Hi guys. This is my first time ever speaking out in this server and i came just so i could open up what im going thru rn without fear of judgement cos i rlly need sum ppl to talk abt this with or just anybody to say its gonna be ok… this’ll be long so im gonna speak in text chunks (no i didnt rehearse what im abt to say 😭)
#I left my uni back in March cos of burnout and anxiety and now idk what to do abt my life…
compact condor
Ok so sum context: i live in the uk, and I am… well i was in my second year studying maths but honestly after suffering a lot of academic burnout as well as goin thru a lot of feels such as low self esteem and doubt which eventually spiralled into depression and anxiety, I had to literally dip from my university environment
I’ve been on temporary withdrawal since then
Rn I’m thinking abt permanently dropping out from that particular uni for various personal reasons and thinking of continuing my future plans closer to home
thing is idk exactly where tf to go from here cos mom keeps saying i should continue with a brand new uni this time next year just with a completely different course I’ll like but I don’t feel like playing trial and error with uni courses cos student loans are a pain in the ass and I can FEEL the stress regarding our money situation 😭
moreover I haven’t even told any of my irl friends at all abt my situation cos it’s a lot to unpack.
idk bru, like I spent a day sleep deprived tryna move outta my old student house away from ppl that I felt were very toxic, excluding and exhausting to live with
I spent nearly every day in uni (pretty much every day of my life) feeling I was never good enough or never smart enough or never socially apt enough to be around my peers who seemed to get on better w life and school and stuff
I’ve gotten yelled at a lot be my stressed out parents who have consistently made accusations that I’m lazy, that I wanna do nothing w my life and that my phone is brainwashing me and rotting my mind 😭
I’ve been in 12 sessions of NHS therapy which in itself was kinda frustrating and I personally feel I haven’t gotten a lot out of
I’ve been denied an adhd diagnosis which made me feel mad 😭
ugh idk I’ve feel like I’m going thru too much personal shit and I’m still taking forever to re build my confidence and self esteem that I can’t be bothered to think about my future career. like I don’t feel like going back to the uni life but at the same time I might be fucking myself over careerwise. I didn’t want this. and idk if I’m strong enough to deal w this
TL;DR I’m thinking abt permanently dropping out of my current uni, I have no idea wtf I wanna do next, I’m exhausted comparing myself to other ppl, I feel like nobody cares other than my parents, nhs therapy isn’t enough for me, and sometimes my mom and dad accuse me of of caring abt my phone rather than my future
-# oh also im a 20M and asian i prolly should started with that my bad ijbol 😭
-# urgent response would be highly appreciated
cloud quail
I respect your problems cuz were dealing with da same thing
But honestly stop comparing yourself too others the more you compare the more you hate yourself but building a future is hard but school is hard too the judgement, pressure and constant stress but things will be good soon hope. you pull through
Side note: hope this quote helps
I quote:
The hardest choices require the strongest wills
-from my friend