Im a terrible person

[delicate rock]

@tribal merlin

Hey. I just want to say thanks for being real about everything. That’s not easy, and I can tell you’ve been carrying a lot. Loving someone while trying to survive your own battles is exhausting, and even if things didn’t work out the way you hoped, it doesn’t mean you failed. You were there, you tried, and that means something. When two people are struggling, sometimes love isn’t enough to hold everything together. That sucks, but it’s real. It doesn’t take away from what you had, it just means the weight got too heavy. I know it’s easy to blame yourself, to think you could’ve done more, but you were fighting your own war too. You can’t pour from an empty cup, no matter how much you love someone. Missing her is okay. Feeling lost right now is okay. It just means you cared. It just means you're human. But don’t let this make you forget your own worth. You're not meant to carry this pain alone forever. You’re not too much, and you’re not too late to find peace, to find connection, to feel okay again. It’s not gonna feel like this forever, even if it does right now. You don’t need to have everything figured out. Just take it one breath at a time. And when you’re ready, reach out. Even if it’s messy, even if it’s small. You deserve people who’ll meet you where you are. You're not alone, even if it feels like it right now. I’m still here if you need someone to talk to.

Feel free to reach out to me personally or on this thread if you would like to talk!

[tribal merlin]

I get the concept of not being able to pour if you are empty, but I cant accept that reason. If I really did love her, I could have done everything for her. My patience and warmth were just fogged by my emotions towards the situation. I cant take it anymore type of thing, if she'll do this then I can. But still not reasonable for me. Its probably my head got bigger, I got an ego by having a connection with her. I just miss the gal, I still do love her. But it will be more problematic and disrespectful to contact her. She wont even going to listen if I talk to her. I dont know the point of this, I just dont want to think about her anymore. I just wanna feel satisfied with loneliness again.

Ive tried everything, Ive tried reading through reddit and now here. But I just kept going back with the thoughts of her. Whenever I have a problem, especially about abandonment. I can easily get over with it but this one is so different. I cant even configure why I kept on coming back, If I hurt then move on right, learn the lesson. Jeez Im too old for this. But I cant control it no matter what Ill do, its the time that will heal it. Its an unbreakable cycle.

[delicate rock]

@tribal merlin

You’re not wrong for feeling any of this. When you love someone that deeply and it ends, especially in a way that feels unresolved, it’s going to tear you up for a while. That doesn’t mean you failed or that you’re weak. It just means you cared, and there’s nothing shameful about that. People act like you’re supposed to just move on or “be stronger,” but the truth is, healing doesn’t look like that. Some days you’ll feel okay and think you’ve let go, and the next, it hits you like you’re back at square one. That’s normal. What you’re feeling is grief, not just for her, but for the version of yourself that existed with her. And yeah, that’s going to take time. Start small, get out of your head when you can. Go outside, write it out, vent here, do anything that reminds you that your world still exists without her in it. That part’s hard, but it’s necessary. And just because you still miss her doesn’t mean reaching out would fix anything, and deep down you know that. Choosing not to contact her is you protecting both of you, even if it doesn’t feel that way. You’re not stuck, even if it feels like you are. You’re healing, and healing just looks like a mess sometimes. You're allowed to feel all of this, and you're still going to be okay.

While you say if you really did love her, you could have done anything for her?

The hard truth to accept, one that I'm having to right now?

Maybe you did everything you could for her.

That doesn't make you a bad person or your love for her any less.

but it truly is a necessary step in healing, is letting go. It's a lot easier said than done. I'm speaking like it's easy for me. It's not. I'm actively going through a 7 month breakup fallout.

It doesn't apply to you, but the loving girl I fell in love with?

I don't know her anymore.

Now I'm not saying that you two won't ever connect again, but you can't live off the hope that you might.

Grow!

become better!

I'm here if you need me, ok?

[tribal merlin]

Its hard if you realized that your the actual problem, shes being more active in socials and posting more happy quotes, renaming sad playlist into past tense, you name it. Also trying to break the cycle of looking back, from imagining and stalking. Im sorry you're also going thru a breakup right now man. The pain are almost the same, either youre a dumper or dumpee. But it becomes pointless when your ex partner already moved on and probably has a new one already, still its not hard to mourn for that person. I just dont like mourning for her anymore because I know she wont come back and she doesnt care about me, but I cant stop it because I know I was the problem during our relationship. I want a second chance, prove that I can change. But it wont happen and I wouldnt like it too, I dont want to be a problem to her anymore.

Goodluck to you for moving on man, we can do it. It will be hard, just dont forget the lesson we learned. Thanks for listening to my unfolding.

[supple ferry]

2d big titty girls are your best friend rn