#Gender envy is dragging me down

42 messages · Page 1 of 1 (latest)

austere citrus
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Now look, I don't know if I've gone mentally insane but I swear, the envy is so bad. Every time I pass the women's section in the department store, or even just a perfume shop, or even seeing a girl in a dress, it hurts so much. Every. Single. Time. It starts as envy that quickly turns to dysphoria. One time I went through the women's section in a mall and I swear I felt my chest tighten. I felt dizzy. I thought I was gonna faint. I can't even step outside my home without getting dysphoric at least once. And it flares up during events like Women's Month or Women's Day. I can't even transition because the country I live in is transphobic. I'm stuck as a boy, in real life, forced to see the girls live the life I want and wear the clothes I want, while I'm not even allowed to do any of that. The envy and dysphoria hurts so much, I had to hide my reaction from my parents. I have to avoid certain sections of the mall to protect myself mentally and emotionally. There's more I would say, but this seems to be too long already. But to whoever finishes reading this, thanks a lot. 🌷

sudden mural
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hello

rancid osprey
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do you need a hug? I can give you a virtual one if you want

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you seem like you could use a hug

sudden mural
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im very sorry for your situation, although i cant relate all that much i can be someone to talk to if you wish

restive reef
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I dont think I can help at all but I can relate to you

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And atleast you are saying it instead of keeping it to yourself

austere citrus
austere citrus
quiet cairn
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Sevven understands the feeling.

austere citrus
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I almost forgot to mention, it's been going for like 7 months already.

quiet cairn
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You are not alone, you are not invalid for these feelings. You are human. (Or Bugfolk, like sevven). We all experience great deals of pain and sadness, and it’s part of who we are.

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The feeling may persist, but Sevven will always tell you to be stronger than the chains that bind you

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your pain is caused by matters out of your control so resist it and show the world just how amazing you can be

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Your envy is not your weakness. It is your needs displaying themselves.

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Let that pain guide you to a better, happier life for yourself where you can be the most wonderful person anyone’s ever met.

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Sevven believes in you, regardless of whatever someone else says or what your agonies and woes may cry out.

austere citrus
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This all started ever since I saw that "being a boy must be so boring" trend.

quiet cairn
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go figure, trends are stupid and Sevven ignores them

austere citrus
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And well, I keep wishing I was born a girl just so I can do that stuff like wear perfume, do makeup, pink dresses. But no, I just had to be born in this body.

restive reef
restive reef
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for me its the little social norms that are "girly" but i think are cool

austere citrus
restive reef
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but its not like i want to transition i think im just fantasizing being a girl

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there are also the social pressures or being a boy and all that

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it takes a toll on you

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you get what i mean?

austere citrus
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Yes.

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And for anyone new, in my country our gender markers are permanent

restive reef
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transtions are possible in my country but they are uncommon and just in some places you will straight up be hated

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i also think that if i am to transition my family will not fully support me

austere citrus
austere citrus
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And by the way, ironically I have a phobia of death, but if it wasn't for that, I would've never made it to 2026.

restive reef
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that is one hell of a thing

austere citrus
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I'd rather give up than keep living here

queen orbit
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jane

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@austere citrus

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why give up now

fossil mural
# austere citrus Now look, I don't know if I've gone mentally insane but I swear, the envy is so ...

Hey, so after reading that message of yours I really want to try my best to give you some support,
Going through that, this must be fucking horrible for you and so sorry for all of the hell your are going through): I'm really worried for you is what I mean,

Gender dysphoria is a fucking bitch and it feels like It doesn't go away that must be horrible for you ):

Most importantly I wanted to say we will always support you, we will always like you for what you truly are and even when hope feels lost, there will always be someone here to give support and care about you. I truly mean it,

If you wanna talk im here, and I'm sure other people here will gladly help