im such an failure

[barren hazel]

You can't control how other people act, but you absolutely have control over who you are. Think about the type of person you would like to be, then reverse engineer that image to the skills it would require and set reasonable goals for yourself. If you want to be fit, start by going on a 30 minute walk every morning. If you want people to like you, find a few role models and learn the behaviors that made you like them. I can give more specifics, but hopefully this makes sense to you

Again, you can't control how other people act. It comes down to being the type of person you'd like to be seen as

The most important thing is for you to do something. Nobody is coming to save you, the change has to be from you