should i do it?

[shy coyote]

hi
i was thinking this summer that if is good to break up with my bf
i dont remember what he did in spring but really upset me and i didnt recover well since then
i fell like a mom cuz i do almost everything
i am shaking right now and i am verry scared
i am also scared cuz we shoud move toghether but is mot stable this idea and he give s an on\of vibe and i dont fell good or happy idk...
he didnt really act like a man, but he is older than me
afterevry time we see eachother i have to clean evrything, i coock all the time, i buy all the food, sometime i have to do his job and i dont really fell like a women most of the time
is hard and idk what to do
i am scared that i dont have the courage to breack up cuz i dont wanna be alone but at the same time he didnt do much in life and he dont know many basic things and is so annoying sometime
he dont have something stable to work not he want but want children and i 100% dont want.. idk.. a bit of help plz?

i dont see how he can change something to change my mind
i m in my 2 year of uni out of 3 and is the hardest
my life is getting serious and i need some stable thing i cant just wait for him to get up from the chouch after 10years to finnaly work some low ahh job and expect me to do all the other things..
i tryed to talk some of the problems with him but i dont see a change in time just for like a 2week and he was back to before
but in the last week it was a bit better but i fell like is a bit late(he make me a sandwich, some tea when i want it and 2 time go for groceries

(sorry if i have bad eng😔)

[spark pollen]

Most of what you've mentioned isn't clear cut and honestly seems like a minor issue, except the children part. It's hard to imagine how you'd move and settle down together if you don't agree on whether you should have children or not.

[shy coyote]

sorry if it seems unclear
i have a lot of things in my mind

on short words he is immature, not very smart, he dont like to work not want to, he see it as a sacrifice and want me to support him like a shugar mommy
he isnt serious abot the future and didnt have somethins stable
and i fell like a mom cuz i do all the work
he is still at his parrents house and dont know to do much things or what is need to survive

i really dont want to move in with him somewhere cu he dont have a stable work and things to work "just for a wile(1-2months)"

we dont go out a lot and when we do is 50\50 or i pay for things
only on special days like our anyversary day he take me out somewhere

idk if this is clear

[spark pollen]

Yes it's clear now. It just makes it even harder to imagine how there will be a future for this relationship.
If all what's preventing you from leaving is the fear of being alone, then that fear will always be there. So better do it sooner than later.

[shy coyote]

should i do it?
now i fell like i still love him but in the morning when i was at uni i didnt fell this a lot
and when he was at me i didnt fell that love a lot

he seems to still like a lot but i fell like he isnt aware of most things

idk

i fell weird

and sad

[spark pollen]

Feelings go up and down all the time so they're not a reliable thing to make a decision with.
If all what you told me is that you can't agree on whether you should have children or not, I'd tell you to leave. It's just not possible to make it work on the long term that way, unless one of you changes their opinion.
In addition, he's not serious about the future and doesn't like to work, so how are you going to live together that way?

[shy coyote]

idk
i wont give up my idea of not wanting kids
he stay so chill maybe cuz his dad has a company and they have money, but they arent on good terms and i dont see him work till retirement and i wont put my trust in his parrents for my safety
the parrents are also weird , like they want him home to start another company but 0 moves in that direction

they yell at one another

'this is how we talk"

i have traums with yelling
he yelld at me in the summer and i hate it, he cant be calm to dont lose the lucidity

i dont need another crazy person to yell at me when we dont agree
i live with such person all my life and i relly start to heal now that i am alone for uni

[spark pollen]

Yeah so it's becoming clear that making this work out is going to be a big challenge.

[shy coyote]

yea..
oh and also he says he will lose weight in the summer
he was so confident and all of that
he didnt.
i did cuz i stick to my word

he didnt have a strong will
i do and i know i can do things

but is a bit of a burden that the first thing he do is to give up EVRY SINGLE TIME