Social skills 101 pls

[drowsy perch]

I’ll try make this short.

I’ve been in a very close friend group up until the age of 11, we basically grew up together so we never had to learn how to make friends or socialise properly. I then moved country and now I have to use the social skills I never learnt because I never had to use.

I’ve been talking to more people, it’s helped me be more socially aware but not really with talking to people. I have mild social anxiety due to my lack of social skills so I think it’s a two birds with one stone kinda thing. Any tips on how to improve social skills?

[brisk wolf]

all u need is experience. try socializing online before going up to someone in real life. making connections online would be a great first step. ofc it wouldn't be the same but knowing & realizing that u could easily talk to anyone and all u hve to do is approach them, is a great reminder that u can build friendships and connection irl, it all starts with a simple hello/hi. just go out there, really. u'll know more once you get to experience it. deep breathe & go for it, embrace the awkwardness, the shyness...everything. we're all imperfectly perfect in our own way.

[drowsy perch]

I’m fine with online socialising but I think the scariest thing for me is not knowing what to say after saying “hi”. I’ve tried to have small talk conversations with strangers before and I always feel really boring, idk how some people are so good at socialising.

I agree with the practising thing def, the only thing is I’m not sure how to practise. It’s easier for me to take small steps but once you are in a conversation with a stranger it’s not like you can go over notes in your head. I want to learn as quickly as possible

[brisk wolf]

keep in mind that in order to hve a conversation, u need to at least hve someone to talk w/. u don't hve to always make the efforr to make things interesting in the convo. it only gets boring when the other person doesn't want to communicate, in that case, try to exit respectfully & go talk to other ppl.

succesful conversations/socializing depends on so may things, most conversations don't rlly look like how the movies/shows or any media portrays it to be. small talks are fine. we do it most, if not, all the time. after greeting the other person, try to complimemt their look or whatever it is u can compliment abt them (there's a ton), just be genuinely interested in them, questions will naturally come.

don't go too personal on the questions tho, i assume u've just met the person u're talking to

[drowsy perch]

Thx! This helps <3