need friendship advice

[wind walrus]

so firstly i think ill start by saying that ive known them for around 5 yrs now? the friendship started off rly well but as time passed it started to fall.. its already almoast fallen completely like 3 times but i kept forgiving them as i was a bit dumb back then,,,, but now its just been COMPLETELY off for the past 2 months or so which definitely doesnt happen often for THIS LONG and im sick of it

id say it started around when summer of this yr came, basically it was the last day of us going to the same class n school, and during summer we didnt talk at ALL, in all honesty they ghosted me for like 2 months (they did the same last summer aswell, they also just.. ghost randomly?? like even if i see them irl theyd still ghost me. even if we had to TALK FOR SCHOOL theyd still keep ghosting me.) , and on the last month of summer break we started talking again and we met up for a friends bday. everything felt fine but JUST as school started it fell apart so quick. we dont go to the same class anymore so we dont see eachother daily so thats def something that adds on, but like it just also seems like they hate me?.. like being so dry and selfish out of nowhere to the point when it genuinely PISSES me off. once they literally got mad at me cuz i found a "funny" joke of theirs not funny, and trust me it REALLY wasnt funny at all. also theyre hypocritical af, they said how they hate ppl who talk abt their bf 24/7 and now they do the same shit, this isnt the ONLY thing tjo i coild go ages listing stuff but i wont as thatll make this 4939393 times longer

like theres so much to add on but like idek.. the thing is my life would be SO much better without them. like this past month im ngl lifes been a bit better without them but like id feel so guilty to leave. this friendship rly means alot to me i guess.. so many memories and stuff but its just THEM that ruins it. id hate to leave but i feel like its the best to do but im just not sure. like atm theyve been ghosting me fir like around a week and im just thinking of having a srs talk w them abt all of this but ik damn well they cant handle mature talks so i feel like its just useless. should i just somehow keep this "friendship" going or should i just be honest and say how i feel abt it??

like i just dk id feel so bad cuz ive done so many things with them but now they just feel.. useless now?? and i feel like they feel the same way even though theyve done ALOT for me but i feel like it was all fake or shit especially as ik what theyre really like.

like i know nothing lasts forever but i really dont wanna think that its all ending here and like this too. like i know theyre a bad person (not only for the reasons i lsted. theyre a bit... weird in general and a ton og other stuff) but i just idek like a part of me WANTS to leave but a part of me doesnt.

another thing is ik damn well that if i told them i want to end this friendship on PEACEFUL terms (both sides agreeing to it) theyd just say shit like "oh ill be better im sorry" "oh its my fault ill fix it all" or start threatening me with ||suicide|| which i dont want at ALL 🙃.. it happend a few times, just with other topics and i dont want it happening again. now thinking my life would 100% be more peaceful without them but i just need to make sure that im doing the right thing here ATLEAST for myself. im sick of forcing myself to be with someone that makes my life miserable