I can't do this anymore. Every day I have to deal with people calling me a girl, my deadname, all that shit. And I can't do anything about it. I can't come out as trans, I can't correct anyone, because everyone I know is a goddamn Christian, or just not supportive. Hell, the Christmas season just makes its even worse. I feel like I should be happy, but all I can think about everyday is how nobody I love will ever see me as a guy. I just went to get a Christmas tree with my parents about an hour ago, and literally felt like shit the entire time simply because I feel like I don't pass to anyone. I broke down crying when I got home, and had to come up with some shit about things not going how I planned or whatever. And my dad called me immature because I, "was pouting since I didn't get my way". I wanted to tell him I was crying because I fucking hate this body and how no one sees me as a boy. Every day seems like I'm just hiding inside of a damn shell. I just want my family, my parents specifically, to love me for who I am. I honestly don't know if I can keep living like this.
#I don't want to live like this
amber pilot
wintry sierra
I can't do this anymore. Every day I have to deal with people calling me a girl,...
I'm sorry u feel this way, as a transmasc myself I'm just trying to roll with the punches and that's I guess the best advice I can give you :( if you need to hear this, we are all proud of you for coming out to us, random strangers on the internet. Tbh I feel like people on the internet are more empathetic than people you know in person. If you ever need to talk about this again, we're all here for you and wanna support. From transmasc to transmasc, I believe in you. You can live until it changes. Once you get a car, that's when you should come out. If your parents support (or at least one), then that's so freakin awesome for you and I'd be so happy to hear that you got that experience. But if not, well... Just wing it. Live free. Be yourself, be the you that you wanna be. Be the you that you are. I'm proud of you for sharing this even though I don't know you :]
I'm Christian too, er- well, more Catholic than Christian, but if anyone is being transphobic, say this: "we all only get one chance to live, I'm not letting other people hold me back from being myself".
(Also, Jesus never said anything about bullying gay/trans people!!)