You shouldn't be upset at yourself for expressing your own grief. You're are going through tough times and you have all the right to feel sad.
#I feel so ill (TWs included as mentioned)
deep summit
Everyone lives death in their own way. Some cry a lot, others sit in silence. No grief is bigger than the other
You are being thoughtful by reaching out to your friends, but you need to focus on yourself as well
It's not selfishness, it's about survival and elaborating what's happening around you
You need to focus on yourself because your mind demands it. You need to elaborate these deaths
You don't have to do this alone either
Suffering is universal, people around you will be empathic towards you
I'll be homest some may lash out at you, but it's not because you are the problem. More so it's because they are processing their own grief in their own way and there's nothing wrong with you