I always feel like I'm hated by people, even tho I'm not. I tried to become a silent guy, but failed

[brisk blade]

So can y'all help?

[regal lagoon]

Well that depends on the situation, like what makes you believe you're hated by those online/those who surround you and what ways there are to fix it. I'm also not sure what the term 'silent guy' means completely but I'm guessing it has something to do with withdrawal. If it's a matter of struggling to be who you are because of your environment I recommend finding groups outside that (whether it be online or irl) to find something to balance it out. It could be groups off of your interests, believes, etc that you feel comfortable being in. If it's only a matter of you not being able to believe people don't hate you, then it could be a form of self hatred inside that prevents you from believing that you're any better than that you believe to be. Its like the term "you are your own worse critic", and your beliefs can alter how you view the world and other people. I recommend looking into forms of self love or reassurance, take some time off for yourself if possible even for a few minutes. Find a way to ground yourself and be able to implant the thought "I am worthy of love" in some form. It doesn't have to be all that fancy at first either. This isn't the healthiest way to but I've created OCs in my head and just the way I know they would treat me knows that I'm somewhat worthy of being cared for despite past actions. Everyone deserves some form of companionship because monsters aren't born they're made.

If it's not a form of self hate and it's more of people feeling dishonest with you then Id see that as a form of abuse/manipulation it's just a theory but if you are in this situation try to either 1 share your side of the story, emphasizing how you feel but don't make it seem like you're attackig the person so they don't get defensive and create misunderstandings between the both of you or 2 set healthy boundaries amongst yourself it could be "you can't talk to me from this time to this time" or "only 1 complaint per day" these might sound extreme but you're important and wtv you need to do that would benefit your mental health is worth trying. Sry this is so long sometimes I can js spiral into a bunch of weird sounding shit but I hoped this helped in some way and hope you feel better <3

[brisk blade]

Alr, u actually raised some doubts about myself, but good ones. U amde me reliase im actually a bit too hrash on myself, as i usually treat it badly, but there have been times where i told it i belive in u and such. Anyway, u told me to share a side of my story, so here i am:
In school, I see evryone hanging out with each other, but I sit alone. I tend to try to engage, but people seem to not keep the flow of convos with me. Maybe....people dont like engage much with me for the fact that we dont share much in common. Maybe perhaps something I can't see in myself, or smth i see but ignore. I get bullied, but just ignore the bullying. I get wrongfully accused, but just go along with it. I tried to isolate myself after noticing this, but it just doesn't work for me as im extroverted. Some people did ask about me when they noticed i took a more isolated nature, and i told them im fine, cuz i wont tell them the truth. Maybe my vision is blurry, maybe i dont see things truly, maybe the problems with them, but i highly doubt it as its pretty abnormal for such a lot of people to not be interested in me.

[regal lagoon]

I'm glad you're able to ignore bullies and most false accusations about you, it's a very good skill to have. It sounds to me like you're somewhat confused Abt what kind of person you are or how to interact with your environment at least. It could be that you're trying to associate yourself with the wrong people, which isn't necessarily a bad thing but it could be harder to make friends if 1 you're struggling with identity or 2 you don't really know where to begin. If possible you could try getting out of your comfort zone or exploring different types of people/groups in your section that would match your personality / interests to make conversations a little easier for you.

[brisk blade]

ok thank u : )