#epic-battles | Terraria | Page 183

gleaming groveBOT Mar 30, 2026, 2:30 AM

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Let the battle begin!

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The fighting has begun to die down...

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The fighting has stopped!

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There are 11 players remaining.
@carmine cairn, @heady wasp, @dire night, @fiery belfry, @maiden walrus, @turbid swan, @exotic saddle, @rose jewel, @teal badge, @arctic temple, and @idle pike
Send me a private message to register for the final battle.
We will continue the battle in 2-4 minutes.

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The fighting begins again!

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@heady wasp drank an Obsidian Skin Potion, and dove into lava for a nice warm swim. Wait... upon further inspection, that was a Calming Potion. @heady wasp died.

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@maiden walrus fired their bow at @dire night, but a bird flew in the way. They tried again, but this time a bunny jumped in the way. They tried one last time, but the Moon Lord got in the way. @maiden walrus gave up.

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@maiden walrus was gunned down by a beagle piloting a flying doghouse. @maiden walrus died.

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@teal badge attempted to use a Rod of Discord, but failed because deep in their heart, they didn't believe that it would work.

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@turbid swan ate a Bomb Fish and got an extreme case of explosive diarrhea. @turbid swan died.

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@exotic saddle started a petition to add "oof" to the official dictionary.

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@exotic saddle was shot in the heart by an arrow, but instead of falling over dead, they fell in love with a nearby Werewolf, which basically amounts to the same thing. @exotic saddle died.

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@rose jewel wrote a science fiction novel, and vaguely used the term "quantum mechanics" to describe the parts that they didn't actually understand.

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@idle pike distracted the Moon Lord by asking it the philosophical question of whether its Eyes of Cthulhu are "True" or not, allowing everyone to flee to safety.

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@fiery belfry and @rose jewel swung at each other furiously with swords, but nothing happened because they forgot to turn PvP on.

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@teal badge became the victim of identity theft and was forced to clear themselves of all the evil deeds that were done in their name.

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@rose jewel was struck by a falling star. Such incredible luck! @rose jewel died.

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@idle pike saw a bunch of identically-dressed bald men wearing green, all of whom were chopping down the same yew tree.

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@teal badge fell asleep while listening to the Merchant's boring stories, and was swiftly butchered by @carmine cairn. @teal badge died.

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@arctic temple was running low on health while fighting the Moon Lord, but they were barely able to teleport to the Nurse's house on time. Except the Nurse was actually the Arms Dealer dressed up in the Nurse's clothes. April Fools! @arctic temple died.

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@idle pike brought a Bubble Wand to a tavern, and was beaten senseless by every able-bodied patron in the bar. @idle pike died.

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@dire night put on so many winter coats, the heat and pressure transformed them into a diamond. @dire night died.

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@carmine cairn ate a weird dog treat and gained such immense power that just 10% of it was enough to vaporize @fiery belfry before they could say "Zoinks!" @fiery belfry died.

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The battle is over!

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The Winner is @carmine cairn!

Prize Time!

1000 points go to 1st place: @carmine cairn
500 points go to 2nd place: @fiery belfry
250 points go to 3rd place: @dire night
150 points go to 4th place: @idle pike
150 points go to 5th place: @arctic temple
150 points go to 6th place: @teal badge
100 points go to 7th place: @rose jewel
100 points go to 8th place: @exotic saddle
100 points go to 9th place: @turbid swan
100 points go to 10th place: @maiden walrus

Thanks for Playing Everyone!

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Registration is open!
Type bb!register to join the next battle!
The battle will start at the next 30 minute mark (e.g. 1:30, 2:30, 3:30).

dire night Mar 30, 2026, 2:38 AM

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bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 30, 2026, 2:38 AM

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@dire night, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

turbid swan Mar 30, 2026, 2:38 AM

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bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 30, 2026, 2:38 AM

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@turbid swan, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

arctic temple Mar 30, 2026, 2:38 AM

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bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 30, 2026, 2:38 AM

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@arctic temple, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

maiden walrus Mar 30, 2026, 2:42 AM

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bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 30, 2026, 2:42 AM

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@maiden walrus, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

exotic saddle Mar 30, 2026, 2:46 AM

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bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 30, 2026, 2:46 AM

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@exotic saddle, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

teal badge Mar 30, 2026, 2:51 AM

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bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 30, 2026, 2:51 AM

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@teal badge, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

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@livid shuttle, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

heady wasp Mar 30, 2026, 3:07 AM

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bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 30, 2026, 3:07 AM

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@heady wasp, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

carmine cairn Mar 30, 2026, 3:20 AM

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bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 30, 2026, 3:20 AM

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@carmine cairn, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

fiery belfry Mar 30, 2026, 3:27 AM

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bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 30, 2026, 3:27 AM

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@fiery belfry, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

flat shale Mar 30, 2026, 3:27 AM

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bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 30, 2026, 3:27 AM

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@flat shale, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

long vine Mar 30, 2026, 3:29 AM

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bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 30, 2026, 3:29 AM

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@long vine, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

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Registration will be closing in about 30 seconds.

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Registration is now closed!

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Let the battle begin!

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The fighting has begun to die down...

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The fighting has stopped!

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There are 12 players remaining.
@carmine cairn, @flat shale, @heady wasp, @dire night, @fiery belfry, @long vine, @maiden walrus, @turbid swan, @exotic saddle, @teal badge, @livid shuttle, and @arctic temple
Send me a private message to register for the final battle.
We will continue the battle in 2-4 minutes.

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The fighting begins again!

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@exotic saddle had work to do, but apparently they thought that flying circles around Skeletron was a better use of their time.

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@flat shale summoned the Golem at a Lihzahrd Altar, but didn't jump out of the way quickly enough and got flattened. @flat shale died.

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The Wizard showed @dire night their future in his Crystal Ball. "Every flower blooms in its own sweet time. Lucky numbers: 9, 25, 31, 42, 68."

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@livid shuttle was checking the books in their bookcase and found they were all blank.

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@arctic temple found a Mystic Frog, but it was killed by a Jungle Slime before they could reach it.

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@turbid swan wasn't taking any chances, and descended their hellevator without letting go of their Umbrella. On the way down, they grew a majestic beard.

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@long vine found an incantation for a spell that would supposedly erase people's memories. Strangely, it was written in their own handwriting, even though they had never seen it before.

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@heady wasp swung their Fetid Baghnakhs uncontrollably and disemboweled themselves. @heady wasp died.

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@fiery belfry tried to smash a watermelon with a stick while blindfolded, but missed and ended up smashing @dire night's head instead. @dire night died.

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@arctic temple created a bold and brash masterpiece of a painting. Sadly, no one seemed to recognize @arctic temple's artistic genius.

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@maiden walrus had a terrible night. @maiden walrus died.

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@fiery belfry watched a cool show about pixelated people battling each other.

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@turbid swan wanted to be a superstar. The gods of Terraria granted their wish and @turbid swan turned into a Fallen Star, only to immediately go poof because it was daytime. @turbid swan died.

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@long vine chased @exotic saddle with a portable toilet, and eventually caught up to them and flushed them down. @exotic saddle died.

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@teal badge joined the Old One's Army, in the only way a human could: as a skeleton. @teal badge died.

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@livid shuttle heard that you shouldn't dig straight down, so they dug straight up instead. They were met face to face with Silt. @livid shuttle died.

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@arctic temple stopped a meteor from crushing @fiery belfry and @long vine with their own body. @arctic temple died.

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@fiery belfry went to the ocean with plans of a beach day, but out of nowhere a tornado appeared and flung a shark directly at their face. @fiery belfry died.

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@carmine cairn searched frantically for a toilet, and finally found one after holding it in for more than an hour. Sweet relief! Then they woke up from their dream. Oh...

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@carmine cairn began working on a skate park with Portal Gun stations. It'll be great once it's done.

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@long vine got their first pair of wings! Which were also their last pair after they crashed into a brick wall. @long vine died.

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The battle is over!

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The Winner is @carmine cairn!

Prize Time!

1000 points go to 1st place: @carmine cairn
500 points go to 2nd place: @long vine
250 points go to 3rd place: @fiery belfry
150 points go to 4th place: @arctic temple
150 points go to 5th place: @livid shuttle
150 points go to 6th place: @teal badge
100 points go to 7th place: @exotic saddle
100 points go to 8th place: @turbid swan
100 points go to 9th place: @maiden walrus
100 points go to 10th place: @dire night

Thanks for Playing Everyone!

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Registration is open!
Type bb!register to join the next battle!
The battle will start at the next 30 minute mark (e.g. 1:30, 2:30, 3:30).

long vine Mar 30, 2026, 3:37 AM

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bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 30, 2026, 3:37 AM

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@long vine, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

flat shale Mar 30, 2026, 3:39 AM

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bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 30, 2026, 3:39 AM

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@flat shale, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

exotic saddle Mar 30, 2026, 3:41 AM

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bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 30, 2026, 3:41 AM

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@exotic saddle, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

maiden walrus Mar 30, 2026, 3:45 AM

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bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 30, 2026, 3:45 AM

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@maiden walrus, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

proud lava Mar 30, 2026, 3:51 AM

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bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 30, 2026, 3:51 AM

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@proud lava, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

slender quarry Mar 30, 2026, 3:54 AM

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bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 30, 2026, 3:54 AM

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@slender quarry, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

turbid swan Mar 30, 2026, 3:56 AM

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bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 30, 2026, 3:56 AM

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@turbid swan, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

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@livid shuttle, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

serene garden Mar 30, 2026, 4:10 AM

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bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 30, 2026, 4:10 AM

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@serene garden, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

fiery belfry Mar 30, 2026, 4:24 AM

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bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 30, 2026, 4:24 AM

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@fiery belfry, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

carmine cairn Mar 30, 2026, 4:25 AM

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bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 30, 2026, 4:25 AM

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@carmine cairn, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

desert python Mar 30, 2026, 4:29 AM

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bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 30, 2026, 4:29 AM

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@desert python, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

astral glacier Mar 30, 2026, 4:29 AM

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bb!register

hexed notch Mar 30, 2026, 4:29 AM

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bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 30, 2026, 4:29 AM

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@astral glacier, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

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@hexed notch, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

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Registration will be closing in about 30 seconds.

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Registration is now closed!

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Let the battle begin!

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The fighting has begun to die down...

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The fighting has stopped!

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There are 14 players remaining.
@carmine cairn, @slender quarry, @flat shale, @hexed notch, @fiery belfry, @desert python, @long vine, @maiden walrus, @turbid swan, @proud lava, @exotic saddle, @astral glacier, @livid shuttle, and @serene garden
Send me a private message to register for the final battle.
We will continue the battle in 2-4 minutes.

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The fighting begins again!

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@slender quarry was stalking @exotic saddle's Instagram account, and accidentally liked an old picture. @slender quarry died.

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The Wizard looked into his Crystal Ball and prophesied that @desert python would soon die a gruesome death. @desert python ignored him, since they had already heard that from him like 15 times that day.

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@livid shuttle gave @flat shale Turtle armor and Flesh Knuckles, and summoned the Moon Lord. @flat shale died.

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@astral glacier smashed three Shadow Orbs for loot and skedaddled out of there with a Recall Potion.

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@long vine pulled the pin on a grenade, and forgot about it until a few seconds later. @long vine died.

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@maiden walrus summoned a Goblin Invasion, thinking that their Legendary Cactus Sword would save them from death. Apparently, those legends were greatly exaggerated. @maiden walrus died.

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@turbid swan stormed Area 51, but it was mostly empty, save for a handful of people who had also learned of the event through Internet Explorer.

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@turbid swan angered the gods, so they re-enabled gravity for @turbid swan's floating house. @turbid swan died.

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@hexed notch tried to open a casino, but it was burned down by @proud lava and @exotic saddle, who did not approve of gambling.

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@fiery belfry tried to talk to the Witch Doctor but both of them just sat awkwardly for 10 minutes.

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@proud lava skipped their Duolingo lesson, and was caught by the owl. @proud lava died.

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The moon hit @exotic saddle's eye like a big pizza pie. @exotic saddle died.

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@astral glacier, @serene garden, and @livid shuttle raced each other to loot a pyramid. However, the chest only contained a Pharaoh's set. No one was pleased by this.

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@serene garden found a way to ride a Wyvern! They had a fun time, until the Wyvern tried passing through blocks. @serene garden died.

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@fiery belfry tried very hard to summon the ultimate boss: the Moon Lord's legs. Maybe they'll succeed someday.

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@livid shuttle beat @hexed notch into a pulp with a stale baguette. @hexed notch died.

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@desert python tried to answer Terraria trivia questions, but didn't know any of the answers, so they just responded to every question with "Terraria".

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Rumors started spreading that @astral glacier was so lazy that the world would collapse if they ever took action. No official response was received from @astral glacier.

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@fiery belfry found a way to manually remove debuffs. They accomplished this by jumping off a cliff. @fiery belfry died.

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@desert python took a nap on a patch of Chlorophyte, and became one with the jungle. @desert python died.

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@livid shuttle tried going up, up, down, down, left, right, left, and right, hoping that something cool would happen. They stepped on a pressure plate and got caught in a fiery explosion, which I guess was pretty cool. @livid shuttle died.

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@astral glacier promised @carmine cairn that their hellevator had water at the bottom. @carmine cairn died.

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The battle is over!

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The Winner is @astral glacier!

Prize Time!

1000 points go to 1st place: @astral glacier
500 points go to 2nd place: @carmine cairn
250 points go to 3rd place: @livid shuttle
150 points go to 4th place: @desert python
150 points go to 5th place: @fiery belfry
150 points go to 6th place: @hexed notch
100 points go to 7th place: @serene garden
100 points go to 8th place: @exotic saddle
100 points go to 9th place: @proud lava
100 points go to 10th place: @turbid swan

Thanks for Playing Everyone!

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Registration is open!
Type bb!register to join the next battle!
The battle will start at the next 30 minute mark (e.g. 1:30, 2:30, 3:30).

astral glacier Mar 30, 2026, 4:48 AM

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bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 30, 2026, 4:48 AM

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@astral glacier, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

maiden walrus Mar 30, 2026, 4:55 AM

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bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 30, 2026, 4:55 AM

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@maiden walrus, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

mossy jolt Mar 30, 2026, 5:02 AM

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bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 30, 2026, 5:02 AM

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@mossy jolt, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

waxen marlin Mar 30, 2026, 5:07 AM

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bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 30, 2026, 5:07 AM

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@waxen marlin, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

potent talon Mar 30, 2026, 5:09 AM

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🅱️🅱️!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 30, 2026, 5:09 AM

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@potent talon, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

gray sky Mar 30, 2026, 5:17 AM

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bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 30, 2026, 5:17 AM

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@gray sky, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

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@livid shuttle, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

small sphinx Mar 30, 2026, 5:23 AM

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bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 30, 2026, 5:23 AM

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@small sphinx, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

carmine cairn Mar 30, 2026, 5:28 AM

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bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 30, 2026, 5:28 AM

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@carmine cairn, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

long vine Mar 30, 2026, 5:29 AM

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bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 30, 2026, 5:29 AM

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@long vine, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

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Registration will be closing in about 30 seconds.

brave shore Mar 30, 2026, 5:30 AM

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bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 30, 2026, 5:30 AM

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@brave shore, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

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Registration is now closed!

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Let the battle begin!

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The fighting has begun to die down...

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The fighting has stopped!

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There are 11 players remaining.
@carmine cairn, @long vine, @maiden walrus, @small sphinx, @astral glacier, @potent talon, @gray sky, @waxen marlin, @livid shuttle, @mossy jolt, and @brave shore
Send me a private message to register for the final battle.
We will continue the battle in 2-4 minutes.

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The fighting begins again!

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@long vine traveled back in time and flapped their Butterfly Wings. Upon returning to the present day, they found out that their wing flap triggered a cascade of events that ended with a tornado killing @maiden walrus. @maiden walrus died.

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@waxen marlin started chopping trees down to make a house for the Cyborg, hoping that he would sell them some high-grade explosives without asking for a permit.

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@small sphinx was carried away by an army of Cheerios and thrown into a milk volcano. @small sphinx died.

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@livid shuttle sought out wisdom from the trivia master, who just said "lmap".

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@astral glacier complained to @brave shore that they didn't get any pickles on the burger that they ordered.

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@potent talon splashed around in a puddle and giggled while @mossy jolt observed disapprovingly.

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@brave shore was arrested for killing @potent talon with a Megashark because they didn't own a gun license, and got punished with a moderate fine. @potent talon died.

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@waxen marlin made a skyscraper by building a one-room house and covering it with bone meal.

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@astral glacier tried to start a greenhouse, but all the plants kept dying. @astral glacier decided that the best course of action was to go outside and turn @gray sky into fertilizer. @gray sky died.

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@mossy jolt decided to count the total number of blocks in their world. Good luck!

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@waxen marlin literally can't even. @waxen marlin died.

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@livid shuttle overclocked a Spear Trap, creating a surprisingly good mining tool.

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@mossy jolt aimed a spinning toy at @astral glacier, and let it rip! It bounced off their foot harmlessly.

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@long vine drew a green stick figure and labelled it a picture of the Dryad. It was then praised globally as a masterpiece, winning competitions and becoming cemented in history as the greatest piece of art to be made.

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@mossy jolt tried to tame a pack of wolves by feeding them with bones. Unfortunately, the wolves didn't want bones; they wanted meat. @mossy jolt died.

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@brave shore kept screaming for ice cream and wouldn't stop! Eventually @livid shuttle had had enough, so they scooped @brave shore to death with an ice cream spoon. @brave shore died.

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@carmine cairn sprinted out of the supermarket after buying Donuts, Donut Holes, and Glue.

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@astral glacier wondered what would happen if they threw a Guide Voodoo Doll into lava on the surface. Guide died. Oh.

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@astral glacier became so famous that people started writing fanfictions about them. Out of curiosity, they read one and immediately died of embarrassment. @astral glacier died.

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@livid shuttle accidentally killed a Voodoo Demon above lava before they were finished with their hellbridge. @livid shuttle died.

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@carmine cairn built a Time Machine to see what the Terraria Discord Server would look like in 5 years. It turned out all that remained was #general-chat.

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@long vine pranked @carmine cairn by giving them a piece of hair and telling them that they could eat it to gain superpowers.

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@long vine was eaten by a tree. @long vine died.

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The battle is over!

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The Winner is @carmine cairn!

Prize Time!

1000 points go to 1st place: @carmine cairn
500 points go to 2nd place: @long vine
250 points go to 3rd place: @livid shuttle
150 points go to 4th place: @astral glacier
150 points go to 5th place: @brave shore
150 points go to 6th place: @mossy jolt
100 points go to 7th place: @waxen marlin
100 points go to 8th place: @gray sky
100 points go to 9th place: @potent talon
100 points go to 10th place: @small sphinx

Thanks for Playing Everyone!

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Registration is open!
Type bb!register to join the next battle!
The battle will start at the next 30 minute mark (e.g. 1:30, 2:30, 3:30).

strong sierra Mar 30, 2026, 5:37 AM

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bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 30, 2026, 5:37 AM

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@strong sierra, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

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@livid shuttle, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

long vine Mar 30, 2026, 6:03 AM

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bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 30, 2026, 6:03 AM

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@long vine, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

hardy patio Mar 30, 2026, 6:05 AM

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bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 30, 2026, 6:05 AM

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@hardy patio, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

small sphinx Mar 30, 2026, 6:06 AM

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bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 30, 2026, 6:06 AM

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@small sphinx, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

amber ermine Mar 30, 2026, 6:09 AM

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bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 30, 2026, 6:09 AM

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@amber ermine, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

potent talon Mar 30, 2026, 6:12 AM

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🅱️🅱️!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 30, 2026, 6:12 AM

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@potent talon, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

fringe shuttle Mar 30, 2026, 6:19 AM

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bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 30, 2026, 6:19 AM

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@fringe shuttle, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

fiery belfry Mar 30, 2026, 6:27 AM

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bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 30, 2026, 6:27 AM

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@fiery belfry, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

astral glacier Mar 30, 2026, 6:28 AM

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bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 30, 2026, 6:28 AM

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@astral glacier, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

waxen marlin Mar 30, 2026, 6:29 AM

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bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 30, 2026, 6:29 AM

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@waxen marlin, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

soft lark Mar 30, 2026, 6:29 AM

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bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 30, 2026, 6:29 AM

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@soft lark, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

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Registration will be closing in about 30 seconds.

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Registration is now closed!

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Let the battle begin!

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The fighting has begun to die down...

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The fighting has stopped!

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There are 12 players remaining.
@soft lark, @fiery belfry, @long vine, @amber ermine, @small sphinx, @fringe shuttle, @astral glacier, @hardy patio, @potent talon, @waxen marlin, @livid shuttle, and @strong sierra
Send me a private message to register for the final battle.
We will continue the battle in 2-4 minutes.

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The fighting begins again!

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@amber ermine handed @long vine a folded piece of paper that read "BOO", which frightened them so badly that they got a heart attack. @long vine died.

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@astral glacier, @strong sierra and @amber ermine played hot potato with a grenade. @amber ermine forgot to pass it on. @amber ermine died.

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@small sphinx fought a Medusa but ended up in her collection of statues. @small sphinx died.

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There once was a @fringe shuttle who swallowed a fly. They swallowed a spider to catch the fly. They swallowed a bird to catch the spider. They swallowed a cat to catch the bird. They swallowed... oh. It looks like the cat scratched @fringe shuttle's insides, and all the animals were freed. @fringe shuttle died.

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@fiery belfry's weapons were getting dirty, so they decided to wash them in the dishwasher. Their Fiery Greatsword was nice and clean, but their The Bee's Knees's string broke, and their Frost Staff cracked into too many pieces to count.

#

@livid shuttle tried to instigate drama against @potent talon, but their words couldn't get through their thick skin. @livid shuttle used a few Luminite Bullets instead. @potent talon died.

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@hardy patio cartwheeled off the Nurse's hospital roof and landed on their head. Good thing they were wearing a Lucky Horseshoe!

#

@waxen marlin hadn't seen @soft lark in a long time, and missed them. @soft lark aimed a Sniper Rifle at @waxen marlin from a nearby tree, and didn't miss them. @waxen marlin died.

#

@fiery belfry was greviously injured in battle, but they were saved by modern medicine! Except someone messed up, and they ended up with three arms and one leg.

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@strong sierra’s experiments in baking went awry: eldritch gods were awoken, the world’s economy collapsed, and elderly matriarchs were enslaved in service of the cookie.

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@livid shuttle made fun of @hardy patio for playing weird instruments like the kazoo and harmonica. Then @hardy patio shut them up by killing them with a musical saw. @livid shuttle died.

#

@fiery belfry started trying to popularize the phrase "Yaaas queen". In the meantime, a faint buzzing noise was heard from someplace far away.

#

@astral glacier was trapped in a box with a tiny amount of radioactive material and a Geiger counter connected to a vial of poison. After the box was opened, it was revealed that @astral glacier lived.

#

@soft lark, @strong sierra, and @hardy patio made a temporary truce. None of them sounded very sincere about it.

#

@strong sierra wanted to get a Vilethorn, but forgot that they had already broken two Shadow Orbs. @strong sierra died.

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@hardy patio patiently farmed Chaos Elementals for the Rod of Discord. One of them didn't seem to be dying from the lava, but it was just @fiery belfry in disguise.

#

@soft lark accidentally seasoned their Escargot with daffodil bulbs instead of garlic. @soft lark died.

#

Thanks to @fiery belfry's quick reflexes, they were able to pull out their Cell Phone right before a fatal swing from @hardy patio's Meowmere! Oh, wait, they forgot to charge it. @fiery belfry died.

#

@astral glacier started making lame jokes and spreading them over the internet for fake internet points.

#

@astral glacier went to the bottom of the ocean and equipped an Inner Tube. If the excessive G-force didn't kill them, the vacuum of space certainly did. @astral glacier died.

#

The battle is over!

#

The Winner is @hardy patio!

Prize Time!

1000 points go to 1st place: @hardy patio
500 points go to 2nd place: @astral glacier
250 points go to 3rd place: @fiery belfry
150 points go to 4th place: @soft lark
150 points go to 5th place: @strong sierra
150 points go to 6th place: @livid shuttle
100 points go to 7th place: @waxen marlin
100 points go to 8th place: @potent talon
100 points go to 9th place: @fringe shuttle
100 points go to 10th place: @small sphinx

Thanks for Playing Everyone!

#

Registration is open!
Type bb!register to join the next battle!
The battle will start at the next 30 minute mark (e.g. 1:30, 2:30, 3:30).

hardy patio Mar 30, 2026, 6:45 AM

#

bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 30, 2026, 6:45 AM

#

@hardy patio, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

#

@livid shuttle, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

small sphinx Mar 30, 2026, 6:51 AM

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bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 30, 2026, 6:51 AM

#

@small sphinx, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

fringe shuttle Mar 30, 2026, 6:56 AM

#

bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 30, 2026, 6:56 AM

#

@fringe shuttle, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

strong sierra Mar 30, 2026, 7:09 AM

#

bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 30, 2026, 7:09 AM

#

@strong sierra, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

proper wedge Mar 30, 2026, 7:26 AM

#

bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 30, 2026, 7:26 AM

#

@proper wedge, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

astral glacier Mar 30, 2026, 7:29 AM

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bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 30, 2026, 7:29 AM

#

@astral glacier, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

#

Registration will be closing in about 30 seconds.

#

There are not enough players! A minimum of 10 players are needed to start the battle. We will keep registration open for another hour and then try again.

amber ermine Mar 30, 2026, 7:35 AM

#

bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 30, 2026, 7:35 AM

#

@amber ermine, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

storm latch Mar 30, 2026, 7:43 AM

#

bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 30, 2026, 7:43 AM

#

@storm latch, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

mossy jolt Mar 30, 2026, 7:45 AM

#

bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 30, 2026, 7:45 AM

#

@mossy jolt, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

gray sky Mar 30, 2026, 7:51 AM

#

bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 30, 2026, 7:51 AM

#

@gray sky, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

uneven grove Mar 30, 2026, 8:03 AM

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bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 30, 2026, 8:03 AM

#

@uneven grove, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

hazy oracle Mar 30, 2026, 8:18 AM

#

bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 30, 2026, 8:18 AM

#

@hazy oracle, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

long vine Mar 30, 2026, 8:19 AM

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bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 30, 2026, 8:19 AM

#

@long vine, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

turbid skiff Mar 30, 2026, 8:26 AM

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bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 30, 2026, 8:26 AM

#

@turbid skiff, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

#

Registration will be closing in about 30 seconds.

fiery belfry Mar 30, 2026, 8:30 AM

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bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 30, 2026, 8:30 AM

#

@fiery belfry, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

#

Registration is now closed!

#

Let the battle begin!

#

The fighting has begun to die down...

#

The fighting has stopped!

#

There are 16 players remaining.
@fiery belfry, @long vine, @proper wedge, @amber ermine, @small sphinx, @fringe shuttle, @storm latch, @astral glacier, @hardy patio, @turbid skiff, @gray sky, @livid shuttle, @mossy jolt, @strong sierra, @uneven grove, and @hazy oracle
Send me a private message to register for the final battle.
We will continue the battle in 2-4 minutes.

#

The fighting begins again!

#

@amber ermine flew to the skies, stored some clouds in an empty bottle, and went underground to hide it somewhere.

#

@proper wedge began screaming, thinking it would increase their power level. It did not.

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@strong sierra found a strange weapon called a Person Staff, and used it to summon @storm latch, @fiery belfry, and @long vine. Then their Summoning Potion buff expired. @long vine died.

#

@proper wedge took out a family photo and started talking about how they couldn't wait to get home. This was an obvious death flag. @proper wedge died.

#

After exploring in darkness for some time, @amber ermine found a strange, gear-shaped artifact. But as soon as they lifted it off its pedestal, the flow of time stopped and @amber ermine was trapped for all eternity. @amber ermine died.

#

@livid shuttle insisted that Menacing prefixes were better. @small sphinx insisted that Lucky prefixes were better. Unfortunately for @small sphinx, critical hits do not apply in PvP. @small sphinx died.

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@turbid skiff started to build cheap, ugly houses for NPCs, but @fringe shuttle forced them to put in some more effort.

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@hazy oracle watched with curiosity as an odd-looking green device hovered up close, turned red, and flew up and out of sight.

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@hardy patio won a staring contest against the Eye of Cthulhu, but only because it was 4:30 A.M.

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@fringe shuttle started to draw comparisons between Epic Battles and The Hunger Games. Fortunately, the Epic Battle Dryad Bot killed them off before they could be sued for copyright. @fringe shuttle died.

#

@storm latch tripped over their shoelace and fell into the sky. @storm latch died.

#

The Headless Horseman wanted to experience the feeling of having a head, so they borrowed @astral glacier's. @astral glacier died.

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@hardy patio saved the world from a meteor by commanding their Stardust Dragon to destroy it.

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@turbid skiff hid from a swarm of zombies by digging an underground bunker, and was tormented all night by the sound of bodies hitting the floor.

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@gray sky challenged the Golem to a fistfight, neglecting to consider that Golem's fists are more than twice their size. @gray sky died.

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@strong sierra took the term "farming" too literally, and tried watering @hazy oracle's Rod of Discord.

#

@uneven grove literally gaslighted @livid shuttle by dousing them with flammable gas and lighting them on fire. @livid shuttle died.

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Pirates are approaching from the west! @turbid skiff wondered why they never came from the north, though.

#

@hardy patio threw @mossy jolt into lava to try to summon the Wall of Flesh. This made @hardy patio a terrible person, but not terrible enough, apparently. @mossy jolt died.

#

@strong sierra told @uneven grove to step off their carpet, which they did. @strong sierra proceeded to murder @uneven grove, now that their carpet was safe from blood stains. @uneven grove died.

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@hardy patio consulted the hive mind to ask what gear they should use against the Wall of Flesh. The hive mind recommended using bee weapons with the Hive Pack, because of course it would.

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@turbid skiff planted glowing mushrooms in order to make a home for the Truffle.

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@hazy oracle wished for the ability to fly. @strong sierra granted their wish by turning them into a Hardcore ghost. @hazy oracle died.

#

@strong sierra became convinced that they could fly, and tested this by leaping off a cliff. They were wrong. @strong sierra died.

#

@fiery belfry was supposed to die in this scene, but they didn't, because the program that was supposed to kill them had a missing semicolon.

#

@turbid skiff and @hardy patio had a petty dispute, in which they stole each other's cake and planted thorny bushes in front of each other's houses.

#

@fiery belfry realized that their Companion Cube was actually just a square.

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@hardy patio started checking for hidden cameras. They found one, and another, and another, another. Panic set into @hardy patio - were they living in a dystopian reality where they were always being watched? @hardy patio then checked the date, and their worst fears were confirmed. The year was 1984.

#

The Wall of Flesh told @turbid skiff that there was something stuck in their teeth. @turbid skiff checked their reflection in their Magic Mirror just to make sure. @turbid skiff died.

#

@hardy patio painted a nice picture of Skeletron. Skeletron was so flattered, he gave them early access to the Dungeon in exchange for the painting.

#

@fiery belfry tried to create a sandbox game which was entirely composed of circles. After a lot of fails, they went back to "square one."

#

@hardy patio found a Strange Brew and decided that it was too strange to drink.

#

@fiery belfry was forced to work for a raccoon in order to pay off their housing debts.

#

@hardy patio got literally swamped with enemies during a solar eclipse. @hardy patio died.

#

The battle is over!

#

The Winner is @fiery belfry!

Prize Time!

1000 points go to 1st place: @fiery belfry
500 points go to 2nd place: @hardy patio
250 points go to 3rd place: @turbid skiff
150 points go to 4th place: @strong sierra
150 points go to 5th place: @hazy oracle
150 points go to 6th place: @uneven grove
100 points go to 7th place: @mossy jolt
100 points go to 8th place: @livid shuttle
100 points go to 9th place: @gray sky
100 points go to 10th place: @astral glacier

Thanks for Playing Everyone!

#

Registration is open!
Type bb!register to join the next battle!
The battle will start at the next 30 minute mark (e.g. 1:30, 2:30, 3:30).

strong sierra Mar 30, 2026, 8:39 AM

#

bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 30, 2026, 8:39 AM

#

@strong sierra, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

uneven grove Mar 30, 2026, 8:39 AM

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bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 30, 2026, 8:39 AM

#

@uneven grove, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

tranquil wyvern Mar 30, 2026, 8:42 AM

#

bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 30, 2026, 8:42 AM

#

@tranquil wyvern, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

waxen marlin Mar 30, 2026, 8:43 AM

#

bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 30, 2026, 8:43 AM

#

@waxen marlin, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

amber ermine Mar 30, 2026, 8:54 AM

#

bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 30, 2026, 8:54 AM

#

@amber ermine, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

#

@livid shuttle, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

pastel timber Mar 30, 2026, 8:55 AM

#

bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 30, 2026, 8:55 AM

#

@pastel timber, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

gray sky Mar 30, 2026, 9:15 AM

#

bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 30, 2026, 9:15 AM

#

@gray sky, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

mossy jolt Mar 30, 2026, 9:23 AM

#

bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 30, 2026, 9:23 AM

#

@mossy jolt, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

hexed notch Mar 30, 2026, 9:28 AM

#

bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 30, 2026, 9:28 AM

#

@hexed notch, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

storm latch Mar 30, 2026, 9:28 AM

#

bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 30, 2026, 9:28 AM

#

@storm latch, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

proper wedge Mar 30, 2026, 9:29 AM

#

bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 30, 2026, 9:29 AM

#

@proper wedge, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

#

Registration will be closing in about 30 seconds.

fiery belfry Mar 30, 2026, 9:30 AM

#

bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 30, 2026, 9:30 AM

#

@fiery belfry, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

#

Registration is now closed!

#

Let the battle begin!

#

The fighting has begun to die down...

#

The fighting has stopped!

#

There are 13 players remaining.
@hexed notch, @fiery belfry, @proper wedge, @tranquil wyvern, @amber ermine, @pastel timber, @storm latch, @gray sky, @waxen marlin, @livid shuttle, @mossy jolt, @strong sierra, and @uneven grove
Send me a private message to register for the final battle.
We will continue the battle in 2-4 minutes.

#

The fighting begins again!

#

@uneven grove looked over the Arms Dealer's impressive selection of firearms, and purchased a Minishark.

#

@amber ermine called @fiery belfry on their Cell Phone for backup while fighting the Wall of Flesh. This was obviously a terrible idea, but they were too Horrified to realize it. @amber ermine died.

#

@waxen marlin swapped @gray sky's Obsidian Skin Potion with a Builder Potion. @gray sky then proceeded to go swimming in lava after drinking a Builder Potion. @gray sky died.

#

@waxen marlin used physics to argue that it would be better not to bounce after a fall. @pastel timber tested this theory on @waxen marlin, who bounced, and ended up being right. @waxen marlin died.

#

@proper wedge headed off to pick some Daybloom for their potions, but @strong sierra had already harvested them all and didn't replant any. How rude...

#

@storm latch found a city of ruined houses in the underworld, partially submerged in lava. They wondered how many Tax Collectors used to live here.

#

@livid shuttle dug a hole in the ground, covered it in dirt blocks, and called it a "base".

#

@tranquil wyvern accidentally pressed "Send" before they were finished typing their message, whi

#

@proper wedge and @livid shuttle were turned into stone statues by Medusa. Don't worry, they got better eventually.

#

@uneven grove wrestled a shark, and easily won because it was an arm wrestling match.

#

@livid shuttle walked into a pool of lava, but forgot to equip their Lava Charm. Fortunately for them, they pressed "B" and consumed an Obsidian Skin Potion, as well as a few other buffs. Unfortunately, when they went to fight the Wall of Flesh, they died due to their lack of buffs. @livid shuttle died.

#

@mossy jolt went mining for iron, but only found some worthless diamonds.

#

The Nurse told @mossy jolt they had hippopotomonstrosesquipedaliophobia. Upon hearing that, @mossy jolt died.

#

@strong sierra accelerated on a minecart so fast that they managed to travel back in time. Then they spoiled the ending to a TV series that @storm latch was watching. @strong sierra died.

#

@hexed notch stepped into a mysterious portal and was transported into a strange alternate dimension where everyone spelled "color" in a different way.

#

@pastel timber sharpened @tranquil wyvern's face at a Sharpening Station. @tranquil wyvern became the sharpest tool in the shed. @tranquil wyvern died.

#

@uneven grove poked a voodoo doll out of pure boredom. Shortly afterwards, they heard a completely unrelated scream in the distance.

#

@fiery belfry released all their built-up stress by letting out a primal scream. Everyone nearby stared strangely at @fiery belfry, but it was very satisfying.

#

@storm latch was taken by surprise by a zombie while walking outside, but the zombie simply ignored them and kept walking while moaning "Braaaains".

#

@pastel timber found a pair of Water Walking Boots. You could make a religion out of this!

#

@storm latch tried to sleep, but all of the NPCs were throwing a party.

#

@fiery belfry accidentally burned their prayer book while tossing their homework into their fireplace. The Terraria gods don't like homework either, so @fiery belfry was forgiven.

#

@proper wedge was digging a hellevator with a Copper Pickaxe, but got blocked by some obsidian. Instead of digging around the obsidian, they just gave up and headed home.

#

@uneven grove transformed into a Werewolf, but forgot to take off their Silver armor first. @uneven grove died.

#

@hexed notch started writing a last will, so if they die, they could at least count on someone to delete their Deviantart account.

#

@pastel timber cast their spell wrong, accidentally turning themselves into a powerful vampire. The stakes have never been higher! In fact, a couple stakes came flying through the sky and straight into @pastel timber's heart! @pastel timber died.

#

@hexed notch thought that they bought a Minishark from the Arms Dealer. They had actually bought a live shark from the Angler, which proceeded to eat every limb of their body. @hexed notch died.

#

@fiery belfry made a strange, colorful bomb by stacking rows of fireworks on top of each other, and against all odds, successfully deployed it on @storm latch. @storm latch died.

#

@proper wedge started wondering what happens to people after they die. They couldn't sleep at night anymore.

#

@fiery belfry finally crafted a Cell Phone! Unfortunately, they had no friends to call, so all they received were spam calls.

#

The Tavernkeep decided to hire the Nurse as a barmaid. However, she was so busy healing @proper wedge over and over that the Tavernkeep fired her for not doing her job.

#

@fiery belfry flexed so hard on @proper wedge that they squeezed them to death with pure muscle. @proper wedge died.

#

The battle is over!

#

The Winner is @fiery belfry!

Prize Time!

1000 points go to 1st place: @fiery belfry
500 points go to 2nd place: @proper wedge
250 points go to 3rd place: @storm latch
150 points go to 4th place: @hexed notch
150 points go to 5th place: @pastel timber
150 points go to 6th place: @uneven grove
100 points go to 7th place: @tranquil wyvern
100 points go to 8th place: @strong sierra
100 points go to 9th place: @mossy jolt
100 points go to 10th place: @livid shuttle

Thanks for Playing Everyone!

#

Registration is open!
Type bb!register to join the next battle!
The battle will start at the next 30 minute mark (e.g. 1:30, 2:30, 3:30).

#

@uneven grove, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

#

@livid shuttle, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

#

@pastel timber, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

storm latch Mar 30, 2026, 9:40 AM

#

bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 30, 2026, 9:40 AM

#

@storm latch, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

tranquil wyvern Mar 30, 2026, 9:55 AM

#

bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 30, 2026, 9:55 AM

#

@tranquil wyvern, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

jolly swift Mar 30, 2026, 10:13 AM

#

bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 30, 2026, 10:13 AM

#

@jolly swift, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

fiery belfry Mar 30, 2026, 10:22 AM

#

bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 30, 2026, 10:22 AM

#

@fiery belfry, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

empty ocean Mar 30, 2026, 10:28 AM

#

bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 30, 2026, 10:28 AM

#

@empty ocean, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

hexed notch Mar 30, 2026, 10:29 AM

#

bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 30, 2026, 10:29 AM

#

@hexed notch, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

#

Registration will be closing in about 30 seconds.

amber ermine Mar 30, 2026, 10:30 AM

#

bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 30, 2026, 10:30 AM

#

@amber ermine, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

#

Registration is now closed!

#

Let the battle begin!

#

The fighting has begun to die down...

#

The fighting has stopped!

#

There are 10 players remaining.
@empty ocean, @jolly swift, @hexed notch, @fiery belfry, @tranquil wyvern, @amber ermine, @pastel timber, @storm latch, @livid shuttle, and @uneven grove
Send me a private message to register for the final battle.
We will continue the battle in 2-4 minutes.

#

The fighting begins again!

#

@empty ocean was smited by the Epic Battle Dryad Bot after breaking the fourth wall too many times. @empty ocean died.

#

@amber ermine used a Rod of Discord too many times and ended up in an alternate dimension. One where oxygen didn't exist. @amber ermine died.

#

@jolly swift tried using necromancy to revive some of the dead players, but only managed to summon half a zombie.

#

@uneven grove fell into lava and quickly got out, crafting a crafting table then a cauldron. They placed the cauldron down, filled it with a bucket of water, and safely landed in it.

#

@livid shuttle went mining hoping to find diamonds, but was only able to find some kind of glowing plant material.

#

@fiery belfry tried to prove that the world was a sphere, and not a pancake in space. The world is actually a 2D box, but @fiery belfry didn't know that.

#

@pastel timber was frozen in carbonite and displayed as a trophy in rich person's house. Eventually, they were accidentally knocked over and shattered into dozens of pieces. @pastel timber died.

#

@hexed notch appeared to be taking a group picture of @jolly swift, @uneven grove, and @fiery belfry. @hexed notch's selfie turned out great!

#

@storm latch started screaming that the sky was falling! As it turns out, the sky actually was falling, and it fell directly on their head. @storm latch died.

#

@tranquil wyvern came across a piece of quartz deep in a cave, and upon bringing it close to their ear, they heard whispers of ancient terraria knowledge emanating from within.

#

@uneven grove challenged the Brain of Cthulhu to a trivia battle and lost. @uneven grove died.

#

@tranquil wyvern searched the Dungeon for books to read, but couldn't find anything written by someone other than H.P. Lovecraft.

#

@jolly swift crafted the Grand Design and started stealing all the wiring they could find.

#

@livid shuttle suddenly realized how old they were and had a heart attack. @livid shuttle died.

#

While exploring a swamp, @fiery belfry caught a glimpse of the elusive "Swamp Man", who was peacefully walking around catching lizards.

#

@fiery belfry found a free Copper Shortsword on the ground. It had a bit of slime on it. How did it get here?

#

@hexed notch messed up while trying to type "/i terra blade 1 legendary" and ended up with terrible chronic pain in one leg. Also, they became allergic to dairy.

#

@jolly swift got tired of always staring to the east or west, and decided to turn and face south. Then they saw a beast staring back! Was this Cthulhu? Had it finally returned to kill everyone? Doesn't Cthulhu have tentacles?

#

@tranquil wyvern tried farming for a Slime Staff by placing a Slime Statue near a naturally generated trap and jumping on the pressure plate over and over.

#

@tranquil wyvern found a duplication glitch, and used it to save the planet by planting 20 million trees. Good for them!

#

@fiery belfry consulted all known laws of aviation and determined that there was no way that Demon Eyes should be able to fly.

#

@jolly swift flossed their teeth. Afterwards, they didn't want to waste the floss, so they used it to decapitate @hexed notch. @hexed notch died.

#

@fiery belfry broke the server rules and was squashed under a giant hammer. @fiery belfry died.

#

The sun burnt @jolly swift into a crisp. They somehow didn't die, but now they have to live out the rest of their life as a crisp.

#

@jolly swift greedily picked up gold nuggets off the ground, one after another, and then got swallowed by a shadowy monster with a white mask. @jolly swift died.

#

The battle is over!

#

The Winner is @tranquil wyvern!

Prize Time!

1000 points go to 1st place: @tranquil wyvern
500 points go to 2nd place: @jolly swift
250 points go to 3rd place: @fiery belfry
150 points go to 4th place: @hexed notch
150 points go to 5th place: @livid shuttle
150 points go to 6th place: @uneven grove
100 points go to 7th place: @storm latch
100 points go to 8th place: @pastel timber
100 points go to 9th place: @amber ermine
100 points go to 10th place: @empty ocean

Thanks for Playing Everyone!

#

Registration is open!
Type bb!register to join the next battle!
The battle will start at the next 30 minute mark (e.g. 1:30, 2:30, 3:30).

empty ocean Mar 30, 2026, 10:39 AM

#

bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 30, 2026, 10:39 AM

#

@empty ocean, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

long vine Mar 30, 2026, 10:44 AM

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bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 30, 2026, 10:44 AM

#

@long vine, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

jolly swift Mar 30, 2026, 10:45 AM

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bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 30, 2026, 10:45 AM

#

@jolly swift, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

mossy jolt Mar 30, 2026, 10:45 AM

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bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 30, 2026, 10:45 AM

#

@mossy jolt, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

rose jewel Mar 30, 2026, 10:47 AM

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bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 30, 2026, 10:47 AM

#

@rose jewel, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

raw moss Mar 30, 2026, 11:00 AM

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bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 30, 2026, 11:00 AM

#

@raw moss, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

#

@livid shuttle, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

soft lark Mar 30, 2026, 11:13 AM

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bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 30, 2026, 11:13 AM

#

@soft lark, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

tranquil wyvern Mar 30, 2026, 11:15 AM

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bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 30, 2026, 11:15 AM

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@tranquil wyvern, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

dire night Mar 30, 2026, 11:21 AM

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bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 30, 2026, 11:21 AM

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@dire night, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

proper wedge Mar 30, 2026, 11:21 AM

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bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 30, 2026, 11:21 AM

#

@proper wedge, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

#

Registration will be closing in about 30 seconds.

#

Registration is now closed!

#

Let the battle begin!

#

The fighting has begun to die down...

#

The fighting has stopped!

#

There are 11 players remaining.
@empty ocean, @jolly swift, @raw moss, @soft lark, @dire night, @tranquil wyvern, @long vine, @proper wedge, @rose jewel, @livid shuttle, and @mossy jolt
Send me a private message to register for the final battle.
We will continue the battle in 2-4 minutes.

#

The fighting begins again!

#

@empty ocean wanted a Peddler's Hat, but @livid shuttle wanted the Traveling Merchant's wares. @empty ocean killed the Traveling Merchant first. @empty ocean died.

#

@soft lark thought putting on Tiki Armor would give them the ability to swing off vines. @soft lark died.

#

@dire night tried to sneak around a high-security area while carrying two Target Dummies. However, the dummies were too thick and the sound of them clapping together alerted the guards. @dire night died.

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@proper wedge was ordered by @raw moss to sing a song or be killed. @proper wedge tried to sing the parody song "Revenge" and got killed immediately. @proper wedge died.

#

@rose jewel tried to get @tranquil wyvern to listen to them by blowing through a conch, but was interrupted when a boulder crashed into them and knocked them off a cliff. @rose jewel died.

#

@livid shuttle was bitten by a radioactive human and transformed into Human-Man, a superhero with human-like powers!

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@mossy jolt went swimming during a Blood Moon. Their white swimsuit was ruined.

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@jolly swift and @long vine had a friendly competition over who could blow the most bubbles.

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@livid shuttle was searching for buried treasure in the wilderness when they were suddenly frozen with ice magic and stabbed to death by a team of 20 people who wanted their spade. @livid shuttle died.

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@tranquil wyvern almost felt as if they were being controlled by an all-powerful being who was pressing keys randomly.

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@mossy jolt tried to file a lawsuit because Worm Food doesn't have a label that reads, "Warning: not for human consumption".

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@tranquil wyvern pulled out their Green Phasesaber and started madly swinging it at ghosts. It didn't have any effect, so @tranquil wyvern pulled out a vacuum instead.

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@jolly swift learned how to perform some killer yoyo tricks. @mossy jolt found out that @jolly swift meant "killer" in the literal sense. @mossy jolt died.

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@tranquil wyvern started mining some quartz, but it came to life, got angry, and destroyed them in a trivia battle. @tranquil wyvern died.

#

@long vine made a box of Lihzahrd Bricks around the spawn point. @raw moss joined but was completely unable to do anything, including eating or drinking. @raw moss died.

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@jolly swift bragged to @long vine about their combat skills. @long vine didn't really know @jolly swift and had no idea how this conversation started.

#

@jolly swift tried swallowing a pill that was so large, it crushed their heart against their ribcage. @jolly swift died.

#

The battle is over!

#

The Winner is @long vine!

Prize Time!

1000 points go to 1st place: @long vine
500 points go to 2nd place: @jolly swift
250 points go to 3rd place: @raw moss
150 points go to 4th place: @tranquil wyvern
150 points go to 5th place: @mossy jolt
150 points go to 6th place: @livid shuttle
100 points go to 7th place: @rose jewel
100 points go to 8th place: @proper wedge
100 points go to 9th place: @dire night
100 points go to 10th place: @soft lark

Thanks for Playing Everyone!

#

Registration is open!
Type bb!register to join the next battle!
The battle will start at the next 30 minute mark (e.g. 1:30, 2:30, 3:30).

soft lark Mar 30, 2026, 11:40 AM

#

bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 30, 2026, 11:40 AM

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@soft lark, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

waxen marlin Mar 30, 2026, 11:42 AM

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bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 30, 2026, 11:42 AM

#

@waxen marlin, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

jolly swift Mar 30, 2026, 11:46 AM

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bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 30, 2026, 11:46 AM

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@jolly swift, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

long vine Mar 30, 2026, 11:48 AM

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bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 30, 2026, 11:48 AM

#

@long vine, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

steel sentinel Mar 30, 2026, 11:48 AM

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bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 30, 2026, 11:48 AM

#

@steel sentinel, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

dire night Mar 30, 2026, 11:49 AM

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bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 30, 2026, 11:49 AM

#

@dire night, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

remote pumice Mar 30, 2026, 11:50 AM

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bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 30, 2026, 11:50 AM

#

@remote pumice, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

vague sequoia Mar 30, 2026, 11:52 AM

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bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 30, 2026, 11:52 AM

#

@vague sequoia, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

uneven grove Mar 30, 2026, 12:00 PM

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bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 30, 2026, 12:00 PM

#

@uneven grove, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

storm latch Mar 30, 2026, 12:08 PM

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bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 30, 2026, 12:08 PM

#

@storm latch, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

tranquil wyvern Mar 30, 2026, 12:11 PM

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bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 30, 2026, 12:11 PM

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@tranquil wyvern, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

#

@livid shuttle, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

amber ermine Mar 30, 2026, 12:14 PM

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bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 30, 2026, 12:14 PM

#

@amber ermine, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

slender quarry Mar 30, 2026, 12:23 PM

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bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 30, 2026, 12:23 PM

#

@slender quarry, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

proper wedge Mar 30, 2026, 12:29 PM

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bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 30, 2026, 12:29 PM

#

@proper wedge, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

#

Registration will be closing in about 30 seconds.

#

Registration is now closed!

#

Let the battle begin!

#

The fighting has begun to die down...

#

The fighting has stopped!

#

There are 15 players remaining.
@jolly swift, @slender quarry, @soft lark, @dire night, @vague sequoia, @long vine, @remote pumice, @proper wedge, @tranquil wyvern, @amber ermine, @storm latch, @steel sentinel, @waxen marlin, @livid shuttle, and @uneven grove
Send me a private message to register for the final battle.
We will continue the battle in 2-4 minutes.

#

The fighting begins again!

#

@storm latch invented a machine that could stop time around them! Except it also stopped time for the air molecules around them, so they were stuck rigidly in place until the effects wore off.

#

@slender quarry was blown up. Fortunately, it was just a gust of Mighty Wind that blew them up into the sky. Unfortunately, they weren't wearing a Lucky Horseshoe. @slender quarry died.

#

@jolly swift opened a weapon shop, selling secondhand weapons salvaged from fallen heroes. Stonks.

#

@tranquil wyvern mistranslated their game and ended up wielding "The Legend of Sheep on Earth".

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@dire night faintly heard screams echoing from the Dungeon, though it was hard to hear over the sound of buzzing hornets.

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@vague sequoia kept talking, but stopped after @livid shuttle held up their hand. @livid shuttle demonstrated the power of the Force.

#

@proper wedge spiced up @soft lark's soup with a Red Potion, sending them on a one-way trip to Flavortown. @soft lark died.

#

Playing with over 500 mods gave @dire night some nasty glitches and a severe lag spike, so they decided to (improperly) reboot their com- @dire night died.

#

@amber ermine spent all their luck on getting an Unlucky Yarn, and was vaporized by a dark spell meant for @steel sentinel. @amber ermine died.

#

@long vine caused @waxen marlin to fall in love with a duck by using a Love Potion. The two are now happily married.

#

@vague sequoia invented a Cat Cannon, because everyone knows that an airbourne cat is much deadlier than a bunny.

#

@tranquil wyvern learned some "nail arts" from an old master. They gained the ability to create exquisite fingernail art with colored nail polish.

#

@remote pumice tried hacking into @steel sentinel's computer and succeeded, in a sense. @steel sentinel's computer now has a butcher's knife stuck in it.

#

@storm latch put on a VR headset, but within a few hours of using it, their brain activity and heartbeat completely stopped. What on earth happened in there? @storm latch died.

#

@proper wedge was galloping at maximum speed on a Unicorn mount when they hit a random speed bump. That speed bump turned out to be @waxen marlin. @waxen marlin died.

#

@tranquil wyvern lulled @uneven grove into a false sense of security by typing "lul" over and over, and then stabbed them in the kidney. @uneven grove died.

#

@proper wedge panicked during a fight and drank out of the first red-colored potion bottle they could get out of their bag. It wasn't a healing potion. @proper wedge died.

#

@steel sentinel ran out of bullets while fighting @vague sequoia, but managed to kill them anyways by yeeting the gun towards their face. @vague sequoia died.

#

@long vine heard heavy breathing behind them and whirled around, ready for a fight! But it was just @remote pumice, who had a cold and really needed a tissue.

#

@remote pumice challenged @steel sentinel to a duel. Unfortunately for them, Mom said that it was @steel sentinel's turn to win. @remote pumice died.

#

@long vine took a sip from an Invisibility potion and stood perfectly still while @tranquil wyvern and @jolly swift ran past, before running away in the opposite direction as soon as they were out of sight.

#

@tranquil wyvern tried developing a technique called "respawning", but was silenced permanently before they could finish. Such powers are too dangerous to exist in this world. @tranquil wyvern died.

#

All that glitters is not gold. @jolly swift disproved this by putting gold in all glitter, but before long, they were completely broke.

#

@jolly swift tried to cheat and change their world to Christmas time, but ended up stuck in a time loop for all of eternity. We'll assume @jolly swift died.

#

@livid shuttle swung a Lead Shortsword at @long vine, but missed due to a lag spike just before it connected.

#

The Angler accidentally inhaled some of @steel sentinel's Vile Powder! However, nothing appears to have changed.

#

@livid shuttle drank a Dangersense Potion and noticed that @steel sentinel was highlighted in red. They found out it was because they had just eaten a bunch of Honey Blocks.

#

A Clown tossed a Happy Bomb right behind @livid shuttle. They should have been alerted by the sound of the hissing fuse, but they were wearing AirPods and couldn't hear it. @livid shuttle died.

#

@steel sentinel shouted "MOBILE 1.3 WHEN", just because they missed saying it.

#

@long vine underestimated a baby shark. They got eaten, digested, and turned into baby shark doo-doo. @long vine died.

#

The battle is over!

#

The Winner is @steel sentinel!

Prize Time!

1000 points go to 1st place: @steel sentinel
500 points go to 2nd place: @long vine
250 points go to 3rd place: @livid shuttle
150 points go to 4th place: @jolly swift
150 points go to 5th place: @tranquil wyvern
150 points go to 6th place: @remote pumice
100 points go to 7th place: @vague sequoia
100 points go to 8th place: @proper wedge
100 points go to 9th place: @uneven grove
100 points go to 10th place: @waxen marlin

Thanks for Playing Everyone!

#

Registration is open!
Type bb!register to join the next battle!
The battle will start at the next 30 minute mark (e.g. 1:30, 2:30, 3:30).

#

@uneven grove, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

jolly swift Mar 30, 2026, 12:39 PM

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bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 30, 2026, 12:39 PM

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@jolly swift, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

vague sequoia Mar 30, 2026, 12:39 PM

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bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 30, 2026, 12:39 PM

#

@vague sequoia, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

acoustic mica Mar 30, 2026, 12:39 PM

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bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 30, 2026, 12:39 PM

#

@acoustic mica, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

long vine Mar 30, 2026, 12:42 PM

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bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 30, 2026, 12:42 PM

#

@long vine, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

steel sentinel Mar 30, 2026, 12:46 PM

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bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 30, 2026, 12:46 PM

#

@steel sentinel, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

amber ermine Mar 30, 2026, 12:48 PM

#

bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 30, 2026, 12:48 PM

#

@amber ermine, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

soft lark Mar 30, 2026, 12:58 PM

#

bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 30, 2026, 12:58 PM

#

@soft lark, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

dire night Mar 30, 2026, 1:00 PM

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bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 30, 2026, 1:00 PM

#

@dire night, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

storm latch Mar 30, 2026, 1:03 PM

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bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 30, 2026, 1:03 PM

#

@storm latch, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

tranquil wyvern Mar 30, 2026, 1:12 PM

#

bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 30, 2026, 1:12 PM

#

@tranquil wyvern, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

near mortar Mar 30, 2026, 1:12 PM

#

bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 30, 2026, 1:12 PM

#

@near mortar, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

proper wedge Mar 30, 2026, 1:21 PM

#

bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 30, 2026, 1:21 PM

#

@proper wedge, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

hexed notch Mar 30, 2026, 1:24 PM

#

bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 30, 2026, 1:24 PM

#

@hexed notch, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

flat shale Mar 30, 2026, 1:26 PM

#

bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 30, 2026, 1:26 PM

#

@flat shale, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

arctic temple Mar 30, 2026, 1:27 PM

#

bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 30, 2026, 1:27 PM

#

@arctic temple, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

carmine cairn Mar 30, 2026, 1:28 PM

#

bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 30, 2026, 1:28 PM

#

@carmine cairn, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

raw moss Mar 30, 2026, 1:29 PM

#

bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 30, 2026, 1:29 PM

#

@raw moss, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

#

Registration will be closing in about 30 seconds.

#

Registration is now closed!

#

Let the battle begin!

#

The fighting has begun to die down...

#

The fighting has stopped!

#

There are 18 players remaining.
@carmine cairn, @jolly swift, @flat shale, @raw moss, @hexed notch, @soft lark, @dire night, @vague sequoia, @long vine, @proper wedge, @tranquil wyvern, @amber ermine, @storm latch, @steel sentinel, @acoustic mica, @arctic temple, @uneven grove, and @near mortar
Send me a private message to register for the final battle.
We will continue the battle in 2-4 minutes.

#

The fighting begins again!

#

@flat shale's NPCs kept complaining about a Blood Moon, so @flat shale responded by throwing a lamp at them in the hopes that it would "brighten their day."

#

@jolly swift climbed high into the trees and showered confetti over @soft lark and @acoustic mica.

#

@storm latch promised to @arctic temple that they would never give them up, nor let them down.

#

@tranquil wyvern hoped to go out in a truly EPIC fashion this time around. But a really menacing-looking bunny started coming their way...

#

@uneven grove played Terraria on their 3DS, but couldn't seem to find a third dimension anywhere.

#

@dire night ate a Honey Clock. It was a very time-consuming process.

#

@vague sequoia touched a colorful mushroom and was transported to a fantasy world filled with mushroom-headed people ruled by a magical princess.

#

@dire night's character file was deleted by a jealous NPC who wanted @dire night to notice them. @dire night died.

#

@vague sequoia was buried under an avalanche that @near mortar had triggered using a Firework Rocket. @vague sequoia died.

#

@long vine fired their Wasp Gun, but it was pointed the wrong way, and they ended up swallowing a bunch of Wasps. @long vine died.

#

@hexed notch suddenly realized that "hitherto" is pronounced "hither-two" and not "hit-her-toe". The way they were pronouncing it in their head had been hitherto incorrect.

#

@amber ermine brought a blanket into battle to help them feel more secure.

#

@raw moss constructed a beautiful dwarven fortress, only to realize that they were too tall to enter it.

#

Several players decided to host a Cinco de Mayo celebration! @near mortar was the bartender, @raw moss was the DJ, and @amber ermine was the pinata. @amber ermine died.

#

@storm latch drank a Teleportation Potion, got teleported into the sky, and did not bounce. @storm latch died.

#

@steel sentinel was on their way to SawCon, but they were ambushed and killed by a bunch of Mind Goblins. @steel sentinel died.

#

@acoustic mica put a ribbon on their pet's head to make it look cuter. It still looked like a tarantula, though.

#

@acoustic mica realized that they weren't wearing any pants, and died of embarrassment. @acoustic mica died.

#

@uneven grove overwhelmed @arctic temple with a storm of flying bananas. @arctic temple died.

#

@uneven grove ate several plates of shark sashimi and got a bad case of mercury poisoning. @uneven grove died.

#

@near mortar finally received a Daedalus Stormbow after killing 25 Hallowed Mimics! In their excitement, they forgot to finish off the 26th and got chomped in half. @near mortar died.

#

@proper wedge looked at the moon with their Sextant and realized that they were all about to meet with a terrible fate.

#

@raw moss flossed their teeth with @soft lark's shoelaces.

#

@flat shale was hired as a bouncer, but got fired on the spot after they showed up wearing an outfit made of Silly Balloons.

#

@jolly swift sold their soul to the Angler and received 2 Crate Potions in return.

#

@carmine cairn didn't know how to confess their love to their crush @proper wedge, and ended up crushing them with a Chlorophyte Warhammer. @proper wedge died.

#

@hexed notch was dismayed to discover that there was no toilet paper in the toilet paper holder.

#

@hexed notch and @carmine cairn were playing hide and seek in the jungle when @hexed notch fell into a deep hole full of Derplings and got stomped to death. @hexed notch died.

#

@soft lark left pieces of Gingerbread Cookie behind them to keep track of where they had been.

#

@jolly swift took a potato chip... and ate it!

#

@flat shale was attacked by pirates, but managed to defeat them by pinging the staff and getting them banned one by one.

#

@raw moss baited their fishing pole with a carrot, hoping to catch a Bunnyfish. Instead, they caught a Balloon Pufferfish.

#

@tranquil wyvern forgot the passcode to their Cell Phone and couldn't teleport home in time. @tranquil wyvern died.

#

@soft lark embarked on an epic dragon-slaying quest with thirteen companions! Sadly, they had barely left the gate when @soft lark tripped over a small rock and broke their neck. @soft lark died.

#

@flat shale's connection was lost. Please wait - attempting to reestablish... @flat shale died.

#

@jolly swift entered a boxing tournament. They did pretty well until the final match, where they got their face rearranged by a bald, dark-skinned man named Matt. @jolly swift died.

#

@raw moss took a trip to the desert, where a sandstorm caused them to stumble blindly into an Antlion pit. @raw moss died.

#

The battle is over!

#

The Winner is @carmine cairn!

Prize Time!

1000 points go to 1st place: @carmine cairn
500 points go to 2nd place: @raw moss
250 points go to 3rd place: @jolly swift
150 points go to 4th place: @flat shale
150 points go to 5th place: @soft lark
150 points go to 6th place: @tranquil wyvern
100 points go to 7th place: @hexed notch
100 points go to 8th place: @proper wedge
100 points go to 9th place: @near mortar
100 points go to 10th place: @uneven grove

Thanks for Playing Everyone!

#

Registration is open!
Type bb!register to join the next battle!
The battle will start at the next 30 minute mark (e.g. 1:30, 2:30, 3:30).

jolly swift Mar 30, 2026, 1:42 PM

#

bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 30, 2026, 1:42 PM

#

@jolly swift, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

tranquil wyvern Mar 30, 2026, 1:45 PM

#

bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 30, 2026, 1:45 PM

#

@tranquil wyvern, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

amber ermine Mar 30, 2026, 1:46 PM

#

bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 30, 2026, 1:46 PM

#

@amber ermine, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

glossy jewel Mar 30, 2026, 1:50 PM

#

bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 30, 2026, 1:50 PM

#

@glossy jewel, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

raw moss Mar 30, 2026, 2:01 PM

#

bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 30, 2026, 2:01 PM

#

@raw moss, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

brave shore Mar 30, 2026, 2:05 PM

#

bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 30, 2026, 2:05 PM

#

@brave shore, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

storm latch Mar 30, 2026, 2:07 PM

#

bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 30, 2026, 2:07 PM

#

@storm latch, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

soft lark Mar 30, 2026, 2:14 PM

#

bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 30, 2026, 2:14 PM

#

@soft lark, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

dire night Mar 30, 2026, 2:23 PM

#

bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 30, 2026, 2:23 PM

#

@dire night, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

waxen marlin Mar 30, 2026, 2:25 PM

#

bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 30, 2026, 2:25 PM

#

@waxen marlin, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

carmine cairn Mar 30, 2026, 2:25 PM

#

bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 30, 2026, 2:25 PM

#

@carmine cairn, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

arctic temple Mar 30, 2026, 2:25 PM

#

bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 30, 2026, 2:25 PM

#

@arctic temple, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

lofty saffron Mar 30, 2026, 2:29 PM

#

bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 30, 2026, 2:29 PM

#

@lofty saffron, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

#

Registration will be closing in about 30 seconds.

#

Registration is now closed!

#

Let the battle begin!

#

The fighting has begun to die down...

#

The fighting has stopped!

#

There are 13 players remaining.
@carmine cairn, @jolly swift, @raw moss, @soft lark, @dire night, @tranquil wyvern, @amber ermine, @lofty saffron, @storm latch, @waxen marlin, @glossy jewel, @brave shore, and @arctic temple
Send me a private message to register for the final battle.
We will continue the battle in 2-4 minutes.

#

The fighting begins again!

#

@tranquil wyvern and @soft lark played with a Beach Ball, trying to set a world record for the largest number of bounces.

#

@glossy jewel literally impeached @dire night by squashing them under a giant peach. @dire night died.

#

@carmine cairn wrote a book about the history of Terraria. Everyone loved it, except for the Mechanic.

#

@amber ermine tried to kill the Wall of Flesh with a Platinum Shortsword. @amber ermine died.

#

@storm latch was minding their own beeswax when they were abruptly impaled by Queen Bee. @storm latch died.

#

@waxen marlin ignored the Old Man's warnings and wandered into the Dungeon, thinking that the fight with Skeletron was optional. @waxen marlin died.

#

Instead of spending 6 minutes washing the dishes manually, @brave shore spent 6 hours failing to automate the process.

#

@lofty saffron considered fighting with their bare hands, but decided not to risk messing up their delicate fingernails.

#

The Demolitionist told @arctic temple that it was a good day to die. @arctic temple thought so too. @arctic temple died.

#

@raw moss summoned a majestic white dragon with blue eyes and ordered it to attack @glossy jewel's life points directly. @glossy jewel died.

#

@soft lark began questioning the fundamental nature of morality.

#

@soft lark sacrificed four swords to a Demon Altar hoping to get a Night's Edge. Unfortunately, they used the wrong swords, and the altar exploded. @soft lark died.

#

@lofty saffron summoned the Eye of Cthulhu and prepared for a fight, but out of nowhere a falling star fell and split the Eye in two. Victory?

#

@jolly swift playfully poked @brave shore and laughed. @brave shore playfully poked them back with a Cobalt Naginata. @jolly swift died.

#

@raw moss somehow ended up in a dark cave without any torches.

#

@tranquil wyvern stuck a Nature's Gift into a Mana Potion bottle and claimed to have invented a new accessory.

#

@tranquil wyvern ate some pufferfish sashimi because they heard that it was to die for. @tranquil wyvern died.

#

@carmine cairn stole @raw moss's lemons. @raw moss got their revenge by inventing combustible lemons and using them to burn @carmine cairn's house down.

#

@brave shore gazed at clouds with @lofty saffron. One cloud looked like a bunny, one looked like a dragon, and one looked like a floating island with treasure on it. But that was just their imagination, probably.

#

@brave shore had a sleepover with @lofty saffron, but the house was gone when they woke up.

#

@raw moss tried to take the square root of their previous answer on a scientific calculator, and somehow summoned a shoe.

#

@carmine cairn looked directly at the sun with heavily polarized sunglasses, and discovered that the sun was actually a giant baby head.

#

Out of boredom, @raw moss used a Gravity Globe to repeatedly flip up and down while spinning around in a swivel chair.

#

@lofty saffron solved a differential equation by counting on their fingers.

#

@carmine cairn and @brave shore fought over the last sandvich in the fridge. @carmine cairn won by breaking @brave shore's spine. @brave shore died.

#

@lofty saffron saw the light at the end of the tunnel. Unfortunately, it was actually a lifeform disintegration rainbow. @lofty saffron died.

#

@raw moss started making random animal noises. Their friends tried hard to pretend that they didn't know them.

#

@raw moss was listening to heavy metal when they were suddenly squashed by a falling anvil. @raw moss died.

#

The battle is over!

#

The Winner is @carmine cairn!

Prize Time!

1000 points go to 1st place: @carmine cairn
500 points go to 2nd place: @raw moss
250 points go to 3rd place: @lofty saffron
150 points go to 4th place: @brave shore
150 points go to 5th place: @tranquil wyvern
150 points go to 6th place: @jolly swift
100 points go to 7th place: @soft lark
100 points go to 8th place: @glossy jewel
100 points go to 9th place: @arctic temple
100 points go to 10th place: @waxen marlin

Thanks for Playing Everyone!

#

Registration is open!
Type bb!register to join the next battle!
The battle will start at the next 30 minute mark (e.g. 1:30, 2:30, 3:30).

arctic temple Mar 30, 2026, 2:39 PM

#

bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 30, 2026, 2:39 PM

#

@arctic temple, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

#

@livid shuttle, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

steel sentinel Mar 30, 2026, 2:45 PM

#

bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 30, 2026, 2:45 PM

#

@steel sentinel, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

storm latch Mar 30, 2026, 2:48 PM

#

bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 30, 2026, 2:48 PM

#

@storm latch, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

glossy jewel Mar 30, 2026, 2:48 PM

#

bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 30, 2026, 2:48 PM

#

@glossy jewel, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

tranquil wyvern Mar 30, 2026, 2:53 PM

#

bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 30, 2026, 2:53 PM

#

@tranquil wyvern, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

waxen marlin Mar 30, 2026, 2:55 PM

#

bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 30, 2026, 2:55 PM

#

@waxen marlin, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

jolly swift Mar 30, 2026, 3:09 PM

#

bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 30, 2026, 3:09 PM

#

@jolly swift, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

slender quarry Mar 30, 2026, 3:20 PM

#

bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 30, 2026, 3:20 PM

#

@slender quarry, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

grizzled flint Mar 30, 2026, 3:24 PM

#

bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 30, 2026, 3:24 PM

#

@grizzled flint, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

carmine cairn Mar 30, 2026, 3:29 PM

#

bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 30, 2026, 3:29 PM

#

@carmine cairn, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

#

Registration will be closing in about 30 seconds.

#

Registration is now closed!

#

Let the battle begin!

#

The fighting has begun to die down...

#

The fighting has stopped!

#

There are 11 players remaining.
@carmine cairn, @jolly swift, @slender quarry, @tranquil wyvern, @grizzled flint, @storm latch, @steel sentinel, @waxen marlin, @glossy jewel, @livid shuttle, and @arctic temple
Send me a private message to register for the final battle.
We will continue the battle in 2-4 minutes.

#

The fighting begins again!

#

@waxen marlin became convinced that they were a dinosaur. They started running around and eating all the wildlife while laying eggs and committing tax fraud.

#

@jolly swift took too much time while looting a Water Chest. @jolly swift died.

#

@carmine cairn tried adding lava to junk food to give it an extra kick. It worked, became wildly popular, and can now be bought in supermarkets across the globe.

#

@slender quarry didn't care to look at their Obsidian Skin buff duration. @slender quarry died.

#

@arctic temple eavesdropped on people's conversations, and learned some things that they probably shouldn't know.

#

@grizzled flint tried to assemble an Ankh Shield, but something went wrong and they ended up smashing hundreds upon hundreds of eggs instead.

#

@tranquil wyvern tried to defeat the Old One's Army, but accidentally unleashed it upon the rest of the world. Oops.

#

@livid shuttle asked @glossy jewel if they "knew the way". @glossy jewel didn't chuckle. Instead, they flexed their knuckles. Oh no.

#

@storm latch pickpocketed @steel sentinel, but for some reason only managed to steal a bunch of sunflowers.

#

@grizzled flint tried to mine Cobalt ore with a Copper Pickaxe, and eventually succumbed to old age. @grizzled flint died.

#

@carmine cairn was attacked by a Deadly Sphere, but defeated it by using multivariable calculus.

#

@tranquil wyvern tried to feed an anaconda with hot dog buns, but it wanted none.

#

@arctic temple was dying of hunger on The Constant seed, but they were saved when they slipped and fell, and a shawarma with extra tahini, apple slice, and 3 liters of water fell into their mouth.

#

@glossy jewel tried to eat some ice cream, but it melted because they weren't cool enough.

#

@storm latch got slaughtered by the Twins' superb teamwork. Remember, there is no "eye" in "team"! @storm latch died.

#

@waxen marlin put a toilet paper roll into the toilet paper holder the wrong way and was sentenced to death by toilet swirly. @waxen marlin died.

#

@arctic temple's barbeque grill wasn't hot enough to work with so they decided to flirt with it. How bbqute.

#

@steel sentinel watched a love story unfold between two bunnies. Several scenes later, both bunnies were dead: one from poison, and the other from a self-inflicted dagger wound.

#

@glossy jewel had the high ground, but @carmine cairn just blew it up with a Rocket Launcher, sending @glossy jewel toppling to their doom. @glossy jewel died.

#

@livid shuttle started slurping a noodle, but the other end was nowhere in sight. To this day, it is said that @livid shuttle is still slurping that noodle.

#

@steel sentinel made some special sauce out of random things they found on the ground, and offered 1 gold coin to any potential taste testers. No one applied.

#

@livid shuttle started speaking in a nonexistent language, which freaked @arctic temple and @tranquil wyvern out.

#

@livid shuttle walked off the edge of a cliff while playing Pokemon Go. @livid shuttle died.

#

@carmine cairn won a prize for being the 1,000,000th person to edit the Vampire Knives page on the Terraria Wiki to say that it might be a JoJo reference.

#

@arctic temple accidentally dropped a stick of Dynamite near Plantera's Bulb before they were finished excavating their arena. @arctic temple died.

#

@tranquil wyvern asked for @steel sentinel's autograph. At first, @steel sentinel was flattered, but they then realized they were wearing Red's set.

#

@carmine cairn cut through @tranquil wyvern with a glowing 1000 degree knife. @tranquil wyvern died.

#

@steel sentinel reached the expiration date that was printed on their packaging label. @steel sentinel died.

#

The battle is over!

#

The Winner is @carmine cairn!

Prize Time!

1000 points go to 1st place: @carmine cairn
500 points go to 2nd place: @steel sentinel
250 points go to 3rd place: @tranquil wyvern
150 points go to 4th place: @arctic temple
150 points go to 5th place: @livid shuttle
150 points go to 6th place: @glossy jewel
100 points go to 7th place: @waxen marlin
100 points go to 8th place: @storm latch
100 points go to 9th place: @grizzled flint
100 points go to 10th place: @slender quarry

Thanks for Playing Everyone!

#

Registration is open!
Type bb!register to join the next battle!
The battle will start at the next 30 minute mark (e.g. 1:30, 2:30, 3:30).

glossy jewel Mar 30, 2026, 3:38 PM

#

bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 30, 2026, 3:38 PM

#

@glossy jewel, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

near mortar Mar 30, 2026, 3:41 PM

#

bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 30, 2026, 3:41 PM

#

@near mortar, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

dire night Mar 30, 2026, 3:42 PM

#

bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 30, 2026, 3:42 PM

#

@dire night, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

raw moss Mar 30, 2026, 3:45 PM

#

bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 30, 2026, 3:45 PM

#

@raw moss, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

exotic saddle Mar 30, 2026, 3:56 PM

#

bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 30, 2026, 3:56 PM

#

@exotic saddle, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

waxen marlin Mar 30, 2026, 4:02 PM

#

bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 30, 2026, 4:02 PM

#

@waxen marlin, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

storm latch Mar 30, 2026, 4:06 PM

#

bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 30, 2026, 4:06 PM

#

@storm latch, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

uneven grove Mar 30, 2026, 4:08 PM

#

bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 30, 2026, 4:08 PM

#

@uneven grove, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

arctic temple Mar 30, 2026, 4:09 PM

#

bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 30, 2026, 4:09 PM

#

@arctic temple, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

steel sentinel Mar 30, 2026, 4:10 PM

#

bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 30, 2026, 4:10 PM

#

@steel sentinel, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

strong sierra Mar 30, 2026, 4:13 PM

#

bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 30, 2026, 4:13 PM

#

@strong sierra, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

tranquil wyvern Mar 30, 2026, 4:16 PM

#

bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 30, 2026, 4:16 PM

#

@tranquil wyvern, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

carmine cairn Mar 30, 2026, 4:25 PM

#

bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 30, 2026, 4:25 PM

#

@carmine cairn, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

maiden walrus Mar 30, 2026, 4:25 PM

#

bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 30, 2026, 4:25 PM

#

@maiden walrus, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

#

Registration will be closing in about 30 seconds.

#

Registration is now closed!

#

Let the battle begin!

#

The fighting has begun to die down...

#

The fighting has stopped!

#

There are 14 players remaining.
@carmine cairn, @raw moss, @dire night, @tranquil wyvern, @maiden walrus, @exotic saddle, @storm latch, @steel sentinel, @waxen marlin, @glossy jewel, @strong sierra, @arctic temple, @uneven grove, and @near mortar
Send me a private message to register for the final battle.
We will continue the battle in 2-4 minutes.

#

The fighting begins again!

#

@dire night accidentally set their house on fire while cooking bacon in their oven, but stayed inside because it smelled too good in there. @dire night died.

#

@maiden walrus ate a ham baguette before a major surgery. @maiden walrus died.

#

@exotic saddle opened a Goodie Bag hoping for a sweet Bat Hook, but only got a Creeper set. Aw, man.

#

@steel sentinel tried to shoot an apple off of @exotic saddle's head. @steel sentinel's arrow flew straight and true, and the apple was perfectly unharmed. @exotic saddle died.

#

@storm latch stayed in their house playing Terraria for so long that they depleted all the oxygen in the building. @storm latch died.

#

@arctic temple marked their territory. How, you might ask? By carving distinctive marks into the bark of a nearby tree. Don't be disgusting.

#

@waxen marlin was caught by a giant, and their bones were ground up and turned into bread. @waxen marlin died.

#

@strong sierra attacked @carmine cairn with a Legendary Zenith, but @carmine cairn's pen was mightier. @strong sierra died.

#

@tranquil wyvern got punched in the face by the Golem. Fortunately, they were wearing the appropriate personal protective equipment.

#

@arctic temple put a portable hole in their bag of holding, and got sucked into the astral plane. @arctic temple died.

#

@glossy jewel found a Life Fruit and carefully broke it. It fell into a pit full of Angry Trappers.

#

A monkey dramatically raised @near mortar up on a cliff and crowned them the king of Africa. Unfortunately, the monkey accidentally yeeted @near mortar off said cliff. @near mortar died.

#

@steel sentinel grabbed their Web Slinger and leapt from building to building, delivering pizza.

#

@uneven grove used their sink, but nothing happened because they didn't have water pipes installed yet.

#

@tranquil wyvern dug a trap hole and filled it with hundreds of swords. @raw moss fell into the hole, and found their inventory full of free swords!

#

@steel sentinel wrote a story that was so realistic, a monster crawled out of the book and killed them. @steel sentinel died.

#

@glossy jewel flew around with a Gravitation Potion, but was so used to the old mechanics that they threw up all over @carmine cairn when the world was flipped.

#

@tranquil wyvern fought Skeletron in Expert mode and mistakenly let their guard down after destroying both of its hands.

#

@uneven grove had a lucid dream in which they fell asleep and had a lucid dream about lucid dreaming. Sadly, their 36-hour nap was interrupted when @raw moss shot them with an arrow. @uneven grove died.

#

@carmine cairn started mining, using a Starfury to reveal ores. Then it revealed a spider cave, and @carmine cairn decided that they were done with mining for the day.

#

@glossy jewel wished the scenes would go by a bit faster.

#

@tranquil wyvern finished reading H.P. Lovecraft's "Call of Cthulhu", and thought Cthulhu would be a great guy to work for.

#

@carmine cairn murdered @tranquil wyvern by smashing them with an object that looked like a statue of "The Thinker", but was actually a functioning clock. @tranquil wyvern died.

#

@glossy jewel thought it would be clever to tie a rope to their leg and attach it to the Dungeon entrance so they wouldn't get lost. Unfortunately, a rat chewed through the rope and they got lost anyways.

#

@raw moss ate a Face Monster's face. It could use a little more salt.

#

@raw moss used their embezzled funds to shred through @glossy jewel with a Coin Gun. @glossy jewel died.

#

@carmine cairn tried to make a caramelized dessert by mixing honey with water and lava, but ended up just making Crispy Honey Blocks and Obsidian.

#

@raw moss found a baby Nebula Floater and managed to stuff it into a bag.

#

@carmine cairn had a nutty idea, and tried to fire acorns out of a Venus Magnum. Obviously, this failed.

#

@raw moss invented a weird drink that they called "T". What does "T" even stand for?

#

@raw moss received an injection of unicorn magic from a unicorn. @raw moss died.

#

The battle is over!

#

The Winner is @carmine cairn!

Prize Time!

1000 points go to 1st place: @carmine cairn
500 points go to 2nd place: @raw moss
250 points go to 3rd place: @glossy jewel
150 points go to 4th place: @tranquil wyvern
150 points go to 5th place: @uneven grove
150 points go to 6th place: @steel sentinel
100 points go to 7th place: @near mortar
100 points go to 8th place: @arctic temple
100 points go to 9th place: @strong sierra
100 points go to 10th place: @waxen marlin

Thanks for Playing Everyone!

#

Registration is open!
Type bb!register to join the next battle!
The battle will start at the next 30 minute mark (e.g. 1:30, 2:30, 3:30).

glossy jewel Mar 30, 2026, 4:39 PM

#

bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 30, 2026, 4:39 PM

#

@glossy jewel, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

uneven grove Mar 30, 2026, 4:41 PM

#

bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 30, 2026, 4:41 PM

#

@uneven grove, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

dire night Mar 30, 2026, 4:41 PM

#

bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 30, 2026, 4:41 PM

#

@dire night, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

arctic temple Mar 30, 2026, 4:41 PM

#

bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 30, 2026, 4:41 PM

#

@arctic temple, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

wet merlin Mar 30, 2026, 4:43 PM

#

bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 30, 2026, 4:43 PM

#

@wet merlin, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

raw moss Mar 30, 2026, 4:43 PM

#

bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 30, 2026, 4:43 PM

#

@raw moss, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

waxen marlin Mar 30, 2026, 4:44 PM

#

bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 30, 2026, 4:44 PM

#

@waxen marlin, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

maiden walrus Mar 30, 2026, 4:50 PM

#

bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 30, 2026, 4:50 PM

#

@maiden walrus, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

steel sentinel Mar 30, 2026, 4:52 PM

#

bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 30, 2026, 4:52 PM

#

@steel sentinel, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

small sphinx Mar 30, 2026, 4:54 PM

#

bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 30, 2026, 4:54 PM

#

@small sphinx, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

strong sierra Mar 30, 2026, 4:56 PM

#

bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 30, 2026, 4:56 PM

#

@strong sierra, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

turbid swan Mar 30, 2026, 4:58 PM

#

bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 30, 2026, 4:58 PM

#

@turbid swan, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

storm latch Mar 30, 2026, 5:03 PM

#

bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 30, 2026, 5:03 PM

#

@storm latch, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

jolly swift Mar 30, 2026, 5:08 PM

#

bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 30, 2026, 5:08 PM

#

@jolly swift, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

tranquil wyvern Mar 30, 2026, 5:11 PM

#

bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 30, 2026, 5:11 PM

#

@tranquil wyvern, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

livid shuttle Mar 30, 2026, 5:20 PM

#

bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 30, 2026, 5:20 PM

#

@livid shuttle, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

undone notch Mar 30, 2026, 5:22 PM

#

bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 30, 2026, 5:22 PM

#

@undone notch, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

carmine cairn Mar 30, 2026, 5:27 PM

#

bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 30, 2026, 5:27 PM

#

@carmine cairn, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

#

Registration will be closing in about 30 seconds.

#

Registration is now closed!

#

Let the battle begin!

#

The fighting has begun to die down...

#

The fighting has stopped!

#

There are 18 players remaining.
@carmine cairn, @jolly swift, @undone notch, @raw moss, @dire night, @tranquil wyvern, @maiden walrus, @turbid swan, @small sphinx, @storm latch, @steel sentinel, @waxen marlin, @livid shuttle, @glossy jewel, @strong sierra, @arctic temple, @uneven grove, and @wet merlin
Send me a private message to register for the final battle.
We will continue the battle in 2-4 minutes.

#

The fighting begins again!

#

@raw moss wondered how floating islands defied gravity. At that very moment, gravity started working again, and thousands of tons of rock fell directly onto @raw moss's head. @raw moss died.

#

@dire night picked a fight with a goose. @dire night died.

#

@glossy jewel returned to their house, only to find that @strong sierra had built walls around it and filled it with honey.

#

@storm latch tried to attack @small sphinx with a Possessed Hatchet, but it ended up chasing both of them away from each other.

#

@wet merlin was building some cramped wooden boxes for their NPCs when they noticed a swarm of locusts and frogs approaching in the distance.

#

@maiden walrus jumped out of a window onto a mattress below. The mattress turned out to be a sidewalk painting. @maiden walrus died.

#

@small sphinx failed to properly hydrate. @small sphinx died.

#

@storm latch tried to escape from their pursuer by playing dead. Unfortunately for them, their pursuer was a boulder. @storm latch died.

#

@waxen marlin caught on fire and burned to a crisp for no apparent reason. @waxen marlin died.

#

@jolly swift found a worm crawling around in the rain and tried feeding it with some Worm Food, but nothing happened.

#

@arctic temple was so determined to learn how to do a split that they split their body in half using a chainsaw. Well... that's one way to do it! @arctic temple died.

#

The Goblins and Pirates were engaged in an all-out war. @uneven grove was caught in the crossfire. @uneven grove died.

#

@undone notch used the power of Flex Tape to stick @wet merlin in place, leaving them unable to move or eat. Fortunately, a vulture soon arrived and brought @wet merlin's suffering to a swift end. @wet merlin died.

#

@turbid swan walked around the shore trying to salvage items from wrecked ships, but only managed to find a slightly sticky bottle of motion sickness pills.

#

@turbid swan tried eating a piece of beef jerky that was so tough, they died of exhaustion while chewing it. @turbid swan died.

#

@undone notch started doing too well in the Epic Battle, and was blown up by a flying blue turtle shell. @undone notch died.

#

While in the Underground Jungle, @glossy jewel used their Starfury to collect Jungle Spores. They promptly realized their mistake as an angry matriarch came their way. @glossy jewel died.

#

@tranquil wyvern was offered a chance to monetize their scene, but declined because they have a strong sense of integrity. Almost as strong as Flex Tape, now available at a hardware store near you. Buy now while supplies last.

#

@strong sierra thought about breathing, and suddenly became conscious of every individual breath that they were taking. Then they started thinking about blinking, too.

#

@strong sierra trapped @tranquil wyvern in a maze, but while they were taunting @tranquil wyvern, they accidentally revealed the secret way to get out.

#

@steel sentinel wanted to do something controversial, so they cut up a pineapple and put the pineapple chunks on a pizza.

#

@livid shuttle wouldn't stop complaining about the wrong person dying in epic battle scenes. It was getting annoying, so @strong sierra killed them. @strong sierra died.

#

@carmine cairn saw a bright light in the distance. Could that be what they had been looking for all along? No, it was an Undead Miner.

#

@tranquil wyvern tried to catch a Gold Bunny in front of their door but accidentally used a Tin Shortsword instead of a Bug Net.

#

@tranquil wyvern was driving towards the battle when their car suddenly transformed into a humanoid robot while they were still inside. @tranquil wyvern died.

#

@livid shuttle stepped onto a "fall trap" and got dunked into a vat of boiling hot pumpkin spice latte. @livid shuttle died.

#

@jolly swift started a throwing class-only playthrough, but then Redigit snapped his fingers and @jolly swift suddenly didn't feel so good. @jolly swift died.

#

@steel sentinel crafted a Pearlwood Sword. @carmine cairn laughed at them, not knowing that @steel sentinel was just a completionist.

#

@carmine cairn chewed some gum. It made @carmine cairn feel as if they were being crushed by a meteor. Didn't know gum could do that. @carmine cairn died.

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The battle is over!

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The Winner is @steel sentinel!

Prize Time!

1000 points go to 1st place: @steel sentinel
500 points go to 2nd place: @carmine cairn
250 points go to 3rd place: @jolly swift
150 points go to 4th place: @livid shuttle
150 points go to 5th place: @tranquil wyvern
150 points go to 6th place: @strong sierra
100 points go to 7th place: @glossy jewel
100 points go to 8th place: @undone notch
100 points go to 9th place: @turbid swan
100 points go to 10th place: @wet merlin

Thanks for Playing Everyone!

#

Registration is open!
Type bb!register to join the next battle!
The battle will start at the next 30 minute mark (e.g. 1:30, 2:30, 3:30).

jolly swift Mar 30, 2026, 5:39 PM

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bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 30, 2026, 5:39 PM

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@jolly swift, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

turbid swan Mar 30, 2026, 5:39 PM

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bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 30, 2026, 5:39 PM

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@turbid swan, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

glossy jewel Mar 30, 2026, 5:39 PM

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bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 30, 2026, 5:39 PM

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@glossy jewel, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

strong sierra Mar 30, 2026, 5:40 PM

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bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 30, 2026, 5:40 PM

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@strong sierra, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

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@livid shuttle, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

mossy jolt Mar 30, 2026, 5:50 PM

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bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 30, 2026, 5:50 PM

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@mossy jolt, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

abstract thunder Mar 30, 2026, 5:52 PM

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bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 30, 2026, 5:52 PM

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@abstract thunder, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

tranquil wyvern Mar 30, 2026, 5:52 PM

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bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 30, 2026, 5:52 PM

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@tranquil wyvern, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

steel sentinel Mar 30, 2026, 6:02 PM

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bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 30, 2026, 6:02 PM

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@steel sentinel, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

wet merlin Mar 30, 2026, 6:06 PM

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bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 30, 2026, 6:06 PM

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@wet merlin, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

waxen marlin Mar 30, 2026, 6:08 PM

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bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 30, 2026, 6:08 PM

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@waxen marlin, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

grizzled flint Mar 30, 2026, 6:22 PM

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bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 30, 2026, 6:22 PM

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@grizzled flint, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

carmine cairn Mar 30, 2026, 6:25 PM

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bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 30, 2026, 6:25 PM

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@carmine cairn, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

dire night Mar 30, 2026, 6:29 PM

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bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 30, 2026, 6:29 PM

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@dire night, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

#

Registration will be closing in about 30 seconds.

#

Registration is now closed!

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Let the battle begin!

#

The fighting has begun to die down...

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The fighting has stopped!

#

There are 14 players remaining.
@carmine cairn, @jolly swift, @dire night, @tranquil wyvern, @grizzled flint, @turbid swan, @steel sentinel, @waxen marlin, @abstract thunder, @glossy jewel, @livid shuttle, @mossy jolt, @strong sierra, and @wet merlin
Send me a private message to register for the final battle.
We will continue the battle in 2-4 minutes.

#

The fighting begins again!

#

@livid shuttle wiggled their ears - first the right one, then the left - stuck out their tongue, and turned @dire night into an apple. @dire night died.

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@turbid swan drank a flask of poison, and was fatally poisoned because capitalization matters. @turbid swan died.

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@mossy jolt and the Arms Dealer were arrested for trading Illegal Gun Parts after @waxen marlin tattled on them.

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@carmine cairn used scientific reasoning to prove that the world is flat.

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@strong sierra shot @steel sentinel with a Water Gun. @steel sentinel shot them right back with a Slime Gun. What an epic battle this is turning out to be.

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@waxen marlin swallowed a Beenade and died in a way far too graphic to describe. @waxen marlin died.

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@jolly swift died. However, they channeled their inner VSauce and committed "Or did I?" Suddenly, @jolly swift was revived.

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While riding on minecart rails, @abstract thunder accelerated to the point of creating a singularity. @abstract thunder died.

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@glossy jewel got stomped on the head and eventually squashed flat by a desk lamp. @glossy jewel died.

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@jolly swift called @livid shuttle a "boomer", which caused them to literally explode. @livid shuttle died.

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@steel sentinel wanted to know how much Dynamite they should use to make a Plantera arena. The answer is yes.

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@mossy jolt drank too many Ironskin Potions and hardened into a metal sculpture. @mossy jolt died.

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@wet merlin's neck was snapped by an Angel Statue. @wet merlin died.

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@carmine cairn was arrested for stealing a shoe and got sent to a prison camp where they were forced to dig holes all day.

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@carmine cairn met their demise after being fatally killed to death. Somehow, the quadruple-negative cancelled itself out, and @carmine cairn ended up completely fine.

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@steel sentinel made a painting of the Wall of Flesh. Now they can be Horrified whenever they want. Hooray!

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While examining a strange emblem, @grizzled flint accidentally summoned Moon Lord, who slapped them. @grizzled flint died.

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@strong sierra's Lucky Lucky Horseshoe wasn't lucky enough. @strong sierra died.

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@tranquil wyvern thought that loading a dart trap with fireworks would be a good idea for a party, but they forgot to hammer it to make it shoot upwards. @tranquil wyvern died.

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@jolly swift pointed their hot dog menacingly towards @carmine cairn.

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@steel sentinel returned home after spending an enjoyable holiday break within the deepest pits of hell.

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@jolly swift ate a pound of sugar-free gummy bears. Their corpse was found in the center of a smoldering, extremely smelly crater a few hours later. @jolly swift died.

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@steel sentinel spotted a security camera high up in the trees. Was there something going on that they didn't know about?

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@carmine cairn solved the plastic pollution problem by draining the entire ocean.

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@steel sentinel threw a block of cheese at an invading Martian Saucer.

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@carmine cairn and @steel sentinel attacked each other with Life Drains. In the end, both of them ran out of mana, and no one was damaged.

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The Solar Pillar dropped a fireball on @carmine cairn's noggin right as they finally killed the 100th Solar Pillar enemy. @carmine cairn died.

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The battle is over!

#

The Winner is @steel sentinel!

Prize Time!

1000 points go to 1st place: @steel sentinel
500 points go to 2nd place: @carmine cairn
250 points go to 3rd place: @jolly swift
150 points go to 4th place: @tranquil wyvern
150 points go to 5th place: @strong sierra
150 points go to 6th place: @grizzled flint
100 points go to 7th place: @wet merlin
100 points go to 8th place: @mossy jolt
100 points go to 9th place: @livid shuttle
100 points go to 10th place: @glossy jewel

Thanks for Playing Everyone!

#

Registration is open!
Type bb!register to join the next battle!
The battle will start at the next 30 minute mark (e.g. 1:30, 2:30, 3:30).

wet merlin Mar 30, 2026, 6:42 PM

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bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 30, 2026, 6:42 PM

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@wet merlin, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

turbid swan Mar 30, 2026, 6:43 PM

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bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 30, 2026, 6:43 PM

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@turbid swan, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

dire night Mar 30, 2026, 6:45 PM

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bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 30, 2026, 6:45 PM

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@dire night, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

tranquil wyvern Mar 30, 2026, 6:51 PM

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bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 30, 2026, 6:51 PM

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@tranquil wyvern, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

amber ermine Mar 30, 2026, 6:55 PM

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bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 30, 2026, 6:55 PM

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@amber ermine, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

arctic temple Mar 30, 2026, 6:55 PM

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bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 30, 2026, 6:55 PM

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@arctic temple, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

steel sentinel Mar 30, 2026, 7:02 PM

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bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 30, 2026, 7:02 PM

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@steel sentinel, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

carmine cairn Mar 30, 2026, 7:04 PM

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bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 30, 2026, 7:04 PM

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@carmine cairn, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

exotic saddle Mar 30, 2026, 7:05 PM

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bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 30, 2026, 7:05 PM

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@exotic saddle, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

glossy jewel Mar 30, 2026, 7:13 PM

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bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 30, 2026, 7:13 PM

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@glossy jewel, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

steel sentinel Mar 30, 2026, 7:35 PM

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bb!register

maiden walrus Mar 30, 2026, 7:41 PM

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bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 30, 2026, 7:41 PM

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@maiden walrus, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.

steel sentinel Mar 30, 2026, 7:47 PM

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bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 30, 2026, 7:47 PM

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@steel sentinel, you are already registered for the upcoming battle.

#

Registration is open!
Type bb!register to join the next battle!
The battle will start at the next 30 minute mark (e.g. 1:30, 2:30, 3:30).

steel sentinel Mar 30, 2026, 7:57 PM

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bb!register

gleaming groveBOT Mar 30, 2026, 7:57 PM

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@steel sentinel, you have successfully been registered for the upcoming battle.