alot explaining to people whove known me for 11 years this typa stuff

Feels way easier to attempt to make a new first impression than fix whatever impression someone had of you before

[left rivet]

Cause with my friends i feel fine but with random people knowing that im trans suddenly makes me way more aware of how high pitched i sound

[candid ore]

going to restaurants and giving them my name is so nerve wracking so i get it

like i do Not think people are taking the 5'0 busty teenager seriously when he says his name is robert 😔

[left rivet]

Yeahh

Hearing the same mindset from a different person makes me suddenly think no youre definitely much more cool than you think, like half my friends are trans so when i see other trans people all i think is “wow…. So epic”

It feels different when with a lot of other cis people and you feel like you have to be held up to their standards of gender too

[digital geyser]

as a pre everything trans man i have a weird contradiction that i feel uncomfortable in majority cis male spaces. i'm not sure what it is but i think its partly that bc i dont pass at all and have a high voice, i'm going to be perceived as a woman regardless of what i say. this has all come up bc i'm thinking of joining my university's gamer society next year bc i want to find ppl to play splatoon with and i feel anxious and bad that i dont wanna be in a space with ppl that share my gender. it feels like i neither can be in spaces that reflect how i'm perceived bc then i'm a man in a women's space but nor can i be in spaces that reflect my identity like a majortiy cis male space like a university video game soc. this is probably just anxiety but also what are other folk's experiences with this? particularly with being in very cis male dominated spaces if u appear as a pre everything tboy (and just to a/n this is not an amab/afab thing bc if the soc was a lot more trans than it at least appears to be i'd feel a lot more safe. i feel safest among other trans ppl and would love a gamer group that is just trans folks)

the binary is not afab amab its cis and trans to me lol

[runic fable]

hey guys

i'm trans

Most likely

[elder saffron]

https://tenor.com/view/arthur-morgan-gif-6405671923753155182

[runic fable]

I may not be but like

I’m preeeetty sure i am

[winter comet]

fuck around find out

[runic fable]

Ok

[golden plover]

Schrödinger's trans

[elder saffron]

God I wish I was trans I'm just injecting estrogen for the lols

https://tenor.com/view/ironmouse-smug-face-vtuber-vshojo-ironmouse-witch-gif-6635828045590164917

[digital geyser]

becoming a man for the bit

[next harbor]

Growing a proper beard just to make cis men feel bad (not bc I dislike them, they r just the target population for this silly joke)

[candid ore]

im going to grow a full beard to make cis men feel bad because i Do dislike them

[digital geyser]

i’m going to grow a full beard not to make cis men feel bad about their appearances but to make them down bad for me

[winter comet]

transitioning so i can get with gay men and LARP yaoi irl, obviously

[digital geyser]

exactly

actually

transitioning to date cute trans ppl under the guise of being t4t

[winter comet]

the funny thing about accusations of mlm trans guys being yaoi fetishists is that i don't even like men despite being bisexual and married to one
like not that liking men makes that stereotype true but i am a mild man hater

i also am a reverse uno because everyone who is transphobic is so obsessed with the idea that trans people only date, have sex with, and marry or settle down with cis people

[winter comet]

it is funny tho that my husband and i are a straight couple on paper because i haven't transitioned via bureaucracy yet

he had before the usa decided to try and codify its intense trans hatred into law

[magic verge]

felt this in my soul

i'm primarily attracted to men/consider myself gay but i have zero patience for men if they're going to be fools

[digital geyser]

like i have a deep love for the idea of dating a man, but ive never rlly vibed with cis men on dating apps compared to trans ppl, often trans women and enbies

(and cis women don’t seem to swipe on me often)

[winter comet]

real
and by men i mean all men
no one is meaner to trans men than me /j

[magic verge]

true and real

[runic fable]

Reading this conversation as someone who has no wish to date men:

https://tenor.com/view/morgan-freeman-true-morgan-freeman-true-nodding-gif-13973817878387504960

[winter comet]

all my homies hate men tbh

[runic fable]

I’m pretty feminist

[digital geyser]

[inland schooner]

I did this to start at 14. It was infinitely easier than going through doctors, but now im on prescription :v

[frosty ice]

god damn getting on diy at 14 is impressive

[fervent grove]

Absolute kino

[inland schooner]

I was really fucking depressed my mum was like hell yeah cause I said it'd help

[frosty ice]

that's really cool tbh

[elder saffron]

I wish my family was supportive of me like that lol

Everyone collectively disowned me the moment I came out

[inland schooner]

I am definitely oversimplifying it for the sake of internet of which can be absolutely misleading. It really wasn't quite as simply and took alot of hours of trying to convince her to let me do it and my dad in the first place was 100% against it, so when I started, I didn't tell him for about 6 months or more (I can't remember)
However that's as a minor, since crypto currency can only be purchased by adults I needed an adult, if you're an adult amd in a situation where medically transitioning isn't something that will result in being kicked out or in strain, the process OF acquiring via diy is surprisingly simple, it costs a bit and requires research, but as does any medicine you're willing, just a little more caution

[elder saffron]

Gotcha

Yeah I started out my transition by DIYing for the first few years until I started going through Plume

[inland schooner]

I used steroid sites lol, but always checked

I think that was the most stressful part, hoping my 100$ would actually result in something, but it did, and I actually still have leftovers from when I switched to clinical

[elder saffron]

I remember stressing the first few times ordering E and blockers hoping I wasnt getting scammed lol

Thank god for countries that allow their citizens to just buy stuff OTC

[inland schooner]

T is super restricted here and im still a minor so its a pain in the ass to get prescribed

Fortunately I'm on 3 monthly injections so I forget about it alot

[elder saffron]

Damn you only have to inject 3 times a month?

xD on E I have to do it once every week

[mellow nimbus]

Yippee I forgot to mention this here but I got called a boy by a stranger yesterday lmao 🔥 🔥

[winter comet]

my husband still has leftover (sterile) needles and injection supplies from when he was on t so when i can get prescribed i have all of the stuff i need

he said he can also do my shots for me
i'm not squeamish about needles but why not get someone else to shoot you

[mossy thicket]

I'm going to grow a full beard to make cis men feel butterflies in their stomachs

[pulsar mortar]

t4t relationships are a gift from heaven

[winter comet]

true

[runic fable]

My sister is so transphobic and she doesn’t even realize 😔

I’m not out to my family, and regardless my sister likes to remind me how i’ll “never know what it’s like to be a woman.”

Tbf, she’s 10 and probably doesn’t know what a trans person is at all but it’s sucks hearing that

[elder saffron]

YES

I've dated cis women up until my current relationship with my girlfriend and it's genuinely been one of the best relationships ever. It's just so nice to be with someone who actually gets things about being trans ya know?