#Talked to hundreds of people and cannot find my life partner

121 messages · Page 1 of 1 (latest)

umbral void
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Hello, I have been talking offline and online to so many people, yet I have not found anyone that is interested in getting to know me for a long-term, loving relationship...
I am kind, affectionate, and caring; I am smart, passionate about a lot of different interests, and very hardworking, yet I still struggle so much with finding someone.
I know damn well that there is nothing wrong with me, and I know that if I did find someone just like me, I would be very happy, meaning that I am a person who is capable of getting into a long-term loving relationship.
But the problem is that even though I do take action and try to talk to as many people as I can and ask other people to help introduce me to others, I still do not find
It's like the number of people that I have tried to talk to now is so big that this starts being very annoying. Why is it so hard, and how can I find someone?
For some context, I live in Morocco, which is a muslim country. I am not muslim. Dating here is weird because, on one hand, the kind of girl I am looking for has this weird mindset that they do not want to get into relationships... and also, I am not really looking to be with these kinds of people. We do not share the same values, culture, religion mindset. It's like I cannot even have conversations with most of these people. We live in two different dimensions. I feel a complete disconnect and a lake of intellect.
And on the other hand, even online people do not actually spend the time to try and get to know me once I explain my intenssions and desires. I always try to keep it clear and say it upfront due to the fact that I have to try with so many people, and I cannot afford to spend 1 hour with 100 people just to find out that no one is interested. That's 100 hours.

i cannot leave morocco for the moment, until i finish my 4 year degree

marsh reef
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Boo is a great dating app, that's where I found my boyfriend. Also can be used to just find some friends. The app automatically recommends you people who could be compatible with your personality and interests.

umbral void
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but just so you know, the experience of a man & a women are very different

summer jolt
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You'll bunp into one when you least expect it, just give it time. I understand the frustration, I suggest you focus on doing what makes you happy, a hobby you can also share and spend online with others and focus on the hobby, if you meet someone along is that friend or potential for more that is just a bonus then, focus on the fun part till one day you bump into one. Sometimes we focus to much and miss out on what is out there.

steep veldt
umbral void
umbral void
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and people who are like me, are soooo rare

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that i might as well play the lottery, and would have higher chances of success

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especially as a man

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online is my best bet

umbral void
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you have no idea of how much volume of people a man has to get through to find a decent person that is interested in them,
you are in the receiving hand so that is why this advice from your perspective makes sens

umbral void
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but its really not realistic

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i am not intrested in making friends that does not making me happy at all

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and by default when i do talk to someone i naturally slowly drop all of the other relationships

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and its a good thing i am looking for someone just like that ...

umbral void
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rather then putting it talking to people that i know will never be that person im looking for

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i enjoy spending time alone a lot more then spending it with people

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so naturally i can only really talk and be invested into 1 person at a time

umbral void
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like i spend my time writing out ideas for videos on youtube, and programming, and playing single player games and such ...

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the ideal way for me to be able to make progress on things i am working towads

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is loneliness and deep focus

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i perform best when i isolate myself

summer jolt
umbral void
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like when i used to play league and such online games

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i meet only dudes

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same with tech

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and business

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maybe one or two occasional girls here and there

summer jolt
umbral void
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for me to find that person

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when i said hundreds i really mean it

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like just in the last couple of days

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i think the sentence i am not ready for relationship

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i heard it at least 15 times

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in less then a week of me talking to girls

umbral void
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i was not exaggerating

umbral void
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1h x 100 = 100h

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like

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Leya...
girls are the rare commodity
im really sorry to compare you guys with objects i DO NOT mean that girls are that but im trying to explain an idea

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girls are in demand

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while boys are not

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so thats why

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i keep saying thats not enough volume

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because i GENUATLY need to message hundreds of people, just to get about 25% that respond, from these i talk to them only maybe 5% are interested and open for getting to know me

summer jolt
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it takes time to build a connection with a person before you just get to the point they'll want to become your life / partner. I am sorry but the way how you explain it, feels like you expect to go into a store, and hope you'll find a person you can spend the rest of your life with, I am sorry but as you noticed world does not operate like that. I suggest you take more relaxing approach and build genuine connection with people before you even ask them if they are interested into you, give them time to get to know you, you'll stand a better chance then. Love you'd like to spend the rest of your life with you is worth years of wait 😊 I suggest you leave counting hours behind, watch on time spent never did anybody good, unless you are a F1 driver.

umbral void
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thats the thing....

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i have spent in the past

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6 years

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with a girl

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just to get her to say no

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i cannot afford

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to spend that much time

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i need to make my intenssions clear

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this is why im talking to you, are you open to it yes no, can you help yes no, if both are no, then i move on to someone else

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i cannot afford to spend 5 hours with a girl

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just to have her say

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oh no i dont want relationships

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or oh no i have a boyfriend

summer jolt
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what are you rushing towards?

umbral void
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what ?

summer jolt
umbral void
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like, at all

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i do not enjoy having friends

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i have a clear goal in mind

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i need to prequalify the person as fast as possible

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are they intrested yes or no

umbral void
umbral void
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thats the thing ...

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the only thing i value is spending time with that person i am looking for

summer jolt
umbral void
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what do you mean ? who are you reffering to

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like the girl im looking for

summer jolt
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yes

umbral void
summer jolt
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the person you are looking after

umbral void
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i am the kind the only value time spent with that person i will be with so i am looking for someone like that too

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in fact

summer jolt
# umbral void i have a clear goal in mind

OK now I understand your full approach to certain extent. I am going to withdraw myself here from attempting to support as I do not feel I am suited for helping you here based on what you shared, mainly because I do not have experience in that approach.

If I put myself in that situation I'd go with what was suggested, all the apps and just put it out there, might even make ad in the papers. If you are determined to continue that path, then there is a change you bump into someone that is doing the same out there, not high probability but there is a chance there is another person out there doing the same as you 🙂 I wish you best of luck in your search!

umbral void
# umbral void in fact

i am the kind of person that cannot even develop friendships because by default once i talk to someone i drop the rest
so i am looking for someone like that too

umbral void
summer jolt
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typo, ad, as an advert

umbral void
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ad kekW

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🤣

summer jolt
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i mean, isn't that the fastest haha

umbral void
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no not really girls do not engage with that ...

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i mean ...

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technically

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check ur dm

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one guy did it

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and they are married and have a baby soon
you know that Never Give Up guy on youtube

summer jolt
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as i said, sadly no xp there in that area, so I hope somebody else can come up with better proposals, but i feel you shared a lot of details now that people can understand what you are seeking after from this thread

umbral void
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anyway thanks

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for your opinions and advice

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ill try boo

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and keep trying

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i have a bunch of wing girls out there helping introduce me to girls too

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and i do go out with some ppl

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trying also IRL not only online, even if its unluckly, but i did have a relationship with a non muslim girl in the past here in morocco so i do try

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thanks for advice

umbral void
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hey

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so update

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i made an account on boo

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bought a sub

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and verified my pics

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and now i'm msging ppl

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8$ for a life sub that's cheap