Teal#3540 has been warned
#I'm so sick of everything. I'm just the fuckup im just the walking jailcase waiting to happen..
pseudo spearBOT
Teal#3540 has been warned
rigid jewel
I'm so sick of everything.. I feel like im so judged everywhere i go I'm so sick of hearing people telling me to "accept myself" so what i just lie to myself? and go hooray for me because im a great guy?? I cant do it so easily.. I dont think im going to commit anytime soon but the thought comforts me, knowing that in all this hell i can get out. I'm just so done okay? Im so alone and it all just goes crazy in my head. Everyone around me looks at me like im just a walking jail case waiting to happen just one bad day and just like that im done. My own family.. My own family said i'd be lucky to come out of school a druggie I'm just worthless. Any dream or goal i have everyone around me turns it to crap for me, im so sick of getting half ahh advice, im so sick of all of it i just need help but professionals make me feel like crap with their manipulation saying "helping you feels like hitting a brick wall" yeah maybe if you put actual thought into what you were saying and not giving me stuff i can easily google.. Its just i am nothing, im just a waste of space, i dont know why i waste my time i have never been so alone in my life, i have no one and it hurts, i try clubs but i dont get along with anyone, i cant sleep, i cant eat, im having hallucinations that drive me up the fing wall im blanking out and disassociating from reality all the time . I just feel so worthless, i beat myself up so fing hard and i dont know why, and no self help doesnt help.. I just feel like a wreck and absolute mess and frankly im so fing miserable with myself i dont even know why i havent put a bullet in my head yet, ill purposely put myself in dangerous situations like walking across narrow platforms high up knowing if i took one misstep id die Im so alone okay... it hurts so much..i have no one..