#Insecure about Singlehood & Virginity

9 messages · Page 1 of 1 (latest)

trim mortar
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How do I stop feeling insecure?

Context:
Yes, I have attended a single session of psychiatrist and he has diagnosed me with social anxiety, prescribing me with a single med.
I'm 17yrs and I know this is Too early to worry about this, however knowing something and feeling it are different. I seriously do not want answers that explain the advantages of singlehood because:

  1. I have read too many reddit or quora posts.
  2. I know that singlehood is indeed not as bad as many make it out to be. Maybe even underrated.
    However, I'm really struggling with just the thought that I'd never be intimate with anyone and I'd never be loved... damn, it's just painful.
    I also feel really insecure that I'm a virgin. The blame for this can be placed on my previous social group.
    I masturbate a lot. It can even go upto thrice or 4 times a day. I have severe mood swings and I'm tired all the time. I used to be frustrated and angry but now that many of my pressures have gone, I'm kinda chill.
    I also have a very supportive mother who, even if backward in regards to sex/relationships, is such a dear! I'm not entirely sure if I can discuss this with her...

TL;DR - Undergoing therapy & Medicated, Desperate but know that's stupid, Masturbate a ton and supportive but backward Mom.

native summit
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Man, being 17 and being on meds already is crazy

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Can never trust these psychiatrist

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It seems like the only thing you need to take care of id the way you view virginity and your habits of porn addiction

uncut jasper
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You gotta love yourself before someone can love you

trim mortar
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I've no idea whether I can love myself...

elfin pier
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It's hard to love yourself
Believe me
I struggle with it

But you have to learn not to see only the bad crap about yourself and see the good things too. If you can't love yourself then you can't love another person in their flaws. No one is perfect

It takes time but it helps

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And I get being single is hard but you're still just 17. Not 27. You have so much time

Plus let me be dead honest. This world revolves so much around sex that people are getting messed up and can't even think properly anymore when it comes to love. Don't worry about losing your virginity yet. Just focus on yourself and the good things life has to offer besides sex and love

Plus in my opinion. You can't just smash a random person ykwim? Because it's like you leave a piece of you with that person for forever and you won't get it exactly back (mentally ofc). So just wait until love comes your way

And also I get that it's hard with a supportive mother to speak things like this with her. It's the same with me. So find a trusted mentor or person you can talk about these things to. They can also help you get courage to bring it up with your mom.

You're a awesome person. Don't ever forget that. Whether life sucks one day or whether it's amazing another. No matter what things will be good. May be hard to see it but you will soon I promise

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And my suggestion is start journaling. All your thoughts, pains, etc. it helps a lot to write things out.

Also sorry for the spam 😭 hope this helped