- How many button presses in a day are we talking?
- Are you already in the ESP32 ecosystem? I ask because I'm not and the reason is it sounded like it was going to take a bit more time to get up to speed than I had available.
- I'm sorry to ask the obvious, but you've certainly determined a Z-wave thermostat (or similar) can't meet your needs?
A long time ago I tried to use optocouplers on a project and found they don't work "just like relays" as I hoped they would. I can't remember the details, but in my case I needed to add additional components that made me just switch to mechanical/reed relays. Hence my question about how many button presses.
You may also be able to use a little digital IO module, ideally something that could be powered from the power on that AC controller unit. You could possibly connect IO pins from the module directly to the switches to drive the pins on the processor. in other words, instead of simulating switch presses by connecting those pads on the PCB you would actually put the 3v or 5v signal on the Input pins on the controller processor. Assuming you trace/tone those switch pads back to IO pins on the processor. And I mention powering the module from the AC controller to avoid any ground-loop, mains adapter induced magic smoke.
Note: I barely know what I'm talking about, in fact I may be wrong on some points but I dont' think so. LOL