My parents got a divorce around a year ago, probably longer. After my dad moved out, its just been my mom, my 2 brothers, and me for a while now. My mom has never been someone I've liked. Not in the way that "oh she took away my phone and told me to go to bed boohoo", in the way that she is extremely passive-aggressive, manipulative, selfish, hypocritical, and immature. I've never really been able to have my own interests if they aren't "approved" by her, I can't be interested in computers or video games or fixing broken stuff, to her I have to be doing every single sport and going to every summer camp or activity she can find on facebook. Recently, she's been having these "degrading sessions" as i call them with me and my 12 year old brother where she basically spends a half hour calling us names and making fun of us for what we like and have interests in, and we can't respond to her at all. If we don't say the exact thing she wants us to say, or react how she wants us to, she gets mad at us again and proceeds to call us more terrible shit.
#I feel so trapped
chilly wing
about a week ago, she "caught" me having a P addiction, in reality I was looking through some of my discord DM's just to chat with my friends and happened to have my pants off since it was very hot in my room
she's decided to start attempting to lock down my computer as much as possible so it's basically a paperweight, but she's too stupid to figure out how it works
so she's been taking it out on me saying that "if you don't get it working then you just can't have a computer"
i don't know what to do, i would call CPS but i don't feel like these problems are big enough that they will care
i want to get therapy, but i know my mom would find a way to listen in so she can find out more that she doesn't deserve to know.
grave inlet
i want to get therapy, but i know my mom would find a way to listen in so she ca...
Can you live with your dad?
chilly wing
he's across the continent
he's extremely neglectful and living with his mom
he hasn't been working for a while now so that he doesn't pay us child support
plus he's made some terrible accusations to me and my siblings that have ended with me threatening to ||kill|| him if he even considers coming anywhere near us
grave inlet
I see, sounds horrible
chilly wing
i have no idea what to do or if i'm even able to do anything
grave inlet
What do you need therapy for actually? Only this specific problem?
chilly wing
lots of different stuff
but i've been having trouble with motivation the past few years
i was raised that i'm basically not allowed to have an opinion or state it, so it's very hard for me to tell people that i know what i really think
i feel like i'm supposed to be ashamed of the things and people I care about, but i'm not
i have self esteem issues, trust issues, commitment issues
i want to stick some iron in my mouth and pull the trigger almost every other week, but i don't want to leave my siblings with just my mom
i know that she would get even worse without me there to protect them and take the blows
grave inlet
Yeah it's true. I guess for now you just bide your time until you can move out.