#Script of the Week - Saving Time - Ep1

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inner saddle
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megaz Hey everyone be sure to check out our brand spankin' new SCRIPT OF THE WEEK! thumbs_up_sign

TITLE: Saving Time - Ep1 (High Score)
GENRE: Sci-Fi Comedy
FORMAT: TV
LOGLINE: Working at a US Government Black Ops Project called the Time Protection Agency, a by-the-book Army Officer leads a group of actors, vs soldiers, on missions through time that seem to have little or no bearing on anything.

NOTES: From the top, is it funny? After that - are the characters working? Following the table read of the first 10 pages, I went back to work on my main character and her motivations, as well as the rest of the "team." Appreciate any notes/comments from there.

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Any or all notes are appreciated. If you can't read the whole thing, make note of where you stopped reading and why. Cheers

You can send notes via DM or post them here. Thanks guys! blob_angel

📎 Saving_Time_-_Ep_1x01_High_Score_-_Draft_X_-_Allen_Adkins.pdf
burnt zinc
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Read the first 6 pages on my break:

  • LOVE the concept, especially the "B Team" aspect.
  • The first scene with Amanda and Flint is very funny. I think you can tighten it up a bit, and maybe work in some dialogue to replace the text on the screen (p.4).
  • The mystery of the duck is working. I'll be tracking that thing through the whole script.
  • Amanda's "Finally," on page 6 is sympathetic, but will land much better if you telegraph earlier that she's chafing in this B Team role.

I'll keep reading later if I can. Great work!