My life literally has become this: wake up, get fresh, eat, go to class 4 hour and procrastinate without socialising or doing anything productive, come back home, eat, procrastinate for the rest of the day, sleep. I feel like I am doing nothing productive in my life, I used to be good a good student who would socialise with everyone, get good grades, etc. Now all I have become is a useless, aimless, pointless person who just lives off his parents money. Unlike other kids I never go out of my house unless for class, stopped getting good grades and barely passes tests. I don't even have any talent or hobby I can stick to. I don't have anyone to talk to anymore and I just feel extremely empty. This has been going on for 2 years now and because of this I am starting to get stressed about myself. My parents, teachers, family have high hopes from me but I am about to ruin their expectations and I can't even control it even though I know it's going to happen. I have become so useless, aimless, pointless, empty that it is slowly growing on me. I am starting to question my existence, my purpose. I don't have motivation to do anything anymore. It's grown on me so much I started googling my problems and they told me to get therapy. I didn't want to ask my parents for this since I feel like a complete failure as a son so I just decided to take online therapy. I don't have a talent, no purpose, no friends, no future, no motivation, no lover, nothing. I have absolutely nothing going on in my life. Just thinking about my parents and how good they treated me, took care of me aches my heart because I know they are never going to be proud of me again so I stopped talking to them to. I have never talked to anyone about this. The emptiness has grown on me so much that I am feeling it wouldn't even matter if I end myself.
#Useless
long kayak
Except for my parents no one would ever care I would be just one less. Sure my parents would be very sad but after 2 to 3 years they would move on and live normal lives. They won't have to spend money on me, take care of me, worry about me anymore.