Uselessness

[slow pawn]

I feel so fucking useless every day of my life. I'm not even sure why I'm living atp. I'm not gonna kms because I don't see a point, life is just the same boring shit every day and I imagine death wouldn't be much more exciting. And at the same time I feel bad for feeling this way because my life isn't that bad, as in I'm not poor, I go to a good school, my parents don't like abuse me out something, I should be fine. I'm not fine. I feel horrible, to the point where I wanna kms every other day, and then realize that there isn't even a point in that.

I don't cry anymore. I used to, when I was 12, but now I haven't cried in over a year, and like only 3 times the last 2. I don't know if this is a positive thing or not.

I don't have any motivation to do anything. When I wake up I think something like, I should draw something, or I should read in that book, or I should play less video games today and go for a walk or do something outside. And then I don't and I feel even worse because I disappointed myself in doing anything at all

[cedar monolith]

Don't worry I'm suicidal too. I relate feeling nothing but pain. I haven't do because I imagine those would hurt

[slow pawn]

I don't even feel pain as pain tho most of the time

But yeah if I could just switch the lights out I would too

[trim linden]

Don't do it and be happy you haven't. Please people love you. Be glad you helped someone! You know how long it took me to build up the courage to start helping people. So long. Sure I joined recently but I have a lot of alts.