senna journal time hurray!

[haughty shard]

wednesday august 7, 2024
it’s 5:01 pm and im out with my friends rn. i’m feeling good!! it’s really hot and i had to walk really far to come meet them. we got starbucks and subway. i love hanging out with them, it’s been a while since we met up and we’re planning to go out more! honestly they’re my favourite people and i seriously don’t know what i would do without them.. :3 i will be updating more later on in the day, if you made it this far, i love you!! thanks for reading

ermm it’s 11:02 pm right now and i got my period😔this is so sad chat. honestly the only thing im scared of are my mood swings…. like i wanna open up to people about what im feeling but i can’t flipping describe my emotions well on my period. i miss my friends a lot and im super scared of failing them or losing them. they’re my everything i love them so much :,(
bro i literally feel like im chasing after a celebrity every time i be texting my friends tho cuz tell me why if i don’t text first (to some of my not so close friends) ion even get a single message for the entire day?? “delivered 5hours” girl what the flip open my message i know damn well u got nothing else going on. LIKE SRSLY im tired of my attachment issues cuz i dont wanna be clingy, i just wanna talk i swear..! please talk to me, i need u guys..! just open my messages and respond….!!! i love u guys!!!! why am i texting kanye west everyday gang??😭

[haughty shard]

thursday august 8, 2024
it’s 2:25 am and im so jealous and angry..!!!!! i have crazy attachment issues and i am soooo horrified of people i like leaving me! send help im losing it. at the same time im tired of always being the one to speak first. it’s like people be relying on me to create conversation all the time now :(. but that’s okay..! ummmm.!.!!! i’m acting really childish right now!! i just wanna be loved

uhhh its 4:21 pm right now and i literally ugh!!!! i woke up at 11 in the morning or so and my personal space got absolutely violated. ;-; my room is honestly the only place i feel safe at and i was already having a tough morning with period cramps.. my grandma let a stranger into my room WHILE I WAS STILL IN BED. im seriously so done?? wheres my privacy at? im going through it, all i ask for in return is time to rot in bed. alone.

its 10:32 pm and i dont even know what to think of the day i just had.. like i somehow kept getting in trouble with my dad although i didnt do nothing? ive been pretty lost the entire day. usually mood swings dont hit me hard but it certainly has now. i got arizona and a new toner..!! im working on convincing my mom to let me dye my hair and get my nails done again.

[haughty shard]

friday august 9, 2024
g’day chat!! it’s 7:11 pm right now. i woke up at 1 pm. today, my family and i are going to watch a show and have dinner at a restaurant! i went to boston pizza for lunch and had a burger and a cocktail! the drink was really good but way too sweet for my liking. i’ll come back after the show for a review and more updates

so its 9:45 pm right now and i have been informed that we werent having dinner at a restaurant :,(..!! but the show was nice, it was like an immersive experience with bubbles and cool visuals and allat. not gonna lie it was a sensory overload but pretty at the same time. im getting boba again today and life has been pretty good. i still cant get over my jealousy and anger.. which definetly sucks. more updates later!!

[haughty shard]

saturday august 10, 2024
good afternoon chat, its 1:45pm right now and i just wanted to write down the dream i had.. i just graduated elementary school so it was very nice to see my classmates in my dream again. we were hosting the end of the year talent show and me, charlie, miyah, divyanne, rosanna, and a lot of other classmates were there. i missed seeing their faces. my teacher, ms. watts, was stressing over the preparation as per usual. eventually when the show was about to start, i went to the changing room to check on my classmates helping there. i saw marcus. love the kid. charlie comes out saying something about being hungry. i follow her and as usual, she gave me something to eat. just like irl when i would ask for her food and she would so graciously give me a bit. i miss my classmates, theyre my second family. i love them so much.
anyways im gonna be going out to the mall with my best friend today. im not planning on buying much but ill update when im back. lots of love!!

so i ended up going to the mall with my best friend :3 weeks ago spent time just getting drinks and eating.. we got kfc which im super freaking grateful for!!! i got a new redbull racing t-shirt and omg i love it so much.. my bsf was gonna get some kpop photo cards but her mom said no and she was really pressed which i actually understand. i felt the same way (or even worse) when we went to the porsche dealership nearby and the ONLY CAR i came there for was gone. :/ i was so pissed, i wanted to see it so bad but whatever i guess.. we had a good time and we’re gonna hang out with the whole group on monday

[haughty shard]

august 25, 2024

chat long time no update, i’ve been meaning to for a long time but i never got to it.. :( it’s 12:25 am rn and my thoughts are so loud ..! i need a girlfriend so so so SO BAD. i’m getting lonely :( when is it my turn to love again

[haughty shard]

i’m sad

cuz i wanna love

i wanna love so bad

but i can’t imagine myself in a relationship anymore

idk why it’s so hard

i want real love

undying love

honestly i hate being lonely