Pairing Nanoleaf Matter Thread Lightbulb with 8 digit code

[still berry]

After restarting HA, HA can't connect with the bulb anymore. I tried removing it from HA, then pair it again, but I just can't get HA and the bulb to pair again.
I tried reinstalling OTBR, which also did not help. I use a sky connect.

Last time I paired it it worked something like this: Pair with Nanoleaf app via Bluetooth -> Add to Thread Network -> I get a new HA device via apple homekit
but now it just doesn't work anymore, the Nanoleaf app can see the Thread network and try to add the bulb to it but it seem like HA doesn't accept it
the new HA "add Matter device" option also doesn't work because the bulb only has an 8 digit code but the option needs an 11 or 22 digit code to even try

This entire time my eve energy switch has no problems connecting with HA over Thread+Matter

Pairing Nanoleaf Matter Thread Lightbulb with 8 digit code

[polar birch]

8 digit code... you sure that's not a homekit device?

[still berry]

It was nowhere on the bulb or the quickguide but after looking further, yes it is
I forgot to enable ipv6 when changing my wifi, trying it again now

[still berry]

The more often I reinstalled OTBR the worse it got, now I also lost connection to my eve energy switch
the Nanoleaf app now has a grayed out home-assistant thread network and a different green network, but that only has a name and id
I have no idea where the home-assistant network is comming from, its not in the thread integration and I deleted the Nanoleaf app data to be sure it doesn't save anything between the tries

When trying to use the HA app to pair the eve switch it gets stuck on you need to connect to your wifi, while I am in my 2.4GHz wifi
maybe it also has a problem with the problematic thread networks and just gives a wrong error? idk