I genuinely cant stop thinking about certain things. I cant stop thinking about how fucked up mentally I am. I have autism and im pretty sure a bunch of undiagnosed disorders that ruin my life. I wanna ask my dad to get me tested for certain disorders and stuff but hes old fashioned and I feel like he'll say no. Another thing i cant stop thinking about it relationships. Whether friendships or dating, im shitty at both. I feel like im not good enough for my friends and I somehow manage to ruin every relationship I have. I genuinely miss one of my exes sm rn. His name was Eryx. He was so kind and funny and sweet and we had alot in common but my shitty mental state caused me to distance myself from him but thats what caused him to start hating me. I miss him so much and I wish I could tell him that but I cant and there's nothing I can do about it. Im genuinely so desperate for a relationship to be good that I develop crushes on anyone that's just nice to me and its pathetic.
#lowk cant stop thinking
topaz escarp
golden escarp
🫂