Is something wrong with me?

[orchid basin]

Hey so i just showed my Mom a flyer about Prideflag explenations and she just plain said : "Thats nonsence." I know she didnt mean it like that to hurt me but that really was just like a punch in the face.I mean it just felt like something is wrong with me.I mean she thinks that something i might be a part of is nonsence and that just really stuck with me.Can amyone relate?

[glass mango]

I get it,my mothers kinda like that she has a thick skull and is ignorantly and won’t bother learning on this stuff even if I explain it to her,not that she knows on my stuff

[orchid basin]

Im sorry about that, it sounds really hard 🙁
But its not like shes not trying to learn its just sometimes she is expressing herself wrong.Thats really annoying.
But if u wanna vent im here to listen.

[glass mango]

Nah it isn’t about me it’s about yoy but that’s annoying if she’s majorly trying to atleast learn while I think you can appreciate her I think you have the right to also be upset with her regardless of intentions maybe speak to her on it if you can on your sensitivity regarding this topic

[orchid basin]

Yeaah i think your right.But i haate these deep talks😭 especially with parents, its an issue im trying to work on.Idk its just rlly hard for me to talk abt these type of problems.
But idk sometimes i js have the feeling that my mother wants a normal feminine daughter.Like one who wears makeup and bras and who loves boys.Like that oerfect live ive always dreamed abt when i was younger.But now i have the feeling smths wrong with me bc im not perfect like the rest of my girl classmates😕

[gloomy sphinx]

Dude I understand so muchhh. My mom has a 30yo daughter who is nowhere near what my mothers “ideal” daughter is, so I feel almost pressured into being the perfect daughter. But honestly fuck that. Be who you are. Life is more fun when you don’t hide who you are.

[glass mango]

I feel that with parents like idk why but my parents just say dumb shit all the time when someone younger asks for advice or these deep talks I don’t really talk to them but my sister does and it honestly feels insufferable to listen to.
Are they like that?or is it more so you are scared on their replies?

Tbh I’m not experienced with this but I heard from a queer adult once “your parents can love you,but maybe not all of you” it doesn’t have to apply to queerness but life and other things in general.When it comes to how you act I think if she’s a good parent she should stop forcing gender stereotypes on you being a girly girl it’s your choice,even if she does want it it’s not the end of the world.
As for your sexuality she should accept it and come to your wedding with a potential partner like that,but it’s not a requirement she has to love it it’s okay to have preferences sometimes.
Ik it sounds painful on that part trust me but it’s just how these old school parents are they suck with this shit 99% of the time and sometimes we have to aim for the most realistic one but I’m sure she’ll still love you

[orchid basin]

Yeah its not like they are not trying but im always scared on how they react bc maybe if i complain abt how they say things to me they call me sensetive or that i overreact.
Im scared that makes me an ungreatful daughter bc they love and many ppl dont have that live so is it even in my right to complain abt smth like that? Idk sometimes i maybe push this to the side and say to myself that its not that important bc other ppl dont have such a good life. It feels like im being ungreatful.
And i think my mom is trying to be ok with me not wanting to fit into the girly girl stereotype like with bras and stuff like that.
And god knows she hates makeup but sometimes its back to this girly thing when it comes abt clothes and its js the way she says it.

Like "if i had your body i wouldve worn this or that, when i dont feek comfortable in these clothes and that really pulls me down.
But ik my parents are trying to support me with my sexual orientation.
I just feel uncomfortable talking abt it idk why.

[glass mango]

I’d think to this myself a lot when I ask my friends to get my pronouns right since I go by they/them but I also went by she/they once and they always got it wrong and it pissed me off the moment they slipped off and I’d correct it.
You wouldn’t beleive how much of a hassle it is with these people but I often felt guilty and wonder if it’s my fault for being sensitive sometimes,my other straight cisgender friend said I shouldn’t have to worry on it cause it’s their fault it’s my identity and they should respect it,it’s honestly the bare fucking minimum if you think about it but we think we are sensitive for it cause people these days are to lazy to bother and respect that.Your mother shouldnt joke about your sexuality if it’s sensitive especially around her,she should respect you with that.

I think it’s just her mood swings and stuff don’t worry about that,but I think she’s just remenancing on her older days since she’s pretty old now and her body isn’t as great probably so she wishes she could try younger stuff but imo you can tell her to stop without going deep for these.

[orchid basin]

Yeah i will try to do that its just really hard for me to talk abt stuff like that.

[glass mango]

I understand

I hope you feel even a bit better

[orchid basin]

But i always hate it when they say like "Ok maybe your turning lesbian or maybe your turning bi" or "its ok if u turn lesbian/bi" like im not turning that way i have always been like that its just the way many ppl say it like btch i have been like this my whole FUCNIN live.
And also that im not lesbian but bi bc i say that boys are hot on the tv too often, like maybe i only did that bc o was afraid to not like boys.Ever thought abt that..huh? But i think they are js trying to support it, they js dont know how.

Oh and ty i feel better its good talking to ppl who get how i feel👍🏻
I feel apreciated❤️

[glass mango]

Yeah they don’t know how queer people work usually especially these old timers they always go like its. A sudden change and it never happened before.
Ik even allies do that and it’s not homophobic but it just bothers me a lot personally acting like i did this to myself.
Goodluck with communicating these with your parents tho!

[glass mango]

💙

[orchid basin]

Ty i wish u best luck too.
Have a good one💙

[glass mango]

Thank you mate you to💙