#Should I go to a psych ward? tw suicidal and sh

8 messages · Page 1 of 1 (latest)

lusty cipher
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I like wanna be put in a mental hospital but I don’t know if I would classified as “a danger to myself” whatever the fuck that means. What point is that? When I’m researching ways to end my life? When I’m making a plan? When I’m standing on the fucking ledge of a building about to jump? At what point do I have to reach for me to get away from everything for a few days and just sit in silence. For the most part I’ve picked my method, but I haven’t set a day. There’s shit I wanna do before I die, but I feel like if I wait too long I won’t be as suicidal anymore.
I mean that’s it
I know the feeling is passing
But I really wanna fucking die.

Also will going to a mental hospital make people view me differently if they knew? If I do somehow end up going will I have to lie to my friends about why I was gone so they don’t view me as a freak? So they don’t tell other kids and then the whole school will know I want to die? Will they judge me? Should I just kill myself and not even give help a shot? Do I just want to go to a mental hospital for attention? So I can “prove” that I’m suicidal or some shit? Lowk don’t know anymore.

Like things have been getting worse. Literally at the end of the day today I just wanted to cut, but I had to wait till I got home. I just was tired and wanted to feel pain. I used to be able to keep it completely together at school, but now by the end of the day the shitty emotions that fill me at home are spilling into school.

Also dont give me “it’s alright, you’ll be okay” bs. Unless you can tell me what point I would need to be at for a therapist to hospitalize me (in my province you cannot voluntarily admit yourself, a psychiatrist assessment is required first), I don’t really wanna hear it.
(Also don’t worry about me, I’m getting therapy and shit soon.)

maiden sky
stark fulcrum
# lusty cipher I like wanna be put in a mental hospital but I don’t know if I would classified ...

Hey. I know I’m not a professional or anything even close to that but I once went through this. It was certainly tough going through and I thought I could never feel happy again. But I’m better now. There are people who care about you, even me, even though I’m just a stranger on the internet. There are hotlines out there that let you talk, even through text if that’s better for you. There are also ones that legally cannot call EMS or something. And, for me, nobody has even said anything about why I was gone. If you don’t feel like it, don’t tell them. You are not a freak. If you’re worried about faking it, I’m certain you aren’t. I thought the same thing. If you were faking it, you would know.

lusty cipher
stark fulcrum
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<3

lusty cipher
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Thanks to everyone who answered, I ended up going to urgent care last night and I got some help! I wasn’t at risk enough for them to feel the need to put me in a mental hospital (plus they didn’t want to move me to the hospital because of the like 12hr wait time). Today I’m going to some clinic for help, and again thank you all for your kind words! They helped me a lot in reaching out :))

stark fulcrum
maiden sky