I feel like I need to get some stuff out | The Therapy Center | Page 1

I'm going to be posting poetry here. This is all about stuff that's happened to me, feel free to give feedback

Just a crush, then I found who I thought was the one
Told you, laughing, and you did too
But I didn’t see the pain in your eyes
I didn’t see the signs
I didn’t see the hurt

So oblivious, I couldn’t recognize
Someone going through a pain unbearable
One I’d experience
When it was too late
When I took too long

I cried, and you asked what was wrong
I said I’m fine, and you slid away

You cried, and I asked what was wrong
You told me, and I didn’t know what to do
If only I had given that embrace
You’ve longed for, and needed
And said, “It’s alright, you did well”

We grew apart, no more than a mere “Hi”
And then I saw, you two

I was trying to talk to him, be his friend, like I was
He was my best, and yet I couldn’t look at him
Staring at his phone, awaiting your response
I knew what he felt, for I felt it too

There was one difference, a major one, I wish we did too
Talk, you were friends, texting and calling
I saw the signs through his end, all the stickers and emoji’s
He said he didn’t know, whether or not you did, but I knew

It hurt

I helped you get with him, I saw the signs
Confronted you about it, and later you’d admit
It didn’t hurt at the time, not like it would later
But when I saw that smile on his face, and got no praise
I broke

I loved you, and yet I didn’t think to know it
And when I saw you with him, it hit me like a truck
When you love someone, you tell them that you do
I didn’t, and it broke me
I should have said something, anything
But always backed down
I had so many chances
And I didn’t take a single one

I saw you two on the bus, heads leaning, holding hands
Sat down and cried, in public
Cut myself out of everyone’s lives
Like a bruise on a banana, a toddler cried over

Stabbed in the back, I felt
Betrayed, though it was me
I didn’t say anything, when I should have
And now I’m broken

Messaged you to tell me how I feel
And you understood
But once I figured out, that I could have made a move
I stopped, and I started

I stopped talking, I stopped eating
I started cutting, I started thinking, crying
Scratching, nonstop under my clothes
Raw, bleeding

Then I knew you
I learned you, heard you
You’ve been through so much, and I was there for you
So I couldn’t leave
I had to stay

It hurt, seeing you two
And I lost a best friend
But I found a better one
One so well
I’d call her a sister

I loved you, and almost died because of it
But now, I love you, but not in the same way
I do more, but less
Like a sister, a kin, and not a crush
Not a lover

#I feel like I need to get some stuff out