Someone who I was very close with romantically from over a year ago who I still had feelings for dumped me as a friend back in September, so I thought. Started to gaslight me, pretend to forget all of our time together and blocked me and all in all cut off contact. This was months ago and we still don’t talk, I have acknowledged he’s probably not a very good person for me to be around. Still though, I see myself still thinking about him lots and somehow missing him. I started going to therapy to help this point and move on, but so far it hasn’t worked yet. I feel weird with other people who may have a crush on me and even my other friends since I’m so dissociated from this world and somehow still fixated on him. I can’t exactly name the emotion, but it feels like pain. Someone I’m close to who I had dinner with mentioned him by name and if I had still talked to him or not, I diverged the conversation since they were none the wiser of everything since I didn’t want to go into it. It’s supposed to be all in the past, right… I know he’s moved on, I know he doesn’t like me or whatever, and I know I still am holding on for some reason. I’m just sad and confused that I still feel hurt this time later. The only people I’ve liked in a love way I feel was some form of emotion erupting from a memory of him. I was happy with him but had trust issues and was constantly anxious. Anyways I feel ashamed of my current emotions and that I for whatever reason just can’t let go. I feel like I have a lack of self esteem and I admire him, but that I also don’t have the strength to realize my own positives. It’s hard to be by myself with these memories being invasive and I’m just confused. Why can’t I move on and why do I feel dominated by someone who barely shows up in my life anymore.
#Confused emotionally
gloomy hemlock
amber crag
Hey! i had the same exact problem and here are some tips,focus on more things that you love. And i know thinking about this person a lot can be tough,i know you said that he has moved on but maybe you need to also,focus on school,job,and family. Dont worry, you can do this and stay freaking strong!! (Dm's are always open if you need someone to chat with!!)
gloomy hemlock
Hey! i had the same exact problem and here are some tips,focus on more things th...
I really appreciate this advice and I have been following this on my own for months, however i find it hard to ground myself in the world and not on these thoughts that seem to always be somewhat present and takes me out of the world. I am also someone who aspires for love and am still hung on a past relationship. The fact they view me in a dispensable way and for some reason I feel as if I care about them in some way more than other close people in my life or my interests. My interests and friends have lost their spark since I feel impacted by this person who left me months ago. I’m someone as I said who also has trust issues, and unfortunately because of this I get anxious near some people who I feel I can’t set boundaries with. Besides all that, I’m just struggling to assimilate and be calm since I’m struggling to be my own person with these memories and thoughts somewhat being present in my mind.
I’m at a point where I’m very frustrated with myself that I can’t let go. He can let go and move on so easily, and I feel like I’m still attached to the thoughts and keep playing in my mind
I appreciate the DM offer