im terrified of relationships

[vestal vale]

yall ngl my past relationships have left me a bit traumatized. i thought my most recent one would be the one but he turned out to be insane and extremely disloyal. when i swear to u he fooled me for 3 years to think he wasn’t. i hate to generalize men but it feels like they all end up cheating for some temporary connection with another. every girl i talk to about these thoughts essentially give me the advice of “all guys cheat, so choose the cutest one.” but idk, that seems so shallow and i tend to be picky cus my personality and interests don’t easily match with just anyone. i know im enough and eventually will be the one for someone that’s genuine, but like DAMN are all guys lustful and emotionally immature or am i meeting the wrong ones ?? cus at this point im considering just not taking any dude seriously anymore.

[quiet notch]

hey i understand where youre coming from and yea there are a lot of men who act like this, and it honestly just has something to do with them and nothing to do with you. they are immature and childish, and while i do understand where you're coming from, i do think there are plenty of men who will see you for who you are and see your worth, you just gotta find the right one. and you being "picky" is a great thing, which proves you know what you're worth and you shouldn't accept something that isn't right for you. you deserve better and i promise you that you will find someone when the time is right, i believe in you.

[vestal vale]

thank you so much for this, genuinely. i don’t want to fall into the “men ain’t shit” trope but damn it’s been hard to find clarity that there’s actual genuine guys out there after everything that’s happened to me. i probably just need to go out more- or something. but thank you, i hope all the best for you as well <3

[zinc portal]

a lot of men struggle with emotional regulation especially with lustful ideas, but people you should spend your time with should be able to control that and 100% not fool around with other people

ik it sounds obvious and blunt, but its really hard to find the right person, especially when most people have problems themselves and don't consider other people before themselves

[plush girder]

I understand how you feel and have been through the same thing as well

[vestal vale]

were u able to get past those feelings?

eventually

[plush girder]

Yes