TW: Self harm and suicide mentions

[heavy basalt]

||I feel like shit all the time... It might just be better for me to take the rest of the pills... nothing is working for me anymore.. they're in my hand... I'm scared... I honestly don't wanna die but what exit is there...||

[humble timber]

It’s not better to do this to yourself.

It’s never better.

People will be devastated if you die - including me, because I wanna try my damnedest to help you.

Because I love you.

Think of the people you know and see on a day to day basis. Your girlfriend, your mother and father, siblings if you have any, friends, classmates, teachers.

Think of what they’d feel if you stopped showing up one day.

Think of the conversations they’d have.

“Have you seen [] lately?”

“No. I’m scared. Where is she? Where’d she go!?”

Think of their worry, their concern, their love and care for you - and the relentless grief they’d feel if you were to die.

There is no point in ending your own life this early.

You’re senselessly throwing everything out the window in an attempt to end your misery, not bothering to think of just how many great things await you.

And you’re not bothering to think about the great things you’ve done and continue to do for people.

You may think nobody cares, that nobody would realize if you disappeared, that everyone hates you.

But your thoughts are absolutely false.

The same people you think may not care are hoping and praying for you to get better.

They LOVE you and they CARE for you!

Your mind is simply wired against itself - just like mine.

You aren’t a waste, nor are you a failure or a disappointment or a burden.

You are the exact opposite.

You are an outstanding member of the human race.

And if I were there for you, right by your side, I’d ensure that nobody would make you think differently ever again.

Even yourself.

I’m hoping and praying that you’re still alive.

I love you.

Hopefully you’re still out there.

[final mason]

If there's one thing I learnt from having mental problems with idelations of suicide, and from having c^t myself, things will get better with time. It's different for everyone, it may take a few weeks, or months, or years. Find something meaningful in life, could be anything, even if it's unhealthy. It's better than not having a life to live. Think about your pets, or if you don't have one get one. Find a hobby, maybe running, pingpong, hell even chess. ANYTHING that could set you a goal that'd keep you determined.

Just don't give up, people care and that shows. And I know you'll think all of what I am saying and what everyone else is saying is complete bullshit. It's not. You may not directly want help, but the fact you wrote this message at least implies without realizing it you want to get better.

Also, reach out. I know you've heard that a lot, but seriously do reach out. Even if it's to a stranger, or a friend. I will tell you, they will listen to every problem you have.

[gloomy oriole]

People will tell you good things. That never worked for me. For me, it was the amount of pain it caused.

I had a visible bruise around my neck for two months after my first attempt

It hurt. A lot.

The reason why it matters, is suicide only is successful around 13% of the time

You have to live with the pain, and mental scars for the rest of your life

It’s like gambling

It’s very very hard to even come out with any sort of money

And even then the house gains it back when you go again.

[final mason]

Alone suicides never work painlessly, unless with the help of highly illegal substances, or a gun license. And doing it with someone else, well I wouldn't take that chance.

There is a higher chance of you becoming a vegetable than it actually working

So PLEASE consider the consequences of it not actually working also.

[gloomy oriole]

That’s a great sum up