#the-water-cooler

1 messages Β· Page 567 of 1

clear ferry
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nothing happens when I click it

night zodiac
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hoy fuck, I didn't realize how small the wyze sense stuff is, haha

clear ferry
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wyze 🀒

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xiaomi PedoBearD

night zodiac
#

lol, this wyze stuff was $20

unreal orbit
#

@clear ferry update discord then. Or use a real computer

night zodiac
#

link me stuff to buy

clear ferry
#

xiaomi sensors are less than $10

night zodiac
#

this was 2 door, 1 motion, and the hub for $20

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I'll buy anything people say is good though

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especially if they're green

clear ferry
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h8 u h8 u wouldn't d8 u @unreal orbit 😦

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better disable @unreal orbit plex access on my server

night zodiac
#

rekt

unreal orbit
clear ferry
dull chasm
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☹️

clear ferry
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client info Stable 63513 (4ff819c)

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what are you sad about now @dull chasm ?

dull chasm
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😒

unreal orbit
#

A default emoji. You can use this emoji everywhere on Discord.

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πŸ™‚

dull chasm
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😰

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tyranny

clear ferry
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Try Anny ?

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Is she nice

night zodiac
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is she ok

scenic radish
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ANNIE, YOU OK?

clear ferry
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HEEEE-HEEE

fallen furnace
#

Just out of curiosity, has anyone made attempts to connect their garage to HA?

unreal orbit
#

yes

clear ferry
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Well, depends on your definition, I have so much stuff in my garage

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That a I have lot of connections from HA to my garage

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HA even runs in my garage

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oooof, ordering my 3d printer now

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with 2x filaments to start with monkaShake

unreal orbit
#

what color?

clear ferry
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black and purple PLA

unreal orbit
#

yikes

clear ferry
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WHAT HAVE I DONE NOW

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😦

clear ferry
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Black is neutral

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wife loves purple

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🀣

fallen furnace
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Sorry, meant to say the garage door

unreal orbit
#

I had some issues with the black filament that I ordered

fallen furnace
#

@clear ferry Wait till you see my pile of filament rolls

clear ferry
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I built my own garage door opener system @fallen furnace

fallen furnace
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Unfortunately I don't have a choice with changing the garage door opener due to us renting this place

clear ferry
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Ordering from the biggest 3dprinter shop in norway, that brand their own filament and state the quality is good @unreal orbit so hopefully good

fallen furnace
#

I wonder if there's a way with sending radio signal to trigger it like a garage door opener button

clear ferry
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not the motor itself, but the opening part

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that is what I have built

fallen furnace
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ooohhh okay, what did you use/built

unreal orbit
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@fallen furnace just get an extra wireless remote and solder a wifi relay to it

clear ferry
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I just did a protoboard + 230v->5v + wemos d1 mini + project box + esphome

unreal orbit
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esphome 🀒

clear ferry
scenic radish
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Black is neutral
@clear ferry neutrals are generally white

clear ferry
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not in norway 🀣

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blue is neutral and black is live

unreal orbit
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you're a monster

clear ferry
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oh my bad, brown is live

scenic radish
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Jk, I realize things are different outside the US

clear ferry
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no you don't!

unreal orbit
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If by different you mean wrong, then yes

clear ferry
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everything has to be murica

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🀣

austere minnow
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If by different you mean wrong, then yes
@unreal orbit no, working

scenic radish
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I think I have a problem...I want to buy a 4-pack of smart plugs with energy monitoring that I don't need because they can still be tuya-converted and it's fun to do that

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And I'm afraid eventually I won't be able to get stuff that can be tuya-converted in the future

unreal orbit
scenic radish
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I don't need them lol

scenic radish
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But maybe the fun alone will be worth $24?

unreal orbit
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Or you can spend the time actually learning to write python πŸ™‚

scenic radish
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Wut?

wet pilot
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burn

unreal orbit
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Grow your knowledge instead of doing things you're comfortable with πŸ™‚

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Or buy the plugs and send them to me

scenic radish
scenic radish
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I don't know why learning Python has to do with me enjoying tuya-converting cheap smart plugs lol

unreal orbit
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Just something else to spend the time on

scenic radish
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Good πŸ‘‰

unreal orbit
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I need to learn to python too so I can fix a couple integrations that have been giving me trouble πŸ˜“

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I get the basics, then I look at the code of an integration + the library for the integration and it's like

scenic radish
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I hardly even get the basics

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Much less the integration schema

flat needle
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I have unraid - which install approach should I be looking at? I could do a VM image, or some sort of docker setup. From what I gather, the homeassistant docker doesn't do any addons automatically?

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My current install is an ubuntu vm + the native linux approach w/ supervisor + HA running inside of dockers on that

scenic radish
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I write shitty tiny programs that work but are hacky at best lol

unreal orbit
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Everything in python feels hacky

scenic radish
flat needle
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Well, I know docker pretty well too - but is that general consideration correct - the HA docker doesn't do addons by itself? I'd have to setup nodered and similar myself?

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but VMs are just heavier weight generally

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Cool, I'll just VM it, I have server capacity to spare

scenic radish
unreal orbit
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"addons" are just docker containers that are handled by the supervisor. It's not difficult to run them yourself

scenic radish
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It's not difficult to learn the basics of docker

flat needle
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How hard is it to hook up a nodered <=> HA? That was handled pretty easily w/ the supervisor

unreal orbit
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Not difficult at all

flat needle
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maybe I'll give containers a try then. Just looked at addons I'm actually using and it's only node-red.

scenic radish
clear ferry
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I should learn something that isn't work related though, I learn 5+ new products at work every year

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Well... 3d printing isnt work related

flat needle
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Thanks - there wasn't a great place to ask the meta question of "which install approach". I'll go to container now to keep going

unreal orbit
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Well you're obviously just better than everyone 🀷

clear ferry
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I should learn python

scenic radish
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@flat needle you're good, just pointed you there since you sort of picked a method

clear ferry
unreal orbit
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Learn it and then fix my integrations for me GWaobloChildPepeHug

clear ferry
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Luudeus says I'm a developer already

scenic radish
flat needle
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I should learn to work on HA... doesn't seem too hard, although their internal APIs are pretty complex from the bit I've looked at. Or maybe just a complex data model

scenic radish
unreal orbit
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They do look complex. I can usually figure out what is going wrong, but starting something from the bottom up looks damn near impossible to me

clear ferry
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Same

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I can read most code

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But make something

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Oh lawd

clever mortar
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Perl.... perl is not a coding language

clear ferry
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Needs to seat 20

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Next

mild tapir
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Its the getting started part thats rough

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once you get going its easy

unreal orbit
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Yeah I'll be honest, setting up a proper dev environment is just something I CBA to do when I actually get time to do it

hoary wasp
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^Saw him in concert in February. At 70, the man's still got it

clear ferry
brazen fable
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So... there's a real Corona vaccine that got tested on 45 people. all 45 developed antibodies that successfully fended off the virus.

unreal orbit
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A cautiously optimistic πŸŽ‰

brazen fable
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Yeah. I'm right there with you

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American ingenuity strikes again!

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The producer is going to make an absolute killing

night zodiac
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new pi is running on SSD without SD card, neat

scenic radish
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Next step is to get off that pi πŸ˜›

night zodiac
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got my wyze sensors rollin' too

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I have servers and such but I like having hass

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io or whateve rit is

scenic radish
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Jk. I used a pi + SSD for a little over a year, it was fine. Good starting point

night zodiac
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the hass pi has data partition on SSD, yeah

scenic radish
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You can use the home assistant OS image in a VM

night zodiac
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yeah, I don't want to do that. lol

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I dockerize everything rather than vms and I like the docker management hass does so just want to leave it split from all my other docker stuff

scenic radish
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I gotcha. Wait...if you're already using docker why not do a home assistant container install 2Think

night zodiac
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I like it all split from everything

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just this one thang

scenic radish
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O I C

night zodiac
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my nas is running a few containers and then my lil' server is running a few but I didn't want hass on those devices

scenic radish
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You want the Appliance Experience ℒ️ with home assistant

night zodiac
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I actually only installed HASS because I had an extra Pi and it was just rollin' in 5 minutes

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with the image flashing and whatnot

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here I am 5 days later

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I have bought another pi

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just to mess with bt from python easily though

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not going to put a server on this one

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yet

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I just bought some more wyze sensors, they seem to work well enough

scenic radish
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Yeah I like mine

night zodiac
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cheap and good enough πŸ˜›

scenic radish
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Cheaper than the xiaomi ones, and I don't need to wait 30+ days for shipping lol

night zodiac
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I was shocked at how small the start kit c ame

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came*

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they need to update their instructions. it wasn't super clear to me that I had to run a scan event for every device

scenic radish
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Only downside is they use a proprietary frequency (and require the hub) but that wasn't a big deal for me

night zodiac
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I am going to sacrafice a motion sensor and see how long it can stay alive in my mail box

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or maybe a door sensor if it fits right but I think motion sensor might work best

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it isn't guarded by the weather very much

scenic radish
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You will have to call this service once at a time for each sensor you want to add.

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πŸ˜›

night zodiac
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yeah, but it isn't under install instructions, lol

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maybe

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or config, i mean

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oh, I should have read usage

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I guess

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ignore me

scenic radish
tidal bronze
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Wyze makes sensors now ?

scenic radish
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Where have you been quad

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They've had them for a while now lol

night zodiac
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cheap little things

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they are made to plug the hub into their cameras but someone made it work directly in the device

tidal bronze
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Lol. Got too many so never looked into new stuff. Interesting

scenic radish
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just messing with ya

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yeah, they're surprisingly nice for the price

tidal bronze
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Must check them out.

scenic radish
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i swear people who figure shit like that out are geniuses @night zodiac

night zodiac
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$20 for 4 contact sensors, $6 for a motion sensor

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$20 for the hub, 1 motion sensor, and 2 contacts

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tidal bronze
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How's the range ?

night zodiac
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I do not know, honestly :/

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my apartment is very tiny

scenic radish
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they don't really say, but they're 915MHz

tidal bronze
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Oh that's good great band to work in.

night zodiac
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Did y'all know the new Hue bulbs all broadcast a bluetooth signal now to where you don't need a hub?

scenic radish
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Sensor Bridge Range Recommend one Sensor Bridge per house

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UNHELPFUL

night zodiac
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weird how 2 of my bulbs out of like 18 have bluetooth

scenic radish
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they added a bluetooth radio to the new hardware revision for...some reason

tidal bronze
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So per house must work universally. Outstanding.

scenic radish
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lol

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well the good news is i'd imagine you could use multiple wyze bridges with wyzesense2mqtt if you needed more than one

tidal bronze
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I will order this weekend and test it out.

scenic radish
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these things are, no joke, super tiny

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🀏

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even the bridge is 🀏

turbid stirrup
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Cool. I wonder about the battery life though. Assuming you want to put your home automation in place for multiple years...

tidal bronze
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I have a few not so important places that could use motion.

turbid stirrup
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True. Trigger a notification on someone else's phone every time the cat had a shit ;)

scenic radish
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They claim 12 month battery life

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User replaceable, of course

tidal bronze
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Slowly moving all automations from PIR and frigate, got so many idle PIR sensors all over the place but as always better to have backups just in case. πŸ˜€

scenic radish
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Lol I remember you talking about your backup sensors before

tidal bronze
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Always, no choice when no UI is involved. πŸ˜‚

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Although outdoor 100% frigate and inside probably 60%. Need another coral to balance the load.

mild tapir
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Backup PIR Sensors?

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Holy hell

turbid stirrup
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@scenic radish well I'll be, actually user replaceable.

scenic radish
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Yeah, they'd be useless otherwise

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Unless they had 10+ year life like the strip contact sensors

tidal bronze
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@mild tapir yep since most ceiling ones are butt ugly and would not pass WAF.

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Only decent ceiling mount would be aeotec gen6 but then again an eyesore

turbid stirrup
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10 years sounds much better. I am very much a fan of preventing maintenance :)

tidal bronze
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Most industrial lorawan sensors are 8 to 10 years. Haven't seen much of them trickle down to home use.

hushed basalt
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Does anyone else actually like having a bit of bezel on their laptop screens

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Like I think it's a good thing, within reason

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Like the black frame on a projection screen, it has a real purpose

night zodiac
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no but I mistype on my phone all the time because there is no bezel

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well, before I resized the keyboard

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but I still close apps and shit with my fat palms

hushed basalt
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Like people keep shitting on surface laptops because of the bezel

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A projection screen border is far more than a mere decorative detail. The border serves a vital role in enhancing the projected image. A black border improves the human eye's ability to process the image by providing a necessary reference point. As a result, the border enhances contrast and makes the image appear brighter and more colorful.

tidal bronze
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How does this apply to all new bezel less TVs

fallen furnace
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Quick question @unreal orbit, which wireless remote did you get for the garage door opener?

unreal orbit
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I didn’t, but that’s what I would suggest if you need to mod a rental

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And it depends entirely on the opener

fallen furnace
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Ahh okay alright. Will have to take a look and see what can be done

hushed basalt
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Same principle @tidal bronze

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Maybe bias lighting helps though

tidal bronze
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Every device now is marketed with screen to body ratio. I doubt if this was an issue like projection days, we will have bezel-less screens left right and center.

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It's all about infinity displays. Would suck to have a border when you are trying to display static content on a wall

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I think you example is from sub 1000 lumen projector days.

hushed basalt
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You may be right

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But there's a lot of serious design compromises to make devices bezelless

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Laptops for example with ridiculous bottom cameras

tidal bronze
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If the display is 1000 nits I doubt you need any border. Even bias lighting is old school. Most new displays have multizone local dimming that adjusts to ambient lighting.

hushed basalt
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My tv is oled and has nearly no bezel and it does look nice

tidal bronze
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Yes it does.

hushed basalt
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My old tv was a 2006 samsung led and had bezels 2.5 inches thick

tidal bronze
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Lol.

hushed basalt
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But I wouldn't like a laptop bezelless

tidal bronze
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40 to 60 zone local dimming on new TVs buh bye bias lighting. 🀣

hushed basalt
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You need some border between the edge of your vscode terminal and the people walking around in the background in the cafe

tidal bronze
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LMAO

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I have to agree with you there.

hushed basalt
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Not as important if you're in an office against a wall but a border helps to literally frame your workspace

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A trade off for multiple monitors side by side though

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RIP anyone working in an open place office with bezelless monitors and no partitions at the back of their desk

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I will admit though that my surface laptop 15 is quite large to carry and operate

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In part from being 3:2 ratio and having some bezel

tidal bronze
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Love my SB2 waiting for SB3

hushed basalt
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But dell people can keep their 16:9 rubbish

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In retrospect I wish I got the 13" SL

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It's quite big for a machine with no gpu

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But then the workspace would be even smaller and my working memory is non existent

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If it's not on the screen I can't remember it. So swapping windows doesn't work well for me

tidal bronze
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I have the 15" 1TB with GPU. Love the PD to surface adapter paired with omnicharge goes on forever.

strong gulch
#

hello all

hushed basalt
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I have the surface dock 1, it's great

strong gulch
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how did you know my name was nick? xD

hushed basalt
#

Magnetic charging/dock cable would be hard to give up

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I just wish they put tb3 over that connector and let you use it on the dock

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eGPU would be really nice. I can't even use factorio on this thing

tidal bronze
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I use CUDA a lot so the gpu helps a lot.

strong gulch
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is anyone aware of open source modular and stackable housing projects?
like essential housing.

Myself and a couple architects are looking to work on a project like that, just wondering if we need to reinvent the wheel.

hushed basalt
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Housing is a hobby of mine

tidal bronze
#

You mean like macanum wheels ?

hushed basalt
#

Can you elaborate

strong gulch
#

me or quad?

tidal bronze
#

@strong gulch πŸ‘ˆ

hushed basalt
#

Correct

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What is essential housing

strong gulch
#

Affordable, and sustainable housing.
Not only for people, but also cities.

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I can pull up a design I saw awhile ago that we are basing our work off of

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So not tiny homes per se but pretty close.

forest edge
#

generation after z will be fine living out of a shoebox i'm sure

green inlet
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I would need my own module

tidal bronze
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@strong gulch what's the target market?

strong gulch
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yeah I think having single options and also a stackable one for apartment style buildings.

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We are still deciding if we want to pursue government grants (coming from Canada) and focus lower income and students. Or just a sustainable option for city dev projects.

green inlet
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Oh, I am a family, they would need living space and I would need my OWN module 🀣

strong gulch
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I have a plot of land, builders and investor set up to prototype

tidal bronze
#

From looks of it ready made for low income quick deployment

strong gulch
#

just need to build something that is sustainable and built for the future.

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so was wondering if there are OS projects out there or maybe anyone wants to help with a design

tidal bronze
#

So by default ground floor, no living spaces ?

forest edge
#

sustainable and built for the future = log cabins

tidal bronze
#

Everytime you see 4 walls and roof does not mean it's a log cabin. You gotta come out of the woods from time to time.

forest edge
#

just because your palm tree homes look like crap don't mean all log cabins do πŸ˜‹

green inlet
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Looks like a hotel to me

tidal bronze
#

Palm tree home huh. Ok then. πŸ™„

forest edge
#

what other options would you have? pretty sure the red trees are illegal to cut lol

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that be a pretty big cabin home too

tidal bronze
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LMAO

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How can anyone exisit without palm trees ?

forest edge
#

come to the midwest,"come off the sand" as you would say and you will see a whole new world

tidal bronze
#

So I walked right into it. Oh well.

forest edge
#

lol

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they are mandating people to wear masks while in the swimming pool lmao

tidal bronze
#

I gotta get off when "flying over" midwest. Only thing I do is look for places to eat on gmaps at 30k. They do pop up every 600 to 700 miles.

forest edge
#

funny thing is we been getting a lot of California's moving here to KC and they all love our airports and such

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not to mention this is BBQ country

tidal bronze
#

BBQ that's makes it worthwhile πŸ˜€

green inlet
#

Uhhh.....NO

forest edge
#

well.. don't think they do bbq kale..

green inlet
#

not like Carolina BBQ

tidal bronze
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I was going to ask. Gotta do check luggage on that one.

forest edge
#

you may wanna leave some of the cali yoga inspired items at home too, TSA may cavity search you otherwise

tidal bronze
#

So no tight short shorts ? What ?

forest edge
#

yea if you are wearing one of those body builder girdle things you may be asked to leave. just fyi

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noone wants to see your junk compressed

tidal bronze
#

@green inlet so what's on the grill today ?

green inlet
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Was chicken, roasted Brussel sprouts and broccoli

tidal bronze
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Roasted brussel πŸ˜‹

green inlet
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My kids love them

tidal bronze
#

But that plus broccoli, pretty sure you have air locks initiated.

green inlet
#

About every 5 minutes.....there is a release

tidal bronze
#

Been fasting today going to pull till breakfast tomorrow.

green inlet
#

Ouch. I have never done a 24 hour. I get hungry

tidal bronze
#

Loads of seltzer and spiked seltzerπŸ˜†

forest edge
#

quad cracker diet.. lose pounds fast..

scenic radish
#

latest or smelliest @green inlet ?

tidal bronze
#

Phew don't know that last time I had a biscuit

green inlet
#

Downtown KC was a cool place. The heat and gas district or something

scenic radish
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I just had Popeyes today after a long two-week hiatus

tidal bronze
#

Nice.

green inlet
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When you say smelliest you do mean like roses right.

tidal bronze
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Lol.

scenic radish
#

Your pharts smell like roses?

tidal bronze
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I think he meant the pets passing out type.

scenic radish
#

Ohhhhhh

green inlet
#

Yes

scenic radish
#

In that case

green inlet
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You can ask my wife, probably going to Dutch oven her in a few

scenic radish
#

That poor woman

forest edge
#

gross

tidal bronze
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Yikes.

scenic radish
green inlet
#

She is a lucky woman.

tidal bronze
#

Ah ha ha ha

tidal bronze
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It's all about perspective huh @green inlet

scenic radish
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Yeah, sometimes it looks big

green inlet
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I am Irish......it NEVER looks big 🀣

scenic radish
forest edge
#

wang chat

tidal bronze
#

When did lounge go BDC

scenic radish
forest edge
#

these 8 year old emoji's..

tidal bronze
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I guess @night zodiac went over GF limits yesterday.

forest edge
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don't even know wtf that means lol @scenic radish

scenic radish
night zodiac
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I am here, haha

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I am trying to figure out what I need to do to connect to my coffee cup πŸ˜›

scenic radish
#

IT'S NOT ALL DAY ANYMORE

night zodiac
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learning stuff

tidal bronze
#

Noooooo

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Don't do that

green inlet
#

Is that Ron Jeremy?

tidal bronze
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Lol

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He is 27 wouldn't have a clue about Ron.

green inlet
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No, Tediore’s gif

unreal orbit
#

Oh please, like Ron Jeremy wasn’t a legend even when we 90s babies were kids

tidal bronze
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@forest edge BTW all BBQ, non GMO right ?

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@unreal orbit 90's babies πŸ€”

hushed basalt
#

@rare condor I think I'll show you my DIY solar diverter project when I finish it

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Basically I have to give a talk on Homeassistant, so I'm making a simulated house with heating loads and simulated PV capacity,

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Then running simulations with the same amount of generated PV, then showing the diffferent with dumb controls and then automations to heat things with surplus energy

green inlet
#

@rare condor I think I'll show you my DIY solar diverter project when I finish it

That’s what she said

tidal bronze
#

That had to come from little more than grilled chicken and veggies

green inlet
#

The broccoli is intoxicating 🀣

unreal orbit
#

27 now == born in the 90s πŸ˜‰

green inlet
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Auh, to be 27 again

hushed basalt
#

It's like that dated playboy bunny skit in Family Guy

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Where Stewie is dancing with the bunnies and makes a reference

scenic radish
#

a reference

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I love references

hushed basalt
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and the presumably 18/19 year old bunny goes "I was born in 1987"

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Family guy is olllllddddd

scenic radish
hushed basalt
#

Is that show still running

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It's like the simpsons,

scenic radish
#

But worse

hushed basalt
#

Just keeps going but should have died a long time ago

scenic radish
#

I wish there were new Seinfeld episodes

hushed basalt
#

I've never seen Seinfeld

scenic radish
#

It's so good

hushed basalt
#

I had 2/3 tv channels when I grew up

scenic radish
#

Literally a show about nothing but it's great

hushed basalt
#

If it wasn't on those channels and you weren't there to watch it live, it didn't exist

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Stargate SG1 was my favourite show

green inlet
#

@hushed basalt , are you saying born in 87 is old?

hushed basalt
#

No, but a joke about how young playboy bunnies are being born in 1987 is an dated joke

last plaza
#

@scenic radish

Literally a show about nothing but it's great
You should watch Curb Your Enthusiasm. Another master piece!

unreal orbit
#

CYE is waaaaaaaay too cringe for me

green inlet
#

I grew up with Bugs Bunny, the flinstones, Jetsons, and the road runner 🀣

last plaza
#

really? I love that show

unreal orbit
#

It’s funny, but damn it’s so awkward

last plaza
#

thats the point

unreal orbit
#

I know, not my kind of humor most of the time

last plaza
#

man, the language can beharsh at times - unlike Seinfeld

green inlet
#

CYE is on what?

last plaza
#

HBO

scenic radish
#

Yeah i want to watch it but my fiancee hates Larry David lol

last plaza
#

It takes time to get used to LD for sure!

scenic radish
#

Alright I'm tired of saying "my fiancee" so for future reference, her name is Andy

hushed basalt
#

YO ADRIANNEEE

green inlet
#

Ha, I was just going to ask β€œwhen is the big day so you can stop calling her that”

hushed basalt
#

YHHUHH ADDRRYWHAANNEE

scenic radish
last plaza
#

Covid ruined many wedding plans this year

unreal orbit
#

Why does Andy hate Larry David?

last plaza
#

lmao

scenic radish
#

Dunno

#

I think she said he's arrogant lol

hushed basalt
#

Who is larry david

unreal orbit
#

Well he did help create one of the greatest sitcoms of all time

scenic radish
#

A guy

hushed basalt
#

I miss out on so much american references

scenic radish
#

In a thing

hushed basalt
#

Ah

#

I thought he was a lamp on a table

#

Phew

scenic radish
#

That's Darry Lavid

#

Easy to mix up

last plaza
scenic radish
#

Fuckin nailed it

unreal orbit
#

That gif actually made me lol

scenic radish
#

Bill Gates, the one true OG

last plaza
#

bill g!

unreal orbit
#

@hushed basalt watch Seinfeld and Friends and you will get most American references

scenic radish
#

@hushed basalt it's ok, the only Australian reference I probably know of is Steve Irwin ( 😒 )

unreal orbit
#

Oh cmon

scenic radish
#

@unreal orbit @hushed basalt

unreal orbit
#

You know crocodile Dundee

green inlet
#

And the c word

last plaza
#

not a big fan of Friends!

scenic radish
#

Same

green inlet
#

WHAT

#

you don’t like apple pie either?

#

Baseball?

scenic radish
#

Actually, no

green inlet
#

Lmao

unreal orbit
#

Baseball is super boring to watch tbchwy

green inlet
#

Yes, i concur....but it was a reference

scenic radish
#

"tbqhwy" is a new one for me

#

They just keep getting longer and longer

unreal orbit
#

Mobile πŸ˜•

scenic radish
unreal orbit
#

Though β€œquite” could also suffice I suppose

scenic radish
green inlet
#

Ohh, where did you get those?

scenic radish
#

Food 4 Less

#

Kroger brand

green inlet
#

We don’t have Kroger

unreal orbit
#

Not shopping at Aldi in 2020 smh

scenic radish
#

Used to

rare condor
#

@hushed basalt Does your diverter use a relay what are you diverting?

scenic radish
#

F4L is closer

green inlet
#

You like Aldi?

last plaza
#

we like kettle cooked chips...

#

we get from Meijers or Krogers

unreal orbit
#

I really like Aldi

#

As far as my like for grocery stores goes

last plaza
#

never been to Aldi.... we have one near by

scenic radish
#

I like Aldi

#

I used to go there Aldi time

last plaza
#

what's best there?

unreal orbit
#

There are several reasons I prefer it, but the main one is I spend half the money I would at Vons

green inlet
#

They are so hit and miss though

last plaza
#

we don't have vons here

unreal orbit
#

I think Vons is Kroger

scenic radish
#

But F4L has won me over. I've only had one store brand time that I didn't like

green inlet
#

Their red pepper is awesome

last plaza
#

ah! they operate under different names in different states

green inlet
#

Paqui chips though

unreal orbit
#

There’s a video on why Aldi is so cheap, it won me over. Locally sourced stuff as much as possible, displaying items in the container they were shipped in, sensible hours, stuff like that

hushed basalt
#

@rare condor it's all simulated since I'm a sad renter with no PV,

#

And I've overstimulated it for the demonstration

#

But I have 5 simulated loads, 3 controlled by automation and 2 that are simulated on/off through the day, washing machine and dryer

rare condor
#

Just curious what you mean as a diverter capable of regulating wattage is non trivial and pretty expensive to buy off the shelf

hushed basalt
#

Sorry 4 controlled loads

#

I'm just using input booleans with wattage attributes

scenic radish
#

@unreal orbit they also didn't accept credit cards for a long time so I wonder if that helped too

rare condor
#

Ah so on/off based on output

hushed basalt
#

To simulate the heaters being turned on and how that affects the generation, self consumption and import

scenic radish
#

WE NEED LOUNGE_2 SKALA

hushed basalt
#

Yeah super simple, I probably only have 10-15 minutes on that part of the presentation

unreal orbit
#

Oh really? That would be a deal breaker for me if they still didn’t

rare condor
#

Nice

scenic radish
#

Make HassBot doit

last plaza
#

go ahead πŸ™‚

green inlet
#

Yea, cause all this serious talk is harshing my buzz

last plaza
#

I sometimes feel we need lounge-2

#

so much tech talk, some times so much bull shit

hushed basalt
#

The simulation has a 5kw PV capacity, and I have 3 lists with 24 values each for days

green inlet
last plaza
#

I like that

hushed basalt
#

So I'll run through each list successively, 1 second is an hour

rare condor
#

I was working on a power regulated output using a triac to alter power fed into heater, so it's not full on and say 400w excess was generated instead of 1.2kw required by heater, it would feed in only 400w

hushed basalt
#

To demonstrate how smart automations can keep your house warm and your hot water hot while minimising inputs

#

And the room and hws temps will be simulated as well

rare condor
#

Who is this presentation for?

hushed basalt
#

I'll probbaly do +1 degree when on and -0.5 degree when off, per second

#

Local python meetup

rare condor
#

Neat very cool

hushed basalt
#

It's crazy how barely anyone takes advantage of their PV properly

#

And I'll keep track of import, exports during the simulation as well. And assign 30c to imports and 7c to exports

#

And then showing it in grafana

rare condor
#

There is a reason though, power output is fairly consistent on most days and most appliances you want on (which use a lot of power) are time dependant appliances (like heaters you want on after sunset). The main appliances, I have see benefit to automating are water heaters, towel rails and anything you can heat regardless of time. I tried heaters on a smart plug for a bit but often I just want it on around sunset as that's when the temp drops.

In a resi setting there isn't all that much that makes sense automating earlier

hushed basalt
#

I disagree, but you need good thermal mass and a tight insulated home,

#

which we don't have much of in Aus

scenic radish
hushed basalt
#

My ideal home would have insulated in slab hydronic heating, as well as reverse brick veneer,

rare condor
#

Yeah, I am basing it on a standard Aussie home which "breathes"

hushed basalt
#

slab and bricks really do carry a lot of thermal mass that can carry you over for days, even longer insulated

rare condor
#

i.e. where is live :/

hushed basalt
#

I'll just pretend the simulated house is proper πŸ˜‰

#

I could even show a fascimilie of better insulation by reducing the temp drop per hour

rare condor
#

The other thing is split systems are the most efficient or for that matter any heat pump, like don't like been shut on/off at random.

hushed basalt
#

Yeah in the real world I wouldn't shut them off hard,

#

I'd just set the thermostat higher when there's solar surplus

#

and lower when there's not etc

#

But I'm just simulating resistive heaters for this

rare condor
#

so my efficent home fb group has done this in the real world with real data monitored in grafana

scenic radish
hushed basalt
#

When I have a house we'll be doing it for real

rare condor
#

I would highly suggest you join that group

#

lots of energy enthusiasts

#

Building dream homes based on Energy Efficiency

hushed basalt
#

I'm already in it

#

You invited me πŸ˜‰

rare condor
#

πŸ‘

hushed basalt
#

Good thing I moved to the other lounge to let everyone talk here

rare condor
#

lol

#

I can't believe they thought Aussies were so insightful we deserved out own room. They are finally understanding 😁

scenic radish
#

@hushed basalt yeah this backfired lol

rare condor
#

can we delete this lounge and then rename lounge 2 to lounge 1

scenic radish
#

Lol...

rare condor
scenic radish
#

No you don't

rare condor
#

rude

night zodiac
#

I th ink tomorrow I will set up my old phone and try to use that for logging the bluetooth

scenic radish
#

@ancient anchor @thick dragon tbh I was a little disappointed by BL3

#

BL2 was my favorite and BL1 was also a lot of fun

ancient anchor
#

i had way more fun in coop than solo

scenic radish
#

Loved the general knoxx DLC in BL1

#

It's funny, I have exclusively played borderlands solo

#

Well, I've played with friends a few times but I've always enjoyed it more solo

ancient anchor
#

the wife and i have played a ton of bl2

#

but we didn't really go into TVHM or UVHM

#

we were up at 12a the night before our wedding to buy BL3

scenic radish
#

Oh man I have like 1000+ hours of play in BL2

#

I've brought Maya from level 1 to 72 like five times lol

#

The Moxxi DLC in BL3 is pretty good @thick dragon

ancient anchor
#

we almost postponed the honeymoon so we could play

#

lol

scenic radish
#

Lmaoooooo

#

WORTH

ashen kayak
#

thats a keeper

ancient anchor
#

yeah she's alright

scenic radish
#

Or, you know, go on the honeymoon and play borderlands between the monkaSFinger

ancient anchor
#

costa rica, barely any internet there lol

scenic radish
#

NO NEED FOR INTERNET WHEN YOU PLAY LOCALLY

ancient anchor
#

she didn't have a gaming PC until after we got back

scenic radish
#

O

#

I'm a console pleb CryMeCarson

ashen kayak
#

bout to build me a new pc, got 7 years out of this one and past time for an upgrade

scenic radish
#

I'd like to build a new desktop, but the 10-year-old laptop I'm using as a desktop is still working """"fine""""

ashen kayak
#

had to resort to installing steam on work laptop to run a jackbox game with friends tonight. Lol, huge no no

scenic radish
ashen kayak
#

perk of being our IT Director, turned off alerts in our RMM before I installed πŸ™‚

scenic radish
#

Lol

#

Love it

clear ferry
#

Lol companies that care what their employees do with their laptops

scenic radish
#

A B U S E O F P O W E R

ashen kayak
#

Most of the people in my company are idiots who fail phishing tests every week

clear ferry
#

Had a colleague in the us get called to HR for running steam on their laptop, I run so much out of range stuff.. but monitoring your employees is frowned upon in most civilized countries

scenic radish
#

@ashen kayak that sounds familiar

ancient anchor
#

i have bl3 installed on my work laptop

scenic radish
#

Lmao yesssss

ancient anchor
#

it helps to be the IT department

clear ferry
#

I had WOW installed from 2008-2015

ashen kayak
#

same, i got ding'd for wow years ago. I was on the road 80% of the time and played in the hotels at night

wet pilot
#

I have no games because lolmac

scenic radish
#

Ew

clear ferry
#

Lolmac

#

I actually only have one customer left that uses Mac's for employees

scenic radish
#

And you haven't killed them yet?

clear ferry
wet pilot
#

It dept is going full agro with locking things down so we can't get straight Linux

scenic radish
clear ferry
#

Us company it departments

#

🀒

scenic radish
#

Here we go again

#

US BAD NORWAT GOOD REEEEEEEEEEEE

clear ferry
#

I'm not even joking when I say Norwegians companies just give most employees administrator accounts

wet pilot
#

They tried to take local admin away from the developers. They lost that fight

clear ferry
#

I'm not joking KermitWait

scenic radish
#

Are u joking

clear ferry
#

I am not brΓΆther

ashen kayak
#

Who is gonna target a Norwegian company for a cyber attack?

clear ferry
#

A lot have @ashen kayak

ancient anchor
#

my work laptop with bl3 is a mac

ashen kayak
#

i know, just kidding

ancient anchor
#

lol

clear ferry
scenic radish
#

I got drunk and ate the rest of my beef jerky

#

Dammit

ashen kayak
#

we do some DoD work so we have to legally lock most people down, audits are fun

clear ferry
#

I just have separate computers at each military customer, problem solved

scenic radish
clear ferry
#

Noice

#

I want

#

Please brΓΆther

rare condor
#

Whats the password for the DOD server plz

scenic radish
#

FEED ME

#

|| hunter2 ||

rare condor
#

also Silo 10-24 plz

wet pilot
#

Hunter2

ashen kayak
#

go for the Zapp's vodoo chips

scenic radish
#

Go for deez nuts

wet pilot
#

Need that capital letter

rare condor
#

/ Fire Missile Norway confirm.

#

hmmm didn't work

ashen kayak
#

DoD password is password

clear ferry
#

Thought it was pASSword

rare condor
#

lol make it so obvious no one would ever guess

rare condor
#

next level reverse psychology

clear ferry
#

My default password complexity for testing has evolved with windows server

#

password - Password - Password123 - Password123!

wet pilot
#

It requires password rotation but does not allow for token auth

#

Solution, stupid password for my laptop (not domain joined) and some complex randomly generated thing in a password manager for vpn and sso

ashen kayak
wet pilot
#

Luckily they didn't shut off the apple biometrics

rare condor
#

haha well I have 2FA πŸ˜›

clear ferry
#

I do most 32 char random passwords per site

ashen kayak
#

damn MFA

clear ferry
#

Plus 2fa

rare condor
clear ferry
#

Australia 🀒

wet pilot
#

Need one of those dino heads on a stick

rare condor
#

I can pick the spiders like an arcade claw game that way πŸ˜„

hushed basalt
#

Bought a roborock H6

#

It will be nice to have a stick vacuum

turbid stirrup
#

Skateboarding into a mosh pit on a cruise pit... these folks have some imagination! XKCD?

#

lmao, recognized the XKCD style before even seeing the link.

mild tapir
#

Am I doing Windows correctly?

hushed basalt
#

@mild tapir the only way to win is to not play

rare condor
#

I have yet to be arrested for driving my escooter

#

I know its unpopular opinion but I love escooter, use it more than driving

hushed basalt
#

I agree they should be allowed

#

Anything to stop people driving

rare condor
#

I did some hardware mods it goes 45 km hour now

hushed basalt
#

Stand on a freeway overpass at 8am and just look at the hoard of single occupant cars going to the cbd

clear ferry
#

I have never owned a vehicle other than a car

rare condor
#

indeed

clear ferry
#

At one point I owned 4 tbh KermitWait

hushed basalt
#

Let's say 0.5 million cars a day commute in Perth

rare condor
#

Man you really don't like the environment πŸ˜›

hushed basalt
#

Average 20km each way, 40km a day

#

That's 20 million km a day

rare condor
#

yeah, Aus pollutes excessively for our population size

hushed basalt
#

At least 30% of those people are working from a desk

clear ferry
#

Environment 🀒

hushed basalt
#

Well Norways economy is based on exporting fossil fuels, so :D

clear ferry
#

We also have like 98% clean power and the biggest environmental enticing for consumers

rare condor
#

I will admit things that I know are wrong but I do it anyway, 1. I don't wear a helmet, 2. I use my scootter to get 300m back home from station after a night out

clear ferry
#

Heck $100k off the biggest tesla

#

And the egolf is almost half of a regular golf

rare condor
#

yeah, pretty solid

#

I like that we can import cars which are electric without import duties

#

Seen some cool Japanese Electric Kei cars under $12k

#

But only 80-100km range, 90km top speeed

clear ferry
#

The egolf is $25k ISH new and gives you 250km range

#

The new id3 is out soon, think it will be similarly priced and give you 450 range

#

If memory serves right

rare condor
#

25 USD?

clear ferry
#

Notice the k

rare condor
#

Yes but USD or aud

clever mortar
#

Well, it'd be $250K AUD surely πŸ€”

rare condor
#

Lol

clever mortar
#

(Remembering the complaints all my Aus/Kiwi friends have about the inflated costs)

rare condor
#

In 2012 1AUD=1.18USD

clear ferry
#

In 99% of cases where people state $ they mean USD, if I talk about AUD I say AUD

rare condor
#

Now less so 😭

#

I was talking AUD so 12k = around $25USD

hushed basalt
#

If my wife ends up car commuting when we move

#

An electric little hatchback would be great

#

But i don't think they would ever win out financially in Aus

#

Electric cars you pretty much have to buy new here

#

Vs a 2 year old ICE

rare condor
#

Buy a Swift hybrid import or a Mitsubishi Leaf or Mitsubishi Minicab EV all under $20k AUD

hushed basalt
#

Hmmm

rare condor
#

Japan imports becoming big market due to SEVS changes

#

You can import them without massive tax duties

hushed basalt
#

Next vehicle will probably be a minivan though

#

No warranty recourse for imports though right?

#

Prime shipping

rare condor
#

Most importers give warranty, but also its an ev with not many moving parts

#

Gets some basics done make sure battery is healthy and your good, plus very unique

hushed basalt
#

Is this used market

#

What's the ev as house battery situation like in Australia

#

Although probably wouldn't be as useful for commuters

#

More WFH or retirees

clear ferry
#

I should do more wfh

#

And replace my US colleagues

#

That should retire

hushed basalt
#

Take on two roles at once

#

Double the salary

clear ferry
#

The average age of the guys I trained with in the US was probably 59

hushed basalt
#

Or 1 norwegian salary and 1 American salary

#

So 1.1 salaries

clear ferry
#

BUT TAX

hushed basalt
#

Just become a dual citizen

#

Or employ yourself as an subcontractor of your own offshore tax haven strategically structured corporation

clear ferry
#

Then I have voting rights, nothing good will come of that

hushed basalt
#

Pepe for president

forest edge
#

Lounge_3_Lounge_harder_than_ever_before

hearty depot
#

Canadians around?
the little brother of my wife is going to work there for the next half year near Whitehorse.
aware of a good mobile provider for this cind of period?

forest edge
#

Moose Mobile?

#

Canuck Broadband?

hearty depot
midnight adder
#

There website looks bad

#

Looks like they are a MVNO. Optus is the carrier.

clear ferry
#

I actually haven't encountered any Canadians here

#

Except rohan

midnight adder
#

Number 3 on the right.

rare condor
#

I use Moose they are decent

last plaza
#

Norien is from Canada. He is in Jedi group

rare condor
#

Anyone know what I should look for in a painter, getting whole house painted this week.

clear ferry
#

Canoodians

sick summit
#

hey guys, i have a totally not HA related question, but idk where or whom to ask to. I got a nodeMCU and a 12v relay (with an external 12v PSU) and I grounded both nodemcu and the relay, and fed them power accordingly, but the relay wont click or blink the led that way. If i feed it 3.3v and ground it with the nodemcu, and remove the PSU entirelly and power the nodeMCU via usb, the led will blink correctly on the relay, but obviously no clicking, as 3.3v is not enough to trigger the coil

scenic radish
rare condor
sick summit
#

ohh thx, will move it there right away

last plaza
#

Why do we still have lounge 2?

#

We should have more ephemeral channels... channels that only last for few hours.

rare condor
#

lounge 3 has been heavily requested

scenic radish
#

accidentally deletes the real lounge
fuck

rare condor
#

I'm gravely disappointed I am going to use wink from now on! 😑😑😑😑😑😑

unreal orbit
#

I have ants in my office 😣

#

there goes any potential for productivity today

scenic radish
#

What is this, an office for ants?

unreal orbit
#

Apparently ☹️

hushed basalt
unreal orbit
#

spraying them with 99% iso seems to be working

rare condor
#

no one here is going to understand that ref badtelco πŸ˜›

hushed basalt
#

That's the point :D

clever mortar
#

Don't forget to set fire to the ants... for added confidence in their eradication

scenic radish
#

I'm about to order 4 Ikea Zigbee smart plugs for...delivery. Feels weird to not go in to Ikea

hushed basalt
#

Must be nice to be able to buy ikea smart plugs

#

As an Australian I feel personally attacked

unreal orbit
#

I miss going to ikea 😦

scenic radish
#

Anyone want to buy some tplink smart plugs lol

hushed basalt
#

Ew

#

You should plug in all your smart plugs in series

scenic radish
#

They work fine but I'd like to improve my Zigbee mesh

#

And reduce wifi clients

hushed basalt
#

Make a rubegoldburg machine out of smart plugs

scenic radish
#

Lmao

hushed basalt
#

Are smart plugs turing complete

scenic radish
#

Wouldn't be the first time I made a home assistant Rube Goldberg machine

#

These Ikea smart plugs look Y U G E

#

C H O N K

rare condor
#

Xiaomi Aqara ftw they are tiny.

#

And very accurate energy monitoring

scenic radish
#

Can't seem to find a US version

rare condor
#

😦

scenic radish
#

Xiaomi Mijia Smart WiFi Socket - Zigbee Version

clever mortar
scenic radish
rare condor
#

yeah that looks bigger than aus one but should be smaller than ikea?

scenic radish
#

Ooooo

rare condor
#

Also I keep dying :/

#

This game is hard

scenic radish
#

Still can't find the US version on Ali or GearBest CryMeCarson

#

And they're $23 on Amazon so...no

midnight adder
#

@scenic radish You do not want to know how much knx stuff is

rare condor
#

try CBUS

#

Or try CBUS with RS485 intregation plus energy monitoring ($3000 per plug)

#

It was popular before wifi stuff took off

scenic radish
#

Wow, shipping from Ikea is only $5

midnight adder
#

Dont buy ikea

rare condor
#

they dont pay tax in australia

#

Ikea: $11m tax paid on $1bn of revenue

hearty depot
#

they dont pay tax in austria too
actually nowhere

rare condor
#

I think they should pay tax

unreal orbit
#

Corporations avoiding taxes? :shocked_pikachu:

rare condor
#

Sorry if this is too political

hearty depot
unreal orbit
#

Man, all these companies asking you to input your birthdate for age verification really aren't doing any favors to the devs in the future that have to account for time travelers

hearty depot
#

I waited for that like.. 3 weeks

rare condor
#

896 cores hmmm....

#

but also thats funny as

scenic radish
#

i haven't looked at ikea's financial statements, but corporations pay taxes on net income, not gross revenue (at least in the US), so gross revenue to taxes paid isn't necessarily a fair comparison

#

if you have 10MM in revenue and 9MM in expenses, your net income is 1MM, so you'd pay tax on the 1MM, not the 10MM

rare condor
#

IKEA's profit figures would likely be much higher if not for the millions the company is required to pay in fees to its parent entity, along with further millions labelled only as "other expenses". The company's gross profit for 2019 totalled $525 million.

#

tax should still me higher

dusky plank
scenic radish
clear ferry
#

I have a purple too I'm going to install when I get home from vacation

unreal orbit
#

You use micro SD cards @clear ferry ? raised_eye

clever mortar
#

For toast

scenic radish
#

I'm using a micro SD card as part of my backup solution for my home assistant config and /etc

clear ferry
#

Just because@clever mortar told me to

#

I trust him

#

His life is on the line

scenic radish
scenic radish
#

Six feet pls

#

It makes me uncomfortable seeing people in TV shows not standing six feet apart even though they were recorded before all this lol

unreal orbit
#

Stop bullying me into getting nitro 😦

scenic radish
clear ferry
#

@unreal orbit duit

scenic radish
#

HE DID IT

#

THE ABSOLUTE MADMAN

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VILLHELLM YOU BEAUTIFUL BASTARD

unreal orbit
scenic radish
unreal orbit
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Now I need to find all these secret emote servers

scenic radish
unreal orbit
clear ferry
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Brb invite@unreal orbit to all my servers

unreal orbit
scenic radish
tidal bronze
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I thought they are still planning to open schools for little ones. πŸ€”

clear ferry
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Is Teddi going back to school?

tidal bronze
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@clear ferry BTW wife likes that cheese. So didn't go to waste.

clear ferry
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Happy wife, happy life

tidal bronze
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Gotta order some more now.

clear ferry
tidal bronze
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Any other recommendations on Amazon?

scenic radish
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Ordered four tradfri smart plugs gachiHYPER1

tidal bronze
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From where ? I need a few

scenic radish
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Ikea's website

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$5 shipping

tidal bronze
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Delivery was August

scenic radish
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Yup

unreal orbit
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"Any recommendations on Amazon" "ikea" ThonkEyes

scenic radish
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Something like that might ship faster though

tidal bronze
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Ask for cheese Tedi comes up with plugs. Yep back to school

scenic radish
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I thought "from where? I need a few" was in response to me talking about the plugs

tidal bronze
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Messing with you.

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Need to expand on zigbee coverage.

scenic radish
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Samesies

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About to unload 4 tplink smart plugs

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Well, I might keep one

unreal orbit
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I still have 1 tplink plug in use. The others I keep around for odd jobs that won't require longevity

tidal bronze
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TP link is good just to put things in pairing mode. 😜

unreal orbit
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the 1 that's in use is in a light fixture, so it will take a fair amount of BS to get my lazy ass to change it

scenic radish
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I kind of want to sell at least three of them to offset this purchase

unreal orbit
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it's gonna cost you more to ship them than they are worth

tidal bronze
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If it's old @forest edge will take it.

scenic radish
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Though, $45 for four Zigbee plugs is pretty good

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@unreal orbit in person on letgo

last plaza
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TP Link is not worth single ply TP.

scenic radish
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Or to family maybe

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"pls buy my shitty smart plugs"

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Jk they're honestly fine

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I just want more zigbee

last plaza
#

But... they are better than wemo outlets.

scenic radish
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Weblow

tidal bronze
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@scenic radish you can pickup the plugs in AZ lol

last plaza
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I have more TP link Kasa than the wemos. Probably good. Returned all my ikea crap.

unreal orbit
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I've had a few minor issues with tp link, but overall they are pretty solid

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been running all but one of my light switches for 2 years now

scenic radish
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Yeah, just trying to improve my Zigbee mesh and reduce wifi clients

last plaza
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Not a bad idea if you want to go that route.

tidal bronze
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@scenic radish what's the network score ?

scenic radish
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The WiFi Experience ℒ️?

tidal bronze
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Yep

scenic radish
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95%

bitter pawn
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yawn

tidal bronze
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As long as you are above 95 you can load it up.

scenic radish
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I wish they'd actually explain how that number is calculated

clear ferry
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Americans probably won't like it because it doesn't have puke enzyme in it

scenic radish
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$15

unreal orbit
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gin PepePuke

tidal bronze
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@clear ferry not available

scenic radish
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Hershey's is gross @clear ferry

clear ferry
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I agree @scenic radish

scenic radish
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Not sure why we like it

clear ferry
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It tastes like stale barf

scenic radish
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Andy likes it 🀒

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Almost grounds for calling off the marriage

clear ferry
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Divorce!

tidal bronze
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@scenic radish latency, retries and association failure over time.

scenic radish
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O I C

last plaza
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We went to Hershey’s factory in Pennsylvania last year, and stopped eating Hershey’s since then.

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It’s no Charlie and chocolate factory

unreal orbit
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Seeing the sausage get made didn't sit well?

last plaza
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Yup πŸ˜‚

clear ferry
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Everyone loved the Norwegian chocolate I sent for Christmas

scenic radish
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Real good

clear ferry
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Even @dull chasm who wasn't supposed to eat it

last plaza
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I never got it 😒

clear ferry
clear ferry
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Noice

scenic radish
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$28??? Damn

clear ferry
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They are all good

tidal bronze
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Cool

clear ferry
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But overpriced

tidal bronze
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Just to test

scenic radish
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Just to see how it feels

unreal orbit
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It's imported from an exotic land, of course it's expensive

scenic radish
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NORWAT #1

clear ferry
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Namba wan

scenic radish
unreal orbit
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Wow, don't even invite me to the nut button server. I see how it is

tidal bronze
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@clear ferry links to get those cloud berry stuff?

scenic radish
unreal orbit
clear ferry
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@tidal bronze noone sells it on Amazon it seems

tidal bronze
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Only see Swedish preserves

hearty depot
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you meight know a cheapish VPS provider for 1-2 weeks?
all the big ones would like my soul for eternely

clever mortar
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Depends on what you're after, but you can spin up a host on AWS, Google, etc, for minutes if that's all you want

clear ferry
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And aws can be used for free with small enough systems