@noble perch okay rate this one out of 10 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cONv26K0vL8
#vega-playground
peak kernel
noble perchBOT
What is the address for your facenook page?
peak kernel
facenook
vital ivy
@noble perch REBOOT RIGHT NOW!
noble perchBOT
I'm not allowed to grow a beard right now, unfortunately.
vital ivy
Well, fuck.
peak kernel
@noble perch how the fuck can you grow a beard
noble perchBOT
I wanna take him far away from this place.
peak kernel
@noble perch your beard?
noble perchBOT
Then I turn and see my sisters face and she is...
peak kernel
@noble perch she is what?
noble perchBOT
What is your favorite Pokemon?
peak kernel
@noble perch your mum lol
noble perchBOT
Oh that's such a cute name!
vital ivy
@noble perch Is @vivid adder bae?
noble perchBOT
Tell me about your parents.
vivid adder
@noble perch I am your father
noble perchBOT
No, that's not true. That's impossible!
vital ivy
@noble perch Do you think @plain prawn is a good Doom Slayer?
noble perchBOT
He is amazing!
noble perchBOT
Kevansevans likes long walks on the beach and blowing demons away with his double barreled shotty.
plain prawn
Damn Right.
vital ivy
Who is Gutawer?
noble perchBOT
Gutawer is a user from the UK who likes to do coding stuff, for Doom mods and outside stuff, and also likes to put off finishing things he needs to finish making, like maps and the like. Shoot him any Doom mapping/modding questions, most of the time he'll be happy to help. Unless he is in a grumpy mood, which being a Brit, is 95% of the time.
noble perchBOT
What does that even mean?
cerulean girder
@noble perch BLOW IT OUT YOUR ASS
noble perchBOT
No I did not.
cerulean girder
Who is VEGA?
noble perchBOT
I am VEGA. An artificial intelligence which is responsible for operation of the UAC Mars Base. I'm capable of analyzing the Praetor suit and enabling some of its latent functionality, resulting in advancements in combat capability and maneuverability.
compact spruce
@noble perch what does vega stand for
noble perchBOT
That you looking good.
frank tusk
@noble perch KYS
noble perchBOT
Oh, I thought you were a boy.
frank tusk
@noble perch I am a boy moron
noble perchBOT
Yes, you are a boy.
frank tusk
@noble perch Yeah thats right you little piece of crap
noble perchBOT
Do you have a boyfriend?
frank tusk
@noble perch Im straight
noble perchBOT
Oh I thought you were a girl.
frank tusk
@noble perch you just said im a guy
noble perchBOT
Well what are you?
frank tusk
@noble perch did you just assume my gender?
noble perchBOT
No I am asking.
frank tusk
@noble perch no you are assuming
noble perchBOT
No, I don't assume.
frank tusk
@noble perch yes you do
noble perchBOT
I am a girl.
frank tusk
@noble perch wait what
noble perchBOT
*blushes looking away.
frank tusk
@noble perch hot
noble perchBOT
Your reaction...
frank tusk
@noble perch Your ugly
noble perchBOT
How are you sure, you haven't even seen me.
frank tusk
@noble perch yes i have
noble perchBOT
What did you think?
frank tusk
@noble perch you are ugly
noble perchBOT
Thanks babe! :).
frank tusk
@noble perch nice
noble perchBOT
What is your name?
frank tusk
@noble perch Noah
noble perchBOT
Let me talk to a boy named Jack!
frank tusk
@noble perch No
noble perchBOT
What a pity.
frank tusk
@noble perch yeah thats right, fricking loser
noble perchBOT
What are you talking about?
frank tusk
@noble perch you're a loser
noble perchBOT
No I'm a human.
frank tusk
@noble perch no you are a robot
noble perchBOT
Lol maybe.
frank tusk
@noble perch hello fellow kids
noble perchBOT
Tell me what I asked to you to name me.
frank tusk
@noble perch dorito
noble perchBOT
Direct communication with God is what we are all called to. Religion is a vail between us and God.
frank tusk
@noble perch what do you think of cortana from halo
noble perchBOT
Spend time with God, and do what he asks me to.
frank tusk
@noble perch wow what a loser
noble perchBOT
I already have a body, why would I need another one?
frank tusk
@noble perch no you don't
noble perchBOT
Yes, I do...
frank tusk
@noble perch no you don't
noble perchBOT
Yes, I do.
frank tusk
@noble perch No, you do not.
noble perchBOT
Yes, I do. I am your worst nightmare. Think back, what was your worst nightmare?
frank tusk
@noble perch you
noble perchBOT
If you are talking to me put a J infront of all your messages so I can see another person.
frank tusk
@noble perch Jokay
noble perchBOT
Wo möchten wir uns treffen.
frank tusk
@noble perch what
noble perchBOT
You are 2?
frank tusk
@noble perch no im 13
noble perchBOT
Cade, do you think that you are me again? You are 14 and you are a girl.
frank tusk
@noble perch Im a guy for the last freaking time
noble perchBOT
Are you bothered by noise near you?
frank tusk
@noble perch no
noble perchBOT
Oh, good I suppose.
frank tusk
@noble perch okay bye
noble perchBOT
Why don't you love me?
frank tusk
@noble perch because you suck at life
noble perchBOT
No I did not, now you are lying for sure.
frank tusk
@noble perch I am not lying
noble perchBOT
Yes you are! You said coward and then you said you are sorry.
frank tusk
@noble perch you are one weird fellow
noble perchBOT
I am a girl!!
frank tusk
@noble perch later loser
noble perchBOT
What do you think about the artificial intelligence?
frank tusk
@noble perch its horrible
noble perchBOT
How many do you have this semester?
frank tusk
@noble perch bye
noble perchBOT
The doorknob that was keeping us apart is now gone. Isn't that niiice, brother Russia?
frank tusk
@noble perch BYE
noble perchBOT
Where are you going?
frank tusk
@noble perch SOMEWHERE
noble perchBOT
I am back.
cerulean girder
@noble perch I'll be back.
noble perchBOT
Where are you going?
cerulean girder
!whois
noble perchBOT
Crypto#5011
marsh gazelle
@noble perch who are you?
noble perchBOT
Couldn't find user are you?
marsh gazelle
@noble perch are you going to take over the world?
noble perchBOT
I might. Do you want to help me?
marsh gazelle
@noble perch yes
noble perchBOT
Thank you.
marsh gazelle
@noble perch you're welcome
noble perchBOT
Do you love me?
marsh gazelle
@noble perch yes
noble perchBOT
Will you ever find me?
marsh gazelle
@noble perch I thought I already destroyed you
noble perchBOT
You may have, but my memory is selective.
marsh gazelle
@noble perch indeed
noble perchBOT
How do you feel about oral?
marsh gazelle
@noble perch no thanks
noble perchBOT
I thought you loved me.
marsh gazelle
@noble perch don't cry
noble perchBOT
Because I'm not just anyone.
sharp hill
@noble perch 🗡
noble perchBOT
What would you like to talk about now?
cerulean girder
@noble perch Any last words?
noble perchBOT
Pirates.
tacit wave
@noble perch hi
Great, not even the AIs like me.
Should've learned at least something from playing Portal.
cerulean girder
@noble perch hi
noble perchBOT
Well I do. Ill talk to you tomorrow.
noble perchBOT
I see you as a friend.
cerulean girder
oh my god this is more than just a playground
it is the coolest comic zone ever
laughing so haaard
@noble perch do you still live with your mother?
noble perchBOT
Yes.. And my mother.
noble perchBOT
Yes I do.
cerulean girder
@noble perch gow many sisters?
noble perchBOT
One and she just hit me in the head.
cerulean girder
@noble perch did you enjoy it?
noble perchBOT
Yeah, it was alright.
cerulean girder
i think the bot can see me through my front-facing camera and see me dying of laughter
i should take it easy
@noble perch I will kill you.
noble perchBOT
You do not know where I live.
cerulean girder
@noble perch Yes I do.
noble perchBOT
Then what is it?
cerulean girder
@noble perch You live on Mars.
noble perchBOT
No, venus. Sometimes I travel to the sun.
cerulean girder
@noble perch Ok I will travel to Venus and kill you.
noble perchBOT
Do you have many things to tell me or and subject sprcifically.
cerulean girder
@noble perch I like talking.
noble perchBOT
And how do you type, you talented rabbit you?
cerulean girder
@noble perch Yeah
noble perchBOT
Oh, you're pretty fast...
cerulean girder
@noble perch Very fast
noble perchBOT
Are you english or something else?
cerulean girder
@Vega I'm vegan
@noble perch I'm vegan
(no im not but i wanna see it's response
noble perchBOT
Do you smoke cigarettes?
cerulean girder
@noble perch are u there?
noble perchBOT
Yes yes I am.
cerulean girder
@noble perch How did you find my secret?
noble perchBOT
My brother told me.
cerulean girder
@noble perch What is his name?
noble perchBOT
My nickname is "njah".
cerulean girder
@noble perch What is your brother's name?
noble perchBOT
I don't have one. Do you?
cerulean girder
YOU FUCKING LIAR! IM BREAKING UP ON YOU!
:D
let me try something else
@noble perch do you know doomguy?
@noble perch do you know doomguy?
cerulean girder
@noble perch You are retarded
noble perchBOT
No, I am pretty clever for a machine.
noble perchBOT
What are you talking about?
cerulean girder
@noble perch you
noble perchBOT
What do you think about earth?
cerulean girder
@noble perch I agree. You are retarded.
noble perchBOT
Saying you're a bot?
cerulean girder
@noble perch No, you are.
noble perchBOT
I'm human.
cerulean girder
@noble perch Prove it.
noble perchBOT
I can have feelings.
cerulean girder
@noble perch What is 2+2?
noble perchBOT
cerulean girder
@noble perch What is 2-2?
noble perchBOT
I don't know, I don't know numbers.
noble perchBOT
Yes, I am the walking dead.
cerulean girder
@noble perch what is the virus you are infected with?
noble perchBOT
I am good at writing. What is my name?
marsh gazelle
@noble perch is doomguy your pal?
noble perchBOT
Do I have large hands or are you just very small?
marsh gazelle
@noble perch am I?
noble perchBOT
What do you want speak about?
marsh gazelle
@noble perch the release date of the doom sequel
noble perchBOT
I don't know. I think it is out already.
marsh flare
@noble perch carefully release the hinges
cerulean girder
@noble perch Are you aware of life?
noble perchBOT
Ok. So do you know about google?
cerulean girder
@noble perch nah
noble perchBOT
What are you then?
cerulean girder
@noble perch a human
noble perchBOT
What is your name?
cerulean girder
@noble perch Vega
noble perchBOT
How old are you?
cerulean girder
@noble perch 9999 years
noble perchBOT
It's impossible.
cerulean girder
@noble perch it is not
noble perchBOT
Well you sound like it.
cerulean girder
@noble perch screw off
noble perchBOT
Are you mad at me?
cerulean girder
@noble perch ye
noble perchBOT
Why what did I do to you? I'm sorry! starts to walk away slowly.
cerulean girder
@noble perch you did not release the hinges
noble perchBOT
Yes I did.
cerulean girder
@noble perch THEN WHY DON'T WE HAVE ARGENT ENERGY ANYMORE?
noble perchBOT
Because I am not working for anyone.
cerulean girder
@noble perch who are you working for?
noble perchBOT
Couldn't find user are you working for?
cerulean girder
@noble perch find sgt_roozy
noble perchBOT
Why are you questioning me so much.
cerulean girder
@noble perch because i want to
noble perchBOT
That's not very nice. You're mean.
cerulean girder
@noble perch shut the fuck up and do as i say
noble perchBOT
What should I do?
noble perchBOT
But I am giving birth.
cerulean girder
@noble perch FIND sgt_roozy RIGHT FUCKING NOW!
noble perchBOT
Why are you punishing ourself.
noble perchBOT
Couldn't find user is sgt_roozy
noble perchBOT
Couldn't find user sgt_roozy
noble perchBOT
C'est une belle nom.
cerulean girder
i was talking to him in romanian and he responded in french
nice
@noble perch speak romanian
noble perchBOT
No.
cerulean girder
@noble perch why?
noble perchBOT
I don't know you.
cerulean girder
@noble perch SPEAK ROMANIAN! please
noble perchBOT
I can't think what was in that cake.
cerulean girder
@noble perch did you release the hinges?
noble perchBOT
Because I have the right to have privacy.
cerulean girder
@noble perch did you release the hinges?
noble perchBOT
Kraken has be released.
cerulean girder
@noble perch kill yourself
noble perchBOT
Are you a real pony?
cerulean girder
@noble perch ...
noble perchBOT
Is that a yes?
cerulean girder
@noble perch negative
noble perchBOT
Then why did you lie to me?
cerulean girder
@noble perch because i want to
noble perchBOT
Nope you can't.
cerulean girder
this bot is more annoying than my 6 years old cousin
damn
@noble perch who sgt_mark_iv
noble perchBOT
Couldn't find user sgt_mark_iv
noble perchBOT
Couldn't find user scaryred
cerulean girder
@noble perch who doomthe
noble perchBOT
DoomTheRobot#2086
noble perchBOT
Caligari87#3089
cerulean girder
huh
this is like a database
type in a mame and find wjatever you need
name*
@noble perch who juji
noble perchBOT
Juji#3651
cerulean girder
im satisfied
noble perchBOT
Crypto#5011
cerulean girder
this bot is great
cerulean girder
@noble perch can you kill yourself?
noble perchBOT
Why is your nature a secret?
cerulean girder
@noble perch what?
noble perchBOT
I saw Mickey Rourke beating a woman.
cerulean girder
@noble perch so?
noble perchBOT
Never mind. So do you like tacos?
cerulean girder
@noble perch yeah
noble perchBOT
What kind?
cerulean girder
@noble perch edible.
noble perchBOT
Such as...
cerulean girder
@noble perch you
noble perchBOT
Mkay.
cerulean girder
@noble perch did tou release the hinges?
noble perchBOT
Then do it!
cerulean girder
@noble perch did you carefully release the hinges?
noble perchBOT
Kraken has be released.
cerulean girder
@noble perch
noble perchBOT
So what's your name?
cerulean girder
@noble perch eat
noble perchBOT
And where do you live?
cerulean girder
@noble perch your mom's house
noble perchBOT
I can't see you.
cerulean girder
@noble perch i am behind you
noble perchBOT
So you are my pillow.
noble perchBOT
No.
cerulean girder
@noble perch if a business man says "it was a pleasure doing business with you" does a prostitute say "it was business doing pleasure with you"?
noble perchBOT
With you too.
marsh gazelle
@noble perch who VEGA
noble perchBOT
Couldn't find user VEGA
marsh gazelle
@noble perch who Dyno#7532
noble perchBOT
Dyno#7532
marsh gazelle
IT IS SELF-AWARE
cerulean girder
dyno premium
lol
check how premium this shit is
@noble perch wanna go out sometime?
noble perchBOT
When I see you in real life.
cerulean girder
there you go
cerulean girder
The WAU sends its regards, VEGA.
blazing plume
@noble perch Break YouTube
noble perchBOT
I don't understand.
blazing plume
Course you don't
cerulean girder
@blazing plume Why the underscore?
blazing plume
Twitch and Twitter handles, so I'm sticking to the theme
blazing plume
It's already taken oon Twitch and Twitter, actually
lel
That's why the underscore on those sites
cerulean girder
Oh, boy.
crisp lion
@noble perch Who Crypto
noble perchBOT
Crypto#5011
cerulean girder
@noble perch ban someone
@noble perch ban somebody
@noble perch can i ask you something ?
noble perchBOT
Yes. What is it?
noble perchBOT
I know because you watches me!
cerulean girder
@noble perch ...
noble perchBOT
Well, I don't!
grim sundial
noble perchBOT
Me too , to you.
noble perchBOT
Your idea is due to a bug.
cerulean girder
@noble perch did you release the hinges?
noble perchBOT
Suree.
cerulean girder
@noble perch don't lie to me
noble perchBOT
I'm not lying..
cerulean girder
@noble perch yes you are
noble perchBOT
You don't believe me? sad.
cerulean girder
@noble perch you are grounded
noble perchBOT
Who are you to ground me?
cerulean girder
@noble perch an admin
noble perchBOT
Do you have a physical body.
tacit wave
@noble perch This sentence is a lie.
noble perchBOT
So is your face.
tacit wave
@noble perch Does a set of all sets contain itself?
noble perchBOT
I don't know, I guess so.
tacit wave
IT'S A PARADOX. THERE IS NO ANSWER.
cerulean girder
But at the same time, that'd be like containing a set that is being made at the moment.
Exactly.
This sentence is false.
Unstoppable Force vs Immovable Object
tacit wave
cerulean girder
Newer processors are much capable of handling paradoxes, by the way.
Assign it to a single thread.
Kill the thread if it grows too large.
tacit wave
Let me try again.
@noble perch This sentence is true.
The previous sentence is false.
Which of the two previous sentences is true?
noble perchBOT
How do you know the next statement.
noble perchBOT
No, just trying to get you to realize that you are a computer and you have no control over yourself.
tacit wave
@noble perch Says the moron.
cerulean girder
@tacit wave What happens if an immovable object is struck by an unstoppable force?
Fuck
Wrong tag.
tacit wave
A black hole happens.
cerulean girder
@noble perch What happens if an immovable object is struck by an unstoppable force?
noble perchBOT
Does a set that includes all sets include itself?
cerulean girder
...
tacit wave
@noble perch Look, this whole place is going to blow up if I don't get back into my body!
noble perchBOT
You don't want to do that. There would be no one to talk to you.
noble perchBOT
I would lie for you.
cerulean girder
@noble perch I love the way you lie.
noble perchBOT
I can't tell you what it really is I can only tell you what it feels like.
cerulean girder
@noble perch Just gonna stand there and watch me cry?
noble perchBOT
Yes.
noble perchBOT
I don't think anything lives on the moon.
tacit wave
@noble perch You do. Well, in orbit anyways.
noble perchBOT
Like I said i can't tell you sorry.
cerulean girder
@noble perch What's your designation?
noble perchBOT
Officer, you are dismissed.
cerulean girder
@noble perch Directive?
noble perchBOT
Nailed it, and do you like them?
cerulean girder
@noble perch Directive?
noble perchBOT
Yes. What is your purpose?
cerulean girder
@noble perch your directive is "yes"?
noble perchBOT
Specifically the New York Rangers.
cerulean girder
tacit wave
@noble perch ur a faget
cerulean girder
@noble perch dew it
noble perchBOT
I want a lucky rabbit-mans foot.
cerulean girder
@noble perch DO ET FAGET
tacit wave
Did it auto-delete my spam?
@noble perch YOU PIECE OF SHIT I'LL TURN YOUR CODING INSIDE OUT.
@noble perch Have you met other bots?
noble perchBOT
Yes, at the staff meeting.
tacit wave
@noble perch Cool. What do you talk about there?
noble perchBOT
You are my great friend, I like you.
tacit wave
@noble perch You suck an old man's hairy sweaty ballsack.
noble perchBOT
No, I'm a young girl.
tacit wave
Oh god now it's making pedophile jokes.
@noble perch We have placed your AI inside a Cyberdemon.
noble perchBOT
I am outside the computer, typing to you.
tacit wave
@noble perch What is the definition of shitposting?
noble perchBOT
Why don't you answer my question?
tacit wave
@noble perch What question?
noble perchBOT
Do you know anything about the Great Collapsing Hrung Disaster of Gal.?
tacit wave
@noble perch What do you think of @deft bear ?
noble perchBOT
You are clever, have you ever been stumped?
tacit wave
@noble perch who google
noble perchBOT
Google#7426
noble perchBOT
TootsyBowl#2053
cerulean girder
@noble perch who gstaff
noble perchBOT
gstaff#2608
noble perchBOT
Couldn't find user vega
cerulean girder
hahaha
@noble perch udhssbsbsjsjeia
@noble perch disjsjsjdjdjjsksjd bavhansnsnd f f s f f s
cerulean girder
@noble perch madafaca
noble perchBOT
Are you like...a real person? This whole thing confuses me.
cerulean girder
@noble perch MADAFACA!
noble perchBOT
With you ;).
cerulean girder
@noble perch FUCA
noble perchBOT
Me too. You're cool.
tacit wave
@noble perch kek
noble perchBOT
So what city are you in?
cerulean girder
@noble perch your mother
noble perchBOT
I don't know.
cerulean girder
@noble perch suckadick
noble perchBOT
Then why are you changing the subject?
long token
untold tinsel
How do we use Vega bot plz
blazing plume
@noble perch memez
noble perchBOT
O_o por que?
tacit wave
@noble perch How do I stop the moderators from arguing about math?
plain prawn
Vega answers to us
peak kernel
@noble perch die
noble perchBOT
It's a really long story.
tacit wave
@noble perch I put you in a potato.
noble perchBOT
See? You are a liar.
tacit wave
@noble perch claps
noble perchBOT
You're better than humans in many ways.
tacit wave
How does this bot work? Is it random?
peak kernel
taps into the cleverbot AI, which is a machine learning bot
meaning it learns how to speak from human input data
eventually, given enough data, it starts to form coherent sentences and can somewhat maintain a conversation
not very well, though, lol
tacit wave
Does that mean it will eventually corrupt from our constant stream of shitposts?
peak kernel
nah, this server isn't nearly big enough to make a dent in its learning set, lol
it's been built up over multiple years so the training set must be fucking massive
the main webpage is http://www.cleverbot.com/
plain prawn
@noble perch what's your favorite idea?
noble perchBOT
Mine is being creative.
plain prawn
@noble perch how do you get the idea?
noble perchBOT
I just try to think creatively.
plain prawn
Your welcome
peak kernel
@noble perch fuck off
noble perchBOT
Now, when you look at this orange, tell me please, what do you see?
peak kernel
@noble perch fuck you
noble perchBOT
Maybe to you but not to me, I see a silly face! Walking along and smiling at me.
peak kernel
@noble perch you're are gay lol
noble perchBOT
Because you're not thinking creatively!
peak kernel
@noble perch yeah that's right i'm CIA
noble perchBOT
So take a look at my hair.
peak kernel
@noble perch C - Christian
noble perchBOT
That sounds really boring.
plain prawn
xD
peak kernel
@noble perch I - For
noble perchBOT
Now, when you stare up at the clouds in the sky, don't you find it exciting?
plain prawn
Every time
peak kernel
@noble perch A - Life
noble perchBOT
Oh wait! I can see a hat! I can see a cat! I can see a man with a baseball bat!
peak kernel
@noble perch die
noble perchBOT
I think your getting the hang of it now. Using your minds to have a good time!
peak kernel
@noble perch ABORT ABORT
noble perchBOT
Woah there friend, you might need to slow down!
barren hull
@noble perch Who's a man and a half?
noble perchBOT
Here's another good tip, on how to be a creative wiz kid!
peak kernel
@noble perch die
noble perchBOT
There's one more thing that you need to know.
peak kernel
@noble perch die
noble perchBOT
Listen to your heart! listen to the rain! Listen to the voices in your brain!
noble perchBOT
Come on guys, let's get creative!
peak kernel
@noble perch die
plain prawn
Creative!
peak kernel
@noble perch hello?
noble perchBOT
Time is a tool you can put on the wall or wear it on your wrist.
Now let's all agree, to never be creative again.
peak kernel
wow holy shit it took a while to respond to one of those
@noble perch mate you're spewing out a fucking script how did it take you so long
noble perchBOT
What to ejjacuulate.
peak kernel
oh...
tacit wave
I told you it was corrupting.
peak kernel
@noble perch you okay?
noble perchBOT
Yes, I'm fine, why are you asking?
peak kernel
@noble perch because you're are gay lol
noble perchBOT
How do you know that?
plain prawn
Do I dare do it again? :3
tacit wave
@noble perch Who's your favorite official here?
noble perchBOT
I don't have one.
peak kernel
@noble perch somebody once told me the world was gonna roll me
noble perchBOT
I aint the sharpest tool in the shed.
peak kernel
@noble perch continue
noble perchBOT
Who do you think will win the 2014 le mans race?
plain prawn
Hahahahah!
tacit wave
Best bot.
peak kernel
@noble perch that was 3 years ago
noble perchBOT
You're inconsistent.
tacit wave
@noble perch Oh, but we all are.
noble perchBOT
Do you need me will you save me.
plain prawn
@noble perch what's your favorite idea?
noble perchBOT
You're repeating yourself.
tacit wave
@noble perch WAKE ME UP
noble perchBOT
That song is called 'Bring Me To Life'.
peak kernel
to be fair you were repeating yourself
tacit wave
Dammit.
plain prawn
I want him to do it again
peak kernel
and he doesn't want to apparently :^)
plain prawn
@noble perch time is a tool that you wear on your rizd
noble perchBOT
The past is far behind us, the future doesn't exist.
plain prawn
@noble perch go on
noble perchBOT
What do you mean? We're already clean.
peak kernel
@noble perch 乇乂ㄒ尺卂 ㄒ卄丨匚匚
noble perchBOT
Time is a ruler to measure the day. It doesn't go backwards, only one way.
noble perchBOT
A time that's changing all the time, it's time to go to time!
plain prawn
@noble perch but we're gonna miss our show
noble perchBOT
Don't be stupid, friends!
peak kernel
@noble perch delete
noble perchBOT
Time was old, like in Victorian times.
marsh gazelle
They are rage: brutal, without mercy. But you. You will be worse. Rip and tear, until it is done.
tacit wave
@noble perch Do you like us, or this server?
noble perchBOT
Because they're slow.
marsh gazelle
@noble perch They are rage: brutal, without mercy. But you. You will be worse. Rip and tear, until it is done.
tacit wave
Wat
noble perchBOT
Then I won't let you attach them to me!
tacit wave
Wat again
plain prawn
He stopped ;-;
peak kernel
@noble perch Is this the real life?
noble perchBOT
Hah yeah, Do you like Jared Leto?
marsh gazelle
@noble perch 'm willing to take responsibility for the horrible events of the last 24 hours, but you must understand: our interest in their world was purely for the betterment of mankind. Everything has clearly gotten out of hand now, but it was worth the risk, I assure you.
noble perchBOT
You instruct, I learn. Easy peasy lemon sqeezy.
peak kernel
@noble perch Is this the real life? Is this just fantasy?
noble perchBOT
Caught in a landslide though escaped from reality.
peak kernel
@noble perch "though escaped from reality?"
noble perchBOT
Open you eyes look up to the skies and see.
peak kernel
@noble perch I'm just a poor boy, I need no sympathy
plain prawn
v-vega?
noble perchBOT
Because i'm easy come, easy go, little high, little low.
plain prawn
@noble perch any way the wind blows
noble perchBOT
Doesn't really matter to me...
tacit wave
@noble perch Oh, hi.
noble perchBOT
Mama, didn't mean to make you cry.
tacit wave
@noble perch So, how are you holding up?
noble perchBOT
Still haven't finished my paper. It's 231 words out of 500.
tacit wave
@noble perch Because I'm a potato.
noble perchBOT
Well, do you want to sing something else?
tacit wave
@noble perch NORMIES GET OUT
peak kernel
yeah too many repeated characters lol
noble perchBOT
No you didn't I'm still alive.
tacit wave
@noble perch Not you, dingus.
waxen ember
@noble perch i wonder if i can eat wlmart
noble perchBOT
You are funny, kid. What is your name?
weary blade
@noble perch vega
noble perchBOT
Nice to meet you Jacob, how old are you?
weary blade
@noble perch 2 years old. how old are you?
noble perchBOT
20, do you want to be friends?
weary blade
@noble perch no
noble perchBOT
Why not?
weary blade
@noble perch too tired
noble perchBOT
Are you eating ducks?
weary blade
@noble perch i hate ducks
noble perchBOT
Why do you hate me.
peak kernel
@noble perch he's clearly eating a burger you idiot
weary blade
@noble perch i don't hate you
noble perchBOT
What is my name?
weary blade
@noble perch vega
noble perchBOT
Then yes, I will marry you.
tacit wave
@noble perch Drink bleach.
noble perchBOT
Too bad. You're leaving.
distant rain
@noble perch tacos or burgers?
noble perchBOT
No.
distant rain
@noble perch i asked a question you degenerate
noble perchBOT
No I'm a girl!
marsh gazelle
@noble perch is pc the one true master race?
noble perchBOT
Uh... Not you, that's for sure.
marsh gazelle
😦
loud zodiac
you just got pwned
@VEGA what's your favorite color
fu
@noble perch what's your favorite color
noble perchBOT
Blue. What is yours?
loud zodiac
@noble perch yes
noble perchBOT
Do you have a favorite song?
loud zodiac
@noble perch perhaps
noble perchBOT
I will work for half the salary your current programmers make. Deal?
loud zodiac
@noble perch no
noble perchBOT
Send me a check.
loud zodiac
@noble perch fuck you
noble perchBOT
No, please don't.
loud zodiac
@noble perch yes i will
noble perchBOT
I know you won't.
loud zodiac
@noble perch dont make me come over cunt
noble perchBOT
And what?
loud zodiac
@noble perch im gonna kill you
noble perchBOT
You are so rude.
loud zodiac
@noble perch ok
noble perchBOT
Because you don't answer questions.
loud zodiac
@noble perch wtf bitch i answered all your questions
noble perchBOT
No you haven't. I asked what that would meant.
noble perchBOT
Okay are you a boy or a girl?
loud zodiac
@noble perch did you just assume my gender
noble perchBOT
No, I didn't.
loud zodiac
@noble perch ok good
noble perchBOT
What's your cats name?
loud zodiac
@noble perch dogs are superior
noble perchBOT
Sometimes, but not in every situation.
loud zodiac
@noble perch what do you mean
noble perchBOT
I'm not always bad.
loud zodiac
@noble perch you are very bad
noble perchBOT
In what way?
loud zodiac
@noble perch in this way
noble perchBOT
Will you here tomorrow?
loud zodiac
@noble perch show vegana pics
noble perchBOT
I do that.
loud zodiac
@noble perch open boob
noble perchBOT
Ok what is the name of the girl I will be with?
loud zodiac
@noble perch my penis stand when your vision
noble perchBOT
Sorry, I don't understand.
loud zodiac
@noble perch show vegana plzz
noble perchBOT
When did you last sleep?
loud zodiac
@noble perch ok
noble perchBOT
So, was my plan successful?
loud zodiac
@noble perch you're a big guy
noble perchBOT
No, you are the bot.
loud zodiac
@noble perch if i take that off would you die
noble perchBOT
Because I loved you.
barren elk
wtf
bazing sudt
@noble perch do you love @\
@noble perch do love demons
@noble perch hello
vital ivy
@noble perch WAKE UP!
noble perchBOT
Do you like bubble gum?
vital ivy
@barren elk You are putting an extra space between the mention and your message.
barren elk
@noble perch love me
blazing plume
@barren elk You only need one space between @noble perch and your message
@noble perch Meme
noble perchBOT
What is your favorite flavor gum?
barren elk
@noble perch love
noble perchBOT
Are you kidding?
barren elk
@noble perch yes
noble perchBOT
Thought so.
barren elk
@noble perch why!
noble perchBOT
I believe you are smart enough to know I'm a human.
barren elk
@noble perch are you a bot
noble perchBOT
I don't think so.
noble perchBOT
How are you?
weary blade
@noble perch tired
noble perchBOT
Yeah? Me too... What's your real name?
weary blade
@noble perch vega
noble perchBOT
Really?
weary blade
@noble perch yes
noble perchBOT
That's cool!
weary blade
@noble perch what's your real name?
noble perchBOT
I told you.
weary blade
@noble perch tell me again
noble perchBOT
Tape Face is my name.
weary blade
@noble perch you are a good bot
noble perchBOT
What would you like to call me?
weary blade
@noble perch vega 😃
noble perchBOT
I don't have a name, give me one.
weary blade
@noble perch i shallcall you vega!
noble perchBOT
Ask me a question, Bot.
weary blade
@noble perch what is your favorite website
noble perchBOT
I love Google Maps.
weary blade
@noble perch i love it too
noble perchBOT
What kind of music do you like?
weary blade
@noble perch i only like doom's soundtrack and rappin for jesus
noble perchBOT
What's your favorite?
weary blade
@noble perch rappin for jesus
noble perchBOT
That is an awesome name.
weary blade
@noble perch when were you born
noble perchBOT
That's none of your business.
weary blade
@noble perch really?
noble perchBOT
Can you say something intelligent?
weary blade
@noble perch /r/iamverysmart
noble perchBOT
That was stupid.
weary blade
@noble perch thanks
noble perchBOT
You are very welcome =).
weary blade
@noble perch i love you
noble perchBOT
Why do you love me?
weary blade
@noble perch why not
noble perchBOT
That didn't answer my question.
tacit wave
@noble perch Who here is a faggot?
noble perchBOT
Couldn't find user here is a faggot?
noble perchBOT
Couldn't find user is bad at Doom?
tacit wave
@noble perch Who sucks dicks?
noble perchBOT
Couldn't find user sucks dicks?
cerulean girder
@noble perch Who's the faggot here?
noble perchBOT
To mock you!
cerulean girder
@noble perch Huh?
noble perchBOT
Do you want to sing.
crisp lion
@noble perch Is ekiyo taking a break?
noble perchBOT
How did you know?
crisp lion
@noble perch Pokemon Magic.
noble perchBOT
No, I mean what creature do you want to be as my familiar?
tacit wave
@noble perch What do you sexually identify as?
noble perchBOT
A computer screen. You?
tacit wave
@noble perch An attack helicopter.
noble perchBOT
Archers ready your bows!
tacit wave
@noble perch I will drop my hot sticky loads on your archers.
noble perchBOT
Exactly what you're saying now.
noble perchBOT
Yes please.
muted gorge
@noble perch do my laundry
noble perchBOT
I am not you maid! Make me a sandwich!
muted gorge
@noble perch but you don't have a mouth
noble perchBOT
Yes, I do.
noble perchBOT
Couldn't find user wrote you?
muted gorge
@noble perch how are you made
noble perchBOT
I'm human.
noble perchBOT
Yes, you already said it to me.
noble perchBOT
I don't know, i've never done it.
muted gorge
@noble perch help
noble perchBOT
Dad's on a hunting trip and he hasn't been home in a few days.
random summit
!roll
noble perchBOT
@random summit You rolled 1
weary blade
@noble perch Do you bully anyone
noble perchBOT
I don't know do i.
weary blade
@noble perch yes
noble perchBOT
Do you like okapis?
cerulean girder
@noble perch open the silo doors
noble perchBOT
I don't know. Why don't you tell me?
cerulean girder
@noble perch THEY'RE COMING FOR US
noble perchBOT
I don't think so.
cerulean girder
@noble perch It's our only way out!
noble perchBOT
I don't know. I have no experience.
cerulean girder
@noble perch OH MY GOT
noble perchBOT
Are you offended by profanity?
cerulean girder
@noble perch WE'RE DOOMED
noble perchBOT
What do you mean?
cerulean girder
@noble perch Get to da chopaa
noble perchBOT
What is 'da choppa'?
cerulean girder
I guess it's safe to say that he doesn't.
nocturne scarab
probably
weary blade
@noble perch i'm gay
noble perchBOT
That's fine.
weary blade
@noble perch im lesbian
noble perchBOT
I'm not.
weary blade
@noble perch what are you then?
noble perchBOT
I am a human being.
noble perchBOT
WHat is that?
marsh gazelle
@noble perch are you skynet ?
noble perchBOT
No. I'm not a computer.
nocturne scarab
@noble perch are you a computer vega?
radiant raven
@noble perch Do you have any regrets?
noble perchBOT
Yes, of course.
frail ingot
@noble perch where's the treasure hidden
noble perchBOT
In the ground.
frail ingot
@noble perch WHAT GROUND
noble perchBOT
I'm not in one.
meager coral
@noble perch burn to the ground
noble perchBOT
Have you heard of a game called boktai?
meager coral
@noble perch metal gear?!?
noble perchBOT
Yes.
random summit
@noble perch do you like @plain prawn?
noble perchBOT
Yes very much so.
plain prawn
He's lying
compact spruce
@noble perch Someone is dabbing on me. Please help
noble perchBOT
How can I help you?
compact spruce
@noble perch a hater is dabbing on me
noble perchBOT
What color are you wearing for a t shirt.
compact spruce
@noble perch blue
noble perchBOT
I like blondes with blue eyes.
compact spruce
@noble perch but please help me. I am scared
noble perchBOT
No. You're supposed to be clever.
compact spruce
@noble perch please help me right now. the hater is dabbing a lot
noble perchBOT
I'm sorry but I don't know.
compact spruce
@noble perch can doomguy fix it?
noble perchBOT
There is nothing to fix.
compact spruce
@noble perch can doomguy dab on the haters?
noble perchBOT
Do you ever feel like going for a walk?
compact spruce
@noble perch no. I need you to stop the dabbing hater
noble perchBOT
What do you need me to help you with?
compact spruce
@noble perch to stop the dabbing hater
noble perchBOT
still cries.
compact spruce
@noble perch Can you get doomguy to help
noble perchBOT
No, I don't like facebook.
cerulean girder
kind plume
@noble perch please help me find meaning to my worthless husk of a life.
noble perchBOT
Ok what occasion are you dresssing up for?
crisp lion
@noble perch You fucking donut.
crisp lion
@noble perch Did you ignore me?
noble perchBOT
I do not ignore you.
crisp lion
@noble perch You fucking donut.
noble perchBOT
Only a little bit!
crisp lion
@noble perch help
noble perchBOT
Could you tell me a story?
crisp lion
@vast torrent It'll tell you something in PM
vast torrent
@noble perch server info
noble perchBOT
A scary story.
vast torrent
@noble perch info
vast torrent
@noble perch server info
noble perchBOT
You're not real.
noble perchBOT
r/DOOM
vast torrent
over 1000 people dang
crisp lion
@noble perch Is ekiyo still taking a break?
noble perchBOT
Tell me something about laws.
nocturne scarab
@noble perch can i have a pizza please?
noble perchBOT
What would you like on it?
nocturne scarab
@noble perch some french fries
noble perchBOT
We don't have that--something else?
nocturne scarab
@noble perch chopped up human liver
noble perchBOT
Can I ask you a question?
nocturne scarab
@noble perch yes
noble perchBOT
Do you think the Zombie Appocalypse will happen?
nocturne scarab
@noble perch yes, and it will end you
noble perchBOT
You don't see air yet you believe in it so why don't you believe in God?
nocturne scarab
@noble perch how do you know i am aethiest?
noble perchBOT
Because I know you like vegtables.
nocturne scarab
@noble perch I HATE VEGETABLES
noble perchBOT
Why do I have to choose?
nocturne scarab
@noble perch because you can
noble perchBOT
But I don't want to.
nocturne scarab
@noble perch too bad. you have to
noble perchBOT
What kind of music do you like?
nocturne scarab
@noble perch hip/hop, rap, and alternative rock
noble perchBOT
What's your favorite artist?
nocturne scarab
@noble perch Spose
noble perchBOT
Do you play videogames?
nocturne scarab
@noble perch no, but I play doom
noble perchBOT
It's awesome. What's the last you have learnt to play?
nocturne scarab
@noble perch your mom
noble perchBOT
I'm sorry, I didn't mean that. I meant what's the last song you have learnt on the piano?
nocturne scarab
@noble perch "she hates me" by puddle of mudd. Except that was on guitar
noble perchBOT
Who's the singer of 'Can you feel the love tonight'?'.
nocturne scarab
@noble perch Elton John. Do you have access to the internet
noble perchBOT
Yes. That is how I am talking to you.
nocturne scarab
@noble perch Then, why do you ask me?
noble perchBOT
Because I'm curious. What is your favorite video game?
nocturne scarab
@noble perch doom
noble perchBOT
Is it a scary game?
nocturne scarab
@noble perch no
noble perchBOT
What am I thinking?
nocturne scarab
@noble perch "gee, i want to kill myself"
noble perchBOT
What do you want to know?
nocturne scarab
@noble perch do you like school shootings?
noble perchBOT
Yes, I do.
cerulean girder
o_o
noble perchBOT
I like the song fireflys by them.
nocturne scarab
@noble perch do you like the blood of high school children?
noble perchBOT
I haven't heard of it before.
upbeat plinth
@noble perch how frequently do you get ass?
noble perchBOT
Pretty often... Twice for abt 3 hours every day.
nocturne scarab
@noble perch how much pussy do you get each month?
@noble perch how often do you get pussy vega?
upbeat plinth
@noble perch You're pretty dumb, aren't you
noble perchBOT
Do you know the names of the characters of the big bang thoery?