I always come here and I dont know if ill be able to but I never seem to fully speak about how I feel and I really want to be able to especially to my loved ones.I have not been feeling good like at all all year and in general most of my life and like lately I just feel like it won't get better and I go into a state of wanting to die or hurt myself.I know people say that they love me but I dont feel it and I just feel like such an attention seeker.I want to talk to my closest friends but everytime they ask me if im okay or in general or sometimes if im obviously crying I just feel like I have to say im fine when I just want to cry for help.I never can express how I feel and it feels like im being silenced by something I can't explain.I physically can not explain this.I cant tell them how I dont plan to be here much longer.I cant tell them how I feel unwanted and annoying.I cant tell them any of it and it makes me feel horrible.
#Just need to get stuff off my shoulders
wheat jasper
fringe bison
i get it, like 100%.